Chapter Text
Brian's foot on their chest, pressing down. He doesn't quite put his weight behind it at first, and for a fraction of a moment they don't think he will.
After all, he already crushed their wrist. But then he shifts his balance with a creak of broken springs and a groan of warped metal, and ow.
Inside their chest, their lungs give. Thin metal crushing and breaking as their lungs pop, and any air in their chest is forced from their lips.
They're dead in moments as the metal tears through their heart and spine.
Oblivion.
Awareness creeps in, quicker than usual. They're alive, and they're awake. Eyes opening to light.
And oh. They can’t breathe.
They should not be alive right now. They figure.
But they are. For 40, 50 seconds they stay that way.
Their lungs aren’t cycling. They can feel the gears in their throat click click clicking one two three notches, trying to open their throat.
This was… awful. This whole situation was awful.
Brian's a fucking asshole. But at least this probably got the anger out of his system, they figure. Even if it hurts a lot.
They are probably the best person to hurt, anyway. They think. Out of everyone, they’re the least fucked up. Their mechanism isn’t fragile, and they’ve been hurt enough that almost nothing phases them.
Then they die again. Succumbing to suffocation.
Of course they wake up again.
Brian was talking. They couldn’t make much out beyond the roaring in their ears for oxygen. They were going to have a headache after this.
Then Ivy’s voice. Good, She was calming him down. Good. Good. He’d looked like hell, anyway. Should be resting while they fix him up. Then they die, snapping back into oblivion.
They wake up again. Half expecting Ivy to help them up.
But they smell blood.
For a moment, they’re confused. It's always disorienting, waking up from death's embrace.
But then their hearing comes back, and they hear Tim screaming.
They try to see, try to roll over, but with their legs shattered and lungs too broken to move, it's not like they can fucking do anything.
And Tim is just screaming. Ashes has only heard Tim scream like that a few times, very few times. They don't know what’s happening. His scream tapers into a gasping wail then into another scream. And they die again, 5, 10 seconds after waking. The jagged explosion of metal in their chest tearing through their heart. They’re so fucking helpless.
They wake up. The time between awake and oblivion is hard, but it can't have been long.
Tim’s not screaming, this time, but somehow thats worse. Wheezing long keens, whines peppered in with the occasional begging please. He’s begging, and Ashes doesn't even fucking know what Brian’s doing. They die to the music of Tim wheezing pleads of mercy, and they can't do jack shit.
He’s begging, and Brian isn’t stopping.
They wake up.
Tims is just whimpering now. The occasional whining sob tapering off into weak, wet coughs.
They try and figure out where he is, but something else in their lungs cracks , and the pain makes their vision go white.
They die, and they fucking hate how helpless they are.
The next time they wake, it's to silence.
Tim’s gone quiet, and Ashes can't fucking move.
Deaths and deaths and deaths later, they hear Marius and Raph talking, and by now the gears in their throat are spinning more than three clicks as the metal horror in their chest with every life breaks it's way closer to the right shape.
And then their lungs cycle a breath, with a harsh and loud clickclickclick they expand, cracking their ribs back into place roughly and Ashes doesn't have the air to scream with. But they have the oxygen to live with, so thats good.
That’s good at least.
Raph and Marius go quiet.
Unfortunately, as the metal slides to let in air, the cracked metal tears through some vital organ, or maybe their ribs do, and it fucking hurts, so they die again.
But the lungs were made to keep fucking breathing. By the next time they click to life, the lungs cycling again. And for the first time in who knows how long, Ashes can think.
They shove themself up, ignoring how their lungs shift inside them, how their wrists pop under their weight, how their vision goes black and white with the pain.
But it's fine. They’ve been through worse. (Even if tears spring to their eyes and they want to collapse.) (They don't have the option to collapse.) (not anymore)
Then they notice Raph’s hand is on their shoulder and they glare up at her. “Help me up.”
“Ashes are you sure-” Raph’s wings were fluttering anxiously, feathers bent and sparking in places.
“Help me up. Thats a goddamn order. What happened.” Ashes doesn't often pull rank, but when they do they are serious.
“We don't-” She cut herself off, biting at her nails. “I don't know!”
“What. Happened.” There is a dangerous lilt in Ashes’s voice.
“Brian went fucking insane is what happened.” Marius snapped, offering Ashes his metal hand.
His flesh one hung at his side. Fresh scar tissue trailing up from his wrist to his elbow.
“I know. Where is Tim.”
“He’s fine.” Raph started. Her wings were sending sparks across the room in arcs, and she was shaking more than a bit. Ashes had half a mind to tell her to go lay down.
“No, he’s not.” They stand up, batting off Marius’s hand and electing to lean on Aurora. They clench their teeth to stifle a wince. “Don't lie to me.”
“What’s more important is figuring out what he did to Jonny.” Raph jumped as a spark from her wings sizzled on her arm.
They did not want to fall over. But red bolts of agony striped up from their knees, and they blinked back tears as their legs nearly gave.
“What do you mean, figure out?” They snapped.
“We haven’t found him yet.”
All that did was light another seething fire inside them. “Oh goddamnit.”
“So-” Raph started.
“What did he do to Tim?” Ashes continued, talking over her. They didn't care, because right now Tim screaming was vivid in their mind.
“His eyes are wrecked,” Marius said, glaring at Raph when she opened her mouth. “I don't know what Brian was trying to do, but they are wrecked.”
And oh. Oh. Isn’t that just the goddamn cherry on top.
Brian fucked up their lungs. Which, dick move. But their lungs aren’t paper-strong. Not to mention, Ashes had been crushed a million times a thousand different ways. They knew they’d be fine. Their lungs don't break.
But Tim’s eyes?
They all knew better than to mess with them.
