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Technoblade hated parties. They were noisy and often involved wearing very itch and uncomfortable clothing. And even worse, it was looked down upon to ignore annoying rich people and leave parties without getting permission from the host when you were the featured guest.
So safe to say, he was absolutely miserable as he stood in a busy and bright ballroom. He had to wear an overly-starched tunic with a collar that was way too tall, so he couldn't even move his head very well. His also had to wear boots to cover his hooves and they weren't worn-in in the slightest, so he has been waddling around all night. Luckily, he got to wear one of his cloaks (a less used one with some gold accessories added on to look more dressy) and his hoglin skull. He wasn't allowed to bring his weapons or armor inside because apparently they would 'make him seem aggressive', like his appearance didn't already make everyone think that.
Techno had been hoping that he could slip into the party and stick to the walls to remain undetected until he could make a dash for the castle's library, which was thankfully open for the party. He hadn't had too much hope, but any that he did possess was immediately dismissed by his and Phil's arrival being announced as soon as they stepped foot into the ballroom.
So here he stood, in the middle of a crowd of disingenuous rich people who all wanted to shake his hand and try to form shallow connections. Very few people actually acknowledged Phil. Techno felt like going on a bit of a rampage at that detail, and the voices were in full agreement.
Phil had pointed out several flaws in Techno's battle plans that surely would have caused them to lose the war, and he helped a lot on the battlefield by taking out several ravengers that the opposing army had somehow captured and set loose.
Phil didn't seem too bothered though, so for now, Techno wasn't going to make a big commotion out of it.
Beside him, Phil stood wearing a fitted black turtleneck and a longsleeve green top with lots of gold detailing and a black waistband. He had on black boots, darker green baggy pants, and a black shawl which had white diamond and gold swirl designs woven into the fibers. His wings were folded tightly against his bare back and Techno was on lookout for any contact made with them and would subtly attempt to trip anyone who made the mistake of staring at his wings for too long or anyone who, Gods forbid, touched them. Instead of wearing his hat, some of his hair was braided around the crown of his skull and had little gold and emerald cuffs clipped into the strands (courtesy of Techno) and the rest of his hair was left down and fell just past his shoulders.
All the gold on his partner made Techno extremely giddy and all he really wanted to do was scoop Phil into his arms and carry him off so they could play with each others hair and cuddle. They hadn't been able to get a full night's rest since the war started.
Techno's ears twitched and his tried his best to stifle his cringe at the sheer volume of the ballroom. Too many people were talking, and all the noise combined with the constant chants for carnage from the voices was giving him a major headache.
Phil brushed his hand against Techno's and flashed him a reassuring smile.
Just then, a pudgy man nudged his way over to the pair. He gave them a charming grin and a small bow. He grasped Phil's hand in both of his and quite aggressively shook it, as well as Phil's entire body. Techno worked very hard to prevent himself from punching him. The man finally let go after a few seconds. He glanced and Techno and decided against giving him a handshake as well. A smart choice.
He said, "Greetings and congratulations on your recent victory. I worked as a secretary under the kingdom's old king, and I am very thankful that he has been overthrown. I know I am not alone in that mindset."
Phil nodded along politely as the man spoke on about the economics and political houses of the kingdom, but Techno found himself tuning it out. Usually he listened to everything people said to make sure there were no thinly veiled threats or opportunities to get the upper hand, but he just couldn't focus.
Against the wall in the ballroom, a small orchestra was playing soft melodies for people to dance to if they wished, which some did.
Some people had carried in plates from the dining hall and were eating while they walked around. Their silverware scraped against their plates and Techno cringed at the noise under his skull.
A woman in a group a bit away from him loudly laughed at something a man had said. Others quietly joined in on her amusement, though not quite as loud as her. At least she was having a good time.
Across the room, Techno noticed the pink-haired Niki Nihachu chatting with the kingdom's temporary cabinet. Techno had spoken to them when he'd first arrived, but Niki jumped in and diverted their attention. She must have sensed his mental anguish at having to socialize so soon. Or she just noticed he was hopeless at forming political alliances without vaguely threatening people. Either way, it was appreciated.
Techno was snapped out of his mental wandering by the man who had been speaking to him saying goodbye and leaving. Phil's shoulders slumped slightly but he quickly straightened up again when another person started speaking to them, this time a dark haired man with a mustache.
Techno made some pointless small talk and fumbled through a conversation about local politics (he had been in this kingdom on peaceful terms for a few days, he wasn't yet an expert on local politics).
