Chapter Text
“And ye shall go forth, and grow up with the rise of the sun”- Malachi 4:2
It was hard to miss something you had never really given much thought to. In their old world, the sun rose every day and set just the same. It was the only thing that gave the world any routine, any stability at all. It had made the common man worth something.
And so its loss was not something insignificant.
Yet it was not something Rumi had ever really considered missing. They couldn't picture a sunrise even if they tried. They’d never counted their existence in days or years, they measured it by the lives they’d lived. The sun rising and falling was nothing more than routine in their life, that's it.
And so looking at it now, watching it slowly rise over the skyline for the first time in months, they were struck by a deep hollowness they weren't quite expecting.
They felt its warmth on their face, but they had always preferred the coolness of the moon. They looked at it, watched the grass and trees illuminate as they’d never seen before, but truthfully it only blinded Rumi. Its shine only made them feel like their imperfections were on display, no longer hidden behind the dull glow of shadow.
They guessed it symbolized the end of their journey, the rising sun, a celebration of their victory in a way. But to Rumi, it only felt like a hollow pat on the back after months worth of hard work.
It felt underwhelming.
The three of them sat there, having found a satisfactorily placed log to rest on. It felt like the least they could give themselves after the battle they just endured; it was nothing short of a miracle that they had survived. They figured it probably was a miracle, none from a god- after all, they had just killed them all - but maybe from a much more forgiving entity, one that didn't wish to rid the world of all its good.
And so Rumi sat there, catching their breath, watching the sun once again grace the world they’d fought tooth and nail for. Peter on their left, and Thanatos on their right, the only two people they had really been able to call friends in their life. They turned their head, watching as Sunny upped his nose, basking in the first specks of light; it illuminated his soft fur, letting its iridescence glow. They supposed it was hard for many, not having the sun to go by, to believe in. They wished they could feel the comfort it brought Sunny, wanted to feel its warmth and be content, not scared.
They also thought that there was only so much one person could ask for. And the fact that they were all alive was already too good to be true.
“I've literally dreamt of seeing a sunrise again,” Peter was leaning forward on his knees, what glass was left in his glasses went white in the light, completely obscuring his eyes. That was another reason to hate the sun, it blocked out Peter's eyes.
“I've never really thought about it,” Rumi commented.
“Really?” Peter tilted his head to look at them, the sun bouncing off his glasses into their eye “It’s kind of hard to forget, you know? When the only thing that gave your life a routine or steadiness goes missing,” he paused for a second, “Not that I hated the endless night with you guys, it's just that- well the sun was- is kind of what defines our lives ya know. When it goes away we go away and when it comes out we come out. It's going to be nice to have normal back.”
Rumi had forgotten that Peter didn’t really come from the same place they and Thanatos had come from. Peter hadn't come into this with an ulterior motive. He’d simply come because Rumi has asked.
Look at all that had happened because of that one question.
“I never much missed the sun either,” Thanatos said. “The day it was taken was the day my life began, it only seems fitting the day it returns is the day my life is to end.”
It was funny, Rumi thought, how this thing that they never thought about had meant so much to both of their friends. It set them apart in a way. They’d never considered themself to be driven by the same things as everyone else, whether that meant by love or strength or basic human need, they guessed that meant the routine of the sun cycle as well.
Peter, next to them, rustled with the terrarium on his bag, grabbing Lizard out with a careful hand that could only come from someone as considerate as Peter. “You feel that Lizard? Didn't you miss it? It’s just like being under your heat lamp back at home.” Another thing Rumi had never thought about: Peter’s home. “I know you’ve been cold the last few hours, without Exandroth, I hope this makes up for it.” Rumi watched as Lizard licked his eye in what they could only assume was glee.
They looked out again, at the horizon line. The sun was almost completely visible now, casting its rays over the forest almost biblically. “This is more beautiful than anything any god could do.”
“Well said Peter,” Thanatos replied. Personally, Rumi couldn't see it; the things Peter could do with the power of the harpblade had been simply marvelous.
They wondered if they’d looked the same.
“I didn't even realize how cold it had been under the moon.”
“Maybe Exandroth had some magical heating power?”
“Worst personal heater in the world.”
“Saved you carrying around a coat though.”
“A coat could have saved a few more cuts and scratches than Exandroth”
“A coat wouldn't have turned you into a worm.” Thanatos added.
“Hey, we said we wouldn't bring up the worm thing. You know it's a tender topic for him.”
Thanatos let out a chuckle, as he only had once before. It was still an odd sound to the ear. “I only jest.”
“Did you really miss it that much Peter?” Rumi looked at him. They always felt grounded when looking at Peter, they wondered how long they had been in love with Peter through their visions. Probably longer than they had known.
“It was hard to live without,” Peter set his hand in Rumi’s. “Thank you for getting it back for me.”
Rumi wanted to say that it was never really their intention to bring back the world's light, if only metaphorically. But they also knew that if Peter had only ever asked for the sun to return, Rumi would have instantly made it their top priority. Would have killed the gods, not for their power, but to make sure Peter could let the world's orange glow wash over him once again.
