poading
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Goodnight sunshine
Goodnight moon
Goodnight Canadian wolf bird loon -
Lucius Spriggs and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by poading
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
05 Jul 2022
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Drowning isn’t the worst thing to happen to Lucius Spriggs. Top five. Top eight. Definitely at least top ten.
Somehow, drowning’s not even the worst thing to happen to Lucius this week.
No, that particular honor belongs to an event that comes around midday. Literally. In the most vulgar sense. God, he wishes he was dreaming. And on second thought that would be a nightmare, so actually, no thank you.
Or: Lucius Spriggs spots the co-captains reconciling through the window of the captain's quarters after nearly drowning and hates his life so very very much.
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The first time is quick. Ed has been thinking about it for weeks, kissing Stede Bonnet. It is the sort of thing he wants to do right. Though Stede’s never mentioned it in any of their lessons, Ed is certain there is a right way to go about kissing a gentleman. He must wait for the right time, the right place.
But when he finally does it, Ed doesn’t think at all. He is only instinct and hope tangled in a moment where breath is forgotten and the future seems possible.
OR: Five times Ed kisses Stede and one time Stede kisses Ed
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They do not choose Bolo for the job; Loquatius Seelie does.
The infiltration of Avalir is meant for someone else, as her superiors tell her. It is not inconsequential, the number of times they say she is unfit for such work. She is not beautiful enough to tempt so famous a man as the Herald, she is not skilled enough to accomplish what must be done, and she is not important enough for anyone in Aeor to so much as consider sending her.
But in the end, it does not matter. Her worth is not theirs to decide.
Sent to spy on Avalir and learn their secrets, Bolo from Aeor gets exactly what she came for.
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“I may not understand it, and I definitely don’t like it, but for some focking reason that is beyond comprehension, my boss has a weakness when it comes to you. And I’m—” he chokes back bile. “I’m absolutely certain you’re the only person in this whole god forsaken ocean who can talk sense into him. So, get in the focking dinghy.”
Bonnet’s lips twitch ever so slightly into a smile. “Well, maybe if you were to ask me nicely.”
“Get in the dinghy.”
“What’s the magic word?”
Izzy screws up his face, trying to recall anything he’s ever heard about magic. The memory comes to him of some insipid story Bonnet told the crew one night about a girl and a dress and some fucking mice, so he says, “Bipity focking bopity focking doo.”
“I was looking for please, but I suppose that will do.”
After realizing Edward isn't actually better off as Blackbeard, Izzy Hands seeks out the last person on earth he'd like to spend any length of time trapped in a dinghy with: Stede focking Bonnet.
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Stede seems determined to win Edward back. It must be why he keeps “accidentally” showing up in Edward’s life.
Izzy scoffs. “He just doesn’t learn, does he? Tell him Blackbeard has no use for apologies.”
“Yeah,” Edward says. “That’s true. I don’t. But also, unrelated to that other thing, what else did he say about me?”
Frenchie blinks. “Um. Nothing? The message came tied to a seagull’s leg so. You know. Not much real estate on those little papers. Can’t write a lot, can you?” He straightens suddenly. “Oh, I still have it!”
He fishes a crumpled, wind-dampened piece of paper from his pocket and drops it into Edward’s hand. When Edward unfurls it, he sees only a series of poorly-drawn images: The Revenge with a little triangle sail, a rope ladder and an arrow, a caricature of Stede looking like he’s crying.
“We really need to teach you guys how to read,” Edward notes.
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22 May 2022
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Co-captains. Shit. He’s really fucking in it now, isn’t he.
Ed downs his brandy. Takes it quick enough to not really taste.
“Well, I’m off,” he says, pushing to his feet. Stede shifts in his seat.
“You know, I meant to ask,” Stede says, his tone edged in slightly false casualness. “Where, ah—where have you been sleeping?”
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20 May 2022
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Ed and Jim are both new to this whole “committed relationship” thing, but apparently people in relationships get each other gifts. A difficult task when one has no idea what they’re doing.
People in love – at least, people from Stede’s world who are in love – get each other gifts. This is a newly learned fact for Ed, but it is a fact nonetheless. Mary got Stede gifts. Mary got Stede many gifts. The lighthouse painting still hanging in their shared captains’ quarters, that was a gift from Mary. Stede has half of a petrified orange beside their bed, a gift from his daughter.
Stede owns nothing of Ed’s. Ed has given Stede nothing.
This may, he realizes with dread, have been an oversight.
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16 May 2022
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Lucius Spriggs: the unofficial – and involuntary – relationship counselor of The Revenge.
“Edward has something he needs to say to you, don’t you, Ed?”
Blackbeard shifts his weight. He can’t seem to meet Lucius’s eyes, which is all right with Lucius, given that the last time they made eye contact Lucius was tossed into the sea and nearly died.
“I’m,” Blackbeard says. He lets out a breath. “I’m sorry for trying to kill you. I was taking my emotions out on you instead of dealing with them in a healthy way.”
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13 May 2022
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He gives it a few days, watching the golden hairs grow on Stede’s face, and watching Stede frown and scratch his chin more often. But Stede doesn’t act any different. There’s no secret plans Ed can detect.
Ed confronts Stede over it one afternoon in Stede’s quarters. He’s given the matter a lot of thought, and he’s considered how best to bring it up. Stede is a gentleman, so Ed will broach the subject delicately.
“What the fuck are you doing with your face?”
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13 May 2022