Chapter Text
“Have more than thou showest,
Speak less than thou knowest,
Lend less than thou owest…”
Judith’s reading aloud was cut off by a clatter. She looked up to find that Claude had dropped his pen and was flexing his fingers, wincing. Quickly, though, he met her eyes and turned his wince into a smile. “Sorry, Judith. I’m just a little sore, nothing to worry about. I must’ve slept wrong.”
“I see.” Judith sat back, contemplative. Claude did seem off today; they’d only been at their lessons for an hour, and he’d already made a number of uncharacteristic mistakes. Over the past several moons, their lessons had become a part of their daily routines, and Judith knew his capabilities well. He’d definitely improved in his language skills by leaps and bounds - having only ever spoken Fodlani with his mother, his abilities had been lacking when he arrived from Almyra. Since his origin was to be kept closely under wraps, hiring a tutor was out of the question. Therefore, at Oswald’s behest, the task fell to Judith to bring the boy up to speed. Claude was undeniably very bright, and picked up new vocabulary and speech patterns quickly. His spoken skills had since been deemed satisfactory by his grandfather. His reading comprehension had advanced very quickly as well. All that was left now was writing, which understandably didn’t come as easily, what with a completely different script than he was used to. Lately, their lessons consisted mostly of Judith reading classic literature aloud for Claude to transcribe. He had been making steady progress in his writing skills and was expected to be proficient by the time he started at the Garreg Mach Officer’s Academy in the spring. His performance today, though, had been a step backwards. Maybe he needed a break. “Well, would you like to do something else? Maybe do some reading on your own?”
Claude nodded. “Sure, I’m always up for some reading.” He certainly didn’t need reading lessons anymore, judging by the small library that his room had become, but he seemed to be having a rough day. Maybe doing something he liked would help rejuvenate him.
“All right,” Judith passed him the book. “I have some other business to attend to, but you should be able to finish this by the time I get back.” She didn’t really, but Claude obviously wasn’t feeling himself. A break would be good for him.
“You know me, I’ll probably be finished with this one and onto the next!” Claude smiled again, but the smile didn’t have his usual exuberance behind it.
“Oh, I have no doubt,” Judith replied with a smile of her own, choosing not to bring up her observations. Everyone had their off days. “I’ll be back around dinnertime, okay?” And with that, she was off. She could go take a walk, and perhaps even get some training in. It was a lovely autumn day, after all.
When Judith returned a few hours later, though, Claude had not finished the book. Not even close - he appeared to have only made it a few pages further before he’d fallen asleep at the table, his head buried in his arms. That wasn’t like Claude at all. Concerned, Judith put a hand on his shoulder and shook him lightly. “You alright there, boy?” Claude took a deep breath in and shifted, lifting his head off his arms. He didn’t look well, Judith noted with concern. He was markedly more flushed than he had been just a few hours ago, and a faint sheen of sweat stood out on his face. It took longer than it should have for him to gain his bearings, looking around and then blinking up at Judith blearily. “Hey,” she said gently, “You’re not looking so good.” Judith lifted her hand from his shoulder and moved it to his forehead, not entirely surprised at this point to find that it was much too warm. “Yeah, looks like you’ve got a fever. How are you feeling?”
Claude seemed to shrink in on himself, hunching his shoulders and ducking his head down, not meeting Judith’s eyes anymore. He did not answer.
Judith frowned, concern growing. She’d never seen this kind of meek behavior from her typically outgoing and talkative charge. He must be feeling pretty bad for him to be acting this way. “Come on, why don’t we get back to your room so you can lie down?”
Still no answer, not even a nod. Judith ducked down a bit to try to look him in the face and he quickly turned his head away yet again. It was as if he didn’t want to engage at all. Was he even listening to her? Experimentally, Judith tugged at his elbow a bit and was heartened to see that he did at least respond to her prompting and stood slowly. His gaze was still cast down, though, and he wrapped his arms around himself. Poor thing. He was really out of sorts. “That’s it,” she said softly, putting an arm around him and leading him from the room. “Let’s go.”
