Archive of Our Own ^beta

It all started on a Thursday afternoon when Eddie and Christopher walked unannounced through the door to 4995 South Bedford Street. 

Buck was lounging on Eddie’s couch—still Eddie’s, even after five months—watching a nature documentary when he heard the door open behind him. Adrenaline kicked in Buck’s system, caught unaware in his comfy grey sweatpants and a dark blue T-shirt, ready to defend the Diaz house. As Buck shot off the couch and turned around, all the fight left his body immediately. 

That’s how Buck ended up staring idiotically at his two favorite people in the world at 5:48 pm. Not thirty seconds later, Buck had them both engulfed in the biggest hug he could muster, with the biggest smile on his face—it bordered on crazy. 

Later, after a couple of hours of catching up with Christopher after so many months apart and Buck cooking them both dinner, the now fourteen-year-old retired to his room due to the long journey, and Buck was  left alone with Eddie. He trailed after Eddie to the kitchen from the living room, who was beelining for the fridge. Opening it up, Buck watched him assess the contents of the fridge before locking his eyes on the beer Buck knew to be on the bottom shelf to the right. It’s Eddie’s favorite kind.

Tilting his head up at Buck and making eye contact, Eddie asked, “Beer?”

“Yeah, man. A beer sounds great,” Buck replied, still feeling a little winded at seeing Eddie standing in his kitchen, in the flesh.

Eddie straightened back up, gripping two beers between his right fingers and extending both of them towards Buck. He grabbed the beer Eddie was only holding onto with his pointer finger, their hands lightly brushing as Buck pulled the necked bottle away from Eddie. 

As Buck moved to half-lean, half-sit on the kitchen table, Eddie pulled a face, moving the beer away from his face to inspect the label. Shooting Buck a puzzled look, he said, “I thought you didn’t like my brand of beer? You told me it was too bitter.”

Buck stilled, feeling caught out, and brought the bottle up to his lips to take a swig before answering. Flitting his eyes between Eddie’s and focusing his eyes on the pictures on the fridge, he replied, “I accidentally bought a six-pack of them after you’d left and you weren’t here to drink them, so…” Sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck with his left hand, he continued, “Anyway, it kind of kept happening and I didn’t want to go back to the store or give them away. They grew on me, made me feel like you were still here.” Buck darted his eyes back up to Eddie’s face, analyzing his expression.

“I missed you, too, man. It hasn’t been the same without you.” Eddie’s eyes bore into his, gripping his beer like a shield, hesitant, as if he thought their dynamic would have changed after five months apart.

A smile graced Buck’s lips, and he set the beer down on the table beside him as he pushed himself off the surface of the table. Reaching out towards Eddie, he huffed, “Just come here, Eddie.”

Eddie looked surprised for a split second, but then blindly set his beer down on the counter behind him, opening his arms to go for their normal cross-body hug. Buck felt the tension run out of his muscles as he was wrapped up in Eddie’s arms. He tucked his head next to Eddie’s, feeling his soft, ungelled hair brush up against his cheek. Buck gently inhaled the smell of Eddie’s cologne before opening his mouth to mutter against his neck, “I’m glad you’re back home. It’s where you and Chris belong.”

Pulling away from the hug, Eddie gave him a warm smile and agreed, “Me too, Buck,” tipping his head in the direction of his room, he said, “I’m kind of tired from the drive, so I think I’m gonna head to bed.” 

“Right. Right, of course. I guess I’ll just grab the sheets to make up the couch.” Buck stated, starting to make his way towards the kitchen door when he felt a hand clasp around his wrist. Buck’s momentum halted as he turned quizzically towards Eddie, glancing down at the strong hand on his wrist and back up to Eddie’s face. 

“You’re not sleeping on the couch, Buck.” 

“Oh. Okay, right. Um, I’ll go call Maddie and see if I can crash on her couch for a couple of days while I look for an apartment,” Buck faltered, slightly twisting his wrist to free it from Eddie’s grip. 

Eddie scrunched his face up in confusion, “What? No. I meant that you’re going to sleep with me.” Rolling his eyes at Buck, he continued, “You literally live here, Buck. You pay rent. I’m not kicking you out for God’s sake.” 

Ignoring the dumbfounded look on Buck’s face, Eddie dragged him through the doorway to the dining room and then into the hall; Buck trailed after him like a puppy with a new owner. Walking through the bedroom door, Eddie finally let go of his wrist to cross the room to his suitcase of essentials. Lamenting the loss of warmth, Buck frowned at his wrist before looking back up to watch Eddie. 

Eddie, who was now stripping out of his shirt. Oh, wow. Buck doesn’t remember ever being attracted to someone’s back, but he can’t tear his eyes away. Buck felt the heat rising in his cheeks and forced himself to turn around and change before he could ogle his best friend anymore. Buck might have acknowledged his propensity for a few… less-than-platonic thoughts about his straight best friend, but he was keeping a firm lid on those thoughts. Clearly, this objective was easier when said best friend was over eight hundred miles away, and decidedly not stripping out of his clothes five feet away. 

Once Buck put on his pajamas, he turned around to find Eddie swiveling his head away from Buck, marching out of the room towards the bathroom. Buck sat down on the bed until he heard the click of the lock and the low creaking of the bathroom door. He pushed the bathroom door open to find Eddie putting toothpaste on his toothbrush. Eddie spared him a glance before offering the toothpaste up to Buck, who grabbed it along with his toothbrush. They stood side by side in front of the sink, the sounds of brushing their teeth filling the space in between them. After spitting out the foam in their mouths, Eddie left the bathroom, closing the door behind him so Buck could relieve himself. It was achingly familiar to the routine Buck and Eddie had before he left for El Paso, and it sent a pain through Buck’s heart.

Washing his hands and leaving the bathroom, Buck sidled up to the bedroom door and looked in on Eddie turning down the sheets, and he felt the pain in his chest smooth over and dissipate like it was never even there. Buck crossed the room to the left side of the bed and slid his legs under the covers, looking over at Eddie, who was also getting comfy under the covers. Eddie plopped his head on his pillow and groaned, “Your bed is so much better than mine was. Wow, it feels like heaven.”

Buck scoffed, “I wasn’t going to sleep on your trashy bed, it was as hard as rocks, dude.” 

Eddie hummed, “Great decision.”

Buck scooted down into the familiar bed, turning his head to look at Eddie, who was reaching up to turn out the light, plunging the room into darkness. Buck blinked, trying to help his eyes adjust to the sudden lack of light, still staring in Eddie’s direction. When his vision returned, he saw Eddie looking back at him, smiling. 

Eddie blinked at him slowly and mumbled, “I’m really glad we’re home, we missed you. G’night, Buck.”

“Me too. Goodnight, Eddie.” Buck replied in a low tone, unwilling to wake Eddie up even a fraction more. 

While Eddie fell further to sleep, Buck still felt wide awake, all the emotions of the day keeping him from closing his eyes for more than a second, worried that when he opened them again, Eddie and Chris would be gone again. Buck couldn’t say how long he lay there and watched Eddie sleep, but it was long enough for tiredness to hit him, too. Buck gently rolled over onto his left side, facing away from Eddie. He knew he would feel compelled to watch Eddie even longer if he allowed himself to.

When Buck was about to let himself slip away into unconsciousness, he heard rustling on the right side of the bed. Eddie had never been one to fidget in his sleep. Eddie once told Buck it was a habit he picked up in the army, so it struck Buck as odd, even if he was too sleepy to think any more about it. Just as Buck let it go, he felt a warmth press against his back. 

Before he could turn his head to look over his shoulder at the culprit, Buck felt an arm snake around his waist. Buck felt his heart rate start to rise, and warm puffs of air were being blown against his neck. He wasn’t sure what to do. Even during quarantine, Eddie had never snuggled up to him in his sleep, and they had a pillow barrier in-between them. Despite his uncertainty about the situation, Buck forced himself to relax into Eddie’s arms, unwilling and not wanting to throw Eddie’s arm off him. Buck thought he could deal with the cuddling, now that he had familiarized himself with the feeling, even if his heart rate didn’t get the memo. Of course, that’s when everything got ten times worse.

Still alert due to the new change in sleeping arrangements, Buck felt the arm move once more. Oh God. That arm was now brushing against the hem of his T-shirt. Buck felt his breath stutter as Eddie’s arm continued its ministrations. Undeterred by Buck’s shaky breaths, Eddie’s palm and arm slipped beneath the hem of his shirt and lay bare against Buck’s stomach. Oh. God.

If Buck’s breath was stuttering before, it was now a full-on halt. Against his neck, he felt Eddie sigh, snuggling ever closer, which was way closer than Buck could handle at this present moment. Maybe closer than he could handle— ever . Especially with the firmness of Eddie’s arm pressing against Buck’s stomach, radiating heat that seemed to seep through every pore on Buck’s body. He felt himself start to overheat. The blush started on his face and worked its way down his body, seemingly outlining Eddie’s arm on his body. Buck wouldn’t be surprised if his skin had a chemical reaction to Eddie, permanently imprinting his arm on Buck, forever marking Buck as Eddie’s. Anyone would be able to see it—Eddie’s brand on Buck. He was wont to admit that it wouldn’t be the worst thing that had ever happened to his body. Maybe if it stayed there, Eddie would have to keep him—no more leaving for different states, and if he did, then he’d have to take Buck with him. 

He glanced at the clock on the bedside table and found that it was 1:32 in the morning. Groaning at his loss of sleep, Buck resigned himself to being tired in the morning and attempted to fall asleep. Buck thought he might as well enjoy Eddie’s closeness while he could. He burrowed closer under Eddie’s arm, slightly pulling his arm closer across his body to take in the comfort of Eddie’s presence. 

Unfortunately for Buck’s sanity, that was only the beginning.

***

The next time it happened was the following day.

Buck woke up after Eddie had already left the bed. He might be inclined to think last night was all a dream, except that his side was exposed to the cold air of the morning. His shirt was pulled up at the very place Eddie’s arm occupied last night.

Buck rolled onto his back in the empty bed and sighed into the morning air. The clock read 8:28 as Buck heard some clattering from down the hall, presumably in the kitchen. Rising from the bed, he pushed himself to his feet and padded across the room and down the hallway towards the noise.

He stopped at the kitchen’s entrance, leaning up against the doorframe, watching Eddie flitting about the kitchen, looking out of place. 

“Need any help?” Buck asked with a small smirk, revealing his amusement over the scene.

Eddie startled, absently bringing his hand to his chest to rest over his heart. “No. I was going to make us breakfast.” He finished with a minuscule pout on his face, his brows ever so slightly tugging downwards towards his eyes.

“Eddie, you just got back home,” Buck protested. Walking into the kitchen, he grabbed the pan and eggs from Eddie’s hands, “Just let me make you and Chris breakfast. Like old times. All you’ve gotta do is sit over there at the table and keep me company.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Buck and Eddie made the occasional comment while Buck cooked them pancakes as a “welcome home” breakfast, mostly just reveling in the comfortable silence of the morning. Chris joined them around the time Buck was finished cooking them, the smell of pancakes breaking through his grouchy teenager tendencies. 

Buck plated the pancakes and slid two plates in front of the Diazes, stacked with three pancakes each. He also set the maple syrup beside them on the table before he turned to grab the butter dish as well.

“These are so good,” Chris garbled out around a mouthful of pancake. “I’ve missed your cooking, Buck. Dad’s pancakes aren’t the same. They get all burnt around the edges.”

After being chided by both Eddie and Buck for not speaking with food in his mouth, Buck replied, “Thanks, Superman. I’ve missed having my boys to cook for. I kept making way too much food, I had to live on leftovers for, like, a week or two. Groceries were certainly less expensive, though.”

Eddie tilted his head at Buck, “Well, now that we’re back, we can go grocery shopping together again. Honestly, I’m more surprised that your groceries were cheaper with me gone. I would have thought your unchecked habits of inspecting the nutrition labels would send you to Whole Foods, rather than our regular grocery store.”

“Hey! It’s not a crime to want to know what’s in your food. The government did a study that proved about 80% of adults read the nutrition labels when purchasing food. So really, you’re the minority here.” Buck countered, waving his hands throughout the air. “You’re setting a bad example for Christopher, Eddie!” 

Christopher butted in, rolling his eyes. “Buck. Dad. I couldn't care less, as long as we have food in the house.”

“Like I said. Bad example, Eddie!” Buck restated while getting up to grab the now-empty plates, making his way to the sink to wash the dishes. Christopher got up from the table and ambled out of the kitchen, mumbling about video games and his thanks for breakfast.

Eddie huffed and rolled his eyes, getting up to cross the few feet to the sink. “He’s doing just fine, Buck.” He leaned his hip against the counter by the sink, trapping Buck between Eddie and the adjacent counter, and crossed his arms. “I’m still alive, aren’t I?” Eddie teased.

Buck turned on the sink to let the water heat up; it always took a while to get warm in the kitchen. “Just barely,” Buck retorted, looking down at the running water and dirty dishes.

Eddie grabbed Buck’s left shoulder with his right hand, turning him towards Eddie. “Hey. I’m back and I’m not going anywhere. Not again.” Eddie’s thumb slipped beneath the collar of Buck’s shirt, gently running across his collarbone and stealing all of Buck’s attention.

Buck would have responded if he had any brain function left. This was the second time in twenty-four hours that Eddie had eluded the barrier of Buck’s clothing to get to his bare skin. Becoming aware of the box Eddie had unwittingly caged him in, he darted his eyes to the hand on his shoulder and twisted his torso back to the dishes, slightly more red in the face than before. Eddie’s hand didn’t leave his shoulder like he anticipated, instead pushing Buck’s chest more firmly against Eddie’s muscled forearm. 

“Also, I’m washing the dishes. Go sit down on the couch, or something,” insisted Eddie, pushing Buck away from the sink with the forearm across his chest. Buck could have resisted, but it was Eddie—why would he? The action flexed his muscles in a manner that was admittedly very appealing to Buck, and he decided not to argue. Instead, he put some distance between himself and the tempting forearm. God, this is so embarrassing. A tempting forearm?!  

Buck quickly, and hopefully subtly, twisted away from Eddie and escaped to the living room. He sat down on the couch and threw his head back against the cushions. Listening to the sounds of the sink running and Eddie’s low humming while he washed the dishes, Buck brought a hand up to his shoulder. Reverently touching the place where he could still feel Eddie’s touch lingering, Buck sighed, and both lamented and loved the unexpected touches from the past twelve hours. It was extremely nice and, honestly, grounding to know that Eddie was there with him, but Buck feared he was not a strong enough man to handle these casual-not-casual touches from Eddie. If it were up to Buck, he would have folded the second he felt Eddie’s arm around his waist last night. But he could do this. He could not misinterpret Eddie’s friendly touches and think pervy and distinctly romantic thoughts about his straight best friend. He’s got this. Right?

***

Wrong. So very wrong. In fact, it was way easier said than done. Buck had to remind himself every five minutes that this was all platonic and Eddie was straight. Absolutely nothing was going on. Well—maybe things were going on for Buck, but they certainly weren’t for Eddie, even if Buck couldn’t stop thinking about the errant touches in their bedroom and the kitchen. And seriously, their bedroom?! Buck was starting to think this cohabitating thing wasn’t going as smoothly as he had anticipated.

It had been a couple of days since Eddie and Chris had returned, and the grocery trip was finally necessary, seeing as groceries dwindled a lot quicker with three mouths, instead of one. Chris, being re-enrolled in his school in Los Angeles, was still happily attending school for the time being, eager to catch up with his friends. Meaning, he was currently missing the wonderful outing to the grocery store. 

