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Chapter Text

“I did it.” Hisoka shook the papers above his head, “We're doing Heathers.”

“You mad man.” Shalnark whispered in quiet awe.

“Bullshit.” Nobunaga stood and snatched the papers out of Hisoka's hand. “Feitan's not going to like this one. They're making you cut out framing Kurt and Ram as gay?”

“I know.” Hisoka took the papers back, “I had to make concessions.”

“No. Give that back. What else did you concede to?” Nobunaga angrily reached for the papers.

“Just some minor things.” Hisoka danced wildly on his tiptoes to keep it away.

“Come on. What did you agree to.” Chrollo sat in one of the office waiting chairs like it was a throne. It made his legs look spindly and oversized.

“Well the big thing is, I have to gender-bend all the female characters because, as you know, drag is a sin.” Hisoka sighed, “But Veronica has to remain a girl. Which, I know.” Hisoka looked at the confused faces of the troupe, “They're going to let me do drag for that part because being gay is a worse sin, and I wasn't about to lose the romance between Veronica and JD.”

“That's because you're planning on casting yourself as JD.” Uvogin threw a couch pillow at him, which Hisoka expertly dodged.

“Yeah, and it ruins all the queer subtext of Veronica and Heather's relationship.” Shalnark kicked the leg of Uvogin's chair.

Hisoka rolled his eyes. It was true of course. The best part of the show was the queer subtext, as it was with any show with queer subtext, but he had been selfish, and this way, he could manipulate the casting to get who he wanted in the spot. Part of him did think that this was self-sabotage, but the other part could console himself by saying that the PTA would have an aneurism if they saw two boy characters performing a used-to-be romance.

“If you would like to go back in there, and reargue the censoring, be my guest.” Chrollo said from his mini throne, “Hisoka did us a great favor. We have to take what we can get. Now, we have a play to put on.”

The troupe groaned, but stood and made their way out of the office. They talked excitedly amongst themselves because even if they had to gender-bend all but one female character and scrap the queer subtext, they were still putting on Heathers. (Not the musical. “Any music outside of choir is a sin” - St Balthasar's School for Boys school board)

“You really did it.” Chrollo whispered to Hisoka.

“Of course I did,” He threw his arm around Chrollo “Ye of little faith.”

“I do have faith, just in a more powerful God than you.” Chrollo let out a small smile.

“My dear friend, there is no greater God than me.” Hisoka beamed.

“Who are you going to cast as Veronica?” Chrollo swallowed his smile.

“I don't know.”

“Liar. I know you're going to cast yourself as JD. Even though, I'm the obvious choice.” He pointed to himself dramatically, “So who are you going to cast as Veronica?”

“I really don't know. If only you trusted me.” Hisoka crossed his arms and put on an fake pout.

“Is it me?” Chrollo stopped and looked at Hisoka, expectantly.

Hisoka snorted, “Nope.”

Chrollo's look of hope dropped back down to his usual carefree demeanor. “Come on. They're getting ahead of us.” He walked quickly away to join the rest of the troupe.

Hisoka rolled his eyes. He had fun with Chrollo, but if he got in the way of his passion, then he'd have to be disposed of. Love was good when you could manipulate people with it, but it could get out of hand so easily. He let out a sigh and followed the troupe.

“Ok.” Hisoka looked over the script in front of him. “Clearly, the sex scene at the beginning was cut, and the word suicide can't be used.”

“Are you kidding?” Chrollo grabbed the script.

Hisoka used the end of his pen to tap one of the lines, “I thought teenage self-sabotage: don't do it might work.”

“None of this is going to work. Why did I think you could make Heathers G rated.”

“Because you're in love with me. Creepo, and I can. Bisky doesn't care what I do. She won't even show up to rehearsal. I'll change it then.” Hisoka snatched the script back.

“You should really call her Mrs. Krueger.”

“Ms. She got a divorce.” Hisoka flipped through the script.

“Really?”

“Yeah. I spent an hour in the staff room after school while she cried about it. Hey, what should happen at the Remington party because they can't have alcohol?”

“I was thinking about that last night. I think you cut the party and just make Heather sick.” Chrollo leaned back in his chair.

“But then why would Heather be mad at Veronica?” Hisoka sighed.

“She was late brining her medicine because she was with JD?” Chrollo ventured.

“Bringing him medicine remember. Maybe I can just make Heather bitchy because he's sick. Shit. Heather's a girls name.” Hisoka groaned.

Leorio slapped a sheet of paper onto the table in the library. “We should audition.” The flyer was promoting auditions for the school play titled “Heathens” in blue and yellow writing, making it hard to read.

“Heathens? What's that?” Kurapika asked.

“I think it's supposed to be Heathers, but they had to gender-bend the characters because we go to an all boys school.” Leorio peered over Killua's shoulder at the flyer.

“This looks dumb.” Killua rolled his eyes and passed the flyer to Gon.

“Why do you want to do this? It doesn't seem like your type of thing.” Gon handed the flyer back to Leorio.

“I like theater.” Leorio said indignantly, “Plus the school councilor said there wasn't enough art extracurriculars to 'put me above the rest'” He had spent the past two months beefing his transcript up as much as possible before it came time for college applications.

“The drama club is going to take all the good roles. There's no point.” Kurapika side-eyed the flyer.

“Come on. At least try. I need this.” Leorio looked desperately down at the paper.

“You have straight As Leorio. You don't need it.” Kurapika tried to pull the flyer out of Leorio's hands.

“Then you do Kurapika. You're grades are shit.” Killua giggled. Gon hid his smile with his hand.

“Hey.” Kurapika snapped, “My grades aren't shit. They're passing.”

Killua rolled his eyes and Gon nodded sagely.

“It wouldn't hurt to audition.” Leorio put a hand on Kurapika's shoulder.

“I'll do it.” Gon piped up.

“Me too.” Killua sighed.

They all looked to Kurapika.

“Fine. I'll audition.” Kurapika conceded.

“Great.” Leorio beamed, “It's this Saturday. I'll pick you guys up then.”

Saturday rolled around, and the air was crisp with winter. Well as much of winter as you got in Southern California. Most anyone else would describe it as balmy. 60 degrees Fahrenheit, with a slight breeze rattling the remaining leaves still clinging to the branches.

Leorio rolled up to the side of the curb in his minivan, and Kurapika and Gon slid out the back door. Leorio didn't let anyone sit in the front because they were “distracting pains in his ass that would get them all killed at one point or another”.

If anything, the theater was colder than outside. The air conditioning was blasting because Bisky said she couldn't sleep if it wasn't at least 65. That's what she was doing now, sleeping, in one of the rows at the back of the theater.

Gon looked around the amphitheater for Killua, who had been driven by his eldest brother, Illumi. When they saw each other, they ran dramatically through the center row of seats until they came together and clashed like two lovers who had been separated by the toils of war for too many years.

Illumi scoffed from his place in the second row from the front. Hisoka turned and tapped Illumi's knee with a pen. “Don't be so cynical. Young love is adorable.”

“What?” Illumi leaned forward.

“I'm calling you a cynic.” Hisoka bent his head back so he was looking at Illumi upside down.

“Oh.” Illumi glared back at Gon before turning to Hisoka with a curious look on his face, “What's your name again?”

“Hisoka.” Hisoka sighed and put out a hand, “pleasure.”

Illumi ignored the hand.

“You were in the short film I made last year. Remember?” Hisoka kept his hand outstretched.

“I know. I just didn't remember your name.” He continued to ignore the hand.

“Great!” Hisoka patted Illumi's knee instead and turned back to the stage. “Ok first is Feitan and Phinks co-auditioning. Which I didn't think was a thing.” He looked to Chrollo sitting next to him, who just shrugged, “It is now! Alright you're auditioning for Kurt and Ram, correct?”

“Yes.” Feitan said from the stage.

“I don't want to do this Feitan. Theater's fucking gay.” Phinks half-whispered.

“You've said. You're going to do great.” Feitan grumbled.

The auditions went on like this for a while. No one really took it seriously except Shalnark and Nobunaga. The rest of the Troupe was there for Chrollo, and Chrollo was there for Hisoka.

Then, a miracle happened, and that miracle's name was Kurapika. He was like a gift from God. It was his first time acting except for school plays about digestion in 3rd grade, so he had not brought anything to read. Hisoka had given him a monologue from the movie as he was not yet done with the script.

“Transfer to Washington. Transfer to Jefferson. Nobody at Westerburg is going to let you play their reindeer games.” Kurapika spat, and then took a deep breath, handing Hisoka the script, “Thanks.” He said as he walked off stage.

The rest of the auditions passed with the only other stand out actor being Gon, who besides the obvious correlation of color scheme, had the same underlying resentment as Heather Duke.

Hisoka scribbled down notes, slowly inching the paper away from Chrollo every time he tried to peek over his shoulder. Chrollo refused to audition, but it was ok. Hisoka had cast him in enough short films outside of school that he knew Chrollo's ability. He was good but not exceptional. Not like Kurapika or...

Hisoka turned around again, “You're going to audition right?”

“No.” Illumi crossed his arms.

“Come on.” Hisoka poked him in the knee, “You were so good in my movie last year.”

“Play's are different.” Illumi brushed Hisoka's hand away, “You can't retake shots.”

“That's what practice is for. Also, I never had to retake a shot with you in it. You were always perfect the first time.” It was true. In fact, he was more than perfect.

His secondary lead was sick, and couldn't make it. “It's due tomorrow Chrollo. What am I going to do?” Hisoka spat. His chest felt like it was closing in around itself.

“Just have someone else do it.” Illumi said. At that point, he was just an extra that Hisoka had forgotten about.

“No one else knows the lines,” Hisoka half-yelled, “Idiot.”

“I know the lines.” Illumi mumbled.

“Why do you know Hanzo's lines?”

“I know all the lines,” Illumi scoffed, “I memorized the script like you said.”

Hisoka's face softened, “All of it? Not just your bit?”

“You said to memorize it.” Illumi flipped through the pages.

“Oh thank God. You really didn't have to do that, but thank you.” Hisoka cupped Illumi's head in his hands and kissed him on the mouth. Illumi grimaced, but got into position and they started filming.

He was usually so placid with only the occasional look of mild disgust or worry, but in front of the camera his face exploded. He could contort his features any way he wanted and cry on command. That was the day Hisoka fell in love. Just a little bit. Just like he fell in love with everybody a little bit, and it only grew. Every day when Illumi ignored his smiles in the hall, or when Hisoka sat next to him in science class it grew just a little bit. Hisoka liked a challenge, and when Illumi told him he forgot his name, that love become more like an obsession.

Illumi snatched the sample script, and began to read. “Dear Diary-”

“You're not going to go on stage?” Hisoka asked.

“Do you want me to read this or no?”

Hisoka shook his head and gestured for Illumi to go on.

“My teen angst bullshit has a body count,” Illumi continued.

Once he finished, he handed the script back to Hisoka, and Hisoka kissed his palm and patted Illumi's cheek.

Illumi shot him a glare that would have said something that started with an f and ended with a ucking fairy if it was translated to spoken word. Hisoka threw back two thumbs up and turned to his notes.

“Alright! That's it. I'll have the cast list out by 3 pm Monday outside the theater ok.” Hisoka beamed to the clump of disinterested students.

The kids filed out of the building, chattering amongst themselves. Killua tried to slip out to go home with Gon, Kurapika, and Leorio, but he was pulled back by his collar.

“Mom's making dinner tonight.” Illumi bent down to Killua's height like he was a toddler.

“Exactly, Mom's cooking sucks.” Killua shoved his hands in his pockets, “Can't I go to Gon's?”

“No.” Illumi squeezed Killua's shoulder and shot a look at Gon, “You have schoolwork.”

“I finished it all.” Killua moved his shoulder out of Illumi's hold.

“SAT prep then.” Illumi dragged Killua out of the building.

“I'm a freshman Illumi.” Killua groaned before disappearing around the corner.

“I'm just going to walk home.” Gon shrugged.

“You sure?” Leorio put a hand on his hip, “It's kind of cold.”

Kurapika threw him a smile, “It's 70 degrees out.”

Leorio, who had lived in Southern California his whole life, just rolled his eyes. “It's the wind chill Kurapika. You Northerners are weird.”

“I'm from Sacramento.” Kurapika laughed.

“Bye!” Gon smiled and waltzed out the door.

“Come one Sunshine. I'll drive you home.” Leorio put an arm around his shoulder.

“Do you think we'll get cast?” Killua asked Leorio, Gon, and Kurapika who were floating in little bubbles on his phone, while he leaned on his stack of unopened SAT books.

“Well Kurapika will.” Gon was perched on top of his dresser.

“What does that mean?” Killua glared.

“You're not very good,” Leorio was hidden by stacks of opened SAT books, “Kurapika, on the other hand, actually has a chance.”

“I'm not that bad!”

“You just read off the paper like it was an essay.” Gon was trying to balance all his weight on his elbows

“No. I've heard people read essays better than that.” Leorio flipped the page of his giant book.

“Kurapika. You didn't think I was that bad did you?”

“Do you really think I have a chance?” Kurapika looked up from where he was fiddling with his hands in his lap. Killua groaned and flopped back down onto his chair.

“Hell yeah you have chance.” Leorio slammed his book shut, focusing all his attention on Kurapika, “You're amazing.”

“Hm. I don't want to get too excited. The drama club is so self-centered. One of them will probably get Heather Chandler.” Kurapika tried to push down the excitement brimming in his chest.

“Have some confidence Kurapika!” Gon said. He had successfully balanced on his hands and had his feet above his head.

“You're going to fall Gon. Get down from there.” Leorio snapped.

Gon flipped off the dresser, “You're like an old man Leorio.”

“I am not like an old man. I'm 17.” Leorio pushed his glasses up on his nose and buried himself back in his prep book like it was the morning paper.

“You drive a minivan Leorio.” Kurapika whispered.

“I don't want to hear it.” Leorio grumbled.

Killua prepared to say something rude, but a knock at his door interrupted him. He frantically flipped the pages of his SAT book open and grabbed a pencil, “I have to go. Bye.” He said hastily before hanging up.

“Dinner's ready Kil.” Illumi called from the other side of the door.

“Just finishing this problem.” Killua called back.

“I heard you talking with your friends. Can you just come out here?”

Killua grimaced and got up to open his door. “What'd she make?”

“Nothing. I talked her out of it and made pesto pasta.”

“Really?” Killua eyed his brother, “Thanks.” He paused in the doorway, “Do you think I'm a bad actor Illumi?”

“Yeah.”

Killua scoffed and pushed Illumi out of his way. “Asshole.” He muttered under his breath.

“I didn't put broccoli in yours.”

“Whatever.” Killua stomped off, “Thank you.”

Monday rolled around and with it came an air of excitement. A tired looking Uvogin handed out papers with the cast list on it to anyone who asked for one.

Leorio slipped through the crowd and snatched one out of the hands of a tiny freshman. “Thanks.” He ruffled the kids hair and went back to Gon, Killua, and Kurapika.

“Are we in it?” Gon clung to Killua's shoulder and hopped up and down. Kurapika was staring at his shoes and picking at the skin around his fingernails.

Leorio side-eyed him, “Excited? Because 4 days ago you were making fun of me for wanting to do this.”

“Things change.” Kurapika looked up, “Did I get it?”

“I haven't looked yet.” Leorio wrung the paper between his hands.

“Let me see.” Killua grabbed the paper and looked down the list. “Shit. I'm not on here.”
Gon giggled, “Look.” He pointed at the paper giddily.

“What?” Leorio took the paper back from the giggling Killua and Gon. He squinted under his glasses to see the paper, “Are you fucking kidding me. I'm the dad?” He ran his finger down the page, “Both dads? Oh Gon's Heather Duke. Good for you kiddo.”

“You can't be mad about that casting and then use the word kiddo.” Kurapika laughed. He took a deep breath, “So?”

Leorio tapped the paper and grimaced, “Chandler's barely in it. This is much better.”

“What?” Kurapika took the paper.

Veronica...............................................................................................................................Illumi Zoldyck
J.D......................................................................................................................................Hisoka Amorou
Heath Chandler...................................................................................................................Chrollo Lucilfer
Heath McNamara.................................................................................................................Kurapika Kurta
Heath Duke..............................................................................................................................Gon Freecss
Kurt Kelly.............................................................................................................................Phinks Magcub
Ram........................................................................................................................................Feitan Portor
Marty Dunstock................................................................................................................Franklin Bordeau
Mr. Fleming...................................................................................................................Nobunaga Hazama
Father Ripper.................................................................................................................Uvogin Wbererguin
Peter Dawson.......................................................................................................................Shalnark Sharu
Rodney..........................................................................................................................Bonolenov Ndongo
Stoner.............................................................................................................................Leorio Paradinight
Veronica's dad................................................................................................................Leorio Paradinight
Kurt's dad.......................................................................................................................Leorio Paradinight
Officer 1.....................................................................................................................................Zushi Zooc
Officer 2.............................................................................................................................Youpi Menthuth
Hot Probs DJ ........................................................................................................................Kortopi Cohlto

“McNamara?” He took a moment to go over the rest of the list, “You're fucking kidding me. Chrollo? He didn't even audition!” Kurapika stormed off to complain to Hisoka.

