Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

August had always been a quiet person, and it wasn’t just because they were a mouse hybrid. They had tons of siblings from brothers, sisters and those in between who were as outgoing as any lion, tiger or bear. Yet, as the oldest they found that time and time again that they couldn’t live up to the expectations set for them. Home had started to feel claustrophobic, their relationships with their family and siblings far more restrictive. There was this silent urging to live up to their parents and even siblings' expectations to prevent them from being disappointed.

It seemed that even with their friends the connections they strived to keep never meant much to them either.

Even at their job, August felt binded down to a work desk, squinting at the computer screen while editing over another book late into the night. The only reason they kept the job besides the fact that they had been saving up their money since forever was partly from not wanting to hear “I told you so” from their parents who had been against the job since the beginning.

Maybe what they did next was an awful thing to do, given they didn’t even like the job that much, yet they still accepted the promotion. Their personal life was suffocating them, and the promotion only strained it even more, as with the new promotion came the need to move out to a new location.

While there was a comfort at being at home, knowing each step and easily able to navigate nagging conversation and their siblings' teenage drama there was also a deep loneliness. All these people who swore that they loved them, would support them no matter what only to be constant reminders of what they were supposed to be… Supposed to do.

In the end they didn’t care, their parents didn’t want what was best for them. They just wanted to have control of them. And so that dreaded promotion gave them the ability to break away from the prison that they had found themselves trapped in for years.

August shook their head to get rid of the memories, eyes downcast as they picked at their sharp nails. Their tail whipped back and forth in nerves as they hesitantly explored the small town of Green Hills, finding a cute charm to it all. It was much different then the cramped life that they had lived in the city. Everything was spaced out; even the house they owned had a back and front yard for them to explore, along with a spacious layout which felt even bigger given her meager packing. Moving to Green Hill’s alone was the exciting part, but the less exciting bit was what was left of their bank account after.

Which left them here, longingly looking into store fronts and trying to find a place with cheap furniture to fill up the empty space. They had thought that they would be fine living with those empty spaces but it was glaringly obvious empty spaces that made it hard to feel as if they were at home instead of an interloper. Walking down the street they would hesitantly smile and wave at the people who waved back. All of the shops looked interesting, or cute with their smaller size yet they felt far to un-sure with themselves.

Maybe that’s why seeing the flower shop farther down the street made them light up, something strange, yet familiar in the same breath. Their large round ears twitched, perking up at the sight, their excitement more than obvious. They had never seen a flower shop that looked this bold before, as the ones in the city where forced to try to survive through the concrete cracks between alleyways and fast food restaurants.

As they walk in, the bell above the door rings, making the young man at the counter look up from his phone. He looked mildly interested by their entrance, saying a quick greeting then a, “how can I help you?”

“Oh, I’m just here to look around,” they spoke softly, unable to get their voice to be any louder.

With the quick dismissal they were left to look around. The flowers were beautiful, growing wild and free, much better taken care of then the ones she was use to seeing. They all looked happy if that made sense. Their round ears twitching very aware at every shift from the man at the counter. For a moment they just quietly listened to the man type on his phone, wondering if they could make a friend this way. The idea was quickly brushed aside as he was on his work hours; it wouldn't be fair to do that. They would’ve hated it if someone tried to do that to them while they were at work.

While there were less people here to befriend she saw it as more of a positive it didn't matter back home that there were millions of people within the bustling city the intimacy they desperately desired wasn’t present. Only a hollow sense of duty.

Before they could think too deeply over the fact they hadn’t made any connections in the months they had been here, the shop bell rang again. Except the man didn’t greet whoever it was instantly. Peeking around a shelf of tall plants they found a tall man walk in, thick and wavy black hair framing his face. They could tell it had red streaks that only made his red eyes pop out even more from his darker skin. The ears atop of his head, while small, were pointed, making her subconsciously pull on her larger round ears.

"Uh, good afternoon,” the clerk spoke slowly, looking hesitant. Did they know each other? “How can I help you?"

