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Gwaine liked making puns. Jokes were his thing, and he had a habit of using humour in the most inappropriate of times. If he was honest, that just encouraged him to continue, even if the King had threatened multiple times to have his head on a spike if he continued. Knowing that the Princess wouldn’t actually do it, and even if he tried, his boyfriend would stop him, Gwaine continued with his usual jokes.
Today was no exception to the rule, even if they were in a slightly precarious situation. They had been out on a Hunt, which had led to some bounty Hunters stalking them down, which Gwaine wasn’t too impressed with. Mostly because they were searching for a sorcerer, which made Merlin a target, and Gwaine wasn’t ever going to let that happen.
Nor was Arthur. Admittedly, even if the Princess was usually a pain in the arse, Gwaine could at least admit that Arthur was good at protecting Merlin. It was one of the things they had in common, and probably the only reason why Gwaine was still alive. Making a joke last week about the King being the pregnant one, with the way his waistline was rapidly expanding, had been a step too far. Guinevere had laughed, though, which was a bonus. As had Merlin and Morgana, even if they were at the other end of the room practicing their witchy powers.
Back to the bounty Hunters. They had been tied up in some dark cellar, with Arthur threatening them with a colourful vocabulary as they poked and prodded at each of his men.
‘Do you do Magic?’ It was a question, very poorly phrased, but the best opportunity that Gwaine had ever seen in his life as a chaotic-pun master. Looking across to his boyfriend, who had also picked up on the wording and was glaring at him, Gwaine decided this was perfect. He could use this to distract them while Merlin got them out of these chains, and had the chance to wind up Arthur. The Princess had very specifically told Gwaine and Merlin that he didn’t want to know anything about their relationship.
‘Excuse me, if I may interrupt, kind Sir,’ The man looked across from where he’d been threatening Lancelot, all of the Knights staring at Gwaine like he was mad,
‘I do Magic.’ He provided, watching Merlin duck his head as his cheeks began to bloom dark red. Obviously, when Gwaine found out that his boyfriend was not only a very powerful Warlock, but Magic itself, he had been impressed. Merlin was keeping that little titbit of information from the King, at the moment, and so Gwaine was delighted he had been trusted. Plus, Merlin was working on a spell to summon ale from water, which Gwaine was very intrigued with. Purely for the development of his powers, of course. Nothing to do with the ale.
‘You do Magic?’ The man repeated, eyeing him up and down like he doubted that fact. Gwaine licked his lips, thinking back to the fact that he had woken up with Magic-incarnated wrapped up in his arms, head tucked under his chin, softly snuffling in his sleep.
‘Yep. All the time. At least once a day, if not more.’ The other Knights looked just as baffled as the bounty hunter, probably because he and Merlin never really acted affectionate in front of them. His Warlock was still nervous, worried that they wouldn’t approve of Merlin because he was a servant. Gwaine had told his boyfriend that he’d personally hunt them all down if they said anything against him, but Merlin had just ducked his head. Rather like he was doing now, cheeks burning.
‘You do Magic so often?’ Another one of the men questioned, and Gwaine forgot that for Merlin, Magic was easy. His boyfriend could summon up fire one moment, and then move on to creating butterflies with ease. Some sorcerers couldn’t even perform Magic every day.
‘Doing Magic is fun. Rewarding.’ Lancelot had got it. He was looking at Merlin, then back to Gwaine, before putting on his best “I’m not impressed” face, while trying to hide his smirk.
‘Does it make you feel… powerful?’ Gwaine considered this question, wondering if he ever felt powerful. Sometimes, when Merlin was so distracted by his gentle touches that he lost control of his Magic, that was thrilling. Knowing that he was trusted, that Merlin liked him, despite the fact that he was a King of his people.
‘Sometimes. I like to have control over it.’ Lancelot choked, which ultimately meant that Percival and Elyan caught on. They looked across to Merlin, who was staring at the ground like it could swallow him up, while his hands moved behind his back. Undoing the cuffs, he realised. Smart.
Although, Merlin could just take them all out without needing to move a muscle.
‘You can control Magic? Make it bend to your will?’ Huh, he looked across to Merlin, caught the look in his eye. If Gwaine was lucky, he might just get a sharp pout. It was more likely to be Merlin denying him cuddles, and Gwaine kipping on the floor.
‘You could use the phrase “it likes being on its knees for me”.’ Leon was the next to get it, mostly because Merlin finally broke free from the chains with a flash of gold, obviously impatient considering that Gwaine was spilling their sex life.
The bounty hunter had been so distracted by Gwaine’s speech, that he hadn't noticed Merlin until the Warlock had already unchained Lancelot, the Knight rushed at him while Merlin moved on to the other Knights.
Arthur got it, staring between them, then groaning.
‘I am genuinely considering having you executed.’ He grumbled, although he did give Merlin a nod when the Warlock unchained him. Lancelot had taken down the man, while the others grabbed weapons and prepared for the fight.
‘Come on, Merlin!’ Arthur ordered, as usual, impatient to the very end. Gwaine was still chained up, watched his boyfriend slowly smirk.
‘Yeah, give me a minute. I’ll catch you up.’ He should have been offended that the Knights had left, but then again, they had left him with a very annoyed Warlock.
‘You know, you look cute when you’re angry. All scrunched up like a kitten.’ His attempt of complimenting his boyfriend just made Merlin’s eyes flick golden, something that Gwaine would quite happily admit turned him on.
‘You do Magic, huh?’ Merlin reached a hand for him, tracing the edge of his chainmail curiously. Gwaine decided that Merlin couldn’t be too angry, not if he was joking.
‘Just telling the truth, sweetheart.’ The nickname had Merlin laughing, before he leaned in to press a kiss to Gwaine’s lips, gentle but oddly heated. Gwaine would have chased after it, had he not been chained up, so he gestured to his restraints.
‘Fancy letting me out?’ Sometimes, he forgot that Merlin could quite easily meet his chaotic energy, if not exceed it. Like now, with that gleam in his eye as he cocked his head to the side, all cute smiles and innocent eyes, sharp cheekbones and neckerchiefs that hid skin he really wanted to see.
‘I thought you liked it when I’m on my knees?’ Merlin questioned, before dropping down.
Gwaine decided that his puns weren’t always bad, and Arthur was just going to have to put up with them.
It was worth the risk of execution.