Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Immobile. He couldn't move an inch.

It was lucky he did not need oxygen to survive, for the mech had been holding his breath for quite some time. He was doing his best to ignore the searing pain he felt spreading around his entire body, tuning out the sound of his Energon dripping onto the floor and the growling that came from the Predacons. It took all his remaining strength to lie completely still as if his spark had been snuffed out.

As if he were dead.

He was badly wounded. Scrapped. His wings had been torn and shredded, and his chassis was covered in deep gashes with Energon pooling underneath them. One of his optics had been clawed out, and his left leg was bent unnaturally. As much as he wanted to wail in agony and try to squirm away from the Predacons, he urged himself to stay still.

He waited.

He waited until the growling of the Predacons began to fade, sounding further and further away. Until, silence.

He wanted to look, to confirm the Predacons had left him alone. But he didn’t dare. It could be a trick. To make him believe he was safe, letting his guard down and then terminating him for good.

It wasn’t until he heard Predaking’s voice commanding the other Predacons to leave him here to rust that he knew he should continue to wait. He waited, hearing their wings flap as they left him there. Scrapped and abandoned.

He waited.

He waited until he knew if he didn’t act soon, he would die from Energon loss. He shakily sunk his claws into the wall next to him, whimpering as he dragged himself up. His broken leg scraped along the hall as he made his way down to where he believed the med Bay was. He hadn't been at Darkmount for several thousand years, so his memory of the place was foggy. But he wouldn’t die. He didn’t keep himself alive this long just to die in this way. Scrapped and abandoned.

He got to the med bay, punching the control and dragging himself inside. He scanned the room with his one functioning optic and found just what he’d been hoping for. His body was beyond repair. But even after all these years, it was still here, and it was the only thing that would save his spark. With trembling servos, he opened the pod, wincing as it hissed open. He grabbed the larger chassis, urging his broken form to hold out a little longer. He laid the chassis down on a medical berth and plugged in a tube just like one would during a cortical psychic patch. He grabbed an IV connected to a bag of Energon, and connected it to the chassis and made sure the Energon was flowing into the body. Then he connected another tube to a separated berth. He laid himself on the berth, and with the rest of his remaining strength, pushed a small button. Then everything went dark.

He woke with a start.

His eyes were groggy, his vision blurry. Soon, it cleared, and he nearly jumped off the berth when he saw his scrapped body on a berth next to him. Was he dead? He turned his head around and noticed he was plugged to an IV. He let out a sigh of relief. So he wasn’t dead. Which meant…

“It worked”, he said, then began taking in deep breaths as a shaky smile spread across his face, “I’m alive… I’m alive!”.

He let out a nervous laugh, but it soon died down. He let out a sigh of relief. He survived. His plan was successful. It worked. He just lay there for a few blissful moments, savouring the fact he was alive.

But soon, his relief turned into bitterness. Megatron. He’d left him here. Left him to be torn by those revenge-crazed creatures. He’d left him, after everything he did for his master. Former master. He scowled, clenching his servos tightly.

Megatron would pay.

He would pay for everything he did to him. For beating him. For infiltrating his mind. For tossing him aside when his beloved Shockwave returned. And for abandoning him. For leaving him to the Predacons, knowing exactly what they’d do to him. For not sparing a thought that he would leave his former second in command to suffer such a fate. He would regret leaving him like this. Scrapped and abandoned.

Chapter Text

“Log date 1:
I am currently leaving Cybertron… again. And I am on the search for my Ma– for Megatron. I have managed to gather all the remaining Energon reserves from Dark Mount and taken one of the ships docked below. So far everything is going along smoothly, and I am sure that I will find him sooner or later. And when I do, I will make him pay for his many crimes against me. Nothing else to report. Starscream out.”
…
“Log date 13:
It has been 13 solar cycles since I have left Cybertron and have begun to search. There is no sign of my former master just yet, but I must remain patient. I know that sooner or later, Megatron will slip up. And I’ll be there to make sure he stays down, permanently. Then, I will cement my reign as the true leader of the Decepticons, and gather our forces to reclaim Cybertron. Now I must check to make sure the ship is in order. That’s the one downside to being alone. You have to do everything yourself, but then again I always did other bot’s work eh? Starscream out.”.
…
“Log date 32:
It has been an Orbital cycle. Megatron has still evaded me, but I know I will find him at some point. I have stopped by a nearby planet which appears to have some Energon reserves. Luckily and unluckily, there isn’t a Bot or Con in sight. Well, that is good news. Means my reserves will hold up longer till I can find another reserve somewhere. I must check into the med bay for… reasons. Starscream out.”.
…

Log date 192:
Six Orbital cycles. No signal yet. I’ve passed an asteroid belt with minimal damage to the ship, which I have fixed myself. Again. It does get tiresome doing this all by myself, but it’s none the matter. I will find Megatron, and then this will be over. I need to make sure the ship is in perfect condition before I can take off again. Starscream… out.”.
…
Log date 640:
Nothing. Went to another Energon reserve. Not a fragging mech in sight. Just more fragging Energon. And Megatron is still out there. But I will find him… somehow. I must. Then this miserable torture will be worth it. I’m going now. Scrap to do. Starscream out.”.
…
“Log date 1828? 1838?
Frag it. I’ve lost count. Doesn’t matter. Fragging Megatron is nowhere. How can a mech that big just vanish?! Where is he?! I just– my processor aches. I need to recharge. I have no indication of time anymore, but it doesn’t matter. I just need to find him. That’s all that matters. Not this fragging feeling in my spark, not this drowning silence, not this urge to rip the spark from my chamber! None of it fragging matters! Whatever. Just, Starscream out.”.
…
“I’m losing my fragging processor! This is fragging mad! I’m so stupid! I’m such a… maybe Megatron was right. Maybe I am just wasting my– no! Don’t think that! That’s just what that slagger wants you to think. Just… talk. Yes, talk to it. That’s all you need to do… oh! Um. Well, Starscream out.”.
…
“Log date– frag it. It doesn’t matter anymore. Megatron was right, and I was wrong. But still… only finding Megatron will bring me what I want. That’s all I have left. My hatred for him and that hope that I will get back at him. I will get my revenge, even if it drives me mad. Only that will bring me peace. Only justice will bring peace. And even if it means returning here… then so be it. Megatron, I’m coming for you. Starscream out.”.
…
He took a shaky gulp, steering the ship down into the planet’s atmosphere. He went slowly so as to not burn the ship up. After what felt like megacycles, the ship touched the planet’s ground.

He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. He moved away from the command console and towards the glass. He looked out onto the native wildlife, letting out a sad sigh. Fifteen. Fifteen stellar cycles of searching for Megatron with no result. And now he was here.

Earth.

Everything seems to come full circle, and Starscream didn’t like the sound of that. Full circle meant it was ending, and Starscream was not in the mood to hear about his end.

Not after what happened on Dark Mount.

He had escaped with a sliver of a chance of survival, and he was not about to let all the scrap he went through have been for nothing. He didn’t suffer alone on this ship, slowly losing his mind just for his journey to come to an abrupt end.

At least now there were no Autobots. He was alone. He was at peace.

For the first time in stellar cycles, Starscream smiled. Not one of malice or sarcasm. A genuine, blissful smile.

He was happy. For now.

Chapter Text

Bumblebee was back on Earth. And now, Optimus Prime had given him and his team a mission.

When he, Strongarm and Sideswipe had arrived on Earth, they’d met Fix-it, the guard aboard the Alchemor. Then, they added a new member to their team; a Dinobot called Grimlock. They had also become friends with the humans Denny and Russell, who gave them shelter in a scrapyard.

His team had endured many tests and fought against numerous Decepticon criminals, and succeeded.

They also met another Bot by the name of Drift, and he joined their group along with his students Slipstream and Jetstorm.

The team was faring well and had recently recaptured the Decepticon criminal Chop-Shop. Currently, Bumblebee had returned from patrol. He greeted Denny and Russell, then made his way to where Fix-It was checking the database.

"Hey Fix-It," he said, "No new Decepticon activity I hope.".

Fix-It shook his head. "Nothing yet, Lieutenant," he confirmed, "though I did want to ask if you would let me go on this small fission– addition– mission!".

"Well, what's the mission?" Bumblebee asked. "I wanted to make sure we do have all the pods for the Decepticons," Fix-It said, "you know, so we don't run out of pods.".

Bumblebee nodded. "Would you like some backup?" he asked, and Fix-It let out a small chuckle. "I don't think that will be necessary Lieutenant," he said, "But I would like to request Denny Clay to accompany me.". "Understood," Bumblebee responded, "I'll go check if he's free.". Then, Bumblebee transformed and went to look for Denny.

He found Denny and his son Russell talking nearby and went up to them. "Sorry to interrupt you two," Bumblebee said.

"Oh it's no problem Bee," Denny said, walking up to the black and yellow sports car, "what can I help you with?". "Fix-It was wondering if you could come with him to scout the area for stasis pods," he answered.

"Sorry Bee, but I can't be out too long," Denny said, "I've got a customer coming in a few hours and I can't reschedule. But Russell could go.".

"Russell, that okay with you?" Bumblebee asked the boy, and Russel shrugged in response.

"Eh, why not?" he said, "got nothing else to do."

"Great," Bumblebee said, "well I'd better get back out there, the Cons have been a little too quiet lately.". With that, Bumblebee sped off.

When he had left the scrapyard's premises, Russell made his way to the command centre to meet up with Fix-It before their departure.

Russell was starting to regret his decision to come along with Fix-It.

The minicon was rambling and glitching about boring stories of his time aboard the Alchemor as they trudged through the forest, finding nothing but trees, mud, and grass. Russell groaned, hoping things would become interesting before he died of boredom. He spoke too soon.

Not a moment later, Fix-It's screen popped up, signalling several alerts. "What's wrong?" Russell asked, worried when he saw the minicon's alert expression.

"It can't be!" he said, "my scanners read a foreign Cybertronian signal in these woods!".

"Could it be a Decepticon?!" Russell said anxiously, "Should we call Bee?".

Fix-It shook his head. "There is no need to get Lieutenant Bumblebee involved just yet," Fix-It assured, "after all, the scanner could be faulty, and the Lieutenant doesn't need to be bothered in a wild goose chase. We can investigate the signal. No need to start fights if there isn't a need for one.". Russell nodded, following Fix-It.

Okay, maybe calling the Lieutenant wasn't such a bad idea.

Fix-It and Russell had followed the signal, and now the two were face to face with a Warship. And due to its appearance and the large symbol plastered on the side, Fix-It could tell it was of Decepticon origin.

But before he could tell Russell that now would be a good time to call for backup, Fix-It realised too late the boy had run to the warship and had to run after him. Fix-It tried to call Russel back, but the boy had already gone inside.

The minicon had no choice but to go in after him.

Right into a giant warship, that belonged to a Decepticon criminal, who would skewer them for intruding his ship and messing with whatever evil plans he was scheming.

Fix-It gulped but reminded himself he had weapons to defend Russell and himself. He could do this.

He went aboard the ship and found Russell wandering the ship's halls.

"Russel!" Fix-It shout-whispered, "we should get out of here and call the Lieutenant!".

Russell looked back at Fix-It and beckoned him by waving his hand. "Come on Fix!" he said, "a small peek won't hurt.".

"B-but," the minicon said, trembling.

Russell came over to the minicon and gave him a reassuring look. "Look, I promise if it gets too dangerous, we'll call Bee," he said, "promise.". Fix-It, still unsure but knowing the boy wouldn't change his mind, nodded.

"This is still a bad idea," the minicon said, never dropping his guard.

But Russell wasn't paying attention. He was too focused admiring the ship. They didn't go into any rooms, per Fix-It's pleading, but Russell was content just being able to explore the ship.

They were coming up towards a room with no doors, from which they heard a voice.

The voice sounded tired as if whoever it belonged to hadn't slept in ages. "– unable to find anything that could indicate his presence on this planet," said the voice, "and since my Energon reserves are running low, I am stuck on this planet until I find more.".

Russell came closer to the voice, curious. Fix-It cursed human curiosity as he followed the boy. Russell peered into the room and saw a large mech. The mech was multicoloured, with a red torso and abdomen, grey arms till the elbows, the rest was blue except for grey clawed servos, white and black legs, and blue heeled peds. He had a black helmet, with strange symmetrical spikes, but Russell couldn't see the mech's face due to the mech facing away from him. The mech also had a pair of grey wings with greyish blue and red details. And stamped on each was the purple symbol of the Decepticons.

"Despite this problem," the mech said, speaking into a screen, "I am beginning to question if the search for my former master is worth the trouble.".

And then, Russell made a huge mistake.

He stepped into the room and walked closer to the mech. Fix-It's panic escalated, and he rushed into the room to grab Russell and leave before the Decepticon saw them. Just then, an alarm rang out. "Scrap.".

The Decepticon turned around, his red optics boring into Fix-It's blue ones.

The minicon's grip on Russel's arm tightened. Then, he spun off and ran, Russel running beside him. The Con shook out of his confusion, turning back to the console and pressing a button.

"Intruders: detected," said a robotic voice, "lockdown mode: Initiated.".

Then, the Con went in the direction the other two went, chasing after them.

"I told you this was a bad idea!" squealed Fix-It as they ran through the halls of the ship and to where the exit was.

Russell didn't say anything. Instead, he ran faster. He heard large pedsteps behind him, and he knew the Con was after them. "Fix-It, he's following us!" Russell yelled, running as fast as he could. "Scrap Scrap Scrap!" the minicon swore, "we're nearly at the doors!".

Then his spark sank.

There would be no escape with the doors shut. "We're trapped!" Fix-It yelped, turning around to try and find another way out only to slam into a large ped.

"Yes, you are.".

Fix-It shakily looked up, yelping and rolling backwards when his optics met the red ones of the mech. The mech was scowling, but his weapons remained at his sides. "What are you doing on my ship minicon," he said to Fix-It, before turning his attention to Russell, "and with a human pet.".

"I'm no one's pet Con!" Russell retorted before Fix-It shoved him aside.

"P-please pardon the human's dispersed– coerced– outburst!" Fix-It said, trying to appease the mech, "I mean, we all know humans can be a little, uh, irrational!". He added a nervous chuckle, hoping the mech would reconsider crushing them under his ped.

"You didn't answer my question, minicon," the mech snarled, "What are you doing on my ship?". Fix-It swore he recognized his voice, but his description fits none of the prisoners on the Alchemor's list.

"Oh, um– wait," the minicon said, "Y-you're Starscream aren't you?! B-but your visual description does not match the ones in my database. Have you been, 'working out'?". The mech looked at the minicon, surprised that someone knew him. "It's a long story," Starscream said, crossing his arms, "now answer my question.".

"We're not answering anything Con!" Russell snapped, and Fix-It had to hold the boy back before he did anything stupid. Starscream just rolled his eyes and didn't shoot Russell into oblivion like Fix-It thought he would.

“Pardon him!” Fix-It squeaked, “to answer your question, I am just a guard on a prison ship. I got stranded here and this human is a friend of mine. B-but we don’t want to cause any trouble with you.”.

It wasn’t a total lie. He just didn’t mention that he was with a group of Autobots. Fix-It gave a nervous smile, hoping the Con wouldn’t ask for more information.

Russell had other ideas.

“Yeah! And we’re friends with Bumblebee!” Russell spat, ignoring Fix-It’s horrified look, “and if you do anything to us, you’ll regret it!”.

The Con’s eyes widened, feeling like someone had punched him in the spark chamber.

“Bumblebee?!” he shouted, “Bumblebee is here too?!”. Fix-It gulped, teeth chattering, and Russell realized his error.

Just then, Starscream let out a curse so vigorous, Fix-It felt the need to cover Russell’s ears.

“Why can't these damn Autobots leave me alone?!” he yelled, and Russell could tell the question was rhetorical. “I’m not even doing anything to them and yet they still have to bother me!” he screamed angrily, though Russell could hear his voice crack.

Starscream was silent for a long time, before punching a button on the side of the wall. The doors snapped open with a hiss, and Russell turned around to see their way out.

“Leave,” Starscream spat, “just… leave me alone.”.

Russell heard… sadness in the mech’s voice. The mech turned his head to look at Russell, and Russell quickly noticed how tired the mech looked. There were dark circles under his optics, his metal brows were loosely furrowed, and his frown wasn’t malicious, but disheartened. Fix-It grabbed Russell’s arm, and he reluctantly followed the minicon off the warship. He gave one last glance towards Starscream, but the mech’s head had turned away once again.

Once the two were off the ship, Starscream punched the button again and the doors closed.

When the two were off the ship and the doors were closed, Starscream walked down the hall to the med bay, pedsteps echoing throughout the lonely halls of the warship. He pressed the button on the wall, and the doors opened into the med bay. He entered, laying down on a medical berth next to his old chassis. “Hey,” he said hoarsely, “haven’t talked to you for a while huh?”.

The chassis didn’t respond. Starscream didn’t expect it to. But talking to it helped. It was nice to have something listening to him.

He talked to it about what had just happened. How he was running low on Energon, wondering if this quest for revenge was really worth it, about the minicon and the human, about Bumblebee being on this planet. He rambled about other nonsense, just enjoying the feeling of being able to vent to something after all these years of keeping it to himself. For millennia he had to hide his emotions, hide care for others. Caring was weak, and the weak had no place in the Decepticons. Megatron had told him that. And it was true. He cared for two bots, and they both betrayed him. He learned to stop caring, stop emoting, not even in his own mind. His own mind wasn’t safe from Megatron. He’d made that painfully obvious when Starscream had returned to the Decepticons. There was nothing he could hide from Megatron. He’d broken him.

And then, he found himself rambling about something he hadn’t delved on for several years.

Cliffjumper’s death, and his failed attempt to join the Autobots.

“I was serious, you know,” he said, “about joining them, the Autobots. There was no place for me in the Decepticons anymore, not after that wretched Arachnid wormed her way into Megatron’s good books. And the Autobots seemed to cooperate and be content with each other’s presence. Arcee responded when that scout looked down on her attempt to terminate me. I admit, I would have never thought twice before terminating another, no matter how many disappointed or horrified looks I got.”.

At that Starscream’s frown deepened.

He had killed an Autobot without mercy, and as much as he willed himself, he still didn’t regret terminating Cliffjumper.

He no longer considered it a major achievement, due to more selfish reasons than actual distaste for his actions, but he didn’t feel guilty for having the mech’s Energon on his hands. It was only after he had been left at the mercy of Predacons, helpless and being held down as he was torn apart, that he no longer took joy in remembering that he inflicted that torment on another. But since he didn’t know Cliffjumper all that well, and he actually had a large distaste for the mech, he didn’t feel regret for his demise.

He was getting off-topic.

“I screwed up,” he said, chuckling bitterly, “I could have been one of them, won the war and not have to suffer the wrath of Predacons. But I and my big mouth had to ruin it. I just had to blurt out my so-called ‘achievement’ to the bot who called Cliffjumper her ‘partner’. How foolish of me. How… cruel of me.”.

He let that last part slip out unintentionally, partially shocked at his own words.

He was Starscream, a cold, calculative mech who used twisted lies and emotional manipulation to get his way. He would scheme and plan every little thing so that everything went the way he wanted. He’d killed many mechs without hesitation and had even tried to terminate his own master if it meant more power. He was greedy, cold-hearted and self-serving.

He knew this, and he relished it. Relished that others saw him this way because it made him feel as if he was recognized as something other than Megatron’s subordinate.

Starscream, the cold-calculated liar who rose to power through his schemes and held one of the highest positions in the Decepticon ranks. That’s how he wanted to be known.

Not as Starscream, the coward who Megatron beat senseless. Starscream, the lesser mech, who could never be Megatron.

And yet… he had admitted to his cruelty… and was not pleased with it. It was weird. All these years drifting through space in search of Megatron had left him feeling conflicted. Memories resurfaced, mostly regrets of his. He regretted things he didn’t think he ever would. Cliffjumper, of course, was one he didn’t care much for, but just the fact he seemed to no longer saw it as a triumph surprised him.

A sudden thought entered his head. “Do you think–?” he stopped himself there. He let out a dry chuckle instead. “No,” he said, “that’s a silly thought to have. That could never happen.”.

Starscream tried to ignore the small whisper in the back of his mind.

Could it?

Chapter Text

Fix-It was running, dragging Russell behind him. He’d just been face to face with one of the most notorious Decepticons in Cybertronian history, and he was in no way relishing the moment.

“Fix-It slow down!” Russell said.

“Slow down?! Slow down?!” Fix-It yelled, fright very evident in his voice, “we were just at the mercy of the Decepticon second in command, and you want me to slow down?! At any moment he could change his mind about letting us go and grind us into powder!”.

“But he let us go Fix-It!” Russell retorted, “why go through all the trouble of letting us go just to hunt us down again!”.

“Russell you don’t understand how dangerous that was!” Fix-It said sternly, “Starscream was a Decepticon known for trickery and treachery. Some considered him more dangerous than Megatron due to how well he could manipulate and twist everything to his favour. He gains the trust of bots and then stabs them in the back, and then he uses cowardly tactics to avoid termination. Megatron made him second in command for a reason, and it wasn’t because Starscream was a kind-hearted and honourable mech.”.

“B-but,” Russell tried to find something to say, but Fix-It paid him no attention, beginning to mumble in a frenzied panic.

“This is bad! This is really bad!” Fix-It said, pacing around in circles. “We need to tell the Lieutenant what happened,” Fix-It said, nodding curtly.

“But Starscream said he wanted to be left alone,” Russell interjected, “shouldn’t we leave him? He really looked like he wanted to be left alone.”.

“Russell, leaving Starscream alone can cause us a scrap ton of problems,” Fix-It argued back, “and we already have enough to worry about with Steeljaw and his pack. We don’t need the Decepticon second-in-command to terrorize Earth as well.”.

“But what if Starscream was telling the truth?!” Russell said, desperately trying to change the minicon’s mind, “what if he does just want to be left alone? What if he isn’t going to bother us?”.

The minicon shook his head.

“Russell, even with the slim chance that the biggest liar of all the Decepticons was telling the truth, Steeljaw could just as easily convince him to join their side,” he said, “remember just how easily he convinced all those other Cons to join him? He could offer Starscream something in return for joining him, and the next thing you know they’ve added another to their ranks. Starscream is too dangerous, too unpredictable to just leave to his own devices. We need to bring him in where he can’t harm anyone else ever again.”.

Russell wanted to argue back, but there seemed to be nothing else he could say. The minicon had made valid points with facts and evidence, while Russell was holding on to the slimmest of possibilities.

“Alright Fix-It,” Russell said defeatedly, “we’ll tell Bee about Starscream.”.

When the two returned to the scrapyard, they were flooded with questions.

“Where were you two? It’s been way too long for just a short trip to look for pods,” Sideswipe said, and Strongarm nodded.

“Fix-It, why didn’t you answer my comms?” Bumblebee said, concern showing on his face.

Fix-It and Russell glanced at each other. They both nodded.

“Well Lieutenant,” he stated, “there’s been a development. While I and Russell were scouting the area, my scanners picked up a foreign Decepticon signal in the woods.”.

“One of Steeljaw’s goons?” asked Sideswipe. To everyone’s surprise, Fix-it shook his head.

“Actually, the signal was not one that originated from any prisoner on the Alchemor,” he said, “and when I went to investigate, just checking if it was a glitch, I found a Decepticon warship.”.

Bumblebee’s eyes widened in shock, and Sideswipe’s mouth fell wide open.

“And I was ready to call back up until I realised Russell had entered the warship,” Fix-It said, “and I had to make sure Russell did not get into any trouble. And that’s when we ran into a Decepticon.”.

Bumblebee couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“A Decepticon?! In a warship?!” Bumblebee asked, a hint of panic in his voice.

No… there was no way either of them could be here, on Earth. Shockwave hadn’t been heard of in years, and Starscream had been… terminated by the Predacons. It couldn’t be them.

“Fix-It, did you manage to identify the Decepticon? Or anything that could lead us to recognize him?”.

“I actually managed to identify the Decepticon, and it was further confirmed by the con himself,” Fix-It said, “now this might come as a shock Lieutenant–”.

“Fix-It please tell me who it was,” Bumblebee interrupted. He needed to know his suspicion wasn’t true.

But what Fix-It said next only confirmed it.

“Starscream, Lieutenant,” he said, “the Decepticon was Starscream.”.

Bumblebee was speechless. Starscream… was alive? But the Predacons had returned from Dark Mount covered in his Energon, and Bumblebee remembered Darksteel and Skylynx chuckling about how the mech had lived up to his name and screamed like a sparkling.

But yet here Fix-It was, confirming he had been face to face with the former second-in-command.

“Starscream?!” Sideswipe yelled, “as in The Starscream?! Air Commander and Second in Command of the Decepticon Army?! Megatron’s right-hand bot?! That Starscream?!”.

Everyone gave him a look.

“What?!” Sideswipe said, raising his servos in defence, “he’s a big deal!”.

Strongarm mumbled something along the lines of Sideswipe being a ‘fan-bot’, to which the mech retorted with an ‘Am not!’.

Fix-It nodded. “Yes Sideswipe,” the minicon said, “that Starscream.”.

“How did you manage to escape?” Drift asked, his voice monotone and his expression unreadable.

Russel answered. “He let us go,” he said, “and he didn’t raise his weapons or threaten us at all.”.

When the words came out of Russell's mouth, Bumblebee nearly gasped. His eyes widened in shock, and his lip plates parted slightly.

"Starscream… Let you go?" Bumblebee asked, baffled.

Russell nodded.

"That's not like him," Bumblebee said, shaking his helm slightly, "Starscream wouldn't do anything unless he directly benefits from it. It doesn't make any sense.".

"What if Starscream let them go to track down our base?" Grimlock asked, trying to help come up with a reason for the Decepticon's odd actions.

Strongarm shook her head. "Negative," she said, "if he wanted to find us he could have just used Russell and Fix-It as bait or bargain material to lure us in and trap us.".

Denny came forward, looking up at Bumblebee. "What if this Starscream guy just let them go for the sake of it?" he asked.

Bumblebee wanted to yell at him that he was crazy but reminded himself that Denny had never confronted Starscream or heard about the Decepticon at all. He shook his head instead.

"There's no way," he said, not willing to believe that possibility, "Starscream only cares about himself. He's self-serving and uncaring. He has to have some ulterior motive for letting you go.".

Bumblebee took a step forward, making sure all eyes were on him for his next statement. "And now that we are aware of Starscream's presence, he's too dangerous to be left alone," he stated, "we have to go after him and capture him.".

Russell wanted to argue.

"But Bee," he started, hoping he could at least change Bumblebee's mind, "Starscream said he wanted to be left alone, and he looked really sad. Maybe you should just leave him alone. Maybe he won't hurt anyone.".

Bumblebee looked Russell in the eyes, seeing genuine hope for the Decepticon. Bee felt bad he had to crush that hope.

He kneeled until he and Russell were nearly face to face. "Russell," he said, his expression serious but understanding, "I know you mean well, and you are trying to see the good in Starscream. But you don't know him as I do. The things he's done, the lives he's taken… He can't be trusted. We have to make sure he can never hurt anyone else ever again.".

At that, he remembered Cliffjumper. Starscream always gloated about killing his friend, and he was disgusted about how he used it as a badge of honour. They'd given Starscream a chance before, and he'd denied it and sided with the Cons when the time came.