The man seemed to stare at the clerk for a moment, before turning away. Which they thought was kinda rude but maybe he had social anxiety? Though if anyone should be anxious, they believed it should be themselves! While what little glimpse they got of the strange man shows he was incredibly attractive, he was also intimidating. Most of the people they had met before were older people, and teenagers as most people their age had moved out of this town to go to the city or somewhere bigger than here. He was striking, wearing all black, the only signs of color where the white fur upon his leather jacket, the red patches of- things she couldn’t read (Anarchy, maybe?) upon it with the white shirt underneath it.

They watch as the man silently goes through the isles for a moment before staring at the flower in front of them. August finds themselves unable to move their own feet even as the strange man walks closer, easily able to hear each, and every soft footstep he makes. Swallowing nervously, they tried to buck up the courage to get out from where they had stood, only for when they turned around to walk the other way to practically bump into the man. Due to their short height they face planted into the mans chest, making them scream silently as they quickly back off, stuttering and stumbling on their own words as they feel their face heat up.

"What are these?"

August doesn’t realize he’s even talking to them at first, struck dumb by his deeper voice. It’s smooth and husky; something relaxing to listen too. It wasn’t until they realized his red eyes are on her green, making them break out in a cold sweat. They don’t know why he’s asking them instead of the person that actually runs the flower shop but…

Staring at the flowers they know the answer instantly without having to look at the shape of the leaves. They had spent many months with their grandma in attempts to get away from their bustling house, and the older woman had loved gardening, having taught them everything and anything they had wanted to know about plants.

They swallowed nervously, before speaking, “Those are asters… They can meaning symbolizes love or of daintiness.” Unable to stop themselves they started to infodump, “The meanings associated with flowers have changed over time, and different cultures assign varying meanings to the same species. So it changes from person to person depending on where they are from, and who you ask. Though not everyone even knows the meaning of most flowers since the flower language isn’t as popular as it use to be. It’s more of a curiosity now, and a way to get a glimpse into our ancestors' past.”

They let out a woosh of air after having spoken so much the man did not even blink at the sudden word vomit, simply having moved his finger to caress the slim purple petals of the aster before moving on.

“And these,” he asked pointing to a slightly wilted blue flower. It had to be the saddest looking flower in the whole shop, which was slightly puzzling as all the other flowers in the shop seemed well taken care of.

“Those are blue salvia,” they said knowing their face was burning in embarrassment with the unexpected interaction yet thankful the man hadn't said much to them. “They're usually used to say, ‘Get better soon.” But the meaning can change with the flowers color- red salvia are meat for romantic partners, and mean forever mine, while the purple ones are used to cheer on ones success. These blue ones here mean ‘I miss you’ or ‘I’m thinking of you.’"

He nods, studying the display silently. They want to walk away but they can’t seem to find an opening to say that they were leaving. They didn’t want to suddenly walk away only to be spoken to again, and then what if they didn’t hear him??? Then he would think they were an asshole, but it’s hard to understand what people say sometimes an-

They blink owlishly, noticing the man picking the pot up, before they could stop themselves they reach out and stop him, making the man glare at the sudden contact. “S-sorry just if uh if the person you're giving this too knows flower language giving them a wilted plant will make them upset since it will come across as you not caring for them.”

They only get a short hum in return, before as he gently puts the pot back down.

"Are you looking for something in particular?"

They ask, waiting for him to reply wondering what he was doing in the shop in the first place. Did he upset his partner? Was he hoping to get them an apology gift? They didn't think he was a flower enthusiast, or someone who would keep flowers in his house.

Then again looks could be surprising!

"If you are then I wouldn’t mind helping you out!" They tried to inject a bit of excitement into their voice to show their sincerity.

August didn’t receive an answer, the man staring at them for far longer than they were use to. They were so caught up in the conversation with the man, that they didn’t notice the man at the counter sighing heavily and rubbing his temples. They grew antsier the longer the silence continued, his presence growing slightly unnerving. The smile upon their face started to feel plastered as their thoughts raced from ‘why isn’t he saying anything’ to ‘god did I say something that offended him?’