Because his eyes are a fucking tragedy to exist with.
“I’m going to toss him into another star.” Ashes doesn’t mean that, not at all, but goddamn did they want to.
“Ashes.” Raph warned.
“I’m going to at least bash in his head so he sees how it feels. ”
“Ashes!” Raph snapped. “I want to hurt him too but maybe after what we did to him, possibly, just maybe, hurting him more wouldn’t be great?”
Ashes seethed. She had a point, but Ashes was not going to acknowledge that. “Aurora?” They turned to her screen. “Where is Jonny?”
She is silent.
“Aurora, this is not the fucking time. We are going to find Nastya. I don't fucking care right now about your bullshit. As fucking stand-in captain, because goddamn I’m deciding that now, where the holy fuck is Jonny.”
[Outside.]
“What do you mean, he’s outside?”
Ashes was going to fucking snap.
[Brian tied him to a rope. He is outside.]
“Where.”
Nothing.
“Aurora, I will rip out every goddamn camera and microphone you have if you don't tell me where. Do not test me right now. ”
[Airlock 4.]
Ashes stalked towards the airlock. Standing on shattered legs because they didn't fucking care. Adrenaline was the only thing keeping them going.
They were going to rip Brian apart and toss his pieces across the goddamn universe.
Brian was dead next to the airlock. Ashes shot him between the eyes as they passed. Goddamn courtesy begone, He fucked up Tim’s eyes, broke their lungs, they can fuck him up a bit.
Then they nearly gagged.
The rope was jammed in the airlock. Tied off hastily and badly.
The only thing between Jonny and void was a rope, and an airlock door.
If they opened the airlock, it would fly out. There was hardly enough anchored inside to safely reel him in.
God. They should just fucking hurl Brian out there. At this point, they were almost tempted. They would never, but they’d be lying if they said they weren’t tempted.
Fucker.
Yeah, they fucking left him. Because left behind with knowledge of fucking where you are is better than goddamn missing.
They were going to lose it.
They don't know how they do it, not properly, they’re consumed by roiling anger and adrenaline as they reel Jonny in.
He’s dead, thank god. They hope he’s been dead the whole time.
He’s void-burnt. Skin frozen stiff after decompressing. His heart is ticking, but with the fact his blood is frozen they doubt it's pushing anything. They need to get him warm.
They carry him deeper into Aurora, and shoot Brian again on the way. Aiming for his chest. They hope they hit his heart.
Jonny’s skin is rapidly recompressing into dark red bruises blotching across his whole body. He doesn't have a pulse yet, his blood is frozen.
When it unfreezes it's not like he'd wake up any time soon with all the internal bleeding. When every blood vessel and artery in your body freezes or explodes, it's a while before you wake up.
They hate Brian for this.
Hate him for it.
But Jonny’s heart is thawing his blood, and Ashes doesn't want to fucking let go of him.
Marius meets them halfway. They just glower. “Come on, um.”
“Why aren’t you with Tim?” Because, if anyone should be with Tim it's Marius.
“Raph um. Told me to get you.”
“Find. Where is Tim?”
“This way!” Marius stumbles back. Away from them and their rage.
Good.
Ashes steps into the rec-room. Marius half a step ahead of them. They settle Jonny’s frigid stiff corpse on the couch, before sitting down, legs all but crumpling as they finally give themself permission to sit.
Their wrists crunch with every movement. Their ribs crack with every breath cycle.
They need to get Jonny warm.
Tim was unconscious on the other couch, head wrapped in loose and bloody bandages. Bits of metal poking the fabric from the inside, giving a horrifying impression of what lies beneath.
But he is safe, and more importantly, not awake.
Ivy’s body was propped up in the chair, She’s still blood-soaked, but not bleeding. Ashes doubts there's any blood left for her to bleed with.
They shrug off their jacket, and settle Jonny into their arms. Before dragging one of the blankets over them.
He’s ice cold against them, but they don’t care. “Marius, Raph, Brian is by Airlock 4. Lock him in the brig. Or something. That's an order. ”
Raph flutters nervously, but nods. Marius pulls her out, and Ashes breaks a little bit as they draw Jonny close and just hold him.
Slowly he would thaw, and Ashes knew the moment Jonny could get away from them he would, but for a bit, Ashes could hold him close and try force away that goddamn helplessless they feel.
Because right now they can protect him.
...Fuck, they need to find Nastya
Jonny was so cold. Deathly still, deathly frozen against them.
They pull the blankets tighter.
Arms around Jonny, they just hold him.
He started shivering minutes later, not pretty shivering like in movies, not jitters. Full body shaking as his body desperately tried to remember warmth.
They rested their arms around him and held him close.
It would be enough.
Jonny died not long after. A stroke. Oxygen gas from the void boiling his blood before it froze. His heart filtered the air from his blood as it tick tick ticked.
He was going to have a stroke or ten before he properly woke up.
So he kept dying, kept shivering so hard it was difficult to hold him.
But Ashes did. When their wrists stopped hurting like hellfire, they started running their hands up and down his arms and back, drawing heat into his body.
And then he woke up, still shivering from the cold but aware enough to jolt away. To fall off them and end up on the floor. Coughing and screaming.
But he gathered his wits and snapped around his knees. Shivering something harsh now.
“Tim’s right there.” Ashes kept their voice neutral. Forcing back the pricking jealousy.
Jonny nodded stiffly, going to stand. Only to topple over as his legs gave. A soundless scream.
Ashes stood up. Found their balance, ignoring how dizzy they felt. They pulled Jonny up by his arm and all but carried him to Tim. He fell next to Tim, curling around him. Tim stirred a bit, which startled Ashes for all of a moment, but he snuggled into Jonnys waiting arms.