“Do not undermine your own role in the task Peter.”
“I didn't do much Thanatos.”
“You set us all on the right path. Without you, I'm sure Rumi and I would have failed.”
“Well I-”
Rumi cut him off with a hand squeeze, “Just accept the compliment Peter.”
He nodded and Rumi felt a hand squeeze in return.
“Thank you, Thanatos.”
They sat there then, in mostly silence, just watching the slow ascent of the sun. letting the world flood with an orange glow. The trees no longer shrouded in a layer of blue, but rather seeing their oranges and greens shine in a way that made one reconsider nature's strength.
Slowly, as the minutes passed the world began to come alive . It started with the rustle of a bush, then the chirp of a bird.
Rumi saw Peter close his eyes, and a familiar dull golden glow shone from him, the very same that used to shine out from their blade. They watched as the plant life around them started to bud and flower, finally having the light- and some magical assistance- to live again. Leaves stopped wilting and small game began poking out from shrubbery.
Rumi hadn't realized how dead the world had been until they saw it live again.
Was this the damage they had- albeit indirectly- caused?
“It’s beautiful Peter.”
Peter opened his eyes and looked at Rumi.
“I took inspiration from something else beautiful.” Peter squeezed their hand again. It was a comfort Rumi didn't think they could ever get enough of.
“So, what's next then?” Rumi threw the question out, more as a joke than much else. They weren’t in a rush to get going, they didn't really know what there was after this. What are you supposed to do after your dream of becoming a god fails?
“Well there is not much for me, I suppose.” The two looked over at Thanatos.
“Well don't say that Thanny, I know we’ve completed your purpose but there's a lot more to the world. Maybe you can experience the wonders of a nice pastry or something.” They paused, “Can you eat food?”
“That will not be necessary.” He turned, so his illuminant blue eyes were staring right at the two. “I have explained to you my desires of life after, or more specifically my desire to have a lack thereof. Now that our goal is complete there is not much more left for me. I do not wish to live with the guilt.” There was silence for a moment, a chill even the early morning light couldn't resolve.
“Well I didn't think you were serious.”
“When have I ever joked.”
“I will not take your life Thanatos.”
“Then Peter will.”
“Peter will not.”
“Then I will myself.”
“We’ve just saved the world Thanatos can't we just have one moment of peace?”
“This is not my peace.”
“Well, it's not mine either! But you don't see me asking for you to kill me!”
“It is all I ask of you.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because we just went through all of this, and we survived . I'm not ripping your life from you in victory. We already lost Peter earlier-”
“Guys.”
“- to kill you would just be a waste of all of our hard work-”
“Thanatos.”
“-don't you want to see the world you helped save-”
“Rumi. Stop.” Peter's words finally cut them off. “Stop fighting. Please.” They both stayed quiet. “Rumi won't kill you Thanatos, and neither will I. Death isn’t the right option here and you know it.” Rumi watched as Peter breathed. “If the only reason you did what you did was because you thought you could escape the guilt afterward- well it's not fair. The rest of us have to live with what we did. We will have to face it every day for the rest of our lives.” Rumi thought of all the damage Exandroth did, and how hard it was to separate Peter’s hands from Exandroth’s actions. “But there's more to this life than guilt and pain and suffering. It may be all you’ve lived for, but the rest of us live for much more.” Peter looked up at Rumi, just for a second. What had Rumi lived for before this? “You’re my friend Thanatos. And I don't want to see you hurt. But I’d rather see you as that than dead.”
“I cannot stay Peter. There isn't much left for me here.”
“But there's still something. Travel with us. I’m sure we’ll find something to do. I can show you my home- if it's still there- and teach you the difference between granite and limestone. I can show you Lizard’s enclosure…”
“That is not enough for me Peter. I am not made for a life of domesticity.”
“Then don't live that life,” Rumi cut in. “Explore, see who you can help, your purpose was to kill the gods, yes? But deep, deep down I think it was the same as mine wasn't it? To help people, to save this world from the evils of the gods, from their wrath.”
“I suppose so, yes.”
“Then continue that journey. Find hurting people and help them. Save humanity from the wraths of other evils, maybe even those of your own past. To cut your journey short here would be a disservice to the reason you were made, and even more to the person- or robot- you have become.”
“Perhaps you do not speak of a bad life Rumi. Is it one you yourself wish to lead?”
“It's one many versions of me have wanted to lead, yet none have yet to succeed at. If you succeed, you will be twice the person I have ever been.”
“And me.” Peter put in. “This is the biggest thing I have ever done in my life. And without you Thanatos, I would have never have made it this far. I can't let you leave knowing what else you could do.”
“I-I didn't know you felt that way.”
“Well you don't have a habit of listening you hunk of metal,” Rumi tried to make it light-hearted, but in their soul, they knew this was heartfelt. There was more to Thanatos than just this journey. They knew it, even if they hadn't seen it in a vision, they would have still known.
“What would you two do then, if I were to part ways?”
“We wouldn't come with you?” The crack in Peter's voice physically hurt Rumi.
