Archive of Our Own

Now… Shane’s willing to admit he’s a little stupid. Sure, he hasn’t had as many concussions as some of his colleagues because he didn’t start fights (cough, cough, Ilya), but that doesn’t mean he has brains for much of anything other than hockey. 

And normally, he’s fine with that. But right now? Shane knows a few things. 

A Complete, But Not Exhaustive List of Things Shane Hollander Knows:

1) His teammates insist on getting involved in his personal life (cough, cough, Hayden)

2) It’s none of their fucking business (obviously)

3) They don’t care about #2 (unfortunately)

4) They’re insisting he go to this party (why, Shane has no idea, everyone knows he doesn’t like parties)

5) They seem to want him to meet a girl (apparently the X-Squad cast will be there and… great? Yay? Good for them?) (Who cares?)

6) Shane is gay (or super gay according to a certain someone)

7) Shane is in a relationship (it’s been a week and better than anything he’d dared to hope for)

8) Shane is in a relationship with Ilya Rozanov (that should stand on its own, he thinks. Who would want anyone else if they could have Ilya Rozanov? Isn’t he clearly the best option out of the entire world?) (Not that Shane’s biased)

9) He can never tell his team #6-8 (even in his imaginations, it never ends well) (he hates that, hates how it makes his chest feel like it’s caving in more than anything) 

10) Shane doesn’t trust his teammates to not throw him at any woman who comes his way (he hates how he doesn’t trust them either)

11) Shane has been peer pressured into going to the club (he couldn’t exactly say ‘no, I don’t want to go to your stupid fucking club because I want to stay home and facetime or text my boyfriend Ilya Rozanov all night. Please be understanding)

12) Shane needs backup

Honestly, it wasn’t a hard conclusion to come to. 

And that was how he found himself pulling out his contacts and calling Svetlana Vetrova. 

#

Step One: need backup in the form of your chosen bisexual. 

Luckily for him, he knows Svetlana is in Montreal. She’s here for a few days on a business deal and free in the nights. 

And she picks up on the first ring. 

“Shane?” her accented English comes through and he can’t help the sigh of relief. “Is everything alright?”

“All good,” he squeaks out. “Well. Kind of. I need a favor.”

She sighs. They haven’t talked a lot since she fixed his relationship with Ilya last week, but they’ve texted a little. He’s pretty sure she’ll do it. 

Mostly. 

Maybe. 

“What is it?”

“My teammates want me to go to a party and meet women.” SHe laughs. “Yeah, I know, but I couldn’t think of a way to get out of it. Would you pretty please meet me there as my plus one? Please? I’ll tell you every embarrassing story about Ilya I know.”

“You do not have to bribe me, Shane,” she assures him. “Text me the address. I will be there. I enjoy making hockey players feel stupid.”

“Thanks. You’re awesome.”

“Oh, I know.”

With that, she hangs up and pulls up his chat with Ilya. 

💖💐Lily 🌷💗

6:23 PM

Problem solved. She’ll come.

See? Told you!

Sveta is the best

Yeah, yeah

Don’t get smug

😏

🙄

I’ll text you when I get back

❤️

❤️

He’ll be okay.

And with that, he shuts off his phone and gets ready. 

#

Step Two: go to a party full of hot movie stars.

Shane, somehow, shows up after Sveta, who lingers outside, wearing a stunning dress that makes him feel severely underdressed. The moment she sees him, she grins and saunters over, linking their arms. 

“You look….” she trails off. 

Yeah, Shane can’t even defend himself. 

“I know,” he groans. “I look like a slob compared to you.”

“You look like an athlete,” she says kindly. “But yes.” She makes a face. “No one will believe I am here with you by choice.”

They enter the party, Shane’s face being more than enough access. 

“Who am I to you?” she mutters. “Girlfriend? Escort?”

“Just my friend,” he mutters back. “No need to lie.”

“I want a drink,” she declares and drags him to the bar. 

He has no choice but to comply. She takes him and slides into the bar. “Vodka,” she tells the bartender. “The best Russian brand you have. And do you have ginger ale?”

“Yes,” the bartender says, staring at Shane. 

“One for my friend,” she instructs. 

“I can have a bee-”

Sveta holds up a hand. “Do you want alcohol?”

“I can-”

“No, Shane. Do you want it? Is simple question.”

He glances to the ground. “No.”