Buck had taken pleasure in getting to drive Eddie around again, all too knowledgeable about Eddie’s disdain for driving, especially in LA. Despite Buck driving them around, Eddie still insisted they take his truck because “it was nicer,” but Buck knew that Eddie insisted so he could fill up the gas tank when the time came. 

The car ride to their usual grocery store generally took anywhere from fifteen to thirty minutes, depending on the traffic they encountered. Eddie hooked up his phone to the aux and started scrolling through the many playlists saved on his phone. There were many that Buck had made and sent to Eddie, ones that Eddie had made himself, and also the ones they curated together. Buck secretly liked to guess which playlist Eddie would put on based on his impression of Eddie’s mood. Currently, Eddie was sitting relaxed in the passenger seat, legs spread as wide as they could go, with his head somewhat lolling back onto the headrest. While analyzing the information, Buck put the truck in reverse to back out of the driveway, extending his right arm to grab onto the back of the passenger seat headrest. 

Buck had heard about this action being attractive to the person in the passenger seat, but honestly, Buck thought he needed some mercy on his soul for being the one doing it. Trying to distract himself from the way Eddie’s head was only an inch or two away from his forearm, Buck scanned the area behind the truck once more before letting up on the brake to pull out of the driveway. Buck locked in his answer for the playlist. Eddie likes to listen to Queen when he’s feeling content and relaxed, and Buck knew for a fact there was a playlist solely made up of Queen on his Spotify, and it seemed like a good bet. 

Driving down the road from Eddie’s house, Buck smirked once the beginning notes of a Queen song started pouring out from the speakers. Glancing over to look at Eddie, Buck was surprised to find him already staring at Buck, head still resting against the back of his seat. He cast his gaze back to the road and asked, “What? Do I have something on my face?”

“Yeah. That stupid little smirk you do every time you correctly guess what playlist I’m going to put on.”

“What? Me? Never. I have no idea what you’re talking about, man.” Buck lied while biting the inside of his cheek to keep his smile in check.

Eddie laughed, “You’re so unsubtle, Buck. Every single time I put on music, you either start smirking or frowning, or you grab my phone to ‘check the time’ and open my phone to see what playlist I chose. And after that, then the smirking or frowning commences.”

“Okay, sue me then,” Buck sassed. “Can’t a guy make a harmless bet with himself every once in a while?”

“Nah, Buck. I think you’ve dealt with lawyers enough for one lifetime. Besides, I didn’t say it was a bad thing, just something I’ve noticed.” Eddie quipped, reaching over to push at Buck’s shoulder playfully.

Buck threw him a look of mock offense when Eddie made contact with his shoulder. “Low blow, dude. Low blow.”

“It’s been like five years, Buck! I think that’s more than enough time to get over yourself,” Eddie disputed, grinning at Buck. “Now shut up, I’d like to listen to my Queen playlist, thank you very much. Keep your thoughts to yourself, please.”

Buck just laughed and reached over to turn up the volume and felt content when Eddie started singing along in a low voice, almost absently. Buck drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, carefully navigating the streets of LA while giving every ounce of available attention to Eddie’s singing voice. 

Eventually, Buck made a right into the parking lot and pulled into a parking space midway through the lot. Turning off the engine, Buck grabbed his phone and wallet and opened the door to get out of the car, noticing Eddie’s mirrored actions. They met up behind the end of the truck and made their way into the grocery store, grabbing a shopping cart from the entrance.

Eddie inquired, “Vegetables first?”

“Always.”

Making their way through the store, Eddie pushed the cart while Buck grabbed the necessary items from their shopping list. Bickering with Eddie about the merits of each item versus its counterpart was soothing to Buck. He had missed running errands with Eddie, it was too lonely and quiet without him.

Coming up on the cereal, Eddie banked left into the aisle. Christopher had asked for Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and it was the next stop on the list. Scanning the boxes of cereal for the right brand, Eddie pointed it out on the top shelf, unreasonably far back from the ledge.

Buck stepped across to the left side of the aisle to reach for the cereal box. It was just out of his reach and forced him to raise on his toes, stretching with his right arm towards the cereal box. The action lifted the right side of Buck’s shirt and exposed the skin at his waist. He had just grasped the edge of the box when he heard a loud noise coming from the right. A kid who had supposedly commandeered his mom’s shopping cart was about to ram the cart into Buck and had a malicious and manic glint in his eye. Buck didn’t even have time to think about moving before there was a hand wrapped around his waist, pulling him backward into a chest. 

The momentum and his loss of balance kept him stumbling back into the chest and held there by the arm, which was now partially covered up by his shirt, the material falling back into place. Now out of immediate danger to his shins, Buck recognized that it was Eddie’s arm and Eddie’s chest, which he was coincidentally pressed flush against. In the middle of the grocery store. Buck needed to think appropriate thoughts.

Snapping out of his momentary daze, Buck let out a whoosh of breath and while turning his head to speak to Eddie, said, “Man, that kid almost got me—” Buck cut off his sentence halfway through when he finished turning his head to find Eddie’s just inches away from his face, slightly hooked over Buck’s right shoulder. He resorted to staring when he realized the predicament he was in. He felt Eddie’s thumb rubbing soothingly back and forth against his skin, arm firm around his waist, still trapping him against Eddie’s front. As if that wasn’t bad enough, Eddie’s stupidly gorgeous face was also right in front of Buck’s, smiling at him as if he wasn’t aware they were in a grocery store. He tried to keep his composure, but could he really be blamed if he glanced down at Eddie’s lips a few times?

“Wow, I thought you were about to be a goner,” Eddie laughed. 

Buck was entranced by the smile lines that creased his face and the strand of hair that graced his forehead. He wasn’t usually allowed to look at Eddie from so close a distance, and he was taking in everything he could. Buck wanted to memorize his teeth and the way his canines jutted out further than his others. He wanted to memorize the way Eddie’s eyes looked, like they were the color of coffee beans in the fluorescent lighting, but looked richer in the sunlight. He wanted to memorize the inconspicuous scar that tugged at the bottom right corner of Eddie’s lip and gave it a different texture than the rest of his lip.

“Buck?” Eddie implored, still smiling at him and gently pinching his waist to grab Buck’s attention.

“Oh. Sorry. No, I thought I was going to have to be sent to the hospital. Thanks for saving me, you’re my hero.” Buck noticed he was still encircled by Eddie’s arm, gathered his wits, and stepped away from Eddie’s warm body. 

Although Eddie was making the whole situation harder than it needed to be, he let his hand drag across Buck’s stomach and side as he freed himself from Eddie’s arm. The gentle touch sent a shiver up Buck’s spine, feeling and seeing the hair on his arm raise as goosebumps erupted over his skin. Braving a look up at Eddie’s face, Buck noticed his eyes were drawn to the goosebump-ridden arm.

Feeling caught out, Buck rubbed at his left arm with his right one, willing the goosebumps to go away—the physical evidence of Eddie’s effect on Buck was too telling for him to keep around any longer.

“Your hero, huh? I think I like the sound of that. Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?” Eddie remarked coyly. “I’m your hero, and Chris is Superman. What’s next in the DC universe? Should I start calling you the Flash?” Eddie pondered, squinting at Buck and wagging his pointer finger at Buck’s face. “Because you threw me under the bus with those bees, but we’ve all seen you outrunning us all during training.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Buck deflected, pressing his lips into a line to keep from smiling. 

Eddie laughed, “It’s because you’re all legs, I swear I have like fifty percent more torso than you do. You just wanted to make me suffer with those bees,” he finished, raking his eyes down Buck’s body and back up to his face, with a hint of pink in his cheeks.

“I plead the fifth,” Buck replied, holding up his right hand like he was making an oath.

“Whatever you say, traitor. Come on, we need to finish grabbing these groceries if we’re going to make it back in time to put everything away and go grab Chris from school.”

Becoming aware of his surroundings, Buck realized he had just been flirting with Eddie in the cereal aisle in their regular grocery store. Flirting?? Good lord, he was pathetic. Even if Buck was flirting, which he certainly can’t deny at this moment in time, it’s just platonic for Eddie. He needs to get that through his head. Preferably before Buck does something stupid, like kiss him, or grab him the next time Eddie touches his bare skin . Buck doesn’t think he likes the Universe’s sense of humor sometimes. It felt very cruel and targeted and definitely like a ploy to make his best friend horrified by the fact that he was sharing a bed with someone very much attracted to him and in love with him. Buck looked upwards to the ceiling of the grocery store as if he were looking into the sky and sent a warning to the Universe because one can never be too careful with the unknown. You’re not winning this one if I have anything to say about it. I’m not going to lose the best thing I’ve ever had. I’m not.

Looking back down from the ceiling, Buck noticed Eddie already pushing the cart away, not yet aware that Buck hadn’t started moving yet, and scrambled to catch up to Eddie’s side. Snatching the list from Eddie’s hand, he scanned the list for the next item before replacing it in Eddie’s hand. Buck was very careful not to let his fingers brush against Eddie’s because he could do this. He could handle being in love with his best friend and not let it ruin their relationship.

Buck steeled himself as they made it to the end of the aisle. He led the way to their next item, taking a right out of the aisle, and headed towards the dairy products. Pushing the interaction to the back of his mind, he walked towards the cheese and only glanced back at Eddie twice. Okay… maybe three times. It’s progress.

***

Buck was offered a three-day reprieve from the addictive drug known as “Eddie’s touch” before he got his next fix.

The weather was dreary and rainy the day before Eddie returned to the 118. All night, the rain had slapped against the bedroom and the chill from the storm had permeated the walls of the house, seeping in through the windows and doors.

Ever since Buck had his crush injury, he’s found that on the days when the temperature drops below somewhere around 45 degrees, his knee starts acting up worse than usual. Every time, without fail. So when Buck opened his eyes that morning and could hear the rain still pounding against the roof of the house, he knew it would be a painful day. He lay there for an extra ten minutes, silently cataloging the aches and pains in his leg that he would need to stretch and massage extra today.

Buck already felt the stiffness lingering when he finally swiveled his legs over the side of the bed and rested his feet on the cold floor. He carefully lifted off the bed, stabilizing himself with a hand on the nightstand, and felt a biting pain in his left knee. A few tears sprang to his eyes because of the harsh pain, and he reached down to prod his knee before tenderly digging his thumb into the screaming muscles. He said a quick thank you to himself from last night, who had the smart idea to wear his loose pajama pants—easy enough to remove and light enough not to aggravate his delicate knee.

He grabbed his phone from the nightstand and slightly limped out of the bedroom in search of Eddie and called his name from the hallway. Buck received no response and couldn’t hear any noises from the house, so he made his way to the living room. He peeked out the window to find Eddie’s truck missing and spared a thought for Eddie driving in this weather, and his hatred of driving already.

He was dragged from his musings on Eddie’s whereabouts by a sharp pain that demanded his attention. Buck limped back to the couch and collapsed onto the comfy cushions, laying his right leg out on the couch before grabbing the damaged left leg to aid the position change to lie on the couch.

Buck relaxed as much as possible against the pillow behind his back and lay his head back against the pillowed armrest. He wasn’t sure how long he stayed there unmoving, mildly massaging the muscles above his knee, before he heard a truck pulling into the driveway. Buck rolled his head to face the door, which was partly blocked from view by the back of the couch. About a minute and a half later, he heard keys unlocking the door, and Eddie walked in holding a plastic bag. 

Eddie was soaked. The idiot wasn’t wearing his rain jacket—or any jacket for that matter. His hair and his clothes were drenched by the storm; his hair was plastered to his forehead, stealing the volume Eddie’s hair usually carried, and his clothes clung to his lean, but muscly frame, making Eddie’s shoulder-to-waist ratio look extra appealing. 

Eddie noticed Buck lying on the couch just a few moments after he shut the door with his shoe, slightly leaning back against the door and fighting a chill. “Hey, Buck. How’re you feeling?”

“Not great,” Buck admitted. “My knee hurts like a bitch.”

Eddie nodded. “Yeah, I figured it would when I woke up earlier. Sorry I was gone when you woke up. I was gonna grab some pain meds to set on the nightstand for when you woke up and discovered we didn’t have any. So, I had to run out to the store to get some supplies.” Eddie said, holding up the bag for Buck to see. He walked the few steps to look over the back of the couch and swept his eyes up and down Buck’s body, lingering on the place where Buck was still massaging his knee. He leaned over the couch and rested a forearm on the back, that hand holding the bag while he brought the other to cradle the left side of Buck’s face. Eddie said nothing for a few seconds, just staring and rubbing his thumb against Buck’s cheek.

Buck thought this was a great distraction from the pain of the morning. His attention on his knee was stolen by the thumb brushing his face and the soft look in Eddie’s eye as he revealed he’d braved the streets of a weather-wrought L.A. so Buck could have painkillers. He had remembered Buck’s knee would bring him hell today and wanted to curb it to the best of his ability. Buck felt his cheek press further against Eddie’s thumb when his facial muscles pulled into a smile. “Thank you for doing that for me,” Buck breathed. Breathless over Eddie’s proximity, touch, and thoughtfulness. 

“Of course, Buck. I’m happy to.” Eddie responded, scratching his fingers through Buck’s hair. He slid the hand up to the top of Buck’s hand, still lightly scratching when he spoke again, “I’m gonna go grab some water for you so you can take these pills. I’ll be right back.”

Eddie walked off in the direction of the kitchen, dripping all over the floor and shivering at the chill of the house. When he returned, he no longer held the plastic bag from the store, but two pills and a cup of water. “Open up,” Eddie said, and when Buck complied, he dropped the two pills on his tongue and handed him the glass of water. He waited there until Buck had swallowed and finished with the water, reaching his hand out for the glass to set on the coffee table. 

Once Buck had said his thanks, Eddie headed towards the hallway, presumably to change out of his wet clothing. While Eddie was gone, Buck hoped the meds would kick in soon and relieve some of the pain he was plagued with.

A few minutes later, Eddie returned in dry, warm clothing. He had put his pajama pants back on and wool socks and snagged one of Buck’s LAFD hoodies that somewhat obscured his frame. He rubbed his hands together and blew warm air on them as he returned to the couch. Eddie came to a rest at the foot of the sofa and gently maneuvered Buck’s legs to allow him to sit down and rest his legs and feet back in his lap.

The jostling of his knee, however slight, made Buck groan in pain.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean for that to hurt,” Eddie apologized, his brows furrowing.

Buck sighed. “It’s fine. A gust of wind on my knee would hurt right now; it can’t be helped.”

Eddie scrutinized the legs in his lap. “Maybe, maybe not, but I might be able to help—at least a little bit.” 

Once Eddie had finished speaking, he brought his hands up to rest on Buck’s left ankle, and the bottom of his pajama pants rode up slightly. Eddie rubbed his thumb over Buck’s ankle bone and slowly worked his way up to his calf. Eddie had grabbed the hem of the pant leg with his other hand, making sure the material didn’t move with his hand. He dug his fingers into the flesh and muscle of Buck’s calf, making him groan.

Buck couldn’t even spare a thought to Eddie’s hand making its way up under his pant leg because Eddie’s ministrations felt too good to ignore. The loose material of Buck’s pajama pants allowed Eddie to continue pushing his hand further until it reached his tender knee. Buck couldn’t help but let out an obscene noise when Eddie started massaging the muscles surrounding his knee and slid further down the couch in an attempt to give Eddie more access to his leg.