Russell looked down, clearly upset by Bumblebee's statement. Fix-It came up behind him, putting a servo on his back to reassure him. Bumblebee stood up and addressed the members of his team.

"Autobots," he began.

Sideswipe rolled his eyes, and Strongarm shoved him slightly. "Let's seek out a seeker!" he said, posing dramatically and pointing.

Silence.

"Another epic fail," Sideswipe mumbled. "Get it?" Bee said, desperately trying to save the situation, "Because Starscream used to be an Energon… Seeker?". No one reacted.

"Alright just transform please," Bee said defeatedly. His team transformed and raced off towards the coordinates provided by Fix-It.

Chapter Text

"Hello, Bumblebee," Starscream said, fidgeting with his digits, "so, uh, I know you must be surprised to see me here. But uh, I, uh, I was uh, wondering if, uh, well you see, I uh, the thing is that I want to uh, change, you know? Like, to be good. I mean I thought I was good before, but now I realize I was bad. But, uh, anyways, you see I also have experience in flight and am a pretty good fighter in the sky. I mean you've seen me… when I was attacking you and destroying your base… yeah I should apologize for that. But I was wondering if this time, you would allow me to join… the Autobots.". He squeezed him optics shut, slightly peeking one open.

The small fluffy winged creature cooed, tilting its head at an angle.

"Well?!" he said, "What's your answer?!".

Promptly, the creature flew onto his helm and began pecking at it before flying off.

Starscream sagged.

"Yeah," he said disheartened, "I think that would be my answer as well.". He growled in frustration, kicking at a tree. "Who am I kidding?!" he yelled, dropping to the ground, "like they'd buy that. From any other Con, maybe. But from me? They'd probably get a good laugh before tossing me into the first prison ship back to Cybertron. I knew this was stupid.".

Starscream tried to think.

He had a way with words, he could weave anything he wanted, make grandiose speeches loaded with lies, but now that he was being honest he sounded like a buffoon. How did Knockout manage to gain their trust?

Immediately after that thought, Starscream felt a pang of pain in his spark.

Knockout… the medic had been the closest thing Starscream had had as a friend on the Nemesis. And then… something else. It was weird. Starscream didn't get 'feelings'. So like everyone else, he pushed Knockout away. And he had managed to push him all the way to the other faction. That was another thing he found himself regretting. Why did he always push away those who wanted to help him? What was his malfunction?

He shook his head.

It was getting late. He should return to the ship, he didn't want to chase out any more of those furry four-legged earth creatures out of his ship. He got up and began walking back to his ship. He convinced himself to work on his 'redemption speech' (more like him trying not to get beaten to death by reasonably angry Autobots). He also hoped that Arcee wasn't on Earth. Then he really wouldn't have a chance. Not after what happened back near the Harbinger.

He sighed, staring up at the sky. There were stars, millions of them. They dotted the dark sky, brightening it in a mesmerising way. He missed the sky. Missed the thrill he felt as the wind would whip past him and how he could see everything. He had been stripped of flight once, when those humans had stolen his T-Cog, and now he was grounded once more. He missed flying, it was one of the things he enjoyed the most. During the war, there were moments where he could get away and just fly off into the night sky. Megatron didn't exactly care much about the seeker, and any time he suspected Starscream of plotting against him he'd simply let Soundwave investigate it. After all, he wasn't 'worth' Megatron's time.

He scowled.

Starscream still hated his former master for how he treated him. He told himself if he ever saw Megatron again, he would get revenge. But he just wouldn't search for him. He'd just wait and see. Like he always did. In the meantime, he had to focus on finding a way to convince Bumblebee that he wanted to join their team. Starscream acknowledges his flaws, that he has committed terrible crimes, and that Bumblebee will hate him for it.

He was used to being hated.

But if he could find redemption, if he could find a way to regret and repent, maybe, just maybe he could be better. He could wrench away these ideas he had instilled while in the Decepticon ranks. If he tried to redeem himself, he could be happy. And now, that’s all Starscream wanted. Happiness, and eventually, acceptance.

Chapter Text

There were millions of questions going through Bumblebee’s head. How had Starscream survived? What had he been doing all this time? Why was he on Earth? And most importantly, why did he let Russell and Fix-It go? It felt out of character, unlike anything the Decepticon second-in-command would do.

Bee was even wondering if maybe, just maybe, Russell was right and Starscream had a change of heart.

No, he thought, there has to be something else.

Bee just couldn’t admit it. After all Starscream had but him and Team Prime through, Bumblebee could not let it slide. Starscream murdered Cliffjumper without sparing another thought, and he cared about no one. Any time he helped them, it was only for his own benefit. There wasn’t a shred of good in that mech. And all Bee wanted was to lock Starscream away so he couldn’t harm another Bot ever again.

He shook out of these thoughts. They weren’t important right now. Finding Starscream was.

“Are we there yet?” Sideswipe groaned, “we’ve been driving forever. Jeez just where did this guy park his ship?”.

Bumblebee transformed back, landing on his pedes. The rest of his team transformed back, except for Grimlock. He checked the coordinates again and saw they were nearly there.

“Not far from here,” he said, then motioned for his team to follow him.

They trudged through the forest, weapons raised and battle masks snapped tightly over lip plates. Bumblebee looked past a tree, eyes widening in shock at the sight of a warship nearly as large as the Nemesis. And in that ship was Starscream. Bee looked back at his team, battle mask retracting.

“Okay team, here’s what we’ll do,” he said, “we get in quietly, make sure Starscream doesn’t notice us, find him, and then we capture him. Understood?”.

His team nodded, and Bee pressed on, walking towards the warship. He put one pede down on the ship’s stairs, and when nothing happened, he began cautiously walking up the stairs. His team followed suit, their pedes treading lightly on the metal. Soon, Bumblebee stepped into the ship.

It looked just like the Nemesis, ever so menacing. But it also felt… lonely. Bee snapped out of it, walking into the ship and motioning for his team to do the same.

“Alright team,” he said, “We should split up to cover more ground.”.

“Strongarm, Drift and Grimlock, you three check the rooms closer to the command centre. Sideswipe, you and I will check the rooms closer to the entrance. If you hear anything, comm me immediately. Starscream isn’t your average Decepticon. He’s slippery and tricky. If we lose him now, we may never get the chance to bring him to justice.”. His team nodded, and they split.

Bumblebee’s helm turned to the right, and he saw a dark grey door. He motioned Sideswipe, who nodded and snapped his battle mask over his faceplate. Bumblebee pressed the button next to the wall, and the door hissed open.

Then, Sideswipe screamed.

Bee barely had time to register the image in front of him when Sideswipe let out a screech of pure terror. He turned his head towards Sideswipe, looking at the horrified mech.

Sideswipe looked back at Bumblebee, shaking his helm and out of his daze. “Sorry about that,” he said, “but…”.

“I know,” Bee said, “that was quite a shock for me too.”.

He turned his helm back to look at the scene before him. Starscream's torn chassis was laid on a medical berth, and the damage made the Energon in Bumblebee grow cold.

It had several deep gashes strewn across its chest plate, profound indentations that looked like bite marks were on the mech’s legs, and Bee saw one of the legs was bent in an unnatural position. Starscream’s right optic had also been clawed out, and…

by Primus his wings.

The thing Starscream had prided himself over the most, his wings, had been torn, bent, broken, ripped apart. One of the smaller wings had been snapped in half, and one of the larger wings had a large chunk missing, and judging by the dentate marks the wing must have been bitten off.

Bumblebee was horrified.

So this is what the Predacons had done to Starscream. Two emotions welled up inside him he never thought he’d feel for the seeker.

Pity and guilt.

The pain he must have endured… it didn’t feel right. Even for someone as cold-hearted as Starscream. But if his chassis was here…

He didn’t have time to delve into the theory as he heard his commlink activate. “Lieutenant,” Strongarm said, “you might want to come to the command centre.”. “Understood, me and Sideswipe are on our way.”. Bumblebee walked away from the medbay, sparing one last glance back at the torn chassis before heading towards the command centre.

When they arrived, they saw Strongarm and Drift near a command console, while Grimlock was looking around corners, as if Starscream would jump out of nowhere.

“What is it, Strongarm?” he asked.

“Well sir,” she started, “we managed to enter the command console without triggering alarms, and found something of interest in the console.”.

“It appears that Starscream has kept a series of recordings,” Drift said, “and they seem like a log.”.

“Play me a recording,” Bumblebee said, eyeing the command console.

Drift nodded, pressing a button. Immediately, an audio box popped up, and Starscream’s voice came out of it.

“Log date 13: It has been 13 solar cycles since I have left Cybertron and have begun to search.”

Starscream sounded confident in the recording, his voice somewhat robotic. “There is no sign of my former master just yet, but I must remain patient. I know that sooner or later, Megatron will slip up. And I’ll be there to make sure he stays down, permanently.”

That sent a small chill down Bumblebee’s spine. So Starscream was searching for Megatron so that he could kill him. Bee didn’t know why that surprised him, but it probably had to do with the seeker’s outburst back when Bumblebee had killed Megatron. The seeker had sworn vengeance and had to be held back by Shockwave before he did anything reckless.

But Bumblebee just suspected Starscream was back to his old ways. As usual.

“Then, I will cement my reign as the true leader of the Decepticons, and gather our forces to reclaim Cybertron. Now I must check to make sure the ship is in order. That’s the one downside to being alone. You have to do everything yourself, but then again I always did other bot’s work eh? Starscream out.”

Bumblebee knew it. Starscream was back to his old tricks. Bumblebee shouldn’t have felt shocked, but he did. At least now he knew. Starscream was always a power-hungry, selfish, cold-hearted and greedy Decepticon. Nothing had changed. Once a Con, Bumblebee thought, always a Con.

“This recording proves it,” Bumblebee said, “Starscream is a threat to Cybertron, and he must be captured at all costs.”

There was a clang behind him. Every bot turned around towards the entrance to the command centre. There stood a mech, bright red eyes wide in shock, lip plates pressed tightly together. And on each of his wings, was stamped the purple logo of the Decepticons.

“Well, uh,” the Decepticon said, with a voice Bumblebee instantly recognized, “I see you’re already here. So, uh, Bumblebee, nice to see you again?”.

Bumblebee pulled out his weapon and shot in Starscream’s direction.

The seeker yelled, jumping out of the way and leaving a scorch mark where the blast registered. Starscream did what he did best. He ran.

“After him!” Bumblebee shouted, breaking into a run, his team following suit.

They were fast, but Starscream was faster. He reached the end of the corridor, immediately punching the button next to the ship doors. He leapt and rolled down the stairs as they began to go up. He did one final jump, landing on the grass harshly.

Bumblebee tried to catch up, but the doors snapped shut right in front of him. He banged his servos on the door, trying to open it. No such luck.
Meanwhile, back outside, Starscream got back up and ran deep into the woods.

With his servos clenched and his optics squeezed shut, Bumblebee let out a yell of frustration.

Chapter Text

The scrapyard was quiet. Too quiet. As his eyes scanned the perimeter, there wasn’t an Autobot or Dinobot in sight. Perfect. He looked back at the rest of his team, a smirk on his faceplates. 

“It appears the Autobots aren’t home,” he said, “and I think we have waited long enough to make our move.”. 

“Slaggin’ finally!” the horned Decepticon yelled, rolling his optics, “thought we’d never go through with dis plan of yours Steeljaw!”. 

Steeljaw chuckled. “Patience is key, brother.”.

Thunderhoof grunted, crossing his arms. “Let’s just get dis show on the run.”. 

Steeljaw grinned, pointing at the scrapyard. “You know the plan. And this time we won’t need bait to lure them out.”. 

The other Decepticons red optics glinted in the darkness, and they all grinned. This was too easy.

… 

He panted, slowing down to halt. He took in deep breaths, turning to look behind him. No one. He dropped to his knees letting out a cry of frustration. He pounded his fists into the ground, shaking it vigorously. 

“What the frag was wrong with me?!” he yelled angrily, “oh hello Bumblebee, it’s me, the Decepticon who terminated your friend and tried to kill you on several occasions. So how’s the weather? Stupid!”. 

He crashed to the floor, and let out a groan. “Now they’ll definitely try to scrap me,” he said, “I’m such a coward. I shouldn’t have run. I should have destroyed those entries, never should have kept the damn log in the first place!”. 

He screamed, and then he began to cry. “It’s just like last time!” he wailed, but soon it was reduced to a soft sniffle, “why do I mess everything up?”. 

Megatron was right. Starscream was a curse, always bringing bad luck to him and those who he surrounded himself with. Without Megatron guiding him, he was useless. Maybe… he should– 

He stopped there. He shook his helm. 

“No,” he said, slowly getting up, “Megatron made his choice. And I need to make mine.”. Starscream decided at that moment to wait. He couldn’t rush into anything at this moment.

He needed a plan. He had to know what he needed to do. 

Think , he thought. 

Bumblebee wouldn’t be able to break through the doors. And even if he tried to hack through it, it would take him a few hours. That gave Starscream time . And he would put it to good use. 

When he’d first arrived on this planet, he’d mapped his surroundings by going on walks. He was pretty sure he’d gone east. Which meant that place was nearby. He never went before due to all the human activity, but now it didn’t seem like he had much of a choice. He needed that. It could be what determined whether or not the Autobots would consider his use. Now that he’d formulated a plan, he sped off into action, running off into the shadows.

Chapter Text

Bumblebee slammed into the door. The sound vibrated through the ship, making the rest of his team wince. 

“This is going nowhere,” he said, shaking himself off and standing straight. He activated his COMM and tried to contact Fix-It. 

“Fix-It, Starscream escaped and we’re stuck on his ship. Can you find his signal anywhere?”. 

Static was his response. 

“Fix-it?” he asked again, his worry escalating, “Fix-It respond.”. 

He was once again greeted by static. 

“We need to get back to base,” he stated, worry evident in his voice, “I have a bad feeling about this.”. 

He looked at the members of his team and noticed one was missing. 

“Where’s Sideswipe?” he asked. Primus, he didn’t need this right now. 

“Yo check this out! Energon!” came Sideswipe’s voice from one of the rooms, and Bumblebee ran towards it. 

When he entered, sure enough, there were stacks of the blue cubes lying around the room, and Sideswipe stood there grinning. 

“That’s a small stock of Energon for a massive ship like this,” Strongarm said when she entered the room. 

“Well old Screamer won’t be needing it anyway,” Sideswipe said, picking up a few of the cubes. 

“We can come back for the cubes after we make sure Fix-It, Denny and Russell are okay,” he said, “Starscream won’t come back for the ship if he doesn’t know we’ve left it.”. 

Sideswipe rolled his optics but obeyed as he put the cubes back down. 

“Okay, okay, sheesh,” he said, crossing his arms as he stormed out of the room. 

Bumblebee and Strongarm followed him back out to the hall towards the doors. Strongarm looked up at her lieutenant. He had a grim expression, lost in thought. 

“Sir, is everything alright?” she asked him. 

He looked down at her, shaking his helm. 

“Yes,” he said, “it’s just Starscream. I can’t believe we just let him fly off like that. We could’ve done something. We could have taken him into custody then and there and avoided this whole mess.”. 

“You’re not just talking about Starscream’s escape and us being trapped here, are you lieutenant?” she asked, and Bumblebee’s optics widened, before a sombre and even guilty look replaced his shock. 

“I had no idea what the Predacons intended to do when they flew off in pursuit of Starscream,” he confessed, “but seeing the damage done to his old body… it just wasn’t right. Even for a mech as horrible as Starscream. No one deserved that kind of pain.”.

Strongarm looked away, contemplating Bumblebee’s answer.

“Look, this is great and all,” Sideswipe said, breaking the silence, “but do we have an actual plan other than yeeting ourselves at a door?”. 

Bumblebee gave Sideswipe a confused look. “Yeet?”.

“Russell said it meant throw or something like that,” Sideswipe answered, shrugging.

Bumblebee shuddered. The red bot had been spending too much time with Russell. 

“So…?” Sideswipe said.

“So what?” Strongarm said, putting both servos on her hips. 

“The plan! Duh!” Sideswipe snapped, throwing his servos in the air, “or are we just going to vibe in a Decepticon ship?!”.

Vibe? Bumblebee would’ve asked, but he knew better than to do so.

He shook his helm. They were wasting time.

“We need to find a way out,” he said, “maybe if we combine our strength and hit the door just strong enough, we could get it open.”.  

Sideswipe’s optics nearly rolled into his head. But whatever.

The five mechs took a few steps back from the door, all waiting for Bumblebee’s signal. 

“Now!” the mech said. 

All five Autobots ran, energy coursing through them. Then they all slammed into the door.

It opened.

Then the team rolled out and hit the ground with a series of thuds. 

A collection of groans was heard, and the team slowly onlined their optics to find the ship doors closing again. That was weird. But Bumblebee gave no time for theories.

“Come on,” he said groggily, as he got to his pedes, “we need to make sure Fix-It and the humans are okay.”. 

They slowly nodded, the impact of the fall still dazing them. Then, they transformed into vehicle mode and sped towards the scrapyard.

Chapter Text

They got to the scrapyard. 

Transforming they ran towards the base but halted when they felt a sharp pain consume their chassis. Yells of pain echoed throughout the scrapyard, alerting the Decepticons that the Autobots had returned. 

Steeljaw grinned, walking away from the humans and towards the entrance of the scrapyard. 

The pain was unbearable, and Bumblebee felt like it would snap him in half if he kept pushing against it. He stumbled backwards, his teammates doing the same. The pain disappeared and was replaced with a dull ache in their processors. 

“I see you’ve become acquainted with our new doorbell,” said a voice, which Bee identified as Steeljaw’s, “I would’ve set it to destroy you, but we didn’t have enough Energon to make that possible.”. 

Bumblebee opened his optics, growling and clenching his servos into fists. He ran at the forcefield one more time but collapsed when the searing pain wracked his systems. Steeljaw’s smirk widened, drumming his clawed digits against his hip. This was fun.

Bumblebee had to retreat, panting and huffing from the aftermath of the forcefield. 

“And don’t bother trying to turn off your Audio receptors,” Steeljaw sneered, “this subsonic forcefield affects all your systems, not just auditory. You must not underestimate me so much Bumblebee.”. 

Bee narrowed his optics and clenched his dental plates. He resisted the urge to throw himself at Steeljaw, knowing that it wouldn’t do any good. 

Steeljaw locked eyes with the yellow Autobot, making sure the bot understood there was no getting around this. It was useless. Steeljaw had won. 

“Drop your weapons and hand them over,” he said, “after all, I would hate to have to resort to harming your little pets.”.

The Autobots glanced at their Decepticon hunters, but complied and threw them into the scrapyard. 

Knowing the Autobots were no longer a threat to him, he left the weapons where they were before making his exit.

Bumblebee looked back at the members of his team. “We will find a way in,” he said, “we’re not going to stop until we find a way in.”.

“And, uh, how are we going to do that?” Sideswipe asked, raising an optical ridge.

“Good point,” was Bumblebee’s response, “I have no idea.”.

… 

Well trying to dig their way indefinitely didn’t work. And they didn’t have a giant ladder to climb over it. Great. They were back to square one.

“There has to be a way in,” Bumblebee said, “we just need to find out how.”. 

“Maybe we could fly over it,” Sideswipe said sarcastically. 

Bumblebee gave him a look. He wasn’t in the mood for Sideswipe’s antics.

He was about to scold him, but a noise made him stop in his tracks. 

The sound was a jet’s turbine. And it was close. Too close.

Scrap.

Bumblebee spun around, and his optics widened when he saw a silver and red jet heading straight for them.

He got into a defensive stance, cursing the fact he was weaponless. He could try to block Starscream, but the Decepticon could just throw him into the air and let him come crashing down. Not a good idea.

But before the jet could hit him, Starscream transformers and landed gracefully on his pedes. He slowly rose, red optics meeting blue ones. There was a small smirk on his lips when he saw the bots staring at him with wide optics. 

“It looked like you could use some help,” he said, gesturing towards the scrapyard, “and I think given your predicament, my abilities could be of use to you,”.

Bumblebee raised his servos, and the seeker suppressed the urge to laugh. If this bot thought he could take him in the servo to servo combat, he was terribly mistaken.

“You can lower your servos Bumblebee,” he said, “I’m not here for a fight.”.

No one lowered their servos. Starscream wasn’t surprised.

“What do you want Starscream?” Bumblebee said.

“Simple,” Starscream said, shrugging, “you need to get past that forcefield, but you can’t fly. I can.”.

Bumblebee was beyond confused.

“You want to help us?” Sideswipe said, weary. Bumblebee said Starscream was a trickster, so he wasn’t going to take any chances.

Starscream nodded, folding his arms over his cockpit. 

“Oh yeah?” Bumblebee said, narrowing his optics, “and what do you want in return?”.

Starscream took a deep breath, a sense of Deja Vu overtaking his senses.

He quickly shook out of it. It was different this time, he wouldn’t fail. He could do this.

“I want to be,” he paused for a second, before finishing his sentence, “on your side.”.

Chapter Text

The words were like a punch to the face. The last time Starscream said those words, it ended with Arcee having a large gash on her side and Starscream running away and becoming neutral. And then he rejoined Megatron.

“What?!” Bumblebee yelled, “you think I’m going to fall for that trick a second time?!”. 

His response received a shocked look from his other team members. A second time?

Starscream sighed. “Look,” he started, “I know you have no reason to trust me, but I swear that I want to change this time. For once in my life, I swear I’m not lying. I want to be on your side.”.

“No,” Bumblebee snapped, “you just want to keep yourself out of prison! You haven’t changed, you can’t change. You’re Starscream, you killed Cliffjumper!”.

He pointed at Starscream, anger boiling inside of him. The rest of his team members looked at their leader, then at the seeker. They felt caught up in something that didn’t involve them.

“You’re a cold-hearted and selfish Decepticon,” the yellow Autobot growled, “and you’ll never change. Once a Decepticon, always a Decepticon.”.

“What about Knockout?”.

The question took Bumblebee aback. Knockout. The medic had switched sides at the end of the war, and if memory served him correctly, was working with Ratchet here on Earth with the base. Everyone had been wary of his change at the beginning, and the medic himself had confessed his change had been for selfish reasons, but over time the medic had changed drastically, adopting the Autobot code and agreeing that all life should be protected. He had made the change. He went from a Decepticon to an Autobot.

He looked straight at Starscream, straight into those red optics. And saw… no malice. He just looked tired. Very, very tired. His frown was loose, no scowl present. It was strange. Bumblebee didn’t like it.

“Knockout didn’t kill Cliffjumper,” he growled, clenching his servos. 

There was raw pain in his voice, and Starscream could feel it. Had he been the same mech from fifteen stellar cycles ago, he would have laughed, smirked and basked in his pain. But not anymore. Now, he didn’t know what to do.

He looked down an almost guilty look on his face. 

“Yes,” he said, “I did. I killed your friend.”. 

Bumblebee grit his denta. Here it comes… 

“And I know you hate me for it.”.

That was not what he was expecting. He expected a boast, an excuse, something along the lines of ‘it was in the past’. 

Then Starscream did something completely unexpected.

The seeker kneeled down, bowing his head and extending his servos forward, servos clenched.

“But if you won’t take me as an ally,” he said, “you can take me as a prisoner. Just let me help you at least.”. 

Bumblebee looked down at the seeker, optics wide.

Starscream had surrendered.

Chapter Text

Bumblebee wanted to deny it.

He wanted to blast Starscream in the face and tell him to get lost.

But Starscream had surrendered, and was on his knees with his servos extended in defeat.

He had wanted to capture Starscream, but now that he was surrendering he wanted him gone. He wanted to chase him off, but he reminded himself of their current situation.

They were locked out of their base without weapons or a plan. And a seeker with expert combat skills, weapons, and flight capability had just shown up on a silver platter, and had asked they accept his surrender in return, knowing full well he’d be sent to prison for the rest of his function.

Bumblebee couldn’t turn that away, not at this moment where they so desperately needed someone like Starscream.

He turned around to look at his teammates, and then back at the kneeling seeker.

“I will discuss with my team,” he said, “then I’ll tell you whether we accept your surrender or not.”.

Starscream nodded, unmoving.

Bumblebee turned around, walking in the direction of his team. He knew he shouldn’t turn his back on Starscream, and so he spared a few glances backward. The seeker was still kneeling, but his servos were crossed on his knees. He turned back, looking at each of his teammates.

“I’m leaving the decision up to you,” he said, “should we accept Starscream’s terms or not?”.

Sideswipe spoke first. “Bee think about it,” he started, “Starscream was the Air Commander of the ‘Cons during the war, he can fight in the sky for Primus sake! And we currently have no plan and no weapons. I think it’s safe to say we most definitely need him.”.

His eyes moved to Strongarm. She nodded.

“For once I agree with Sideswipe,” she said, ignoring the dirty look she got from the red mech, “Starscream is a tactical advantage we can’t afford to lose. If he joined Steeljaw’s pack, our troubles would multiply. So accepting his help and surrender seems like the best course of action.”.

Bumblebee looked at Grimlock. The Dinobot, turned his head around, but soon realized the yellow bot was asking for his opinion.

“Well uh,” he started, “shouldn’t we at least give him a tiny chance? Besides he can fly.”.

Finally, the Autobot leader turned to Drift, a small part of him desperately hoping the bot would disagree with the others.

“If Starscream wishes to change sides,” he started, “and is offering his services, it would be most foolish not to consider them.”.

That small flicker died. His team all agreed Starscream was more valuable as an ally than as an enemy, and Bumblebee had left the decision up to them. He took a deep breath, turning around and walking back to where Starscream was still kneeling.

“My team and I…” he started, then clenched his servos before continuing, “accept your terms of surrender.”.

Starscream looked back up, bewildered. Then, he had to hold himself back before he began leaking lubricant. They’d said yes.

He got up almost immediately, stopping himself from grinning with glee.

“But after you help us,” Bee started, looking back at him with narrowed optics, “you go straight into a stasis pod. Understood?”.

Part of Starscream felt disappointed, but he reminded himself that he did surrender. And if that meant being stuck in a stasis pod, then so be it. At least he could prove his use. At least he could do something properly.

“I won’t let you down,” Starscream said, biting back the urge to say ‘Master’, “I promise.”.

He was just glad to have a purpose again. He was glad to serve.

Chapter Text

Bumblebee gave Starscream a weary glance, not liking the seeker’s behaviour. He was too cheery for someone who had just surrendered. But he snapped out of his thoughts. They had more important things to worry about.

Bumblebee nodded, walking away. Starscream trailed behind him, hunching his shoulders and making himself appear smaller. 

“Even with your advantage of flight, the group of Cons are a lot larger and are too strong for any of us to fight alone,” he said, “so we need to come up with a plan. This barrier affects Autobots and Dinobots, so we can’t get through.”

“Do you have any Minicons?” Starscream asked, which made Bumblebee raise an optic ridge.

“Yes,” he said, “why are you asking?”.

“Do you know if the forcefield affects Minicons?” he asked, raising a servo.

Bumblebee wanted to smack himself on the faceplates. Why didn’t he think of that?

Starscream read the other’s expression, and nearly smirked. Bumblebee noticed, narrowing his optics.

“We don’t,” he spoke, almost a hiss, “we haven’t tested it out yet. But I guess we could try it”.

With that sentence, Drift detached Jetstorm and Slipstream, and the minicons landed on their feet. They looked up, almost shrinking back when they saw the giant seeker looking down at them with red optics. They glanced back up at their Master, who looked down at them. The two minicons looked away.