Desperate for any kind of conversation they introduced themselves, “Oh, sorry I didn’t introduce myself.” Holding out their hand their eyes glanced down to his own hands noticing the flash of gold bracelets. “I’m August, what's your name?”

He blinks at them- once, twice, three times- and for a breathless moment they wanted to simply die. For the earth to swallow them up and leave nothing of their body to be seen so they wouldn’t have to be trapped like this anymore. Why even get stuck in this social situation, maybe they shouldn’t make friends maybe they should be alone for-

“Shadow.”

His voice rips through their thoughts, causing them to blink owlishly up at him. They swear for a moment that he smirked at them but surely it just had to be a trick as his face looked as expressionless as before.

“Shadow,” they repeated softly, lowering their hand when they realized he wouldn’t be shaking their hand.

“Just killing time.”

The way he says it almost sounds like a joke of its own as they swear up and down they can hear amusement in his voice. They couldn’t even enjoy the relife that he even replied to them and that they didn’t have to refer to him as "the man" and "he" inside their head. No, of course they couldn’t not when he simply walked away leaving them in the isle without even buying anything.

Their head was spinning and they swore for a moment that they would faint. They never had an interaction like this before. They had to deal with assholes before, and people who thought that they would simply treat them like a rug but nothing like this.

“Sorry about him,” the clerk's voice called, making them realize they had been standing and staring at the door for way too long.

“He’s a bit,” the other man trailed off, waving his hands as if trying to grasp at how to explain about the others appearance. “Different.”

Without realizing it, August had grabbed the wilted blue salvia bringing it to the front. The clerk looked sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck the movement bringing attention to the fact he had gills.

“Oh, we have more lively looking Salvia you don’t need to buy that one,” he said as he stared at the truly pitiful plant.

“No it’s fine-” August paused, eyes flicking to his name tag before adding, “Nolan. I want this plant, it needs a bit of personal love, I’m sure that it’ll be fine.”

“If it dies then you can come back, and get a free plant of your choosing,” he said the words coming out in more of a sigh at their apparent stubbornness.

They huffed, feeling their lips curl into a smile, “oh, so do you want to make a bet? That I’ll be coming back here to collect on that free plant voucher.”

He shook his head, a little laugh escaping him, his dark brown eyes twinkling, “oh yeah sure let's make it a bet. I bet that you’ll be back here next weekend.”

They shake hands and for some reason August feels like they have just found exactly what they where looking for.

Chapter Text

The blue Salvia they took home sat inconspicuously on their work desk feeling a bubbling warmth building in their chest at the sight of it. The week before they had sat at this very same desk, brooding about their situation. No one had clicked with them, oh sure their new coworkers where friendly, very chatty unlike themselves but there was no after work bonding like they expected would happen. No lunches spent getting to know each other, nor gossiping about office things.

They had been alone. Their loneliness swallowed them whole, the large empty house only making everything worse; pretending that all they needed was the independence and new freedom. But that line of thought had died a quick death the longer they had spent nights in, watching TV and even working at home to pass the time. The town was small and while the locals weren’t nasty to them per say they still felt othered in a way.

“I still have issues,” they said out loud looking at the wilted plant. “But- but the issues aren’t as bad. Sure Shadow was weird, but Nolan was really sweet.”

In ways Nolan was the friendly face to latch onto, the seemingly perfect person to bond with. (On off hours, of course) Yet- their brain must be crazy as every so often the full mystery of Shadow was truly a tempting one. Of wanting to go out to meet him once more, and just learn about him, the curiosity was practically eating them from the inside.

“Is it even right,” they said to themselves, pulling at the short strand of their dark hair. “I mean, would it be wrong to get invested in someone because you were curious? I'd be upset if someone did that then dropped me because they got bored of me or had found out what they wanted.” August wasn’t that kind of person but they still worried they would be seen as that type of person, or misunderstood.

