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When Valentines Day and White Day roll around, the parades of chocolate sellers and bakeries rise to the front of every shopping center. To many, they’re baited in and instantly begin to ravage and splurge on the best chocolate or sweet treats money can buy. For as long as Izuku could remember, he’s never been a fan of the holiday.
When he was younger, his dislike for the holidays stem from fake confessions and never receiving chocolates from classmates, even when the whole class was obligated to. He understood that. No one wanted to be affectionate or kind to the poor, quirkless boy. Izuku was fine with that. After a few years, Izuku didn’t let it get to him. No longer would Izuku show up to get laughed at in front of a crowd, with a girl screaming, “How could I ever like someone like you?” It was that reaction or it was showing up to an empty field, knowing no one would be showing up.
It was fine like that. He had no friends and no interest in exchanging sweet treats and the like.
Though he’s not disgusted with the holiday. He does think it’s sweet. Izuku likes the idea of loving a person and deciding that they should be given something as sweet as their partner views them as. Or even spoiling a partner with delectable sweets because they enjoy each other that much. Izuku could never hate that. He just hates his own individual treatment when the time rolls around. That, and the barrage of stalls and stands of those sickening candies.
He knows exactly when this started, or rather, why he has such connotations.
It started with his mother. After his father left both him and his mother, the stress of being a single mother of a quirkless child caused her into a deep state of despair and stress. Between overworking herself to pay the bills and taking care of her son single-handedly, her food intake increased while the nutritional value decreased. What was once a slim woman turned into a more portly, chubby woman.
Not that she was to blame for that. It was a stressful time for her, and it would be for anyone who fell into the same situation. However, later on, when she realized what she had become, she started trying diets and exercise routines. From early on in Izuku’s life, he was well-acquainted with low-carb and less-sugar meals. He was okay with that too. If it was making his mother’s life better, then he had no place to argue with it.
While Inko juggled everything in her arms, she didn’t exactly notice that her self-view was starting to affect her son. What replaced standard bread rolls were salad bowls with little dressing and no croutons. And when Inko found herself slipping from her diet and seeing her weight increase, she would reprimand herself and provide even healthier foods.
She didn’t realize how this was affecting Izuku. Izuku, who had been with her every step of the way, had to hear the critique of her body and instantly began to view extra weight as bad.
To an impressionable child with chubby cheeks and hands, he began to think something was wrong with him. While Inko strived to provide for them both, she didn’t realize how her son was essentially on a grown adult’s weight-loss diet.
Growing up like this made Izuku hate his body. Every time he was able to feel his fingertips pinch his skin, he felt dirty. He felt even more worthless than how the kids would taunt him.
When All Might had come in and given Izuku the American Dream plan, he was startled by the calorie count, wondering how a body could intake this much and still be healthy. It went against everything he grew up with and made Izuku’s inside turn with disgust.
Nevertheless, he did what he was told. It was essential that he consumed that much or else he’d never grow the muscles and never get to receive One For All. Even as his stomach rolled into his throat, he kept his food down so he could get to his goal. There was no room for error. He needed this.
Time went on and the plan was going great. He was building muscle and the beach was getting clearer. There was even an actual spot where he could stand without the risk of tetanus or other various infections. What was once a garbage dump for everyone in the area was slowly turning into a recreational beach that serves the public. Izuku could see himself coming here in the future for leisure and enjoyment to enjoy the view the beach provided. He was enjoying this. It was one of those extra productive days that All Might was around to supervise Izuku the man asked if Izuku wanted to tour around town to find something to eat.
At first, Izuku was excited about spending time with his idol. But then it was about food as All Might spouted options of overly fried foods and desserts from stands among the street. Ever since he was nine, Izuku hadn’t dared touch a dessert and avoided fried foods as often as he could. Even his beloved Katsudon became something Izuku began to resent due to its fried, unhealthy nature.
“Uh, All Might?”
“Yes, my boy? Ah, forgive me, I must be rambling about random foods. I haven’t gotten the chance to try many restaurants around here, yet.”