Starscream said nothing. He kept his optics on his part-time ‘ally’. 

“Here’s the plan,” he started, but stopped when they all heard the sound of small footsteps and loud panting. Bumblebee turned around, and found Russell running towards them from the ledge of the scrapyard entrance. 

The boy huffed, stopping in front of the mechs and holding his abdomen as he tried to catch his breath. He looked up, and saw not seven, but eight mechs staring back at him. And one was Starscream. 

The Decepticon simply looked at him in confusion, but didn't scream out accusations or anything of the sort, like everyone thought he would. He simply nodded, acknowledging his presence before returning his gaze to Bumblebee. 

"Russel," the yellow Autobot said, snapping the boy out of his train of thought, "are you okay?".

"Those Decepti-creeps have my dad!" he said, staring at Bee with worried eyes, "I managed to get away but they got him! Please you have to save him!". 

Bumblebee looked at him, and nodded. "We have a plan," he said, "Starscream is going to fly over the forcefield and cause a distraction, while we find a different route to send Jetstorm and Slipstream in. They'll deactivate the barrier and we go in. Then we stop the Cons.".

He twisted his head, and stared into Starscream with a hard glare. “And then you go in a stasis pod,” he said, narrowing his optics further.

Starscream gulped. He’d go in the pod, as much as he’d rather not. He’d made a deal with them, and he had to honour it. And maybe, just maybe, if he was useful enough, they might reconsider. So he nodded.

Russell looked at the two mechs, confused at this strange agreement. A small part wanted to argue, but he might just make things worse. So he kept his mouth shut. 

“Does everyone understand the plan?” Bumblebee asked. Every mech nodded. “Then let’s go.”.

With that command, Starscream leapt into the air and transformed, jet engine roaring to life as he took off. He spiralled into the sky, taking a graceful turn and flying straight over the barrier. 

“Now that,” Sideswipe said while pointing at the jet, “was awesome.”.

Chapter Text

Steeljaw was getting concerned. For quite some time now, there was a jet circling above them, and it hadn’t come down or left. It couldn’t be an Autobot. Autobots couldn’t fly. But why would an Earth plane be circling over some measly scrapyard in the middle of nowhere? He didn’t know which course of action to take. He was more occupied with making the damned minicon open the stasis pods. 

But this could prove to be a problem. 

“Fracture can you shoot that jet down?” he said, “it’s starting to piss me off.”.

The bounty hunter shrugged, giving a curt nod before transforming his hand into a blaster and firing in direction of the jet. Just then, the jet doged the blast and swerved right at them. That was definitely not a human plane.

They were under fire very quickly. The ship fired round after round of blasts, and all the Cons were struggling to dodge. Steeljaw growled, then yelped when a blast hit him on his pede. He looked back up at the jet, roaring before leaping at it.

The seeker wanted to scoff. Amateur move. 

He rammed into the Decepticon and flew all the way up, then twisted away from the Decepticon and let him plummet down. He would’ve let it at that, but a growl stopped him.

“Starscream.” Bumblebee growled into the comm, and the seeker would’ve rolled his eyes if he was in bot mode.

“Don’t fret about it,” the con said, flying back down and transforming. 

He barely grabbed the con’s pede before he smashed into the ground. 

Then, in one swift movement, he flung the Wolficon at another Decepticon, wincing slightly at the loud sound that echoed when they collided with one another. He transformed again before he hit the ground, flying up shortly before returning to bot mode and landing on his pedes.

Steeljaw shook out of his shock, groaning slightly before getting back up and looking at his attacker. The bot’s elite flight skills must’ve ment he was a Seeker, and from the two purple insignias on his wings, he was a Decepticon. His confusion grew.

“Brother,” he started, about to approach but stopped in his tracks when the seeker activated his blasters.

“I’m not your brother,” he spat, red optics narrowing.

“And yet you wear a Decepticon insignia,” Steeljaw retorted, hoping he could convince this bot to lower his weapons, but grew puzzled when the seeker laughed.

“Oh please,” he said, “this is a proper insignia, still attached to the true meaning on the Decepticons, not what you criminals have turned my cause into.”. 

Ah, so this was one of the Decepticons from the war. Something about the way the bot said ‘my’ made Steeljaw’s optics widened in shock.

“Are you–?” he started, but was interrupted. “Megatron? Hardly. Megatron was a coward who abandoned my cause long ago.”.

“So you must be Starscream,” he said, “but then, why attack us? We are on your side?”.

With that came another spurt of bitter laughter from the mech. 

“You don’t know me very well do you?” the seeker said, charging his blaster and firing at the Wolficon. He missed on purpose, managing to send the con back a few feet due to the impact of the blast. He toppled over the other mech, both falling with a crash. 

“I was known best in the Decepticons not for my rank nor my elite flight skills,” Starscream said, “though that came close second. No, I was known for one of my most unique qualities no other Decepticon possessed.”.

“Which is?”

He smirked, pointing a blaster straight at him. 

“My treachery and knack for being a turncoat.”.

At that moment, everything clicked for Steeljaw. The seeker had switched sides.

Chapter Text

“Now!” Starscream yelled, and on command, something red zoomed past them and began bouncing off of several objects before transforming and landing on the command console. A minicon.

Scrap.

Before he could do anything, he was sent into a large shelf of junk, crashing and smashing the objects stacked on it. The seeker had kicked him, and barely gave Steeljaw time to recover from the blow (and the shock) by throwing himself at the Wolficon. The seeker tackled the grounder, claws raking his chestplate. Steelajw flailed his arms, trying to land a blow on the seeker, but was unable to. Things were not going as planned. 

Starscream heard the second minicon ricochet off and into the command console, but focused his attention on the Decepticon he was currently attacking. His claws made large scratches, and although none were deep enough to cut energon lines, they were very sharp and painful. He didn’t know whether the minicons had succeeded or not, but he couldn’t get distracted. As a (sort of former) Con himself, he knew just how slippery one could be. So he couldn’t afford to be distracted.

The Wolficon growled, managing to grab one of the seeker’s arms and fling him off. Starscream landed on his back with a harsh thud, but recovered quickly and jumped to his pedes before the mech could smash his helm in. But he wasn’t quick enough to turn around, because seconds later a pede slammed into his waist. He stumbled and crashed down onto the ground, growling in anger. 

“How dare you side with the Autobots over your own kind?!” the Decepticon snarled, but he yelped when a punch landed on his snout. 

“No, how do you dare you call yourself a Decepticon?!” Starscream roared, “you are a dingy little criminal! You don’t give two flying frags about our cause, about what we endured to keep our ideals alive! Every moment you brandish that insignia, you throw dirt on mech’s like me! Every time you call yourself one of us, a true Decepticon turns in their grave!”.  

He leapt at the mech, throwing an uppercut and making the Wolficon lose his balance. He planted another good kick on the other’s waist, sending him flying. His opponent spluttered, growling. 

“A true Decepticon?!” he yelled, “if you are supposedly the ‘true’ Decepticon Leader, then lead us!”.

“You want me to lead?! Fine!” Starscream snarled, “then as Leader of the Decepticons, I order you to stand down!”.

The Wolficon howled in anger, swiping his claws wildly at Starscream. The seeker caught a servo, then punched the other’s arm and sent a shockwave through the other’s chassis. The Wolficon yelped in pain, and Starscream threw him across the scrapyard. 

“This is your problem!” the seeker yelled, “you only listen to an order if it’s the one you want to hear! Well that’s not how it works! You are no Decepticon, you’re a mockery!”.

Steeljaw wanted to rip Starscream in half. He exploded in a fuming rage, not even bothering to calculate his attacks as he threw random punches and swipes at the seeker. 

Starscream dodged with ease, not even trying at this point. Starscream really had a talent for bringing the worst out in mech’s. He frowned, momentarily distracted. He always brought the worst out in mech’s… 

In that moment’s hesitation, Steeljaw saw an opening. But not against the seeker. A few seconds ago, Bumblebee had barged through and was now withing Steeljaw’s range. He smirked, and leapt at the startled yellow autobot instead.

Starscream’s optics widened in shock.

The wolficon’s claws were extended, ready to slash through the Autobot.

Frag it all. 

At the last moment, Starscream shoved Bumblebee out of the way, and let out a pained yell as claws raked through his exposed protoform. 

Immediately, he fell to the floor, clutching his abdomen from where Steeljaw had injured him. He felt warm liquid slip through his digits. Oh scrap he was leaking Energon.

He groaned in pain, but soon yelped when a sharp kick found it’s way into his wound. He curled up, trying his best to protect his weaker parts from the onslaught of kicks. He wasn’t succeeding. Every kick made the wound larger, leaking more and more Energon.

Starscream froze. He was going to bleed out.

– Predaking’s claws ripped his leg apart, screams of agony ringing throughout Darkmount – 

He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to push the memory far back.

– bit down onto his abdomen and ripped apart the sensitive protoform, Energon spraying out and oozing into large puddles – 

This wasn’t Darkmount. Predaking wasn’t here. He wasn’t dead. 

Yet, said a voice in the back of his processors.

He couldn’t focus on anything but the pain as his wound was kicked repeatedly. He was hyperventilating, not even trying to defend himself. 

It was too much. The memories, the pain, it was too much. He couldn’t– 

He heard a loud clang, and the kicking stopped.

He slowly online his optics, and widened them in shock at what he saw.

Bumblebee was fighting the Wolficon. He was punching and kicking him, sending him further and further from Starscream.

Still clutching his wound, he slowly and shakily rose to his pedes. He couldn’t believe it. Why had Bumblebee saved him?

Maybe he just wanted to make sure Starscream ended up in a stasis pod instead of dead. But the question was still running through his processor. Why? 

Soon, the members of the Autobots team all got to their area of the scrapyard, weapons raised.

Steeljaw was outnumbered.

He growled, and in a final moment he punched Bumblebee, hard. The bot was sent stumbling back, distracting everyone for a few seconds. That gave him enough time to transform and escape, his engine roaring behind him as he left.

They all gathered around their lieutenant, who shook his helm and got to his pedes. He looked at all the worried faceplates staring back at him.

“Sir, are you alright?” Strongarm asked, her usually calm and serious faceplated filled with worry.

He shook a servo in the air.

“I’m fine Strongarm,” he said, smiling at his teammates.

A cough and harsh slam snapped them out of their daze. They turned around, and all saw Starscream on his knees clutching his abdomen. Energon was oozing out of a large gash on his side, and the seeker was battered and bruised. 

Bumblebee walked towards him, and looked down at the seeker. The seeker turned his head up. He looked into those blue optics, and immediately his helm went down. 

He had done something wrong. He hadn’t captured the Decepticon, he should have been able to catch him. He shouldn’t have gotten injured. He should have kept on fighting despite it. Slag why did he mess everything up?! Now not only was he going to end up in a stasis pod, but he’d be additionally punished for his incompetence, his uselessness. 

He squeezed his optics, expecting the unavoidable blow to strike him. He waited for the phrase: “you failed.”.

It never came. 

“Thank you,” Bumblebee said, “for saving me back there. You’re badly injured, let me help you.”.

Starscream looked back up, optics wide in shock. He looked infront, and saw the yellow autobot had his servo extended.

Starscream hesitantly took it. He shakily got to his pedes, and Bumblebee used his other servo to steady the wounded seeker.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized, “I’m sorry for failing, for–”

“What are you talking about?” Bumblebee asked, confusion clear on his faceplates, “You didn’t fail Starscream. Thanks to you we have our base back.”.

The seeker was dumbstruck. Had the Autobot thanked him? 

“C’mon,” the mech said, leading Starscream towards the command console, “let’s get you patched up.”.

This was a first.

Chapter Text

Afternoon came quick. The sky was now a vibrant shade of orange, peach clouds fluttering like wisps in the sky. Starscream took every detail in, knowing this would most likely be the last time he saw the sky. 

After Bumblebee and his team had finished conversing, he knew what fate awaited him; a stasis pod with his name on it. It wasn’t that bad , he told himself, at least you weren’t beaten and berated . That was still shocking. He hadn’t done enough, he wasn’t good enough, and yet he wasn’t punished for it. 

It felt weird. 

He didn’t get it. He should have been hit, he should have been reprimanded, at least left to bleed for a lot longer, to prove he was worth medical attention. He was not ready to be lifted up and immediately repaired. He was even helped up, when he should have just been able to rise to his own pedes. If he wasn’t strong enough to get up, he shouldn’t have gotten treatment. He had to earn it. Not have it be given to him. 

Soft pedsteps broke him out of his thoughts. He snapped his helm up, and saw Bumblebee heading towards him. He practically jumped to his feet, almost falling over. A servo on his shoulderplates caught him.

“Woah calm down,” Bumblebee said, “take it easy Starscream, that was a nasty wound you had there. And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but without you we’d be scrap. You saved our tailpipes back there, and I just think that you deserve my thanks.”.

Starscream was so utterly perplexed by this odd behaviour, he was speechless for a few seconds. Then he shook his helm slightly.

“It’s no problem,” he said, looking down, a small twinge of shame burning in his spark, “I guess I should thank you as well. For helping me when you didn’t need to.”.

“What do you mean?” the yellow autobot asked.

“Well you gave me medical aid,” the seeker said, “and you also saved me from that Wolficon. So I must thank you as well.”.

“Oh,” Bumblebee responded, “uh, you’re welcome.”.

This was getting very awkward very quickly. 

“I guess I should, uh,” Starscream started, “go find a stasis pod. After all, I’m no longer of use.”.

He began to walk to where several pods were stacked, but stopped in his tracks when he felt the servo still on his shoulder. He turned his helm, an optic ridge raised to show the seeker’s confusion.

“Starscream, wait,” the yellow bot began, taking a deep breath, “I’ve had a discussion with my team, and we’ve come to an agreement of sorts.”.

“Go on,” the seeker said, intrigued and puzzled.

“We’ve decided,” he started, biting down on his lower lip plate before letting out a sigh, “that we’re going to put you under heavy probation.”.

Starscream was stunned. “M-meaning…?”.

“If you prove to use that you’ve changed, genuinely changed,” he said, “and that you adopt the Autobot code… if you do that, we will allow you to become one of us. We will let you be an Autobot.”.

Shock. Then, a complete feeling of utter joy overtook the seeker. He wanted to cry, he wanted to weep on his knees and thank the yellow bot. 

“We…” Bumblebee hesitated, but continued, “I am putting a lot of trust in you. And it’s not easy, considering everything you’ve done. So please don’t disappoint me. Please.”.  

The seeker understood. He would have to show significant change and devotion to prove himself worthy. And he wouldn’t disappoint. He’d disappointed too many times already. But not this time.

“I won’t fail,” he said, “I will make sure of it.”.

The yellow bot nodded, walking off and leaving Starscream alone. And the seeker could not refrain the small smile that spread across his faceplates.

He’d been accepted.

Chapter Text

When he was summoned by his superior, Starscream almost ran to him. Overjoyed was one way to describe just how the seeker felt. He walked towards Bumblebee and his team, bowing his head slightly. 

“Here are the basic rules we’ve decided,” Bumblebee began, “you are not allowed to leave the premises of the scrapyard for any missions, unless they are crucial. You will instead help Fix-It in communications. You will also not be allowed to be on solo patrol, and must be accompanied by one of us. We will also monitor your flight. Fix-It is currently working on a device to limit your flight range. You will have an active tracker, that you are not allowed to turn off at any time. And, your weapons will be disabled and handed over. We will loosen these restrictions and allow you to accompany us on missions when we think you are trustworthy enough.”.

Well no one said it was going to be easy. 

Any complaint Starscream wanted to utter he put a clamp on. This was as good as it gets , he told himself. He should be grateful they even considered this option in the first place given all of the seeker’s past crimes.

“I understand,” said the seeker.

“Good,” Bumblebee said, “report to the command centre to have the tracker and flight restrictor fitted on you.”.

With that the seeker nodded, dipped his head slightly, and walked to where the command centre was. 

When he arrived, the orange minicon was already waiting for him. He was fidgety, clearly nervous. Once Starscream would have been proud of that. Now he was ashamed.

He first removed the blasters on his arms, and set them down on the ground. “This model of my body has no internal blasters,” he explained, “and Megatron made me change chassis to get the upgrade. But you can check if you want.”.

Fix-It settled for double-checking, to make sure the seeker’s statement was true. He took out a stick-like device, which Starscream assumed was a scanner of sorts, and hovered it over the seeker’s extended servos. When no signs of blasters registered on the device’s screen, Fix-It knew the seeker was being truthful.

“Huh,” the minicon said, “I thought it was only the newer models that had no internal blasters.”.

That confused Starscream, but soon came to the conclusion that with no war, there were no need for built in weapons. 

“This body was made before the war,” he stated, “and built-in blaster upgrades were only available when the war had already started.”.

“Then why didn’t you get any?” the minicon asked, puzzled.

“I told you,” the seeker shrugged, a sour expression overtaking his faceplates, “My former master Megatron denied me the upgrade, and I only got one when I switched chassis, per his instructions.”.

“Oh,” was Fix-It’s response, “that explains why your appearance didn’t match any from my database. You were a lot smaller and, uh, thinner.”.

Starscream held back a scowl. Yes, Megatron had Shockwave design the chassis with those specific details in mind. Made it easier for his mighty leader to wrap those sharp talons around his neck and swing him around like a scraplet. In that chassis the best he could do was scratch the warlord, which was only met with more brutal beatings. 

You deserved it.

He shook out of it.

“Yes,” he muttered, “that’s why.”.

“May I ask,” the minicon started, “why did you switch chassis again, and what happened to your other one?”.

Starscream flinched.

– his small wing got caught in Skylynx’s maw, and the Predacon snapped down, and the sound of metal being ripped and shredder was drowned out by a loud shriek–

Not Darkmount, he told himself, that was long ago. This is not Darkmount.

“I didn’t like it,” he blurted out, “besides this one is larger and more useful.”.

The answer felt out of place, but Fix-It wasn’t going to argue with a seeker who had razor sharp claws capable of slicing and dicing minicons into scrap metal. 

“All done!” the minicon announced, changing the subject as quickly as possible, “the tracker and flight restrictor have been fitted and your weapons will be stored away.”. 

Starscream blinked. The minicon was already done? That felt quick. He shrugged.

“Thanks,” the seeker said, getting back up and brushing himself off, “so what do I need to do now?”.

“Now, uh,” the minicon started, but was unsure what the seeker was actually supposed to be doing, “I don’t really know.”. 

“Should I find the lieutenant?” he asked.

“Maybe– wait, lieutenant?” the minicon questioned, completely bewildered.

“That’s his title, is it not?” the seeker asked, raising an opticas ridge, “or am I supposed to call him something else?”.

“Oh no no no that is his title of address,” the minicon corrected, shaking his servos in a left to right motion, “I just did not expect you to call him that.”.

“Why, wouldn’t I?” Starscream asked, not understanding the minicon’s confusion, “it’s proper to call a superior by their title. Why would I be excluded from that formality?”.

Starscream’s behaviour was ever so strange, but Fix-It thought it best to keep that comment to himself.

“Nevermind,” the minicon said, putting on a nervous smile, “but yes maybe it’s best if you go to lieutenant Bumblebee.”.

The seeker nodded, and walked off to find his superior officer. Meanwhile, Fix-It tried to wrap his head around Starscream’s unusual manners. Why was it so important to address Bumblebee by just his rank? Sure Fix-It did it, but Starscream was a new member of the team who had past instances of completely disregarding authority (clear through his relationship with Megatron). So why was he so insistent to call Bumblebee his ‘lieutenant’?

Fix-It didn’t know if he’d ever find out.  

Chapter Text

He’d found Lieutenant Bumblebee talking with two of his bots. One was red, the other blue and white. He didn’t remember their designations properly, and he decided to wait until the lieutenant was finished. He didn’t hear what they were talking about, for they spoke in hushed voices, but he assumed it might have something to do with him. He just had a feeling. But nonetheless he waited.

It was only a few minutes until Bumblebee turned around, taking notice of the seeker’s presence. He walked over to the mech, his teammates giving him weary glances.

“Starscream,” Bumblebee said, “do you need anything?”.

“I got the tracker and regulator fitted on like you asked,” he said, “and I was wondering what I needed to do next.”.

“Oh,” the yellow mech said, “well Sideswipe can show you where to recharge.”.

The red bot’s optics widened, his gaze switching from Bumblebee to Starscream.

The seeker simply nodded, and started back at Sideswipe. The red bot gulped a little, but gave a quick nod before Bumblebee and Strongarm walked off and left him alone with the seeker. 

“So should we…?” he did a circular motion with his index digit before pointing in a direction. The seeker nodded, lifting a servo and motioning in the direction the Autobot was pointing.

“Lead the way,” was all the seeker said. 

“Okay,” Sideswipe said.

He began walking, Starscream at his side with his servos behind his back. The situation was incredibly awkward. Sideswipe coughed slightly, which made the seeker twist his helm to face him.

“So, second-in-command of the ‘Cons huh?” the red bot asked, “that must’ve been cool.”.

The seeker’s faceplates remained void of emotion, which didn’t help to calm Sideswipe’s nerves.

“Yes,” he said, “the position came with its perks. But why the interest?”.

“Oh, uh,” Sideswipe started, unsure of how to explain his interest, “you’re just a big deal on Cybertron. Bots from the war say you were quite dangerous and stuff, not to mention how everyone talks about… uh… how good it is that you’re finally gone.”.

That was hard to say. Now he hoped Starscream didn’t murder him.

“...Ah,” Starscream said, “that makes sense. I wasn’t exactly someone to be missed. But tell me, what’s it like?”.

“What’s what like?” the red bot questioned, confusion evident in his voice. 

“Cybertron.”.

Oh right. Starscream hadn’t been around to see Cybetron be rebuilt (well mostly since everyone thought he was dead). 

“Well everything is different,” the bot began, “it’s got lots of shiny and tall buildings, lots of mechs, very modern as well. Probably very different from what you remember. But, it’s nice.”. 

Starscream nodded softly, then looked at the sky.

“Are there any… flying bots?” he asked, an almost mournful look on his faceplates.

“Well, sorta,” Sideswipe said, scratching his helm, “not that many, most folk are grounders. But there is the occasional flyer. Donno if the Seeker’s are a thing, I never really payed attention to flyers, and my mentor didn’t really like me talking about flyers. He was a bot from the war, says fliying bots brought him bad memories.”.

“Mentor?” Starscream asked, raising an optical ridge.

“Well let's say I’m not exactly a bot who played nice on Cybertron,” he started, “my mentor kinda helped me out a bit, and he’d usually be the one to get me out of trouble. Which was most of the time.”.

The seeker hummed softly as a response, as if telling him to continue. Sideswipe didn’t know why he blurted all this out to the former Decepticon, he hadn’t even told this to Strongarm. The only other member of their team who knew this was Bumblebee, but that was only because him and his mentor had history.

“Yeah he’d usually scold me every time I’d race and run around, which wasn’t fair seeing as he did the same,” Sideswipe grumbled, which made the seeker chuckle lightly.

“So yeah that’s kinda my origin story if that’s what you wanna call it,” Sideswipe said.

The seeker nodded slightly.

“And we’re here,” Sideswipe said, snapping out of his own thoughts. 

The seeker looked at the space. It was a little patch of barren ground with a pair of cuffs at the side. The seeker looked at the cuffs, then at the red bot.

“Bee just wants to be safe,” was Sideswipe’s response, “you know, just precautions.”.

The red bot expected the seeker to snap or argue, but he simply nodded.

“Understandable,” he said plainly, then smirked, “after all I do have quite the dangerous track record, for an ‘old Screamer’.”.

Sideswipe’s jaw dropped open. “How do you know about that?”

“How else did you think those doors opened?” the seeker said, small smirk still on his faceplates.

“Oh,” was Sideswipe's response, then he smiled sheepishly, “no hard feelings?”.

“None at all,” the seeker said, “thank you, again, for this.”.

“No prob, Bob,” the red bot said.

Starscream squinted, but said nothing. The bot must’ve been learning human expressions.

“Anyways I better put these on,” he said, scratching the back of his helm again. He grabbed the cuffs, and was surprised when the seeker already had his servos stretched out.

He clamped the cuffs down on the former Decepticon, who then nodded. 

“Well, nice talk,” Sideswipe said, “uh, recharge well? See you in the morning?”.

Starscream gave a small smile, then laid down on the patch of ground before shutting his optics.

Sideswipe nodded, muttering ‘cool’ under his breath before leaving. 

Chapter Text

Strongarm couldn’t recharge. 

She had this nagging voice in the back of her processor that told her that the seeker was up to something. Strongarm didn’t trust him, still sure everything was an act. Sure she’d voted in favour of his assistance, but that didn’t mean she was going to be ‘buddy buddy’ with a Decepticon war criminal. She’d read about the terrible deeds Starscream had committed, all his treachery towards his own faction, about the mech’s he’d killed. She didn’t think this was a good idea. 

That was it. She would never fall into recharge with these thoughts running rampant in her processor. Careful not to alert anyone, the white and blue mech got up and gently made her way to where the seeker’s recharge area was. It had been hastily put together in an area of the scrapyard that was nowhere near the command console or their energon stock. And even with all these precautions, Strongarm didn’t think it would be enough. The seeker was slippery and tricky, her mentors had told her so. He’d even killed an Autobot in cold energon. The one called Cliffjumper. He used to be her mentor’s closest friend, and Starscream had killed him. The seeker had most likely killed more, the slagger. And only now did he want to change? For Strongarm, it seemed too little too late. 

She slipped through the stacks of things, pressing herself into a shelf and looking over to see the seeker. He wasn’t in recharge. He was curled up into a ball, staring at a self-projected screen. She pressed her back closer, determined to see what the seeker was doing. Was he contacting someone? She suppressed a growl, clenching her denta tightly as she took out her blaster. 

The screen began to talk, and Strongarm nearly shot the seeker until she heard the voice. 

It was Starscream’s voice. 

But it didn’t make any sense. The seeker’s mouth plates were closed, and the voice–

She froze. It was a log.

“Log date 1828? 1838?

Frag it. I’ve lost count. Doesn’t matter.”. 

The seeker’s frustrated voice came out of the screen, and this time she saw his face on the recording. That was new. The one on the ship had simply provided audio, no footage. She put her blaster back in it’s holster, and opted to just listen to the recording. She could figure out what the seeker was planning.

“Fragging Megatron is nowhere. How can a mech that big just vanish?! Where is he?!”.

The seeker was yelling into the screen, pure rage on his faceplates. She almost smirked. Served him right. After all that time, the seeker had still been looking for Megatron. The little glitch was so traitorous he would kill the leader of his own damn faction just for power. What a–  

“I just– my processor aches. I need to recharge. I have no indication of time anymore, but it doesn’t matter. I just need to find him. That’s all that matters.”.

The seeker had clawed at his helm, then he just scowled, facing away from the camera. His anger was dwindling, and an almost tired expression consumed his faceplates. Odd. She continued to listen.

“Not this fragging feeling in my spark, not this drowning silence, not this urge to rip the spark from my chamber! None of it fragging matters! Whatever. Just, Starscream out.”.

During that last sentence, the mech’s voice had cracked. It sounded… almost sad. Desperate. Whatever smirk she had wanted on her faceplates was replaced with a frown. Then the question hit her; just how long had the seeker been alone in space for? How long had he been chasing after someone long long gone? 