It wasn't that he wasn't ok with playing McNamara. In fact, Leorio was right. Chandler was barely in it, but Chrollo had gotten the part. That was what stung.

Last year, they had taken chemistry together because Chrollo needed to make up a credit. It was important to Kurapika that he did well because grade ten had really taken a toll on his GPA, and getting into a good college had been on his mind recently. Chrollo thought the class was below him and rarely did his work, so when Kurapika had to do a project with him he was skeptical. At the beginning, Chrollo had been helpful and offered to do his half of the work with enthusiasm, but when presentation day came along, he hadn't done any of it. Which was fine because Kurapika had done his share and Chrollo was notorious for missing work, but then Chrollo had done something inconceivable. He had pulled the Christian card. Kurapika loathed religion and wasn't opposed to sharing his view on it, which made him unpopular with the staff at the Christian all boys school. Chrollo, however, was so devout that, apparently, he couldn't complete his half of the work, and that Kurapika had been quite cruel about it. That wasn't true. It was a lie, and Kurapika hated liars, especially when people believed them. Which is exactly what happened. Kurapika got a D, which meant that his GPA was only going to get worse. The worst part though was that Chrollo got a C. Kurapika hated him, and the fact that he lied and cheated and didn't put in the work. He hadn't auditioned and yet...

Kurapika pushed Hisoka. “What the fuck is this.” He shoved his finger into the paper.

“Cast list.” Hisoka drawled.

“Why Chrollo?”

“I'll be honest-”

Kurapika guffawed.

“It was a tossup between you and him Sunshine.” Hisoka shrugged.

“Don't call me that.” Kurapika spat, “He didn't audition, and I've seen those stupid movies you make. He's not that good. What made him better than me? What can I do to make you take the role from him?”

“Hm.” Hisoka looked at his nails, painted a dark purple, “Two blowjobs?” He laughed, “Lighten up. I'm joking. Listen,” He put an arm around Kurapika's shoulder, “Chrollo gets pissy if he doesn't get what he wants. He was surefire to make scene if he didn't get the part. Don't be like Chrollo,” Hisoka pinched Kurapika's cheek, “Ok Sunshine?”

“Don't call me that.” Kurapika shrugged out of Hisoka's grip, “You don't understand. I don't have good grades, and my extracurriculars aren't anything special. One of the leads in the school play might be able to get me into whatever college Leorio plans on going to, or at least one in the area.”

Hisoka's smile dropped, “I don't care. I don't feel like doing this. You got the fourth billed role so don't be a bitch. Now, I have to go before anyone else tries to complain about casting. Goodbye Kurapika.” He turned and slipped around the corner.

Where he promptly bumped into Illumi. “Shit.” He muttered before brightening, “Hey. Congrats.”

“I don't want this.” Illumi pushed the cast list into Hisoka's chest as if not holding it anymore would make it not his problem.

“You auditioned,” Hisoka shrugged, “And did a mighty good job if I do say so myself.”

“No,” Illumi shook his head, “You made me. Also this is a girl's role.”

“You have long hair. It's fine.”

“No. It's not fine.” Illumi pushed the paper further into Hisoka's chest, but he would not take it, “I'm not wearing a skirt, and I'm not doing this role. God, just take the paper.”

“No.” Hisoka side stepped, making Illumi stumble forward a step. “Are you going to cry?”

Illumi straightened and took a breath, “I can't wear a dress.”

“Fine. I'll have to fight for it, but anything for you babe.” Hisoka squeezed Illumi's shoulder.

Illumi peered skeptically at the hand, “Also you need to cast Killua.”

“Absolutely not. He's horrible.” Hisoka laughed.

“He's not that bad. I won't do it unless you cast him.”

Hisoka took the cast list from Illumi and looked it over, “Fine, but someone's going to have to break it to poor Zushi.”

“Well It's not going to be me.” Illumi took the paper, and brushed past Hisoka.

“He's not going to wear a dress?” Machi crossed her arms and eyed Hisoka.

“No.” Hisoka shook his head.

“And you don't have anyone's measurements?”

“I have my own.” Hisoka handed her a slip of paper with a series of numbers scribbled on it.

“I already have yours and Chrollo's.” She snatched the paper, “These aren't right.”

“I eyeballed it.” Hisoka sat down next to her, “Thank you for doing the costumes.”

“As long as you're paying me.”

“Well, technically Chrollo's doing that.”

Machi scoffed.

“What?” Hisoka sat up to look at her.

“Nothing.” There was a brief pause, “It's just that you make him do too much for you.”

“He's easy to manipulate. I can't help myself.” Hisoka frowned.

“He really likes you. It's not right.”

Hisoka shrugged. He liked that Chrollo liked him. In some ways, Hisoka loved him back just like he loved everyone. Just like he loved Machi. Well, not exactly like Machi. He liked Machi because she was a challenge, and he liked Chrollo because he was easy and therefore would bend to his design. Directing was the closest thing to what he was passionate about, and that was manipulating people to act how he pleased, seeing how they reacted under the carrot or the stick. No one was better at manipulation than Hisoka.

“Who's Illumi Zoldyck?” Machi roused Hisoka from his musings.

“He was in that movie I made last year.” A smile spread across his face.

Machi angled her phone to take a picture of Hisoka and turned the image to him, “That's how Chrollo looks at you.”

Hisoka scoffed, “Excuse me?”

“You always have some weird ulterior motive, and you kept Veronica a girl. I assume so you could keep the romance. Which is weird because everyone knows the best part is the subtext-”

“Between Veronica and Heather. I know.” Hisoka finished. “Why do you care who I care about.”

“I don't give a shit about you, but I do care about Chrollo. Don't force him to do anything he doesn't want to ok?” Machi ran a hand through her hair.

“That's the problem,” Hisoka tried to push down a grin, “He really wants to.”

Chapter Text

“Dear Diary,” Illumi began.

The cast sat in the back room of the theater, reading the script that Hisoka had completed last night in a fit of panic induced productivity. The combination of the school board's censoring and Hisoka's par writing skills had turned it into a mangled version of what it once was.

“Heath said that people learn about real life from him.” Illumi went on.

“You're really not going to wear a dress.” Chrollo interrupted.

Illumi looked up from the script, “No. I'm not.”

“You know how hard that's going to be on all of us especially Hisoka?”

Illumi looked around the table, “If it's too hard I don't have to do the play.” He began shoving his script into his bag. It wasn't hostile. He just didn't care.

“No. It's not hard at all sweetheart.” Hisoka put his hand out.

Illumi's eye twitched, but he took the script out and set it back on the table.

“Great.” Hisoka turned to Kurapika, “Why don't we skip to the part where McNamara tries to kill himself. I want to see how it reads.”

“Yeah about that.” Kurapika was staring intently at the paper, “What's supposed to be happening in this scene?”

“Well, I'm not allowed to mention suicide, so he's trying to call a psychic to contact Chandler's ghost, but they live on the other side of the world so the phone bill's really expensive.”

Kurapika looked skeptically at the scene.

“It's a metaphor.” Hisoka leaned his chair on the two back legs, “You got to admit I'm pretty creative.”

“You certainly have a lot of ideas,” Kurapika sighed, “I'm still supposed to read this like I'm committing suicide, right?”

“Exactly. You catch on so quick.” Hisoka squeezed his shoulder.

Kurapika scooched his chair away and began. “Curse my shaky hands.” His voice wobbled up at the ends, making Hisoka's clumsy dialogue sound almost real.

“Heath!” Illumi interjected.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to stop you from making a huge mistake.” Illumi paused, and his voice dropped to his usual placid tone, “This dialogue is bad.”

Hisoka looked to Chrollo, half-expecting him to defend him, but he was just grimacing at his script.

“Thank you for the critique. I'll keep that in mind during the re-writes. Will you continue?” Hisoka smiled sweetly.

“Coping is supposed to be private.” Kurapika went on.

The scene reading continued for around an hour before the janitor ushered them out of the back room to lock it up. The cast filed out the double doors mumbling critiques about Hisoka's writing.

“Hey.” Hisoka skipped up a few steps and grabbed Illumi's hand.

Illumi turned his wrist against the gap between Hisoka's thumb and pointer finger, breaking his hold, “What?”

“Just wondering if you're free after school on Monday?” Hisoka placed his hand on his hip.

“No.” He paused “For what?”

“For costume measurements. It'll only take a moment just in the back room of the theater.” Hisoka nodded to the door behind them.

“Who's going to be doing the measuring?” Illumi eyed the door.

Hisoka chuckled, “Chrollo's friend Machi. She prefers to get measurements herself. Doesn't trust anyone else, so it would be great if you'd drop by.”

“Sure.” Illumi shrugged and went off to find Killua.

Leorio walked the halls, going to meet Kurapika, Gon, and Killua in the library at Kurapika's request. When he opened the door, Kurapika was slowly pacing by the window while Gon and Killua giggled about something at a small table.

“What's the problem?” He asked, sitting down next to Gon.

“I hate Chrollo.” Kurapika spat, broken from his reverent train of thought.

“Really?” Killua mocked, cheesy grin spread across his face.

“He doesn't deserve the role.” Kurapika slammed a fist onto the table, “He's not that good, he's a bitch to Illumi, and he's not even blonde.”

“To be fair, my brother deserves it.” Killua leaned his head back on his hands.

“It's not about deserving. It's about professionalism.” Kurapika glared at him.

“Hey.” Leorio put his hand on Kurapika's, “Like you said, the drama club's self-centered, and McNamara is a great character.”

“It's not about McNamara.” Kurapika spun on his heel and looked out the window, casting a glow around him.

“Then what's it about?” Gon looked to Kurapika's glowing visage.

“If Chrollo wants to be Chandler,” A small smile tugged at Kurapika's mouth, “Then I'll make him Heath Chandler.”

“Come in.” Machi's voice was muffled through the door.

Illumi pushed it open, cautiously, “Hi. Are you Machi?”

“Yeah.” She stood and grabbed her tape measure, “You're Illumi, right?”

He nodded.

“I'm just going to take some measurements. It'll only take a second. What's your pant size. Just so I know if I already have anything that'll fit.”

“36.” He said and lifted an arm so she could find his wingspan.

She sucked in through her teeth, “I don't think I have anything that'll work, but I'll make something if I have to.”

“I'm sorry I can't wear girl's clothes.” Illumi picked at the hem of his shirt while Machi wrapped the tape around his hips.

“It's fine.” She shrugged, “I like sewing pants better anyway. Hey doesn't your dad work at the school?”

Illumi turned to her, “Yes. He's the school's pastor.”

“Right.” Machi scribbled down some numbers on a note pad, “Hisoka complains about him all the time. Apparently, he's a bitch when it comes to censoring. Oh.” She looked up to Illumi, “I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that.”

“No. It's fine.” Illumi smiled a little, “My dad complains about Hisoka too. I haven't told him I'm the lead in the play yet. It'll be a big surprise when they come to see Killua.”

She laughed a little under her breath, “Alright. You're all done.” Her phone buzzed lighting up with a picture of a girl with short black hair and big round glasses.

“Who's that.” Illumi leaned over, noticing that she was wearing a St. peter's cross.'

“It's my girlfriend, Shizuku.” Machi smiled.

“Oh.” Illumi grabbed his bag and hurried to the doorway. He looked like he was going to ask her something, but thought better of it started to turn down the hallway.

“Are you coming to the party on Saturday?” Machi stopped him.

“No. I'm just going to spend some time with my brother.” Illumi responded before walking away.

Hisoka's shoes clacked symphonies against the linoleum. When he spotted Gon and Killua, he lay his weight on Gon's locker, nearly slamming it on his hand.

“Hey!” He rubbed his arm as if it had been crushed.

“What do you want?” Killua glared.

'Always with Gon.' Hisoka thought. It made them vulnerable.

“There's a party this Saturday. Do you want to come?” He beamed.

“Freshman aren't allowed to go,” Killua grabbed Gon's hand, “Let's leave.”

“They are if they're invited by a senior.” Hisoka grabbed onto Gon's other hand. He stood suspended between them like a marionette.

“Why would you invite us?” Killua tugged at Gon's hand.

“Because theater is a family. I want you there.” Hisoka tugged back.

“Um. Killua's not allowed to go to parties.” Gon wriggled free of both their grasps.

“Yeah. Not until I'm 18, so it doesn't matter whether you invite us or not.” Killua stuffed his hands in his pockets.

“Come on.” Hisoka mimicked his posture, “I'll drive you, and it's not like Illumi's going to be there. Who's going to tell?”

Killua shot a glance at Gon, “What if Milluki's there?” He hissed.

“Milluki's your brother?” Hisoka leaned back against the lockers, “Why do all of your siblings look nothing a like? Can you tell him I wanted him to play Dumptruck in the play?”

“No.” Killua snapped.

“Fine, but even if he did go, he's not 18 and would also be breaking rules.” Hisoka stuck his nose between the two, “So what do say?”

They sent furtive glances between themselves, communicating in a silent language, “Sure.” Gon said finally, “You'll drive us?”

“I'll pick you up at 8 Gon, and I'll be by that little overhang of vines on the west side of your house at 8:30 Killua. Ok?”

“How do you know what my house looks like?” Killua inched towards Gon.

“See you then.” Hisoka turned down the hallway.

Hisoka drove up to Gon's house at precisely at 8:00. His aunt lived at the end of a pretty little cul-da-sac, and there was a tree outside with a ceramic face hanging lopsided on it's trunk. In the backyard, there was a low mountain, not uncommon in California. Hisoka thought it was fitting for a boy like Gon.

He honked twice from his old rusting pickup truck. Gon rushed down the front steps and jumped into the car, leaving a disgruntled looking Aunt Mito in the doorway. She shot daggers at him with her eyes. Gon rolled down the window, literally (Hisoka had bought it second hand from an old man with Alzheimers a year a go), and waved to her.

“Thank you for letting me have you nephew!” Hisoka called.

“I'm not letting you have anything,” She called back and slammed the door.

“Nice lady.” Hisoka leaned across Gon and put the window back up.

“Isn't she?” Gon said bright as ever, “Let's go get Killua.”

They drove in silence for a while until Gon turned on the radio. He spent a while trying to get the old knobs to change to a channel which wasn't static. They ended up on Mexican Rock which bothered neither of them so they listened while they rolled across the wide busy streets. Gon hummed the tunes under his breath occasionally throwing in a few of the lyrics. It didn't sound like he knew the songs, but his Spanish was good enough to fool Hisoka for a while.

“Do you speak Spanish?” Hisoka clicked his blinker on and turned down a residential street.

“Yup.” Gon sat up straight, “My family's from Mexico, but I also speak French, German, and a little Japanese. Enough to fool someone who doesn't at least.”

“That's amazing Gon. You're really a miracle.” Hisoka spoke several languages himself, but he wasn't one to brag unnecessarily.

Besides, Gon interrupted before he could continue, “We're here!” He pointed out the window to Killua's two story white picket house at the end of his own cul-da-sac.

Hisoka turned down a small side road that branched off by the end of the street. It ended under an out-cropping of vines that were just below Killua's room.

Killua's bright eyes appeared in the thick of greenery, followed by the rest of him. He opened the door and climbed over Gon into the back seat.

“Hi.”

“Hi.” Killua and Gon whispered eagerly to each other.

“Ready?” Hisoka crunched the car into reverse and put an arm around the back of Gon's seat to look out the rear window.

“Ready.” Killua said giddily, clicking his seatbelt into place.

“Alrighty boys.” Hisoka reversed down the side road and careened out of the cul-da-sac, “This is going to be fun.”

The room was dimly lit by a couple of lamps. Music shook the house, and people stumbled around, close to blackout even this early into the evening.

“Ok. Some ground rules.” Hisoka crouched in front of Killua and Gon, “No drugs, clearly, and no alcohol.”

Killua rolled his eyes, but Gon bounced up and down, just happy to be there.

“Are you serious.” Killua raised an eyebrow.

“No.” Hisoka laughed, “Vodka?” He handed the boys two cups and watched them run off into the thick of it. “Ah. Youth. Hey Chrollo.” Hisoka turned to Chrollo who was looming behind him.

“Why did you bring them?” Chrollo said without antipathy.

“Theaters a family.” Hisoka rattled off.

Chrollo just let out a low laugh and poured himself a cup of bright blue liquid.

“What are you drinking?” Hisoka tipped the top of the cup and peered into it.

“I don't know.” Chrollo looked at the swirling liquid. At second glance it appeared to shimmer.

“Hm.” Hisoka picked it up, took a sip, and then pressed his lips to Chrollo's, spitting the liquid into his mouth. “I don't like it.” He remarked.

Chrollo wiped his mouth off with the back of his hand, “I do.”

“I bet. I'm going to go find Machi.” Hisoka jutted his thumb behind him.