Izuku shook his head. He wasn’t going to hold the rambling against All Might. Everyone knows of Izuku’s habit to mutter and ramble with seemingly no end until someone or something interrupted him. “I, uh, isn’t it against the American Dream plan to eat that stuff?”
“I’ll allow it! Everyone should be allowed a cheat day or two, as long as you don’t make it a habit! Besides, you’ve been doing enough, more than enough, my boy!” Izuku felt proud and light every time All Might called him his boy. After so long of having no father figure in his life, he was embarrassed to admit that All Might was steadily beginning to fill that void. “Also, I know we’ve had that talk about overwork too.” With a clap from All Might’s large hands, he continued, “There’s nothing to worry about. It’s my treat, too!”
Bewildered and somewhat swayed by All Might’s words and generosity, he nodded his head. Throughout their journey of passing numerous stalls, Izuku let All Might have the choice of picking what they ate. Izuku knew from research that having no stomach meant All Might had to eat quite often in small amounts to stay healthy. Izuku wasn’t picky by any means anyway. He’s just a bit cautious about the calorie intake and the amount of batter there was on everything.
Somewhere along the line of Izuku's training with All Might did he realize that he had a sort of food-related disorder. Not in the way of digesting it, but in the way he interacts with food. He wouldn’t go so far as say he had an eating disorder because Izuku is certain that’s not the case. He just wouldn’t want to eat some food, and he was fine with that. It wasn’t harming him in any way. He was healthy and almost finished cleaning the beach.
He wasn’t in danger, and that’s what mattered.
Inko noticed the diet change with Izuku; how could she not? She knew buying the foods he was asking for would tempt her, but she knew Izuku had some sort of plan for this kind of diet to be needed. She would’ve refused to buy any of this had it been anything sweet or dessert-like. She couldn’t handle having that sort of temptation around her, especially now. She’s been finding herself binging and caving around combinis and convenience stores to buy whatever her heart was desiring. That in itself was already beginning to hurt her waistline; she just knew it.
Inko knew that being a quirkless teenager was stressful. She wasn’t blind. She knew about the depression and suicide statistics too. She was worried for her son all the time. She could only hope she was doing enough as a parent to keep him safe. However, seeing him get invested as of late and change his diet plan was intriguing. But when she started seeing him bulk up, she began to worry. She worried that he was falling on the same path she was and gaining weight due to stress among other factors.
She didn’t mean him any harm, only concern for his well-being when she mentioned how he was gaining some weight. She mentioned that she was concerned for him and asked how his school life was.
What she didn’t expect was for her son to give a surprised face and shut down after her questions, eyes going blank as he curled into himself at the kitchen table.
She didn’t realize how much her words hurt.
After the fight against All For One, All Might’s retirement, and Kacchan’s kidnapping, everyone was moved into the dorms. Izuku, after getting reluctant permission from his mother, was granted to live with his classmates 24-7. While he was expecting a large adjustment period of getting used to so many classmates and personalities living under the same roof, he wasn’t expecting there to be so many food arguments surrounding him.
One day, there was a cry for strawberry mochi that was easily deflected by another cry for matcha mochi, both claiming it was the superior mochi. Easily, it brought in the opinions of every surrounding classmate, interjecting their own opinions on the best-tasting mochi. Each time, Izuku could only remain silent, the last time he had mochi being when he was six. He couldn’t remember his opinions about it.
Before he left, his mother warned him not to eat what the other kids could be offering him. Oftentimes, she mentioned, kids didn’t eat the healthiest things, and she didn’t want Izuku to gain bad eating habits and be unhealthy with no parents around.
Because of this, Izuku strayed away from Sato’s relentless cake tastings and offers of cookies and meringues. He also refused to get involved in arguments over which ramen flavor was the best.
Despite it all, Izuku never was inclined to eat what his friends ate in the dorms. He was scared his mother would find out. Or worse, he was afraid of screwing with his health and having to give up his dream. He was going to stick to the outlined plan All Might gave him.