“You can come out,” said a voice, rattling her focus and freezing her joints, “I know you’re there.”.

Strongarm slowly crept out of the shadows, her blue optics boring into those red, red optics. She searched for any clue of malice, of vicious intent, anything that could indicate the seeker was planning bloodshed. Nothing. Just pure exhaustion and misery. She didn’t understand it. And when she didn’t understand something, she treated it as a threat.

“Well?” she growled defensively, “aren’t you going to yell at me for not trusting you? For listening into your log?”.

“Why would I do that?” the seeker said, and Strongarm had to take a step back.

Starscream sighed. “Look I don’t blame you for your distrust towards me. I don’t even trust myself. I was, sort of am, a dangerous mech and potential threat. I know that my words mean scrap, and that you wouldn’t believe anything that came out of my mouth. I do not blame you.”.

She was completely taken aback. This wasn’t the seeker her mentors had warned her about. This wasn’t some devious, deceitful and cowardly monster, but just some sad and pathetic old bot. She came to the most logical conclusion she could muster. Was this some act?

“If you think you can trick me by pretending to act–” 

the seeker just sighed. 

They didn’t get it. He didn’t expect them to. 

But he’d wandered through endless space in some fruitless attempt at closure, and justice. For so long he was chasing a ghost, and it took him fifteen fragging years to realize it was pointless. His search was in vain. Megatron always got what he wanted, and Starscream was left to pay for everything. Had he committed terrible and unfathomable crimes? Of course he had! He wasn’t preaching to be some saint, he knew he wasn’t. But Megatron’s deeds were always piled on top of him as well. When that slagger took off, he’d dropped everything on his second, letting him suffer for everything. Megatron got away, and Starscream was punished. Megatron got away with barely a scratch, while Starscream had been torn limb from limb. 

But he would never reveal that to them. He would not put his anguish on display to prove a point. He would just keep everything in. that way no one would know just how weak he was. If he showed weakness, just how broken and bruised he was, the Autobots would get rid of him. They would think him useless, and dispose of him. He didn’t want that. He would never ever say it aloud, but he was scared. Starscream was very, very scared.

Strongarm just stared at the seeker. He hadn’t snapped. There wasn’t a trace of anger on his face. Just this ever growing look of sorrow and fatigue.

“I’m tired,” he said, “and I don’t mean in the sense of recharge. I’m just… very tired.”.

She wanted to speak, but stopped when she saw lubricant begin to well in the seeker’s optics. At that moment, Strongarm had no idea what to do. But she blurted it out.

“You’re crying,” she said.

His eyes widened in shock, blinking rapidly. Quickly, he threw his servos on to his face and wiped furiously. 

“N-no I wasn’t,” he said, pulling the servos away. Strongarm was surprised he hadn’t clawed his face off by just how quickly he’d scrubbed his face of lubricant.

Strongarm definitely didn’t know what to do, but a small part of her wanted to make sure the seeker got the message. She didn’t trust him, and she wasn’t going to fall for whatever trick this was.

“You may be on our team,” she growled, stepping forward and leaning down until her face was mere centimeters away from Starscream’s, “but if you do one misstep, give me one reason to think that you would turn on us, and it will be the end of the line for you Decepticon.”.

Starscream bit back a whimper. For a small second, he could almost picture Megatron’s faceplates in front of him. The warlord’s scarred face with those burning red optics and jagged dentae gritted in a scowl.

You will perish on this very day.

He quickly nodded, and Strongarm pulled away, walking away with a growl still on her faceplates.

Once she left, the seeker curled back up into a ball, squeezing his optics shut and repeating the same phrase over and over again: 

He isn’t here. 

He isn’t here. 

He isn’t here.

Megatron is not here.

Chapter Text

“Not that way!” the minicon yelped, “please be gentle when you put it down! If it ruptures we could have a serious conjunction– junction– malfunction!”.

Starscream held back a groan. A few days ago, when he was told he would be helping the minicon, he was not expecting to be a worker drone. He was hauling stasis pods back and forth like some sort of Vehicon, and every once in a while when he wanted to stomp the minicon to death he reminded himself he was supposed to be ‘changing’. So instead he settled for grumbling. He slowly walked to where the minicon pointed and set the pod down. 

The minicon let out a sigh of relief, then went over to the pod to check nothing was damaged. He looked it over, inspecting it fully. Nope. No damage. 

He looked back up at the seeker, who had a look of impatience he was desperately trying to cover.

“So that’s the fifth pod,” Fix-It said, “which means there are thirteen left.”. 

Starscream wanted to give up. He wanted to fly up into space and stay there. But he just kept telling himself that at least he was being useful. 

Don’t let them even consider the option ‘useless’, he told himself. 

He nodded, walking back over to where the other empty pods were stacked. He grabbed hold of one and hoisted it up with ease. He then carefully made his way to where the minicon was, setting the pod down with just as much care as the other one. The minicon went to inspect it, and the seeker's left optic twitched. The minicon acted like he'd thrown the pod down in a tantrum. The minicon nodded. 

"Maybe you should take a break," the minicon said, "you have been at this for quite a while.".

To Fix-It's surprise, Starscream shook his helm. 

"No, no, I'm fine," he stated simply, "I can wait until I'm finished.". 

"Okay," Fix-It said wearily, "but you should take one if you feel strained. I don't want you to overwork yourself.".

For a moment, Starscream felt a small warm feeling in his spark. Did the minicon—

"After all you could end up damaging a pod," the minicon said. 

The feeling vanished instantly. No. He didn't. It was the pod. 

Do you think anyone cares? 

Starscream snapped out of it. Now wasn't the time. 

He nodded. 

"Understood," the seeker states, hoping the minicon didn't hear the disappointment in his voice. Then, the seeker went to pick up another pod. 

… 

Fix-It wondered how in Primus Starscream wasn't tired. He'd hauled pods back and forth for well over an hour now, and he hadn't requested a single break. 

It took the minicon stating he needed to be elsewhere and that in the meantime Starscream should take a break for the seeker to finally accept. And even then, it was more because Fix-It wanted the break so he could get away from the former Decepticon. He'd noticed the seeker's twitching, and didn't want to push his luck. So he took off in one direction, leaving Starscream to his own devices. The seeker decided to wander around. 

He walked through the seemingly endless shelves stocked with human machinery and relics, and let his mind wander. He began to think about Knockout.

He wondered what the red medic was doing now, and where he was. He'd never say it aloud, but he missed that son of a glitch. If he ever met Knockout again, he'd most likely hug him, after he clobbered him for breaking the Immobiliser over his head. 

Starscream gave a small smile. He and Knockout had a strange relationship. Friends? Rivals? Frenemies? Not even Starscream knew what they were. It was complicated. Especially with those instances when the two managed to get away from Nemesis. Away from the war, when it was just them two and no one else mattered. Those types of moments he had with the medic were some he really enjoyed. 

He knew everything was different now, but he still hoped to make it up to the medic one day. 

… 

The minicon was taking quite a while to show. So Starscream went looking for him himself. The seeker walked through more shelves of stuff until he found the minicon near the entrance. 

"Oh, boy!" the human boy, Russel, whined aloud, clutching his head and shaking it. 

Before Starscream could ask what the trouble was, he heard large pedsteps and flinched. He twisted his helm to face the direction the sound was coming from and saw it was the Dinobot.

"Back from solo patrol!" he said, "and I did not see one filthy Decepticon. Mm-mm, no, sir, nope.".

Just then the Lieutenant arrived as well, and Starscream directed his attention towards his superior. 

"Another uneventful patrol, huh," Bumblebee said, "maybe we're running out of Decepticons.". 

"Maybe," the Dinobot said, "because my patrol was totally uneventful too." 

Starscream narrowed his optics at that statement. He could tell from experience when someone was lying. And the Dinobot was doing a pretty poor job as well.

"I mean, completely free of Decepticons," the Dinobot said nervously, the worry evident in his voice, "or smashing of any kind.". 

Yep. He was lying alright. At that moment, Starscream wondered if he should call the Dinobot out on his bluff, but decided against it. He was already struggling with his safety enough as it is, he didn't need the Autobots to become hostile because of a misinterpretation. Keeping his mouth shut was usually in his best interests. He almost always screwed things up when he talked. 

Bumblebee eyed Grimlock suspiciously but said nothing when his attention was drawn elsewhere. 

"Lieutenant!" Fix-It said. 

Bumblebee turned around to look at the minicon. 

"I picked up a Decepticon signal in the woods," the minicon stated, "near the old demolition derby arena.".

"Grim, wasn't that right where you were patrolling?" questioned Strongarm, putting a servo on her hip. 

Starscream could feel the anxiety of the Dinobot and almost rolled his optics at the Dinobot's defence. 

"Was it? Huh. Did not notice," the Dinobot responded, "I was really busy, um, not smashing stuff.". 

Starscream wanted to laugh. That was the worst lie ever told. 

"Grim," Bumblebee said, gritting his denta.

The Dinobot broke. 

"I saw another Dinobot," he said, "and I let him go.".

Starscream knew it. 

"You let an escaped criminal go free?!" Strongarm yelled, and Bumblebee shook his helm. 

"Scowl was not hurting anyone!" Grimlock explained, "he was just smashing. That's what Dinobots do.".

That was a poor excuse in Starscream's eyes. But once again he kept his mouth shut. 

"I bet he's just completely innocent," the Dinobot said, giving a hopeful smile, "I mean, sweet guy, really sweet.".

Starscream shook his head. These Autobots were so soft. Then again, without their softness, he'd be stuck in a stasis pod. 

The minicon took out some device and began swiping through something on it. Starscream gave a puzzled look, wondering what the minicon was doing. 

"The database said this Scowl worked for Thunderhoof," the minicon stated, "he was a wrecker, destroying the homes of Bots who wouldn't vacate after Thunderhoof stole the land they sat on.".

All optics turned to Grimlock. 

"Scrap.".

The lieutenant let out a groan. 

"Well, hopefully, Scowl hasn't hooked up with Thunderhoof yet," he said. 

"But if he has, maybe Scowl can lead us to the rest of Steeljaw's pack," Strongarm said. 

Three of them transformed, while the lieutenant and the Dinobot didn't. 

"Bee, I won't let you down again," the Dinobot promised. 

"I hope not Grim," Bumblebee said, "Okay Autobots, let's wreck and roll!". 

Starscream had to bite down on his claw to stop from bursting into laughter. He tried his best to regain his posture but was failing at it. He had to remind himself that this was his superior and that he couldn't do anything foolish. 

"See 'wreck' because Scowl wrecks stuff," he said, once again desperate to save the situation, "and then I— and I was like 'roll' because that's— that's what we do.". 

"And 'lame' because that was lame," Sideswipe retorted. 

"Fine." was Bumblebee's only response. 

Starscream was taken aback. Since when could someone insult their superior like that? And without retribution? If he'd spoken to Megatron like that, his wings would've been dented in. 

Starscream was barely paying attention when the team left, still wondering how the red bot managed to get away with that. A gentle tap on his pede brought him to his senses. He looked down, and saw Russell looking up at him. 

"Aren't you going to go with them?" he asked, and Starscream shook his head. 

"The lieutenant gave me orders to stay in the base unless he specifies otherwise," Starscream answered, "and I still have tasks to do.".

With that he looked at the minicon, who nearly jumped. 

"Oh righty then," the minicon said, "well we really should get back to organising those pods.".

Starscream nodded, going in the direction of the pods to complete his task. 

… 

"I think I'm done," Starscream said, placing the last pod on the ground, "unless you need me to do more tasks.". 

The minicon shook his head frantically. 

"no no," he said, "you don't need to do more tasks. You're free for the rest of the day.".

Fix-It gave a nervous smile, hoping to Primus the seeker just went away. They'd been at this all morning, and Fix-It just wanted to get back to the command center away from the very dangerous and unpredictable seeker. 

"Very well," the seeker said, "but if there is anything else you need me to do, tell me.". 

Then the seeker walked off, and Fix-It let out a sigh of relief. Finally. 

Fix-It rolled in the other direction, happy to be done. 

… 

Starscream was bored. He was supposed to be doing something. He felt useless sitting around doing nothing. He wanted to be doing something. But in the end, he just sat down and ended up going through stuff. 

He checked up on the ship, looking through the feed to make sure nothing was out of place. Nothing of interest. He checked his energon vault, and once again nothing was out of place. He groaned. Feeling useless was something he hated. Because uselessness was usually followed by a beating. Was the minicon sure he wasn't supposed to be doing something? 

Hesitantly, making sure no one was around, he opened up one of his logs. One of the newer ones. 

"Log, whatever. There's no point recording the number anymore, I've lost count. I'm still no closer to finding Megatron, and I'm running low on energon, which means I have to find a deposit somewhere. And to where I'm headed, I know a few mines… but I'm having more nightmares. And it's always him. Always. H-he's always there, and I know he's never leaving. I'm always going to be in his shadow… UNTIL I finish him off. That's the only way to be rid of him. Gah! Still recording. Um, Starscream 

… out.".

That was one of the logs Starscream hated the most. Even after fifteen stellar cycles, he was still having those nightmares. He had one the first night here, and since then, he'd come to a decision: He wouldn't recharge. 

The nightmares were too vivid and terrifying that he knew recharge wouldn't help. He needed to prove he wasn't weak, and these nightmares made him weak. So he would stay awake. He didn't need recharge after all. He could manage. He was Starscream. He could handle anything, so he didn't need to recharge. 

It wasn't important. 

… 

It was hours until the team returned, and in that time Starscream had managed to comb through three more entries before deciding to get up and walk around. He hadn't done much apart from his tasks, and he waited to get assigned a new one. 

He looked at them as they entered the scrapyard, Decepticon in tow. They were giving strange looks to the humans, who were doing something that looked like dancing. 

"What exactly did we miss?" the Dinobot said. 

Starscream wondered the same thing. 

Bumblebee just shrugged, turning around to leave. He walked off, but nearly jumped when he saw Starscream. 

“Gah! Starscream!” the yellow bot yelped, “sorry, you startled me.”.

“It’s fine,” the seeker said.

“So, uh, did you get your tasks done?” Bumblebee asked.

“Of course,” Starscream said, “I completed all of my tasks for the day.”.

“Great,” Bumblebee said, “so you mind helping us put this ‘Con in a stasis pod?”.  

“Of course M— of course.".

Bumblebee raised an optical ridge, but said nothing more. 

The seeker had some strange behaviour.

Chapter Text

“Starscream?” 

The seeker shook himself out of his daze. “What?”. Sideswipe gave him an odd look, raising his servos slightly. 

“You’ve been staring at the sky for a long time dude,” he said, “thought you might fall into recharge with your optics open.”.

Scrap. At least Sideswipe wasn’t questioning if the bot had been recharging. Or if he was doing well. 

“Sorry, I was unfocused,” the seeker said, shaking a servo. Then his memory clicked. “Aren’t you supposed to be on patrol?”.

The red bot’s eyes widened in shock. “Uh, nope.”. Starscream smirked. 

“Really?” Starscream asked innocently, “after all I swore I heard the Lieutenant tell you you were supposed to be patrolling around the northern area after dawn.”.

Sideswipe gulped, then raised his servos in defeat. “Okay okay yes I’m supposed to be on patrol. But it’s boring! Nothing’s happened since we got that Dinobot!”. 

“Just because it’s boring doesn’t mean you can’t do it,” Starscream scoffed, shaking his head, “honestly, if this were still the war–” he nearly smirked at Sideswipe’s groan –“then your base would’ve been raided by now.”.

“Jeez do you old bots ever shut up about the war?” the red bot groaned.

Starscream’s expression turned from one of cockiness to complete outrage. 

“I am not old!” he snapped, “honestly you younger bots are the problem! There’s no respect anymore!”. 

“Yeah, yeah whatever boomer,” Sideswipe said, smirking. It vanished instantly when he heard Bumblebee call his name. “Scrap! Uh, yeah better go and patrol! See ya!”.

The red bot transformed and zoomed off, leaving Starscream alone. The seeker chuckled, folding his servo’s over his cockpit. Amateur. Just then, he heard pedsteps and sluggishly turned around. The lieutenant walked in his direction. 

“Have you seen Sideswipe?” Bumblebee asked, “I haven’t found him anywhere, and Strongarm said she didn’t see him leave for patrol.”.

“I have,” the seeker responded, “you just missed him, he heard you coming and sped off.”. 

The yellow bot groaned. “That bot is going to be the death of me.”.

Starscream would’ve laughed. Instead, he settled for silence. 

“If you want Starscream,” Bumblebee started, “you could take the day off. You do your tasks all the time and don’t slack off. Which is more than I can say for some bots.”.

Starscream froze. “Are you… sure? I wouldn’t want to be useless to you.”.

“No really, it’s fine,” Bumblebee said, “you don’t need to push yourself too much. You do your work well and you deserve a break.”. 

Starscream was hesitant. He already felt like he was slacking off, but if his superior told him so, then he should accept. Finally, the seeker nodded.

“Thank you, M– sir,” the seeker said, dipping slightly. He was slipping up too often. 

Either Bumblebee didn’t notice or didn’t mind, but he did not question the seeker’s slip. Instead, he nodded and walked off. And Starscream was alone. Again. He stayed silent and stood for a few minutes until he decided to try something. He slid onto the dusty ground, leaning his head on his knees. He took a shaky breath before closing his eyes.

It was dark. He couldn’t tell where he was, he couldn’t tell anything really. Not only was it dark, but it was also silent, and very still. He moved slightly, before beginning to walk. He managed to hear his pedsteps echoing in this vast void, but nothing else. 

He walked for what felt like hours until he felt something falling on his helm. He swiped his servo over it, looking down at it to see what it was. Dust. 

Confused, he continued to walk, until a small spot of light appeared at the end of the darkness. With an impulse, and the curiosity to understand what was happening, he ran towards it. The light grew closer and closer, until–

He was in a cave. He wanted to groan. What was he doing in a cave?

His answer came in the form of trembling ground, and the sound of very, very large pedsteps. Ones he recognized all too well. He twisted around, ready to run back where he came from before he slammed into something. He stumbled back, falling onto the crumbly ground with a thud. He shook his helm, looking up, and immediately regretting it. Those burning red optics, those symmetric scars, that sharp-toothed scowl. It was all too familiar.

Megatron. 

He needed a plan after he stopped shaking like a leaf.

“Starscream.” the warlord growled, in a tone, Starscream knew all too well. He was going to be punished.

He chose to run. He scrambled to his pedes, starting into a sprint before something grabbed his back and threw him across the cave. He crashed against a rock, falling back on the ground. He looked down at his servos, and his optics widened at their shape. Oh, Primus, this was his other chassis. He didn’t have any time to take any information in, because a clawed servo wrapped around his neck and hoisted him up. And his optics met Megatron’s. 

He screamed, squirming around in the warlord’s grip. Megatron responded by tightening his grip till Starscream was choking, swearing his voice box was about to be crushed. He stopped struggling, and simply shivered as he stared in terror at the warlord. 

“You have ceased to be of use to me, Starscream,” the warlord growled, dropping the seeker like a sack of stones, then charging up his blaster, “so you shall simply cease to be.”.

“N-no! Master please!” the seeker begged, eyes wide with fear, “I-i’m not useless! I swear! Please don’t terminate me! Please!”.

Starscream was scared, very very scared. He was stuck in here, with no one to help him, at the mercy of Megatron. Like he always was. 

The cannon charged up, and Starscream looked at the warlord, into those burning red optics.

And the last thing he heard, was his voice.

“You were always worthless.”.

The blaster fired.

Starscream woke up in a start, jumping to his pedes and tripping over himself. He landed flat on his cockpit and began to squirm around. He scrambled to his pedes, optics darting around the area. He looked up, and almost cried when he saw a blue sky. 

It was a dream. There was no cave, and most importantly no Megatron.

He growled. That settles it. He wouldn't recharge. 

He would not see that blaster or those red optics ever again.

Chapter Text

It was dark now, the sky littered with thousands of stars. He looked up at the sky longingly, his bound servos laying on his lap. He sighed, desperately fighting the urge to shut his optics. He had to stay awake. He could do it. If he could lead a team of seekers into battle and manage to not get hit by a single shot, he could stay awake. He had to. 

There was no way he would recharge with Megatron haunting his consciousness, waiting in that cold dark cave to extinguish his spark. 

Starscream shuddered at the image of those red optics, full of hate and anger. That was enough to keep him awake through the night. 

He sluggishly slid down further, until he lay flat on the ground, staring up at the sky. He longed to feel the cold rush of the wind, to soar above the clouds and fly. He missed being able to fly, he missed it so much. 

That’s it , he told himself, think about flight . 

He could keep Megatron out, he could do it.

… 

“You look awful dude,” Sideswipe commented.

“Says you,” the seeker grumbled, narrowing his optics.

“Hey!” Sideswipe snapped, “I’m not the one who looks like a zombie!”

“Keep the zombie talk for yourself,” Starscream groaned, “I already had enough with the terrorcons stomping around the Nemesis and making me wish for termination.”. 

“Wait what?” Sideswipe asked, puzzled.

“Long story,” the seeker said, then resumed his work instead of paying attention to the red bot.

Sideswipe, realizing it was pointless to try talking to the seeker, simply shrugged and walked off. Starscream let out a sigh of relief; the last thing he needed was bots asking about his state, or lack of sleep. He could manage. He managed to, well, manage, for several years as a Decepticon. He could do the same working with Autobots.

Chapter Text

Things had been quiet for a few days. It had been pleasant for most, but for Starscream, it was unnerving. The war had always kept him on his peds, alert constantly, especially during his time as a neutral rogue and defector. That feeling of some unknown danger looming above him never left, not even for the stellar cycles when he was alone on his ship. So the quiet and peace was not something he enjoyed, it was something he feared. Starscream never knew what happened after the calm, but usually, it was always some turbulent and violent storm threatening to rip him apart. 

He fidgeted with his claws, sharp tips drumming over his servos, denta pressing harshly against the inside of his mouth, and it was a wonder Energon hadn’t burst out from the pressure. He had zoned out of whatever Strongarm was babbling about, too preoccupied with his own worry, the fears that whispered into his processor and made him paranoid. The lack of recharge was starting to affect him, but he’d never admit it. Not unless it was pounded out of him. 

“Starscream?” 

He nearly jolted out of his own chassis when he heard his name aloud, red optics shot wide open in shock and surprise. Various sets of blue optics stared at him quizzically. He swallowed harshly, straightening himself out, trying to keep eye contact despite the embarrassment welling up in his spark. 

“Erm.. yes?” he questioned, anxiety and fear bouncing around in his mind. 

“Were you paying attention to my briefing on horses?” Strongarm asked, though there was a poisonous hint in her tone. Starscream gulped, not sure how to respond. Say yes and he might look like a fool if the bot chose to test his knowledge. Say no and she might get angry, and reassess her thoughts on him. 

“Ugh, who cares?!” Sideswipe groaned, smacking his forehead with his servo, before pointing accusingly at Strongarm, “you’re going to bore us all to death with this stupid lecture!”.

Starscream had to hold in his sigh of relief. Saved by the impatience of the red mech.  

“My lecture isn’t ‘stupid’, Sideswipe!” she retorted, shooting back up to stand straight, servos coming to rest on her hips, “many Decepticons we’ve faced have a resemblance to Earth’s animals, and learning about them can be crucial in combat!”.

“Yeah right!” he snapped, rolling his optics, “the only way to be prepared for combat is to actually train for combat! Geez!”. 

Sideswipe didn’t wait for Strongarm’s response, transforming into his chosen vehicle mode and speeding away, a trail of dust blowing from his tracks. Bumblebee groaned, rubbing his optics. Starscream pitied his leader. Though he was still so… unaccustomed to how Bumblebee dealt with his team. Sideswipe’s constant bickering and insubordination, as well as Strongarm’s constant need to bicker with the red bot, would have been met with a blaster to the face by Megatron. But Bumblebee was so… patient. It was unsettling; it was strange. He didn’t understand… 

Strongarm grumbled, stomping off elsewhere, to do other things. But not before eyeing the seeker spitefully. Starscream slightly curled inward, averting her gaze and staring at the ground with sudden interest. When he glanced back up to see her leave, he straightened himself up, nervously shuffling towards Bumblebee.

“Erm.. is there anything you need me to do, Lieutenant?” he asked, his claws picking nervously at the pain on his chassis, which no doubt Knockout would have scolded him for. 

“Oh! Starscream,” Bumblebee said, startled briefly, “um, no. Not really. But I want to ask, why are you always asking? Most of the team are happy with a break considering the work we have to do.”.

His body froze, tension creeping into his joints, and his eyes became fearful. Scrap. Had he messed up? He messed up, didn’t he? Something must have been wrong. 

“S-sorry, Ma– Lieutenant,” he apologized, biting the inside of his mouth, cursing himself for another stupid slip up, “I do not wish to be useless to you.”. 

Bumblebee was taken aback. Starscream’s behaviour had been odd to him. He’d expected the seeker to be well… how he was with Megatron. Biting back at authority, sneering and chuckling at failures, the usual Starscream behaviour. But he’d been so nervous and passive. It felt so out of place, and it didn’t fit well with Bumblebee. He tried extending a servo to Starscream’s shoulder but froze when the seeker flinched ever so slightly. He took a deep inhale and then spoke.

“Hey, you aren’t being useless at all Starscream,” he reassured, “actually quite the opposite. You’ve been really helpful and responsible, and I thank you for that.”. 

Starscream’s optics widened, clearly shocked with the response. This made Bumblebee’s spark twist further, concerned. 

“If there’s anything you want to tell me, anything at all,” Bumblebee said, a soothing and reassuring tone in his voice, “you can always tell me. You may be on probation, but you’re still one of the team. And I want you to feel comfortable here and with the rest of us.”.

Starscream was left lost for words, and could only nod.

Bumblebee tried for a small smile, unsure of how to approach Starscream in all honesty. He did want the seeker to be able to adjust, but well… he still wasn’t over many things. It would take a while to fully trust and care for Starscream on the same level as the rest of his team. But he could always try.

“Thank you,” the seeker muttered, bowing curtly before slowly walking off.

Chapter Text

“Freeze Decepticon!”

He did not freeze. Instead, he screamed, body diving into a pile of rubbish as a shot was fired, an explosion ringing out from where he was standing mere moments ago, smoke emanating from the shot. Starscream didn’t waste a second, scrambling to his pedes and shooting out of the other’s shooting range.

No no no to fragging Primus no! He thought, ducking behind a shelf as another shot blasted the ground.

“Unless you want to be smelted, I suggest you come out with your servos up, ‘Con!” she yelled, blasters at the ready.

“I am not a Decepticon you moron!” he snarled, almost about to transform his own servos into blasters… and then remembered this chassis didn’t have that modification and all his weapons had been confiscated.

He shot to his pedes and rolled away as another shot was fired, the red and black bot running and aiming a shot at where Starscream had previously been. She glared at the seeker, who had his fists raised in what could be considered a pathetic tactic of defence.

“Really?” she scoffed, “because those Decepticon insignias on your wings tell me a different story!”.

She fired again, missing the seeker as he tumbled away, and she growled in frustration. This was going nowhere. She switched her blasters back into servos, and leapt at the seeker, managing to tackle him to the ground. He yelped, crashing to the ground, disoriented for a brief second. That brief second was all she needed to whip out her weapon, pressing it right against Starscream’s throat. He froze, red eyes widening and staring down at the blade with fear.