An hour later Hisoka's mind was blurring at the edges, and he was dancing extremely close with Pakunoda, or rather Pakunoda was dancing and he just happened to be there. Regardless, he was getting glared at by Nobunaga, and Chrollo was shooting glances at him from the corner of his eye.

It dawned on Hisoka that he had not seen Gon nor Killua since arriving. Maybe he should make sure they were ok.

Hisoka whispered a goodbye to Pakunoda, which she barely registered and went to find them. He was stopped, however, by Chrollo's hand on his arm. Chrollo whispered something about needing to talk to him in another room.

Gon and Killua would be fine. Besides, it'd just make him look better the drunker they got.

He followed Chrollo to an office lined in book shelves and an old looking desk underneath a window at the back. A large armchair sat in the corner of the room, and after a minute of Chrollo mumbling some excuses, Hisoka pushed him into it and got on top of him.

“No. I really did want to ask you...” Chrollo trailed off, “Yeah actually.”

“Hm.” Hisoka hummed before starting to suck at the pale skin on Chrollo's neck. “Oh wait. First.” He took out his phone and sent a text, “Alright.” He said and got back to work.

Ten minutes later and right on cue, the front door slammed open. It registered in the back of Hisoka's mind as his hands wandered up Chrollo's shirt, thumb rubbing at the scar his botched appendix removal had left him with.

The door to the office opened and Kurapika stuck his head in, “Hey. Oh. I'm sorry.” He kept his eyes off the two in the chair, “Illumi's here, and he's looking for you Hisoka.”

“Good.” Hisoka removed himself from Chrollo's sweaty grip. He used to think that was charming. How desperate he got. Now it just made him kind of sick.

When Hisoka exited the office, he saw Illumi standing hunched in the doorway, eyes darting around the room until they landed on Hisoka. “Where is he?” Illumi seethed.

Hisoka put his hands in his pockets, and walked over to Illumi, feigning concern, “I don't know. I noticed him around ten minutes ago, but I have no clue where Killua's run off to now. Do you want a drink? You look tense.” Hisoka grabbed an abandoned solo cup and handed it to Illumi, “Here.”

Illumi slapped it out of his hand, sending the fire ball inside flying.

“You're the one who brought him.” Illumi hissed.

“Why would I do that, and then tell you he was here?” Hisoka took a hand out of his pockets and leaned against the door frame behind Illumi. It was farther away than he had expected and they landed nose to nose.

“What other idiot would invite my annoying freshman brother to a party. Only you are that insufferable.” He spat. Maybe Hisoka was just drunk, but he could've sworn Illumi was slurring his words.

“Come on. I'll help you find him.”

“You brought him here,” Illumi jabbed his finger into Hisoka's chest, “To goad me out of my house. To get me drunk. To fucking,” He bit his cheek, “You and your hair, and makeup, and the way you dress,” Illumi gestured at Hisoka, “I should've known.”

“What are you implying?” Hisoka leaned against the granite island, smiling brightly.

“Fuck you.”

Killua chose that moment to breach through the crowd, “Illumi. Please let me explain.”

Illumi went over, grabbing Killua's shoulder. “We're going.” He whispered as he dragged Killua out of the house.

“Wait,” Hisoka followed the pair out of the house. The night air made his skin break out in gooseflesh.

“Go fuck yourself.” Illumi said without turning. He opened the door to a blue Prius, throwing Killua into the back seat.

“Oh. I would love to, but I don't know how. People usually do it for me.” Hisoka laughed, placing his hands on the hood of Illumi's car.

“People shouldn't do things for you. You don't deserve it.” Illumi shoved the car into drive.

Hisoka's smile faltered for a moment before returning brighter than ever, “Come on Illumi. I've never seen you at one of these things. You should lighten up and come inside.”

“I'm taking my 14 year old brother home. Get out of my way.”

“He was enjoying it.” Hisoka shrugged.

Killua shook his head when Illumi turned back to him. “It was horrible. I've really learned my lesson.”

Illumi scoffed and turned back to Hisoka, “I will run you over. Get out of my way.”

“You wouldn't.” Hisoka dared.

They stared at each other. Hisoka watched the way Illumi's ragged breathing shook his chest and the way it disrupted the loose hairs around his head. His eyes were so wide and dark. They reflected what he stared at, blowing it out into impossible proportion. Illumi watched Hisoka's tongue move slowly across his top row of teeth, dipping as it reached his dangerously sharp canines. He had a very girly mouth.

Illumi shook his head and broke the eye-contact.

Hisoka, taking this as a win, propped his hands on his hips.

The car surged forward, throwing Hisoka over the hood. He went crashing into the ground as the Prius sped off, far too quickly for the residential street they were on.

Hisoka groaned, “Fuck.” He rolled around on the ground a little for good measure. Nothing felt broken or seriously injured, but he also didn't feel like getting up.

“Are you ok?” Machi asked. She didn't sound like she cared all that much.

Hisoka frowned and stood, “I'm fine. The car probably has it worse. You want to do shots?”

Machi raised an eyebrow, “Do you want to sit down for a bit first?”

“No.” Hisoka brushed loose gravel from his shirt.

“Then yeah.”

They walked back into the house, passing by a frantic looking Gon rushing to call his aunt.

On Monday's, Hisoka had chemistry. For the first few weeks, he had hated it. He was horrible at science, or rather he didn't like it enough to try, so it meant bad grades and meetings with teachers. Two months in, however, a group of kids in the back had been roughhousing and that meant a seating arrangement. Hisoka didn't really care, at first. Wherever he sat it would be the same.

“Row three, Hisoka, then Illumi, and...” The teacher had read off.

Wonderful! Not only could he get Illumi to talk to him, but Illumi had perfect grades, and would be easy to cheat off.

The first part of that plan had not worked, as Illumi did not know his name up until a few weeks ago, but the second part was going great.

That's what he was doing now, cheating. He peered over to Illumi's test, and began trying to decipher his messily scrawled answers, but something at the top of the page drew his attention away.

'I'm sorry'

Hisoka smiled down at the note. 'Don't worry about it.' He thought. Everything was going just fine.

Ideally Hisoka would have acted the hero, telling Illumi about his irresponsible brother, but he knew Illumi wasn't stupid. Him catching on was part of the plan. Hisoka had not expected that exact reaction, but who would. An 'I'm sorry' was the best case scenario, and it meant he could move forward.

“Hey.” Hisoka ran up to Illumi after class and tapped him on the shoulder, “Thanks for letting me cheat off you.”

“You were cheating?” Illumi deadpanned and turned away.

Hisoka grabbed his arm, “I was wondering if you'd like to make it up to me?”

“Make what up to you?” Illumi cocked his head.

Alright. Illumi was going to pretend nothing had happened. Which meant he was back to square two.

“Nothing. I have to block some scenes, and I was hoping you could come with me after school to help.” Hisoka flashed his perfect smile.

“I'll have to ask my dad, but it should be fine.”

“Cool. I'll meet you by your dad's office.”

“Ok.” Illumi walked away.

Kurapika brushed past Hisoka, muttering lines under his breath, “Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?”

'He's taking the McNamara thing so much better than I thought he would. Good.' Hisoka thought, and made his way to his next class.

“I'm in the school play, and I need to stay after school to block one of my scenes.”

“One of your scenes? How many do you have?”

The voices were quiet behind the closed office door, and Hisoka had to lean against it to hear what Illumi and his father were saying.

“A few. Can I stay?”

“How are you going to get home?”

“Hisoka has a car. He can drive me.”

“You sure?”

The door opened pushing Hisoka forward. “Hey.” He brushed some imaginary dust off his shirt.

“Can you drive me home?” Illumi asked.

“Of course.”

Illumi closed the door again, “He says he'll drive me.”

“Be back before 8:00. Your mom's making dinner.”

“Then I'll be sure to eat before.” There was a pause, “I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-”

“No. You shouldn't have. Now go.”

Illumi pushed past Hisoka into the hall, shouldering his bag, “I have to be back by 8.”

“That's fine.” Hisoka linked their arms, “We'll just have to make good use of our time.”

Illumi grimaced and pulled away towards the auditorium.

“No. The center of the stage.” Hisoka called from a seat in the front row. They had been attempting to find “Key Points” on the dais for two and a half hours.

Illumi looked around himself, “This is the center.”

“No.” Hisoka rolled his eyes, “To your left and forward a little.”

Illumi moved a little forward and to his left.

“A little not a mile.” Hisoka sighed, “Go back.”

Illumi moved back a fraction, “Better?”

Hisoka pondered it for a moment. His eyes darted around, measuring with his mind. “Hmm.”

“Not better?” Illumi asked again.

“You were right.” Hisoka got up, “Go back to where you were.”

Illumi placed his heel against a scuff in the wood that he had noticed earlier because it was in the exact same place he had been standing. “Good?”

“That's not where you were before,” Hisoka hopped onto the stage and stood with his hands on his hips in front of Illumi, “But it is the center.”

Illumi blinked at him, “It- never mind. What scene are we doing now?”

Hisoka's heart beat in his chest so quick he thought it might break him. It was too soon.

No. It was now or never.

“The one after Duke and Veronica talk in the stairwell.” His tongue felt heavy. He rarely felt nervous, but he couldn't say he didn't like it. “I want to try something. See if it works, but the school board might kill me. Especially your dad.” Hisoka laughed.

“Alright. Do I stand here?” Illumi dug his toe into the ground.

“Perfect. Start here.” Hisoka tapped the last line before his entrance, and made his way off stage, waiting for his cue.

“Fine. Go.” Illumi spat at the non-present Heath Duke exiting stage left.

“Want to go out tonight?” Hisoka walked up from stage right, “Catch a movie?”

“I was thinking more leaving Heath Duke to be found in a ditch somewhere by some police dogs.” A small smile spread on Illumi's face as Hisoka circled him, trailing his hand along Illumi's waist.

“Now you're talking,” Hisoka kept one hand on Illumi's hip, and used the other to brush a strand of hair from his face. “I was underlining passages in her bible right before I came down here. If you catch my drift.”

He could feel Illumi's heart beating and see the breath catch in his throat. Illumi turned his head away, revealing pale skin that shone in the hot stage lights. Hisoka drew his finger down from his jaw to his clavicle. “I knew you'd be back Veronica.” He whispered, too quiet for an audience to hear. “I was positive.”

Hisoka grabbed Illumi's chin, and a little more desperately than he would like to admit, kissed him. For his efforts, he got an elbow in the stomach as Illumi pulled away.

“It's over. Over! Grow up.” Illumi's face was plastered in a look of panic and disgust. His posture was lax, a shadow of how he stood during the party last Saturday.

Hisoka stood there, open mouthed and dazed. Illumi tasted slightly sweet, like honey. It was probably chapstick. Honey. It hadn't been what Hisoka was expecting.

Illumi's grimace dropped as he straightened his posture, “It's your line.”

Acting. Of course. What had he been thinking. He didn't care about Hisoka, and he probably never would. “Sorry. I was just thinking that's probably worth dying for.”

Illumi blinked at him, “I can't do that on stage.” He muttered.

“I know.” They stood there awkwardly for a few seconds, staring at anything but each other.

“You should take me home. I live kind of far away.”

“I know that too.” Hisoka stared at his shoes, “I parked on the street, so my cars just out there.” He pointed to the auditorium exit.

Illumi followed him to his rusted pick-up and tentatively opened the door.

“It's clean.” Hisoka said lightheartedly as he hopped into the driver's seat and turned the key in the ignition. The engine rumbled to life. The knobs had broken after the party so every time the car started mexican rock squealed over the ancient speakers.

“If you say so.” Illumi said and climbed in, clutching his bag to his chest.

The music provided a nice background for the lack of conversation, and 20 minutes later they pulled up to Illumi's neighborhood. “Actually. Can you stop here?” Illumi put a hand on Hisoka's arm, and pointed out the window.

“This is two blocks from your house.” Hisoka said as he pulled over.

Illumi went to open the door. “I'm sorry.”

“For what?” Hisoka put the car into park and turned it off.

Illumi took a deep breath, and then quickly spat out, “I'm sorry I won't wear girl's clothes, and I'm sorry for running you over, and I'm sorry I can't kiss you on stage.” He paused, “I'm not too sorry about that last part because I don't think you did it for the sake of the play.”

Hisoka let out a breathy laugh, “It's ok. I get it.”

“Don't mention I'm the lead in the play to my father.” Illumi's nails dug into his back pack.

“I won't, but he's going to find out eventually.”

“I meant right now. Do you want to come have dinner with me and my family?” Illumi felt a seam in his backpack pop as he pushed his nail through it.

“Really?” Hisoka went to turn the truck back on.

“You deserve it. My mom's making dinner. Also, you'll park here. My parents can't know you drive this car.” Illumi opened his door and slid out.

Chapter Text

It took a while to get the key in the lock, but when it finally slipped in, Illumi shoved the door open so hard it hit the back wall with a thwack.

“Oops.” He muttered and toed off his shoes. “Mother!” Illumi called into the house.

“Yes?” Kikyo leaned out of the kitchen. She wore a white apron with small flowery embroidery on one of the ties over a navy suit skirt set. Her hair was tied up over her head in a bun that threatened to topple with the slightest breeze. The color of her hair was strikingly similar to Illumi's, and Hisoka wondered if their eyes would match, but they were covered by thick medical grade sunglasses. “Oh, you brought a friend.”

Illumi dropped one of his shoes suddenly and it thumped onto the floor.

She walked over to them and reached out a pale slender hand, “I'm Kikyo.”

“Hello.” Hisoka took the hand, “I'm Hisoka. Thank you for letting me stay for dinner.”

“I know who you are.” She said briskly as she turned to her son who was fiddling with the laces on his shoes, “You didn't tell me we'd have a guest.”

“Sorry, but Hisoka lives kind of far, and it's getting dark. I didn't want to make him drive all that way.” Illumi slipped his shoes into a little cubby.

“You're staying the night?” Kikyo's mouth turned down.

“I am.” Hisoka said tentatively, “If that's alright with you.”

“Perfectly fine! I'll tell your father that we have guests and to keep Mike in our room.” She brightened, and walked back to the kitchen, “Dinner is going to take a few more minutes. Feel free to go upstairs Illumi.”

“Thank you mother.” Illumi picked up his bag and walked up the stairs, followed by an excited Hisoka.

“I didn't know I was staying over.” Hisoka trailed his fingers along the pale wood of the banister.

“Is that a problem?”

“Not at all.” Hisoka laughed.

Illumi's room was spotless. Everything was ordered and neat, except for the bed, which was left unmade. Hisoka eyed it as he walked in.

“Do you have any homework?” Illumi asked.

He did, but he hadn't been planning on doing it before and he sure as hell wasn't going to do it now. “No. What do you want to do?”

Illumi pulled out his script and sat down on the carpet at the side of his bed. “Want to practice lines?”

“Sure.” Hisoka got his own script and sat down across from him. “Which scene?”

“I don't care. I've memorized all my lines already.” Illumi shrugged.

“All of your lines? That's a lot.”

“It took all night, but I have it down.” Illumi flipped through his script, while Hisoka looked on, slightly astonished. All of his lines in one night. “Do you want to do the second to last scene?”

“You're amazing.” Hisoka breathed.

Illumi blinked at him. “Can I see your hall pass?”

“Right.” Hisoka shook his head and looked down to his script. He had not memorized all his lines yet, so he still needed one. “I knew you weren't dead.”

“Like father like son.” Illumi held out his hands, mimicking brandishing a pistol. His fingertips grazed Hisoka's forehead, gentle as the wind, “An explosion in the basement to set off another one upstairs? Start by putting it down.” There was a pause while Illumi looked to the carpet beneath them, “I knew that.” He laughed. “Put your hands on your head.”

Hisoka complied, still keeping his eyes on his script. “You didn't say Simon says.” Hisoka brought an arm down and knocked the nonexistent gun out of Illumi's hands. He then ran a finger down the rest of the page, skipping past the proposed blocking and down to their next batch of dialogue.

“You think just because you started this means you can end it?” Hisoka spat.

“I'll kill you I swear.” Illumi hissed right back. “How do I stop it? It's over, just help me stop it.”

“You want a clean slate just as much as I do. Maybe everyone in this school's going to make a one way trip to heaven today because nobody loves me, but face it alright. The only place different cliques can get along with each other is in heaven”

There was a beat of silence.

“It's your line.” Hisoka looked up, “I thought you said you had these memori-”

“You're mouth is very pretty.” Illumi interjected.

Hisoka's very pretty mouth stretched into a grin, and he ran his tongue along his teeth, “Really? What makes you say that?”

“It's very feminine.” Illumi's tone indicated nothing other than observation as he reached out a hand to thumb Hisoka's bottom lip.

“Is that what you tell yourself.” Hisoka whispered. The tip of his tongue brushed the pad of Illumi's thumb.

“Sometimes.” Illumi sighed.

Was this it?' Hisoka asked himself. Was everything falling into place just like he'd planned? Right now? A little early, but who was he to complain?