“Then do not get it. Simple.”

The bartender returns with their drinks. Shane gets some cash out and Sveta shoves it at the bartender, daring him to refuse her.

He mumbles a thanks and slinks away to a different end of the bar. 

“You need new clothes,” Sveta decides, sipping her vodka. “I will return a weekend you are free and take you shopping. You will learn how to dress.” She shoots him a sly grin. “Then Lily will be very, very happy.” Shane blushes and Sveta nudges him. “Lily will not be able to resist you.”

“Shut up,” Shane hisses. “People will think you’re-”

“Hollander!” JJ yells. “My man!”

He holds out his hand. Shane awkwardly shakes it. JJ sighs and Sveta glares. 

Ah, Shane must have done that wrong. 

“Hey, JJ,” he says, breaking the silence. “Thanks for the invite.”

JJ grins. “Course! Always happy to get you out of the house.” JJ turns to Sveta, obvious to how Shane’s face is saying I would be happier at the house, calling my boyfriend. “And who is this lovely lady?”

Sveta holds out her hand and somehow, JJ knows to kiss it. “Svetlana,” she says. “Pleasure.”

“Hollander,” JJ whistles. “Where have you been hiding this pretty thing?”

Shane sighs. “Sveta’s my friend, JJ.” 

“And we met recently,” Sveta informs him. “I haven’t been hidden anywhere.”

“Damn, okay!” JJ laughs. Shane wonders how. Is he supposed to be laughing? This is weird. “How did you two meet?”

Sveta glances at Shane. She jerks her head slightly, her lips a thin line. The symbol is more clear than anything JJ’s been throwing his way. The truth or a lie? 

Shane nods. 

The truth. As much as we can tell.

She nods back. “Well, I am a friend of Lily.” 

JJ’s eyes widen. “Boston Lily?”

Sveta nods. “The very same. I met Shane here through her.”

“I have to meet this girl.”

“No,” Shane snaps. 

“What he means,” Sveta interjects, placing a hand on Shane’s shoulder, “is that Lily is very private and has better things to do than be ogled at by,” She deliberately gives JJ a once over, “mediocre looking hockey players.”

JJ gasps, his hand going to his chest. “Are you saying I am not pretty?”

“Lily only dates the best. As do I. So run along now.” She makes a shooing motion. 

JJ laughs again. “You are fantastic.” He grabs her arm. “Come on, we have to introduce you to the rest of the guys. I need to see you make them cry.”

Sveta secures herself more in Shane’s arm, pulling him along. She shoots JJ a slightly feral grin. “I love making grown men cry!”

“Hollander, thank you for inviting her. This is going to be so much fun!”

Svetlana laughs, but she glances at Shane and he can tell she read everything. She gives him a reassuring grin. 

He is only slightly assured. 

But it could be worse. Sveta takes control of the conversation, doing everything from insulting their looks and hockey skills to the cars they drive. She commands their attention and laughter and allows Shane to slip to where he’s comfortable: the background. 

But eventually, he just slips from them altogether and slides into a booth. 

“Are you here to help me finish these fries?” says a person he hadn’t noticed was already there. 

Fuck.

He’s accidentally slid into a booth with Rose fucking Landry. 

“I….”

“Shane,” Sveta scolds, rounding the corner. “You left without me.” And then her eyes land on Rose fucking Landry. She gasps, hand going to mouth. 

Step Three: have the bro code called on you (if you cannot recognize wingmaning is needed, someone else can do it for you).

Rose Landry (fuck what is Shane supposed to call her? Rose? (too informal, he doesn’t know her at all) Landry? (that would make her like his teammates. Is that even allowed when it comes to Rose Landry?)) (Fuck it, he’s going with Landry) gazes at Svetlana, her eyes running over the admittedly very tight dress she has on. Landry gulps and offers Sveta a small smile. 

“Are you here to help me finish these fries?” Landry asks. 

“If you don’t mind us joining you,” Sveta says, returning the smile. 

“Not at all.” Sveta slides into the booth, pushing Shane to the side to make room. “The chef gave me all these fries,” Landry continues, “and they’re soooo good, but I do have a costume to fit into tomorrow, so….”

“You would be beautiful either way,” Sveta assures her, still smiling. “But I would be happy to help. We girls must help each other out, yes?”

“Girl code,” Landry agrees. 

Wow, her cheeks are red. Did she use too much blush?