“I said freeze,” she hissed, “looks like it takes a weapon to your throat for you to listen, huh ‘Con?”

Starscream’s fear soon turned to anger, and he spat out a retort.

“And I said I wasn’t a Decepticon!” he snapped, “It all has a nice perfect and simple explanation for even the daftest of bots, which includes you!”

She had just about enough of the seeker, raising her fist to knock the bastard unconscious when a set of peds stomped to a stop behind her.

“Woah Woah Woah stop!” Bumblebee yelled, shaking his servos, “Windblade please stand down! We can explain this, just let Starscream go!”.

Windblade froze, crystal blue optics switching between looking at Starscream below her, to the Autobot team. She was sceptical.

“Windblade, please” Sideswipe begged, “we can talk this out, just let Old Screamy go.”.

Starscream gave Sideswipe a dirty glare at the nickname, but the feeling soon vanished when he felt the pressure of the weapon that had been pressed tightly against his neck disappear. He let out a weak sigh of relief, helm dropping to the floor with a small audible thud . The weight of Windblade kneeling on his chest also vanished, the bot now standing over his lying form.

“Alright,” Windblade sighed, “explain. Because I am pretty confused here, Slick.”.

… 

“– And now, Starscream is under probation on my watch,” Bumblebee explained, “which is why we haven’t given him Autobot insignias yet. But he isn’t a threat and pretty useful.”.

Windblade said nothing, servo holding her face as she looked at the yellow mech, taking in all the information he had provided her. She glanced at the seeker she had chased and attacked earlier, whose name was Starscream, to find he was glaring at her angrily. She sighed, optics turning back to the Autobot leader, standing up and letting her servos come to rest on her cocked hips.

“Alright, understood. Screamy here is being tested on whether or not he can be a good little bot,” she said, smirking as the seeker grumbled in protest of the nickname, “and until he proves otherwise, he’s in your good books. That right?”

Bumblebee nodded. “Pretty much, yeah.”.

“Got it,” she said. 

Starscream’s red optics rested on the ground, only looking upwards when the sound of peds coming his way were heard. He saw the flyer, Windblade was her name, come towards him. She had an irritatingly smug expression on her faceplates, extending one servo in the seeker’s direction.

“Seems like we started on the wrong foot, Screamy,” she chuckled, “so sorry about that.”.

Starscream grumbled again, staring sourly at her servo, before reluctantly shaking it. He only did so for a few seconds before letting go, arms crossing over his cockpit as he stood.

“Sure sure,” he muttered, “but don’t call me ‘Screamy’. It’s bad enough having Sideswipe call me ‘Old Screamer’. I’m not even that old.”.

Windblade giggled again, much to Starscream’s distaste, smiling smugly.

“Sorry, it’s just stuck to me ya know?” she said, “if it’ll make you feel any better, you can give me a nickname.”.

Starscream let out a sly chuckle. “Anything?” he sneered.

“Anything,” she said, smiling slyly in retort.

“Alright,” he said, red optics boring into her blue ones, “how’s ‘Windbag’?”.

“Starscream–” Bumblebee started but got interrupted by a burst of laughter from the red and black flier.

“Alright fair,” Windblade giggled, then smirked “Screamy.”.

Starscream smirked back, his denta gritting together. 

Bumblebee stood a few meters away from the pair, staring at them rather uncomfortably. He was unsure what their behaviour meant… 

“So, um,” he started, the discomfort evident in his voice, “you two getting along?”.

Windblade crossed her arms over her chest, smug smirk still plastered on her face.

“Oh yeah, Screamy and I are getting on just fine, Yellow,” she replied, her smile widening at the seeker’s chuckle.

Starscream could agree on that. He enjoyed having someone who could match his snark and someone who was a flyer. As long as Windblade didn’t threaten his position with the Autobots, he would get along just fine with her.

Chapter Text

The blue and white bot scoffed, crossing her arms, glaring at the red and black flyer. She’d shown up out of Primus knows where, and now she acted like she’d been here for months! Strongarm wasn’t liking how the team’s new addition was acting, nor how the team was treating her.

“Someone’s jealous,” a voice snarked, making her jump and spin around.

She saw the fake-innocent face of Starscream, who was smiling in a sweet yet smug manner. She pouted, eyes narrowing as she growled.

“I am not jealous,” she grunted, “but come on! I’d expect you of all mechs to be unhappy about Windblade!” 

“How come?” he shrugged, “we get along just fine, it’s nice to have someone who flies around for once. The only ones I really had apart from the Vehicons and Eradicons were Lord Megatron and Soundwave. And well, neither were my bestest buddies in the world.”. 

“Probably because you kept trying to backstab Megatron,” she scoffed.

Starscream’s smile turned into a frown.

“That’s not the only reason why,” he muttered under his breath, “but anyway, having another flyer is nice. Why would I ever dislike having someone who doesn’t like rolling in the dirt?”.

“So you aren’t concerned she might replace you?” Strongarm asked, not out of malice, but rather speaking from a tactical point. 

“W-what?” he said, the confident edge in his voice disappearing and replaced with concern. “B-but that isn’t going to happen… right?”.

No. 

It couldn’t happen, not after everything. Would he really get chucked into a pod and replaced by Windblade? Was his only reason for not being a prisoner because of his flight ability? That… that couldn’t be it, right? 

Of course it is.

Shut up.

You’ve known all this time that you are only here because of how useful you make yourself.

Stop it.

Windblade will join the team, and you’ll be put where you belong. In a stasis pod.

I SAID STOP.

You’re still worthless.

… 

Starscream paced nervously, chewing on his claws, unable to get the horridly possible thoughts out of his mind. His lieutenant had already left with the team, and despite Starscream asking (which really was more like pleading) if he needed backup, his superior had refused him and told him he did not need him for this mission. This did nothing to quell the bubbling pit of fear settling in the seeker’s spark, rather making his tank churn with unease and worry. If Strongarm was right, and the team preferred Windblade, he would get tossed in the next cell back for Cybertron. He could practically hear Megatron’s terrible laughter in his audials, making him bite down harder on his digits.

Scrap scrap scrap, he thought, processor racing with the worst possible scenarios, I’m done for. I am never going to get a chance to redeem myself, I’m just going to get sidelined and discarded for Windblade! Even after all I did to prove myself… 

He bit back a whimper, the gravity of his situation settling in uncomfortably. This was bad. Very very bad. And what could Starscream do? Sure he could try and get rid of Windblade to secure himself, but if the Autobots found out, that would do more harm than good. And he liked Windblade… but… 

He whined in frustration, his processor muddled with too many thoughts overlapping and giving him a processor-ache. He curled up on the ground, starting to tremble harder. He didn’t know what in Primus he was going to do. 

He felt utterly helpless, unable to accept that this is where everything ended for him.

… 

It took a few hours before Bumblebee and the rest of the team returned to base, lugging a Decepticon captive with them. Starscream fidgeted with his servos, keeping them behind his back as to hide the small dents made by him constant and stressful gnawing. To say he was terrified was an understatement, he just hid it well. He had to. He couldn’t show weakness, especially not now of all times. 

Bumblebee was nervous. Starscream was acting strange, nervous and jumpy, and his red optics seemed to cling to Bumblebee, a raw fear in them that no matter how hard the seeker tried, he could not hide. Once Grimlock had stashed Zizza into a stasis pod, most of the team turned to Windblade. He made an offer for her to join their team. It would be in all their best interests to have a bot like Windblade on their side, and two flyers would be amazing. However, he noticed that when he asked Windblade as much, the fear in Starscream’s eyes increased, and he could see a light tremble settle into the bot’s body. He didn’t understand. Didn’t Starscream act nice to Windblade? Were they not getting along? 

“Thanks Bee,” Windblade said, smiling genuinely, “but I gotta pass. Got a few of my own missions I gotta do. Besides, you already got yourself one snarky seeker, you really wanna take on two?”.

Bumblebee was somewhat surprised by her response, but well, he was understanding. He also saw the shakiness, the fear, and all the unease in Starscream turn into an unbelieving shock. The trembling stopped, Starscream’s worried expression becoming dumbfounded. He almost looked relieved. 

Sideswipe had pleaded for her to stay, but she still denied the offer, and she made her amends with Strongarm, the team making arrangements for another meet-up of whatever force Optimus had warned them about, before she transformed and flew off. Bumblebee sighed, optics turning back to Starscream. The seeker seemed more relaxed, as if coming out of a grand shock. Bumblebee was put off. 

“Hey, Starscream,” Bumblebee said, catching the seeker’s attention, red optics looking at him, “Can I discuss something with you?”.

Chapter Text

“Well, here we are,” Starscream stated, arms spreading as he gazed up at his warship, “my ship. What was it that you needed from it again?”.

“The energon, groundbridge, and well,” Bumblebee said, “it would be to our advantage to have a ship as well as our base of operation. Though you’ll need to help me with that, I’m not used to navigating big ships.”.

“Of course, Lieutenant,” the seeker responded, “I will help you with anything you need.”.

Bumblebee let a small fragile smile onto his faceplates. It wasn’t entirely a lie. He did need the ship, and it would be really useful for his team. But… he needed to start being a better leader to Starscream. And well, he thought it best to not do this in front of everyone else. 

So he let Starscream lead him inside the ship, listening to the seeker explain the ship’s structure and where everything was located.

“So here’s the med-bay,” Starscream said, pointing to the left of the ship. Two mechanical doors had been pulled shut, so Bumblebee couldn’t peer in.

“I got quite the scare in there when the team and I got stuck in here,” Bumblebee chuckled, although rather nervous, “why did you keep your old chassis in there?”.

Starscream froze, and then chuckled nervously.

“Oh,” he said, smiling shaky and anxiously, “ahahah.. You saw that. Erm, well, I wanted to see if I could fix it or not. But well, it’s well over repairs, just some metal scraps now…”. 

Bumblebee felt his spark drop a bit, and his smile became a guilty frown.

“Starscream… I…,” he started, trying to find words to express what he wanted to say. A simple ‘I’m sorry’ didn’t feel appropriate. “I… we shouldn’t have left you to the Predacons… we could have stopped that… maybe given you redemption earlier instead of letting you wander in space for so long… I’m so sorry…”.

Starscream was silent for a brief period of time, before he sighed, red optics turning back to Bumblebee. 

“I… well thanks,” he sighed, “look I’m not very good at feelings and apologies and stuff. It’s very new to see bots being so… open with their emotions and personalities. I… on the Nemesis, one was careful to share such bonds with others. Never knew who you could trust.”. 

Bumblebee sighed, giving a nod, though guilt still lingered. He was, however, a twinge surprised about what Starscream had said. Sure he never took the Cons for fuzzy and warm hearted, but the distrust and hiding of emotions… he guessed it was just so different compared to Team Prime, which was a tight knit group that felt more like a family than anything else. But the Decepticons were never really like that, were they? 

Starscream coughed, and Bumblebee snapped out of his thoughts. 

"Well, moving on, uh," Starscream started, wanting to change the awkward situation, "the command room is down there," the seeker pointed down the hallway to the last room on the right, "and the energon storage is right next to us.".

Bumblebee nodded. "Thanks.".

"Just know that the Energon is, ah," Starscream chuckled, "smaller stash than what is required to fully operate the ship. Which is why I landed on this planet in the first place. I know a few mines and places where we can find more Energon.".

"That's greatly appreciated, Starscream," he thanked, but then his voice became… more serious, "I also wanted to talk to you about something else.".

Starscream's tank did a small flip flop. He gulped lightly, red eyes widening ever so slightly. 

"Oh," he said, an anxiety slowly seeping into his voice, "you didn't just want me to show you the ship, did you?". 

"No,” Bumblebee answered, “there’s something I wanted to discuss with you, about your… behaviour.”.

Before Bumblebee could say anything else, he could see Starscream's intakes begin to become more rapid, his eyes widening in a terrible fright, body starting to tremble subtly. Bumblebee was confused. What had he said to get such a scared reaction? 

Starscream whimpered, and when Bumblebee moved forward, trying to give the seeker some physical comfort, Starscream flinched, stumbling back, eyes now in a panic. One thought ran through his processor, screaming the message into his very spark. 

You did something wrong. He's going to hurt you. Like Megatron. 

“Starscream, wait,” Bumblebee said, starting to back away, trying to find some way to calm the situation and the seeker, “I’m not going to hurt you okay? I’m not going to do anything to you I swear. Look.”. 

He walked back, now a good few meters from Starscream, servos raised to show no ill will. Starscream was still pressed tight against the opposite wall, chassis shivering and trembling as his optics stared at Bumblebee in a wild, terrified panic. 

“P-please don’t–,” the seeker choked out, “please don’t hurt me Master.”.

Bumblebee froze. His joints locked in place, blue eyes widening. Starscream shrunk back, sinking down till he was kneeling on the ground, back still pressed tight against the wall, eyes locked with Bumblebee with a silent beg for mercy. He called Bumblebee ‘Master’. He… he thought Bumblebee was going to hurt him. 

“Starscream…” Bumblebee whispered, a twinge of guilt in his tone, “I’m not going to hurt you, okay? I’m not going to hurt you.”.

Starscream whimpered, the yellow bot inching slowly towards the seeker, stopping anytime the seeker flinched. Ever so slowly, he made his way to the seeker, and gently, his digits brushed over the seeker’s shoulder-pad, blue eyes full of sympathy and comfort. He wanted the seeker to know he meant him no harm, that he wanted to help. 

Starscream was quiet, his intakes calming ever so often. Soon, the trembling in his chassis ceased, and the seeker let out a sigh. The terrified look in his red optics subsided, now replaced with a look of embarrassment. 

“S-sorry,” the seeker muttered, “that was utterly pathetic of me.”. 

“What?” Bumblebee asked, genuine confusion and even… worry in his voice, “Starscream, it isn’t pathetic, okay? You were scared, fear isn’t pathetic. I think I should have been clearer when saying that I wanted to talk about you, that’s my fault and I’m sorry. You didn’t do anything wrong, Starscream, I wasn’t angry. I was just… concerned.”.

Now Starscream was confused.

The Autobots were… so strange to him.

Chapter Text

He put the cube down next to the other pile, sighing. He looked back at Bumblebee, a small wave of embarrassment overcoming him. He felt like a fool for his pathetic display before, showing how weak he was. He hated it. He was sure that his Lieutenant was harbouring some disappointment with him, some resentment or anger for his stupid little panic. His red optics drooped, a soft red glow on the floor. 

“Starscream,” Bumblebee started, putting down a cube next to the pile, before turning his attention to the seeker, “when I meant your behaviour, I meant it out of a place of concern, not anger. I want you to know that I don’t want to hurt you, I want to help you.”. 

“I…,” he trailed off, “I don’t understand… why do you care so much about my… ‘feelings’.”.

Bumblebee was quiet. Starscream swore he said something wrong, an apology about to roll off his tongue, before the yellow mech spoke again.

“Because you deserve to express your feelings,” Bumblebee said, “this isn’t the Decepticons, Starscream. This is the Autobots, and Autobots care about each other. We don’t hide emotions, and I’m… sorry that’s what you’ve had to endure for so long. I want to know so I can help you. I won’t take advantage of you, or use any of what you say against me. I promise.”.

“It…” Starscream sighed, shoulders dropping down, helm drooping as his gaze fixated on the ground. Then he let out a dry chuckle. “It’s not that easy.”.

Bumblebee didn’t know how to respond. He didn’t need to.

“Being in the Decepticons, seeing Megatron on the daily,” the seeker began, an angry edge in his voice directed at the former warlord, “it leaves a deep impression that can’t just- vanish in a couple of days. I cannot just tumble down the walls I built up millenia after millenia, I cannot change what I have adjusted to in a short span of time. I don’t believe in trust, in help, because trust got nobody nowhere except into the med bay in pieces. I… I want to believe that you want to help… I really do… but I cannot. I am sorry but… I just can’t. I’m not ready, not yet. I don’t know if I ever will be…”.

Bumblebee was speechless once more. He had to really take in Starscream’s words. It was… naive to think everything would change in just a few days. That everything would go from strange and awkward to perfectly functional in a short span of time. Starscream needed more help than he could really give. And honestly, he didn’t know if even he was ready to hear everything Starscream had to say. 

“Take your time then,” Bumblebee said reassuringly, “I won’t force an answer out of you. But I will do anything I can to help you adjust. You won’t trust me now, might not for a while, but that’s okay. I’ll wait for you. I’ll wait for you to be ready, and I’ll do so patiently.”.

The seeker was silent.

Then he started to cry. 

Bumblebee didn’t say anything, allowing the seeker to let out small, choked sobs. He let the seeker bury his helm into his shoulder, let him cry and weep for as long as he needed. He said nothing, only let the seeker express himself.

He was telling the truth, when he wanted to help Starscream. He knew that the seeker had a while to go for redemption, that this was only the first step. That Cliffjumper’s death would be there in his processor and would not leave. That it could not be fixed. Maybe other bots would not forgive Starscream. 

But the first step was taken by Starscream. Starscream had wanted to change, Starscream had come to him expecting no reward to be found, and Starscream had sought out his own redemption. And Bumblebee was not going to deny him that redemption. It wasn’t a perfect road, and he did not know where it would take any of them. But he was willing to see it through. Not for ideology, not for someone else. But because Bumblebee wanted to. 

He would help Starscream, no matter what it took.

Everyone deserves a second chance, and Starscream was no different.

Chapter Text

Starscream was antsy. 

When Bumblebee had proposed for the team to have a vacation, he did not expect it to turn into his first mission. And the setting didn’t help. Currently, he was standing, all his joints locked in place as if he was frozen, red optics open wide in a panic. He gazed into the shadowy maw of a cave, a primal, raw fear alight in his spark. He could almost envision the same damn cave as before, the way it was dimly lit by the grey sky and dark clouds, the chill of the wind slicing across his silver armour, the tremble of the ground under Megatron’s pedes. That horrible rush of deja-vu paralyzed him, his breathing becoming slightly more rapid. 

- “There’s nothing left!” -

- “Indulge me Starscream, won’t you?” -

Starscream shivered, a gulp sliding down his throat. He shook himself off, forcing his red optics to look away from the cave, staring at the landscape behind him. It was hot and sunny, orange and red rocks surrounding the area, a bright blue sky and soft white clouds. 

No trees, no dark clouds, no grey sky , he muttered to himself, it’s not the same cave, completely different cave . 

“What did you say, Screamer?”

His red optics widened, realizing he said all that aloud. He looked at the mech who spoke, seeing Sideswipe give him a questioning glance.

“Oh uh,” he muttered, before rolling his shoulders back and simply eyeing Sideswipe, “nothing for you to bother me over. Just observing the cave, that's all.”. 

“Sheesh okay,” Sideswipe retorted, raising his servos in defeat as he stepped into the cave. 

Starscream’s attention returned to the cave, and he sucked in a deep intake, mustering all his strength into his pedes as he stepped forward. His right pede touched the entrance of the cave ground, and with a low, barely audible whimper, he took more steps inside.

It’s just a stupid cave , he thought, practically growling at himself in his processor, nothing is coming out of the shadows to spook you. Megatron isn’t in this cave, he’s far far away playing peek a boo in space. Not in this cave, so stop being such a stupid coward.

He was now fully inside the cave, and it took all of him to not sprint back out and away from this horrid place. He looked around for his team… and found no one. Instead, he found five more cave entrances, paths leading in different directions. Anyone could have gone anywhere. And he was alone. 

Panic swelled back up inside him, his intakes once again becoming stressed and short, his spark heaving in his chest, as if it was preparing to leap out. 

“It’s alright, it’s alright,” he muttered, practically lying to himself, “you’re alone, you’re just alone, in a cave, without anyone around. B-but hey, being alone means no Megatron. No Megatron means you’re safe. You’re fine, just, just pick a tunnel and walk. You’ll find someone, you’ll find them no problem.”.

A small nervous chuckle made its way from his voice box, and he nervously shuffled to one on the left, red optics swimming around and taking in every detail of the cave, hoping he knew how to get back out. The deeper he went, the darker the tunnel became, shades of brown and grey turning into shades of black. It was as if the light were being sucked out as if he were entering the maw of some great beast.

Stop thinking that! He thought, scolding himself, There are no fragging monsters and there is no fragging Megatron! So stop being such a damn coward!

He walked further down the tunnel, now the only light coming from his red optics, two faint red lights on the ground from the illumination. He walked further and further, ignoring the faint noises and terror inching close to his spark. Soon, he started to see the tunnel in front of him… become more clear. There was light. Which meant he was close to some sort of opening. Eager to escape this nightmare, he trudged forward. The closer he got to the light, the clearer his surroundings became. He walked more and more until– 

He was in a cave. Another damn cave.

Then there was a tremble in the ground. His entire chassis froze, a terrible horror snatching his spark. No. No no no no no no no. He started to tremble, the sound of very very large pedsteps becoming audible. His intakes started becoming faster and faster, hyperventilating. He twisted around, red optics wide and shaken as they stared into the darkness, the ground still rattling from the impact of the pedes. 

Then a figure stepped out of the darkness.

The armour was sharp and silver, shining and reflecting the rock of the cave. The canon was charged, clawed servos scrunched into fists. And two, piercing red optics glared right at him.

“Starscream.”.

Megatron was here.

Chapter Text

A wave of terror consumed him. Any rationality started to fade at a rapid pace, his chassis shaking in a horrid fright at the sight of the warlord before him. It was all so familiar. The cave caged him in, the symmetrical scars on the warlord’s face, the furious glint in his red optics, the snarl on his lip plates that revealed his sharp angry dentae. The canon was charged, he knew from the light, even when the familiar heat or hum of the blaster was unheard, most likely he was panicking horribly, he saw the way the light of the blaster shone dangerously. 

“Starscream,” the warlord growled, his voice still having that silky yet sharp edge to it. 

“M-Megatron,” the seeker stuttered, his red optics wide in fear, “y-you can’t– this can’t– it’s not real. This– this is just a bad dream– a bad bad dream and I’ll wake up any moment–”.

A bitter cold laugh came from the warlord, freezing the seeker’s joints and making his optics grow even wider. 

“I can assure you, dear Starscream,” the warlord purred, making the seeker’s armour grow cold, “this is very much real.”.

With that sentence, Starscream felt something smash right into his faceplates, sending him staggering and crashing to the ground with a loud thud. He gasped momentarily, stunned and dazed, his vision swimming and spinning, nothing clear. He shook his helm, slowly coming to his senses. He felt something trickle down the side of this cheek and wiped it with his servo. The blue liquid was unmistakable. Energon. Megatron never drew Energon in the dreams. And no matter the dream, it never felt that vivid.

This was no dream. 

The realization hit him like the punch he had just received, and the true weight of the situation settled uncomfortably in his spark. His panic optics landed on Megatron, the warlord towering over him with a cold, harsh glare.

He’s going to punish you.

“N-no,” the seeker choked out, starting to scramble backwards, the tremble returning to his chassis, “No please– no no please– this– no– No!”.

He scrambled to his pedes, intent on running, only succeeding in slamming into the cave wall, collapsing onto the ground again. He pressed himself flat against the wall, red optics not leaving Megatron for a second. The warlord kept advancing on him, his large pedes thundering on the ground, making the seeker whimper and yelp. Finally, there was no more space between them, the warlord’s pede slamming roughly onto his cockpit, making the seeker choke out a strangled cry.

“You’ve become so weak, Starscream,” Megatron snarled, kneeling onto the seeker’s cockpit, faceplate now inches from the seeker’s terrified face. He trailed a large claw along the seeker’s faceplates, the sound of metal scraping metal ringing out in the small cave. Starscream let out a whimper, his helm trying to wiggle away from the claw that was now trailing down to the bottom of his chin. The warlord inched Starscream’s helm closer, red angry optics boring into the seeker with a mild hatred. Starscream started to wail. 

“Please please please– go away go away go away!” the seeker cried out, trying to squirm out from under the warlord, but only screamed when the knee pressed harder against his cockpit, and he started to sob, “please let me go! Please I’m sorry I’m so sorry Master! Please just leave me alone! Please!”. 

“You’re such a pathetic coward, Starscream,” Megatron scowled, “you were always so worthless.”.

Worthless.  

“You have ceased to be of use to me, Starscream–”

No. 

“– so you shall simply cease to be.”

No. 

He screamed. All the frustration and terror was finally let loose, and the seeker screamed and wailed in fright and agony. He couldn’t take it anymore, he’d been pushed too far. He was reduced to a screaming, squirming and sobbing mess. 

He didn’t even notice the yells, the shouting. He didn’t notice the weight on his cockpit disappearing, the claw leaving the bottom of his chin. He didn’t notice the shifting, the frame changing several times. He did not notice the shifter being beaten to a pulp. Nor did he notice the lubricant staining his faceplates. Or the loose rock that unlodged and smashed into his helm, making his vision go black.

… 

The first thing he noticed when he awoke was aching in his processor. He groaned, vision blurry, noises muffled. He felt like he’d been swung around before being tossed against a wall. His vision swam momentarily before his vision slowly began clearing up. He noticed the night sky above him, a thousand stars littering the dark abyss above, and the feeling of wet faceplates. He realized he was leaking lubricant, and lazily swatted at his face to clean it off. 

“Mrrhhgg,” he groaned, his body wobbling as he sat upright, “whaaa?”.

“Woah Woah Woah,” came a voice, a yellow shape approaching him, placing a servo gently on his cockpit, “easy, Starscream. You got hit in the head by a rather large chunk of rock, you should rest.”.

“Rock?” he mumbled. Then, his processor slowly started piecing together the events that had recently occurred. 

The cave. The tunnel. Megatron.

His panic suddenly returned, and he flailed around before falling onto the ground, the panic making adrenaline course through his spark.

“Meg–” he yelped, “Megatron– Megatron was–”.

“It wasn’t Megatron.”.

That made him freeze. 

“What?” 

“The Decepticon you saw was Pseduo,” Bumblebee explained, “he was one of Megatron’s spies during the war. He took Megatron’s form, I’m guessing to disorient you.”.

A sudden burst of shame settled into his spark. He’d had that outburst, wailed and flailed like a scraplet, making himself so vulnerable and weak, showing his entire team his spark wrenching terror of ever being near Megatron. And he’d done that all for nothing. It wasn’t even the real Megatron. Just some stupid shifter from the war who didn’t like him and frightened him. He felt anger blossom out of his shame, and he smacked himself across the faceplates, ignoring the look of shock that crossed Bumblebee’s face.

“Starscream–” 

“I was so stupid.”.

Bumblebee didn’t know how to respond. His mouth just kept opening and closing like fish. Eventually, when the seeker crawled back onto the medical berth and shut his optics, the yellow bot just sighed, giving up. He couldn’t help the seeker if he wouldn’t listen.

You know what happens now.

Shut up , he thought, the last thing I need is you. Get out of my fragging processor. 

He curled into a ball, just trying to rid himself of the shame and anger he felt. 

Why did he mess everything up?

Chapter Text

Starscream was cleared from the med bay after two days and was left alone for the most part. He stayed in one corner of the scrapyard, curled into a ball and refusing to talk to anyone. He still felt ashamed, felt angry at himself. He felt so stupid, so foolish for acting the way he did at the cave. The dreams had all but become worse, more rampant. He woke up in a cold sweat, and then immediately started to cry. Like an idiot. 

The days had gone by rather quickly since he did nothing. The nagging voice in his processor told him if he wasn’t useful, he would be chucked out. But at this point, he was too messed up to care. Let them throw him in a stasis pod. At least that would end his misery. 