The door swung open, and Illumi's hand dropped to the carpet, like it hadn't ever left his side.

“Dinner.” Zeno stood slightly slouched in the doorframe.

“Ok.” Illumi said and got to his feet. “Hisoka.” He gestured.

Hisoka smiled up to Zeno who just shrugged and turned away, leaving the door wide open.

“Do you talk to your grandfather exclusively in single word sentences?”

“Yes. Unless it's important.” Illumi held his hand out. Hisoka took the hand with enthusiasm, and pulled himself up so that they were standing chest to chest. Fabrics of their shirts brushing.

Illumi offered a small smile and followed his grandfather down the stairs.

Dinner was bad. Every bite was new, and none of it tasted good. Sometimes it would be just unseasoned fish, and then suddenly you'd have a clump of spices in a small dry ball.

“What is in this? It's great.” Hisoka said after a swig of water.

“It's just some cod and broccoli.” Kikyo said as she cut off another bite of what had just been called cod.

“I didn't know cod could be pink!” Hisoka smiled, “You're a wonderful cook Mrs. Zoldyck.”

“Don't be silly. Call me Kikyo. I can't have Illumi's only friend consider me an authority figure. Where else am I going to get information on my darling Illumi's life?”

“Alright Kikyo.” Hisoka laughed, making aggressive eye contact with Silva at the opposite end of the table. “What do you do for a living, Kikyo. I know what Silva does, clearly.”

“I run a bank.”

“That's amazing. Do you give out loans.” Hisoka leaned forward.

“Yes. I decide who gets what when.” Kikyo was smiling. No one really asked her about her job, assuming her husband was the bread winner.

“Wow.” Hisoka breathed, “Do you ever get suicide notes?”

Kikyo's smile faltered for only a moment, “Sometimes.” She turned to Killua who sat to her left. “Eat your cod dear.”

Killua cut a piece off, spices falling like snowfall, and brought it slowly to his mouth. He made a show of not chewing it, and grabbed his cup. The cup was brought slowly to his lips as Killua began to chug, until the fish to water ratio was 1:5. Only then did he swallow.

Kikyo's mouth tightened into a thin line.

“Why does Illumi get to bring home friends?” Killua tapped the corners of his mouth with a napkin.

Out of the corner of his eye, Hisoka saw Illumi falter.

“We're not really friends.” Illumi mumbled.

“What are you then? Is he your boyfriend? Because that's still a friend.” Killua hissed.

Illumi's eyes went wide and filled with ire. He kicked Killua under the table.

“Ow.” Killua pulled his knee up to his chest, “He kicked me mom.”

“Illumi, don't roughhouse at the table.” Kikyo sighed and put her fork down. “Killua, don't make such wild accusations. Of course he's not.”

Hisoka bit his very pretty feminine lip, and went back to his dinner.

The conversation drifted away from Hisoka as he focused more on his cod(?) than what the rest of the table was discussing. Two hours passed with the only consistent conversation being between Kikyo, Illumi, Silva, and Milluki who were having a spirited discussion about Milluki's bad eating habits. Kalluto and Alluka had gone to bed, Killua was pushing food around his plate, occasionally looking up to glare at Hisoka, and Zeno was concentrating on each bite of food, punctuating them with a sip of water.

Only Killua's eyes were on Hisoka. Dinner was getting boring, and Hisoka thought it was about time for a little mischief.

Making sure Killua was watching his every move, he pointed to Illumi. Killua raised an eyebrow and cocked his head. Hisoka brought his fist up to his mouth, and with a quiet breath, began mimicking a blowjob.

“Oh God.” Killua muttered and gagged.

“Yeah just like that.” Hisoka mouthed across the table. He broke out into quiet giggling, hiding his mouth in his hand. Looking up, Hisoka made eye contact with Zeno who was staring at him skeptically.

Hisoka put on his most innocent smile, before going back to his food.

“That's it.” Kikyo stood suddenly, and grabbed Milluki's half-eaten plate, “You're done.”

“Thank God because it tastes like garbage.” Milluki grumbled.

“Milluki.” Silva chided, his own barely touched plate sitting in front of him.

“Sorry.” Milluki sighed.

“I think we should let him eat whatever he pleases.” Illumi said, “If he's determined to eat himself to death before 40 there's nothing we can do to stop him.”

The table went silent at Illumi's mild-mannered comment.

“What are you looking at?” Illumi turned to Hisoka.

“Nothing.” Hisoka shook his head.

“Dick.” Milluki spat.

“Milluki. We have a guest.” Kikyo backhanded Milluki's head.

'Shithead.' Illumi mouthed at Milluki.

“Shithead?” Milluki practically yelled.

“Milluki!” Kikyo slammed the plate down on the table, sending the cod jumping like it was back in it's natural habitat.

“He said it.” Milluki pointed desperately at Illumi.

“No I didn't.” Illumi said simply, “It's wrong to lie. Thou shalt not bare false witness to thy neighbor.”

Silva nodded.

“Illumi's never cursed in his life. If you're going to lie at least make it realistic.” Kikyo rubbed her temples.

Milluki erupted into a fit of indignant spluttering, and the table went up in flames. Even Killua, who had no skin in the game a moment ago, jumped in. Illumi sat in the middle of it, back ramrod straight and eyes wide and seemingly unknowing, but a small small pulled at the corners of his mouth.

After a moment of basking in the building chaos, Illumi stood, grabbing both his and Hisoka's plates, “Hisoka and I are going to go up to my room. Goodnight.”

Kikyo just gave a slight nod and went back to berating her son.

“Keep the door unlocked.” Zeno grumbled as he handed Illumi his plate, empty much to his credit.

“Ok.”

“Slut.” Milluki spat.

The rage, that only seemed to appear at the mention of Hisoka, bloomed on Illumi's face. “What did you just call me?” His words were quiet and fury-filled.

“I called you a slu-” Milluki began before he got another smack to the back of his head. “Goddammit!”

“You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.” Silva said. It seemed they were now rattling off commandments.

“That's not even what that means.” Killua seethed.

“You're going to lecture me on the bible?” Silva scoffed.

“Yeah I am actually. You think...”

The voices trailed off as Illumi pulled Hisoka up the stairs.

“Sorry about that.” Illumi sat down on his bed and began picking at the fabric of his sheets, “They tend to excite themselves.”

“Right,” Hisoka sat on the foot of the bed and pulled one knee to his chest, “It certainly had nothing to do with you.”

“Of course not.” Illumi smiled, “I'm a darling angel. According to my mother at least.”

“One who never curses?”

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29.”

“You have a lot of those memorized huh?” Hisoka pulled up his other leg and sat criss cross.

“They come in handy.” Illumi shrugged and lay back on his headboard, looking up at the ceiling. It left his porcelain neck exposed in the warm room light.

“You're a monster.” Hisoka laughed and crawled his way up to sit next to Illumi.

“What happened to me be amazing.”

“Nothing at all.” Hisoka put his hand at his side so it would brush against Illumi's knuckles. “If I'm not your friend, what am I?”

“I don't know. You might be my friend. I've never had one. My parents don't like me having friends.” Illumi took his hand away from Hisoka's and laid it on his stomach.

“Your mom seemed really excited about it.”

“She was lying. She wants us all to stay at home, and never find something better to leave for.”

“She fooled me.” Hisoka sighed.

“Of course she did.” Nothing Illumi said was ever cruel or mean. It was always just true.

“Where am I going to sleep?”

“Here.” Illumi said nonchalantly.

“Yeah here, but where?” Hisoka sat up.

“Here.” Illumi pointed down at the bed.

“Where are you going to sleep?” Hisoka laughed.

“Here.” Illumi was starting to sound annoyed.

“The same bed?” Hisoka's jaw was stuck slightly a jar.

Illumi looked around the room, “Is that an issue?”

“Not for me, but you've said some things that would indicate that you would not want that.”

“If it's an issue I'll just get the air mattress.” Illumi stood.

“So you have an air mattress?”

Illumi rolled his eyes and made to leave the room.

“No.” Hisoka grabbed onto Illumi's hand, “It's fine. I'll shut up.”

“Thank God.” Illumi sighed.

Hisoka opened his mouth, but was shut up by a finger in his face.

“Don't you dare.” Illumi glared.

“You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.” Hisoka whispered, quick as a whip.

Illumi blinked at him, “I'm going to go get the air mattress.”

“No wait.” Hisoka sprang up and wrapped his arms around Illumi's waist and pulled him backwards.

Illumi retaliated with his elbow, but since he was off-balance, he misplaced his hit and clocked Hisoka in the face.

Hisoka cursed as he hit the edge of the bed and flopped onto the ground, but he wasted no time crawling toward Illumi's feet and yanking hard enough for Illumi to loose his footing completely and go crashing into the floor. The house shook with the force of the impact, sending a little figurine on one of Illumi's shelves toppling to the ground. Hisoka scrambled on top of Illumi, legs on either side of his waist, and attempted to grab a pillow to smother him with. Illumi grabbed Hisoka and wrenched him away from the bed. They wrestled like that for a couple more seconds, each one trying to regain the upper-hand.

The door slammed open, revealing Zeno slightly out of breath in the doorway. The position the two had landed in was Illumi with his legs wrapped around Hisoka's and his hands in the collar of his shirt, desperately trying to push him over, and Hisoka above him with a hand above his head and the other pushing on his neck.

Illumi, realizing that this was in fact a rather incriminating position, pushed Hisoka off him.

Zeno eyed the two before taking a slipper off and placing it between the door and the doorframe. “It stays open.” He said sternly before stalking away.

There was silence for a while, until the arguing downstairs started up again.

Hisoka began to laugh, “That was probably my fault.”

“All the problems in my life are your fault.” Illumi brought his elbow down onto Hisoka's stomach.

“All of them?” Hisoka coughed up.

“Yes.” Illumi stood and went to his bathroom which was on-suite from his bedroom.

“Look at it this way,” Hisoka called through the closed door. “You'd still have problems if I weren't here, but since I am you have someone charming to get through them with.”

“You're not charming.” Illumi opened the door slightly and stuck out his head.

“I'm charming enough to become your best friend in a matter of days.” Hisoka winked.

“You're not my best friend.”

“I'm your only friend.”

Illumi pursed his lips and shut the door again. A couple moments later, Hisoka heard the shower turn on, and did his best to devote all his attention to the small cracks running down the corners of Illumi's room.

Precisely 15 minutes later, the door opened and Illumi leaned against the door frame towel around his waist and chest exposed, “Are you going-”

Hisoka interrupted with a low whistle.

Illumi glared at him, eyes squinting slightly.

“Oh come on.” Hisoka scoffed, “Don't threaten me with the air mattress. You knew how I felt about you when you offered to let me sleep in your bed. I won't try anything I promise.” He held out his pinky finger.

Illumi walked over and linked his little finger with Hisoka's, “Are you going to take a shower?”

“Sure.” Hisoka jumped up and went to the bathroom.

As Hisoka poured soap into his hands, he couldn't help but wonder what it would smell like to bury his head into Illumi's shoulder, and he wondered what it would feel like to tangle his fingers into his long smooth hair. Would Illumi feel cold? Hisoka thought so. Maybe it was just the freezing water spilling over his shoulders, but there was something so cold about Illumi that it made it hard to imagine his body feeling like anything other than ice.

Hisoka leaned down and turned the heat down further, until his skin turned numb.

Chrollo was always so warm. It was nice to be warm, to be loved, but there was something enticing about utter cold enveloping you. Unfeeling ice being so close, close as anyone had ever gotten. Would the ice stay frozen, or would it leave him wading in frigid water? Hisoka hoped he would get the chance to find out.

He tried turning the heat up because the cold was not doing him any favors.

As lukewarm rivulets ran down his back, Hisoka washed the remaining suds from his hair. The mirror fogged at the edges, and condensation slicked the floor. There was a knock at the bathroom door, and Hisoka opened it a fraction to see Illumi holding a stack of folded clothes.

“Here.” He pushed the clothing through the door and shut it in Hisoka's face. “There's an extra toothbrush under the sink.”

It was pajamas.

Hisoka put on the pajamas and found the toothbrush. When he was done, he walked back out into the bedroom.

Illumi's eye twitched, “Please put on the shirt.”

“No. It's too hot.” Hisoka jumped onto the bed and crawled under the covers.

“It's winter.”

“Not in here.”

He was right. The air-conditioning fed straight into Illumi's room, making it suffocatingly hot in the winter and freezing in the summer. “Fine.” Illumi conceded and turned to click off the light.

“It's 10:30. Are you seriously going to sleep?” Hisoka was incredulous.

“We have to get up at six” Illumi said and threw the room into darkness.

“Six?” Hisoka rolled his eyes in faux horror. He often woke up at six himself, but he never went to bed early because of it.

“You're welcome to stay up, but I'm not. Goodnight.” Illumi turned his back to Hisoka and drifted to sleep.

“Goodnight.”

It was warm, warmer than it usually was. Probably because Hisoka's right arm was thrown over his stomach, and his nose was tucked against his side. Heat emanated from the exposed skin casted grey from the light filtering in through the blinds.

Illumi found himself thinking of the times when he would take Killua to the park. It was only two miles from their house, so they'd walk, regardless of weather, and ten year old Illumi would sit on the bench, with the parents, and watch Killua swing on the swings and slide down the slides. Only when the sun started to set would Illumi stand and collect his brother. Killua never played with the other kids, so there was little stopping him from skipping away hand in hand with Illumi. He'd beg, of course, to stay just a while longer, but any protests were quickly quieted as they reached the edge of the park and a wave of fatigue would fall over him. Two miles wasn't very far, but Illumi was still too small to carry his brother all that way, and still too kind to make him walk himself, so he'd call a cab using the rusted payphone. It cost $7, all of Illumi's allowance. He didn't mind. He didn't have anyone else to spend it on. Killua would cling to his arm in the back of the cab and drool a little circle onto Illumi's shirt. The cabs rarely had air conditioning, so the heat would become next to unbearable, but it was only two miles. He had enough reason to wait. When Killua turned 8, they stopped going. He was above the park, or at least he was above Illumi.

Illumi was roused from his day-dreaming by Hisoka's waking. He sat up, laying his weight onto the arm still on Illumi's chest, “Oh, sorry.” He rubbed the sleep from his eyes, “I drooled on you.”

“Yeah. It's fine.” The quiet, which had been empty a few seconds ago, felt awkward and heavy.

“I'm going to go brush my teeth.” Hisoka swung his legs over the side of the bed.

“Alright.” Illumi said. What he wanted to do was to pull Hisoka back on top of him, to be warm, and most of all, to be wanted.

The rest of the time in Illumi's room passed with minimal conversation. Only once they went downstairs did Illumi brighten. Maybe brighten wasn't the right word, but he did come alive.

He'd duck around his brothers as he navigated the kitchen, emptying the dishwasher, asking Hisoka if he wanted milk or sugar (The answer was yes to both, and iced if possible), and placing down four plates on the kitchen table. “Did you take your meds?” He asked Killua.

“I don't want to.” Killua groaned.

“Then talk to the therapist about it. Take them.”

Hisoka watched this interaction with hooded eyes.

“How'd you get them to take you off them?” Killua asked Illumi.

Illumi responded with a smack to the back of Killua's head. So like his mother.

Milluki stayed quiet as he shoved his bagel down his throat as quickly as possible.

“Eat it.” Illumi pointed at Hisoka, “We have to go soon.”

“Yes sir.” Hisoka got to eating his bagel, and when he was sure Illumi was looking away, he winked at Killua.

“Illumi. Your boyfriend's winking at me.” Killua whined.

Hisoka held his hands up by his head, “He's a fucking liar. You said it last night.”

“That was about Milluki.” Illumi's voice rose, “And he is not my boyfriend for the love of-”

Illumi stopped short as his mom descended the stairs, followed closely by Kalluto and Alluka.

“Good morning.” She smiled sweetly and began making coffee.

“We'll be going soon. Hisoka's going to drive us.” Illumi picked up the plates and deposited them in the dishwasher.

“I'm a great driver Kikyo. Don't worry.” Hisoka stood and picked up his chair before pushing it in to prevent scratching the floor.

Kikyo smiled, although Hisoka had no way of knowing if it reached her eyes. “I'm sure you are. Aren't you people supposed to be good at driving, or is it the opposite.”

“Ok Mom.” Illumi brushed off the last statement and kissed his mother's cheek, “We're going now. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye Kikyo!” Hisoka called over his shoulder as he was pushed out the door by Illumi.

Killua and Milluki crammed themselves into the back seat of the truck, and Illumi rode shotgun.

“Dad and Grandpa hate Hisoka.” Killua said as Hisoka turned out of the cul-da-sac.

“Yeah.” Illumi shrugged.

“But mom likes him.” Milluki clarified.

Both Hisoka and Illumi looked into the back seat. “Really?” Hisoka asked.

“Yeah. She said you're 'very charming'.” Milluki repeated his mother's words in a slight falsetto.