The walk back to Claude’s room was slow, and by the time they reached their destination, it was evident that just that small amount of activity had been too much for him. He swayed where he stood as Judith opened the door before ushering him inside. The boy obviously wasn’t in a state to take care of himself properly, so Judith sat him down on the edge of his bed and began removing his boots for him, as one might do with a small child. Still, there was no sort of reaction from Claude. He just sat there and stared down at his lap. It was almost unnerving. Judith proceeded to remove his outer layers until he was just down to his shirt and trousers, then gently prompted him to lie down. He did, and showed some kind of initiative for the first time by tugging the covers up around him as he curled up. The reason quickly became apparent: despite the warm early fall weather, he was shivering. That didn’t bode well. “I’m going to get a healer, all right?” No response. Wasting no time, Judith quickly left the room to fetch someone who could help.
***
The healer’s diagnosis was an unexpected one: Claude had rigid fever, a common illness in Fodlan that typically only affected very young children. It made its rounds every few years and was very rarely fatal; in fact, it was customary for parents to knowingly expose their children to others who were infected to “get it over with.” Once you caught it, you couldn’t catch it again. Therefore, the fact that Claude was just now coming down with it at the age of seventeen was what made it so unexpected. Oswald was not pleased, since this was a telltale sign that Claude had not grown up in Fodlan. This couldn’t get out, he insisted. The healer that Judith had fetched was paid a hefty sum of hush money and offered - forced into, really, but no one said as much aloud - permanent employment at the Riegan estate.
Now, all there was to do was wait for Claude to recover. Rigid fever didn’t require intensive care, just a week or so for it to work through the system. That didn’t mean it was a walk in the park, though; the illness brought with it fever and painful muscle cramps in the extremities, hence the name. Claude would be in for a miserable time, but since this wasn’t really Judith’s area of expertise, there wouldn’t be much for her to do until he was better.
Or so she thought.
Two days after Claude took ill, Judith was surprised by a knock at her door as she was getting ready for bed. She opened it to reveal the healer, wringing his hands nervously. “Yes?” She asked.
“Ah, Lady Judith, I was wondering if - well, I came to ask for your -”
“Spit it out,” Judith said, not unkindly. “What do you need? Is Claude all right?”
The man let out a breath and then babbled out his predicament. “He- he’s got a knife, I don’t know where it came from, and he can’t be reasoned with, he’s going to hurt himself, I can’t get it away from him-”
“He what?” Judith was already pushing her way past the healer and rushing down the hall towards Claude’s chambers, bursting through the doors and then hurrying through the sitting room to his bedchamber. Sure enough, she found Claude curled in the fetal position in bed, eyes wild and chest heaving, clutching a slim dagger in one hand. He seemed to be oblivious to the fact that his grip had slipped to where he was now holding the dagger partially by the blade. Blood was dripping down his arm. Judith swore. Quickly, she called on reflexes honed through battle and reached across the bed to snatch the boy’s wrist, squeezing in just the right spot for him to involuntarily release what he was holding. Disconcertingly, though, the knife remained steadfastly in his grip. The rigid fever must have made his arm cramp up, Judith realized. She was going to have to figure out another way to get him to let go of it.
Just then, the healer reentered the room, and the effect that this development had on Claude was immediate. He seemed unable to fully sit up, but somehow maneuvered himself into a more defensive position, breath picking up even further in evident panic. Judith turned to the healer. “What did you do?”
“N-nothing, his fever was getting a bit high so I just tried to give him some medicine-”
Judith sighed. “Out,” she snapped. “I’ll handle this.” The man quickly retreated and shut the door. Judith looked down at her charge, thinking. Tiana’s letters had always been vague, lest they be intercepted by the wrong parties, but one of the things that Judith had been able to piece together was the fact that Claude had survived multiple poisoning attempts throughout his childhood. Him reacting poorly to being given medicine in his state was likely warranted, she reasoned. Nevermind where the dagger had come from (though she suspected it had been under his pillow), it needed to be taken away before Claude caused more harm to himself and without agitating him further.