On a weekly video call with his mother, they were talking about his schedule and how he was doing. The conversation was easy. He was talking about how wonderful his friends were and how fun it was to live with them. It wasn’t until his mother said, “Izuku, honey, have you been eating junk? Your face looks a bit rounder from the last time I saw you,” that he froze where he sat, looking into his phone’s camera reflection displayed on the screen. Had he been letting himself go? Did he really look bigger? Had he done something wrong?
Not long after, he excused himself from the call, claiming he had homework to complete only to find himself in the dorm’s bathroom. Staring down at the tile, he stood next to the scale. He would have to step on to find out if he had really gained weight. He hadn’t strayed from his diet plan, so maybe it was his exercise. As the metal shifted under his weight, calculating, Izuku held his breath.
When the number appeared on the dash, Izuku cringed. From the last time he weighed himself, about a month ago, he was 3 kilos lighter. While any of that could’ve been attributed to muscle mass, Izuku’s mind instantly leaped to him failing his diet plan.
He came to the conclusion that he needed to lose weight. He felt so disgusted with himself. How could he have messed up like this, and think he was doing well of all things? The better question was how he was going to fix it and quickly, too.
He concluded to eat fewer calories. It was a simple and easier plan. He was already doing an extreme amount of exercise, so he didn’t need to work on finding something that will get him to slim down. Maybe, in addition to lessening his caloric intake, he could increase a bit of his training to kick off that start of his weight gain. Yeah, that’d be good.
Later that day, when he came together with his class to eat dinner, he wasn’t hungry. His thoughts kept swirling around how much he was eating and how much he didn’t deserve it. He needed to lose this weight. He was worthless if he couldn’t adhere to All Might’s directions and his mother’s image. He couldn’t just eat this like a fat-ass.
“Deku? What’s up? You aren’t eating,” Uraraka chided.
“Ah, um, I’m not hungry,” he explained.
“Oh, well, you know you can wrap it up for later and come back to it later tonight,” Uraraka suggested, picking up her clear plate from the table.
Izuku nodded, “I think that’s what I’ll do.” He wasn’t going to come back to it. He certainly wasn’t up to it.
That’s when the lies started rushing in. Whether it was that he wasn’t hungry or had already had a large snack before dinner time, there was always some excuse in place.
Oftentimes, Izuku couldn’t stand to be around the kitchen so much anymore. Every time, he felt himself gag, thinking that this food is what caused him to be such a failure.
He knew his classmates were getting worried. At school, he spent most of his time at lunch trying to get homework done in the library or bathrooms. He couldn’t be in the cafeteria. He couldn’t be around so much food. He’d already caused enough damage to his body. He couldn’t let himself fail again.
What he didn’t know was the number of plates reserved for him in the refrigerator in the dorm room kitchen. After each meal he didn’t attend to, there was always a plate ready to serve him that was packaged for him to reheat when he got the chance. All clearly marked with his name, wrapped in saran wrap or a container with a sticky note on top was his food. However, every day, those plates would go untouched.
By the time his next call with his mother came up, she instantly mentioned how much better he was looking. She told him how proud she was of him. Izuku couldn’t help but smile. Not eating as much felt great.
With all the praise he got for losing weight and with no side effects, he couldn’t help but want to continue. He could get even smaller and his mother could be even prouder. After supporting him so much for all of his life, this was the least he could do. It’d make him feel better too. Even with all the muscles on his body, he always felt a bit too big. With this, he could once again be in a small body and make his mother proud of him.
It’s all he could ever want. To be a hero with a slim body. This is what he needed now, and he’d do anything he could to achieve it.
So, the lies piled on and the pounds dropped away. He was proud and so was his mother.
Whatever the case was, he didn’t account for the upcoming consequences. Even then, it didn’t deter Izuku from seeking out even less food. How could he stop when all he was receiving was support and praise from the person who gives him unconditional support?