“Ha! See I told you.” Hisoka laughed and pointed at Illumi.

“What else did she say?” Illumi ignored Hisoka and stared intently at his brothers.

Killua snickered, but did not answer.

“Well...” Milluki began, “She said, and I can't say it verbatim, but” He put the falsetto on again, such a performer, “If Illumi's going to be gay, I'd prefer it to be with that boy. He seems very dedicated.”

Killua broke down into a fit of laughter.

“What did she say verbatim?” Illumi's voice was coated in hostility.

“I-I can't say it.” Milluki struggled to keep a straight face.

“She said the f slur.” Killua burst out and clamped a hand over his mouth.

“I guess I know where you get it from, Illumi.” Hisoka said quickly, no sign of joke in his tone.

The car went dead-silent. Barely anyone breathed. The only sound was the radio and the steady rush of road speeding underneath them. “Y no se dobla ni se rinde Así como tú, amor que das la vida” drifted from the speakers.

The silence went on for so long even Hisoka started to get unsettled. He enjoyed making people uncomfortable, but maybe this had been too far. What he said was true. It was just a fact, but it didn't just-

His spiraling was cut short by the sudden sound of laughter. It did not come from Milluki, Killua, nor Hisoka himself, but from Illumi. Full genuine laughter. Shrill and unnatural laughter, because evidently he did not do it often, but it was still honest laughter.

Hisoka got distracted by Illumi's smile and nearly ran off the side of the freeway, which sent Milluki into a fit of nervous cackling, and soon, Hisoka joined in.

The only one to stay quiet was Killua. Who, for the life of him, could not remember the last time he had seen his brother laugh, aside from a quiet polite giggle in formal situations. He had laughed before, hadn't he? Not in front of Killua, not in a long time.

Illumi's laughter cut off as he looked into the back seat and made eye-contact with Killua. His face dropped into quiet concern at the lack of Killua's excitement. He cocked his head in question.

Killua smiled a little and sunk as deep as he could into the small seat to appease his eldest brother.

Satisfied with this, Illumi turned back, laughing slightly at a joke Hisoka had made. It wasn't a particularly funny joke either. He never laughed at Killua's jokes, and Killua was downright hilarious in Killua's opinion. Did Illumi not love him? No. That was often the problem. He loved him so much it was suffocating, but maybe it was that Illumi did not like him.

“We're here.” Hisoka said, pulling up to the curb. Illumi got out to let his brothers escape the backseat and then got back in.

“I'll come with you to park the car.” He said as he watched his brothers make their way to class.

Hisoka just nodded, and drove off to student parking.

After they stopped, Illumi unzipped his bag and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. He offered one to Hisoka who shook his head.

“Can I?” Illumi asked and pushed in the built in cigarette lighter on the dashboard.

“You can smell the car. People smoke in here all the time.”

The lighter popped out and Illumi snubbed the cigarette into it, after a cursory glance to his palm. Smoke spewed out from his mouth, filling the car with the smell.

“You don't smell like smoke.” Hisoka commented. Smoke tended to get into the cracks of things, seep down into them, but Illumi just smelled like soap.

Illumi showed him the pack again, “I don't do it often. This is from three years ago.” There were only four cigarettes missing.

“Why now?” Hisoka asked. If someone only smokes once a year then there's usually a reason when they do.

Illumi blew out another puff of smoke. “I should get to class.” He ignored Hisoka's question

Hisoka rolled his eyes, “You should.”

“Yep,” Illumi put the cigarette out on the dashboard, “Thank you for driving us to school.”

“Thank you for letting me stay over,” Hisoka licked his thumb and tried to rub out the mark it had left.

“See you later.” Illumi jumped out of the car.

“After school today?”

“I can't. I have soccer.” Illumi leaned against the truck door, “On Thursdays as well, and on Friday's I have archery and knife throwing.”

“Archery and knife throwing? What are you, a prepper?” Hisoka laughed.

Illumi just shrugged, “We have actual play practice on Wednesdays, so Monday is the only day I'm free.”

“It's a date, but I'm not coming to dinner again if your mom's making the food.” Hisoka said it as a joke, but he was dead serious inside.

“She probably will if you keep me out to until 8 again.” Illumi shut the door in Hisoka's face.

Hisoka opened his own and ran around the back to walk to the buildings with Illumi, “Then I guess I'll have to take you to dinner.”

“I guess you will.” Illumi said and began walking faster. If it was an attempt to get Hisoka to leave him alone, it would not work. Nothing would.

So it became routine. Mondays after school, they would meet in the auditorium and go over potential blocking ideas or fix up the dialogue. Hisoka usually would have done this stuff with Chrollo, but he much preferred doing it with Illumi. After pressing, his critiques would be analytical and smart. His suggestions became easier to predict after Hisoka spent some time with him.

“If Kurapika exits from there just like I did last time-” Illumi would begin.

“It'll become repetitive and look like we're moving in a circle.” Hisoka would finish with a sigh, “But what if that's a thematic choice?”

“That's stupid, and we haven't been doing that, so we'd have to re-block the whole thing.”

“We have time.”

“I'm hungry.”

And then they'd go get dinner. Drive-through eaten in the tiny backseat of Hisoka's truck. There wasn't much reason to eat back there other than it was so small that the accidental brush of knees could be called a coincidence and didn't have to mean anything. They usually ate in silence, so that they could mull over what they'd discussed in the last two hours, or Illumi could do his homework. Then, Hisoka would drive him home. Hisoka learned the lyrics to the songs that played over the radio because radio stations usually play the same songs at the same time each week. A couple weeks later, and Illumi would hum the choruses under his breath. Hisoka found out that Illumi was tone deaf, which surprised him. It shouldn't have. Nobody's perfect all the time.

When they got back to Illumi's house, Hisoka would insist on coming inside. He would ask Kikyo about her day, and he learned how to read the wrinkles at the sides of her glasses and the red that rose in her cheeks to see which jokes landed and which were better left unsaid. Zeno and Silva were lost causes, but Hisoka would always nod and smile when they came into the room. The dog, which stalked next to Silva at all times, stopped growling at him, and eventually left Silva's side to nuzzle at Hisoka's leg. Nobody had to know about the jerky Hisoka had left in his pocket.

Even if Silva and Zeno didn't like him, they grew to accept his presence. The only one who stayed utterly anti-Hisoka, was Killua. It didn't bother Hisoka much. It's not like Killua played a big part in Hisoka's life other than the passing glare, and he had a tiny part in the play.

Everything was going so well.

“Hey why don't you guys go down to Ms. Krueger's classroom and practice your lines,” Leorio suggested to Killua and Gon. Kurapika and the three of them were cleaning up the ruff edges of Kurapika's plan.

“Why?” Gon asked.

“She stays late all the time, and she can help you with your delivery, Killua.”

“I don't need help.” Killua snapped, but stood up and got his stuff regardless.

“You're right Leorio.” Gon gathered his things and started pulling Killua from the classroom. “You have a lot of lines now. You need all the help you can get.” Gon said with a smile on his face as he wrapped an arm around his friend, oblivious to the rosy tint in his cheeks.

“Kurapika.” Leorio tried to pull Kurapika's attention away from the notebook he was furiously scribbling in.

“What.” He answered, not looking up.

“Is this a good idea?”

“It's the best idea I've ever had.” Kurapika took his feet off the library table and devoted his attention to Leorio.

“It's illegal. How have you convinced yourself this makes sense?” Leorio mumbled. He did think the plan was rather clever, but it could land Kurapika in a bad situation. If it went wrong, which it was likely to, he'd be put into jail until he died. Probation might be an option. Leorio certainly thought Kurapika was likable enough to get himself out of prison.

“You say tomato I say to-mah-to.”

Leorio sighed, “Have you been sleeping?” He put a finger to the bags growing under Kurapika's eyes.

“Not really,” Kurapika batted the hand away, “But it's fine. It's worth it. This benefits you too you know? If I get the tertiary lead, maybe I can go to college with you.”

That was unlikely. No matter how much Leorio loved Kurapika, it wouldn't raise his GPA or improve his SAT score. Leorio wan't concerned about that though, not like Kurapika was. Distance wasn't an issue for Leorio, so long as Kurapika talked to him, which was the opposite of what Kurapika was doing now. Silence for days on end as he planned to commit a serious crime because some asshole had gotten a part in a play he had convinced himself he needed.

“Yeah. I don't think that's why you're not going to get into the colleges I will.” Leorio rolled his eyes.

“What's that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing.”

“I promise you, it'll be ok.” Kurapika tried to brush off what Leorio had said, but it clung to him like the smell of wet. He grabbed Leorio's hand, “I want to stay with you more than anything, but this needs to happen first. I-I lo-”

“Whatever.” Leorio stood and pulled out his wallet. He slapped a couple bills on the table, “I have to go home. Get yourself an Uber or something.” He didn't want to hear it right now. He wanted to hear it from Kurapika, not whatever this revenge driven monster was.

“That's not your line,” Gon stopped Killua. They sat in Ms. Krueger's room while she graded papers at her desk.

“What do you mean that's not my line?” Killua looked at his script, “Oh. That's not my line. I got it now. You're throwing your life away.”

Gon stared at him and bit back giggles, “That's still not it.”

“You've got to be kidding me.” Killua groaned, “I can't do this. Kurapika's crazy if he thinks this is going to work.”

“I believe in you.” Gon smiled and patted his friend's shoulder.

“Yeah cause you're an idiot.” Killua looked away, “I'm beyond help.”

Gon looked pensively at his shoes, tapping a toe on the ground in thought.

“You're supposed to deny it.” Killua punched Gon lightly to get him out of his revery.

“You might be.” Gon said a little more brightly than he intended, making Killua sigh, “Beyond my help at least, but I'm sure Ms. Krueger can help you.”

Ms. Krueger looked up as if she had been listening in to their entire conversation, which she had been, “I'd be happy to teach you as long as I don't have to hear you stumble around your lines anymore.”

“See!” Gon jumped up, “I'll go to the auditorium, so you can focus.”

Killua grabbed Gon's hand and pulled him close to whisper in his ear, “Don't leave me here with this old wench. She's going to start talking about her divorce again.”

“I can hear you.” She scolded. If she wasn't going to talk about her divorce before, she sure was going to now.

“Please.” Killua begged.

“Sorry, but like you said. I can't help you.” Gon called back as he skipped off.

“That's not the middle.” Hisoka called up to the stage for the millionth time.

“I swear to you this is where I was last time.” Illumi's tone was slowly tensing as the hour wound on.

“And I swear to you it's not.” Hisoka huffed and crossed his arms.

“I drew a mark last time,” Illumi said, straightening a bit with his genius. Hisoka raised a brow. “I marked down exactly where I was standing the last time we did this, and I am standing on that mark.

Hisoka jumped up onto the stage to inspect the floor. There was indeed a mark that met up exactly at Illumi's toe. “That was there last time.”

“I know. I drew it there last time.” Illumi bent down to look Hisoka in the eyes.

“Fine.” Hisoka drew in a deep breath, “I was wrong. That was never the center.” He jumped away instinctively, as Illumi's fist jabbed out to hit him.

“Ok. We can be done with this now. I want to do the scene after we kill Kurt and Ram.”

“That's the one scene my brother's in,” Illumi noted, “Do you want me to get him? He's staying late with his friends?” He tensed at the last word.

“No.” Hisoka ran a hand through his hair, “I'd be too shy to do this scene with just us and him, but I don't want to waste time on Wednesday figuring out what I want to do.”

“Oh is this a waste of time to you?” Illumi jabbed, smile bleeding through his tone but not his expression.

“Yes.” For that Hisoka got a kick to the shin, “Goddammit you kick hard.” He then held out a finger and jumped off the stage and went into the back room. When he emerged, he was tugging the bench seat from an old car.

Instead of helping, Illumi just watched with a hand on his hip as Hisoka struggled to pull the seat up onto the stage.

After a minute of pushing and pulling, Hisoka got the seat on stage and placed it right where Illumi's little mark was. “See.” He pointed to it proudly.

“Carseat,” Illumi stated.

“Yes, and a prop.” Hisoka beamed down at what he thought was genius. “Impressive. No? I had to steal it from the junk yard. Don't worry I cleaned it.”

“I'd be impressed if you had more than one seat.” Illumi cocked his head as he inspected the prop. “Is this all we'll have on play night?”

“Yes.” Hisoka was loosing faith in his genius. “We'll have to rely on improve, but we'll get a laugh out of it. I'm sure.”

“That's what you say when you have a bad idea you can't justify.” Illumi was getting to know Hisoka too well for his liking. “Fine. The carseat is fine for now.”

Hisoka smiled and grabbed Illumi's hand, giving it a squeeze before continuing, “I think we run off here, go around the back as fast as possible, come out the other side, run across the front of the stage, I fake opening the door for you, and after you get in, I climb on top of you.” He sped up the last part of his sentence unintentionally.

Illumi just shrugged.

Hisoka pulled him off stage, and in the heat of the moment, started sprinting down the small strip of space behind the back curtain. During the play, it would not be safe to run back there. Also, the curtain would flutter in their wake, giving away their position, but for now, Hisoka went as fast as his legs could carry him with Illumi's hand firmly in his. Illumi kept pace and even broke in front while rounding the corner of the curtain.

Hisoka bowed as he mimicked opening the car door, and after Illumi crawled onto the seat and laid down on his back, Hisoka crawled in on top of him.

With his hands on either side of Illumi's head, Hisoka felt his heart beat in his chest. If not for the run behind the stage, he would've had to face the fact that Illumi's big dark eyes made him nervous. He had stared into a lot of eyes, and it had always been easy to get lost in them. That was not the case with Illumi. His eyes were so wide and dark that Hisoka was left staring at his own bright eyes reflected back at him.

Illumi's expression morphed from smiling into blank consideration. The reflection in his eyes began to waver as his eyes turned glassy. Hisoka desperately wanted to know what he was thinking and was about to ask when Illumi pulled his face so quickly to his own, a white flash crossed his vision. When the fog dissipated, the realization that Illumi had kissed him settled in.

Cold hands laced themselves into his hair and pulled at his neck. Illumi's eyes were tightly shut, so Hisoka could not see the astonishment in his own face. He moved a hand to grab the front of Illumi's white button down to pull him as close as he could. Pressed this tightly to each other, Hisoka began to taste the faint hint of smoke he couldn't before. His mouth was sweet and ashy, but mostly Hisoka just noticed the way his skin became warm underneath his touch.

Chapter Text

Gon closed his eyes as he walked, to prevent himself from looking down to his script. He made his way to the auditorium blind, moving on instinct. Most anyone else would have crashed into something or fallen down a flight of stairs, but Gon was very aware of his surroundings even without the use of his eyes.

When he opened them again, he found himself on the thin metal bridge over the stage where the lights were hung. He wasn't sure how he had gotten up there or how to get down. Gon was in the process of looking for the stairs when he heard people on the stage below him.

'Right.' He thought, 'Hisoka and Illumi stay after school on Monday's to practice their lines. Maybe they can help me find a way down.'

He peered over the railing, seeing what was definitely Hisoka but what couldn't of been Illumi. Illumi didn't like people getting near him, and Hisoka seemed to be getting really close to whoever this was. Too close for an unlocked auditorium.

Was it a girl? No boys at the school had long hair like that except Illumi, and it really couldn't have been him. Could it? Their hair was dark enough and their skin was pale enough, but the Illumi Killua had told him about would never in a million years kiss anyone in a place where someone could see.

The person underneath Hisoka used their legs and flipped him over, sitting on top of him, and for a moment during this maneuver their faces parted and Gon could make out who it was.

No. It couldn't have been. Gon's hand flew up to his mouth making a small noise which caused the person to look up at the railing. Fear thudded in Gon's chest, but the string of bright stage lights shielded him from Illumi's piercing gaze because oh my god it was Illumi.

Another hand moved, much slower this time, to his eyes. He had made his way up to the railing blind. He could get down the same way.

The door slammed open, revealing Gon standing with arms braced against the door frame and chest heaving. “I need to tell you something,” Gon rasped.

“What?” Killua stood and rushed towards the door.

“We'll go to the library first.” Gon looked to Ms. Krueger, “Did he get any better?”

“Anything would be better than before.” She sighed. The truth was he had improved quite a lot, but she was not the type to congratulate anything other than the best.

“Great!” Gon snatched Killua's hand and went tearing down towards the library.

Killua pumped his arms in unison with Gon for a while before he was distracted by the buzz of his phone. “Hold on.” He called out to Gon who had ran several feet away before realizing that Killua was not following, “Leorio says he's gone home, and that I need to get a ride with my brother and Hisoka.”

Gon looked at him with big concerned eyes.

“What?” Killua looked up, his own concern growing over his face.

“I'll tell you in the library.” Gon said before turning and sprinting as fast as possible.

When the two boys threw open the door to library, Kurapika was sitting at the table, face hidden within a notebook. He did his best to wipe his eyes before looking up to them.