“I am Svetlana,” Sveta says, sticking out her hand. She jerks her head at Shane. “The silent one is my friend Shane.”

Sveta elbows Shane. “Oh, yeah, hi. I’m Shane.”

“Rose,” Landry (Rose?) says. She holds her hand to Sveta, who shakes it, and then to Shane. “It’s nice to meet you both.” She glances at Shane. “I am a fan of yours, actually.”

He raises his eyebrows. “Really? I love your movies.”

“Aww, thanks.”

“Yes, you are amazing actress,” Sveta adds. 

Rose’s eyes dart back to her. “You’ve seen my work?”

Svetlana nods. “All of it. You are marvelous.”

Somehow, Rose’s cheeks get redder. It must be the lighting. “I….” She gulps. “Thank you. Where did you get that dress? It’s stunning.”

Sveta glances at Shane. “You can zone out now. I know you want to text Lily.”

“Oh, thank god!” he exclaims then winces and Rose’s startled expression makes him wince harder. “Sorry, I know nothing about clothing.”

“I will take you shopping,” Sveta reminds him. “Lily will love it.”

Shane blushes, confident his face resembles a tomato more than a human at the moment. “Shut up.”

Sveta waves dismissively at him. “Text Lily.”

Shane does not need to be told another time, tuning out all noise as Sveta starts rambling about her dress. 

💖💐Lily 🌷💗

8:13 PM

I wish you were here.

Same

Are you home? 😏

Unfortunately no. Still at the party. 

So sad 😢 I cannot see hot boyfriend yet 

I must find vodka

OMG you drama queen.

I will call as soon as I get home, okay?

☺️

Any hot movie stars grab your eye?

It’s catch your eye.

And no, you jealous asshole.

You know I’m with you.

Besides, I’m at a booth with Rose Landry right now and we both know she’s not my type.

😉

WHAT?

SHANE?

THIS IS A DISASTER!!!!!

Did I flirt wrong?

Sorry, I know I usually don't but I wanted to try.

No not that

You flirted okay I am very hard right now 🥵

Disaster is different 

Okay…?

You are with Rose Landry Are you sure?

Yes. Very sure.

She introduced herself as Rose and everything.

FUCK!

Will you tell me what’s going on or do I have to guess?

Sveta has MASSIVE crush on Rose Landry I promised if I ever met her I would

Fuck what is word?

Help to make Rose Landry want to fuck her?

You mean wingman?

YES!

THAT IS IT!

Okay, what does this have to do with me?

Shane 

Hollander 

Sveta has met Rose Landry and I am not there

I made promise to wingman You must wingman for me

This sounds like a you issue, honestly.

SHANE!

YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND!

SVETA WILL KILL ME IF PROMISE IS NOT KEEPED

Kept

I DO NOT CARE! MY LIFE IS ON THE LINE!

🙄

YOU MOCK ME BUT I WILL BE DEAD!

SLAYN!

Oh, you know that one but not kept?

And it’s spelled slain.

😡

Hollander I am serious

You must wingman I will do anything 

ANYTHING

And here’s the thing. Shane’s known Ilya for a long time now. He has a pretty good idea as to how his boyfriend’s mind works. 

Ilya’s thinking Shane will ask for some freaky sex thing. And okay, yeah, that would be a nice guarantee, but Shane also knows he can get Ilya to agree to almost anything in bed without the guarantee. Ilya is one of the horniest people Shane’s ever met. It wouldn't be hard. 

So he’s not wasting this promise on a sex thing. No, this needs to be something he knows Ilya would never agree to, even with a gun pointed at his head. 

💖💐Lily 🌷💗

8:19 PM

Hollander

Please

I am desperate

Shane

Shane

Shane

Shane

Shane

Anything? 

Yes Anything

Okay. 

Tell the public I’m the better hockey player.

Shane watches the dots form and disappear and reform only to disappear again. He knows Ilya takes pride in claiming to be the better hockey player (even though he’s wrong), so it’s truly up for grabs if he agrees. 

Shane’s all but given up when a screen shot comes in. It’s of Ilya’s twitter bio, which now reads: Boston Raider’s sexiest captain and second best hockey player in the league (for now). Watch out @ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer, I’m coming for you 😉

Holy shit. 