He hated how his efforts of ‘redemption’ were going. What an amazing plan, after all, it was going to scrap pretty quick. He couldn’t ever escape Megatron’s shadow, could he? No matter what he did, he knew at some point he would return to grovelling under his former– no. His Master’s pedes. Try as he might, he will never escape Megatron. Might as well make his peace with it. He just wished the small flicker of hope would die already.

…

The day soon became… odd. The first notable event was that Sideswipe and Strongarm were late from training. It was only later when the team received a distress call from Strongarm that things started to go downhill fast. The distress call had been abruptly been called short, thus leading everyone to believe that they had both been captured by Steeljaw’s pack. As such, their course of action was rather clear; mount a rescue. 

It was surprisingly easy for the orange minicon to find their possible base of operations, and the team soon had a fixed location on the group of ‘Decepticons’. Bumblebee and the others were already ready to go in all guns blazing before the whirring of engines caught their attention. 

“What the–” 

A familiar red and black jet dropped from the sky, transforming and landing on her pedes, a cocky smile on her faceplates. When made aware of the situation, she offered to join their team for the mission. And thus it seemed like all were ready to embark on their mission.

All except Starscream, of course.

“Given what happened a few days ago…” Bumblebee started, “I think it best for you to remain here with Fixit, Denny and Russel. Besides, they could use someone if there are any problems at base.”.

Starscream didn’t argue. And really, he didn’t feel like he could. Especially ‘given what happened a few days ago’. He simply nodded, sighing when his leader left with the rest of the team. Leaving him here, with two humans and a minicon. 

Then things took an… interesting turn

It had been about an hour or two since the team had departed on their rescue mission, leaving the seeker and their smaller team members to their own devices. Starscream had been minding his own business, rather unfocused on his surroundings, processor an inferno of thoughts. The first thing that snapped him out of his daze, however, was yelling. Immediately, as if a reflex, he stood, about to rush in, before just catching himself.

Don’t rush in without a plan, moron.

Instead of charging like an idiot, he crept towards where the noise came from. Soon, a voice became clear. It wasn’t a voice he recognized, and so, must have been an intruder. He peeked, red optics staring at the new mech standing, blaster at the ready, who appeared to be demanding something from Fix-It. Well, whatever he was going to force the minicon to do wasn’t good, so it wasn’t a stretch of the imagination for Starscream to conclude he should help them. That and they were his teammates.

… 

After another snappy demand from the purple Decepticon to open the stasis pods, Starscream decided it was time to make himself known. And he did so by leaping out from his spot, right over the Decepticon, and smashing his servo right into the other’s faceplates. The impact of the blow sent the mech rocketing into a pile of scrap, debris and bits bursting outwards and raining down on them. The humans yelped, scurrying away from what was now basically a battlefield. Starscream mentally cursed his actions. He needed to consider the humans and their lives. 

How did the Autobots manage this before? He groaned to himself, especially with that annoying one with the pigtails.

He didn’t dwell too harshly on his thoughts when the Decepticon rose from the debris, rubbing his aching jaw. He glared daggers at the seeker, servos curling into fists. The seeker only smirked, cocking his hips, before he made a ‘come’ motion. That pissed the mech enough. Good. 

“That hurt you bastard!” he snarled, leaping at Starscream, trying to land a blow on the seeker.

“Good!” the seeker snapped, “it means I can punch better than you!”.

The mech snarled again, throwing his pede out in an attempt to kick the seeker. Starscream took the opportunity to instead grab the pede with his servos, holding it in place as he dug his pedes into the ground. He smirked, tightening and strengthening the grip on the mech’s pedes, and with considerable strength, threw the mech over his helm and crashed him into the ground. The ground trembled from the impact of the manoeuvre, making the humans and minicon stumble. 

“S-Starscream!” Fix-it yelped, “get him out of the command centre! Your fight could damage our equipment!”.

“Yeah yeah,” he sighed, “I got it.”.

He walked over to the slumped form of the mech, seeing him trying to get to his pedes. Starscream chuckled.

“Still have some fight left in you I see,” he said, smirk not leaving his face, “here, let me help you up.”.

He grabbed onto the mech’s shoulders, thrusting him forward, right into the seeker’s knee. The sound of metal against metal echoed out, making the minicon wince. The Decepticon let out a grunt from the strength of the blow and was thus unprepared when the seeker grabbed him again, throwing him further from the command centre and into a shelf of objects, all of which shattered and smashed from the body of the mech slamming into them full force. Now it was Denny’s turn to wince.

The Decepticon rose to his feet once more, though his stance was now wobbly and uncoordinated. Starscream would have laughed, but he concentrated more on getting the Decepticon to go unconscious already. 

He landed another blow on the other’s abdomen and then planted a kick to the faceplates. The Deception cried out, servos rushing to his faceplates to protect it. His faceplates must be throbbing from the shock of the impact. Starscream put his servos on his hips, raising an optical ridge.

“Are you done?” he asked, “or do you intend to play pattycake with me for the rest of the day?”.

The Decepticon attempted a growl, but it came out more like a wobbly groan. He stumbled forward, a sloppy punch aimed for Starscream. It instead collided with a shelf, sending an array of pots and pans clattering to the ground. It was pathetic, and the seeker couldn’t hold back a small giggle.

“You punch like a scraplet!” he chuckled, “and they can’t even punch!”

The mech was clearly about to retort, but the seeker didn’t give him the chance, smashing a pede into his chassis, sending him to the ground. This time, he didn’t get back up.

Starscream rolled his shoulders, making his way to where the fallen Decepticon was, planting a foot on his chassis, leaning down. The mech groaned in pain, clearly in no condition to fight anymore. If he were still a Decepticon, this is where he would have utilized lethal force and smelted the sucker. But he was an Autobot now, and so he restored to a softer attack. 

Though it certainly didn’t feel soft for Fracture when the seeker grabbed him by the shoulders once more and slammed his helm full force into the other’s, forcing him to go unconscious from the sheer impact.

“That’s that done,” he grumbled, “now, where are your minicons?”.

He dragged the fallen form back towards the command centre, finding that Fix-It had (somehow) managed to take care of the troublesome pair. Starscream then took upon the task to shove the three of them into a stasis pod, sighing tiredly as that was over and done with.

“Well,” Denny said, scratching the back of his head awkwardly, “you certainly did a number on that guy.”.

Starscream shrugged, a small triumphant smile on his faceplates. 

“Yes, I suppose I did.”.

… 

This is where the interesting turn happened. Though ‘interesting' isn't the right word to describe it. ‘Making Starscream believe he has gone insane’ was a more accurate description.

Almost as soon as the Decepticon had been taken care of, there had been a sudden burst of bright, white light. The seeker was momentarily disoriented, and next thing he knew, a pede had slammed into his chassis, sending him to the ground, a pede now threatening to crush his cockpit. For a second, all he saw was grey and purple, a snarling faceplate, and a dark sword.

“Starscream?”

That was not the voice he was expecting.

He blinked again, and what he saw… confused him further. The mech before him was not grey and purple, he was red and blue. His faceplates weren’t curled into a snarl, they were stern and slightly shocked. There was no dark sword, rather a bright blue one.

“Optimus Prime?” he asked aloud, disbelief in his voice, “w-wait aren’t you– aren’t you supposed to be dead?”

Optimus was silent before he answered in his regular voice.

“I was about to ask you the same question.”.

Starscream let out a nervous chuckle. “It’s an, eh, interesting story.”.

Optimus would have asked more, but he reminded himself of just who the seeker was.

“What are you doing on Earth, Starscream?” he asked, his tone sterner.

Starscream let out a small, meek chuckle.

“That,” he said, “is another interesting story.”.

Before Optimus could respond, a small cry caught his attention.

“Wait!” Russell yelled, scurrying over to Starscream, “Don’t hurt him!”.

Optimus was surprised, to say the least. Starscream had never been one to care for humans, much less have one who would try to stop him from getting into harm’s way. Optimus did not lower or raise his sword, his optics returning to focus on Starscream.

“I see that this indeed,” he started, “is an interesting story.”.

Chapter Text

The further the battle progressed, the more went wrong. Thunderhoof and Underbite had proven to be more troublesome than Bumblebee or Drift expected, and currently, the fight was not going in their favour. A hit from Underbite had sent Drift sprawling across the ground, while Bumblebee was locked in a fight with Thunderhoof. He felt the larger mech tackle him to the ground, the impact sending a shockwave through his chassis, now aching slightly. The sound of splashing water was his indication that Grimlock had surfaced, as well as the Dinobot’s yells. 

“Grimlock,” he yelled, catching his teammate’s attention, “destroy the arch!”.

The Dinobot heard him, stomping over to where the steps to the arch were, only to get tackled, his pede trapped in Clampdown’s claws. He squirmed and struggled, trying to get the Decepticon to let go, but to no avail. The Autobots could currently do nothing, only being able to watch as Steeljaw added the finishing touches to the arch, to whatever machine he was building. Things were going bad real fast. However, soon enough, Bumblebee could hear the sound… of two engines.

His optics widened as he saw two flying forms rushing in, transforming and landing on the ground. There was Starscream… and there was Optimus. His mouth dropped open in shock, watching as his former team leader, his mentor, stood before him. Sure, he had seen Optimus in visions, but to see him here, alive, in a physical form in front of him, was almost unbelievable. He barely paid attention when Optimus charged at the arch, too lost in his own surprise to see the Prime alive. However, he came to attention rather fast when a strong burst of energy blasted Thunderhoof right off him, as well as threw him crashing into a tree, the branches splintering, one digging into his protoform. He let out a grunt, crashing back onto the ground. His whole chassis ached with pain from the blast, optics bleary, a grey, purple and black shape now standing where the charred remains of the arch once were. A cruel smile was on his faceplates, red optics blaring with malice. His words were garbled, muffled by the ringing in the yellow bot’s audial sensors. He saw the mech spread his arms, staring up at the sky as if declaring himself triumphant. 

“At long last,” the new mech boomed, “Megatronus stands Triumphant!”.

… 

Starscream’s red optics adjusted to his surroundings, finally coming online. He bit back a groan, looking around to see both Autobots and Decepticons sprawled, clearly all affected by the large blast of energy that had come from whatever the ‘Cons had been building. Now, from where it had once stood, was a mech… one who was similar. It was a strange feeling like he saw this mech before.

“ At long last ,” the new mech boomed, “ Megatronus stands Triumphant! ”.

Ah. There was a resemblance. This was the mech that his Master had taken his name from, one of the Thirteen Original Primes. But… that didn’t make much sense. Not in the context of– 

Now isn’t the time to start thinking about the fragging Primes.

He would dwell on that later. Right now doesn't seem like the right time to be debating on Megatronus, not in this situation at least. He instead made it a point to try and stand, shakily getting to his pedes. He saw others do the same, all slowly getting their bearings, trying to recover from the blast. Then all optics went on Megatronus. He heard muttering from where his team leader and Drift were, slowly shuffling towards them. He caught something that the orange and black mech said. 

“Fix-It,” he started, digit on his comm to contact the minicon, “is this Megatronus also known by the name Megatron?”.

“I can answer you that,” Starscream muttered, “trust me, much as he might wish, Megatron isn’t Megatronus. He named himself after the Prime, but they’re two different mechs.”.

Drift gave him a glance. Starscream gave him one back.

“What?” 

“How do you know that?”.

Starscream resisted the urge to roll his optics.

“It was common knowledge during the war,” he muttered, “besides, I was Megatron’s second, remember? I think I would know who is and isn’t my former master. I would also know that Megatron is more busy hitchhiking on some meteor or looking for purple rocks.”. 

Drift didn’t argue with that, only turning back to Megatronus.

“But then that raises the question of why a Prime would be a Decepticon,” Drift muttered, “it does not make sense.”.

That, Starscream could agree on. From all the times he’d heard Megatron babble on and on about the Prime, he knew quite a bit about the former Prime. He was renamed ‘The Fallen’ at one point and had exiled himself into deep space after killing Solus Prime. But… then that didn’t make sense. If Megatronus has exiled himself to repent for murdering her, why would he all of a sudden appear on Earth with what seemed to be a sinister goal in mind? Besides, the Primes existed long before the war, before the Decepticons even existed. So why would a Prime, who had not been seen since before Cybertronians were forged , be wearing a Decepticon insignia? Furthermore, why Earth? It didn’t make any sense, none at all. Was the tale of Megatronus a lie? Had it become twisted to paint the fallen Prime in a sympathetic light? Or… 

He did not ponder much on his theories. There were bigger problems at hand than a fable not making sense to reality. This Decepticon was a clear problem; that was all Starscream had to know. He snapped himself into focus, seeing his leader and Drift listening to Optimus Prime. He had given them instructions, freeing their teammates. He only followed Bumblebee and Drift, a nagging part of his processor trying to remember where he had seen this mech before. He knew he recognised him. Not just due to Megatron, but something else. Frustratingly enough, however, he couldn’t remember where he recognised him from. He saw Optimus charge at Megatronus, the two beginning to duel. 

Pay attention.

He looked away, transforming and flying upwards, managing to get up the statue, transforming again when he was where his teammates were tied. He stood back up, making his way towards them. He sliced through Sideswipe’s bindings first, gripping the mech momentarily to stop him from falling right off the statue. He was incredibly weak, given that he had been hit with both the energy stored in the arch and the blast from Megatronus’ arrival. Sideswipe groaned, gripping Starscream’s servo, slowly regaining his balance. He looked Starscream in the optics and winced.

“You’re not going to let me live this down, are you?”.

Starscream smirked.

“Nope.”.

He cut the bindings for Windblade and Strongarm as well, also helping in steading them. Strongarm slapped his servo away, leaning on the statue instead. He frowned.

“I don’t need your help,” Strongarm muttered, “I’ll be fine on my own.”.

Starscream rolled his optics.

“Sure you will,” he said, sarcasm dripping in his tone. 

… 

They were far from being out of the woods though. 

Megatronus was locked in a heated battle with Optimus, the rest of their teammates not doing much damage against the Decepticon. Even Optimus was struggling, both mechs trying their best to punch and kick and slice the other. Both had energon spilling from them, doing damage. Starscream simply focused on getting their teammates down the statue and staying out of the blaster range of the mech. He wouldn’t be very useful if he got hit by what he would assume to be one of the strongest weapons ever created. 

“We need a plan.” he heard Windblade mutter.

“I couldn’t agree more,” he agreed, “because blindly charging at an Ancient Prime much stronger and older than any of us seems like a very stupid plan.”.

As he spoke, Grimlock charged at Megatronus, only to get swung around and tossed into Drift, both of which crashed into another tree. He turned back to the rest of his team.

“And that’s a perfect demonstration of what I meant.”.

“Well, what can we do?” Sideswipe asked, “I mean like you just said, that’s a Prime right there. And I don’t want to get in the middle of two Primes duking it out. That just seems like the perfect way to get smelted.”.

Finally , he thought, an Autobot with at least half a processor.

However, he did not get time to express his thoughts outwardly, as right then, Optimus was sent flying right into the seeker, sending them both tumbling backwards onto the ground. He yelped and grunted, now squashed under the Prime. He flailed under Optimus, trying to squirm free. He wasn’t exactly a fan of being crushed by someone larger than him. Optimus groaned, slowly rising to his pedes, much to the seeker’s relief. Optimus looked down at Starscream, who was groaning as he wobbled around on the ground. 

“Apologies,” he said.

“Noooteeeed,” the seeker responded shakily, getting onto wobbly pedes, his left servo clutching his abdomen.

The Prime returned his attention to Megatronus, gaze becoming stern. He had some concerns of his own regarding the Decepticon. Things did not add up, and the other Primes vague wording did not help with that. He knew that Megatronus was the great evil he had to defeat, but it did not add up with what other Primes has said about the former Prime, nor what he had heard from the myths (or whenever Megatron had chosen to ramble at length about the Prime during his time as Orion Pax). Optimus was confused, to say the least. However, he pushed his thoughts aside, focusing on returning to the battle.

He charged at Megatronus once more, the two starting their clash again once more. However, Megatronus gained the upper hand, kicking Optimus hard and sending him rocketing into a body of water nearby. Megatronus’ attention was then diverted to a weapon Optimus dropped, walking towards it. It was within his reach, before fire from ahead scorched his plating, attention spinning away from the staff and to Windblade, who was raining heavy fire on the Decepticon. While that happened, Bumblebee ran to aid Optimus, while Drift fell back to their remaining teammates. Starscream was torn on what to do, all going wrong around him. Windblade was shot down, a sharp yelp was heard as she crashed to the ground. And while Drift, Sideswipe and Strongarm ran at Megatronus, the other Decepticons they had not taken into account sent them crashing through an intervention. Starscream opted to listen. He ran back behind the statue and did all he could to hear the conversation as best as possible.

“Consider those Autobots parked.”.

A terrible attempt at a comment but whatever.

“Well done.”. 

“Along with building the machines that brought you here, it was the least we could do. Now, shall, we discuss when exactly I will take possession of this world? As you promised?”.

Does that Decepticon want to take over Earth? Wow, he has bad taste in planets.

“You’ve earned your reward, Steeljaw, though I cannot imagine why you would want a pile of dust.”.

… oh boy.

It was quiet for a brief moment, confusion setting in before the Decepticon spoke.

“Dust?”

“This staff will first extract what remains of the Anti-spark from Unicron, lying dormant at the Earth’s core. Then I will summon the All Spark from Cybertron, and bring the two together.”.

There it was. There was what clicked for Starscream.

“But, combining the two sparks will blow both planets to–”.

Steeljaw did not finish his sentence, the sound of slamming and cracking now audible, as well as the sound of something charging . 

Alright, the listening time was over. This situation was dire. Very very dire.

He leapt out from his cover, seeing as Megatronus extracted the last wisps of the anti-spark, of Dark Energon, from the Earth.

“Precisely.”.

Chapter Text

This was when everything went horribly, horribly wrong. 

“You lied to us! To me!” Steeljaw roared, the fury of betrayal filling him as he charged Megatronus. It resulted in nothing, as the larger mech simply tossed him aside like a rag doll.

“I spoke only the truth,” he boomed, “you heard what you wanted to hear.”. 

Steeljaw growled, wobbling to his feet. He glared at his underlings.

“Don’t just stand there!” he barked.

The Decepticons looked from him to Megatronus, and very quickly made up their minds, running in the other direction. However, they ran straight into the Autobots, who had all since recovered from the Decepticons’ attacks. 

However, Starscream still did not know exactly what to do. His teammates were taking care of the Decepticons, and Megatronus was clearly distracted by Steeljaw frantically attacking him in a fit of rage. Should he help his team? Or should he take down Megatronus?

“Well standing here isn’t helping in either case,” he growled to himself. 

He looked at Megatronus and picked his course of action. He knew what he needed to do now. He knew who this mech really was. And with the information, he now knew what he had to do. 

Thank you, he thought, Shockwave.

He charged.

He transformed, flew straight at Megatronus. The mech was sufficiently distracted by Steeljaw that he did not notice the seeker until it was too late, a jet smashing into him. He only stumbled backwards slightly, dazed. Starscream transformed, though his face was completely stern.

“I know who you are,” he growled, “and I know who you are not .”.

The mech glared at him, the imitation of the Requiem blaster charging as he fired it. Starscream dodged, however, he could feel the intense heat of the blast rumble past his wing, slightly burning it. He grunted, optics locked on the mech’s insignia. He charged again, missing a blow.  But he continued to strike again and again, despite missing every single time.

“Megatronus wasn’t a Decepticon,” he grunted, “and you are not Megatronus!”.

It was true. The mech was now recognizable, the speech of his plan the last piece of the puzzle Starscream had tried to create. This mech was not, in fact, Megatronus. And Starscream now knew exactly how to defeat him. Well, more or less give or take. He leapt at the mech, claws trying to scrape at the insignia. He missed, and instead, a fist barrelled into him, sending him backwards. He crashed to the ground, grunting and holding his abdomen. 

“Fool,” Megatronus boomed, “did you truly believe you could defeat me?”.

Starscream got to his pedes, fixing his stance.

“Honestly?” he said, “not really. But it’s worth a shot.”. 

He really wished he had his weapons right now. They would make this so much easier. The thought clicked in his head, and he turned his helm away from Megatronus, searching for a specific bot. He found Optimus nearby, already helped up, Bumblebee close behind him. He fell back, retreating near them. Bumblebee gave him a look, about to speak.

“This isn’t Megatronus,” Starscream said, “I know this bot. It just took a while to pinpoint where I knew him from, and I know how to defeat him. Kind of, anyway.”.

“What? What do you mean he’s not–” Bumblebee started, but Optimus interrupted him.

“Starscream, what do you know?” he asked, voice firm.

“This bot isn’t the real Megatronus,” he stated again, “he’s one of Shockwave’s experiments, something we were working on during the war. He was artificially created, and his power comes from a set of minicons he’s merged with. However, Shockwave implanted him with something, a failsafe if you will. In theory, it can shut down the minicon power link, and render him without their power. I can explain more later if we survive this.”.

Optimus gave Starscream a glance, as did Bumblebee, both mechs clearly full of questions. The seeker couldn’t blame them; he’d just dropped this on them like a bomb. But the Prime straightened himself out, blue optics staring at the seeker’s red ones.

“So where is this failsafe?”

The seeker turned back to Megatronus, who had just gotten rid of Steeljaw by throwing the wolficon past a mountain. He then turned their attention back to them, blaster charging and ready to fire.

“His insignia,” the seeker stated, “aim for his insignia.”. 

Optimus nodded and charged at Megatronus once more. Bumblebee then went to help the rest of their team, leaving Starscream to follow close behind. His optics were pinned to Optimus, watching the Prime and the Decepticon as they exchanged blows, Optimus doing his best to hit Megatronus’ insignia. As the battle continued, the seeker saw Optimus was faltering. It wasn’t going to go well. Megatronus’ patience was also wavering, his desire to complete his goal making him become furious at being delayed. He managed to land a blow on the Prime, sending him backwards.

“Enough!” he roared, “I have grown tired of your attempts. I intend to finish you off for good!”

But instead of using the imitation of the Requiem blaster, he saw the Decepticon point the Spark Fuser, still holding the remains of Anti-spark, and the thrum as it got ready to blast. Megatronus was going to hit Optimus with Dark Energon. The blast fired.

“ NO! ”.

Optimus was suddenly thrown out the way, the blast missing him entirely, instead, hitting– 

“Starscream!” 

The seeker felt the blast against his chassis, and an explosion rang out, blasting him into a body of water, his cockpit shattering from the impact, shards of glass crashing and cracking, some embedding into his chassis. He let out a horrible strangled gasp, his chassis crackling with Dark Energon, body wracked with pain. He let out a pained shriek, the feeling of the substance in his chassis being the equivalent of being smelted, but so much worse. Everything hurt, pain was the only thing he knew at that moment. So much pain and agony wracking his body, his claws digging into any surface they could find, his cries becoming hoarse and filled with wrenching agony. Everything was just one painful blur, a never-ending nightmare of horror. He could do nothing but gasp and flail about as the Dark Energon wreaked havoc on his chassis. It almost made him wish for death. 

He screamed when he felt a servo pulling him up, the digits burning horribly against him, and he couldn’t tell what was happening anymore. He was dragged along, rasping horribly as he clawed for control, for his own body to stop hurting so much. He was crying, the lubricant feeling like acid running down his faceplates.

“Primus–” he choked out, “Primus help– please–”.

He could hear the sound of a ground bridge, but the pain was so overwhelming he was barely clinging to consciousness. All the voices around him had melted together, one writhing screaming mass. He wanted it to stop, to stop hurting, to stop making him wish for the release of death from this horrid agony. He couldn’t cling to reality for long. 

He blacked out.

Chapter Text

Bumblebee had been horrified when the seeker had thrown Optimus aside and even more horrified when the seeker was blown backwards with a burst of Dark Energon, blasting him into water. What was also horrifying was his screams of agony. Even after they’d carried him through the space bridge he continued to scream and wail, and it was so horrible. They brought him back to the scrapyard, but Bumblebee knew at once they did not have the materials to deal with Dark Energon injuries. But without treatment as soon as possible… the seeker would die. Starscream would die. Bumblebee had never thought he would be horrified at the idea of him dying, worried for his safety, but by Primus he was. He was so worried. But he knew he had to focus on the battle right now. He hoped they could stabilize him until they could find some way to help him. 

Megatronus was defeated, the Sparkfuser destroyed, and the team had managed to help Optimus plunge his sword into the Decepticon’s spark chamber, his insignia. As Starscream said, the connection to the minicons was severed, seven small multicoloured minicons suddenly bursting from Megatronus’ form, falling unconscious to the ground. Megatronus did not stay online for long, his spark chamber and powers gone, and his red optics flickered into darkness, his dead chassis falling limp on the ground. 

Most of the team stayed behind to clear up the mess, as well as take the unconscious Decepticons and the dead Megatronus out of the area. Bumblebee and Optimus however, returned to base as soon as possible. Starscream was on a medical berth, Fix-it worriedly looking at the seeker, and then at the two Autobots.

“It’s not good,” he said, “he’s… he’s not going to survive.”.

No. 

No. 

“There– there was to be something,” Bumblebee stuttered, “something we can do. We can’t just– we can’t let him die.”.

“Bumblebee,” Optimus said, “I believe there is someone who can help us.”.

… 

A faint beeping on one of the monitors caught his attention. He went over to check it, a click showing a red symbol pulsing slowly. He was both very surprised and concerned when he received a distress call. An Autobot distress call at that. To his knowledge, this base was the only Autobot one on Earth. Unless… 

He didn’t delve into his theories, instead of typing those coordinates into the ground bridge, preparing to fire it up.

“I’ve just received a distress call. I’m going to check it out, they might need medical attention, so prepare sickbay.”.

His partner gave him a look, both servos on his hips, which were slightly cocked. He shrugged.

“Whatever you say, good doctor.”.

The first mech grumbled at the nickname, powering up the ground bridge, the familiar swirl of green, blue and purple illuminating his white and orange plating. He transformed, driving through the portal, vanishing in a white flash, ending up on the other side, where the distress call had come from. He transformed again, optics scanning the scene. He let out a gasp.

“ Optimus ?!” he gasped, shock clear on his faceplates, “Is… is that really you–” 

A faint, strangled cry took him out of his shock, optics going over to a crumpled form of a mech. He recognized the frame after a few seconds of looking at it, the two Decepticon insignias stamped on either of the mech’s wings a clearer indication of their identity. Something, seemingly energy, crackled around the mech, who let out another hoarse cry of pain. His eyes turned back to two mechs he knew well enough. He wanted, needed, answers to this. He wanted to know what in Primus’ name was going on. But as a medic, he knew now wasn’t the time. He steeled himself.

“Come through,” he said, “he needs medical attention; now.”.

… 

The seeker was rushed to the med bay as soon as he was through the ground bridge. The Dark Energon in his chassis crackled again, eliciting another raspy wail from the seeker. He was placed on the medical berth, while another mech looked from Starscream to Ratchet to Optimus and Bumblebee. Before he could ask a single question, Ratchet shoved him aside and started gathering tools. He glared at the other and snapped.

“Well don’t just stand there!” he barked, “help me!”.