“Hey,” Judith said gently, trying to get Claude’s attention. He didn’t respond, eyes still fixed on the door. Judith moved a bit to try to get into his field of vision, but just as he had several days before in the study, as soon as he realized her attention was on him, he ducked his head and averted his eyes. What was going on with him? As soon as he got sick, it was like a switch had been flipped and he was a completely different person. “Claude? Can you hear me?” Still no direct response, however his panic seemed to be lessening. His body uncoiled a bit and his breath started to come more slowly and evenly, but he was still holding his arm awkwardly, unable to let go of the knife. Gingerly so as not to spook him, Judith pulled one leg up underneath her and sat on the edge of the bed. “Why don’t we see if we can get your hand all fixed up, yeah?” Slowly, she reached out and placed her hand on Claude’s arm, this time midway between his wrist and elbow. She winced - she could feel that the muscles there were painfully clenched. Maybe she could try to get them to release? She squeezed Claude’s arm gently. He sucked in a breath, but didn’t try to shake her off. That was encouraging.
Growing more confident, Judith scooted closer and brought her other hand to Claude’s arm, paying no attention to the blood smeared along it. She started to massage the limb rhythmically, trying to get the muscles to unclench. It must have felt good - Claude gave a shuddering sigh and the tension left his face. After a few minutes, the muscles abruptly released and the knife fell to the bed, finally free of Claude’s grip. Quickly, Judith snatched it away and tossed it out of reach. Though he still didn’t say anything, now that the cramp had subsided, Claude was obviously relieved. His whole body started to relax, sinking into the bed, his head falling to the pillow. He still needed to be patched up, though. The healer’s bag was sitting nearby, so Judith fetched a bandage from it and began to wind it around his hand. It was enough of a stopgap for now, until she could be sure the boy was calm enough to call the healer back in. “That’s it,” Judith found herself saying soothingly, “you’ll be alright, little fawn.”
Oops. Judith gritted her teeth. Tiana always referred to Claude as her little fawn in letters - using his name was too dangerous. Judith wasn’t one to use pet names, but Claude just seemed so… pathetic and in need of care right now, it just slipped out. What she was not expecting was for those green eyes of his, so much like his mother’s, to abruptly kindle with recognition and snap to her face. He was looking at her, really looking at her, for the first time during this whole ordeal. He was actually engaging with Judith, however silently. “There you are,” she said, smiling in spite of herself. “Welcome back.” She finished bandaging up his hand and tied off the cloth. “Little fawn, that’s what your mother calls you, isn’t it?”
A tiny, almost imperceptible nod. Claude’s eyes still hadn’t left her face. He looked shocked, but not upset. His body relaxed even further, uncurling from the fetal position, and his eyelids drooped. Despite the fact that he definitely still had a fever, he seemed much more at ease than he had been even since that day he first fell ill. He looked like he might even fall asleep. That was good - once he drifted off, maybe Judith could clean him up and then get the healer to come back in to heal his hand without setting him off. She pulled the covers up over him. Thinking of Tiana had brought back memories of when the two of them were children together, and there was always something that Tiana’s mother said when tucking them into bed. Knowing Tiana, she’d likely continued the tradition with her own child. Judith found herself whispering the words: “May the Goddess bless you and keep you, forever in Her care.”
Suddenly, Claude’s good hand darted out from under the blankets and grabbed one of Judith’s. Judith was startled for a split second, wondering if she’d done something wrong, but then she noticed the tears at the corners of Claude’s eyes. He squeezed her hand hard, face pleading. “What is it?” she asked. As expected at this point, Claude didn’t answer verbally, but he did squeeze her hand again. For Judith, realization began to dawn. “Do you… want me to stay?” Another tiny nod. Judith smiled. She’d never been a particularly touchy-feely person, but this… she could do this. Reminding Claude of his mother had appeared to allow her to earn his trust, and if this was what he needed right now, then Judith would provide. “Okay,” she said, and lowered their joined hands to the bed. “I’ll stay with you.”
Finally, Claude allowed his eyes to slip shut. Judith continued to hold his hand until she was sure he was fast asleep.