Ilya… Ilya…

He actually did it. Well, kind of. Shane’s not letting him get away with just this. But still. Shane’s in Ilya’s twitter bio now. It’s not boyfriend, but it’s there and no one can take that away from them. 

Shane’s eyes linger on the second half. Coming. Ilya probably thinks he’s so clever. Shane wants to roll his eyes, but he can’t. It’s a private joke, just for them. It reads like a chirp, but Shane knows better. Shane knows the message left there for him. 

I’m yours. I want you. 

💖💐Lily 🌷💗

8:23 PM

There Happy?

Am changing on Insta and Facebook

Nice try. But you can just claim you were hacked. I want you to say it at a post game interview. No denial.

🙄

Fine I will do that but will you still wingman right?

I cannot do it right now I do not have game until tomorrow!

Calm down, drama queen.

I’ll do it now.

Talk later?

Yes! Will need details!

Bye now!

Step Four: Wingman…?

Shane sets aside his phone and tries to focus on the conversation. It’s cryptic, full of terms Shane definitely doesn’t recognize, but after a few minutes, he thinks he understands a little of what they’re discussing: the socioeconomic implications of the costume choices in Rose’s latest movie. 

Shane has never been more lost on how to contribute to a conversation. There’s something happening about how the price of a certain brand means a character is trying to appear more well off than the movie depicts her being. Shane mostly thinks this is just a result of the designer not thinking that deeply. 

Maybe he’s missing something. 

Definitely not something he can learn in a few minutes. 

Fuck, he promised he’d wingman. What is he going to do? How does one even wingman?

Rose glances at her phone, which has started to ring while Shane’s been spiraling. She glances at Sveta. “Sorry, it’s my brother. Do you mind if I take this?”

“Not at all,” Sveta says smoothly. 

Shane shakes his head, but pretty sure she is not talking to him in the slightest. 

“Thanks,” Rose says and slides out of the booth, making for a more private place. Before she gets out of earshot, he hears her say, “Oh my god, John, what is it?”

Svetlana glances at him. “You okay, Shane?” He nods. She looks unconvinced. “Do you want to leave?” He shakes his head. “Really? You look miserable.”

“Just a little panicked,” he confesses quietly. “Il- Lily said he- she’d wingman for you if you met… you know and I have no idea how to do that for you.”

Sveta smiles fondly at him. “Shane,” She puts a hand on his shoulder, “you do not have to fulfill Lily’s promise. I am not expecting you to for her.”

Shane grins mischievously. “Oh, I have to now. I promised.” He leans in and whispers, “In return, he’s going to tell the press I’m a better hockey player.”

Sveta gasps, her hand going to her mouth. “No! Actually? She promised that?”

Shane nods. “So you understand why I need to be the best wingman ever, right?”

“I am coming to your place tomorrow and we’re watching Boston’s postgame interviews.”

Shane shrugs. “Just come for the full game, honestly. Maybe you can teach me a little Russian?”

“I will be the best tutor ever,” she promises. 

Rose comes back, sliding in, a twinkle in her eye. “I have some interesting news, news even Shane might find interesting.”

“Oooh!” Sveta claps her hands and shoots a look at Shane. “Do tell.”

“So, my entire family are hockey fans,” she glances at Shane. “Sorry if that’s awkward. My brother is also freaking out that I met you tonight and wants you to know he loves you when you’re not playing Detroit.”

“I’m used to it,” Shane assures her. “Thanks to your brother?”

Rose laughs. “You’re precious. Your Lily is so lucky.” Shane blushes. “But I’ll tease you about that later. The point is, apparently, Ilya Rozanov changed all of social media profiles.”

“He is known to do that,” Shane remarks, hoping his smile is contained on the inside. 

“No, you don’t understand. He changed them to say you’re the best hockey player!”

“Maybe the concussions got to him,” Sveta ponders, despite knowing. Shane marvels at her poker face. It’s incredible. Her eyes light up. “We should call him!”

“We should?”

“You have his number?” Rose questions. 

Sveta grins. “He is childhood friend.” She whips out her phone. “Should I?”

Rose grins, matching her. “Do it! Do it! Do it!”

Sveta pulls up her contacts and hits call for what Shane recognizes as Ilyushka in cyrillic. He picks up on the second ring. “Hello, Ilyushka,” she says in a sing song tone. 

“Hello, Sveta. Why are we speaking English?”

“For my new English speaking friend, Rose Landry. Say hi, Rose!”

