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“Sis, I can’t take it anymore…” Gepard slumps down onto the couch in his apartment and slings an arm over his face with a tired groan.
“Aww, what’s wrong Geppie? Having a rough time with work again?”
Serval settles down next to him and not so gently ruffles his hair, to his great annoyance. She did it all the time to him when they were younger, but for some inexplicable reason, she still does it to him now, despite the both of them being fully grown adults. Gepard will never understand how his sister’s brain works. He leans away from her offending hands, to which she pouts at.
“Yes, it’s that horrible Koski again,” Gepard grumbles, his expression immediately souring, “not only is he incredibly hard to track down, but when we eventually do find and corner him, he sets off his dangerous smoke bombs and ends up getting away. Every. Time.”
Serval looks at him with both pity and amusement in her eyes. “Oh yeah, you’re still super pissed at the guy for the whole photo incident, huh?”
“Do not bring up the photo incident.”
He still has nightmares about the whole ordeal. He’ll never forget the day he found out about the whole thing, having accidentally walked in on several of the Guards trading pictures of his face with each other .
To this day, he still has trouble making direct eye contact with them.
Serval laughs, loud and carefree. “Sorry, I didn't mean to bring it up, it just kinda came out. But geez, you guys sure seem to be struggling with him a whole lot recently.”
“Yes, and I hate it.” The day they finally arrest Sampo and stick him in jail is the day Gepard will finally be at peace again.
“Well, I’m sure you’ll catch him very soon,” she reassures him, slapping his back in encouragement. “Hey, I’m suddenly in the mood for something sweet. Mind whipping up something real quick?”
He huffs. His sister never changes. “Sure.” It’s been a while since he’s cooked for her anyway, since he's always busy with work and all.
“Yay, you’re the best Geppie!”
One late afternoon, while he's patrolling the city, he receives a message from a Guard telling him that Bronya has something she wanted to discuss with him.
Making his way to the inside of Qlipoth Fort, Gepard gently knocks on the door to of the Supreme Guardian's office and announces his presence, proceeding to enter when he hears a muffled ‘Come in’ through the wood.
Bronya is currently hunched over at her desk, the top of her head barely visible behind the mountains of paperwork. Gepard’s pretty sure that even the lightest of sneezes from her can tip over all the stacks of papers with how precariously high they’re stacked atop each other.
“Lady Bronya? You called for me?”
“Oh, Gepard, you have arrived sooner than I expected.” She straightens her posture and gives him an apologetic smile. “Yes, there is something I need to discuss with you. It has something to do with…the photo incident…”
Gepard pales, his body breaking out in a cold sweat. Don’t tell him…
“Unfortunately, I’ve recently been informed that there are rumors of an upcoming auction in the Underworld for a, and I quote, ’very rare photo of Captain Gepard’s cute side’,” Bronya says, feeling slightly embarrassed for even saying that out loud. She winces when she sees Gepard’s already unhappy expression twist into a full on look of pain.
It’s been a while since Gepard felt the urge to shed any tears, he’s certainly done enough of that as a child, but after hearing Bronya's, quite frankly, horrifying news, he wants to curl up into a ball and cry.
Of course, he does none of that—the following shame of doing such a thing would haunt him for the rest of his life—and instead, shuts his eyes and lets out a long-suffering sigh.
“...I see,” he finally responds, after a moment. “May I ask why you are informing me of this?” He thought they agreed to never speak of this ever again. Well, not in front of him at least.
Bronya wryly smiles. “My apologies for bringing up such bad memories, but I wanted to ask for your opinion on whether I should assign some of the Guards to look into this or if you would like to yourself.”
“...With all due respect, Lady Bronya, what could possibly make you think I would want to look into this myself?” He’ll do it if she orders him to, but if given the choice, he will absolutely turn her down.
“Well…it is because I am uncertain whether you would be alright with the possibility of other people seeing this supposed ‘rare’ photo of you, if it does really exist,” she admits.
Oh. She has a point. If she orders the other Guards to handle it, then that means there’s a chance they may see this photo of his…cute side…whatever that is supposed to mean.
Either way, he’s made up his mind. There’s no way he'll allow even anyone even the opportunity of that happening.
“Lady Bronya, I will go investigate on my own.”
“I had a feeling you would say that,” Bronya chuckles.
She then starts to go over all the information gathered so far, detailing where and when the auction is supposedly taking place.
“If what this kind civilian said was really true, then it should be taking place tonight.”
“Civilian? What civilian?”
Bronya nods. “Yes, I met with her the other day. She was generous enough to reach out to the Guards and tell them everything she knew. It was due to her information that I found out about this rumored auction in the first place.”