“Is everything ok?” Kurapika asked the hunched figure of Gon in the door way.

He was out of breath and couldn't mange speaking yet, so Killua answered for him, “Gon has something to tell us.”

Gon took in one final shaking breath and squeezed out, “I left Killua in Ms. Krueger's room to practice lines and went to the auditorium. I have trouble reading my lines with my eyes open because I always find myself staring at my script. I just don't have very good self-control, so I close my eyes. Don't worry I rarely hit anything, but once I nearly fell off the stairs, but Killua was there and he caught me.”

“Gon.” Kurapika butt in, “Your point?”

“Right,” Gon sighed again, “I went to the auditorium and you'll never guess who I saw.”

“Was it Illumi and Hisoka?” Killua asked.

“Yeah! How'd you know?” Gon looked slightly disappointed.

“They stay after school on Mondays for the play. I meant to remind you, but you left me with Ms. Krueger before I could.”

“So you don't know?” Gon questioned.

“Know what?” Killua was getting exasperated. He didn't like the uncertainty surrounding his brother and Hisoka's budding friendship or whatever he was going to call it.

“What they were doing.” Gon stared Killua down until Killua felt butterflies appear in his stomach.

“Reading lines?” Killua ventured.

“No. They were not speaking. They didn't leave a lot of room for speaking.”

“What do you mean?” Kurapika put a hand on Gon's.

Gon took in one last deep breath, and after a sorrowful look at Killua, spat out what he had to say, “Illumi was making out with Hisoka on the floor of the auditorium.”

Kurapika raised an eyebrow and Killua just looked blank. Then, he began to giggle.

“What?” He said through a laugh. “No he wasn't.”

“Yes he was. I saw.” Gon pulled down at his eye, revealing soft pink tissue.

“No. You're lying,” Killua said with a smile, “Or you miss-saw.”

“That's what I thought at first, but I saw his face. For a second. They were really...” Gon pressed his palms together.

Killua shook his head, smile still on his face, and pulled out his phone. His expression faded into a sick sort of panic. “Oh my God. You're not lying. You never lie.” He groaned, “Illumi just texted me to tell him when I'm ready to leave, so Hisoka” His voice broke at the name, “Can drive me home.”

“I'm sorry.” Gon put a hand on his friend's shoulder like there had just been a death in the family. Although, if you had asked Killua, he would've said this was worse.

Kurapika was focused on his shoes, “But what about-” A smile spread across his face, “I have an idea.”

Gon cocked his head, while Killua just stared at the ground as if he had just stepped off the lobotomobile.

“You know how neither of us know our blocking?” Kurapika asked Killua.

“So?” Killua snapped.

“Hisoka knows the blocking.” Kurapika was smiling now.

“Why would he tell us the blocking?” Gon's brow furrowed as he attempted to understand, “We can't tell anyone about the plan.”

“Because it'll get out of hand, and we'll get in trouble.” Kurapika finished Gon's thought, “But if we have something to shut him up with...”

“Why would Hisoka care about who knows who he's kissing? He's never tried to keep it a secret before. Remember at the party with...” Gon trailed off, “Oh.” He said finally, “Chrollo.”

“Chrollo.” Kurapika echoed.

Killua stood outside the front doors of the school, waiting for Hisoka and Illumi to pick him up. He was not looking forward to the ride home because every ride with Hisoka was nightmarish, and knowing that he had just made out with his brother on the floor of the auditorium made it so much worse. All he wanted to do was yell at the two of them, but Kurapika had told him to keep quiet.

The truck rolled up to the curb and Illumi hopped out to putdown his seat so Killua could get in. Once they were all in the car, Illumi spoke, “So you hate lesbians?”

“I don't-” Hisoka fell into a fit of laughter, “hate lesbians. Please Illumi.”

“It sounds like you hate lesbians,” Illumi mumbled under his breath, “I'm going to tell...What's her name?”

“Machi, and please don't I have already had this conversation with her.”

Killua watched this interaction with a grimace on his face. He did not like that they were speaking in an overall friendly and joking manner, and he liked even less that he didn't know what any of it meant.

“What conclusion did you come to?” Illumi asked.

“Agree to disagree.” Hisoka sighed.

“That's just delaying the argument. Now that she has me on her side, you don't stand a chance.”

“The last thing I want is both of you yelling at me.” Hisoka took a moment to think about it, “Actually, that doesn't sound half-bad.”

Illumi didn't answer. He just smiled a little out the window.

“Were you sitting back here?” Killua asked. He didn't like not being included.

“No.” Illumi said a little quickly, “Why?”

“The seat's warm is all.” Killua shrugged.

“For a second.” Hisoka tried to rectify the lie.

They sat in silence. It was comfortable for Hisoka and Illumi, but for Killua, it felt like the backseat was his own personal hell where he was forced to analyze every interaction between his brother and supposed boyfriend.

“Does the CD player work?” Illumi asked, peering at the console.

“Yeah, but I don't think the radio would turn off. The knob's broken, and besides I don't have any CDs.” Hisoka answered.

“It's fine. I have some, and I can fix the knob. My dad taught me how.” Illumi settled back into his seat.

“Did he teach all of his sons that?” Hisoka opened the conversation to Killua.

“Yeah.” Killua grumbled.

“He thought it would make us better men.” Illumi added.

Hisoka laughed at that, trailing a limp wristed hand down Illumi's shoulder. It sent a cascade of rather unkind thoughts through Killua's head.

“He's not kidding.” Killua clarified, “That's what he told us.”

“Oh.” Hisoka grimaced and devoted his attention back to the road.

“Did your father not teach you how to fix things?” Illumi wondered.

“No.” Hisoka sighed, “He's dead, and my step-father beat me, and he's dead too so...”

Silence. The unique silence that only followed Hisoka.

Illumi found it rather charming.

“I need to talk to you.” Kurapika grabbed Hisoka's arm and dragged him down the hallway.

“Getting a little handsy today Kurapika.” Hisoka drawled, “Get something you want to tell me.”

“Yep.” Kurapika flung the door to the library open. It had become their official meeting spot at
this point, “Sit.” He threw Hisoka at the table.

“What's this about?” Hisoka eyed Gon and Killua who were standing at either side of Kurapika like bodyguards.

“He saw you putting your hands and mouth all over my brother.” Killua spoke up, pointing a finger to Gon.

“Right to the point? Shame I'm a fan of idle chit chat.”

Killua was incredulous, “You- You-”

“Come on Killua. Say it.” Hisoka said nonchalantly. In reality, he could feel his heart sinking to his stomach. Illumi would kill him if anyone found out, and he really wanted to stay alive for just a little longer.

Kurapika waved them off, “If you don't do what I tell you, I'll tell Chrollo you're cheating on him.”

Hisoka laughed outright to this, “I'd have to be dating Chrollo for that.”

“But the party.” Gon insisted, “Kurapika saw you two.”

“Um...” Hisoka looked at them quizzically, “We're not together. Sometimes he makes out with me at parties, and he gives me blowjobs for parts he wants in the movies I make, but that's it.” He turned to Killua, “Even that's over now.”

Gon and Killua seemed pleased, if a little disgusted with this answer, but Kurapika was seeing red. “What did you just say?” He said with eerie calmness.

Hisoka ran back over what he had just said in his head. Realization dawned on his face, bringing with it a look of despair, “No Kurapika. You're-”

“Blowjobs for parts in your plays?” Kurapika was smiling now. An empty smile.

“Sometimes.” Hisoka shrugged.

“So when you said 'two blowjobs' for me to play Chandler...” He allowed time for Hisoka to fill in the rest.

“You were tied. He simply tipped the scales.”

“Tipped the-” Kurapika cut himself off and took a deep breath, “You didn't even want him in the part, and I still didn't get it.”

“That's not true.” Hisoka shook his head, “I simply couldn't decide.”

“I want the part.” Kurapika stated.

“It's a little late for that.” Hisoka sighed and stood, “I'll be leaving now.”

“No.” Kurapika grabbed his hand, “I know all the lines. All I need is the blocking.”

“Chrollo's not going to give you the part, and I can't take it from him.” Hisoka stood shoulder to shoulder with Kurapika.

“I have a plan. All I need is the blocking.” Kurapika repeated, “You didn't want him. You would've chosen me.”

“What about McNamara?” The idea was growing on him. He was curious about this plan.

Kurapika pointed to Killua, who gave a wave.

“You've got to be kidding me.” Hisoka rolled his eyes, “Fine, but no one else hears about what happened in the auditorium, especially not Illumi.”

“Fine.” Kurapika let go of Hisoka's hand.

“Well it was wonderful speaking to you all. I'll meet you after school on Thursday to go over blocking.” Hisoka was smiling as he left the room.

Hisoka sat in the backroom of the auditorium. He had a blinding headache because he hadn't been sleeping with all the preparations for the play and Kurapika's plan. It would be a lie though to say he didn't like the dull thud behind his eyes. It meant he had something to do, that he wasn't bored.

The door to the office opened. Illumi stood in the doorway, “I brought those CDs.”

“Great.” The ache in his head faded as Illumi dropped the plastic bag of CDs on the desk.

Hisoka pulled out three of the loose CDs and read the titles aloud, “The Stranger, Electra Heart, and [++]. That's some diverse taste.”

“Thank you.” Illumi plucked Electra Heart out of Hisoka's hand and sat down on his knee, “Which song on here is your favorite?”

After getting over his initial reaction to Illumi casually sitting on his lap, Hisoka answered, “Bubblegum Bitch.”

“Thought so.”

“What's that supposed to mean?” Hisoka snatched the album back and put them all in the bag.

“Nothing. Mine's Teen Idle.”

“That's the fourth best song on there.”

Illumi stared at him, “Let me guess, you like Primadonna better?”

“Yes because it is better.” Hisoka laughed.

“You have basic taste.” Illumi sighed.

“Like you didn't just say Teen Idle!” Hisoka was aghast.

“Teen Idle is popular for a reason.”

“And Bubblegum Bitch and Primadonna aren't?”

“Teen Idle is a lyrical masterpiece. The title in itself is-”

Hisoka cupped his face and pulled him into a kiss. He didn't really feel like hearing Illumi's in depth analysis of MARINA songs. Although, they were probably very insightful.

There was a knock, and Illumi shot up as Chrollo opened the door. Illumi looked down, realizing he was still standing between Hisoka's legs, “I'm going to go fix the radio.” Illumi said hastily as he stepped out from behind the desk. He pulled a wrench out of his pants as proof.

“And here I thought you were just happy to see me.” Hisoka pulled out his keys and tossed them to a glaring Illumi.

“Hello Chrollo.” Illumi said as he brushed past him and out of the room.

“Hello.” Chrollo gave him a nod.

Once the door closed behind Illumi, Hisoka spoke, “What do you want?”

Chrollo pulled up a chair and sat at the other side of the desk, “Are you dating?”

Hisoka shrugged. He couldn't tell anyone, but what was the harm in making Chrollo a little jealous.

“I was just wondering about my blocking. We haven't been doing it, and I don't know it really well.”

“Yes.” Hisoka wasn't sure how to address this. It would have been a problem if Chrollo was actually playing Chandler, but he wasn't, and it was too much work to teach him the blocking for scenes he wasn't going to be in.

“Why aren't we doing the blocking?” Chrollo asked flat-out.

“You're better than them Chrollo. That's the short truth. The fact is I didn't really think about you needing the practice. You've always been so perfect the first time, but you're right. Next practice we'll go over your scenes. Ok?”

“Ok. Thanks.” Chrollo stood, and walked to the door.

“Hey.” Hisoka called. He picked up the Electra Heart album and showed it to Chrollo, “What's the best song on here?”

“Music's objective. There's no real best song. Besides, I don't like Marina and the Diamonds.” Chrollo shrugged, and left the room.

“Right.” Hisoka whispered to himself.

Killua had grown to expect that when he got into a car with Hisoka and Illumi, he would be interrupting an argument.

“Primadonna has better build up. Teen idle sacrifices sound for lyrics.” Hisoka was border line yelling.

“Plenty of songs have good musical sound, including Teen Idle, and Primadonna isn't anything special in that regard.” Illumi responded cooly. “Have you heard Hi High?” He pulled out a CD. “That's build up.”

“No. I don't really like Kpop.” Hisoka shrugged.

“But look at you.” Illumi gestured to Hisoka's general appearance, completely serious.

“Excuse me?”

Illumi shot a look to Killua in the back seat, and then raised an eyebrow, “I think you know what I'm getting at.”

Hisoka laughed, “You are on thin ice.”

The rest of the card ride was spent ignoring Killua and discussing other albums. They both agreed that Scenes From an Italian Restaurant was the best song on The Stranger, but their second and third songs varied. Killua thought the clear first choice was Movin' Out, but he was't about to butt-in.

“What was your third favorite on Electra Heart? You said Teen Idle was 4th.” Illumi asked as they pulled up to the Zoldyck house.

“Homewrecker.” Hisoka turned off the car and leaned back on his head-rest.

Illumi scoffed, but made no further comment.

“Hey, Killua?” Hisoka asked.

“What?” Killua snapped.

“Will you go inside and tell your mom that I'm sorry I can't come in, but I have to go to Kurapika's house? Also tell her I'm sure she looks lovely because she always does.”

“No.” Killua grumbled and hopped out of the car after Illumi.

“It's ok. I'll do it.” Illumi smiled.

“Wait,” Hisoka stopped him, “Can you stay for a second. I want to ask you something.”

“Sure.” Illumi stepped back into the car and closed the door.

Hisoka waited until Killua was inside before pulling Illumi towards him and kissing him on the cheek.

“Is that it?” Illumi asked, reaching for the door handle.

“I love you.” Hisoka said assuringly, lacing their fingers together and rubbing Illumi's hand with his thumb.

“It's been a week.” Illumi condescended.

“Not for me.” Hisoka gave Illumi's hand one last squeeze before letting it go. “Do you love me?”

Illumi searched for the words, but came up empty. There were only three, even one could be enough, but his eyes were stinging, and he couldn't find them. “I think you know.” was all he could manage. He hoped Hisoka knew enough for the both of them. “I'll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye.” Hisoka called out before driving away, leaving Illumi feeling empty on the curb.

He wiped the tear stains from his cheeks, cursing them for ever being there, and walked into his house.

“Mother.” Illumi called into the living room.

“Yes?” Kikyo answered, “Where's Hisoka?”

“He had to go to Kurapika's house. He said to tell you that he's sorry and that he's sure you look lovely because you always do.”

She smiled to herself, “Such a good boy.”

“I have homework, but I'll start on dinner soon.” Illumi went up to his room and threw himself onto his bed.

A pit was slowly growing in his stomach. He didn't do homework, he just stared at the ceiling and tried to drown out the panic raging in his head.

For a long while, he had thought he knew what love meant. He loved his family, he loved Killua, and that was it. But now he was filled with uncertainty. Hisoka wasn't like Killua, but he still enjoyed his company, and that had led to him thinking about Killua and then Milluki. That was different too. Milluki knew the most about Illumi's life out of anyone in the world, but he was also the one at the end of most of Illumi's snide comments. Not just because he was an easy target, but because he didn't trust anyone else. Kalluto and Alluka were too young, although Kalluto was getting older surprisingly quick, and Killua didn't know him well enough to know when he was kidding. Hisoka didn't know a lot about him either, they had only been friends for about a month, yet he knew exactly when Illumi meant what he said and when he didn't. The pit grew, and it seemed to swallow up everything but the whirlwind in his mind. He thought he might throw up.

There was a knock at the door.

“Come in.” Illumi sat up.

Zeno opened the door, “Dinner?”

Illumi looked to the clock on his nightstand. It was later than he thought it would be, “Yeah.” He got up and slipped past Zeno into the hallway.

“Do you trust Hisoka?” Zeno asked without turning to face him.

“Yes.” Illumi said quicker than he probably should of for someone like Hisoka.

“Well I guess that's enough.” Zeno sighed and walked down the stairs, leaving Illumi reeling in his answer.

'Yes.' He thought, 'That was probably enough for now.'

Illumi had made ginger scallion tofu for dinner that night, and they sat at the table eating it in silence. Most of the time, Illumi started conversation, but tonight his mind remained on other things.

“So no soccer today?” Zeno asked Illumi.

He shook his head.

“Hm.”

“Hey mom?” Killua spoke-up through the silence.

“Yes?”

“Can I spend the weekend at Gon's house?” Killua put on his best smile.

“I don't know.” Kikyo sighed and turned to Silva.

“I got a note from Mr. Kite that you got a 75 on one of his quizzes.” Silva answered.

“There were only four questions. I got one wrong, and it doesn't even count towards my grade.” Killua pleaded.

“You spend entirely too much of your time with Gon.” Illumi said without thinking.

Killua scoffed, “You spent all of last weekend with Hisoka. How is this any different?”

'I don't matter as much as you.' flashed through Illumi's head. “I'm a senior. I don't have to worry about my grades so much anymore, and I've also never gotten below a 95% on any quiz in my life.” Is what he said aloud. “Besides, I spend time with Hisoka because I'm helping him with the play, not for fun.”