Eddie brought his other hand up to join the one massaging Buck’s knee, this one resting over the fabric of his pajama pants. Eddie combined his efforts with both hands and kneaded the muscle on the inside of Buck’s thigh, and Eddie’s hand became familiar with the sensitive skin there.

“Good?” Eddie questioned while digging his fingers more harshly into his muscles.

Buck groaned once more. “You know it is, you ass. Where did you learn to give massages like this?”

Eddie just smirked at him. “A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell, Buckley.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Buck said while swatting his hand in Eddie’s direction. “You’ve been with like, what, three people?”

“Says you.”

Eddie’s words made Buck pause. He felt a spike of jealousy and confusion hit him as he mulled over Eddie’s response. “Huh? Did you date a woman in Texas?”

“No, I didn’t date anybody. You should know, with all the rumors I’ve heard about Buck 1.0.”

Buck felt Eddie’s hands gradually stop massaging his leg; now his hand just rested on Buck’s inner thigh, under his pant leg. “And you didn’t tell me?” Buck asked, attempting to keep his breathing in check from the unexpected and intimate touch, but also distracted from the idea that Eddie hadn’t told him about this.

“No, Buck. I didn’t tell you, they didn’t mean anything. Although they were a little eye-opening.” Eddie replied and brushed his thumb over Buck’s sensitive inner thigh, sending a shiver up Buck’s spine.

Buck’s voice rose in pitch, and he propped himself up with his hands, making eye contact with Eddie, and clarified, “They? As in plural?”

“Yes, they. As in plural.” Eddie rolled his eyes and reached over with his free hand to push Buck back against the couch. “Lie down, I’m not finished here.” Eddie punctuated his sentence with a dig into Buck’s thigh.

Buck gave up on propping himself up and went where Eddie told him to with little fuss, but popped back up a moment later and looked at Eddie wide-eyed. “You’re using your sex massages on me!” Buck sputtered and felt the need to point his finger at Eddie to complete the accusation.

“Oh my god, shut up. I am not using my sex massages on you. If I were, you would know,” Eddie defended and pushed Buck down again.

“I don’t think that sentence is much better, actually. What do you mean by ‘I would know?’ Is there quantifiable evidence of what distinguishes a normal massage from a sex message?” Buck queried, now interested in the logistics of different massages.

“Well, for one, usually there are fewer clothes,” Eddie started.

Buck cut in, “Okay, but your hand is literally in my pants right now, so I don’t think you’re helping your case.”

Eddie’s face reddened as he seemed to notice that his hand was up Buck’s pants. “Okay, you know what? Fine. This is a sex massage. Can I continue helping you feel better now?”

Even though Buck won this conversation, he still felt like he lost when he could feel the heat rising in his face. He put on a bravado despite his blush and flirted, “Sure, as long as we both know what’s going on here.”

“That’s great, Buck. I’m so glad we have this clarification,” Eddie said with a faux smile and rolled his eyes. “Make sure to leave a five-star review on Yelp,” he finished as he began massaging Buck’s leg once more.

Buck felt miffed but didn’t want to let Eddie know the genuineness of his words, so he teased, “Leave a five-star review? No one else gets these privileges, they don’t need to know the efficacy of your masseuse skills. Clearly, I’m not the first, so I should be the last.”

In response to Buck’s words, Eddie brought his free hand, not trapped by the material of Buck’s pajama pants, to Buck’s right leg and pinched him. “Don’t get jealous, Buck. No one else is getting massages.”

“Good.” Buck returned to enjoying the massage, feeling free from the knowledge that Eddie wouldn’t give any sex massages to anyone else. At that moment, the entire conversation hit him, and Buck felt like banging his head against the headrest of the couch—hard. What is wrong with him? Why did he just argue that his straight best friend was using his sex massages on him?! God help him. Buck couldn’t believe that Eddie didn’t immediately rip his hand out from his pants and knock him over the head to distract him from the pain in his knee instead. Buck certainly would rather the sweet release of unconsciousness to spare him from his unfiltered mouth.

Buck continued to stew in his embarrassment, having thrown an arm over his eyes, before he felt Eddie’s hand dragging down his leg, trailing its way down his calf to his ankle and slipping out of his pant leg. The tingling sensation Eddie’s touch left behind forced Buck to shift the arm thrown over his face to give Eddie an inquisitive look.

Eddie shifted Buck’s legs off his lap to stand up, still hovering over the end of the couch. Eddie absently grabbed onto Buck’s right, sock-covered foot as he stood there, swinging it back and forth. “Just think that a heating pad will do you some good to relieve some of the stiffness. I’ll be right back.” Eddie departed for the kitchen with a squeeze of Buck’s foot.

In Eddie’s absence, Buck cataloged how his knee felt, pleasantly surprised when the pain had reduced quite a bit. A smile graced his face as he thought about Eddie’s attentiveness to Buck’s needs. He didn’t think he would be able to hide the heart eyes Buck was sure he was sporting, so he flung his arm back across his face when he heard the beeping of the microwave—the signal Eddie was about to return.

Buck heard the quiet thuds of Eddie’s sock-clad feet across the floorboards, and a heat enveloped Buck’s knee. The warmth of the heating pad felt fantastic against his stiff knee, and Buck felt like it was already helping alleviate the tension in his muscles. “Thanks, Eddie. That feels great,” Buck groaned.

“I’m glad it’s helping. I’m gonna go get started on breakfast for us and Chris, but just yell if you need anything, okay?”

Buck peeked out from under his arm. “You sure? I can make breakfast if you want.”

Eddie scoffed, “Don’t be stupid, Buck. You’re in pain. I’m not so helpless in the kitchen anymore, you know? I was forced to learn how to survive without you, so I’m sure I can manage just fine, even if I’m not keen to do it again.”

“Yeah, me neither,” Buck choked out. “I’ll come running—well, I’ll speed walk to the kitchen if I smell smoke,” Buck finished with a teasing smirk.

Eddie swatted at Buck’s arm. “Shut the hell up. I’m not that bad, I’m just not on Chef Buckley’s level. That’s fine,” Eddie said, holding his hands up in a placating manner. “I’ve learned my place through a few too many unsympathetic comments about my cooking.”

“As long as you’re aware.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Eddie muttered as he padded away to the kitchen. The noises of pans and opening cabinets and fridge doors faded into the background as Buck let himself sink into the drowsiness he felt and the warmth of the heating pad on his knee. Buck thought the heating pad did a great job of dissipating the cold spot on his thigh where he felt the stark absence of Eddie’s hand. Content in the knowledge that Eddie was only a couple of doors away, Buck let his eyelids sag until they felt impossible to open, and his breathing deepened as he was pulled into unconsciousness. 

Eddie’s hand was the last thing he thought about before he fell asleep.

***

It was Eddie’s second shift, the next time Buck was tortured by his strong, capable hands, and he was really starting to regret his insistence on Eddie’s sex massages. 

The shift had started great. Buck has been excited to go to work now that he has Eddie watching his back once more—nothing against Ravi, but Buck thought it was probably better for both of their sanity. He practically bounced around the entire station doing his chores now that Eddie could accompany him again. While Eddie had been gone, he had been forced to do everything by himself—it was too lonely. He didn’t have anyone to ramble on about placoid scales and how sharks are villainized and misunderstood, but now that Eddie’s returned, Buck couldn’t be happier.

Buck helped Bobby cook basil chicken pasta for the team and mix up a salad to go along with it. Delicious and nutritious. During dinner, the bell started ringing, and they all piled into the ladder truck. There was a woman stuck high in a tree who had been chased there by a pack of rabid dogs. 

Pulling up to the address, the team was extra careful to protect themselves from the dogs, but upon arrival, the dog catchers dispatched to round up the dogs informed the team they were just a bit over-excited. Free from the stress of contracting rabies, Bobby sent Buck up the ladder to retrieve the frightened woman. 

Buck waited patiently for the ladder to extend to the woman with a harness for her in hand. Once he was halfway to the woman, he called out, “Hi ma’am, my name is Buck. I’m going to be right with you in just a moment, you keep hanging on to that branch, all right?

The woman frantically nodded, and, now almost to the tree, Buck continued, “What’s your name, ma’am?”

She peeled her eyes off the 20-foot drop from her position in the tree and locked them onto Buck. “It’s Deborah,” she squeaked.

Now having reached the tree, Buck reached out a placating hand and said, “Okay, Deborah, you don’t need to worry, I’m going to get you down from there safely.”

Deborah’s eyes already left his as she refocused on the drop beneath her, and she sharply nodded her head in place of words. The branch she was standing on looked unstable, and she was clinging to a thin branch as well. Buck needed to extract her as fast as possible.

“Okay, Deborah, I’ve got a harness right here in my hand for you, it’s attached to the ladder. Since this is as close as I can get, I need you to reach out and grab it. Once you do that, we’re gonna get you to step through both leg holes to secure you. Does that sound okay, Deborah?” Buck extended the harness out towards her, still falling a few feet short of being able to reach the woman himself.

Deborah stared at the harness Buck held in his hand, seemingly too frightened to let go of the branch she was clutching onto. Finally, after about half a minute, she slightly shifted, tightening her grip on the branch as she stretched her left arm out to grab hold of the harness. Buck extended the harness a little further, wanting to make the rescue as easy for Deborah as possible. Her fingers brushed the harness before grasping it and pulling it towards her. At the same time, Buck heard his radio click with Bobby’s voice coming through: “Buck, we’ve gotta get her down. This tree is rotted and it’s not gonna hold up much longer with all this strain.”

“Got it, Cap,” Buck responded. “Deborah, I know this is scary, but I need you to step through those loops as quickly and safely as you can, okay? I’ll be right here, we’re gonna get you down from here.”

Deborah, still clutching onto the harness with her left hand and the branch with her right, hesitantly lifted her left leg while reaching down with the harness. Her left leg slipped in easily, and she stiltedly switched positions to get the harness over her right leg. After about a minute more, Deborah had the harness over both legs and awaited her next instructions. 

“Okay, next I need you to reach out and take my hand. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere. You can do this.”

Deborah nodded her understanding and reached out once more with her left hand towards Buck’s hand. Still holding a deathly grip on the branch, she inched her foot along the branch to get closer to Buck.

“Be careful, ma’am, it’s not very stable up here.” Buck eyed the branch Deborah was inching forward on and spied a break forming in between her two legs. Buck lunged for her hand, and a second later, the branch gave way beneath her front leg, pitching her forward towards the ground. Buck was half leaning off the ladder as he clasped Deborah’s hand, as the woman screamed. Even though her harness was attached to the ladder, there was no guarantee that something couldn’t go wrong, and Buck wasn’t taking any chances. Buck grabbed onto Deborah’s hand, and his right shoulder twinged in pain as her weight was held up by his arm.

“You’re okay. You’re okay,” Buck soothed. 

Deborah had latched both hands onto Buck’s, and he hauled her up until she was safe on the ladder. Buck sweated beneath his uniform, briefly brought his right arm up to roll out the shoulder, and rubbed at his shoulder with his left hand. After he had finished moving his arms, Deborah threw her arms around him and profusely thanked him for saving her. 

“That’s my job, ma’am. I’m glad you’re all right. Now, let’s get you down from here.”

The ladder retracted, and the two of them climbed the rest of the way down to the truck before the ladder was stored once again on the top of the truck. Deborah was escorted to Hen and Chim to get checked out before she was walked over to her car, which was parked about 35 feet away.

Bobby approached Buck once he, too, had been appraised by Hen to look for any injuries. Buck was lucky to scrape by with just a sore shoulder. “Nice save, Buck. You did a good job and easily put her at ease. I’m proud of you,” Bobby said while clapping him on the left shoulder.

Buck turned his head to the left to look at Bobby and felt a twinge in his neck. “Thanks, Cap. I’m just glad she’s doing well. Not quite sure how she got so far up there in the first place, but I’m impressed nonetheless.”

Bobby hummed, “Maybe she did rock climbing?”

His captain’s musings made Buck chuckle, and he pointed out, “She couldn’t get back down, though.”

Bobby squeezed the hand he was resting on Buck’s shoulder. “Never said she was good at it, did I?”

“I suppose not.” Buck smiled as Bobby left his side, presumably to round the stragglers up and check on Deborah one last time. As he left, Eddie walked up to Buck’s side.

“You doing okay, Buck? I saw you rubbing your shoulder, does it hurt a lot?” Eddie said while searching Buck’s eyes.

Buck smiled at Eddie. “Yeah, I’m doing okay. It hurts a bit, probably tweaked a muscle or something, but nothing bad. I think I might just be sore for a day or two, maybe three.” Upon noticing the concerned expression still gracing Eddie’s face, he bumped his shoulder into Eddie’s and reassured him, “I’m fine, Eddie. Promise.” 

Upon returning to the station, it was dark outside, and everyone headed to the bunks to get some much-needed rest before they were called for an emergency again. It was dark in the bunk room, and Eddie’s breathing near his head lulled him to sleep.

Buck awoke, what could’ve been minutes or hours later, from the ache in his back he gained from the call earlier. Buck brought his hands up to his face and rubbed them over his eyes in an attempt to expel the sleepiness that lingered in his eyes. He didn’t get up immediately and hoped that if he lay still enough, the ache would sort itself out and allow him to return to sleep. After several minutes, Buck didn’t think he would be so lucky and forced himself to sit up. He slipped on his boots and grabbed his portable radio sitting next to them before quietly exiting the bunk room to head to the loft. On his way out, he caught a glimpse of a clock which read 12:34 am. Not too bad, that was about three hours of sleep he managed before being rudely woken by his traitorous body. The loft was deserted, and Buck wished he could join everyone back in the realm of the unconscious, but he felt more awake by the minute. 

Buck beelined for the kitchen first to fill up a glass of water that he chugged before he circled the couch in the loft and flopped down, letting his right arm hang off the couch in a poor attempt to stretch it out. He was unsure how long he lay there, resting his eyes and listening to the humming of the refrigerator. The monotony of the noise was broken up by the sound of boots on the stairs. Buck was sure it was Eddie; he’d know Eddie’s gait anywhere. He raised his eyes to Eddie when the sound came to rest just above Buck’s head by the armrest of the couch. 

Eddie spoke first, “Couldn’t sleep?”

Buck sighed at the question, “No, my stupid shoulder woke me up. It hasn’t stopped hurting yet.”

Eddie simply hummed at his answer and started around the couch and sank to his knees in front of where Buck’s arm was dangling off the couch. Buck lifted an eyebrow at him. “Planning something, Eds?”

Eddie waggled his eyebrows at him, and Buck felt a flash of fondness rush through him for his best friend. Here Eddie was on the ground in front of Buck, at probably close to 1:00 am, making a fool of himself just to make him smile and take his mind off his sore shoulder. 

“Yep,” Eddie popped the “p” on the word. “I am back to give you another devious massage.”

Buck fake gasped in scandal. “Eddie, you rascal. You know that’s not work-appropriate,” Buck chided.

Eddie leaned in closer to Buck’s face, mischief twinkling in his eyes, and whispered, “Then we won’t get caught.” He leaned away from Buck’s face, slid his left arm up the back of Buck’s shirt, and attempted to get his right hand through Buck’s armhole, but ultimately failed. “Jesus, Buck. You think you can buy these shirts any tighter?” He opted to gain access through the neckline instead, his hands meeting over Buck’s shoulder.