It wouldn’t be the first time that’s happened.

“I’m just overthinking again, aren’t I?”

A ding from their computer drew their attention, making them sigh at the sight of a very familiar email handle.

“Ah, I love her but does she have to send updates every twenty minutes…”

A couple weeks ago they had picked up a writer for the company. The woman whose pen name was Silver, had sent the first draft of their novel. There were so many things wrong with the story they didn’t even know where to start. Silver was far too sweet for her own good, but the woman had a way of being over anxious… She was naive in ways, and not confident in her own work, always asking if a line was written well, or if they should change it especially after August had told her to overhaul her full novel. Their anxiety reminded them of themselves, but worse. They felt like that was saying something.
With a shake of their head, they started to get to work, scrolling through the next chapter that Silver sent. They carefully combed through each sentence, reading it over and over until the words seemed to bleed into each other. They wanted to give the best work to Silver, as the woman had so much talent if only they could let it bloom and gain more confidence in herself.

After reading several pages of the twelve-point Times New Roman, August felt her eyes droop, closing them as they slumped in their seat. They folded their arms, forehead thumping against their arms as they sighed, ears dropping. After hours of work and sitting in the same spot they couldn’t find it in themselves to continue.

How long they sat there, they didn’t know but somehow they found themselves standing up suddenly.

One moment they were in comfy pj’s and slippers then the next they were wearing a sundress with sneakers. They had left the house, starting their trip out of the neighborhood knowing that it would be easy to walk to the nearest grocery store. They supposed that they needed a bit of time out of the house to get some fresh air. They knew they couldn’t put off their work for Silver already but they only had ten more pages to read through. Looking up at the sky, they stood on the street off to the side for a moment, watching the sun slowly set. The sky was a beautiful pinky orange that made them wish that they could capture the beauty in a photograph yet nothing could truly capture the beauty of being right in the moment.

It was quiet, which wasn't unusual for the time of day, but they suddenly wished for a little noise to distract them from their ever pressing thoughts. Whispers of, ‘you shouldn’t stay out too long at this rate you’ll need to make an extra large pot of coffee to get you through the long night.’ or ‘Leaving work to goof off? How responsible of you.’

“Come on, be nicer to yourself,” they whispered to themselves, combing their fingers through their hair as they walked aimlessly forward. The warmth of the summer instead of the heat being unbearable feels like a warm hug, comforting and cozy. If they only had half a brain cell they might have even thought laying down on the bit of grass next to the sidewalk would be a good idea.

Their eyes glazed off the many tempting signs, they still hadn’t found quite the right furniture at the thrift shops they went too but they were hopeful if they kept looking around every so often they would find a peace they spoke to them.

If worse came to worst they could always buy something online or or find something used online and drive out to get it. Their pace slowed at the smell of sugar, making them turn to see a small coffee shop that they hadn’t seen on their last outing.

“It would be cheaper to just go home and drink what I have.” Of course it was obvious that coffee at cafe’s would be more expensive but… Was it wrong to treat themselves? Without any continuous thought their feet carry them to the glass door. The bell rings softly above their head as they take a step inside, a wave of calm wrapping around them. Oddly enough there was no one at the counter, making them stand in the doorway for a moment wondering if the store was closing up for the night.

Yet they step a bit farther in, and just in time too as the door behind them opens, the bell ringing and drawing their attention to the person who just walked in.

They do a double take as they realize that it’s Shadow, making their eyes widen, “It’s you! From yesterday!” All he does is raise a brow from their outburst, not replying as expected of him; it fits his track record at least. He did stop though which was a little surprising.

August stepped off to the side, just in case anyone else would come into the store as they attempted to hold a conversation with Shadow once more and hoped for… Maybe his phone number? They felt that, or at least hoped that they could talk better over text. Or maybe that was too creepy, was it too desperate of them? They just- well no matter how awkward they felt yesterday they were curious!