“Peter, you died by my blade. I have caused you enough destruction, if I am to start this new life, this new path, I feel as though I must do it on my own. I fear I will not be able to let go of the god slayer if we do not part ways.”
“But- you’re my friend.”
“As you are mine, Peter. And you Rumi.”
“You are mine too, Thanny. I'm glad our words have finally been able to help you, truly”
“I thank you for continuing to speak them.”
It wasn't goodbye just yet, but it felt as if it was one. The true end of a journey between them, the rise of a new day, marking the end of their everlasting night of adventure.
“Let us come with you at least? Just back home. Wherever that is. We can say goodbye then. Let's just spend a day together. That's it.” Peter was squeezing Rumi’s hand tight now, and it hurt to see Peters's heart shatter just a little. They knew people were important to Peter, fuck, Peter cared about people more than most. It was something else Rumi loved about him.
“Very well. One last adventure would be satisfac- would be nice.” Rumi couldn't help but smile. As much as they had butted heads, Rumi would miss Thanatos’s temperament.
“For now let us take today as rest eh? I think we have more than earned it.” They got up, dropping Peter's hand only to stretch, welcoming their bones to the unadjusted heat. “As much as I love the nighttime, my body could do with some good warmth. Fancy a walk anyone?” Peter stood and stretched much the same. “Thanatos?”
“No, I shall stay here with Lizard and Sunny, I would like a few more minutes of rest”
“Very well, I think I saw some berries sprout just beyond the treeline, shall we have a look, Peter?” Rumi held out their hand, silently beckoning their favorite comfort. As if second nature Peter took their hand, clasping it securely. It had been a comfort to them on their long nights of travel, their hands in each other's. It was a whisper of something that one day might have been. And even now that everything was over, now that ‘what might have been’ became ‘was’, it acted much the same, as a constant in their ever-changing world.
The two walked hand in hand for a few minutes, Rumi watched a wide-eyed Peter as he took in the world around them. They wished they could see the world through Peter's eyes sometimes, wished they didn't have to search for the good in people; and instead saw it as a natural instinct, blocking everything else out. They wished they could see the beauty in the way the light bounced off the trees.
Instead, all they saw was every cracked branch and broken piece of bark.
“I can't believe I almost forgot what all of this looked like.”
“Did you go out into the forest much before all of this?”
Peter shook his head, “Not often no, I used to, with my old adventuring party, but once that all kind of ended… well I figured maybe the city life was more my style.”
“And was it?” There were a few minutes of silence, broken only by the unfamiliar ambiance of a forest breathing again.
“I do miss it sometimes. It was easier, but I don't know if I was happier. I wouldn't trade this for that. If that’s what you're asking.”
“I’m asking if you wanted to go back there after we drop Thanatos wherever he wants to go.”
“Is that what you want to do?”
“I'm not asking me, I'm asking you”
The smile that lit Peter’s face shone brighter than the sun ever had.
“Why are you asking me all these questions?” Wasn’t wanting to know enough?
“Because I promised, remember? Before anyone changed the world, after all of this was over we said we’d talk. This is talking isn't it?” They paused, “Plus, I want to know more about you. We've been traveling for weeks and I feel like I don't know anything about your life. I want to love all of you, not just some of you.”
There was silence for a few seconds as they continued to walk, and Rumi could feel Peter's eyes on them.
“I want to love all of you too.” It was nice to have that confirmation. That their love didn’t end with the rise of the sun. That they were going to try to develop this in the future.
“Now answer the question stupid, do you want to go home after this?”
“I would like to visit I think, just to see what it's like, see if I can find my parents- if they remember where I am- maybe pay some respects to Julius. I never got to do that. But I don't want to stay there. I don't know if that's the life I can really live anymore. Sorting rocks was fun, but I've seen so much more than just granite and slate out here. I'm not as scared of seeing the world as I used to be, I think.” When had Peter gotten so good at talking? He was putting even Rumi’s words to shame. “But most of all I want to do what you want to do.”
Rumi turned to look at Peter. Their eyes softened, they would never stop being thankful that they had managed to find each other, and both managed to survive. They stopped walking, right next to a small bush of what looked like freshly ripe berries. Rumi made quick work to cup Peter's face with the hand that wasn't already in his.
“That sounds perfect Peter.”
Rumi leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his lips. Something soft and sweet. Something they hadn't shared yet. It felt nice to be in contact with Peter again, and for the first time when they weren't battling against time, life, or a higher power.
This time it was just them and the wind. It was something Rumi hadn't known they’d missed until they’d tried it. They thought maybe they felt the same about kissing Peter as Peter felt about the rise of the sun. It was like getting something back that never should have left, something that defined the very way you lived your life. Peter was more of a driving force to Rumi than their visions ever were. At least that's what Rumi told themself.
“Really?” Peter's eyes were wide after breaking from the kiss, and Rumi could practically feel the other's heart beating against their own chest.
“Really.” They said, before popping a berry into their mouth. “Nothing would make me happier.” And for just a split second Rumi believed that after all of this, after the lives they’d lived and the lives they’d taken, maybe now, finally, with Peter, they could be happy.