Buck responded breathlessly, “Not my fault they fit like a glove.” Buck was unsure what he had done to either piss off the Universe or perhaps get on its good side because this was the fifth time since Eddie returned from El Paso that Buck found himself helpless to Eddie’s platonically wandering hands over his bare skin . What even was his life? The glide of Eddie’s deft fingers over Buck’s sore muscle felt like his own miraculous cure-all drug—a balm to his ailments and injuries. Buck was convinced that if he managed to break every bone in his body, a kiss to his wounds from Eddie would have him feeling right as rain.

“I think it kind of is your fault,” Eddie mused. “I’m pretty sure they don’t just throw darts at a size chart when choosing your shirt size.”

“No, no, it’s true. I’ve witnessed it with my own two eyes. Bobby did his best, but his aim was off just ever so slightly. It was a real tragedy,” Buck bantered.

Eddie giggled at Buck’s antics and replied sarcastically, “Wow, you’re such a martyr, Buck. I’m truly in awe of your sacrifices. What would the people of LA do without your obscene biceps?”

Obscene biceps? That’s certainly one way to put it. It struck Buck at that moment that he was once again flirting with Eddie, and he was flirting back . It might not be the best decision for his sanity or his fragile heart, but Buck couldn’t help wanting it to continue for as long as possible.

Buck winked, hoping his blush was covered up by the darkness of the loft, and flirtatiously vowed, “All for you, Eds. You just let me know when and where.”

Eddie took it in stride and smirked, “Seems like it’s here and now, Buck. I’ve already got my hands under your shirt, don’t I?” As if to emphasize his point, Eddie let his hands slide over the expanse of his back, trailing up and down and giving Buck goosebumps from the feather-light touch. 

The touch and Eddie’s flirtations sent Buck’s heart aflutter as all his attention was stolen by the sensation of Eddie’s hands on his back and cataloging Eddie’s face. Even in the dim lighting, Buck could make out his facial expressions, and he watched Eddie observe the outline of his hands and arms underneath Buck’s shirt. He must’ve been distracted for too long because Eddie’s attention slipped away from Buck’s back and to his face as if waiting for Buck to say something. He floundered—all his brains had turned to mush after having Eddie’s attention refocused on him. Buck wasn’t sure how he held conversations with the gorgeous, perfect man kneeling beside him. 

“Cat got your tongue?”

“If you want to label yourself as a cat, you know I’d support you, right?” Buck teased.

“Ha. Ha. Very funny, Buckley.” Eddie rolled his eyes and retracted his hands from Buck’s shirt, pinching Buck’s side with his left hand, making Buck jolt and roll to protect his side from Eddie’s tickling. He would’ve been successful if he hadn’t rolled onto Eddie’s hand, trapping it beneath him. Buck was now lying on his right side, facing the back of the couch, feeling a distinctly 5-fingered appendage splayed out on his waist. “Hey! Watch it, you’re going to undo all my hard work if you keep jerking your shoulder around.”

“You knew that was going to happen when you decided to pinch my waist!” Buck accused, glaring at Eddie.

Eddie disputed, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Buck rolled over onto his back, trapping Eddie’s arm further under his body, and said, “You’re a filthy liar, Eddie Diaz.”

Eddie turned his doe eyes at Buck and replied, “Will it help if I say I missed that while I was in El Paso?”

It did help, actually, but he couldn’t tell Eddie that. He’d already acted embarrassingly enough during this whole conversation. Buck pushed up on his elbows, attempting to give Eddie enough space to pull his arm free from underneath him, but Eddie’s hand stayed pressed against his back even as part of it lifted. He made eye contact with Eddie, who had a stupidly cute pleading expression on his face, and his resolve crumbled. Buck looked at Eddie with such fondness in his eyes, he was unsure how Eddie hadn’t figured him out yet and conceded, “Maybe a little.”

Eddie flashed him a smile, knowing he’d won and pinched Buck’s side one more time, much to Buck’s dismay, before standing and groaning as his knees popped. “Damn, that floor is unforgiving. Remind me to get a pillow next time,” Eddie smirked before continuing. “I’m gonna go back to sleep before we’re called out again. You should join me—your shoulder feels better, right?”

Buck nodded his agreement and stood up from the couch, stretching out his arms before following Eddie across the loft. 

As they walked down the stairs, Buck said, “Thanks, Eddie. Next time it’s your turn for the massage, yeah?”

“Whatever you want, Buck,” Eddie hummed.

There were a lot of things Buck wanted but wasn’t sure he could have. Eddie was number one on the list. Buck wasn’t sure if he was losing his mind these past few weeks, or if Eddie wasn’t as unattainable as he thought. Buck trailed behind Eddie into the bunk room, boring his eyes into the back of Eddie’s head. Sure, they had always had some jokingly flirtatious conversations, but it felt like it was happening more frequently than usual following Eddie’s return from El Paso. Buck resolved to figure it out sooner or later, as he slipped back into his bed.

Buck easily fell asleep with his freshly massaged shoulder and the calming sound of Eddie’s breathing near his head.

He could save the sleuthing for another day.

***

The next time Eddie decided to test Buck’s fortification was a 48-off over the weekend. 

Since the Diazes returned to LA, Buck had been excited to drag them out to the aquarium—one of their old haunts. He bought tickets for the three of them at least a week in advance in preparation for one of the best days Buck had anticipated in a long time. He woke up with a pep in his step and made a full breakfast spread for the occasion. The smell of bacon, eggs, and cinnamon-buttered toast filled the hallways and crevices of their house and lured Eddie and Chris from their beds. Sometimes their similarities were too much for Buck to handle—it filled his heart to see them both enter the kitchen, rubbing their eyes and fighting off a large yawn before seating themselves at the table.

Buck strode from his place in the kitchen to the coffee machine and placed Eddie’s coffee in front of the bleary-eyed man.

“Mmm, thanks, Buck,” Eddie said after drinking a mouthful of the warm coffee. 

Buck just hummed in response as he began plating the food—one piece of toast, three strips of bacon, and a healthy side of scrambled eggs. Once he had delivered the plated food to his two Diaz boys, he grabbed the maple syrup and slid it across the table to Christopher as he sat down.

Christopher voiced his gratitude and dug into the food placed before him. After shoveling the eggs and toast into his mouth, he casually mentioned, “I’m so excited to see Dylan today, I haven’t seen him since I left, and he moved schools.”

Buck buffered for a moment, processing the information. “Wait, today? I thought that was tomorrow?”

“No, it’s always been today.”

Buck groaned and dropped his head into his hands.

Eddie finally spoke up, more awake than he was previously, “What is it, Buck?”

Buck answered, his speech muffled from his hands, “I thought his hangout was tomorrow, and I got tickets for the aquarium today.” 

“Oh,” Eddie responded, “well, we can just reschedule for a different day, no big deal.”

Buck dragged his hands down his face, looked at Eddie, and acknowledged, “I know, I know. I was just looking forward to it, that’s all. I feel like it’s been so long since we’ve done something, just the three of us.”

Chris interjected into the conversation, “So, just go today? I know it won’t be the same because I won’t be there, but after you drop me off at Dylan’s, you and Dad could go to the aquarium.” Chris shrugged his shoulders like the solution was simple, but then glanced at Buck and continued, “You still have to buy those new tickets, though. I am going to the aquarium.”

Feeling less distraught about the situation, Buck laughed and reached over to ruffle Chris’s hair despite his protests. “Yeah, you’re right, Superman. What do you say, Eddie? Want to go to the aquarium with me?”

Eddie simply sipped his coffee and said, “You’re an idiot.”

Buck pulled an offended face and threw his hand over his heart. “You wound me, Diaz.”

Christopher murmured something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like, “You’re both idiots, I can’t believe I have to deal with this.”

After consulting with the calendar on the fridge and Chris and Eddie, Buck pulled out his laptop to buy more tickets for the aquarium three weeks later. Buck wished it could be sooner, but their days off and Christopher’s school and after-school activities didn’t align. Once the tickets were bought for a day without any other plans, Christopher headed to his bedroom to change and get ready for his hangout with Dylan, and pack a sleepover bag. Buck and Eddie followed his lead, getting dressed and prepared for the aquarium.

In the car to Dylan’s house, Chris kept rambling on in the backseat, and the familiarity of the action made Buck smile. Chris had been quieter in his older age, usually opting to text his friends or read his newest book, instead of talking to them, letting them converse by themselves in the front seat. Chris’s excitement for the day bled into Buck, and he found himself looking even more forward to the aquarium. Buck had learned so much since they had last gone, and Eddie would be receiving the spiel today. He’d have to repeat it for Chris three weeks later.

They pulled up to Dylan’s house and bid Chris goodbye, telling him they’d see him tomorrow, and they loved him. Once Chris was safely inside with Dylan, Buck pulled out of their driveway and started towards the aquarium. The drive was estimated to be about an hour and twenty minutes; Dylan’s house was in the opposite direction from the aquarium. Long drives with Eddie were better than with anyone else. They could talk, sing, listen to music, and be comfortable doing it all; there was no obligation to entertain, they just enjoyed being in each other's company.

Buck was focused on driving down the 405. The cars were moving slowly in the traffic, only 30 mph at any given moment until they were stopped again. Buck wasn’t sure why the traffic was worse than usual today, but he wouldn’t complain about extra alone time with Eddie. They were mindlessly chatting when their lane started to pick up, seemingly having escaped the worst of the traffic. That’s when a car, coming fast up beside them, cut in front of them way too close to Buck’s Jeep, and promptly hit the brakes when there was nowhere else to go. 

Buck’s heart sped up in his chest, feeling the adrenaline rush through his veins as he slammed on the brakes to avoid hitting the car in front of them. At the same time, Buck threw his arm out across Eddie’s chest as an extra precaution in addition to the seatbelt. Buck heard the honk from the cars behind him as he also cursed at the asshole who cut in front of them. 

After easing off the brakes and keeping a safe distance from the volatile-driving car, Buck glanced over at Eddie to make sure he was unharmed. “You’re okay?” Buck scanned him up and down while awaiting his answer.

“Yeah, I’m good,” Eddie reassured him. “I’m glad that nothing bad happened. That was close,” Eddie finished with a nervous chuckle.

Finally allowing himself to calm down, Buck took in a couple of deep breaths—in through the nose, out through the mouth—while keeping his eyes on the road, even more focused than before. It was then that Buck realized his right arm was still plastered across Eddie’s chest, rising up and down with the movements of Eddie’s chest.

Before Buck could remove his arm, Eddie brought his left hand up and grabbed Buck’s arm, dragging it from his chest to rest on top of Eddie’s thigh. Buck’s palm was now resting flat, turned towards the ceiling of the Jeep. Buck’s breath stuttered silently as Eddie slipped his right hand into Buck’s open palm, his left hand still grasping Buck’s forearm over his jacket. 

Buck wanted to stare at their conjoined hands for hours, but was forced to watch the road instead. He felt like he was going crazy. There was no way that Eddie kept touching him so not casually, but Eddie hadn’t said anything about somehow miraculously liking men ever , so Buck was at a loss. He didn’t think that he would be thinking about this in a platonic sense if it were anyone else, both single and available. Eddie was single, but was he available? Buck didn’t know. He wasn’t sure that he wanted to know. What if Eddie still wasn’t interested in him, but came back from Texas needing more physical reassurance? Not that Buck wouldn’t love to do that for him, but he thinks he might be signing his death warrant at the same time if it meant nothing other than I need some reassurance from my best friend Buck! and not I really want to touch the love of my life . 

Buck still hadn’t said a word when Eddie squeezed his hand twice in quick succession and flashed him a small smile. As if the two pumps of his hand hit Buck’s restart button, he felt as if his senses came back online and were rebooted. Buck felt hyper-focused on Eddie’s hand in his. He felt Eddie’s calluses against his and the feeling made him shiver. The hand resting on his forearm slid down his jacket closer to the hem of his sleeve, until his fingers pulled up the edge, slipping his fingers beneath the jacket to rest on the bare skin of Buck’s wrist. The backs of his fingers caressed the smooth skin resting over Buck’s veins.

The only thing that Buck could even think about was: Oh my god. Eddie’s holding my hand. Oh my god. He’s holding my hand. Oh my god. Eddie is holding my hand. What does one even do with this information? Buck can’t just forget that his brain now holds the information of what Eddie’s hand feels like in his. Eddie chose to hold his hand, instead of letting Buck retract it after throwing it across his chest as an instinct. Not that Buck has never clasped Eddie’s in his before, but that was always a handshake for a bet, or them pulling each other up from the floor; this is different. Eddie’s holding his hand to hold his hand, no ulterior motive, no one else to witness it except Buck and his traitorous heart.

What’s even more preposterous to Buck is that Eddie didn’t let go of his hand, not even for a second. He just continued chatting with Buck like this wasn’t a heart-stopping, world-ending turn of events. Though Buck hadn’t wrecked the car earlier, he sure as hell had a better chance now, now that Eddie had stolen his attention from the road with just a couple of inches of skin pressed against Buck’s. It certainly didn’t help that Buck was only left with one hand to drive.

He spent the rest of the car ride to the aquarium feeling like he was permanently holding his breath. If someone took his heart rate for the remainder of the trip, they might tell you he had a heart condition, or ask if high blood pressure ran in the family.

When Buck finally pulled into the aquarium’s parking lot, he felt like he had run a marathon. Buck stole a glance at Eddie, and to Buck’s chagrin, he didn’t look any worse for wear; there were no outward signs of Eddie feeling any sort of non-platonic way about holding his hand for the past half an hour.

After parking, Eddie disentangled his hand from Buck’s nonchalantly and hopped out of the car before Buck could even figure out what was happening. 

In retrospect, Buck wasn’t sure that he ever caught up.

Buck dragged Eddie to the Frogs: Facing a Changing World exhibit, starting with the Pacific Tree Frog (Pseudacris regilla) and then to the Red-backed Poison Frog (Ranitomeya reticulata). Buck was excited to see the Solomon Island Leaf Frog (Ceratobatrachus guentheri), which had been missing the last time he was at the aquarium.

Buck wasted no time visiting and peppering Eddie with tons of fun facts about the Jellyfish exhibit, the Coral Reef exhibit, and the Northern Pacific Gallery. Buck talked and talked, frequently glancing over at Eddie as he rambled, finding the man smiling at Buck and nodding along. Occasionally, Eddie would chime in with a fact that Buck hadn’t heard before and would be questioned thoroughly until Buck knew where Eddie had learned it, so he could also read or watch it.

Hours had passed, and they were finishing off the day with Shark Lagoon. The usually packed exhibit had cleared out slightly now that so many families with young kids had gotten tired, hungry, or grouchy. Buck and Eddie weaved through the displays, occasionally stopping at the interactive displays to learn something new or to touch the Blue Spotted Rays in the touch pools. They gradually made their way to the glass tunnel through the sharks’ tank, which Buck had noticed was Eddie’s favorite part. He wanted to end the day at the aquarium on a good note for Eddie. Buck wanted to make him happy all the time.

At the entrance to the tunnel, Buck encouraged Eddie to walk in first, mostly for selfish purposes. If Eddie was in front of him, then he didn’t need to make a fool out of himself by looking back at Eddie every other second to catalog his face. As Eddie walked under the tunnel, his mouth slightly parted, and the glimmering streaks of sunlight refracted through the water and cast a bluish glow on his face. The sharks and fish swam overhead, and Eddie tracked them in the water.

There were others in the tunnel, not many, but Buck had no issue tuning them out to focus entirely on Eddie. When Eddie turned back around to smile at Buck and point out a cool-looking fish, Buck couldn’t even make himself act like he wasn’t staring. Buck caught up to Eddie in the tunnel and took his place by Eddie’s side. Buck was grateful that Eddie didn’t seem eager to call attention to his staring problem, probably still too enraptured by the fish.

