Chapter Text
Aegon walked to the closed door and turned the knob. His eyes slid over the empty walls as he felt a slight headache. He shook his head and climbed onto the dusty bed. Aegon didn't know why the first three rooms down the hall were empty and closed, but whenever he felt scared or sad he found comfort in those rooms, especially the first.
His mom woke him up the next day, scolding him for wandering again before giving him a soft kiss on the forehead. Aegon promised once again not to do it again, though they both knew that wasn't true. The six-day-old boy with the name would do it again.
“Let's go with your kepa to eat, my sweet boy” she said, taking his little hand in his. Aegon nodded grabbing his favorite toy. It was a beautifully carved horse, he had found it in the room in front of this one. His mother said that it was a gift from Princess Rhaenys before remaining silent and massaging his forehead.
Aegon did not know Princess Rhaenys beyond the fact that she was his sisters' grandmother, but the little horse gave him comfort. He had the feeling that someone else had given it to him. As every time he had the briefest impression of dark hair and loving eyes before he disappeared.
Once again the boy didn't dwell on it much and started talking to his mother. He told him about his beloved dragon and that he hoped he would soon be old enough to ride it with... Baela said , but he continued thinking that he had had more names on the tip of his tongue.
Rhaenyra looked at the message that Vaemond was going to King's Landing to request that he be named heir to Corlys Velaryon and something like protective anger worked its way into his gut before disappearing. There was no reason for her to feel this way. She and Laenor had had no children and Baela may have been Laena 's daughter , but she was still a Targaryen and a woman.
Rhaenyra knew that Rhaenys wanted Baela to be the heir to the Driftmark , but Corlys seemed to disagree. Sometimes his old good father would find himself saying that this inheritance was for someone and would cut himself off before saying the name and abandoning the conversation. Rhaenys always looked upset and irritated after those times, but Rhaenyra felt something calming for some reason.
After that she always felt very bad. Baela and Rhaena were very dear to her, she somewhat regretted not having had children with Laenor so that she and Laena could keep their promise to betroth their respective children. That seemed to make a lot of sense to her, she was thinking of Baela as the future queen and Rhaena as lady of Driftmark and that felt right .
She loved the girls as her own, wished them the utmost happiness, and somehow couldn't seriously consider helping Baela fight a claim or accept any of the marriage proposals for either girl. Daemon seemed to agree, saying that none of them were enough, that they weren't of his blood, it's just that taking away the Velaryons from lesser branches there really wasn't anyone good enough, was there?
The only ones he could think of marrying the girls to was…His thought was interrupted by two wild dragons flying away. One green and one pearly. Vermax and Arrax , she thought to herself before blinking and forgetting it. Her heart hurt as if it had been ripped from her chest. The feeling of loss increased, sudden and overwhelming, like so many times in the last six years and she pressed her hands on her belly with tears in her eyes.
Daemon found her hours later when he gave her a second message. Laenor wanted to see them, he was going to be in Kings Landing for a few days and they could take advantage of the excuse of Vaemond 's request .
Rhaenyra 's heart skipped a beat. She hadn't seen Laenor since Aemond lost his eye and Alicent attacked her because… because she blamed her because... She had been thinking about how alone she felt with Alicent 's vile lies and how she loved Daemon and feared for… feared for… feared for the people she loved. Laenor had suggested he disappear, he had nothing that tied him to Dritfmark , it was a responsibility he did not want.
Laenor had seemed almost hunted that day. Rhaenyra was relieved and confused, but had agreed. The last she saw of Laenor was that morning when they drank together and said goodbye. From then on they only communicated through brief letters that felt like something that shouldn't be happening , but were useful.
Her father was in poor health and Rhaenyra feared it could have been worse if Laenor had not urged her to visit him and bring Geraldys . That along with some other advice made Rhaenyra wonder …
Rhaenyra shook her head. She didn't have time for that, if she wanted to get to the Capital and try to mend the rift between her and Rhaenys by offering her support.