“Really because it sounded like you were having a lot of fun in the auditorium last Monday.” Killua sniped.

Illumi got very quiet and let the conversation move away from them before speaking, “What do you mean?”

Regret painted Killua's face a hot red, “I just mean I know, so maybe don't lie.”

Illumi shoved his seat out and stood up abruptly, “I have to go to my room, and do stuff for soccer because we didn't have practice today.” He left his plate on the table and walked up to his bathroom where he promptly threw-up his dinner.

Illumi had asked Hisoka to take him home from archery after avoiding him all morning. Hisoka didn't put much thought into it. Illumi could be cold, and it didn't really bother him as long as they got to be together at the end of the day.

The line of archers consisted of a woman with bright pink streaks decorating her long grey braid, her friend with short white hair, a disheveled looking man shooting at a paper plate, and finally Illumi with his hair pulled back in a ponytail, arrows decorating the torn-out yellow middle of the target.

“Hey!” Hisoka called out, causing Illumi to hitch and hit the blue.

He whipped around. “You made me miss,” he snapped.

“You hit the target?” Hisoka sat on the bench under the list of rules.

“In the blue.” Illumi seethed as he knocked another arrow. He did not, however, draw.

“Clear?” One of the woman called from down the line.

“Clear.” Illumi responded, but he didn't go to get his arrows. All he did was slip the arrow out of the knock until everyone was back behind the line. “Killua said something yesterday I wanted to ask you about.”

“Yeah?” Hisoka asked, concern growing in the pit of his stomach at the arrow sitting on the string.

“Did you tell him we were dating?” Illumi asked, running a delicate finger along the plastic fletching.

“No. Were?” Hisoka's expression faltered, but Illumi didn't notice. He wasn't looking at him.

“Oh.” Illumi stayed quiet for a moment, “Because yesterday he said he knew, and I haven't told anyone, which just leaves...”

“Gon.” Hisoka sighed.

“Gon?” Illumi's tone cracked.

“He saw us in the auditorium, and he told Killua.” Hisoka thought it better to be honest, “And Kurapika.”

“And you didn't think to tell me?” Illumi looked up now, eyes wide and fighting to remain empty.

“I didn't want to worry you.”

“Clear?” The other woman.

“Clear.” Illumi snapped, “Do you know how much trouble I could get in if my parents find out?”

“Your mom likes me. I didn't think it would be a problem.” Hisoka felt panic closing in his throat for the first time in a while.

“You are an idiot. Just because my mom likes you now doesn't mean she will tomorrow. My father, grandfather, and all my siblings hate you, and now I understand why. I live in a constant state of uncertainty, and yesterday was the first time I thought I knew anything.” Illumi's breath was going ragged, “I trusted you, and I am the idiot.” He shook his head and looked to the ground and, therefore, Hisoka's foot.

Hisoka stood, “I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, but I didn't want you to get mad. It's not my fault.”

“Well it ended with me being pretty mad huh?”

Illumi pulled the bow to half draw and let it go. With a twang, the arrow snapped off the string and through the middle of Hisoka's foot. The whole lineup heard the ting of the tip of the arrow hitting concrete.

It took a moment for the pain to set in, but when it did Hisoka let out a choking half-scream.

“You should go to a hospital before you stain the cement.” Illumi said, face and tone back to their usual void of expression, “Return the arrow to my father's office on Monday. They're expensive.”

Chapter Text

A week passed, leaving Hisoka's foot in a state of perpetual pain. The play was on tonight, and Illumi had stopped showing up to practice. Any change in blocking had to go through Killua and then to Illumi.

Chrollo was walking next to Hisoka, talking about something. What? Hisoka wasn't sure. His whole head felt like it was submerged in grain, and his eyes felt like they might pop out of his head if he breathed too hard.

“I think if you and I go down to the auditorium at lunch, I'll be able to get it.” Chrollo finished.

“Huh?” Hisoka stopped and faced Chrollo.

“My blocking? I need to practice.” Chrollo surmised.

“Why didn't you just say that?” Hisoka snapped. It came off harsher than he had meant it to.

“Sorry, so we'll go at lunch like we used to?”

“No.” Hisoka sighed, and walked away to find Kurapika, leaving Chrollo alone in the hallway.

The library was filled with the thudding of running feet as Killua and Gon raced around the outer edge while waiting for Hisoka to come and find them.

When Gon noticed Hisoka in the doorway, he sprinted toward him at full speed. He was going too fast to stop, so he crashed into Hisoka's side. “Do you think I'm going to do good. I've never been in a play before.” He said, gripping onto Hisoka's sleeve as he jumped up and down.

“You are going to do wonderfully.” Hisoka gave a big smile to Gon. He was a good kid, nice, and hopeful, but most importantly dedicated.

“You mean that?” Gon chirped.

“Of course I do.” Hisoka ruffled Gon's hair and he leaped back to Killua. “I want to know what you're planning on doing to Chrollo.” He turned his attention to Kurapika.

“I don't know if we should tell you...” Kurapika looked to Gon and Killua, “You're friends right?”

“When it benefits me, and now it doesn't.”

“You're sure?”

“I'd like to see Chrollo puke his guts.”

Kurapika fished in his bag, throwing out loose papers and finally pulling out a heavy jug of windex, “Good because that is exactly what I hope will happen.”

Hisoka faltered for a moment. He looked to Gon and Killua who looked pleased with Kurapika's resourcefulness. “Oh. You're insane.”

“Trust me. I've calculated how much you have to drink for it to kill you, and I won't put that much in. In fact, I gave myself the dose last night and I'm fine. It takes you out for a couple hours, but you get back on your feet pretty quick.” Kurapika assured him.

“I didn't say I had a problem with it. In fact, I think it's rather poetic.” Hisoka thought this was rather imaginative way to dispose of someone playing Chandler.

“I know.” Kurapika put the bottle back in his bag, “What happened to your foot?”

“Oh.” Hisoka kicked up his foot which is clad in a giant shoe he found at goodwill and stuffed with bandages, “I was shot.”

Kurapika and Gon both gave him questionary glances, but Killua looked vaguely guilty.

“Illumi shot me with an arrow.” Hisoka clarified.

“Why?” Gon asked.

“Well,” Hisoka stared at Killua, “I don't know who, but someone told him that you guys knew we were together, and he wasn't all to pleased that I didn't tell him.”

“So you aren't together anymore?” Kurapika's voice was tinged with concern, not for Hisoka but more for himself.

“Don't worry Sunshine. It still works as blackmail, and I really want to see how this goes.”

Kurapika sighed, “I told you not to call me that.”

“Sorry babe.” Hisoka smiled, “How are we going to get Chrollo to drink it?”

“It takes about half an hour to kick in, so I think you should meet with him before the play and slip it to him in this.” Kurapika pulled out a water bottle, “I'll prepare it and give it to you right after school.”

“Why not put it in before school?” Hisoka cocked his hip and placed a hand on it.

“The bottle starts to disintegrate a little.” Kurapika said with much too much casualty, “It's safe enough. I promise.”

“Kurapika never breaks a promise.” Gon smiled brightly at his friend.

“If Gon says it it must be true.” Hisoka threw him a smile, “Ok, after school I'll give it to him.” He turned to leave.

“Make sure he drinks the whole thing, or he might die.” Kurapika called out as an after-thought.

Chrollo tapped his foot against the grimy tiles of the barely used conference room. Stacks of disused chairs and tables framed the perimeter, boxing in the already small space. It seemed to have remained unused and likely unentered for the past ten years. He wasn't sure why Hisoka asked him to meet here, but he couldn't help the uptick of his heartbeat at the prospects.

“Hey.” Hisoka singsonged as he stuck his head through the doorway, “Hope I didn't make you wait too long.”

“You didn't.” Chrollo had spent a half-hour waiting in the musty room, and he could feel the strain the dust was leaving on his lungs.

If you had asked Chrollo why he liked Hisoka as much as he did, he'd probably just shrug. In truth, he had never really considered it. Any normal person would spend a considerable amount of time dissecting what exactly made their standards dip to Hisoka's level, God knows Illumi did, but not Chrollo. It was probably just habit. You know someone long enough it becomes routine to think about them, and when those thoughts become stale you have to make something else up. For most, this meant a fake sort of attraction. Chrollo, however, absorbed everything he knew from other people, and he had learned that when someone loved someone else, loving them back made that person happy. Hisoka had loved him so much, it was impossible for Chrollo not to get sucked up into it. Even when Hisoka's whirlwind began it's quiet decline, Chrollo got caught in the remaining updrafts. It also helped that Hisoka wasn't the most loyal, which fed into his Christ complex. He liked thinking of Hisoka as a modern day Judas.

“Good.” Hisoka beamed and pulled out two water bottles, one with the logo ripped off and one that looked slightly blue in the tired light. “Here. Drink this.” He handed Chrollo the bottle with the logo still on. “All of it. You need to stay hydrated.”

“No. It's ok. I have a water bottle.” Chrollo pulled out a bright blue canteen.

“I put electrolytes in it. Trust me.”

“Fine.” Chrollo snatched the bottle and took off the cap, taking a tentative sip. “It tastes kind of mediciney.”

“That's how it's supposed to taste. Mine does too.” Hisoka reassured him.

“Then can I try some of yours?” Chrollo reached out. He had had electrolyte water before and this was not what it tasted like.

“No. Greedy bastard.” Hisoka gave him his winning smile and put the water bottle away.

Chrollo put the bottle down, “This is about the blocking right? I'm sorry about not knowing it, but I think all I need is a quick refresher.”

“Drink it.” Hisoka disregarded Chrollo's statement.

“It tastes kind of gross Hisoka.”

“Don't you trust me?” Hisoka feigned hurt, “We won't start until you've finished it.”

Chrollo looked skeptically from Hisoka to the bottle. “Alright,” He said with a sigh and began to chug. If he had to drink this, he'd get it over with as quick as possible. “Are you sure those were electrolytes?”

“Yep.” Hisoka pulled out his script which was covered in notes scrawled out in two people's handwriting. “What are you confused on.”

Chrollo felt a little like screaming. They had gone over all his scenes maybe twice, and Illumi hadn't even been there for the last week. “All of it.” He said as calmly as he could manage.

“Jeez you really need to start paying attention. Ok we'll start at the beginning.”

Chrollo sighed, “This is the last play we'll do together. I wish we could've practiced after school like we used to.”

“Come on. That's not true.” Hisoka cupped Chrollo's face in his hands, still pinching the script between his pointer and middle finger, “You're my muse. This is just the last in this dead-end school.”

“Is that Illumi's handwriting,” Chrollo's brown eyes flitted to the paper against his cheek.

“Yeah,” Hisoka sighed, taking his hands back to inspect the notes, “He has surprisingly messy handwriting. You'd think it'd be perfect.”

“I don't think I'm your muse anymore.” Chrollo let out a hiss of a breath, “Let's just go from the top.”

“Ok!” Hisoka flipped to the beginning.

They spent 40 minutes reviewing the blocking. Hisoka almost felt bad for Chrollo, who was slowly losing the color in his already wan face.

“I'm sorry.” Chrollo bent over and put his hands on his knees, “I feel really sick. I don't know if- Uh oh.” He scrambled to the trashcan and threw-up half into it half on the floor.

“Oh my god.” Hisoka rushed to his side and pulled back the hair from his face, “We should get you to the nurse.”

“No.” Chrollo said shakily as he straightened up, “It's just nerves. I'll be fine. We should head to the auditorium anyways.”

“If you say so.” Hisoka put a hand on his back and led Chrollo down the halls.

“Hey.” Machi jogged up to them. She was there helping with the costumes. “Oh my God. You look like shit.”

“I'm fine.” Chrollo reassured her with a smile before his face went blank and he rushed to the nearest trashcan.

“What did you do?” Machi turned her attention away from Chrollo puking up his guts and towards Hisoka.

“What?” Hisoka was mesmerized by the painting of Chrollo hunched over a tiny bin in front of him, “Nothing.”

“Sure.” Machi waved Shizuku over, who was there for moral support, and whispered something to her. Shizuku nodded, and with her newly gifted task, skipped off to guide Chrollo to a bathroom.

“Now we don't have a star.” Hisoka shook his head, “What ever will we do?”

“Shut up.” Machi scoffed as she walked away to prepare the rest of the costumes. She had gotten measurements for Heath Chandler that were decidedly not Chrollo's, but were surprisingly the exact same as one Kurapika Kurta. The measurements for McNamara had also been much smaller than expected.

“Hey!” Leorio walked up to Hisoka, “Have you seen Kurapika?”

“No. Sorry.” Hisoka shook his head.

“Damn.” Leorio looked around him, eyes scanning presumably for Kurapika, “Oh my God. Did you do that to Chrollo?”

Hisoka's mouth turned up at the ends, “I need to get my makeup done, and make some changes to Kurapika's and Killua's. If you'll excuse me.”

“You're excused. I'm going to go give Chrollo some activated charcoal.” Leorio muttered.

“I didn't think you liked Chrollo. That's rather sweet.” Hisoka placed a hand over his heart.

“I figured there was no way to stop Kurapika from doing this. I can, however, make sure he doesn't go to jail for murder.”

“You're very thoughtful.” Hisoka patted Leorio on the back and walked away to find Pakunoda who had offered to help with makeup.

He found her and Nobunaga putting makeup on Kurapika and Illumi respectively. Pakunoda was sure handed, but Nobunaga's messily dabbed on splotches of color left something to be desired. 'Thank God.' Hisoka thought.

“There's been a change of plans.” Hisoka whispered into Pakunoda's ear, “Chrollo is a little out of it. You know pre-show jitters. Kurapika's going to-”

“I know.” She pointed to the red powder at the edges of Kurapika's eyes, “Machi warned me about a week ago.”

“Course she did.” Hisoka smiled and turned around to Nobunaga, “I think someone needed you over there for...” Hisoka searched for the right word.

“Good. You do this.” Nobunaga stood abruptly and shoved the brush into Hisoka's hand. Clearly he was self-aware.

Illumi blinked up at him. There was no sign of animosity in his eyes, just empty detachment. With only a cursory glance, Hisoka did not see the whites of his knuckles as Illumi buried his nails into his elbow. Five pink curves marked his skin when he pulled his hand away to instead pick at the wood splintering off the chair he was on.

Hisoka sat, giving him a bright smile, and began working on removing the mess Nobunaga had scrawled on Illumi's near perfect face.

'Near perfect' Hisoka thought as his finger slid over the bumps on his cheeks and nose. He applied a dusty shade of pink to his mouth, pointer finger parallel to his jaw and middle tucked snug underneath it. While he wiped the excess off with his thumb, Hisoka noticed the way the skin puckered at the inner curve of his lip.

Hisoka cupped Illumi's face, staring into his endless eyes. Illumi, eventually, flinched away from the touch, breaking the eye-contact.

He wasn't sure what possessed him to do it, all Hisoka knew was that his fingers were suddenly tangled in a chunk of Illumi's hair. He tugged, hard. Hard enough that Illumi's head almost slammed against the table.

Illumi shot up, and punched Hisoka in the cheek. He was wearing rings, blue ones that Hisoka had found around in various thrift shops specifically for the role. He had spent a sizable amount of money getting them to fit Illumi perfectly.

“Am I done?” Illumi asked. His voice was unfeeling.

“Yeah.” Hisoka rasped, sounding like he had been or was about to cry.

Illumi turned without another word.

The other cast members, slowly turned their attention away from Hisoka and back to whatever they had previously been occupied with. Hisoka thumbed the blood beading on his cheek. At least it was in character. He stood to go find Machi for his costume.

The curtains slid open, revealing Gon, Illumi, Killua, and Kurapika. Illumi towered over them, and it made him being the only girl seem a little unrealistic. The pants and the fact that Hisoka had written it so Veronica was refereed to in only gender-neutral terms didn't help either.

Hisoka watched for a while. Kurapika was amazing, and somehow Hisoka felt the queer-subtext seeping through even if they were supposed to be opposite genders. He couldn't help but credit himself and his wonderful directing. However, he soon had to pull his gaze from them to get in place for his entrance.

The curtains shut for a moment, and three lunch benches were pushed out onto stage. Hisoka sat on his and tried not to stare too hard at Illumi.

When it came time for their introduction to each other, Illumi walked over his face as bright as it usually was when he was acting. Once he reached the table, however, the expression dropped into one Hisoka knew to be more genuine to himself. He fished in his pocket and pulled out a bandaid. Stripping off the paper casing, Illumi pasted it to the cut on Hisoka's cheek. The realistic but disingenuous smile returned and the scene proceeded as normal.

The edge of the bandaid started to peal as Hisoka picked at it subconsciously. Was Illumi ready for him to apologize? He hoped. Although, part of him thought Illumi should apologize first. If he had to label that part on his body, it would probably be his throbbing foot. The bandaid, however, was probably the most he would get.