Eddie beamed, “Buck, we’ve gotta get a picture of these fish. They’re so pretty.” 

The said fish were lazily swimming in circles next to the glass of the tunnel. They both had an array of colors splotched on their medium-sized bodies, the coral in the background matching some of their colors. The fish seemed to be playing with each other, almost as if they were dancing to a rhythm only they could hear. 

Buck grabbed his phone from his back pocket and snapped a picture of the fish through the glass before flipping the camera and motioning for Eddie to come here. Buck said, “Here, let’s get a picture with them, too.” He held the camera out in front of them, trying and failing to get both them and the fish into the frame.

He was starting to get frustrated when an older woman passed by them, admiring the surroundings, before she noticed the struggle the two men were having. She offered up her services, “Would you boys like me to take a picture of you both?”

Her offer startled Buck briefly before he quickly thanked her and handed over his phone, offering a smile and explaining, “If you don’t mind, we were trying to get those two fish in the background of the photo.”

She waved a hand at them. “Of course, I don’t mind at all! Now you boys get together all right?”

The woman brought the camera up, poised to take the picture, while Buck and Eddie pressed their sides together. Buck slung his left arm around the back of Eddie’s shoulders and rested the palm of his hand on Eddie’s upper arm. Since Eddie’s right arm was now restricted by Buck’s arm, he slid his arm around Buck’s back, tracing along the line where his shirt and pants met. His fingers pushed Buck’s shirt to the side as they traveled across to his waist, and Buck was hyper-focused the moment Eddie’s fingers stopped touching cloth, but transferred to the smooth skin of his waist. The movement tickled on the sensitive skin of his lower back, and Buck could’ve survived if Eddie hadn’t continued moving his hand until it settled on his hip, and Eddie’s fingers hadn’t slipped beneath the waistband of his pants. Buck thought he might have an aneurysm, or simply drop dead from a malfunctioning heart at any second.

Buck could feel Eddie’s fingers against the waistband of his boxers, and despite his hopes of getting into Eddie’s pants and vice versa, he was wholly unprepared for that time to come at the aquarium, in the light of day, while getting a picture taken by some nice, random woman.

Unable to stop himself from reacting, Buck’s fingers tightened on Eddie’s upper arm, and he sent a borderline panicked glance at Eddie, who looked completely at ease. What even is his life?

The moment the woman spoke once more, Buck was dragged harshly back into reality—it had only been a few seconds since Eddie had snuck his fingers beneath the waistband of his pants, and now his fingers were brushing back and forth against the covered skin of his hip. God help him. She exclaimed, “You two are just too cute!” She continued to snap pictures while Buck felt her words hit him like a truck.

Buck stumbled over his words in his rush to explain, “Oh, oh, um. We’re not– Um. Thanks, but–” He cut off his stuttering words when Eddie moved his left arm from his side and placed his hand on Buck’s chest. Buck thought the aneurysm was probably only a couple of seconds away from setting in. The hand curved around his pectoral, only separated by his shirt, stole all of his attention, and his head ducked ever so slightly so Buck could stare at it, eyes wide. A blush broke out across his cheeks as Buck was assaulted by Eddie’s proximity.

Eddie patted his chest twice and slightly shook his head in amusement. “Don’t mind him,” Eddie said. “Thank you, we appreciate it.”

The nice woman smiled back at Eddie and snapped a couple more pictures before she gushed, “Oh! Why don’t you give him a kiss on the cheek? The picture would look amazing with this background, and the two fish are still sticking around!”

Before Buck could open his mouth to protest again, Eddie answered first. “That’s a great idea. Come here, Buck.” The hand resting on his chest left its place before it landed on the opposite side of his face. His head was ducked slightly, still reeling from the hand that was on his chest. The little brain-function power he had left was drained completely from him when he felt Eddie’s lips press against his left cheek. Buck was certain that the moment Eddie looked at these photos later, he would be able to see his feelings plain on Buck’s face. His face felt hot, and he could only assume that he was sporting a raging blush that would be all too noticeable in the pictures. Buck’s eyes were wide in surprise, and his mouth had slightly dropped open, despite the verbal confirmation Eddie had given before pressing his lips to Buck’s face.

Buck was broken from his reverie at the loss of Eddie’s touch everywhere except his side, as Eddie reached out to take Buck’s phone from the woman and thank her for taking their pictures.

Eddie stood beside Buck, his right hand still unmoved, and swiped through the photos the woman had taken. “Man, some of these are good. I’m impressed.”

Buck hadn’t managed to look at any of the photos, still frozen in time when Eddie first touched him. Dazedly, Buck responded, “Wow. Yep. So good.”

Buck heard a low chuckle pass through Eddie’s lips, and Eddie finally released his hold on Buck and stepped back from where he had still been pressed against the side of Buck’s body. Eddie held out Buck’s phone for him to take, but after a few seconds, Buck still had made no move to take it back from him. Shrugging, Eddie slid Buck’s phone into his back pocket and turned to look at the fish once more.

After a few moments, Buck felt like he had been rebooted and was finally able to move again. He wasn’t entirely convinced that had happened, but he supposed there was proof enough sitting in Eddie’s back pocket. He stepped up beside Eddie in the tunnel and stared out into the water before him. When Buck finally found his voice, he turned his head to study Eddie—he was admiring the sea life with a hint of a smile on his face, and his eyes held mirth. Buck wasn’t sure what was going on with Eddie, or what he meant by all of this touching, but it was hard to keep himself from wanting Eddie. Eddie, who had become his best friend, was an inextricable part of Buck’s life. Eddie, who had let Buck into his life and family with Christopher and had never made Buck feel unwanted or unwelcome. Eddie, who joked with Buck and laughed with him, who made him smile through the hard times, and who Buck did the same for.

Eddie, who always felt inevitable. 

Buck was willing to allow Eddie to play this game until he was ready. He could wait forever, but that didn’t mean Buck couldn’t take a page out of Eddie’s book and tease him right back. After all, he couldn’t let Eddie have all the fun. Happy with his new course of action, Buck grinned at Eddie.

Eddie turned to look at Buck, who was still grinning, maybe a little too widely at Eddie. He cocked his head and asked, “What is it?”

Buck shook his head at Eddie and responded, “Nothing.” He reached down and laced his fingers with Eddie’s, watching Eddie’s reaction—his eyes darted downwards, raised an eyebrow, and had a bashful look, but didn’t say anything else. “Come on, let’s go home,” Buck finished as he started walking away, tugging Eddie’s hand to make him follow.

Eddie took the hand-holding in stride and gently swung their hands in between them as they walked back to the car, chatting about the exhibits and what they would need to do when they were here with Chris in a couple of weeks. It was only when they had returned to the car that Buck let go of Eddie’s hand to get into the driver’s seat, while Eddie got into the passenger side of the car. 

Buck turned on the car as Eddie fiddled with the music, selecting a playlist. Usually, Buck could make a pretty accurate guess, but he was somewhat at a loss. A second later, Buck ran out of time to make his guess as the sound of music poured from the speakers and filled the car. Eddie simply handed his phone to Buck so he could inspect which playlist he had chosen. Buck was partially surprised to note that Eddie had put on his “Feel Good” playlist, which was generally reserved for days when Eddie was feeling extra happy. Buck hummed at Eddie’s choice and put the car in reverse to back out of the parking spot and start the drive home.

He only hesitated slightly on the gear shift after switching the car into drive, before moving his right hand not back to the steering wheel, but to Eddie’s thigh instead. Buck forced himself to relax and act calm as he heard Eddie take in a sharp breath that was held for several seconds. It seemed as if their game of not mentioning these less-than-platonic gestures would continue as Eddie said nothing and instead let his legs spread further, making Buck’s hand travel further to the inside of his thigh. Buck lightly squeezed the thigh resting underneath his hand, mostly to confirm for himself that his hand was actually on Eddie’s thigh, but the side effect of messing with Eddie wasn’t unwelcome.

Buck sneaked a look at Eddie under the guise of checking his right mirror, and saw the pretty blush fanned across Eddie’s cheeks. 

Mission accomplished. 

Eddie wasn’t the only one who could play this game. Buck needed to retaliate. Was retaliation the correct word when Buck was just going to be flirting and teasing Eddie excessively? Maybe not, but Buck was determined to win this secret little game they were playing. Eddie might have a head start, but who doesn’t love an underdog?

Buck’s hand didn’t leave Eddie’s thigh the entire way back home.

***

It was one of those rare nights when Buck and Eddie’s plans didn't coincide.

The shift following their visit to the aquarium, Bobby had proposed a night out with the team at their regular bar, the night after they got off from work. Spontaneously made plans rarely happened, but it was one of those times where it just magically worked out. For everyone except Buck, that is. As much as he would love to go hang out with the team, he saw them all the time at work, and he already had made plans to hang out with Jee and Maddie and cook them dinner. When Chimney had told Maddie about their plans, she offered to move their hangout to another night, but Buck waved her off.

The night with Maddie and Jee-Yun was a lot of fun. Buck went over to their house around 4:00 in the afternoon and mainly entertained Jee, while Maddie finished a couple of chores around the house. She briefly popped in to talk with Buck and comment on her daughter’s imagined stories with her toys, until she was finished about 45 minutes later. Maddie sat down on the couch with a glass of wine and smiled at her daughter and little brother, bonding and playing together. 

By the time Buck started to make dinner for the three of them, he and Jee-Yun had gone through about four aborted storylines, rife with betrayals, mischief, and love, with her dolls. Buck loved indulging her and spending time with her, even if it meant breaking his back hunched over her doll house on the floor.

Maddie migrated with him to the kitchen, leaving Jee-Yun to play with her toys, as they moved into more adult conversations. They talked about work and their friends while Buck whipped up pasta for them to eat. 

Eventually, after they ate dinner, cleaned the dishes, and Jee was put to bed, Maddie brought up the question of Eddie. She had a habit of subtly asking Buck about his relationship with Eddie, and tonight was the night Buck finally cracked.

He told her about living with the Diazes after their return, Eddie’s touches, the aquarium, and finally his decision to tease Eddie back. Maddie’s eyes had gotten wider and wider while Buck chattered about their little game, seemingly in disbelief.

Once Buck finished, Maddie shook her head and laughed. “Wow. I can’t believe you guys finally figured it out, and yet you’re both still being stupid. I can’t wait to tell Howie about this.”

“Wait, no! You can’t tell Chim about this. I’m not ready for everyone to know yet,” Buck explained. “I want to be able to figure this out with Eddie, or I suppose see who wins the game we have going on, before anyone else can interfere.” He hesitated slightly, but then said, “I mean… What's flirting a little while longer, when I know I’m going to spend the rest of my life with him? If this is what he wants to do, then I’m going to beat him at his own game.”

Maddie’s eyes softened, and she reached out across the couch to squeeze Buck’s hand. “I get it, Buck. Howie and I danced around each other for a long time until we finally admitted our feelings. That doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re acting stupid, though, but at least you and Eddie are being stupid together, I suppose.”

Buck laughed. “As long as we’re in it together, right?”

It was about an hour later when Buck finally decided to head out. He hugged Maddie and told her goodbye before hopping in his Jeep and starting the engine. Buck pulled up Eddie’s location, which was still presented as the bar, so he pulled out of the driveway and made his way to the bar.

Upon Buck’s arrival, he parked and entered the popular, well-kept establishment and scanned the room for the 118’s booth. Buck’s eyes snagged on Bobby and the crew at a table in the back, left corner. He spied the back of Eddie’s head, facing towards Hen, mid-conversation. His feet started moving of their own volition, weaving through the patrons milling about, before making eye contact with Bobby halfway to their booth. Bobby must have mentioned his presence because moments later, Eddie’s head whipped around, honing in on Buck, who was now almost to their table. Eddie leaned in to the table, almost conspiratorially, before Buck sidled up to the table and made his greetings.

“Buck!” Eddie exclaimed, louder than usual.

He smiled at Eddie’s enthusiasm and replied, “Hey, Eds.

Bobby spoke up before Eddie could continue speaking to Buck, “Hey, Buck. You kind of got here at a bad time. We were about to head out in a couple of minutes.”

Buck nodded. The information wasn’t surprising. “Oh, no worries. I wasn’t planning to stay long, just wanted to drop by for a second.”

Hen cut in and added, “Well, you know we always love to see you. Probably a good thing you’re here too, someone had a little too much to drink and was going to have to Uber home.” The smile she gave Buck was slightly unsettling, and he got the feeling that she knew something he didn’t.

Buck looked around at his friends at the table before finally settling on Eddie. “Good thing, then. How much did you have to drink, anyway? You swore off large amounts of alcohol the last time we woke up hungover to hell.”

Eddie just gave Buck a lazy smile and said, “Don’t worry about it.” 

Buck laughed at the non-answer and the slightly loopy look in Eddie’s eyes, and asked, “Are you ready to go, then? I wasn’t really planning on hanging around for long. Jee wore me out tonight.”

“Yeah, don’t I know it!” Chimney remarked. “I’ll gladly take a night off from parental duties every now and then, if you’re the one who’s getting run ragged,” he finished with a teasing grin.

Buck rolled his eyes at Chimney in good nature, before probing Eddie for his answer. 

“Yep. I’m good to go,” Eddie responded while sliding out of the booth, swaying slightly when he stood up. Buck reached out to steady him, but was quickly waved off. 

Buck and Eddie made a few more comments to the team before saying their goodbyes and heading for Buck’s Jeep. Buck inquired after Eddie’s outing with the 118 and, in return, got Eddie’s ramblings about what happened that night. His stories didn’t make the most sense temporally, but Eddie’s enthusiasm for relaying the hangout to Buck was so endearing that he didn’t tease Eddie about his lack of continuity.

Buck pulled onto their street, listening to Eddie recount something that Ravi had said, when he noticed Eddie’s truck was still parked in the driveway of their house.

 “—and then Ravi told Hen that Chimney was the one who had stolen her drink, and she cuffed him over the head, while Chim was squawking about the injustice!” 

Buck laughed at his story and hopefully answered sufficiently to Eddie’s story, while he parked his Jeep beside Eddie’s truck. In a lull of Eddie’s drunken rambling, Buck asked, “I thought you drove to the bar? Why’s your truck still here?”

Eddie focused his eyes onto Buck’s face, before looking out the window to eye his truck, and then returning his gaze to Buck. He simply hummed, “I knew you’d pick me up. Felt useless to have to go retrieve my truck tomorrow.”

He smiled at Eddie’s words, the certainty with which he said them zinged through Buck’s nervous system and settled in his bones, fortifying him. “Come on, let’s get inside.”

The only response Buck was given was Eddie groaning and petulantly throwing his head back against the headrest of the seat. “Buck,” he started, drawing out the syllables of his name, “I don’t wanna move.”

Buck rolled his eyes at Eddie’s antics and hopped out of the car, quickly unlocked the front door, and then returned to open the passenger car door. Eddie was still in the same spot, with his eyes closed, looking very peaceful, almost as if he were about to go to sleep. “Oh, no you don’t,” Buck said while poking at Eddie’s side. “You’ve gotta get up, Eds.”

Eddie rolled his head against the seat to look at Buck, and sleepily whined, “Why can’t you just carry me? You used to do it for Chris all the time.” He pouted at Buck, supposedly in the hopes of getting what he wanted.

Buck quirked an eyebrow at Eddie. “Chris was a child. And hundreds of pounds lighter than you, might I add.”