“Hi!” Rose says excitedly. She looks up and catches Shane’s eye. She mouths, oh my god. 

He nods and gives her a reassuring smile. He knows Ilya. Ilya won’t be an asshole. Much. 

“Ah,” Ilya says. Shane can sense the twinkle in Ilya’s eyes. “You are still babysitting Hollander at party then?”

“I’m right here, Rozanov,” Shane snaps, playing up the rivalry a bit. 

“Is past your bed time, yes? You must get all eight hours for peak performance or else will be boring to play you.”

“Fuck you,” Shane opts to reply. It’s better than make sure you get sleep too, asshole. Love you. They haven’t said ‘I love you’ yet. It’s probably too early. 

He practically hears the you wish being bitten back. And the later. 

“No thanks!” is what Ilya goes for instead. Not that creative, honestly. “I do not fuck second best hockey players.”

“Not what your bio says,” Shane says, grinning at the girls. 

They grin back.

“Yes, Ilyushka,” Svetlana jumps back in. “What is up with that? Did you lose bet? Did you need something? Favor?”

“Fuck you Sveta,” Ilya replies instantly. “See if I talk to you again.”

“Oh, come on,” Rose whines. “Everyone wants to know.”

“You included?”

“Obviously me included.”

“Then suffer, Rose Landry. And be nice to Sveta. She is very special person. I will hunt you down if you are rude.”

“Noted,” Rose says, slightly quieter than before. 

“Stop threatening my friends,” Sveta snaps. “And go fuck yourself.”

“Obviously. What else is lonely Boston boy supposed to do on a night alone?”

Shane ducks his face, hoping his blush isn’t showing too much. 

Sveta rolls her eyes. “Goodbye, Ilyushka.” She hangs up in the middle of his reply. “Well, that was useless.”

“Is…. Are you involved with Rozanov?” Rose asks, her words carefully chosen. 

Svetlana laughs. “No, god no. I… I used to, but there were no feelings and not anymore or ever again.” She looks Rose in the eye. “We are friends.”

Rose nods. “Okay.”

“Sveta knows everything about hockey,” Shane blurts out, bringing both of their attention to him. Fuck, that was not smooth at all, but no choice  “I mean it! She knows as much as my mom and my mom knows hockey better than I do. Seriously, ask her how she knew the Raiders were going to win the cup in 2015.”

“You knew?” Rose asks, interested. 

Sveta shrugs. “Was not hard. Obvious.” 

She launches into an explanation and for the rest of the night, the conversation remains on hockey. Shane is thanking god for it. He knows hockey. He knows how to use it to play up how smart Sveta is. 

That’s good right? He’s being a good wingman?

He hopes so. Sveta and Rose exchange numbers at the end of the night. 

Rose also gives him her number, so maybe that’s not a good measure. 

Sveta grins at him at the end of the night before leaving for her hotel. And when he gets home, he calls Ilya and Ilya’s thanking him for helping Svetlana while simultaneously bemoaning that he actually told her he’d been asked to do that. 

The phone sex is good though. Ilya’s seems happy. 

Maybe that’s the right measure. 

#

Step Five: hang out with a gorgeous woman.

“Mr. Rozanov!” a reporter on the TV calls. “Mr. Rozanov!”

Svetlana and Shane share glances and set aside the flashcards they’d made. This is it. The moment they (and the rest of the internet) has been waiting for all game. 

“Yes?” Ilya asks, already annoyed. 

“Yesterday, your social media profiles were updated to cite Shane Hollander as the best player in the league. Do you have any comment? Were you hacked?”

“Not hacked,” Ilya says. “I did that.”

The reporter flounders, utterly bewildered. “What? Why?”

“Is truth, yes? Statistics say so.”

“But…. You’ve always claimed to be better than Hollander. Are you saying you’re not?”

Ilya shrugs. “Hollander is best player. Right now. I will score more goals and take my title.” He looks into the camera. “Watch out Hollander. Am coming for you.”

Shane laughs. “He can’t help making that joke.”

Sveta shoots him a look. “It is Ilyushka. He has humor of teenage boy.”

“I know,” Shane smiles fondly as the camera catches his boyfriend walk away from the crowd of reporter wanting to know more. 

His phone buzzes. 

💖💐Lily 🌷💗

10:23 PM

I hope you are happy

Do I get reward?