Rhaena looked at the three dragons flying near the ship, for a second she wondered if they would follow them, but no. After a sad roar from the three of them, they took flight again and walked away. She always felt a pang in her heart when she saw them and it wasn't just because of her longing to have a dragon. Sometimes she saw them and half expected to see...
She shook her head, she hated that annoying feeling, like she was forgetting something, sometimes she could almost tell what it was and some days she thought it was loneliness. Baela had gone away with his grandmother four years ago, her sister always wrote to her, but it was incredibly lonely. She missed her sister, her twin, her best friend, but she also felt this hole that she had lost someone.
It wasn't like her mother's death, it was more similar to her father's absences, when she felt abandoned and left out. Except that her father always got better after getting into one of his moods and had been more attentive, but still, even when Baela was around, she found herself turning to talk to someone who was never there, a feeling of disappointment gripping her every time.
And she always returned to the dragons, as if they had the answer to what she was looking for, as if they felt this abandonment just as she did.
Aegon smiled at her and for a second her mind played tricks on her and she imagined a taller boy with curly brown hair smiling at her and calling her mandia , which didn't make any sense, because she only had two younger brothers.
Baela looked at the half-finished letters on his desk, one for her father and one for her sister. There was a blank parchment, but that was nothing new, many times she found herself taking out a parchment to write to someone else, usually when she was so tired that her head hurt so bad that she had broken more than one quill. This time she had even written something: I hope to see you soon.
She snorted unladylikely. She wasn't given to daydreaming and had never met someone she liked enough, but she had someone in mind. Loyal, determined, fierce. She could almost see an image in her mind's eye and could almost conjure up a memory, she always thought of that night when Aemond had claimed Vhagar .
She remembered reaching out for help, she remembered kindness and a sad, somber smile but a warm squeeze. She remembered hitting Aemond and her horrible words and she remembered…screaming, when Aemond lost his eye.
How had Aemond lost his eye?
A knock on the door and the voice of a maid made her jump in surprise. She forced herself to loosen her grip, she had clenched his hands so tightly on the desk that they were almost numb and the pain in her head made Baela 's own voice sound too loud.
Maybe the grandmother was right that she should take something, but the pains came and went without her being able to resolve the cause.
It was better not to dwell on that.
Training always gave Aemond a certain sense of clarity , this time was no different but all day he had felt strange, off balance, like he had missed a step on the ladder.
The last time that had happened he was remembering the night he lost his eye. A memory so painful that his head always throbbed and he lost the thread of his thoughts.
He had lost his eye because... Aemond deserved revenge... Only he had lost an eye to claim a dragon, no his... He had to be better, it would remind him of his place...
Aemond turned after finishing his fight with Sir Criston , scoffing at the idea of participating in a tournament, he smiled and fixed his one eye on... no one. The place he was looking at was empty even though half a second before he swore there had to be two boys in blue capes and dark hair.
He shook his head and looked at Vaemond Velaryon who had just entered.
Helaena talked pure nonsense and nonsense that Aegon couldn't be bothered with most days, especially when his sister talked about her imaginary friends. Except sometimes Aegon got so drunk that he hallucinated the same non-existent people.
He sometimes remembered his nephew Jace , who his father had always considered a worthy king even when he was just a drooling baby.
Sometimes he remembered his nephew Luke , so enthusiastic and easy to manipulate.
Sometimes he remembered a baby, barely a year old, walking clumsily with his thick brown hair for everyone to see.
Sometimes he remembered his adventures and misadventures in the prison he called home and remembered two other figures near him and his brothers, dark hair where their were silver.
Sometimes he remembered how “whore” wasn't the only accusation that was thrown at Rhaenyra .
Other times things seemed to rotate and overlap, as if he were looking at a slightly crooked painting. He first experienced it the morning they left Driftmark with Aemond having one less eye and one more dragon. Rhaenyra was standing on a balcony looking at them alone , but for a second she swore there had to be two small figures next to her and a baby in her arms. It happened again at his wedding with Helaena , Rhaenyra and Daemon came to the ceremony along with Daemon 's daughters and from time to time Aegon could see the places that others should have occupied, but they were empty .
