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“So, Roronoa Zoro, what would you say is the biggest obstacle in the way of you becoming the Greatest Swordsman?”
Alex keeps their smile on their face as Roronoa blinks at them. Their microphone still hovers in front of his mouth. “What?” He finally responds.
“What would you say is the biggest obstacle in the way of you becoming the Greatest Swordsman?” Alex repeats. Roronoa blinks again.
“Uh,” he says eloquently. He blinks again. And again. And again, because of course.
Just as Alex is about to give up and find another more…outspoken pirate to interview, a much more interesting case comes bounding up. “Zoro!” Strawhat Luffy himself calls, leaping up onto Roronoa’s back. He peers at Alex over Roronoa’s shoulder, and Alex smiles serenely back. “Who’re you talking to?” He asks.
“Alex, at your service,” Alex smoothly cuts in. “My job is to find and interview rising pirate stars, and get the other side to the story that the more…mainstream newspapers present.”
Both of them stare at Alex blankly. Alex just barely keeps themself from sighing. “I’m asking you questions to learn more about you for a newspaper,” they say blandly. Strawhat’s eyes furrow.
“Why would you need to know more about me?” He asks. Alex sighs, this time outwardly, and questions everything that’s gotten them to this point.
“Mystery reasons,” they answer flatly, because they overheard Cat Burglar use that reasoning with him, and, well, it’s worth a shot.
Strawhat brightens.
“Oh, okay, you should’ve just said so!” He exclaims. Alex really wishes they didn’t have to maintain some sense of professionalism and could facepalm. “Ask me something, then!”
Alex shifts their microphone so it’s hovering in front of Strawhat’s mouth. “So!” they start. “What made you want to become Pirate King?” Strawhat blinks at them.
“Because I wanna! Duh!” He answers, looking at them as if they’re stupid. And, yeah, okay, Alex can accept that. That wasn’t a good way to phrase it.
“Okay,” they say slowly, “But…what inspired you to become the King of the Pirates? Fame, riches – everyone has a reason. What’s yours?”
Something in Strawhat’s eyes sharpens in that instant. He places a hand on his head, pulling down his Strawhat and staring at it. “Freedom,” he says after a moment. “I want freedom.” And- that’s not quite the answer that Alex had expected.
Huh.
Maybe this won’t be quite the same as all the other pirate-interviewing jobs they’ve done. Normally, it’s open-and-shut; the pirates want money, or they want to be known everywhere. Curious, Alex responds, “Are you doing this for anything else also? Money, or fame, or anything like that?”
“Nope!” Strawhat immediately says. Alex glances at Roronoa out of the corners of their eyes, and though he hasn’t said anything since his captain arrived, Alex is getting the sense that he also agrees. Interesting.
Alex wants to learn more about these pirates.
“Those two are morons!” A new voice pipes in, and Alex glances over their shoulder to see who must be Cat Burglar bounding up to them. She’s got- damn, that must be fifteen bags of clothes hung on her wrists, how much money did she spend? She comes over, and shoves her bags at Roronoa. Strawhat bounces off Roronoa’s back, laughing as Roronoa curses and catches the bags.
“How much did you buy?” He grunts, readjusting his grip and hoisting the bags over his shoulder without any struggle. Cat Burglar winks at him.
“Nothing!” She says cheerfully. Roronoa levels a flat look at her.
“Devil woman.”
“And proud!”
Roronoa rolls his eyes, turning his back on them. “I’m taking these back to the ship,” he tells them. Cat Burglar blows a kiss to him.
“Thanks!” She says cheekily. “Give the food for Sanji for me!”
“Tch,” Roronoa scoffs, before he turns and starts to walk away.
“Wait!” Alex calls after him. “You haven’t answered my question!”
Roronoa shoots them a flat look. “Mihawk, duh!” He calls back. Alex stares at his back for a bit.
Yeah, okay, that one was a dumb question.
Shaking their head, Alex turns back to their next interviewee. “Alex, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” Alex introduces, holding out a hand for Cat Burglar to shake. Cat Burglar eyes it, but shakes it in the end. Her grip is firm. Alex grins.
“You know, most civilians would be afraid of us,” Cat Burglar says consideringly. Alex shrugs.
“I’m a journalist,” they say casually. Cat Burglar lets out an understanding noise.
“Ah.” They share a meaningful look. Then, Strawhat lets out a shout.
“Oh, there’s Brook and Usopp! Cya!” He starts running.
Alex calls out, “Wait, I’m-!”
Unfortunately, Strawhat’s already gone. Alex sighs. “Anyway,” they say, turning back towards Cat Burglar. She’s got laughter in her eyes. Alex lets the mask fall for a moment and asks despairingly, “Is he always like that?”
“Yes,” Nami answers in amusement. She crosses her arms, raising her eyebrows. “Yes, he is.” Alex sighs.
“Well,” Alex says, getting back on track, “Now that I’ve got you here – what did you mean earlier, when you said your captain and first mate were morons? Are they not above you in terms of command?”
Cat Burglar snorts. “Alex, you’ve gotta have met enough pirates by now to know that chain of command can mean absolute shit sometimes.” Alex lets out a huff of amusement.
“Maybe so,” they concede, “But still, I find myself curious.”
“What’s this for?” Cat Burglar asks instead of answering, narrowing her eyes suspiciously at Alex. Alex shrugs.
They say, “I work for a newspaper that tries to get both sides of the story. I’m sure your crew is more aware than most of the flaws the World Government has, and the mainstream papers are all controlled by them.”
Cat Burglar’s eyes grow cold, her hands fisting ever so slightly tighter. Alex has no doubt she’s thinking about their attack on Enies Lobby, or the corruption that caused the tragedies at Alabasta, or- well, or the obvious. “Yeah,” she says darkly. “Yeah, we're aware.”
Alex winces internally, hoping they hadn’t pushed too far, and waits. Eventually, Cat Burglar shakes her emotions and says brightly, “What I meant is that they’re both idiots because they’re not going for the top for money or anything like that. Luffy couldn’t care less if there was money there! It’s ridiculous!”
Cat Burglar sounds exasperated, but Alex can catch a hint of fondness threaded through her voice. She’s being what most captains would consider disrespectful, while sounding like she’d rather nothing more than be there. “Sounds rough,” Alex says, a slight grin tugging at their lips.
“So rough,” Cat Burglar says emphatically, and that statement is definitely fond. Despite themself, Alex smiles.
They jot down a couple notes on their notepad – this article is going to be an interesting one, for sure – and then say, “Well, I’m off to find more pirates to interview. It was lovely meeting you. Who knows, maybe we’ll come across each other again some day.”
“Maybe we will,” Cat Burglar says, putting a hand on her hip and offering Alex a smile. Alex smiles back. “It was nice meeting you, too. Good luck with the rest of your interviews – you going to the Heart Pirates next?” she asks.
Alex glances down at their to-do list. “Yeah, looks like,” they confirm. Cat Burglar snorts.
“Good luck with them, then,” she says, barely hiding her laughter. “Tell old Tra-guy that I say hi.”
“Will do,” Alex agrees, stifling their snicker at the nickname. They debate asking if there’s anyone they should avoid, before deciding against it.
They can handle themself.
“Well, have a wonderful day!” They call over their shoulder as they turn away. Cat Burglar simply waves, her attention quickly being ripped away when a taller black-haired woman – Nico Robin, Alex notes – wraps an arm around her shoulders and starts talking to her. Alex fully turns their back, and walks away.
They have a crew to interview, but more importantly, an article to write.