Eddie frowned and questioned, “Are you calling me fat, Buck?”

“That is a completely different sentence.”

Eddie continued pouting at Buck and lamented, “Wow. I can’t believe this. Betrayed by my own best friend,” he threw a hand over his heart, “all because he won’t pick me up and take me inside. I’ll never recover. Just leave me here to die, Buck. Maybe I’ll survive the night.”

Buck laughed, “Okay, Eddie, stop being dramatic. Get up.”

“No, Buck. This is where I live now,” he said, and spread out his limbs in the passenger seat.

Buck sighed and widened his stance. “All right, you win.” He bent over, leaning into Eddie’s torso, and maneuvered Eddie over his shoulder, before carefully pulling him out of the car in a fireman’s carry. Once he had cleared the car, he decided to bring Eddie inside before shutting the car door, unwilling to accidentally hurt Eddie or knock him into the car during his attempt to shut the door.

Eddie simply made a noise of surprise at suddenly having his head turned upside down, his arms hanging beside his head. As Buck started towards the house, he felt Eddie’s limp arms hitting his back. Even though Buck had his hands splayed across the back of Eddie’s thighs to hold him in place on his shoulder, he had to remind himself that Eddie was drunk and he needed to keep it respectful. Their game could wait until morning.

As Buck crossed the threshold of the house, he felt Eddie push against his ass with his hands. Couldn’t he ever get a break?! “Eddie, cut that out!” Buck said as he quickly set Eddie down on the couch. He pointed a finger at Eddie. “Stay. I’ll be right back.” He made a swift trip back outside to shut the door and lock the car, before making his way back inside and locking up the front door as well. When he turned back around to talk to Eddie, he was nowhere to be found. He called out, “Eddie?” Upon hearing no response, he walked through the living room to check the kitchen and found Eddie rooting through the pantry, only to pull out chips with a satisfied look on his face.

Eddie opened the chip bag and munched on a few chips before holding the bag out to Buck. “Want some?” Eddie asked around a mouthful of chips.

“What? No. You need to put the chips away and get ready for bed. You need to sleep, that hangover is gonna be killer in the morning.”

Eddie set the chips down on the table and made his way over to Buck and embraced him in a hug. Eddie tightened his arms around Buck to a degree that made him concerned about getting enough air. Eddie responded, “Maybe, but you’d take care of me, so does it really matter?”

Buck felt a little breathless, this time unrelated to the tightness of Eddie’s hug. “Yeah, I would take care of you.”

Eddie pulled back to beam at Buck’s face. “See! I told you!” Eddie separated from Buck completely. “Now, I want more chips.”

His words dragged Buck out of his stupor, and he objected, “Hey! That doesn’t mean you get to have more chips. It’s bedtime.” Buck punctuated his words by grabbing Eddie’s wrist and guiding him towards their bedroom with a hand on his lower back. Once in the bedroom, Buck continued, “You need to change into pajamas.” 

Eddie sighed dejectedly, “Okay.” He stepped towards the dresser to grab his pajama pants, but almost brained himself after tripping on a stray shoe. He let out a yelp as he tumbled to the floor and lay there.

Buck, having also let out a shout at Eddie’s fall, rushed over to Eddie, frantically checking him for injuries. 

He didn’t fight Buck’s ministrations, and instead said, “Maybe no pajama pants. It seems like a bad omen.”

This drew Buck up short. He pointed out, “Eddie… you don’t believe in omens.”

“Tonight, I do. I am not eager to take a chunk out of my body, actually. Now help me up,” Eddie said, holding his arms out towards the ceiling, waiting for Buck to pull him off the floor. 

Buck chuckled at the drunk man lying on the floor and grabbed his hands to pull him up. “Up you go.” He easily lifted Eddie off the floor, and he didn’t let go of Buck’s hands when he was upright and stable again.

Eddie eyed Buck’s arms and disentangled his right hand from Buck’s to reach out and squeeze his bicep. “Wow. You’re, like, so strong. Did you know that?” He turned his attention from Buck’s arms back to his face, seemingly studying the flush that crawled up his neck and cheeks.

“Okay,” Buck said, drawing out the word and ignoring the question entirely. “I think that’s probably enough excitement for one night. Pajamas, now.” 

Eddie shrugged and unbuttoned his pants, before pushing them down his legs and wobbly stepping out of them. He also shucked his shirt off and inquired, “Okay. What next?”

And, God help him, Buck was really trying his hardest to keep it respectful, but Eddie was a tempting image, only about a foot in front of him. Buck had to count backward from ten in his head before he could even think about responding to Eddie. “Um, no other clothes for you?”

He shook his head, “Nope!” Eddie stepped closer to Buck, grasped his hands, and placed them on his waist. Eddie looked up at Buck under his eyelashes, fluttering them slightly. “You like me better like this, don’t you?”

Buck choked on his spit. The hard lines of muscle were spread beneath his fingers, and he could feel the rippling of Eddie’s muscles as he shifted. The Universe was just testing him at this point. Buck happened to think that the Universe’s tests should be deemed as cruel and unusual punishment, because, of course, the first time he had Eddie overtly flirting with him, practically naked in their bedroom , Buck had to reject his advances because he was drunk. Despite enjoying the sight before him and knowing that Eddie wanted him when he was sober, too, Buck didn’t want Eddie to forget each moment they spent together; he didn’t want to have an imbalance. They were equals in every aspect of their lives—partners at work, home, and co-parenting too—it only made sense that they would continue to be equal in a romantic relationship, as well. Regardless of his decision to shut all sexual advances down while Eddie was drunk, he allowed himself a couple of extra moments to rake his eyes over the tan planes of Eddie’s body. His eyes worked their way down and back up, and down once more, before turning his body to allow Eddie to pass by, using the hands on his waist to propel Eddie past him, towards the door and to the bathroom.

“Okay, time to brush our teeth!”

Eddie pouted at Buck’s avoidance of his question, but permitted Buck to steer him to the bathroom, and gave him little fuss. Due to the alcohol coursing through his body, his accuracy was a little shot, making Eddie use way more toothpaste than necessary, when the first glob had dropped from the tube right into the sink. Buck simply turned on the water and swiped the toothpaste off the sink, and let the water run over his thumb to let the toothpaste wash away.

Now that Eddie was brushing his teeth with few mistakes to be made, Buck picked up his toothbrush and set about brushing his teeth, as well. Eddie finished brushing his teeth and rinsed out his mouth, before he turned a pearly white smile at Buck, displaying the newly-brushed teeth.

Buck laughed and said, “Good job, Eds.” The rush of affection that had been running through his veins all night was amplified by Eddie’s silly attitude. It made Buck want to wrap Eddie in his arms and never let him go. Eddie always held himself to such a high standard, so seeing him be so unabashedly goofy and playful was always a delight. Buck thought he probably got the most glimpses into Eddie’s silly side, apart from Chris, and he cherished every second. Holding himself back from engulfing Eddie in a hug, Buck spun him around towards the door and escorted him back to the bedroom. 

Eddie beelined for their bed and flopped down onto it, starfishing across the mattress. Buck knew he most likely wouldn’t be inclined to move again, so he took the liberty of maneuvering Eddie onto his side of the bed and getting him settled beneath the covers. Buck made to leave the room, but was stopped by a hand on his wrist holding him back.

“Where’re you goin’?” Eddie slurred, the excitement of the night catching up to him.

“I’ll be back in just a minute. I’m gonna go grab you some medicine for the morning,” Buck explained, still trapped in Eddie’s hold.

Eddie looked disgruntled at this information, but said nothing in response. Buck padded down the hallway to grab the bottle of pain medicine and then fill up a glass of water to place on Eddie’s bedside table. 

Buck returned with the water, fully expecting Eddie to have passed out in the few minutes he was gone, but was surprised to find Eddie still lying awake. He placed the medicine on the nightstand as Eddie mumbled, “Oh good. You’re back. Come to bed now.”

“I’ll be right there. One sec,” Buck replied. He quickly changed out of his clothes and into his pajamas. He spared a quick moment for his nighttime shower, lamenting the loss of the hot water against his skin, washing away the day before bed. A moment later, he climbed into the left side of the bed and was greeted by Eddie rolling over to invade his space. “Whatcha doin’ there, Eddie?”

“Getting comfy.”

“Right…” Eddie was, in fact, getting comfy. He had snuggled into Buck’s space, under his arm, and was resting his head on his chest. Buck could see Eddie’s head rising and falling with each breath he took. Eddie quickly fell into a restful sleep, the alcohol aiding his fast descent into unconsciousness.

Buck figured that a sleeping Eddie was as harmless as he could get at the moment, and let down his guard to enjoy the closeness of his best friend and love of his life. He pulled Eddie closer and let sleep take him as well, and drifted off to the sound of Eddie’s steady breaths and the rhythmic rising and falling of his chest pressed against Buck.

***

In the morning when Buck awoke, Eddie was still clinging to him and burrowed his face into Buck’s neck as if he was trying to escape the light of the morning which slotted through the gaps of the curtains. He reached an arm out to grab his phone on the nightstand, noting the time, and turned off the alarm due to go off in twenty minutes. He needed to take his Jeep to get an oil change, and he’d already put it off long enough. Buck figured if he snuck out now, he could make it back before Eddie woke up; he always seemed to sleep longer when copious amounts of alcohol were involved.

Buck detached Eddie from him as unobtrusively as possible and slipped out of the bed. He put on sweatpants and a hoodie and quietly shut the door to the bedroom behind him. Buck forewent breakfast and instead snatched his keys from the table beside the door and slipped out into the brisk morning air.

The drive to the mechanic was quick and devoid of most traffic, and the oil change took about twenty minutes before he was on his way back to the house. Buck debated making a pit stop to grab breakfast on the way back, but decided he wanted to get back before Eddie woke up, or at least before he had gotten out of bed. He pulled his Jeep into the driveway and eased his way through the front door, making sure not to make too much noise. He set his keys back on the table beside the door and slipped off his shoes. Buck carefully walked down the hallway and cracked the door open to peek in and see if Eddie was awake yet.

Upon opening the door, he saw Eddie slightly lift up his head, as if to check who was at the door, but he let out a groan before he made it all the way up. At Eddie’s signs of life, Buck pushed through the doorway and shut the door behind him. Since Buck’s departure from the bed, Eddie had migrated over into the space Buck had occupied this morning. Eddie aborted his attempt to raise his head and instead reached out a hand to beckon Buck back to the bed. He sat down on the right side of the bed and grabbed the Advil and the glass of water from the bedside table.

“Here, Eds. Take some Advil.”

Eddie rolled over onto his back, now closer to Buck than before. He stuck out his tongue for the pill, and Buck rolled his eyes as he placed the pill on Eddie’s outstretched tongue. Eddie looked like he was contemplating the idea of dry swallowing the pill so he didn’t have to lift his head from the pillow, but Buck wasn’t going to have it.

“Up,” Buck instructed. 

Eddie turned pleading and bleary eyes on him. “My head hurts.”

“What do you think the pill is for?” Buck ribbed. He decided Eddie wasn’t likely to do it himself, so he slid his left hand underneath Eddie’s head and tilted his head upright. Buck brought the water glass to his lips and said, “I’ve got you.”

Eddie gulped down the Advil with the water, and once he had swallowed it all, he rested his head on the pillow once again. 

Eddie hummed his thanks as Buck twisted away from him to set the glass back on the nightstand, but he didn’t get very far until Eddie was wrapping himself around Buck’s torso. His arms encircled his waist, and Buck felt Eddie rest his forehead between his hip and spine on his lower back. Despite being taken aback, Buck quickly recovered and started gently rubbing the arms that had trapped him in the twisted position. He let Eddie rest in that position for a moment longer and then removed the arms from his waist. Eddie let out sounds of protest, and Buck assured him he was only readjusting. Buck slid down from his sitting position until his head was resting on Eddie’s pillow, and he pulled Eddie under his arm, letting him rest his head on his chest. 

Buck slowly rubbed his arm up and down across Eddie’s back in a soothing motion, hoping to drain the headache through his touch. He must have dozed off while lying there, because when he woke up, Eddie was no longer tucked between his arm and chest, but had somehow manipulated Buck’s body underneath his arm instead. 

Buck brought a hand up to rub at his eyes and asked, “What time is it?”

He could feel the rumbling of Eddie’s chest beneath his cheek when he replied, “It’s around ten.”

“How’s your head feeling?”

Eddie’s arm curled Buck further into his body. “It’s feeling good. The medicine kicked in while I was sleeping.”

“And how exactly did we get in this position? Last time I checked, it was the other way around.”

“I’ll never tell my secrets, Buckley.”

“Fine,” Buck smirked. He secured his arm around Eddie’s waist and dug his fingers into Eddie’s side, tickling him mercilessly. 

Eddie yelped and started squirming in an attempt to free himself from the relentless torture. He was thrashing around on the bed like a fish out of water, and only stopped once he got Buck in a headlock. It should’ve been an easy solution since Buck had been wedged underneath his arm already, but it appeared as if the tickling had momentarily stolen Eddie’s problem-solving skills. He had wrapped his arms around Buck’s neck, holding him firmly in a headlock, with no chance of escape. Buck was still fruitlessly trying to tickle him to free himself, but Buck’s ministrations had lost their effect; thus, he was trapped.

“Tap out,” Eddie commanded.

Buck wasn’t inclined to listen to Eddie’s demands and still plied at the strong arms keeping him still.

After a moment with no response from Buck, Eddie said, again, “Tap out, Buckley.”

Buck would’ve hung his head in defeat if he were able, but instead, Buck tapped three times on Eddie’s stomach—his formal surrender. 

Eddie loosened his hold around Buck’s head and goaded, “Good choice, Buckley.”

Despite being released from Eddie’s grip, he lay his head back down on his chest and hid his pink cheeks from Eddie’s sight. “Yeah, yeah. I get it. We can’t all be underground fighting champions,” Buck snarked.

A finger came up and pushed on his forehead until Buck’s head was far enough back to make eye contact with Eddie. He quirked an eyebrow at Buck. “Uh-uh. You don’t get to sass me when you’re the one who started it.” The finger departed from Buck’s forehead with an extra push, seemingly to emphasize Eddie’s point. “You don’t get to be a sore loser.”

Buck scowled and said petulantly, “I’m not.”

Eddie dragged out the syllables of his response, “Right. Sure, you’re not. That expression says otherwise.” He brought his thumb to Buck’s face to smooth over the wrinkled skin between his eyebrows. 

The gesture was so tender that Buck felt a little like crying. Buck was (admittedly) being a little shit for the sake of annoying Eddie, and despite Eddie’s teasing he didn’t sling harsh words at Buck or think he was being genuinely childish. It was refreshing to be with someone who knew him so completely, and someone he knew so wholly right back. 

Buck gave up his pretense of displeasure and beamed at Eddie in place of speech.

For all Buck’s antics, Eddie simply chuckled at Buck and rubbed his thumb across the top of his eyebrow as it traveled to his temple and down the side of his face. Eddie grinned at Buck and said, “Let’s go eat. I’m hungry. This hangover isn’t gonna cure itself.”

“I thought you said the headache was gone,” Buck mused and lifted himself from his place on the bed.

Eddie shrugged. “It could come back.”

“We wouldn’t want that, would we?”

“Definitely not,” Eddie replied while shaking his head.

Eddie followed Buck closely down the hallway and into the kitchen. Eddie beelined to the coffee maker, while Buck took a mental stock of what they had to eat, eyeing the outside of the fridge like he could see through the closed door.