No.

😡

I humiliate myself and no reward?

You are bad girlfriend Jane

Suffer.

🥵

Hot

You are so weird.

You are dating me WILLINGLY

I don’t know what I was thinking. Sveta intimidated me into it.

Or you have good taste 😏

“Ilyushka?” Sveta asks, leaning over to read the texts. 

“Yeah,” Shane says, sending an eyeroll emoji, followed by a heart because he can’t help himself. 

He’s rewarded a second later with a heart in return. 

“You are so in love,” Sveta teases. “Is embarrassing.”

Shane sighs. “I know.”

“Ilyushka is worse. It’s Shane this and Shane that and I cannot talk to him for more than a minute before he mentions you.”

Shane laughs. “Yeah, sure.”

“I am serious! I will make recording next time. Then you will believe me.”

“I’ll save it on a special flash drive,” Shane decides. 

He and Ilya each have one now. He deletes all photos Ilya sends him of himself, but not before uploading them to that flash drive. Ilya has one too. 

“You do that.” 

She grins at him. Shane grins back. He likes hanging out with Svetlana. She’s a bit of a bitch, but in a good way. Shane enjoys talking hockey with her. She knows even more than him and is constantly insulting other players. And the best part is that he can bitch back without worrying she’s going to be disappointed in him. 

He’s always worried about that when he talks hockey with his mother. Sveta doesn’t need him to play Canada’s Golden Boy or be the perfect role model. 

It’s a little like talking with Ilya, just no horniness. 

He has a friend he doesn’t need any walls around. 

It’s really nice. 

Sometimes, he wonders how Hayden would react if he told him about Ilya. He doesn’t think Hayden would have a problem with him being gay, but he hates Ilya. He wouldn’t be able to separate the asshole competitor Rozanov on the ice to the Ilya who calls him sweetheart and texts him dog photos and makes him happier than he’s ever been. 

Shane hates that he is more comfortable with Svetlana, the woman who’s slept with his boyfriend, than with his best friend of about six years. 

“What is it?” Sveta asks, noticing his face. 

“You should take me shopping,” Shane blurts out. An idea strikes like lightning on Franklin’s key. “With Rose.”

Rose. 

If they go out with Rose, he can wingman for Sveta again and maybe get another friend. He likes Rose. He thinks maybe she’d be like Sveta, someone he could be completely at ease with. 

He’d like to get to know her better.

“Rose?” Sveta asks. “As in Rose Landry?” She nods. “Make sense. She has wonderful style.”

“And you could get to know her easier,” Shane suggests. “I know you waaant to.” 

“Shut up,” she snaps with no bite. 

“It’ll be nice to see her again,” he reminds her. “Regardless of your crush.”

She groans. “You will regret this Hollander,” she swears. “You will suffer. I will make you shop for hours.”

“You mean we’re going to spend hours with Rose.”

“Shut up,” she repeats.

He only grins. 

#

Step Six: hang out with TWO gorgeous women.

Shane really likes Rose. As a friend. Ilya’s getting more and more jealous by the day. The tabloids keep reporting on them. 

Movie Star Rose Landry Dating Hockey Player? Who is the Mysterious Woman With Them?

Rose Landry in Throuple? Click Here to Learn More!

Is Hockey Star Cheating On Rose Landry?

Two Timing Hockey Player? Rose Landry Victim? 

It keeps going on like that. Rose and Shane have both released statements about how they’re just friends, but the tabloids keep putting it out. Twitter isn’t much better. Shane’s decided to stay off twitter. Ilya isn’t. Ilya’s giving him a play by play. It’s somehow extremely annoying and also adorable. 

Ilya also has twenty-four different accounts dedicated to harassing hollandry shippers, but that’s between him and whatever hacker finally gets enough of shanehollandersfreckles1221, shanehollandersfreckles1410, lilylovesshane24, bostonlily1410, blily1221, 1221bostonlils, lilytheno1shanefan, shaneholladersgf1221, shaneandlily4eva, lily1410b, hollonav1410, theoghollanov, 1221hollanov, lily4hollanov, lilyandjane1410, janeandlily1221, lovemejane2481, ilovejane1410, 1221missmyjane, janeisthebest24, thejanefanaccount8124, imayknock1410, shisrightnextdoor1221, and signmyfaceilyarozanov1221. 