Leorio emerged from the bathroom, smelling slightly of sick. “Kurapika.” He called to the blonde boy watching the play from behind the curtain.

Shalnark turned, looking confused.

“Sorry,” Leorio winced.

He heard a small chuckle behind him.

“Kurapika.” He said as he turned.

“We don't look alike.” Kurapika tried to stifle his smile.

Leorio just shrugged. He didn't feel like arguing, which made Kurapika very lucky as Leorio wasn't usually the type to let things go.

“Chrollo's ok.” Leorio said in a hushed tone.

“Hmm.” Kurapika sounded a little disappointed.

“He'll be good to be the cop instead of Killua like you hoped.” Leorio clarified. “I'm glad it all went to plan.”

“Me too.” The biggest smile Leorio had seen in a while, grew on Kurapika's face, “You were right.”

“About what?”

“I'm not getting into the colleges you're going to because my grades are shit, and I'd like to blame that on Chrollo too, but I can't. Not anymore. I'm s-”

Kurapika was cut off by the sound of clapping as intermission rolled around.

“I have to go do a costume change.” Kurapika sighed.

“I'll talk to you after the play ok?” Leorio grabbed onto Kurapika's hand and squeezed.

“Ok.” Kurapika walked off to find Machi, who had been glaring at him since Chrollo had to retire to the bathroom. He brushed past a rushing Hisoka as he made his way through the maze that was backstage.

Hisoka pushed past people in an attempt to reach Illumi as quick as was humanly possible. He needed to do something, anything. Whether he would speak from the heart, the brain, the foot, or somewhere else entirely was yet to be decided.

“Illumi,” Hisoka grabbed Illumi's shoulder and spun him around, “I'm sorry. I should of told you, and I would love to pretend that you shooting me makes me mad, but it doesn't. Fuck, you shouldn't of done it, but you could do anything to me. Shoot me. Hit me. Kick me. Poison me! I don't care. As long as I get to see that stupid bug-eyed smile,” Illumi looked away, “Whatever you want to do is fine by me, but I'd kill for reciprocation. Please?”

Illumi was quiet for a moment, overwhelmed with confidence behind the words. “Ok.” Was all he could muster.

“Ok?” Hisoka was still reeling, and slightly lightheaded.

“Alright.” Illumi said as if that made it clearer.

Ok, he forgave him? Alright, they could be together again? Ok, Illumi would throttle him behind the auditorium after the play was over? And more ran through Hisoka's head, but before he could get another word out, Illumi turned and walked away.

After all, someone had to kill Kurt and Ram.

Bang

Bang

Two shots rang out, and the action began.

Hisoka''s mind was still blurry from his long-winded speech, so he moved without really thinking, trying to piece together what exactly he had said and what “ok” meant. His distracted train of thought landed him on top of Illumi lying on the dinky bench seat of an old car.

Right. They were doing a play. Hisoka almost didn't realize looking into Illumi's cold eyes. He was always so expressive on stage, such a difference to his real demeanor. It threw him off to look into that indifferent glare.

Hisoka's eyes darted out into the audience, rather unprofessional, but he couldn't think of another reason why Illumi wouldn't be acting unless the curtains had closed.

Freezing hands wrapped around his neck, thumbs pressing into his throat, pulling him down. Even, Illumi's mouth was cold.

Oh. Oh my God. They were kissing, on stage, and people were watching. The realization hit Hisoka like a bus, but what still floored him was Illumi had initiated. He didn't think he'd ever get over that.

Hisoka got lost in the feeling of Illumi's lips under his. So much so, he didn't notice Chrollo, dressed in a too small cop uniform, come out on stage and stare forlornly at them.

“No.” He said into a walkie talkie, “Just too kids in car. Making out.” the last part was not on script and said meekly.

Chrollo made his exit, and the curtains swished closed.

They kissed for a moment longer. Uvogin stood to the side, awkwardly waiting for them to separate so he could get the car seat.

“Does that mean you forgive me?” Hisoka was breathless as he pulled away.

“It's not like it matters anymore. Everyone's got to know now, but yes.”

“Good.” Hisoka sighed, pressing their foreheads together. “Ok.” He stood, “We've got a play to finish.”

Chrollo was hurling his guts up again. Since he was blissfully unaware of the Clorox, he thought that the sight of Hisoka and Illumi on top of that ripped apart car seat had caused a resurgence in his anxiety induce sickness. Alas, his predicament was much less romantic, but it's not like anyone was going to tell him the truth.

“How's my muse?” Hisoka was beaming as he threw open the bathroom door. There were a couple scenes before he had to be back on stage, and he figured he had a responsibility to make sure Chrollo was alive considering how he got so sick.

“I don't know. He looked like he was having a great time when I saw him on stage.” Chrollo's voice was hoarse from the acid sick that had been spewing up his throat.

Hisoka heaved a sigh and crouched down next to Chrollo, brushing his hair back from his sweat shined face. “What do you want from me Chrollo? Nothing we ever did was more than casual. If you had cared, maybe you should've said it outright.”

Chrollo's breath hitched, “You don't remember a lot of what we did. You were either drunk or high, but-”

“Then it doesn't count.” Hisoka stopped him.

Chrollo closed his eyes and attempted to take a deep breath but was interrupted by rising bile. There wasn't much of substance left.

“Why him?” He managed.

“I don't know.”

“Liar.” Chrollo scoffed.

“I'm serio...” Hisoka didn't know why he was bothering, “Because no one else wants me the way I want them.”

“I do.” Chrollo whispered, but there was no confidence backing his words.

“No. You don't. You want some convoluted redemption arc where I fit into the perfect family you're trying to build for yourself, but I won't. I don't care enough about you to change myself.” Hisoka ran his fingers through Chrollo's hair, nails sliding along his scalp.

“Maybe.” Chrollo sat back on his knees. “What does Illumi want?”

“Chrollo. We both know that you don't care enough about me to change what you want either. What's the point?”

“Just tell me.”

“Nothing really. I'm not first choice. He cares more about his family, his future, even sports takes precedent over me. It makes it worth it, after all that hard work, for him to even look at me with anything behind his eyes. He's a challenge, and one that doesn't make me do backbends to fit a tiny box of his liking.” Hisoka sighed, pressing his hand to Chrollo's feverish forehead, “I guess it's just that he likes me back.”

“And you don't think I can do that?” Chrollo closed his eyes, relishing the cold of Hisoka's fingers.

“No.”

“Alright.” Chrollo stood, “I think I'm well enough to sit in the backroom with a trashcan.”

“Ok.” Hisoka stood with him and pressed a kiss to his ear, “I'll go get Shizuku.”

“Thanks.” Chrollo swallowed. His spit was sour with vomit.

“Anything for you sweetheart.” Hisoka let go of Chrollo to find Shizuku.

Chrollo didn't feel any better per se, but he did feel sure that he no longer wanted to do anything for or with Hisoka again. Some people were just lost causes.

The stage lights and fake ash adorning Illumi's face irritated his eyes, making them glassy and red. The curtains swished open, and the crowd began to cheer.

The cast stood in a line for bows, and after the third, Hisoka turned and brushed the ash off Illumi's lips and pulled him by the back of the neck into a kiss. There was a whistle in the crowd, and Hisoka turned to see Shizuku standing at the edge of the audience with two fingers in her mouth.

Illumi disregarded her, gazing at his family in the first row. Kikyo sat with her back straight clapping politely, Silva had his arms crossed and his expression was icy, Zeno was clapping but he looked disappointed, Illumi couldn't really blame him, and finally sat Milluki shooting him two thumbs up with a shit eating grin plastered on his face.

The curtain shut, closing Illumi off from his families prying eyes.

Hisoka laughed and grabbed Illumi by the waist, throwing him over his shoulder.

“Put me down.” Illumi was dead weight. It was astonishing Hisoka could carry him at all considering they weighed about the same, and Illumi had a knack for making himself cumbersome.

“No, I don't think I will.”

“I'll kill you.” Illumi slipped slightly, so he made a desperate grab at Hisoka's waist.

“No you won't. You love this.” Hisoka spun him around a little.

Illumi rolled is eyes, it was surprisingly hard to do upside down, and elbowed Hisoka in the back of his head as best he could manage in his position.

“Ow.” Hisoka relinquished his hold on Illumi's knees to rub the already rising bump.

Illumi flopped to the ground, narrowly avoiding smashing his head against the wooden floor. He sighed as he stood, “I should go find my parents.”

“Or you could run away with me.” Hisoka slid his arms around Illumi's waist.

“If they kick me out it's you and me babe.” Illumi's tone was as flat as always.

It took Hisoka a moment to realize, “Oh, you're joking.”

“Of course I'm joking. I'd rather die than live in that half-broken down truck.” Illumi pressed a kiss to the side of Hisoka's eye, “Alright,” he slipped out of his arms, “I'll meet you after I talk to them.”

“It's a date!”

“It'll be two seconds. I still have to go home.” Illumi crossed his arms.

“You could spend the night at my house.” Hisoka mimicked the gesture.

“I'm too tired.”

“Who said we'd be doing anything but sleeping?” Hisoka put a hand over his mouth, feigning embarrassment.

Illumi tried in vain to stop the red rising in his ears. “See ya.” he said with a smile on his lips.

“See ya.” Hisoka called after him.

The spring air was chilly at the late hour. Goose flesh prickled at Kurapika's exposed arms.

He felt a weight across his shoulders. The smell of the cologne Leorio insisted was the pique of manhood filled his senses.

“Thank you.” Kurapika turned to look at Leorio standing next to him.

“What happened to me being dramatic about the cold? You seem grateful now.” Leorio murmured adjusting the coat on Kurapika's shoulders.

“I stand by what I said, but it is cold tonight.” Kurapika sighed leaning his head against Leorio's shoulder.

“Whatever you say Sunshine.” Leorio put an arm around Kurapika, pulling him closer.

“Last person who called me that was Hisoka.”

Leorio laughed, “I shouldn't have left you alone. Hopefully he'll leave us be now that he has Illumi.”

“I don't know. He's unpredictable.”

“Yeah. I guess we'll have to stick together.”

They stood in silence, relishing the quiet night together.

Kurapika heaved a heavy breath. His shoulders slumped for the first time in a while.

“You were right,” Kurapika turned his rich brown eyes to look up at Leorio, “That was really stupid.”

“It was, but it turned out ok, and Chrollo's fine.”

“Part of me wishes he wasn't. I could've slipped in an extra couple drops.” Kurapika smiled.

“Part of me wishes that too, but I also know that hospitals would be less likely to hire me if they knew I had an ongoing relationship with a criminal.” Leorio pushed Kurapika off him and placed his hands on his shoulders.

“Ongoing?”

“You think it was hell being away from me? You still got to wake up and see that pretty face in the mirror everyday.” Leorio rubbed a thumb across the high of Kurapika's cheek bone.

Kurapika shook his head and began to laugh.

“We're not going to college together.” He said through his laughing fit.

“No.” Leorio began laughing with him.

“Maybe if I had tried in school, but revenge is so much easier.” Kurapika felt his breathless heaving turning into something sadder. Like a sob.

“Doesn't matter.” Leorio turned Kurapika's chin up to look at him. “Maybe talk to me like a person, instead of plotting murder like a crazed monster.”

“Sure.” Kurapika pulled Leorio into a hug, pressing his face against his chest.

“Hey, Kurapika?” Leorio asked.

“What?” Kurapika's voice was muffled against Leorio's shirt.

“I love you.”

The remaining tension melted from Kurapika's shoulders, “I love you too.”

He pushed off Leorio and straightened to reach Leorio's mouth with his own. Kurapika's face was salty with tears, but instead of the concern that they would usually spark in Leorio's heart, there was relief.

They were back together, and as long as they were honest and trusting, the amount of physical distance would not change that.

Hisoka leaned against the side of the building, staring, as menacingly as he could manage, at the Zoldyck family. Killua was not there, presumably off with Gon, and Kalluto and Alluka had not been allowed to attend.

He watched Kikyo put a hand on her husband's shoulder as he began to gesticulate first at Hisoka, then to himself, and finally to Illumi who was looking rather tired. The matriarch whispered something in his ear that effectively stopped his gesturing but did not dislodge the discontent in his expression. She turned to Illumi, putting a hand on his arm, and leant down to tell him something with a smile on her lips. At this Illumi straightened and said something that looked to Hisoka like a 'thank you'. Silva had begun pointing again, this time much of his frustration aimed at Kikyo, who just smiled and tried to wave him off. Zeno stepped in to put a hand on one of Silva's hands, saying something that sparked a smile to spread on Illumi's face. Milluki saw this as well and whispered something in his ear that caused Illumi to giggle slightly, and all attention was back on him. The cycle looked as if it was about to repeat itself as Silva scoffed, so Hisoka thought it best to intervene.

He bounced down the short slope to the group of Zoldycks. “Hey!” He said brightly putting a hand on Illumi's shoulder, “Your sons are spectacular actors you know. You raised them right Kikyo.”

“Thank you sweetheart.” Kikyo put a hand over her heart.

“Is that a Chanel suit? It's very lovely.” Hisoka remarked.

“It is! I've had it forever.” Kikyo was smiling and Hisoka could see the slight wrinkle at the edge of her eye.

“Look at the words coming out of this boys mouth.” Silva pointed to Hisoka.

Zeno sighed, “Yes I know. I'm disappointed that it's this boy as well, but this way he'll learn early.”

Hisoka decided to brush this off and move forward, “I don't know if Illumi asked yet, but would it be possible if he stayed the night at my house?” He pulled Illumi to him by the neck and kissed the top of his head. Illumi brought a hand to his face, closing his eyes. This had undoubtably made the situation worse.

Silva looked aghast and turned to Kikyo in disbelief.

“Maybe another time darling.” Kikyo could feel her husbands eyes boring into her, but she didn't turn to face him.

“He makes it so hard to wait you know.” Hisoka said without thought to the implications.

Zeno turned and began to walk away before anyone else could respond, “Let's just go to the car. Illumi, we'll wait for you there. Tell Killua where we are if you see him.”

Kikyo, Silva, and Milluki followed suit. Milluki glared over his shoulder at Hisoka, but it was more a playful warning of a younger sibling than anything else.

“I hate you more than I've ever hated anything in my life.” Illumi grumbled.

“You have a weird way of showing it.”

“They're not mad. Well, Father's not pleased, and Grandfather would prefer you were anyone else, but they don't really care enough about me to be mad.” Illumi shrugged.

“I'm sorry.” Hisoka said, “For not telling you that Killua knew.”

“You've said, and I forgive you. It's fine.” Illumi brushed it off as if this little tiff had never happened.

Hisoka gave him time to apologize himself, but the silence just stretched on, “Are you going to apologize to me?”

“Why?”

Illumi was an idiot. A very pretty one, but still dumb as a rock on occasion.

“My foot, my cheek?” Hisoka pointed to each.

“Oh. I gave you a bandaid,” As if that was enough, “And I'll pay for the hospital bill.”

“I didn't go to a hospital.” Hisoka waved him off, “I would, however, appreciate an apology.”

Illumi cocked his head, looking concerned.

“I called Machi. She's going to go to medical school you know.” Hisoka tried to reassure.

Illumi shook his head slowly, “You need antibiotics.”

“I have some.”

“They're prescription only.”

“Not if you know the right people.” Hisoka put his hands on his hips, looking very confident.

Illumi's brow furrowed before he brightened again, “Oh. There's good news.”

“What is it?”

“We have a house up at Mt. Shasta that we go to in Winter, but my mother said that, as a graduation present...”

A smile spread on Hisoka's face and he bit his lip.

“We can use it.” Illumi finished.

“Just us?”

“Just us. For a week.” Illumi paused, “If you want.”

“No I don't want to spend a week alone with you up in the mountains.” Hisoka jested.

“That's what I thought.” Illumi became very quiet, lost in thought.

“What are you thinking about?” Hisoka probed. He desperately wanted to know what went on inside his head, and would ask any chance he got.

“Hm. My mom really loves you. I don't know why. I barely understand how I can love you.” Illumi sighed, “I guess you're as charming as you say, but I still don't really see it.”

“You love me?” Hisoka's heart rose in his chest.

“Oh.” Illumi laughed shrill and quick, “I guess I do.”

Hisoka smiled at the expression on Illumi's face. It was so shocked at the thought that it was even possible to love someone like Hisoka. Hisoka found refuge in the fact it had happened at all.

He put his hands on Illumi's cheeks, feeling how chill they got in the cold night air, and pulled him into a kiss. One of Illumi's hands found its way to Hisoka's hip, and the other landed in his hair, tugging him closer.

When Illumi pulled away, that expression was still on his face, but it was just the slightest bit more sure.

“Ok. I'm off. See you Monday!” Illumi called over his shoulder as he borderline skipped away.

“You don't want to see me before that?” Hisoka yelled to him.

“I think I'm busy, but I'll check.” Illumi waved back and went to find Killua.

Hisoka smiled, it seemed Illumi had him, but it was not quite the other way around yet. Perfect. The bigger the challenge, the better.