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Rolling over to his other side, William tried to squeeze his eyes shut, burrowing himself underneath the covers like it would be the key to falling asleep. He curled his fingers around the raggedy quilt on top and pulled it up to his chin, practically shivering harder. Why could he not have one night of not shivering for hours before passing out?
William rolled onto his back, peeling his eyes open to stare up at the ceiling. He could see the faint glow from the fake stars stuck to his ceiling. They were from a cheap pack that he had bought randomly one day and had since been the subject of many nights’ sleepless counting. Fifty-seven. There were fifty-seven stars on his ceiling. He had the number memorized and could imagine the patterns in his head if he closed his eyes.
A yawn pulled itself out of his throat and a full-body shiver wracked his body. William thought about how nice it would be to be asleep at the moment. Then maybe he wouldn’t wake up in the morning exhausted and running on empty throughout the day. It would be nice. He continued to tremble.
Were there more blankets in the hallway closet? William couldn’t remember. Usually, there were but William also had a lot of blankets on his bed. He rolled back onto his side, hugging his knees to his chest. He should sleep, they had school in the morning. And yet, sleep absolutely refused to come.
His fingers were cold so he tucked them back underneath the blanket, pressing his nose into the fabric. They still smelled slightly dusty, the scent of old wood never leaving no matter how long they had been out of the linen closet. William couldn’t tell if he liked the smell or hated it, but he kept his face buried in the sheets in an attempt to warm himself.
He could hear the thudding of the air conditioning and the other idle sounds of the night. The clock on his nightstand stuttered and clicked, the old gears too finicky to hold the correct time. He didn’t use it for the time anyway, he just liked the look of it.
Besides the clock and the air conditioning, it was near silent in the base. And dark. And cold. Very cold.
William heaved a sigh, pushing himself up to a sitting position and bringing his hand up to rub at his face. He ran his fingers through his messy hair, staring down at his lap to avoid looking at anything else in the room. If he didn’t look, he wouldn’t be able to see the shadows, or the dark corner of his room where he really wished some sort of light would reach it.
He turned to the side, staring at the closed door of his bedroom. Pictures and other papers had been taped to the backside of the door, filling the already cluttered space. In the darkness, William was unable to see the contents of the photographs, but the sight reassured him.
Slowly, William pulled the quilt off his bed, wrapping it around his shoulders and pushing the rest of the blankets to the side. The chill that he had been trying to fight off this entire time came back for vengeance and William wasn’t so sure that he wanted to get out of bed anymore. But he sucked in a deep breath and shook his head. It was useless laying in bed when his body was insistent on not letting him sleep. He counted to three in his head before pushing off the bed, wobbling slightly as he stood.
The pants legs of his sweatpants had ridden up in his tossing and turning, so as William shuffled towards the door, he used his heel to push it back down. He tightened his grip around the quilt, tucking it closer around his shoulders.
Maybe getting something to drink would help. He could make some hot chocolate and go back to bed and then hopefully that would help him sleep. It would chase away some of the chills at least.
As he approached the door, William hesitated with his hand wrapped around the doorknob. His fingers dug into the cold metal as he traced his eyes over the photographs taped to the wood.
Cool scenery and architecture, pictures of Vyncent and Dakota, and different places that they had seen. William had taped up some pages from newspapers and magazines as well. Things that he wanted to remember and things that he would be able to look at when he needed to. He even had a bunch of sticky notes of hastily scrawled book quotes that he had taped up once the sticky part got too dirty to stick.
William huffed out a small breathy laugh, pulled the door open as quietly as possible, and slipped into the hallway. His footsteps were near silent as he crept through the base towards the kitchen. He didn’t need to turn on any lights since his eyes were adjusted enough to see.
The floor was cold underneath his feet even with his socks on and William shivered. The worn-out quilt around his shoulders barely gave him any warmth, but he liked the comfort anyways. It smelled familiar.