That snapped him out of his stupid gawking. He came to attention, helping with the procedure. He listened to all of Ratchet’s instructions, doing all that was asked. He stuck an Energon IV into the mech and prepped the mech to expel the Dark Energon. Once the procedure was complete, they could only wait and hope for the best. Now, was the time for questions.

“I assume you have many questions for me,” Optimus stated.

Ratchet gave him a glare. “You have no idea.”.

Optimus nodded, and Bumblebee stood next to him. He knew some of the questions would also be directed at him. Knockout stood by, optics pinned on Starscream, whose screams has ceased, now just raspy intakes as the Energon did its best to rid him of the Dark Energon. 

“First off,” the medic huffed, “I thought you were dead , Optimus! I saw you throw yourself into the well and not come back out! How, and why didn’t you think to contact me?!”.

Despite the anger, Optimus knew his companion was hurt. Hurt that Optimus had not thought to tell him, to reach out. He tried to answer, but the medic cut him off again, his servos clenching into tight fists.

“Fifteen stellar cycles!” he snapped, “fifteen stellar cycles I mourned your death! And you just stroll in here, with Starscream of all mechs clinging to you and screaming like a scraplet!”.

“I understand your hurt, old friend,” Optimus said, “however, the Primes did not grant me much time to talk to anyone, and I was forced to focus on improving my skills to destroy a powerful evil. I did not want to leave you in the dark about my survival… and I am truly sorry that I did. Your upset and anger towards me are justified, and you may take it out on me as you wish.”.

Ratchet looked like he wanted to say something, yell at the Prime, scream and rage against him. But the words faltered, and instead, he let his helm fall on Optimus’ chassis, a small weak sob coming from his mouth. He weakly pounded his servo on his chassis, though not pulling away when Optimus’ servos embraced him gently. Nor did he deny the lip plates that pressed a gentle kiss to the top of his helm. 

“I hate you,” he cried, the words holding no weight.

Optimus only smiled softly, still embracing his companion. He held Ratchet in his embrace for a good period of time, before the sniffling medic pulled away, drying the last of the lubricant off his faceplates. Then he gave Optimus a soft glare, jabbing a digit at the Prime.

“Do not ever pull a stunt like this again,” he snapped, “or not even the Primes will save you this time.”.

Optimus simply nodded, the soft smile still on his faceplates. 

“Understood, old friend.”.

Ratchet sighed, rolling his shoulders slightly. Then he turned to Bumblebee.

“Now, will you explain why Starscream,” he started asking, “who was also thought to be dead, is in his old chassis, almost dying from Dark Energon, and with the two of you?”.

Bumblebee let out a long sigh.

“Well, Ratchet,” he started, “you might want to sit down for this.”.

… 

The seeker soon realized the searing pain had stopped. It had been replaced with a throbbing, dull ache, but nowhere near as agonizing as before. He thought he was on fire, now it was just a fizzling heat. His systems weren’t fully functioning, however, as he soon came to realize. His optics weren’t online, it was a struggle to try and open them. He could hear well enough though. What started as a muffled combination of voices accompanied by a harsh ringing, soon cleared out to become an active conversation.

“–and he, of all mechs, took a hit for Optimus ?” came a gruffer, older voice. Starscream knew it was familiar, he had heard it before. He just couldn’t quite pin it. 

“Yeah,” said another familiar voice, “trust me, I got quite the shock too. Though it was also because he got flung across the battlefield and started screaming. Primus it was horrible how he screamed… I thought he was going to die…”.

Die?  

“Well you're in bad luck,” a mech chuckled, “Starscream seems to be a death repellent. It’s almost as if that mech can’t die.”. 

He knew… all these voices. But whatever had happened to him was making it hard to think. He let out a groan, trying to move, but stopped instantly as pain shot through his limbs. He heard pedsteps coming towards him, and he tried to turn his helm to their direction but whimpered in pain.

“Op bob bop,” a mech said, “keep still. You’re in no condition to be moving around, Starscream. You’re lucky to be alive considering all the Dark Energon we had to expel from your chassis.”.

“Who…” he groaned, “w-where…?”.

“It’s Ratchet,” the medic said, “and you’re in an Autobot base. Don’t exert yourself, you need time to recover.”.

Starscream whined, his processor still not functioning properly. Everything was a massive blur, and he really didn’t feel good. He just lay down, slowly processing the words said to him. He was with Ratchet, the Autobot medic, and he was in an Autobot base. He was… on Earth with Bumblebee, under heavy probation and slowly becoming an Autobot himself. He needed to recover from Dark Energon… the battle. The one against Megatronus. When he saw the blast aimed at Optimus, he reacted almost immediately. He told himself it was just to be useful, nothing more. But… it wasn’t all the truth. He wasn’t someone Optimus cared for, and really, there had been no reason for Starscream to save him. But he did. Because there had been a moment of concern , of horror as the blast fired. He felt he needed to do something, or Optimus might die. He had saved Optimus and nearly died in the process. Which was what he had wanted to avoid for so long, and moments ago he had charged towards it. 

“H-how long?” he hissed out, pain behind every word.

“If you’re asking about your recovery time,” Ratchet said, “about three weeks, maybe more.”.

Starscream nearly jumped at that, whining as pain shot through him again. Bad move. Ratchet had to pull him back down and stop him from squirming so much. Three weeks? That was too long. No. No, if he wasted three or more weeks on a medical berth, he just knew how useless he would be to the Autobots. He couldn’t prove his worth, he would be cast aside and into a pod. He was useless while hurt. He couldn’t be useless, just couldn’t.

You have ceased to be of use to me, Starscream.

“N-no,” he whimpered, “I-i can’t… too long… I don’t want… to be useless… can’t be… useless…”. 

“Primus, Starscream,” the medic said, “we’re not going to toss you into a smelting pit for being wounded! You need to recover, not jump back into battle and get yourself terminated! You’re not being useless!”.

Despite the medic’s harsh words, there was a small concern. Did the seeker really think the Autobots would get rid of him for getting injured? For having to recover in three weeks? 

What in the name of Primus had the Decepticons been doing? He thought, shaking his helm.

“Starscream,” boomed a voice, one Starscream soon recognized as Optimus, “when you have recovered, and are in a better state, I must speak with you, for I am concerned about your current state.”.

“W-what?” the seeker choked, “t-there’s nothing wrong with me–”.

“Starscream, that is not a request,” Optimus said, sterner, “it is an order.”.

The room became deathly silent. 

“Yes… sir.”.

Chapter Text

His greatest success so far was being able to open his optics. However, it was not something he could savour. Not when his optics focused on a bot, a medic, who seemed to loom above him, given Starscream’s position lying on a berth. He recognized the mech instantly. The shiny red plating, the clean and polished silver protoform, and those deep red optics. He snapped to attention, a growl forming on his faceplates when the medic looked down at him. He was shocked, then delighted, and finally, nervous. A shaky smile formed on his face, and he gave a meek wave to the seeker.

“Knockout.”.

“Hey, Screamer,” he chuckled, anxiety flooding his voice, “long time no see, right?”.

Starscream almost punched him. Almost. His arms, however, would not work, and so they just stayed limp by his sides, completely useless. Instead, he snarled. Sure, part of him was happy to see the medic again. But the other part wanted to throttle the medic.

“Don’t call me that,” he snapped, “I despise that nickname.”.

Knockout chuckled again, optics avoiding the seeker’s intense glare. His servo went to the back of his neck, rubbing it awkwardly. His other servo found purchase on his hips, clawed digits tapping away at the metal.

“Yeah,” he said plainly, “you do hate it.”.

There was a brief, uncomfortable silence that hung in the air. Then Knockout coughed.

“You know, uh,” the medic started, “it was quite a surprise to see you again. Considering… you know…”.

“That I’m supposed to be dead?” the seeker snapped, “yes you’d think you’d never have to see me again, what a relief that must have been. Sorry I ruined it by staying alive.”.

An emotion flickered across the medic’s face, one that made the seeker regret his words for only a moment; hurt.

“Aha, yes, erm,” Knockout stuttered, dentae biting his bottom lip plate, “well… when I heard what happened when I saw the Predacons come back… I might have… regretted some of my actions towards you…”.

There was a glint of guilt in the medic’s optics, the servo on the back of his neck moving to the edge of the berth, clutching it. He turned back to face Starscream, seeing the seeker’s harsh expression soften slightly. 

“Look,” Knockout started again, “I… I’m not good with apologies. I suck at them, really badly. But I can just… say I’m sorry for betraying you. And for smashing the immobilizer over your head. We had trusted each other, and well…”. The medic chuckled, though it was sad and regretful.

Starscream chuckled as well, surprising the red medic. “I guess we both fragged it up, didn’t we?”.

Knockout only nodded sadly. “Yes, we did.”. 

“I was angry at you,” the seeker started to ramble, “I still am. But… I’m hurt. It hurt, and I know that I hurt you. I pushed you away, pushed you away from me because I’m so bad at feelings and bad at caring for others. I never have the right words, never know what to do, and in the end I screw everything up and push everyone away even though I just–”.

“Just want to hold them closer,” the medic muttered, looking back at the seeker.

The seeker gave him a sombre, regretful look. “Yeah.”.

The medic chuckled again. “You know, back when I was testing on that… thing in Breakdown’s chassis, you asked me if I felt anything when experimenting on my partner’s remains. I tried to brush it off, act like I didn’t care… but…”. This time, Knockout let out a small, muffled sob. “I felt so much pain. Breakdown was everything to me… and that thing took him from me, along with that wretched spider.”. 

Starscream’s gaze became more regretful, optics travelling to the edge of the berth.  

“I…” he started, having no clue how to answer, “I’m sorry for your loss, Knockout. He meant a great deal to you, didn’t he?”.

Knockout could only nod, optics travelling off to somewhere in the distance. “Primus, I miss him so much.”.

Starscream could only nod, trying with all his strength to move his arm. His digits twitched, and he bit his lip plates as he managed to move his servo, the black clawed digits managing to just lay over the medic’s grey servo. The medic’s attention went back to the seeker, looking down at the servo, then back at the seeker’s optics. He let out a wobbly sigh, his other servo going over Starscream’s.

“I missed you,” Knockout confessed, “missed when you would complain and babble about nonsense. When I would call you nicknames you hated and you would rant on. And I could just laugh.”.

Starscream nodded. “I missed you too, Knockout. I regret lashing out at you, regret pushing you away. It wasn’t your fault, I shouldn’t have hurt you.”.

Starscream didn’t say it aloud, but the medic knew what he was talking about. The seeker, much to his dismay, felt lubricant prick his optics. Knockout was silent, before his servos gently wrapped around Starscream’s one, holding it up to the medic’s face. He felt the medic’s faceplates touch his palm, and he gently stroked the medic’s face. He started to cry, cool lubricant streaking down his face. Primus, he was so sorry for pushing the medic away. 

“Am I interrupting something?”

The sound of a gruff voice made the two jump, red optics landing on the other medic present. Ratchet raised an optic ridge, a questioning frown on his faceplate. Knockout gently set the seeker’s servo down, coughing. Then he put on his trademark sly smile, though the seeker could see it twitch just slightly.

“No, not at all,” the red medic lied, “just checking the patient’s condition, Doc.”.

The older medic grumbled, trudging over to the pair. He pointed a digit at Knockout, waving it accusingly.

“For the last time,” he huffed, “don’t call me ‘Doc’.”.

Then he checked over Starscream, making sure all his vitals and systems were stable. Then he turned back to the two of them.

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Ratchet warned, “or I swear to Primus I will dissect the pair of you!”.

The medic gave one more weary glance at Starscream, distrust written all over his faceplates. “Make sure the patient behaves himself.”. Then he walked away. Knockout let out another chuckle, turning back to Starscream.

“Oh don’t worry,” he said slyly, “I will.”.

Starscream only rolled his optics. 

“I see you have a new badge.”.

Knockout’s optics followed the seeker’s gaze to his chest, where a bright red Autobot insignia was located. The medic let out another chuckle, patting the insignia.

“Indeedy,” he said, “and I must say, it’s much better than the purple one I had before. It completely clashed with my paint job. The red is much more stylish, wouldn’t you agree?”.

Starscream let out a chuckle, a genuine happy chuckle. He was glad to see the medic had not changed much.

“Yes,” the seeker agreed, “it does suit you more.”.

He missed this.

Chapter Text

The seeker’s days in recovery were not as bad as he thought they would have been. Every once in a while, the red medic would come around, and the two would strike up a conversation while the medic checked him over. Piece by piece, the two were working on how to fix their relationship. Whenever they needed space, they would give it to each other. And slowly, fragment by tiny fragment, they were getting better. 

“And you cannot believe my luck,” the medic started to ramble, “one day, just driving by, minding my own business, this other very flashy red car crashes right into me! Right into my fresh paint job! I get pushed back, have to transform, and get scratches all over me! Completely ruining all that work! Can you believe it?”

Starscream shook his head, letting the medic continue. 

“It was outrageous!” he exclaimed, “well back to the story. I get on my pedes, see the damage, and I am not happy. I go back to the mech, who’s transformed back now, and I give him a piece of my mind. I almost felt bad as I chewed that kid out in the middle of the street, but in all honesty, he deserved it! Not only did he ruin my dashing looks, but he was also being a danger to everyone around him!”. The medic let out an exasperated sigh, almost making the seeker chuckle at the mech’s dramatics. “Who knew I’d end up mentoring that bot.”. 

Starscream let out a genuine chuckle. “You mentored a bot?”.

Knockout gave the seeker a look, before smirking. “You’d be surprised, Starscream.”.

Starscream only rolled his eyes playfully, his digit tapping the medic’s as if urging him to tell. “Then, by all means, Doctor” he purred, “tell me all about it.”. 

Knockout needed no more prompting. He burst into the story. “Alright so this bot and I had a few more run-ins after that disaster, and I saw that he was a troublesome one. Always racing, getting in trouble with the Cybertron Police, overall a public nuisance. So to prove my Autobot valour,” he posed dramatically, making the seeker chuckle, “I decided to take the rebellious little mech under my doorwing so to speak. I got him out of trouble most of the time. Oh, the shanix I spent bailing that little twerp out of jail.”.

Starscream chuckled, joyfully amused by the medic’s dramatics. “So, who’s the lucky mech to be stuck with you?”.

Knockout tapped a digit to his chin as if remembering. “His name is Sideswipe. I believe Bee told me he’s on your team.”.

Starscream’s optics widened in surprise. Sideswipe? So Knockout was the mentor the red bot had told him about?

“Sideswipe?” Starscream repeated as if he couldn’t believe it, “well… know that I think of it, you two do have some similarities.”.

“Oh?” Knockout asked, cocking an optic ridge.

Starscream smirked. “You both love to call me Screamer, no matter how much I hate it.”.

At that Knockout let out a laugh, patting Starscream’s shoulder as he giggled. The seeker only let out a snort, happy to just be in the presence of the red mech again. 

The two continued to babble on, catching up on what they had done for the past fifteen stellar cycles since they last saw each other. Apparently, Knockout had stayed on Cybertron for a couple of stellar cycles, trying to keep up with his career as a medic, though struggling because of the many regulations and rules in place after the war. When Ratchet said he was returning to Hangar E on Earth, he offered the medic to join. Knockout had not been too hesitant, rather interested in returning to Earth. There were many things about the planet he enjoyed, such as racing and human films. Meanwhile, Starscream told him a bit about what he did.

“After I survived my encounter,” the seeker started, “which I did so very bravely, I took a ship docked below Darkmount and left Cybertron. I may or may not have wandered around in space for all these stellar cycles in a revenge quest against Megatron, but well… I may have gotten tired of searching, and tired of a lot of things. I changed a lot in space. Well, being alone with your own company for fifteen stellar cycles furious for revenge will do that to you. But well… I ended up back here, funnily enough. And then to my luck, I started running low on energon.”.

Knockout listened intently. “So you got stuck here.”.

“Precisely,” the seeker sighed, “and then to further my luck, a human and a minicon decided to play hide and seek aboard my ship.”.

Knockout stifled a snort. Starscream smiled.

“Well I chased them down the hall,” he started again, “but after I learnt Bumblebee was on Earth, I so mercifully let them go back, not wanting to start trouble with the Autobots again. And well, then I had the ridiculous thought of joining the lot of you.”.

Knockout rolled his optics, playfully nudging the seeker. “And yet here you are, in my medbay.”.

Starscream scoffed, nudging the medic back. “Ratchet’s medbay. If that cranky old bot heard you claiming his medbay, who knows what he might do with you.”.

Knockout laughed again, shaking his head. “Well continue your story, Great and Merciful Starscream.”.

Starscream stuck out his glossa, before continuing his story. He talked about Bumblebee sneaking aboard his ship, but changed the part about him speeding away in a hurry, and then went to the next part.

“And then, in great valiance,” the seeker began, “I offered my aid. The Autobots were so thankful they accepted, and I flew over the barrier and dove into a fierce battle with the criminals. I took down the leader, close to victory. However, he went after Bumblebee next, and I jumped in to save him, like the amazingly humble mech I am.”.

Knockout rolled his eyes. “What happened then, oh so Humble Starscream?”.

Starscream grinned, and dramatically places his servo on his helm, tipping it backwards just an inch. “Then, I was struck! Oh it was horrid! Energon gushing out everywhere, why I was sure I was a goner!”. The medic chuckled, the seeker’s eyes lighting up at seeing the medic enjoy his story, despite all the dramatics. “But I was graciously saved and healed by Bumblebee, who later allowed me to join his team under probation.”. Then the seeker raised his arms, and gently laid back on the berth. “And now here I am, after my attempt to sacrifice myself for Optimus Prime.”.

Knockout let out another giggle, flicking the seeker on the helm, though his optics were full of glee. “Oh, how noble you are. Why you should be a Prime yourself.”.

Starscream giggled, glad that Knockout played along with him. Soon, the two were giggling, euphoric smiles spread across their faces. They soon calmed down, giggles dying down, the two sighing contently. Starscream knew Knockout had to go soon, he had his own tasks to do. The medic did one final check through the seeker’s condition and vitals, making sure all was good, before patting Starscream on the shoulder and walking through the base, leaving the seeker to himself. The seeker smiled, resting his helm, red optics closing. 

He was happier than he had been for a good while.

Chapter Text

He awoke to the feeling of something small and warm crawling onto his cockpit. He didn’t online his eyes immediately, instead of listening out for whatever thing was on him. He instead heard voices, some worried, one excited.

“Come on guys!” piped the first voice, of which sounded like a female, “it’s not like he can hurt us! Besides, look how much bigger and bulky he looks! So much cooler than when he looked like Slenderman!”.

Slenderman? He thought, is that a human insult?

“Miko, get down from there!” a male voice scolded, “we’re not teenagers anymore! You know if he wakes up, he is not going to be happy!”.

“Awww, you’re such a party pooper, Jack!” Miko complained, “besides, Ratchet and Knockout said he’s no longer a nasty ‘con, so he can’t squish us!”.

Oh. Oh, now he remembered . These were Team Prime’s humans. The annoying pigtail girl, the smallest one with glasses, and the one with black hair. Or, by their names, Miko, Jack, and… was it Robby? He couldn’t remember.

“Still Miko,” another voice piped up, who he assumed was the human with glasses, though his voice was deeper, “Starscream isn’t known to be fond of humans. He probably won’t be too happy to wake up and see you crawling on his chest.”.

Miko was about to retort, a snappy and immature response on the tip of her tongue. 

“No, I wouldn’t be.”.

The sound of the familiar voice, dripping with irritation, froze all three humans. Miko turned slightly, jumping back slightly when she saw two red optics illuminating the darkness. The other two humans were on a landing, eyes wide with shock and staring at the seeker. Miko let out a meek and nervous chuckle.

“Uh, hello Scream,” she chuckled, “long time no see?”.

Starscream scowled. “Off. Now.”.

Miko wanted to groan, but she slowly got off his chassis, jumping down onto the berth, before scuttling down, running back up some stairs to join her friends on the landing. Starscream merely glared at them, optics adjusting to the darkness. He recognized the three humans now, although their appearance was different.

“You look much more different than I last saw you,” he stated, staring at them to make out the differences. 

“We could say the same about you,” Jack answered, though the seeker could tell he was on edge. Not that he could be blamed, any encounter he had previously had with Starscream usually resulted in the seeker trying to kill him or the Autobots. Starscream could see the changes in the boy, though he looked more like an adult now. Stubble lined his chin, his black hair short and messy. His face was less round, and he had faint bags under his eyes. He was wearing a black t-shirt, with a checkered white and grey shirt over it. He also wore brown trousers and shoes, and a belt looped around his trousers. 

“Alright Scream, talk,” Miko said, leaning on the railing as she stared at the seeker, “why are you so bulky all of a sudden? You used to be smaller and like a stick bug. You were also grey and dull, but now you look like a rainbow.”.

She was also different. Although her hair still had pink streaks amongst the black choppy hair, it was cut shorter, no longer having pigtails or whatever strange hairstyle it was. She was taller, wearing a leather jacket and black shirt with a cherry red skull printed on it, as well as a red and black gingham plaid skirt that reached just over her knees. She also wore heeled combat boots and wore a few necklaces around her neck. Though her personality was almost exactly the same as it had been fifteen stellar cycles ago.

Starscream scoffed. “I changed body styles, as did the rest of you it seems.”.

“That’s just called growing,” the third human said, “well for us. Not you.”.

He looked fairly the same as before, though he was taller and older. His light brown hair was still slicked back messily, those red glasses still on his face. His clothes were nearly the same as well, wearing a white shirt with a tie and an orange vest. But he also wore brown trousers, red sneakers, and what appeared to be a lab coat.

“Ah,” Starscream said, “so like an upgrade I’m guessing. Well, what do you want from me?”.

The seeker stared at them, unamused with the humans. It appeared the Autobots still couldn’t keep track of them. “Because if it’s nothing, I’ll just go back to recharging.”. 

“We want you to spill the beans, Screamer,” Miko exclaimed, pointing a finger at him, “why are you not being all evil and well, Starscreamy?”.

He frowned. “Starscreamy?”.  

“Just answer the question!”

He rolled his optics, twisting his helm away from them. “You can just get that answer from Ratchet or Knockout. Let me recharge in peace.”. 

He was, unfortunately, aware they would most likely not leave him alone until he spoke, but he wasn’t in the mood. He could talk to Knockout, but that was Knockout. They had a bond they were trying to repair. Ratchet already knew so there wasn’t anything there. But these humans could go ask somewhere else. He didn’t want to talk to them, not now anyway. He was still exhausted, recovery was hard.

“Come on Miko,” the youngest of the three said, “let’s just leave. We can just ask Ratchet.”.

The boy didn’t want to be around the seeker any more than was necessary. He was still extremely cautious, despite what was apparently true about the seeker trying to be an Autobot. What he did in the past was something that lingered, and would most likely not go away. Not anytime soon.

After a defeated whine from Miko, the trio of humans slowly walked away, their footsteps making small noises against the metal landing and stairs, and Starscream let out a tired sigh. He shut his optics, letting himself relax. That was much better. 

… 

“Ugh, that was a waste!” Miko complained, flopping down onto a couch, “Come on, Raf! We could have made him spill his slimy guts!”

“Or he could have spilt your guts,” Jack retorted, “Miko, despite what the bots say, Starscream is… well, Starscream! He could have killed you when he woke up! That was stupid, and in all honesty, we should just ask Ratchet or Knockout for the story, to avoid getting skewered.”.

The woman rolled her eyes, crossing her arms in frustration. “Fine, we’ll just ask the Doc-Bots.”. 

Raf sighed, sitting on the same couch. “I just don’t want to be around Starscream for as much as I can. I don’t trust that he’s suddenly flipping on a coin like that, I mean, he is known to be a backstabber.”. 

Jack sat with them. “Look, I don’t really care, I just don’t want him to try anything. The quicker we let him recover, the quicker he leaves. Then we can go back to pretending he never was here. Easier for us, easier for him. And that doesn’t give him a reason to become hostile, Miko .”.

Jack’s only response was an angry glare and a raspberry. 

“We’ll ask the Bots when they come back, alright?”.

Miko, tired of the conversation, just sank deeper into the couch. “Yeah, whatever.”.

Jack sighed, just leaning back on the couch. Raf turned on the television, which was playing some old film. Miko took out her phone, playing a game. Though thoughts ran rampant in all their minds, despite their distractions.

Chapter Text

“Ratchet.”.

Tap tap tap

“Ratchet.”.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

“Ratcheeeeet!”

“WHAT?!” the medic finally snapped, turning grumpily to Miko, who had been tapping away at his pede for a while now. The girl jumped back slightly at his reaction, before scoffing.

“Jeez, chill.”.

Ratchet sighed. “Miko, you can just tell me what your question is, not distract me from what I’m doing.”.

“I wanna know about Screamer,” she exclaimed, “I mean you told us he died! But ka-poof! He’s in our base! And he looks different! You never told us that bots could change bodies!”.

Ratchet let out an exasperated sigh. “Look, I just know the basic overview of it all. If you want the details, you’ll have to ask Bumblebee, if he comes by again. But what I can say is Starscream has shown… change from what he once was. He has been working to prove himself ‘worthy’ of being an Autobot. Sometimes, to a fault. One is what got him here in the first place.”.

“Oooh what was it?” Miko asked, excitement present in her voice.

“Apparently, and trust me I find it hard to believe,” he started, “during a battle for the sake of our planet and yours, he was willing to sacrifice himself for Optimus. And if he had not been rushed here and operated on as soon as possible, he would have died from a direct shot of Dark Energon right into his chassis. That’s why he needs so long to recover, the Dark Energon wreaked havoc on his body, and he’s lucky to be alive.”.

“Woah, Woah Woah,” Jack said, popping up behind Miko, eyes wide in shock, “you’re telling us Starscream sacrificed himself? For Optimus ? That’s–” 

“Not like him at all?” Ratchet responded, “trust me, I had the same reaction when Bumblebee told me.”.

The base became silent after that. The three humans had to truly let that information set in. It felt strange to hear that the seeker, once a danger and an enemy, had done such an act. That he had truly sacrificed himself for Optimus of all mechs. It sounded like a fantasy, it sounded like a lie. And yet it was a truth. It would take them a while to come to terms with what they were hearing.

All the while, Starscream was still recovering. It had been about a week since the battle, and recovery was slower than he would have liked. He wanted to move, to do something other than lie on this berth. It made him feel useless. And well, it was pretty clear now how he felt about that feeling. Every day he tried to convince Ratchet to let him start walking, to start trying to move again. 

“I’ll end up with stiff joints,” the seeker whined, “at this rate, I’ll forget how to walk!”.

“Quit complaining,” Ratchet scoffed, “it’s been a week. You’ll be fine. When it’s safe for you to start physical therapy, I will tell you. Until then, what you need is rest and time for your body to recover. It was–”

“A miracle that I survived the blast,” Starscream replied, “please you’ve said that enough times that I could recite it in my sleep.”.

“In that case,” Ratchet retorted, “you know what my answer is. So shush, and sleep.”.

The seeker groaned in defeat, rolling his optics before shutting them. He heard a chuckle and peeped one optic open. Knockout was giggling as he worked on something, giving Starscream a cheeky glance. The seeker only pouted, twisting his helm slightly to the other side. He shut his optics again, letting out an indignant hmph .

… 

There was the sound of a ground bridge opening up, the noise waking up the seeker. He groggily opened his optics, hearing pedsteps coming in his direction. He grunted, doing his best to push himself up onto his elbows. 