Phil, once again, took over most of the conversation and let Techno relax a bit. He'd need to pay Phil back somehow when they got home to their main Antarctic Empire base. Maybe he'd wash his wings and give him a detailed preening? He could always offer himself up to the crows for an hour or two to let Phil have some alone time with Kristin.
A small group of children ran through the legs of people in the crowd, shrieking to each other as they played tag. Some nearby adults laughed at the childish antics which others grumbled about children being present.
Techno's head gave a small twitch as the high-pitched shrieks and the voices demanded to figure out which were orphans of war.
While Techno had been thinking, another person had moved to talk to him and Phil. Maybe multiple. Now there was a woman dressed in an orange dress. She laughed, at what Techno wasn't quite sure, and Phil politely smiled. Maybe he also didn't know what she was laughing at, or maybe he just didn't find the topic to be all that funny. Phil was very giggly, so the latter was rather unlikely.
Someone dropped a fork and it clattered to the ground, ringing out sharply as whoever had dropped it rambled about how clumsy they were and they picked it up.
A child ran into a man who had been carrying two glasses of wine and the glasses shattered against the ground. People gasped in shock and moved to avoid staining their clothing. The child apologized then quickly rushed off to continue playing.
The orchestra slightly picked up in volume and the sound of the footsteps of the dancing people picked up in speed.
The voices wanted blood. They had gotten too used to war and now weren't used to not getting their way for so long.
Someone's metal bracelets jingled as they moved their hands.
More shrieking from children. Why weren't they told to play outside?
Techno only registered that his hands were shaking when Phil's much colder hand interlocked with his. He looked to Phil as he rubbed his thumb over the back of his palm, his talons lightly scratching at his skin and sending pleasant tingles through his hand. Phil smiled at him.
"Hey, I'm getting a bit hungry, mind if we step out for a bit and get a quick bite to eat?" Phil asked him.
Techno was a bit confused but stiffly nodded the best he could with his tunic. He really wanted that thing off. It was so stuffy.
Phil turned to the people who had been expectantly looking at them and said, "Okay, we'll be heading out for a bit. We'll be back to finish up our conversation in half an hour or so. Find us then, yes?"
The people murmured their agreements, though some sounded like they didn't want agree, and Phil gently led Techno out of the ballroom and didn't stop to engage with anyone who called out to them as they passed.
They walked through the much quieter halls of the palace and out a side door. Techno didn't know how Phil already knew his way around the palace so well, but he wasn't going to question it. There were just some things Phil could do that had or needed no explanations. They traveling through a small stone corridor and then exited outside.
Techno looked around and found himself in a good sized courtyard with overgrown flower bushes and ivy growing over the tarp that was particularly covering the sky. The waxing moon shone its light and filled the space with silvery light. There were gravel and clover paths weaving through the space and a small oak tree which was reaching up to the sky. The tree had a large rope swing hanging from the branches.
Phil led him over to the swing and gently pushed him into the wooden seat. Techno was momentarily worried that the branch would break, but it didn't.
Techno took deep breaths as Phil unbuttoned the collar on his tunic and retied the laces on his sleeves to be looser.
He perched in Techno's lap, sitting with his side to Techno's chest so his wings were free, and took his hand again, continuing to rub little circles in his palm.
Techno pressed his forehead into Phil's hair and shut his eyes. He smelt of parchment, which was normal, and lavender, which wasn't normal. He should have been allowed to use his normal shampoo.
"Were the voices bad or was it the noise? Or both?" Phil asked.
"Both."
Phil hummed and Techno moved his head slightly so he could feel the vibrations against his right ear.
"We don't have to go back if you don't feel comfortable," Phil said.
"But the party-"
"The party can continue without us. We weren't the only ones who fought in the war. Besides, every conversation I've had in there is just some variation of the same three topics."
Techno quietly laughed. "I don't know how you deal with those people. I didn't even talk to most of them and I'm already gettin' drained."
"I don't quite know either. The 500 years of isolation certainly didn't prepare me for it."
"Hm, maybe your aura just makes people want to get on your good side?"
Phil rolled his eyes and chuckled. "Yeah, sure. My offer still stands though."
Techno thought for a moment, then shrugged. "Eh, why not. You make a very good point. Can you let Niki know at least?"
"Wolfy already told her. She'll be nabbing some potatoes for us."
Phil gave Techno's scalp a few quick scratched and hopped up. He dramatically bowed and offered his hand to Techno. He put on his fancy voice and said, "My liege, may I escort you back to the grand tents?"
Techno grinned at Phil's antics and took his hand. Gods, this man was amazing.