As he approached the kitchen, William shuffled through the cabinets trying to find a mug and some hot chocolate. They usually had some of the packets stocked up, but William couldn’t remember the last time they bought more.
Using one hand to keep the quilt wrapped around his shoulder, William leaned against the counter, pulling open the next cabinet and squinting at the contents. Some cups and plates, no mugs. Maybe he could just use a regular cup. That seemed like a bad idea. Most of the cups were plastic since neither William nor Dakota could be trusted handling fragile equipment.
So that meant he needed to find the mugs. William shuffled around the kitchen, his socks sliding against the floor. The next cabinet yielded the box of hot chocolate packets, which he pulled down to rifle through. He pulled out two packets and shook them just for the sake of it. They had marshmallows in it. William liked those the best.
Just as he moved on from finding the hot chocolate, William heard footsteps from the hallway. He froze instantly, stopping in place as he tried to hear who would be approaching.
His heart hammered loudly in his chest. The last thing that he had wanted was to wake someone up. The others didn’t need to deal with his inability to sleep, that was for William and William alone to deal with. He just wanted to get some hot chocolate and go back to bed, hopefully significantly warmer than he was before. He’d even take the mug to his bedroom and snuggle back in bed to hopefully tire himself out.
He waited, frozen like a deer in the headlights, barely breathing so as to not make a sound. For a moment, the base was silent again. But then, the footsteps resumed, approaching the kitchen and William could feel his heart drop. Even as he tried to go invisible, he knew that the open cabinets and hot chocolate packets on the counter were a good enough giveaway. Worth a shot.
There was no time to try and retreat back to his room. William held his breath as the footsteps got louder. Then, William could see Dakota round the corner, red hair messy and sticking up in every which way. He rubbed his eyes, a loose tank top hanging off his shoulders as he yawned, looking exhausted.
“Hey, Will,” he mumbled, voice groggy and slightly hoarse from lack of use. William internally cursed, sheepishly flickering visible again. Dakota yawned, swaying on his feet.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” William whispered, curling the quilt around himself tighter, he looked away from Dakota, glancing at the counter towards the hot chocolate packets.
For a moment, he recognized how strange this situation was. William hadn’t turned on any lights since he trusted his eyes in the darkness. So he was just standing in the middle of the kitchen, bundled in a quilt and making hot chocolate in pitch darkness. He had tried to be quiet about it too.
“You didn’t wake me,” Dakota said, another yawn spilling from his lips, he looked practically dead on his feet, “thirsty.”
“Oh,” William licked his lips, rocking back and forth in an idle movement, “I’m uh… I’m making hot chocolate… Do you want some?”
“Sure,” Dakota stepped further into the kitchen. William suddenly felt a little awkward standing there, so he went to get another two packs of hot chocolate. Since it always tasted better with two packets of the powder mixed in. He realized that he still hadn’t found the mugs.
William turned around to resume his search slightly more frantically when he nearly bumped into Dakota who stood a few feet behind him. His eyes widened and he stepped back a few paces. It took him a few seconds to realize that Dakota was handing something to him. And it took him another few seconds to notice that he had a mug gripped in each hand, extended out to William.
“Here,” Dakota said, blinking slowly as William stared at the offered cups. William noticed the open cabinet behind Dakota but barely paid any mind to it.
He gingerly took the cups, focusing very hard on actually keeping them in his hands. William had broken far too many mugs far too many times. These were the only things that couldn’t really be switched out for something unbreakable, at least not like the cups and plates could.
William sat them down on the counter, the quilt almost slipping off his shoulders which he quickly pulled back tightly in place.
“Why are you up?” Dakota asked, pushing himself up to sit on the counter as he watched tiredly, “I don’t think I asked.”
“Oh…” William shuffled towards the fridge, using both hands to grab the gallon of milk, “uh… I…” he licked his lips and unscrewed the cap.
“I couldn’t sleep,” William finished quietly, filling each mug with a good amount of milk, “I uh… I thought hot chocolate would help.”