“Op-Bob-Bop!” Ratchet scolded, coming to steady the seeker, “don’t strain yourself, Starscream.”.

The seeker just rolled his optics, lying back down. His optics landed on the new arrival, of which he immediately recognized as his lieutenant. This was the first time he had seen him since the battle, about a week ago.

“He’s not giving you any trouble, right Ratchet?” Bumblebee asked, although there was a lightheartedness to his tone.

Ratchet simply shook his head. “Apart from whining like a human child and rolling his eyes so hard that they’ll soon sink into his sockets,” he started, a small smile forming on his lips as the seeker gaped in outrage, “he’s been just fine. But the sooner you can take him back, the better for my audial receptors,” he looked back to Knockout, “how did you deal with him?”.

Starscream looked to the medic, hoping for some sort of defence. Knockout only smirked. “Trust me, I didn’t. He was worse than he is now.”.

The three Autobots stifled a giggle, while the seeker’s face contorted into childish indignation. “Oh come on! You’re supposed to be on my side!”. Knockout only laughed in response, the other two Autobots bursting out laughing along with him. The seeker only grumbled, a pout on his face. The laughter soon died down, and Bumblebee straightened himself out.

“I just came to check on you,” he said, turning to the seeker, “make sure you’re doing okay. Are you?”.

The seeker huffed but then sighed. “Yes, I’m fine. Just wanting to do something other than slowly rusting on this berth.”.

Bumblebee smiled lightly. “It’s okay Starscream. You need time to recover, you were hurt pretty bad. You scared me in all honesty. I was really worried about you.”.

“Yes yes I kno–” the seeker paused, turning to his lieutenant with a shocked expression, “wait– you were worried? About… me?”.

Bumblebee nodded. “Very. I didn’t know if you were going to survive, and that thought scared me. I was really surprised when you did that for Optimus, and in all honesty, I owe you thanks. That was brave of you, really noble of you.”.

Oh wow. That had been genuine praise, genuine… concern for his safety. For him. He was in shock, staring at Bumblebee with wide optics. He felt a servo place above his shoulder and looked momentarily at Knockout, who gave him a small thumbs up. Starscream put on a genuine smile. “Thank you, lieutenant.”.

Bumblebee smiled back. “No, thank you, Starscream.”.

The seeker felt that things were going to get better. A lot better.

Chapter Text

After a week, the minicons had finally woken up. They had been unconscious since their split from the fake Megatronus, only now getting around. The power it must have taken them to not only combine with the mech but give him such power for Primus knows how long, must have drained them to their core. When they had awoken, they all felt much confusion at their surroundings and were untrustworthy of the Autobots. That was, until, one of them recognized Optimus. That minicon, who resembled an earth eagle, did his best to reassure the other minicons that they were not in danger. Tension soon de-escalated, and the minicons lowered their guard slightly. They had soon come to know the names of these minicons as well.

The one resembling an eagle was called Aerobolt. One resembling a triceratops was named Tricerashot. There was a fish-like minicon, named Sawtooth. The one with teal plating was Bashbreaker, while the one with red plating was Buzzstrike. There was Windstrike, a minicon with blue plaiting, and finally, Lancelon, a minicon with gold plating. 

When asked for their origins, Aerobolt was the one who answered.

“We were captured in our youth,” he started to explain, “taken by Decepticons and given to the scientist Shockwave. In his custody, we were experimented on. For what purpose, we did not know. We were genetically modified to be able to connect to either Autobots or Decepticons and take over their motor functions. We could also provide our host with a power boost.”.

“Did Shockwave tell you the nature of his experiments?”

Aerobolt shook his head. “No, we, unfortunately, found that on our own when his project expanded.”.

“Expanded how?”.

“Shockwave had a theory that if the seven of us combined with one host, that the host could surge in power to that of a Prime, or even more powerful.”.

There was a brief silence, in which Aerobolt continued, the story laced with the trauma of both him and his fellow minicons.

“Shockwave created a mech and forced us to merge with him. He did indeed, become more powerful than a Prime. But, for some reason, he went completely rogue. And as such, Shockwave had no choice but to send Megatronus somewhere he could not cause damage. We believe Shockwave sent us all to unspace. There, we resided for several thousand years, until the mech broke free from unspace and battled you. Then, thanks to Optimus Prime, we were freed from the forced combination.”. 

It seemed to add up to the few details Starscream had told them during the battle, and Optimus Prime nodded. “Thank you for your explanation, Aerobolt. We are truly sorry for what you and your comrades have suffered.”.

Aerobolt had trouble knowing how to react and simply settled on a nod. “Thank you, Optimus Prime. As well as for freeing us. But now, we do not know where to go or what to do.”. 

Optimus only nodded. “I understand. If it brings you any comfort, you may stay with us on Earth for as long as you may need.”.

Aerobolt was silent for a brief moment, before sighing. “I… I must discuss this with the others.”.

Optimus nodded yet again. “Understood, Aerobolt.”. 

With that, they left the minicons to discuss. 

… 

“You really trust these bots, Aerobolt?” Tricerashot whispered, glaring cautiously at the Autobots standing nearby, “they could be lying.”.

“I know why you are sceptical of the Autobots, Tricerashot,” Aerobolt answered, “we have not seen a kind faceplate in thousands of years. But from all I have heard of Optimus Prime, he is nothing like the Decepticons. Besides, at this current moment, we do not have many options on where to go or what to do.”.

The other minicons looked at Aerobolt, worry and fear in their optics. They did not trust the Autobots, not one bit. It was hard to trust anyone when you were snatched at such a young age and experimented on like scraplets. But they had to weigh their options. Currently, they had nowhere else. They had no true home to go to. And they did not want to risk their freedom by going at it alone. The Autobots had previously stated that there were Decepticon criminals roaming this planet, and the minicons did not want to have to relive the horrid experience of being forced to merge with anyone. 

With uncertain nods, the minicons came to a decision. Aerobolt turned back to Optimus Prime, and with a sigh, stated their choice.

“We will stay with you. For now.”.

Chapter Text

Knockout heard muttering. Curious and concerned, he twisted his helm around to search for the source of the sounds. His red optics landed on Starscream, who was twitching and flinching in his sleep. Knockout’s concern grew when he heard just what Starscream was muttering.

“N-no, no please” he whimpered, “M-master please…”. 

It clicked in place for Knockout. Gently, his clawed servo lay upon the seeker’s shoulder, shaking him carefully. The seeker continued to whimper, a faint tremble felt running across his chassis. He knew he should not disturb the seeker’s sleep, but if he was having a nightmare, rest would do him no good. It would be cruel to let him be stuck in this nightmare for much longer. Knockout shook him slightly stronger.

“Starscream,” he gently whispered, “wake up.”.

The seeker’s eyes shot wide open, and his claw dashed for the medic’s, holding it in a tight grip. Knockout jumped back, about to swipe his servo back. That was until he saw the seeker’s panicked eyes. He slowly let himself relax, and instead used his other servo to gently caress the seeker’s trembling one. He stayed silent, listening to the seeker’s agitated intakes as he struggled to calm down, the nightmare still having an effect on him. Knockout stood by, providing the seeker with comfort as best he could. 

“You’re safe,” the medic reassured truthfully, “you’re safe here, Starscream.”.

The seeker’s trembling began to die down, slowly, but his fright was melting away. He sighed, laying back down, though the tension was still slightly there. He looked at the medic, bright red optics full of shame and embarrassment. He coughed lightly.

“Sorry about that,” Starscream muttered, “it was just a silly little dream.”.

“Starscream,” the medic sighed, “your dreams are far from stupid. I know that they scare you, and badly at that.”.

The seeker’s eyes trailed downwards, a feeble excuse trying to form on his lips but to no avail. Finally, he gives up, curling up slightly, a light fear returning to his optics. He squeezes the medic’s servo and speaks.

“You know,” Knockout started, “I find that sharing dreams can sometimes help them go away.”.

Starscream raised an optic ridge. It sounded silly, but honestly, who knows? He was sick of the nightmares, and it would be nice to tell someone about it. And so he did.

“It’s Megatron,” he finally confessed, “in my dreams, I start in the dark. Then I walk and see light. I go to it, and find myself in a cave. And then…” the seeker took a shaky breath, the terror returning to his eyes, “I hear his pedsteps. They’re so loud, so vivid and I know them so well. And then he comes out of the cave, scowling and angry… he says my name, and he’s not happy… I’ve done something wrong, something to make him so angry, and I know I’m going to get punished… and it doesn’t matter what I do. I run, I cower, I beg, but the end is always the same,” he holds back a whimper, “he tells me I’ve ceased to be of use to him… so I shall simply cease to be. I beg and I cry and I scream… and then he tells me I was always worthless and his canon blasts me… and… and then I wake up.”.

The seeker felt lubricant run down his faceplates and whimpered. “I hate those nightmares.”. 

Knockout said nothing at first, guilt and pity in his optics. Though he never expressed it aloud. Starscream hated pity towards him. Instead, he gently brushed the seeker’s lubricant out of his faceplates and got down to eye level with the seeker. His optics were soft and understanding, simply comforting the seeker.

“Oh, Starscream” he whispered, “I’m so sorry…”.

Starscream let himself cry. All the pent up fear and terror was allowed to be released, he did not try to stop the flow of lubricant down his cheeks, and he buried his helm into Knockout’s chest plates, holding onto his servo for dear life. And Knockout let him, wrapping his servos gently around the seeker as he cried, gently rubbing circles into his wings. He felt his own lubricant run down his cheeks, sighing as he held the seeker, his seeker, in a loving embrace.

Time passed by as the two held each other, and before long, Starscream had stopped crying. His intakes were calmer, lubricant had stopped falling down his faceplates, and he gently tapped Knockout’s back, pulling away gently from his embrace. He put on a sad but warm smile and lied back down. Knockout smiled back and looked at the seeker.

“Would you…” the seeker started, “would you mind recharging with me for a while? It could help with the, you know, nightmares.”.

Knockout let out a soft giggle. “Well it isn’t very ethical, but for you, I’ll allow it.”.

The medic gently crawled onto the medical berth, letting the seeker have more space, before laying an arm over Starscream’s shoulder and pressing his faceplates against his cockpit. It didn’t take long for the pair to fall asleep, and this time, no nightmares and no Megatron followed Starscream into recharge.

Chapter Text

Another week had passed since his slow recovery, and finally, after much whining and begging, Ratchet allowed him to start physical therapy. It started very slow, and rather painfully. 

Until now, Starscream had no idea how difficult walking actually was. Even the smallest of movements from his legs sent waves of pain through his chassis. He would never admit the fact that he needed to be held up by Knockout to prevent him from simply crashing to the ground. 

On the first day, he barely managed to bend his knees, grunting and growling as he urged his legs to bend. It didn’t get any easier, as every day afterwards, the treatment would slowly, little by little, get more and more difficult. He struggled to keep his balance, struggled to put one step in front of the other, struggled to even get the joints to work and bend.

Safe to say it was a nightmare. Ratchet assured him progress was progress, but it didn’t feel all that good to Starscream. He felt pathetic, weak, and like he was too slow in his recovery. It was humiliating to him, to have to be so weak in front of others. But then there was Knockout. Always assuring, always helping, always doing his best to make Starscream know that it was okay, that he was doing great. And honestly, despite how hard it was to believe, the medic's words helped. 

And soon, after another week, he began to make significant improvements, even being able to stand and walk small steps on his own. And Starscream actually began to feel proud, he took pride in his recovery, and the effort he put into it. He was getting better, and that's what mattered to him now. There was still whispers, those whispers in his mind that told him otherwise, but he listened to them less and less. 

Things were beginning to look up, and Starscream was getting tired of living in the dark. 

Chapter Text

It had been about two months since the battle against the fake Megatronus had taken place. During that time, Starscream had managed to heal considerably, able to walk, to run, even if sometimes it was painful, or sometimes he just couldn’t do it. He was doing better, and not just physically. His nightmares were beginning to fade, ever so slowly. And Knockout, wonderful beautiful Knockout, always there to make sure he was well. Soon, Ratchet deemed him functional enough to return to action. 

“Now remember,” Ratchet began, pressing in the coordinates of the scrapyard into the ground bridge, “you may have made significant progress in your physical therapy, but you are still healing. Don’t strain yourself, Starscream, take it easy and prioritise your safety. And don’t get yourself badly hurt, or I swear to Primus I will confine you to a medical berth for the rest of your life!”

The seeker chuckled but nodded at the medic. “I’ll do my best, doctor.”.

“I mean it Starscream,” the medic said, powering up the ground bridge, and pointing an accusing digit at the seeker, “no ridiculous stunts.”.

“Fine, fine,” the seeker relented, raising his servos to indicate surrender, and grinned as the telltale green swirl of the ground bridge illuminated the room, smiling with joy at the thought of returning to his team. Everything would go just fine.

…

Immediately everything went horribly wrong. The second he’d stepped through the ground bridge portal, he was met with the smell of something burning, a charred ground bridge, half his team missing, and the other half sprawled across the scrapyard groaning in pain and attempting to get up. He stood in shock for a second, trying to wrap his processor around what he was seeing before his name being called out brought him to his attention.

“What in the Allspark happened here?” he asked, the words slipping out involuntarily.

“Starscream,” Bumblebee groaned out, “you… what are you doing here? Aren’t you meant to be healing?”

“I was cleared,” he mumbled, shaking out of it, “my question is what happened while I was gone?”

“We were attacked, obviously,” Strongarm stated, rubbing her helm to alleviate the throbbing pain there, her frame scuffed and dented, “some ‘Con came out of nowhere, looking for Optimus, and beat us up,” she turned to Bumblebee, who was slowly recovering from being knocked to the ground, “And Lieutenant, I hate to say it, but Overload seemed to have the armour to stand up to our entire team”.

Starscream slumped at the name. “Overload? He’s here?” he groaned in disbelief, “great.”.

Strongarm raised a brow. “You know him?”

“Well of course I know him,” he replied, “sure espionage was more Soundwave’s whole thing, but I was high ranked enough that I was privy to who were our spies during the war. For whatever reason, Overload seemed to be our best, despite his insufferable gloating and prancing.”.

“Really?” Strongarm scoffed, “he sounds a lot like you.”.

Starscream gaped. “I- no he- why-” he stumbled with his words, “I am not like Overload at all!”

Strongarm rolled her eyes, not arguing further, and Starscream just swallowed his outrage to focus on what was now most likely another mission. 

“He didn’t seem to have as much armour around his face,” Russel noted.

“Overload was vain about his appearance,” Starscream stated, “thought he was ruggedly good-looking or something, never wanted to hide his face. He always said as much.”.

Strongarm turned to Bumblebee, frowning. “Maybe if we had Sideswipe, Drift and—”

“Maybe doesn’t matter,” Bumblebee cut her off, his expression becoming bitter and spiteful, something Starscream wasn’t used to seeing, “I’m taking that Decepticon down.”.

Something about those words… how they were said… brought a sickly sense of deja vu over Starscream. He knew that feeling, the one Bumblebee wasn’t concealing well. The hate, the spite, the rage. The thirst for revenge. He had a good idea why. He’d heard about what had happened when Overload had been captured by the Autobots during a particular battle when his supposed spycraft had been found. About how Optimus’ scout had been beaten within an inch of his life. It was no surprise to him why Bumblebee would be particularly angry towards this Decepticon, heck he probably would have felt the same if it had been Megatron who descended from the sky to beat his aft and then skip away. But he knew all too well the trap that was letting oneself get consumed by the want for revenge. It was why he was even here in the first place. Revenge, the thirst for it had driven him to become a shell. The last thing he wanted was for the one who saved him from it to end up like that. 

“With our help, right?” Grimlock asked, staring with a small amount of concern at his leader.

“Before he hurts anyone else,” Bumblebee added unhelpfully, already turning on his pedes.

Starscream frowned. He knew all too well what this looked like. 

“Fixit, continue ground bridge repairs while I go after Overload.”.

Starscream shuffled over to Strongarm. “Speaking of the ground bridge,” he muttered, “what happened here?”.

She turned to look at him and sighed. “The ground bridge blew up,” she muttered back, “see, we split the team up, and sent Optimus, Drift, Windblade and Sideswipe on an ‘away team’ to hunt down Decepticons worldwide. Unfortunately, because Optimus had to give back his shared power with the Primes, he’s gotten really badly wounded, and something in his system made the ground bridge fritz. Oh, and we have minicons on our team now. Well, technically. They’re kind of just laying low in the scrapyard till they figure out what to do.”.

That was… a lot of information Starscream didn’t have time to process right now. Brilliant. 

“We have another concern,” Fixit muttered in concern, “the two minicons we captured got loose!”

Well this day was going just great, wasn’t it?

“Stopping Overload is my priority,” Bumblebee said, “we’ll add the minicons to our to-do list.”.

Starscream’s frown only deepened. This behaviour from Bumblebee was unlike him. Yes, Bumblebee had gotten mad in the past, he knew from experience. But this vengeful look he had, was something less seen in someone like Bumblebee and more something he’d see from… himself. Well, his old self, of course. He thinks…

“Lieutenant, we’re coming too right?” Strongarm added, most likely picking up on the same thing he had. Perhaps not to the same extent, but somewhat.

“Oh, uh, of course,” Bumblebee added as if he’d momentarily forgotten he had a team. 

“And maybe we should take Starscream with us on this mission,” Strongarm added, much to Starscream’s surprise, “after all if he also has experience with Overload, he could be helpful to this mission.

Bumblebee stared at him, considering. Starscream voiced nothing, not wanting to possibly shatter any progress he might have done.

“Alright, that’s a good idea,” Bumblebee said, “Starscream, you can come on missions now. Now, come on team, let’s rev up and roll out!”

With that he transformed, already starting off. The rest of the team followed his lead, transforming and speeding off. Starscream took a second, before transforming and speeding off into the sky, following his team from above, but staying close. He had a bad feeling about how personally Bumblebee was taking this, and he knew that when emotion got involved in a battle, all sorts of things could go wrong. He knew it all too well.

Chapter Text

They managed to arrive at a small car park, riddled with torn up cars. It was clear a battle had taken place here, from the way the destruction was laid out. Starscream frowned, staring at the charred remains of a car. He wasn’t just upset about this whole mess that happened just as he’d come back, he was worried. Worried about the state his leader was currently in. From the way Bumblebee was acting, it was clear he wasn’t thinking with a clear mind. He’d jumped straight to assumptions, and was definitely trying to split the team up to take Overload by himself.

“Overload and the minicons probably went in different directions after the skirmish,” Bumblebee stated, “those trees look like Overload’s handiwork. I’ll head this way and look for him. Strongarm, Grimlock, you go the other way and try to locate those minicons. Starscream, stick to the skies and try to find the minicons from up there.”.

Starscream raised his brow. He wanted to speak up, really he did. But… there was still doubt. Added on with Bumblebee’s behaviour and temper, he didn’t feel inclined to share thoughts. Part of him knew Bumblebee would never hurt him, not hit him like Megatron… but after repeated incidents from his former master ripping him apart for mild suggestions, he wasn’t inclined to test waters. Luckily for him, Strongarm spoke up instead.

“Sir, don’t you think you should have some backup against Overload?” she asked, “I mean, after all, he kind of, well, gave you, and us, a rough time back at the scrapyard. And it sounded like a long time ago he might have—”

“No,” Bumblebee hissed, his voice cold and spiteful, “Overload is mine.”.

Then he transformed, speeding off. Starscream let a huff slip out.

Strongarm turned, raising a brow.

“What?” she asked

“He’s going to get himself terminated like that,” Starscream said. Seeing his leader act like that, driven by revenge and hate, it reminded him too much of himself, “take it from me, revenge just ends up leading one to the Pit. The Lieutenant has reason to be mad, a good one. But he’s letting himself get driven by emotion alone. And that isn’t going to help him or us. Acting the way he is will jeopardise our mission.”.

“Well we can’t just disobey his orders,” Strongarm said, “you aren’t suggesting we disobey him, are you?”.

“No, of course not,” Starscream said, “it would be wise to check for the minicons in that direction. And those are your orders, I’m not about to ask you to do otherwise. But I will. The Lieutenant is being reckless, and I know that look he has. The hate, the spite, the drive for revenge. I’m not about to let him fall down that path.”.

Not like I did.

Strongarm stared at him, surprised. She hadn’t expected this of the seeker. It was the same shock she felt when he’d thrown himself at the blast back during the battle against Megatronus. She was so sure, so so sure the Seeker was a trickster, a liar, a cheat, and a backstabber. Just like her mentor had told her. But… as she looked at the mech before her, she wasn’t so sure of herself anymore.

“If I get punished for it, well,” he steels himself, “not a problem. But I don’t want him to get himself hurt. At the same time, I won’t get either of you in trouble.”.

Part of him doesn’t want to do this. He should just follow orders, behave properly, and do what he’s told. But if Bumblebee got himself hurt by acting recklessly, that certainly wouldn’t help. And as much as he hated it… he was used to a beating, should it happen. At least it would be for the right reasons this time.

With that he transformed and flew up, following where Bumblebee had sped off to.

Grimlock stared with worry as he left. “You think he’ll be okay?”

Strongarm didn’t know.

…

Bumblebee was near to something, he was sure of it. He could hear something in the distance, and he’d followed the path of broken trees and ripped up dirt to know Overload was nearby. He was clouded by fresh raw anger, a spite and hate for the Decepticon that made him grit his denta and clench his weapon harder. Then… he heard the sound of a jet engine, and transforming. Suddenly, Starscream had dropped from the sky, landing next to him. Bumblebee swerved and pointed his weapon at the seeker as a reflex, and then stopped when he saw who it was. His shock melted into anger.

“Starscream?! What are you doing here?! I told you to-”

“With all respect, Lieutenant,” the seeker interrupted, standing. His optics were stern, his mouth pressed into a thin line, “I am concerned for your safety. I wasn’t present when you and Overload had your… fight. But I can tell it’s personal to you, and you’re rightfully upset. But I worry that your judgement is being clouded by your feelings. So I’m coming with you.”.

Bumblebee scowled, shaking his helm.

“No you aren’t!” he hissed, “you’re going back. Overload is mine, you got it? You have no idea what it’s like to—”

“To what?” Starscream interrupted him, his expression stern, “To feel wronged? To feel angry? To feel this deep hate, this spite, this fire that consumes your thoughts, when you see the one who hurt you unharmed, where you want them to know how badly they hurt you, you want to make them never forget it, to have them at your mercy while you rip them apart after everything they put you through? To want revenge so badly it blinds you?”

Bumblebee wanted to retort, but… he was just silent, as if just realising now what he was doing. Starscream continued, summoning his courage to put a servo on Bumblebee’s shoulder plate.

“Bumblebee… out of everyone, believe me, I know the feeling,” he said softly, “I understand you. You want revenge, and you deserve closure, you deserve to feel anger. But revenge doesn’t… it isn’t going to help. Please… take it from me. My thirst, my need for vengeance, it didn’t help. I was lost for a long time because all I wanted was revenge, and it left me hollow. Please, don’t… don’t make the same mistake I did. Please. Let me help you, just like you helped me.”.

Bumblebee was silent, his optics staring at the seeker infront of him. He saw the way he looked at him, with such deep sympathy, such deep understanding. He knew. Bumblebee found himself snapping out of the feeling of ever consuming rage. Starscream was right. He sighed deeply.

“You’re right, scrap,” Bumblebee sighed, “I’m sorry. I let my anger get the better of me.”.

“It’s alright, Lieutenant,” he replied, “I understand.”.

Bumblebee nods. “Alright, so, what’s your plan?”

Starscream smiled. “I have an idea on how to get this done efficiently, if you’ll hear me out.”.

Bumblebee raised a brow. “The stage is yours, Starscream.”.

…

They’d found Breakdown nearby, the brute of a Decepticon bashing his fists against a trailer, completely unguarded and unfocused. Starscream flew downward, transforming before he hit the ground, the impact from his landing making the ground tremble slightly. Overload whipped around, before he froze at the sight. Starscream straightened himself out, then glared at Overload. The Decepticon spy spluttered.

“Commander Starscream!” he blurted, “You… you’re here?”

“Overload,” Starscream started, keeping his expression neutral, “what exactly are you doing here?”

The Decepticon blinked, completely focused on the mech before him, oblivious to Bumblebee easily sneaking behind where he stood.

“Well, Commander, I am trying to,” he struggles to speak, “lure in Optimus Prime, of course. Lure him by harming these,,, strange creatures.”.

Starscream snorts. “So this pathetic display of behaviour from you is meant to lure in the leader of the Autobots? Please. Optimus Prime would not fall nor care for such a tactile ruse. Besides, you neither know of his location, status, or have any form of communicating your current intention to other Autobots. So all you are doing is wasting time and energy on folly. I’d expect better from one of our best spies.”.

He took great pleasure in watching Overload stutter and stumble, the pathetic oaf. Bumblebee was already close behind him, waiting for the signal.

“W-well commander, I merely-”

“I do not want to hear your excuses, Overload,” he snapped, “You show yourself to be an embarrassment to the cause by doing such pathetic activities. Megatron would be most displeased by your attempts to lure in Autobots into a fight. And without any sort of back up? You have truly stooped to pathetic levels. It’s disappointing.”.

Just as Overload was about to protest, to say anything to his defence, Bumblebee attacked. He pressed the blaster to his back, firing a shot right into the wedges of plate and into the sensitive mesh. The shot impacted, Overload shouting in pain, swivelling around. Bumblebee struck him across the face, several times, knocking him to the ground. The Decepticon spy was blindsighted, and Bumblebee took the opportunity presented, changing his grip on the blaster, and whacked the end of it against his face, knocking him out before he had a chance to react. He thudded against the ground, out cold. The minicons were still in their alternative modes, attached to Overload, with the impact seemingly knocking them out too, given that they were not trying to transform.

Bumblebee put his blaster away, looking up at Starscream.

“You still do that pompous commanding voice real well Scream,” he grinned, squatting down to get a grip on Overload.

Starscream rolled his eyes, grabbing onto Overload’s pedes.

“Laugh all you wish, Bumblebee,” he grunted as he helped hoist the unconscious lug up, “but it certainly came in handy, wouldn’t you agree?”.

Bumblebee chuckled.

…

They’d managed to drag Overload back to camp, though with considerable effort. Shoving him in a stasis pod at last, Starscream wheezed, leaning against it as it shut.

“Good there, Starscream?” Bumblebee asked, a teasing smile present on his face.

“Oh don’t start,” Starscream retorted, “Overload is heavy. And I wasn’t born with a frame to lug around heavy objects or mechs.”.

Bumblebee only gave a lighthearted chuckle, before it subsided.

“Starscream?”

The seeker raised an optic ridge.

“Thanks,” the autobot said, “for, well, straightening me out. You were right. Without your uh, talk, I could have seriously jeopardised myself. So, thanks. For that.”.

Starscream blinks, before smiling.

“You offered me a second chance, after everything I did,” he replied, “it is only fair I return the favour, and help you when you need it.”.

Bumblebee smiled.

“I mean it. You helped me, and… you’ve proved to me that I can trust you out there. In both a fight, and to talk me out of making rash decisions. I value that. From now on, you can come on any mission. I trust you.”.

Starscream blinked, his optics wide with a bit of surprise. Bumblebee was genuine, holding out a servo with a smile. Starscream would be a liar if he said he was used to any of this. He hesitantly extended his own servo, before clasping onto Bumblebee’s servo. He attempted a smile of his own.