For whatever inexplicable reason, Gepard has a bad feeling about this. He has no reason to doubt the words of a random civilian he hasn't met, but something about it feels very off to him.
Not wanting to think about it any longer, Gepard sets off to the Underworld after thanking Bronya. She wishes him good luck and returns to her paperwork.
As it turns out, there is no auction. However, Gepard instead finds something, in his opinion, much worse: a fairly sizable gathering of people who were looking forward to the auction. Meaning, they’re people who previously bought photos of him. Great.
He takes in a deep breath and summons every ounce of authoritativeness within him before approaching them with the intent to gather as much information as possible. Clearly, someone set them all up, and he has an inkling of who it might be.
It takes him no time at all to interrogate everyone, even managing to confiscate any of the remaining photos of him they had on their person. Gepard has to exert an egregious amount of self control just to remain composed and not blush every time a person (reluctantly) hands their photos to him. When he asked whether it was a tall man with blue hair named Sampo Koski that told them about the supposed auction, everyone said no, each claiming to have found out from acquaintances they knew.
Once he makes it through everyone, he sends them all off with a warning that if the Guards catch any of them in possession of illegal photos again, they will be arrested. Everyone goes back home in a dejected manner.
With nothing left for him to do, he also heads back home.
As he’s making his way back to the elevator, out of the corner of his eye, he spots a familiar figure in the distance. A tall figure with blue hair who's holding a comically large wad of cash.
There’s only one person—no— criminal that it could be. Gepard feels his blood pressure go up.
“Koski! ”
Sampo perks up at the mention of his name but immediately panics upon seeing who it is. “Captain Gepard?! Where did you come from?!” he shrieks. Quickly cramming the cash into his pockets, he makes a break for it in the other direction.
“Stop! You’re under arrest! Get back here immediately!” Gepard yells, sprinting after him.
He knows speed isn’t exactly his greatest strength, but how has Sampo already created this much of a distance between the two of them?! This is bad. If this keeps up, Gepard’s going to lose the guy, especially since he’s not as familiar with the Underworld’s layout as much as the Overworld.
Fueled purely by desperation (and maybe a bit of rage), Gepard thinks of an idea. Activating his ice abilities, he summons frost that encases his shield, surrounding it with an aura of freezing air. He then proceeds to hurl it with all his might directly at the back of Sampo’s head.
As inappropriate as it may be, when he hears the sound of loud thud, followed by a shout of pain, a part of him feels a sense of satisfaction. The other part of him feels bad, hoping he didn’t hurt Sampo too badly, even if he kind of had it coming.
When Gepard finally catches up to him, he doesn’t bother trying to hide his amusement at the sight of a Sampo Koski hunched over on the ground, gingerly rubbing at his frost covered back.
“I thought the Silvermane Guards weren’t supposed to hurt citizens, wanted or not!” Sampo points an accusatory finger at him.
“You would be correct. Every Silvermane Guard does indeed take an oath promising to shield Belobog and its people from harm, to ensure the laws of this land are upheld,” Gepard agrees with a brisk nod. He picks up his fallen shield and looks it over for any damage. Not even a single scratch. “But I’m sure Lady Bronya will overlook it just this once, especially considering your status,” he says darkly.
“Where are those citizen rights of being judged by a fair trial and all that stuff you Guards shout at me all the time?!”
“You lost that right when you decided to illegally sell photos of me. ” That’s not actually true, by law, Sampo will receive one. But Gepard is still a little mad over the whole photo incident, okay?
“You’re joking. Please tell me you’re joking,” Sampo says, sounding a little hysterical.
Gepard rolls his eyes. “Get up. I’m taking you with me. You better not try anything funny,” he warns.
“S-Sampo Koski isn’t gonna try anything at all, so there’s really no need to pummel me with that massive shield of yours again, my good Captain,” Sampo nervously chuckles, eyes flitting back and forth from Gepard’s face to the shield by his side.
Sampo then suddenly stills, a sheepish expression on his face. “Hey, uh. Would you mind giving me a hand? It appears that Sampo Koski cannot get up on his own because, y’know.” He points to his backside, still covered in frost.
Gepard sighs. “...Fine.” He supposes he has no other choice. The only other option of simply dragging Sampo along with him across the ground is probably not the best look for him as a captain, however tempted he is to do so.
Gepard extends a free arm toward Sampo, waiting for the other to grab a hold onto his hand so he can pull him up.
A gloved hand slides into his own but then, all of a sudden, Gepards feels himself being harshly yanked downwards, falling towards the same man he was offering his help to a second ago.
Another gloved hand that grips onto his shoulder and holds him in place, stopping his fall. Gepard finds himself inches away from Sampo's face and his cheeks heat up at the abrupt proximity. “What are you—mmph!”
He feels a warm pair of lips press against his own.