“Ah,” Dakota let out a slow breath and leaned his head against the cabinet behind him, “I see.”
“Why are you awake?” William parroted, noticing the way his hands were shaking as he shoved the milk back in the fridge. This moment suddenly felt all the rawer now that someone was watching him. William crumbled slightly under Dakota’s gaze, even if he knew that Dakota wouldn’t care.
“Dunno, thirsty I guess,” Dakota shrugged, “I forgot to get a cup of water before bed.”
William made a noise from the back of his throat, easing the mug into the microwave before setting the timer for thirty seconds. He didn’t want to make it too hot and he could always put it in for longer if he needed.
The light from the microwave was the only thing that illuminated the kitchen, making William squint at the sudden light. He shuffled awkwardly from foot to foot, listening to the methodical whirring sound.
Besides that, a silence stretched between the two of them. William looked over his shoulder at Dakota, his head drooping forward as he seemed to struggle not to fall back asleep. Maybe he should have let Dakota get his cup of water and go back to bed instead of offering him some hot chocolate. But maybe that would have been rude as well.
There was no winning in this social situation. The microwave beeped and William jumped, Dakota looked up suddenly, his eyes wide.
William pulled it out and stared at the rim of the mug to try and find the lick of steam. When he decided that it wasn’t hot enough, he put it back in the microwave for a little bit longer.
“At the store the other day,” Dakota said suddenly, breaking the silence and pulling William out of his thoughts, “there were these marshmallows shaped like stars and stuff like that. They looked good but I didn’t think you or Vyncent would like them so I didn’t get them.”
William looked over his shoulder, chewing on the inside of his mouth, a small smile crossing his lips, “you should have gotten them.”
“I know,” Dakota leaned his head back once more, the door of the cabinet thunking slightly, “I should have. Next time I will.”
Letting the silence stretch between them once more, William pulled the mug out of the microwave, a small bit of steam rising from the surface. He set it down on the counter and placed the other mug in the microwave for the same amount of time.
Methodically, William tore open the first packet of hot chocolate mix, using a spoon to stir it completely. He stared intensely at the chocolate swirls, willing his hands to stop shaking. But they refused. He shivered, the warmth of the mug in his hand barely doing anything to chase away the chill that surrounded him.
He poured the second pack of hot chocolate mix in and stirred it in the same way, the little marshmallows bobbing to the surface and spinning around as he mixed. The spoon clinked against the edge of the ceramic mug, giving a satisfying sound that seemed to echo in the kitchen.
“Here,” William turned, using one hand to readjust the blanket around his shoulders. He handed the steaming mug to Dakota, the spoon still resting in the liquid.
Dakota blinked, yawning once more as he gingerly took the mug from William, holding it in both of his hands. William pulled the next mug out of the microwave, making himself a cup of hot chocolate with the remaining two packets that he had pulled out of the cabinet.
“I like the way you make hot chocolate,” Dakota said quietly, blowing on the surface of the liquid and taking a small sip.
“It’s not any different than how you make it,” William pointed out shly, dropping his spoon in the sink and leaning against the counter. He pressed his fingers around the mug as tightly as he could, trying to soak in as much warmth as possible. But still, he shivered.
Dakota made a noise in the back of his throat, conveying his disagreement, “you make it better. It tastes sweeter.”
That was probably because William used two packets of the mix. Definitely a lot more chocolate than only using one. But he liked the sweetness. He would put three if he wasn’t so concerned about wasting the food.
“Do you… wanna go sit in the living room?” William offered, shuffling awkwardly. He had wanted to go back to his room and hope that this helped chase the chill away. But with Dakota here, leaving all of the sudden felt almost impolite. Not when Dakota decided to sit with him this long.
“Sure,” Dakota hopped off the counter, a small bit of hot chocolate slipping down the edge of his mug. He yawned again and ran his fingers through his hair.