“Bagel sandwiches?” Buck inquired. “I can make them with avocado, bacon, and eggs?”

“Please,” Eddie groaned while throwing a hand over his stomach.

“Comin’ right up.” 

Buck gathered all the ingredients and turned on two of the burners. One for the bacon and one for the eggs. The sizzling of the bacon, the hisses and drips from the coffee machine, and the ticking of the toaster oven set the background noise for the quiet morning. Buck leaned against the counter while he waited for the bacon to cook and crisp up and stared unabashedly at Eddie, who was still fiddling with the coffee machine and the two mugs he had pulled from the cabinet. The sunlight streamed through the kitchen windows and fell across Eddie’s face, making him squint against the bright light. Buck felt content. The familiarity and domesticity buzzed through his veins and pooled in his stomach and wrapped around his heart. It felt like the consistency of syrup—slow-moving and sticky. If Buck were to be cut open, it would take ages to spill out of the cavity, clinging to his body and too sticky to ever fully leave. Seeing Eddie just a few feet away, looking just as happy as Buck was, affirmed to Buck that he wouldn’t ever have to worry about being cut open and forcefully drained of his love for the Diazes. 

He dragged his eyes away from the love of his life and made himself focus on the bacon that was almost crispy enough for their tastes. Eddie had set the coffee down on the kitchen table after he took a sip while it was still far too hot, which left Buck listening to a sharp hiss and Eddie blowing on his coffee. 

Eddie sidled up beside Buck’s left side while he cut up an avocado and assembled the rest of the bagel sandwiches. Buck handed Eddie his plate—his own sandwich still sitting on the counter.

“Thanks, Buck. Looks delicious,” Eddie praised. Before Buck could even begin to respond, Eddie wrapped his free hand around the curve of Buck’s neck and pulled his head down and to the side and placed a kiss on the corner of his eyebrow—his birthmark. 

Buck was frozen and in dire need of a reboot. He stared blankly at the tile of the kitchen wall and felt Eddie’s hand trail along the bare skin of his neck until it left him completely, and Eddie walked over to the kitchen table.

Buck thought he was definitely losing their little game. But was that really the worst thing ever? He didn’t think so. He was highly content to let Eddie continue fucking up his fight-or-flight response and give him tachycardia from his proximity. Even though Eddie had made it pretty clear what was going on here, he hadn’t actually said the words to Buck or mentioned anything about his sexuality—if he wanted to play it somewhat safe, he would! He could let Eddie take the lead before they established what they were, and then he would knock Eddie flat on his ass with his levels of wooing and affection. 

Buck took his sandwich to the kitchen table and sat down across from Eddie. The other man was already digging into his bagel sandwich, the everything seasoning on the bagel sticking to his lips as he chewed. Buck followed his lead and bit into his late breakfast. 

Despite his thoughts about letting Eddie take the lead, he wasn’t going to be completely passive, so he stretched his legs out to the other side of the table before capturing one of Eddie’s legs with his. Buck slightly bent his knees from their stretched position, taking Eddie’s leg with him when he retreated.

Eddie smiled at him across the kitchen table with the crumbs of the bagel still stuck to his face, and Buck couldn’t ask for anything better.

***

Eddie was taking a nap, and Buck was bored.

Buck knew that Eddie had a brutal and grueling shift, and he definitely didn’t want to wake Eddie up, but he couldn’t help wanting to be around Eddie all the time. Chris was at school, so Buck couldn’t even pass the time by hanging out with him. Buck had already cycled through many potential entertainment options, including and not limited to: reading, watching Eddie’s favorite telenovela, a new documentary about the Sahara Desert, cleaning, and baking—Eddie had been sleeping for a while. Nothing held Buck’s attention, to his dismay. He had crawled out of bed about two and a half hours ago, and the signs of life from Eddie were few and far between; there was nothing to suggest Eddie would be awaking anytime soon.

Buck didn’t even have anyone to complain to about the boredom, seeing as his usual victim was dead asleep, his other friends were probably also sleeping, and his sister worked (mostly) normal shifts. He didn’t think Jee would appreciate him unloading all his woes onto her. She’d probably ask if she could paint Buck’s nails instead and cut him off halfway through. He would totally say yes, though. Which led to Buck standing outside of their shared bedroom door, staring at the wood hard enough someone would think he could see right through it.

And really, what’s the saying? If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em?

This is how Buck ended up standing in the corner of the dim room, like a villain in a horror movie, debating how best to crawl back into bed. He wanted to avoid waking Eddie at all costs—he might be desperate to talk to Eddie, but he wasn’t evil . Eddie deserved to sleep as long as he liked.

While Buck plotted the best possible course to take residence in the bed that Eddie had commandeered in his absence, Eddie started shifting on the bed. Buck went still and held his breath, hoping Eddie wouldn’t wake up from his antics and also think there was someone trying to kill him in their bedroom.

Buck supposed Eddie had started to overheat in the LA weather because he started kicking off the sheets and rolled over onto his stomach, also conveniently leaving a space for Buck to crawl into if he was careful. 

Seizing the opportunity, Buck quietly made his way around the bed and slipped under the covers in the vacated space. He lay down on his back with his head turned to the side to look at Eddie—his face was slack from sleep, and he looked so peaceful in the soft lighting of the bedroom. 

A moment later, Eddie shifted again and his leg slid higher on the bed, making almost a right angle with the bend of his knee. The new position put Eddie’s leg closer, within Buck’s reach, and the mid-thigh sleeping shorts that Eddie liked to wear during the summer rode up his thigh, exposing his tanned and muscular hamstrings. 

Buck found himself reaching out before he even registered what he was doing. Buck’s fingers made contact with the back of his thigh, and Eddie’s skin was hot to the touch. He flicked his eyes back to Eddie’s face to see if he’d woken up, but there was no recognition on his face, nor any inkling that he felt Buck’s touch.

Unable to help himself, Buck trailed his index finger through the sparse hair on the back of his thigh, dipping under the hem of the shorts. He began tracing shapes and words onto the skin, starting with triangles and stars, and moving on to tracing hearts all over his skin. Even in the low lighting and lack of a proper writing utensil, Buck could’ve sworn the patterned hearts were visible. He eventually scribbled his name on the back of Eddie’s thigh—his own personal claim. He liked the idea that even if no one knew, Buck would have his name like a brand on Eddie. Even if no one could see it, Buck knew if anyone tried to touch Eddie, they would be able to feel it—feel the full force of Buck’s love for Eddie—and they’d stay away. 

Buck had no idea how long he had been tracing his name into Eddie’s thigh, over and over in the same spot to make it seep into the skin and take root, but when he glanced at Eddie’s face once more, still absentmindedly trailing his finger on his skin, Eddie’s eyes were trained on him. He still looked tired, and he hadn’t moved at all or given Buck any indication that he’d been awake. His eyes were half shut as he gazed at Buck with his head still squashed into his pillow. Buck was taken aback, and his finger froze on Eddie’s leg where it had once again slipped underneath the hem of his shorts.

Eddie just gave him a sleepy smile, closed his eyes again, and hummed, “Feels nice.” When Buck still hadn’t restarted his movements, after a few seconds of silence, Eddie cracked open an eye and said, “Don’t stop on my account.”

So Buck continued tracing random things into Eddie’s bare skin and refrained from spelling out his name again. Eddie looked content as they lay there for minutes or hours, basking in the comfortable silence between them. Buck would have continued for hours longer if Eddie hadn’t started shifting and eventually pulled his leg away from Buck’s reach.

Now, without a purpose, Buck’s hands hovered in the air while he decided what to do with them, and eventually settled them on his stomach as he rolled onto his back. Buck stared at the ceiling while Eddie sat up in the bed and stretched his arms out above his head, rolling his neck out.

When Eddie moved, Buck thought he would leave the room, maybe to go to the bathroom, but instead Eddie leaned over into Buck’s line of vision. His left hand was propping him up beside Buck’s torso, and he could feel the dip in the bed where Eddie was putting his weight. 

“Hey?”

“Hi,” Eddie replied, but gave no further answer to Buck’s unspoken question.

Buck got an answer a moment later when he brought his right hand to rest over the left side of Buck’s chest—over his heart—and started writing.

It was unmistakably Eddie , being written over Buck’s heart. He knew it from the first stroke of Eddie’s finger over his shirt, which slightly shifted underneath the tracing. Buck stared at Eddie as Eddie focused his attention on his name being written on Buck’s heart; he placed such care in his touches, making sure to repeat his name in the same place each time.

Eddie’s finger stilled after another repetition of Eddie , the pad of his finger still resting on Buck’s chest where he had finished writing the e . Eddie made eye contact with Buck for a split second, and then he was moving his finger in two more characters, deviating from the carefully placed name that had penetrated Buck’s shirt and skin, all the way to his heart. 

Apostrophe. 

S.

Eddie’s.

Buck’s heart— Eddie’s heart —quickened in his chest, and he was speechless. He was sure Eddie could feel his heart leaping and beating at his ribcage, too eager to be owned by Eddie that it would crack Buck’s ribs to get to him. Buck couldn’t really contest his heart’s actions, because Buck, too, would break his ribs if it meant to be owned by Eddie— kept by Eddie.

But Eddie didn’t let on about anything he was thinking, apart from the soft smile gracing his face and the mirth in his eyes. Eddie’s right hand slipped from his chest and bracketed Buck between his arms.

Buck thought he was liable to pass out. His mind was racing through the possibilities of their positions, and the one he kept coming back to was Is Eddie about to kiss me?! Followed quickly by Eddie can’t kiss me for the first time when my breath tastes like this! He’ll never kiss me again!

Instead of kissing his lips, Eddie lowered his head down to Buck’s chest and placed a kiss over Buck’s wildly beating heart. It felt like Eddie was sealing his answer into the fabric of Buck’s soul. 

He was Eddie’s. Forever.

Eddie let his lips linger over Buck’s chest, rising and falling with Buck’s stuttered breaths. Then, he pulled away, and Buck couldn’t even look to see if Eddie had done anything else on his way out of the room, because he had frozen his eyes on the ceiling.

God help him. He wasn’t going to be able to take much more of this.

***

Buck was losing his mind. Eddie hadn’t touched him all day. Not even a brush of his hand on his lower back as Eddie passed by Buck in the kitchen. Buck woke up later than Eddie this morning, so he was greeted with an empty bed and was deprived of his usual time to cuddle with Eddie before they had to get up.

Usually, Buck was losing his mind because of the opposite, but it turns out the alternative is much worse. Even before Eddie left for Texas, there was a consistent level of affection between them. Buck thought this might have been the longest they’ve gone without touching since Eddie came back from Texas. 

They had run errands throughout the day. Going grocery shopping, cleaning the house, doing laundry, and other menial, but necessary, tasks. Since Isabel had requested Chris’s presence for the day and night, they wanted to finish the errands when they didn’t need to worry about spending time with him. The teenager had grumbled half-heartedly about not being able to hang out with his friends on a Friday night, but Buck had spied the smile on his face when they’d dropped him off at his bisabuela’s house.

Buck was in the kitchen finishing washing dishes when Eddie returned. They had needed to return to the store to grab the ingredients for an apple pie Buck said he would bring to the 118 get-together in a few days’ time. Buck suggested going another day after one of their shifts, but Eddie waved him off and argued they would be too tired after their shifts, so he would go get them now.  Buck offered to go with Eddie, but was refused, so instead, he took it upon himself to complete cleaning the kitchen and washing the dishes. They ate before realizing they forgot the ingredients, and it was dark outside by the time Eddie returned.

Eddie entered through the kitchen doorway, holding a reusable bag with the seven Granny Smith apples, ground nutmeg, and lemon required for the pie. Eddie set down the bag on the kitchen table and unloaded the groceries onto the table. Buck watched him silently, back turned to the sink and leaning against the counter. He put the apples and lemon in the fridge and then turned back to grab the ground nutmeg to place it in the cabinet. Eddie opened the cabinet to Buck’s left and obscured his face from view with the open cabinet door.

Buck pushed away from the counter and approached Eddie. He was rearranging the seasonings in the cabinet, giving Buck ample time to corner him. Buck wasn’t exactly subtle in his movements, leading him to believe that Eddie let him trap him against the counter. Buck placed his hands on either side of Eddie on the counter and pressed himself against Eddie’s back. Eddie closed the cabinet door and placed his hands on the counter between Buck’s, infuriatingly close, but still not touching Buck’s hands.

“You’ve been ignoring me.” Buck could feel the involuntary shiver that descended through Eddie’s body at Buck’s breath on his ear.

Eddie leaned back into Buck and asked, “Have I?”

“You know you have.”

Eddie replied, “Hmm, I don’t know. I’ve been talking to you and hanging out with you all day.”

“I don’t mean like that.” Buck removed his right hand from the counter and slipped it beneath Eddie’s shirt. He slid his hand across his waist to trap Eddie against him, and splayed his hand out across the planes of Eddie’s waist. “I mean like this.”

“I’m just treating you how I treat all my friends.”

“Come on, Eddie. Stop playing dumb.”

“I’m not,” Eddie said and turned his head to the side to look at Buck’s face. “That’s all we are, right? Just best friends?”

Buck was too well-versed in Eddie to not realize that Eddie was provoking him. He was purposefully pushing Buck’s buttons in an attempt to get what he wanted. Lucky for Eddie, Buck always had trouble not complying with Eddie's every wish.

“Is that enough to encompass what we are?” Buck asked quietly, searching Eddie’s eyes. “Because I’m not so sure anymore.”

Eddie twisted around in Buck’s grip, his hand trailing along Eddie’s skin as he turned, until it rested in the small of his back. Their faces were a lot closer now, and uninhibited by the positioning from before. Buck’s left hand was still resting on the counter, and he put weight on it, pressing Eddie back into the counter, effectively removing his chance of escaping Buck’s hold. The new position threw off Eddie’s balance, and he brought his hands up to rest on Buck’s chest to steady himself.

Buck broke his eye contact with Eddie to sweep his eyes down Eddie’s body, lingering on the hands on his chest and the way Eddie leaned against the counter. Buck spied a sliver of skin where he had rucked up the shirt earlier, and his eyes focused in on it before he pulled his eyes away to make eye contact with Eddie again. Buck supposed he had been watching him rake his eyes over Eddie’s body, and could probably see the want, the need , in his eyes. 

Eddie’s face had turned pink from the attention and proximity. Buck thought he had never seen someone so beautiful. Eddie wasn’t dolled up or wearing his best clothes, just a T-shirt and some old gym shorts he’d thrown on to clean the house and run errands, but he looked so perfect. He was Buck’s future and looked like domesticity and sleepy mornings lazing in bed. He looked like the great father he was to the most perfect son. He looked like the love of Buck’s life, and Buck was pretty tired of not having him completely.

Buck pressed closer to Eddie and could see all the same things reflected in Eddie’s eyes. The way those brown eyes softened when they looked at Buck was all the confirmation Buck needed to know Eddie was on the same page. They could hash out the details later and confess all they had kept bottled up for years, but that was for later.

Buck made a show of examining their situation once more and gave Eddie a small smirk. “Does this mean I win? Not anywhere else you can go.”

He didn’t receive a response. Instead, Eddie coyly smiled at him and brought his hands from Buck’s chest to cup his face. It happened so fast that Buck didn’t have time to react when Eddie pulled Buck down to meet Eddie in the middle. 