Gepard's mind grinds to a halt, unable to think about anything except for the feeling of being kissed.
He’s so out of it in fact that the sound of soft hissing in the background doesn't fully register in his mind until Sampo pulls away, and he is immediately hit in the face by a plume of smoke, causing him to instinctively cover his mouth.
By the time the smoke clears away, Sampo is gone.
Gepard grits his teeth, frustrated at himself for letting his guard down and ultimately allowing Sampo to get away again. And he was so close to capturing him once and for all this time too.
Without thinking, he touches his lips. A wave of shame washes over him when he realizes that he actually didn’t mind the kiss all that much. That he rather enjoyed it.
Gepard doesn’t understand.
Why does he miss the feeling of a criminal’s lips against his own? What is wrong with him?
The only things on his mind when thinking of Sampo Koski should be ways to arrest him once and for all, not how it would be like to kiss him again. The only feelings he should harbor for the man are disdain and annoyance for always breaking the law (and for the damn photo incident.)
So then why does his heart flutter at the thought of seeing him again?
Whatever it means, he at least knows one thing for certain: this is all Sampo Koski's fault.
bonus:
It’s another peaceful day for Natasha at the clinic. All her patients have been taken care of, so she decides to keep herself busy by reorganizing her medical supplies.
She hums to herself, appreciating the rare silence for once as she sorts through everything. She picks up a slightly loosened roll of bandages and unravels it, before rewrapping it again.
“Natashaaaaaaaaa! I need help!”
Sampo flings the door wide open. The resulting bang of the door slamming against the wall startles Natasha so badly she almost drops the bandages in her hand. She whips her head around to give him a disapproving look.
“Sampo. Please refrain from kicking down my door because you will break it. And you know what happens if you break something.” Natasha sets the bandages down with a heavy sigh. “Also, please stop yelling. Some of my patients are sleeping,” she says, pointedly gesturing around.
“Yes, ma’am,” Sampo gulps. He heads over to Natasha’s desk and sits on top of it, making himself comfortable.
Natasha shakes her head, too used to his antics by now. “So, you said something about needing help?” She lifts an eyebrow. “Don’t tell me you scammed another wealthy ‘client’ of yours, and they’re hunting you down. Again.”
“No, it’s even worse this time!”
Even worse ? Suddenly, Natasha is regretting her decision to offer Sampo help.
“Sampo…what did you do…”
“I was running away from Gepard, but he eventually got me and out of sheer panic, I kissed him as a distraction so I could get away, but now I think I have feelings for the guy,” Sampo blurts out all at once, looking incredibly flustered.
Natasha’s jaw drops, baffled. “Sampo, you what ?”
“I think I like Gepard,” he cries out in despair, seconds away from a full blown mental breakdown.
Wow. Where does she even begin with that?
“Um, Sampo,” she starts out gently, a bit taken aback, “I mean this in the kindest way possible, but what is wrong with you? Why would you ever think that kissing the man who’s been trying to arrest you this entire time was a good idea? Maybe I should give you a checkup. Specifically, one for your head.”
“Hey, don’t be so mean to Sampo Koski,” he pouts at her, “I came here to get advice, not to be slandered for my life choices.”
“I was kidding.” Mostly. She’s mostly kidding. A small part of her meant it though. How does someone like Sampo manage to fall in love with someone like Gepard? If she looks up the very definition of opposites in a dictionary, she’s certain Sampo and Gepard would be listed in there.
“Nat, what do I do…” Sampo whines, slumping forward with a sigh. “Curse you Gepard Landau for being so cute and likable,” he mutters quietly, mostly to himself.
“Well, like I said I could try giving you an assessment to check for any brain damage—”
“Sampo Koski’s brain is completely fine, thank you very much!”
“—or you could try confronting these feelings of yours, perhaps by confessing?” Natasha has a feeling that option wouldn’t go down very well, considering, uh, everything , but she figures she’d at least recommend it anyway. A part of her is rather curious as to what it would be like if the two of them do end up getting together.
Probably a disaster, huh.
“Confess? But I’m pretty sure he hates my guts! He’s always trying to arrest me! There’s no way he would ever accept me,” Sampo laments.
What was that useful phrase the Trailblazer taught her again? It’s at the tip of her tongue—Oh, she remembers now.
“That sounds entirely like a you problem, Sampo.”
Sampo gasps in mock offense. “Naaaaat!”
Natasha spends the rest of her afternoon, against her will, consoling a sulking Sampo Koski.
Meanwhile, over in the Overworld, inside a certain workshop, Serval is trying her absolute best to not laugh at her younger brother while he rants about a certain blue haired criminal being the bane of his existence yet again. The only difference this time is the small blush that somehow made its way onto his cheeks.