William led the way, Dakota trailing behind him. They settled on the couch in the living room, plush cushions sinking with their weight. William tugged the quilt around his shoulders tighter, a small sigh spilling from his lips as he relaxed. He took a sip of his hot chocolate, trying to focus on that more than the situation he currently found himself in.
“Movie?” Dakota offered, reaching forward and plucking the remote off of the coffee table.
“It’s the middle of the night,” William tried to protest, feeling his voice crack in the middle of the sentence.
“So?” Dakota looked at him with that same tired expression. But he smiled softly, “noise helps me fall asleep.”
Oh, right. Sleeping. That’s what they were supposed to be doing. Definitely what Dakota was supposed to be doing right about now. William was supposed to be trying to get himself to fall asleep but would probably end up failing that task anyway.
“Oh…” William licked his lips, hiding his expression behind the mug of hot chocolate, “sure then.”
Dakota leaned against the armrest of the couch, throwing his legs over William’s lap as he got comfortable. He let the mug of hot chocolate rest in one hand over his lap, his other hand clutching the remote. He clicked the tv on, quickly turning the volume down as some random late at night tv show began to play.
The three of them had watched a movie just the other night, so there was still something in the DVD player. Dakota switched to that and put it on. It was just some random movie that they had found at the bottom of the DVD box and decided to watch. It wasn’t like either of them were very good at paying attention during movie nights. Even though William had seen the movie just the other day, he wouldn’t be able to give a summary of what it was about.
Dakota turned the volume down a little more so that they didn’t disturb anyone else in the base. The lights flashed across the screen, illuminating the room in a wash of colors and pictures. William took another sip of his hot chocolate, feeling the warmth slide down his throat.
William sank further against the couch cushions, relishing in the comfort but still slightly disgruntled at the chill that wracked his body. All he asked was for one moment of warmth. One moment where he wasn’t shivering all the time. Just one moment of that so he could fall asleep.
Even though Dakota practically radiated warmth, not even that was enough. He ran slightly hotter than normal, his skin always warm to the touch. And even now he was warm, slumped against the armrest of the couch, drinking his hot chocolate tiredly.
Tiredly, William traced his eyes over the scene of the movie, watching the characters through a half-lidded gaze. He was truly so incredibly tired. He wanted to sleep, he wanted to stop shivering.
The hot chocolate helped only slightly. The warmth filled him for a few moments before it was gone. It was beginning to cool as well and soon it would be no more helpful than a glass of slightly room temperature milk. William would drink it before then, though.
William yawned, rubbing his eyes with his other hand, bringing the corner of his quilt up to hide his face. He could feel Dakota glance over at him before his attention turned back to the TV. The mug of hot chocolate swished slightly as Dakota shifted.
A few minutes passed and William was just as tired but no closer to falling asleep. Dakota was nearly conked out though, his breathing evening out. He wasn’t out yet. But close. Very close. His eyes were still peeked open as he stared at the TV, the empty mug hanging off the edge of the couch in one hand.
William had finished his hot chocolate as well, leaning forward enough to set it on the coffee table. He jostled Dakota slightly who shifted with a yawn and settled back against the couch.
The sound of another pair of footsteps caused William to jump, turning to face the large entranceway to the living room. He visibly tensed, his hand curling around Dakota’s ankle from where it had just been casually resting. The footsteps were uneven and choppy like the person was trying to be stealthy but not too much.
They approached quickly, the form of Vyncent immediately filling the doorway. He looked surprised as he noticed both William and Dakota sitting on the couch with a movie quietly playing. William had a hard time reading the look on his face as his ear idly flicked in the direction of the noise.
“Hey,” William mumbled, catching his attention. Vyncent pried his gaze away from the TV to glance at William’s face. The light from the screen provided enough light to see practically the whole room. Vyncent’s eyes were glowing slightly, and William was only able to notice since he had gotten used to noticing it.
There was something far off in Vyncent’s expression. Like he wasn’t fully there. He was shaking minutely, his shoulders trembling.