Buck’s eyes slipped closed involuntarily as Eddie’s lips touched Buck’s. His lips were soft against Buck’s, and the proximity enraptured Buck’s senses. He tightened his arm around Eddie’s waist, pulling him further into his chest until they were fully pressed together, not a centimeter of distance between their bodies. Buck’s left hand abandoned the counter, and it cradled the back of Eddie’s head. Buck ran his fingers through Eddie’s soft hair and grasped at the strands to tilt his head backwards, giving Buck more control over the kiss. 

The first touch of Eddie’s tongue at the seam of his lips sent Buck spiraling out of control and parting his lips to meet Eddie in the middle. Buck felt Eddie’s nose brush against his cheek as they melted into each other. 

Nothing had ever felt so right. Like everything they did together, it was perfect. Buck could taste the millions of kisses in their future on Eddie’s lips, and the unspoken promises lingered on the tips of their tongues. 

They broke apart, but stayed close enough to rest their foreheads together. Their chests heaving and hearts racing. Eddie leaned back in to peck Buck’s lips, leaving Buck chasing Eddie’s lips as he pulled away once more.

In the space between them, Eddie breathed, “No, I win.”

Once Buck registered Eddie’s words, his brain still scrambled from the kiss, he groaned. “Really? Did you kiss me just so you could say that?”

“No. I kissed you because I think I’ve been waiting seven years to do that. I was done waiting for you to make the first move.”

Buck spluttered, “Okay, hold on. You never even told me you liked guys! This isn’t fair!”

Eddie patted Buck’s chest and said, “Well, there’s more than one reason I said ‘they’ when speaking about my exploits in Texas. Also, I have found literally every excuse in the book to touch you, there’s no possible way you thought that was platonic.”

“Well, no. But my point still stands,” Buck objected.

Eddie gave him a placating smile, “Sure, it does, Buck.”

They were still wrapped up in each other's arms, unwilling to part further than they could touch. The tone shifted as they held one another, realizing they needed to verbalize what this was for both of them, even if they both knew this was for the rest of their lives.

Eddie said, “Come on, let’s go talk in the living room.” He grabbed Buck’s hand and led the way to the couch, where they sat down facing each other. They both had one leg bent on the couch and one resting on the floor, and their knees were touching on the couch. 

Neither Buck nor Eddie had let go of the other’s hand and had to slightly lean in towards the other to let their hands rest comfortably between them. Buck took both of Eddie’s hands in his and brought them up to his lips, kissing the backs of his hands. He tried to infuse his love and devotion for Eddie in the kisses, and made eye contact with Eddie through his eyelashes as his mouth rested on Eddie’s hands. 

Buck couldn’t help himself and used the hands in his grip to pull Eddie closer to him until he enveloped him in a hug. He tucked his head in the crook of Eddie’s neck and squeezed tighter than ever, and received the same treatment back from Eddie.

“I’m so glad it’s you,” Buck admitted. “It could only ever be you.” He pulled away from the hug to look Eddie in the eyes and said, “Even if you didn’t feel the same, I’d spend my whole life happy to just be your best friend.”

There were tears in Eddie’s eyes as he replied, “Me too, Buck. I could spend my whole life happy if I got to be in your life.” 

“Luckily, we get to have that and more,” Buck smiled. “Eddie…  I’m so in love with you. All I’ve ever wanted was a family that I could love and pour myself into… a family that could rely on me and that I could rely on. Eddie, you’ve given me that and more; there’s no chance I could ever love anyone more than I love you and Christopher.”

“You’re always gonna be family, Buck. You’re not going anywhere ever again without us,” Eddie responded. He brought a hand up to cup Buck’s jaw and said, “I love you so much. I’m in love with you, and I will be for the rest of my life.”

Buck pulled Eddie into another hug, before pulling back and kissing the daylights out of him. He ran his fingers through Eddie’s hair so much that when he pulled away, Eddie’s hair was in disarray and sticking up everywhere. Buck might’ve teased him any other day, but all he could say was: “You’re so beautiful.”

“Are you making fun of me right now?” 

“No. I’m gonna marry you and I’ll include it in my vows,” Buck promised. “I’ve never been so serious about anything in my life.”

Eddie balked. “In your vows? Buck, we haven’t even officially started dating yet!” 

Buck sat up and squished Eddie’s face between his hands. “Okay, Eddie Diaz, will you be my boyfriend and future husband?”

Eddie’s words came out distorted, but Buck could make out his words. “I don’t think that’s exactly right either, but yes, I’ll be your boyfriend and future husband.”

Buck leaned forward and pecked Eddie’s squished lips. “Everything’s right with us. Everything.” He paused a few inches away from Eddie’s lips and hesitantly inquired, “Uh, is Chris gonna be fine with this? With us?”

Eddie reached up and encircled Buck’s wrists with his hands and pulled them off his face so he could speak freely. “Yeah, he’s gonna be fine. He knows I love you. He’s been bullying me to make it official.”

Buck felt a flash of relief course through him. “Getting bullied by a teenager. How far you’ve fallen, Diaz.”

Eddie took on an offended face and retorted, “He was making fun of you literally yesterday because you tried to flip vegetables in the pan and they fell on the floor.”

“Shhh.” Buck put his pointer finger against Eddie’s lips to shush him. “We agreed to never speak about that again,” he grumbled.

Eddie nipped at his finger in an attempt to get Buck to withdraw his finger. “I didn’t agree to shit. That was something you decided I agreed to.”

“Okay, maybe. But do you want to agree to it anyway because you love me?” Buck batted his eyelashes at Eddie. 

In response to Buck’s pleading, Eddie brought his hand up and flicked Buck’s forehead. “I’ve loved you for a lot longer than today, but I never let up on my duty of making fun of you as your best friend. That’s never going to change.”

“Mmm, I wouldn’t want it to.”

Eddie surprised Buck by suddenly standing up and extending a hand to Buck. “Okay, do we wanna keep arguing about this, or… do we wanna go makeout in bed?”

Buck shot up, too, and took Eddie’s hand. “Definitely the second option.”

He laughed at Buck’s eagerness and led them down the hallway to their bedroom. 

There was nothing else Buck would rather listen to.

***

Buck had been excited for their first date night since they had started dating. He was determined to sweep Eddie off his feet and woo him beyond belief. So, naturally, everything possible went wrong.

Their shift ran long because of a four-alarm fire that they were called to an hour before their shift ended. There was a car wreck on their route home, and they had to add twenty extra minutes to their drive home. Buck got a stain on the shirt he wanted to wear for the date, meaning he had to rummage around in his clothes until he found a suitable backup, which was slightly wrinkly. Despite making it to the fancy Italian restaurant that Buck had made a reservation for on time, they informed him that they had accidentally given his reservation to a ‘Bulkley,’ and they had no more tables for another hour, at least. To top it all off, it started raining heavily on the short walk back to the truck, soaking Buck and Eddie to the bone. 

It was no surprise that Buck felt defeated once he made it back to the truck. Eddie had hopped into the passenger seat as quickly as possible, but Buck just gently banged his forehead on the truck window as the rain pelted his sopping clothing. Why couldn’t the Universe just let him take his boyfriend on a date?! He must’ve zoned out, because the next thing he knew, the window he was leaning his head against was rolling down against his forehead. Last time he checked, the truck hadn’t even been turned on. He had to lift his head so he wouldn’t fall without the support of the window. Buck looked up to see an exasperatedly fond Eddie.

“Get in, Buck. You’re going to make a mess of my truck.” 

Buck sighed but complied as he wrenched open the door and heaved himself into the driver’s seat. He returned to his dramatics and set his forehead against the steering wheel. “It’s cold, Eddie.”

“I know, come here.”

He looked up at Eddie to find a towel already speeding towards his face. The towel obscured his vision and draped off the crown of his head. It wasn’t but a few seconds more until Eddie was vigorously rubbing the towel over his hair to dry it off.

“You know this is going to do nothing for the seat, right?” Buck’s question was muffled by the towel still over his head.

Eddie laughed. “I know, Buck. You’re so grumpy. I didn’t realize you hated the rain like that.”

Buck grumbled, “I don’t hate the rain, but this date is not going the way I planned.”

“Well, that’s okay, because I actually planned for this.”

Buck simply raised an eyebrow at Eddie’s statement.

“Okay, so maybe I didn’t exactly plan this… but you know why it’s okay?”

“Why?”

Eddie reached across the car and squeezed Buck’s thigh in reassurance. “Because I still get to spend time with you. I don’t care what we’re doing. Whether we’re at the aquarium, the park, a fancy restaurant, a low-end diner, or even standing out in the rain, I’d be happy because I would be with you.”

Suddenly, Buck felt silly about worrying so much about getting the details of this date right. Eddie was right. Spending time together was the most important thing. It was ridiculous of Buck to be worried about Eddie realizing that he could do better if their first date wasn’t perfect. 

Buck leaned across the center console and cupped Eddie’s cold cheek to give him a sweet and short kiss. “You’re perfect for me, y’know that?” Buck smiled. “You’re right. You wanna go home, take a shower, and watch a trashy romance movie that we can make fun of the entire time?”

Eddie gave him a peck on the cheek. “There’s nothing I’d rather do.”

After this decision, the night completely turned around. The roads were oddly clear for nighttime in LA, and they hardly hit any red lights on the way home. The sky cleared up, and Buck and Eddie held hands on the way home.

They hopped in the shower together to avoid one of them awkwardly existing in their soaking wet clothes in the air-conditioned house. They washed each other’s hair and warmed up in the shower before drying off and throwing on their pajamas. 

Eddie pulled up a random romance movie, while Buck popped popcorn in the microwave. The buttery scent wafted through the house as Buck walked back into the living room, spying the selected victim of a movie.

“The Holiday Spin? Eddie, it’s nowhere close to Christmas.”

Eddie shrugged, “Eh. It seemed like a good choice, just read the description and you’ll know what I mean.” He shifted gears after defending his choice to Buck, “Popcorn me.” He opened his mouth, awaiting the buttery popcorn on his tongue.

“You’re ridiculous,” Buck teased. Despite his words, he scrutinized the popcorn bowl and chose the best-looking popcorn to place in Eddie’s mouth.

“Mmm, so buttery.”

Buck smiled at Eddie’s antics, set the popcorn on the coffee table, and sat down on the couch. He stretched his legs out and left enough room between his legs. When Eddie turned around, he furrowed his brow at Buck’s choice of seating. Beating Eddie to the punch, Buck patted the space in between his legs, inviting Eddie to sit down in front of him. Eddie made no protest and settled himself in between Buck’s legs and leaned up against his chest. He leaned forward for a moment to grab the popcorn off the table, but settled once more against Buck.

Buck grinned to himself at having Eddie up against him and slithered his hands underneath Eddie’s shirt and around his waist. He used his newfound purchase to hoist Eddie closer to him. His face was pressed against Eddie’s cheek, and he’d be able to make little comments about the movie directly into his ear. Buck felt a thrill go through him at Eddie’s proximity. Usually, during movie nights, they’d either be separated by Chris on either end of the couch, or they’d just have their knees, and sometimes their thighs, squashed against each other. 

Buck placed a kiss on Eddie’s cheek. “Popcorn me?”

The giggle that Eddie let out vibrated against Buck’s chest. He was rapidly becoming addicted to being able to feel the physical effect of Eddie’s emotions, rather than just the sound or expression. In his mesmerization, Buck forgot to open his mouth to actually receive the requested popcorn. The popcorn in Eddie’s hand touched Buck’s lips gently, waiting for him to open his mouth so he could feed Buck. 

Buck parted his lips just enough for the popcorn to slip by. It was pushed into his mouth by Eddie’s index finger that lingered too long after feeding him. Buck closed his lips around the tip of Eddie’s finger and licked the butter and salt off of it, before pulling off and chomping down on the popcorn.

Eddie groaned and threw his head back on Buck’s shoulder as Buck smirked at Eddie’s reaction. Buck found himself drawn to the expanse of Eddie’s unblemished throat. While Eddie was still leaning back on his shoulder, he lowered his head to the skin right below his jaw and placed tiny, chaste kisses there, before trailing more kisses down towards the base of his neck. The tension Buck wasn’t aware he had bled out of Eddie with each kiss pressed into his skin.

Before Buck could get carried away, Eddie wedged a hand between Buck’s mouth and his neck. He continued to pepper Eddie’s palm with the kisses originally intended for his neck. Eddie guided Buck away from his neck and placed a bruising kiss on Buck’s lips to stop the onslaught of kisses. “Movie first, this after, okay?”

Buck longingly stared at Eddie’s lips and stated, “I’ll certainly try my best, but no promises.”

Eddie merely sighed at Buck’s actions, but couldn’t hide the fond amusement in his eyes from Buck’s prying eyes. Eddie had to bend over to reach the remote on the table, and Buck had to let Eddie free from his arms. Buck let his hands rest on the sides of Eddie’s waist, so that he could trap Eddie against him once more when he leaned back. Eddie pressed play on the remote and settled into Buck’s arms. 

Buck employed Eddie in the job of feeding him popcorn every now and then, seeing as he was unwilling to let go of his grip on Eddie. They chatted about random things that they were reminded of by the movie, and guessed every single possible plot point in the movie. Buck was a little baffled that the movie was so predictable, but he supposed he shouldn’t have questioned Eddie’s choice of movie.

He did his best to behave himself, but he couldn’t help but steal a few kisses when Eddie was so gorgeous and funny. It really wasn’t fair that he had Eddie in his arms, but couldn’t kiss him all he wanted. Eddie indulged him and would let Buck give him kisses on his lips or cheek, and he even let Buck mouth at the path behind his ear for a few minutes before he accidentally jostled him by throwing popcorn at the TV.

Nearing the end of the movie, Buck commented, “Movie nights are much more fun when I get to wrap you up in my arms.”

Eddie turned his head to look at Buck and smiled. “They’re a lot more fun when I get to be in your arms.”

Buck smoothed a thumb over the bare skin beneath his fingers. “You were driving me crazy, you know that?”

“I hadn’t noticed.”

Buck briefly dug his fingers into Eddie’s side, which made him yelp from the tickling sensation. “You’re such a little shit sometimes. I was over here losing my mind because you’re slipping your hands up my shirt or into my pants, and pretending like it wasn’t a big deal, too!”

Eddie covered Buck’s arms around his waist with his own. “It was a big deal,” Eddie said factually. “When I woke up with my arm wrapped around your bare waist, I almost fell off the bed,” he laughed. “But I realized that I liked it too much not to work towards being able to wake up like that every morning. So I just ignored my racing heart and did it anyway.”

Buck gave him an unimpressed look. “You couldn’t have just, I don’t know, told me? ”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“Just watch the damn movie,” Buck exasperated.

When the movie came to an end, Buck remembered Eddie’s promise at the beginning of the movie. He removed his right arm from Eddie’s waist and used a finger to bring Eddie’s face to his. Buck poured his love and desire into the kiss, hardly giving them any space to breathe.

Buck mumbled against Eddie’s lips, “If we go to the bedroom now, I can guarantee you’ll wake up next to someone with no clothes at all. Better than just a waist, wouldn’t you say?”

Eddie groaned, “Very tempting. You’ve gotta let me go so I can get up first, though.”

That suggestion was less than favorable, so Buck used his right leg on the floor and his grip around Eddie’s waist to hoist them into a standing position. 

Buck tucked his face into Eddie’s neck and breathed in his comforting scent and proclaimed, “I’m never letting you go again.”

The words settled into Buck’s heart, as he was sure they did with Eddie’s, and they felt right. Now that they had finally figured it out, they would allow nothing to come between them. Buck would make sure that he could wake up with Eddie by his side for the rest of their lives.