This time it was the same. Vaemond made his request, Rhaenys was positioned in the middle of the room with her lips pursed and Rhaenyra was… to the side. Aegon knew that she had to be in front, ready to speak and defend herself but his brain reminded him that she had no business there.
After all Rhaenyra had had no children who bore the name Velaryon .
Aegon wondered if he needed to be more or less drunk to believe that.
Laenor looked at his sons, her three strong and brave boys. His heart ached and he rejoiced at all the time they had spent together. In a court Laenor had no idea what to do, neither with his boys nor with anything else, but on a ship? Laenor was finally the father he always should have been. It was ironic that in a life they would not be recognized as Velaryon was when Laenor taught them to be true sailors.
Laenor thought that this type of life suited them all, however Jace 's small resentment and Luke 's melancholy , both old enough to remember Rhaenyra . It didn't help that something seemed to have gone a little wrong.
Laenor must have been the only one who remembered what would now never be. He was the one who had lived it, hiding in Essos while everyone he loved died, while he only received crows or whispers of what was happening and he hoped helplessly that they were lies and everything was okay.
In the end he couldn't resist it anymore, in an almost suicidal drunken night he had grabbed an almost crumbled parchment and had followed the instructions. He woke up several years ago standing in the freezing water of his childhood home.
Laenor acted, guided by desperation and fear, he ran in desperation and hugged his boys tightly. His boys were still alive and safe, but not for long if he left them with Rhaenyra .
Just not completely.
It didn't matter if Laenor fathered them or not, it mattered that he loved them as his children. But that was never enough, the whispers haunted them from their birth and weakened Rhaenyra 's claim and theirs.
In a moment of inspiration he spilled more of his blood along with that of the confused Jace and Luke and an inconsolable Joff . At dawn no one remembered the existence of their children, their eyes slid from their evidence as if they could not see them. Laenor was amazed and happy.
Rhaenyra 's claim would have been equally undermined by accusing her of infertility, but with him apparently dead and her marrying Daemon and having their first child together that wouldn't matter much now.
Rhaenyra was married to Daemon , the man she had loved most and had two beautiful Valyrian -looking children along with another on the way who would hopefully live this time. Viserys was less sick and Alicent had no moral claim to hold against Rhaenyra .
It was mostly perfect with Rhaenyra living the life she always wanted and him having his freedom without the scrutiny of his position.
Perfect with one exception.
From time to time the children remembered the life they had had, as if seeping through the cracks. Jace , always suspicious and intelligent, had become suspicious. That's why Laenor had to do this, even if it hurt him.
Laenor told them that Rhaenyra sent them away for her own protection, then was brutally harsh about what their existence had meant for Rhaenyra 's claim , even though she knew that with the king, he and his father claiming them as trueborn Alicent should never have continued. He went ahead with his accusations and finally Laenor told him that the whole plan was his mother's idea.
He selfishly hoped that when they saw Rhaenyra and Daemond be happy with the twins and young Aegon and Viserys , their children would forget and bury the echoes of the life they did not live.
They were never safe in that other life, they would always be judged for things they couldn't really prove and they would have to fight to maintain what, if they had silver hair, would never have been in doubt.
He refused to lose his children a second time.
The four of them were waiting to the side, in a spot that gave them a great view of a pregnant Rhaenyra carrying Aegon while Daemon held Viserys and a disappointed Rhaena to the side before joining them. For a few moments they were the image of a happy, united and loving family.
Luke 's eyes filled with tears and Jace 's hands clenched at his sides as he saw the happy image. Laenor held Joff tighter to her side, the only one of the children who did not understand despite his dreams of Rhaena , Aegon , and Viserys , and allowed himself to breathe easily for the first time since Jace and his brothers had told him about the apparent dreams that were memories.
Everything would be fine.