For a while, neither of them moved, Vyncent stared at William intensely. William stared back, not as intense, mostly tired. He was very exhausted. But he was also slightly concerned.
Dakota was oblivious and mostly asleep.
Vyncent was the first one to break the spell, taking a cautious step forward, ears drooping, “why are you…” he swallowed thickly, his breathing was uneven, “why are you two… uh…”
He blinked, mouth opening and closing as he tried to come up with the right words. He seemed to give up after a few seconds and gestured to the TV.
William chewed on the inside of his mouth, picking at the hem of his quilt. “I couldn’t sleep…” he said, not seeing any point in lying to Vyncent, “Dakota was awake too.”
The answer was lackluster at best. It explained pretty much everything and nothing at the same time. Vyncent continued to stare at him and William didn’t like the way he looked slightly rattled. Like he had been put in a jar and shaken.
“Do you want to sit?” William then asked hesitantly, his voice quieter than before. Vyncent blinked, pulling himself out of the slight stupor.
“Okay,” he practically mouthed, moving forward towards the couch. He sucked in a sharp breath, sitting down next to William who shuffled to make room. Dakota still hadn’t noticed the addition of the third member of their group. William figured he was passed out by now.
Despite the fact that Vyncent was warm, his skin radiating an odd sort of heat, he was shivering. William swallowed thickly, pulling back the corner of his quilt and wrapping it around Vyncent’s shoulders as well as his own. Vyncent barely reacted, leaning closer to William.
“What are you watching?” he asked slowly, letting out a sharp exhale.
“The movie we watched the other night,” William explained, “Dakota just put it on.”
“Oh.”
Vyncent stared at the tv screen. William wished that he had woken up a bit sooner so that he could’ve made him a mug of hot chocolate. He still could, technically, there was no wrong time for hot chocolate. But Dakota had his legs sprawled over William’s lap, effectively trapping him in place for now. He would have been unable to get up to make Vyncent a mug of hot chocolate.
He looked like he needed one. But William had no idea how to approach those kinds of things. He had just wanted to get some hot chocolate and go back to bed, he hadn’t planned for any of this to happen.
But he was here now. William leaned against Vyncent’s side, almost surprised when Vyncent accepted the contact, resting his head on top of William’s. A small sigh spilled from his lips as he practically deflated, curling his fingers around the edge of William’s quilt. It really was a nice quilt, even with how worn out and old it was. It served its purpose well.
Dakota was warm and so was Vyncent. The blanket around his shoulders served as a nice comfort as well. William was almost surprised. It was nice to sit with the two of them comfortably. He was tired, exhausted even and the weight of that was finally catching up to him.
Vyncent absently fidgeted with the hem of his shirt, his breaths puffing in and out slowly and methodically. William wanted to ask him about it, but a part of him felt like that might be inappropriate. So he remained quiet, gaze turning to the TV screen.
The movie was quiet but even so, the base was even quieter. The sounds filled the room, lights flickering and flashing different colors across the three of their forms.
William leaned his head on Vyncent’s shoulder and Vyncent pressed himself just as close. It was surprisingly comfortable.
And with almost a start, William realized the chill had settled. He wasn’t super warm. But the shivering had subsided. A small smile crossed his face, spreading across his lips.
The unsaid ‘goodnight’ hung in the air. They didn’t need to say it. They weren’t technically trying to go to bed. The movie playing on the TV was supposed to be the focus, but that hadn’t really been the full intent.
William found that his eyelids were becoming heavier and heavier, making it harder for him to reopen them each time. He yawned, another sigh spilling from his lips. Vyncent relaxed against his side, breathing finally evening out.
Within minutes, William felt himself succumbing to sleep, the very thing that had evaded him for hours coming easily now. He yawned once more, sinking against Vyncent and the couch cushions, relishing in the contact and the warmth from both of them. It was nice. It felt really nice. He was a little glad that Dakota had woken up when he had.