The first thing that’s noticeable about him today is that he looked very toned down, it was almost a strange sight to see even though they didn’t know him well enough to tell if this was something he’d usually wear on his off time. He was wearing a dark shirt, and what appeared to be dress pants with some sneakers that had seen some better days. He doesn’t seem to notice them scrutinizing him, or if he did he didn’t care.

As they continued to study him, they thought that he’d look pretty with a Calendula flower crown. He’d look pretty with orange and yellow, and a few softer colors.

“SHADOW!”

A woman's voice practically growls, making whatever clever thought pops straight out of their head. Jerking towards the sound of the voice, they are surprised to see a woman with olive skin and- was it rude to think she had the biggest tits that August had ever seen on a person. (They were huge but they also must have been soft, whoever she let sleep on them was surely lucky.) Her large ears flicked towards her, her arms moving created a slight breeze due to her bat wings.

Their greeting to the woman was short, and barely audible, and the only way that they knew she heard was because of the way the large ears atop of her head swiveled to them. Besides that they were ignored as she dragged Shadow away, making them realize that he must work here.

Shyly, they step up towards the long wooden counter. Taking a deep breath in they are met with the smell of espresso and donuts making their stomach rumble. While they were still a bit tired the smell was refreshing all on its own.

They were soon proved right as Shadow came out wearing a light brown apron making it apparent he’s a barista. Looking up at all the choices, they nervously shift in place not wanting to make him wait long for their order. He’s writing something down as they place their hands upon the countertop, nails tapping upon it in a nervous tick. The movement catches his attention momentarily but he doesn’t look up at them, still scribbling on a piece of paper, but he asks, “What can I get you? Our specialty tonight is the hot chocolate frappuccino with extra whipped cream, and chocolate sauce.”

“I’ll have that.” They stupidly replied not having found anything on the menu that had caught their eye so far. The corner of his lips curls up into a crooked smirk, the look almost reminiscent of yesterday. He didn’t even try to hide it! Quickly their eyes dropped to the counter, feeling their face warm.

“I- I’d also like a birthday cake donut to go with it,” they added having at least found some dessert that looked interesting unlike the drinks. They play with the flap on their phone case where they kept their drivers license and bank card. They’re practically boring holes into the countertop as they listen to the tap, tap of his fingers upon the cash register following a ding.

“That’ll be a dollar fifty.”

They can feel question marks dance around their head as they send him a questioning look. The embarrassment is forgotten as they manage to stutter out, “but- uh, it, it costs more than that?”

Any person of course would like getting things cheaper of course, but August couldn’t find it in themselves to take advantage of the place. Especially since it was a smaller store instead of a big company chain.

“Yeah, it is. But you look like death warmed over. You need the coffee more than the store needs the money,” he comments, a sly smile framing his words.

They aren’t sure if he’s trying to flirt with them or if he was insulting them, making their face scrunch up in confusion. Lips parted they are ready to rebuke him, only for the woman- Rouge she believed her tag said call out from the back, “I’ll be docking that off your pay!”

Feeling their blood go cold, they scramble with their phone pulling out their card. “I-, I’ll pay for my drink, you don’t have to do that!”

He takes it from them, reading their name on the card carefully. “You just did,” he said and hands the card back to them before tapping on the register again.

They aren’t sure if they’re going to faint as they try to frantically shove their card back towards him. “No- No really I- I can pay, you don’t have to do that - I mean I can’t let you do this its really sweet and thoughtful but your boss an-”

As August finds themselves going on a nervous ramble, Shadow just hums, grabbing a plate and then a mug. They’re still rambling, as he pulls a donut out and places it on the plate, setting it down on the counter before going off to make the drink they ordered. With a heavy sigh, they facepalm, the soft smack sounding far too loud for the mainly empty cafe.

If they weren't in public they might’ve started pulling their hair in frustration. It seemed he would win this round- they couldn’t fight him over it and they rather not make a bigger fuss over everything. Grabbing the donut, they scurry over towards a booth, sitting snug in a corner and away from prying eyes. They hoped that this would be the end of it so they could enjoy their donut and drink in peace before making their way back home.