Work Text:
Ren wasn't in their bedroom when Ryuji got home, which could've meant anything… but Ryuji had a bad feeling about this one.
Typically, if Ren wasn't in their bedroom, Ryuji could hear him puttering around some other room in the apartment - making food in the kitchen, or laughing in the living room with Ryuji’s mom, but today… nothing. And his backpack was still here, so that meant he wasn't at work or the store or therapy or wherever else he wandered off to.
…Yeah. There was one place Ren could be.
Ryuji hesitantly opened the door to the spare bedroom, the one that was supposed to be Ren’s but hadn't even been touched since before Ren moved in, and there he was.
Ren was laying on his stomach on the bare mattress, his arms halfway hanging off the bed and his head resting on the edge of it, tilted down so he could easily stare at the floor. A single tear slowly made its way down his cheek, but based on the tracks there, there had been many others before it. Ren was wearing his glasses, too, which he rarely did at home but… whenever he did, Ryuji knew it could only mean bad things. They were a safety blanket to him, the closest he could get to actually donning his Joker mask anymore, and… and he'd been doing so good lately - he hadn't been wearing them for a while. Ryuji wondered what happened.
Without moving the rest of his body, Ren’s dull gaze flicked over to Ryuji. In the shadows of the dark room, his eyes looked nearly black. Ryuji frowned at him.
“... You okay, Renren?”
Ren slowly curled inward on himself, curving so his back was toward the door and Ryuji couldn't see his face anymore.
…That was as much of an answer as he was gonna get, huh?
Ryuji considered moving him to their room, but Ren was hiding. He likely just wanted to be left alone to stew in his feelings, but Ryuji wouldn't let that happen. They'd compromise. Ryuji would let him be all angsty in this dark, empty room, but Ren wouldn't be allowed to do it alone.
Without another word, Ryuji turned and left to grab the biggest blanket he could find in the house. The one on the couch was literally made for multiple people to sit under it, so it ended up winning. Ryuji dragged it back to the spare bedroom, where Ren hadn't moved a centimeter, and threw it over him. Ren stirred slightly as the blanket settled over his body, but stopped moving once the blanket stopped.
Ryuji crawled onto the bed and shoved himself under the blanket with Ren, who made a small noise of protest.
“‘m not makin’ you talk or anythin’, just wanna cuddle.”
Ren made another noise of protest but Ryuji was determined, positioning himself until he could pull Ren’s curled body against his chest so they were spooning. It was kinda funny, admittedly, to forcibly spoon someone, but Ryuji managed to keep his amusement about that to himself.
Ren eventually relaxed and went back to moping while Ryuji wrapped his arms around him and pulled him in tighter. After Ren’s breathing stopped sounding like he was seconds away from sobbing, Ryuji nuzzled his face into Ren’s shoulder.
“... Just sad,” Ren practically whispered, voice all raspy, and Ryuji figured that was the most explaining he was gonna get out of Ren.
Ryuji nodded in understanding. He didn't quite get what Ren was going through, but Ren had explained in detail the inexplicable days where he spiraled for seemingly no reason, and how sometimes the random spiral was enough to cause another spiral when he got upset about being sad because it felt like he was moving backwards, like he'd never get better. Now that was a feeling Ryuji knew well.
“Well, I'm here for you and I ain't leaving. I gotcha, Ren. You're okay.” Ryuji hugged Ren tighter to his chest, and Ren exhaled with a small groan. He tried for two seconds to turn over, but when it took more than minimal effort he stayed put. Ryuji laughed a little and pressed a kiss to the side of his neck. “I gotcha, Renren,” Ryuji murmured again, and Ren tried to scoot even closer to Ryuji. “Didja take your pills today?”
It was maybe the wrong thing to say, because Ren stiffened a little. “... What if I never get better? What if I gotta take ‘em every day for the rest of my life forever?”
That didn't answer his question, but clearly Ren was in the secondary “the depression will never end” spiral, which meant that Ryuji had enough knowledge to actually comfort him.
“Aw, Ren. You've been through a lot, y'know? Give your brain some time to deal with it, jeez.” Ryuji pressed a kiss to the crown of Ren’s head, nearly drowning in his raven hair for a second in the process. “An’ even if you do gotta take ‘em for the rest of your life, so what? Some people need wheelchairs, some people need PT, and you need your pills.”
Ren didn't really respond, he just kinda relaxed and sighed.
“... Y'know, if you wanna take a nap here, I promise I'll still be here when you wake up.”
Ren didn't react at all for a few seconds, but then he shifted a little, presumably getting more comfortable. Ryuji pulled him closer again once he'd stopped moving.
They lay in silence for a while until Ryuji got pretty sleepy himself. “Love you, Renren,” he murmured quietly, partially to see what stage of consciousness Ren was at. Based on the quiet little moan of acknowledgement, the answer was “barely”. Ryuji smiled a little and let himself drift off.
And when they woke up a couple hours later, Ren was much more like himself again.