According to the account information, lilytheno1shanefan is actually from 2009, the day after the draft. Shane is choosing to ignore the insane stalkery implications of that in favor of just finding it cute. 

He really does hope none of the accounts get hacked. From what Ilya’s told him about Russia…. He would never be able to go home again. Especially with the number of thirst tweets from lilytheno1shanefan. 

Overall, Shane’s glad to not be cyberstalking the hollandry people like Ilya is. Still, Ilya blows up his phone anyway. 

💖💐Lily 🌷💗

1:32 PM

They say your babies will be adorable

🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

YOU WILL ONLY HAVE BABIES WITH ME

OUR CHILDREN WILL RULE MLH 🏒🥇🏆

We can’t have biological children?

So you hate me hollander 🥺😢

My boyfriend hates me 😫

Unbelievable 😭

We need divorce

We aren’t married either?

WHOSE FAULT IS THAT?

Since when do you know how to use ‘whose’?

I contain multitudes

You looked up that response didn’t you?

🖕

No wait

I will make better

🙄

😏🖕🍑🖕🖕🍑🖕🖕🖕🍑🥵💦🎉🎉🎉

Fuck off.

No no

Fuck me please

Remember? 😉

Shane knows Ilya’s joking. 

Mostly. 

💖💐Lily 🌷💗

6:13 AM

How to make bomb

Oops

Not google

Ignore that

Ilya?

Ilya?

ILYA?!?

WHY ARE YOU GOOGLING THAT THIS EARLY IN THE MORNING?!?!?

😇

ANSWER YOUR PHONE RIGHT NOW!

Yeah. Mostly. 

Shane’s really glad to be off the internet. 

But the good news is that he’s getting to know Rose a lot better and she’s really easy to talk to. It’s been nice getting a new friend. 

Sure, everyone thinks they should be dating, but that’s nothing new, right? His mom suggests he should “take her out to a nice dinner” before his dad shuts that down. Shane doesn’t see it, but one day his mom is making as subtle comments as she knows how about how he should be dating Rose Landry while both he and his dad look uncomfortable, and then the next, she says nothing. It’s clearly his father’s influence, although Shane’s a little unsure why. 

He probably could tell how uncomfortable it was making him. 

Then there’s the locker room. His teammates tease him to no end no matter how many times he says that she’s just a friend. No one takes him at his word. Not even Hayden, who, admittedly, knocked it off after the first three times. 

Whatever. He has Sveta and Rose. They’re both great. Rose is a best friend and Sveta… well, Shane’s starting to see her as a sister. 

Is that weird? He hopes not. Does she see him as a brother? He really can’t tell. She teases him yet looks out for him the way he thinks a sibling might, but that does seem to be her default setting with most people. 

Shane groans. This is the third time the girls have taken him clothes shopping. They insist that just this last time to get his new wardrobe perfect, but that was what they’d said the first time. 

The only thing different now is that Miles is here. Rose has insisted on bringing him along. Something about how having two men will calm down the cheating rumors in the tabloids. 

Shane is really just along for the ride. 

“Turn,” Sveta commands. 

Shane does so. He knows better than to argue at this point. 

“What do you think?” Sveta asks, turning to Rose. 

She considers, hand on her chin as if she’s about to start stroking some imaginary beard. “Hmm. Could be hot, but it just doesn’t fit right. Would need a tailor.”

“Yes, I agree. But this fabric?”

Rose shakes her head, Miles doing the same. “Disaster.”

“Yes. So we agree?”

Rose nods and beams evilly at him. “Next!”

Shane sighs and goes back to the dressing room. The things he does for his friends.

Why oh why couldn’t they have gone to the movies today? Sveta could have done that thing she did last time where she sat next to Rose and intertwined their fingers while reaching for popcorn. 

Then, they could have spent the entire movie holding hands and left Shane alone.

Yes, Shane thinks as he closes the dressing room door, I’ll make sure we do that again next time.

#

Step Seven: talk about you and your experiences. 

When Rose calls, Shane’s just reading, so its the perfect time. He sets his book aside and answers. 

“Hey, what’s-”

“IthinkImightbebisexual,” Rose blurts out.

“Okay? Can you repeat that a little more slowly? I don’t think I caught that.”

“I….” He hears her take a deep breath over the phone. “I think I might be bisexual.”

“Alright. Congrats?” Shane winces. What is he even saying? “That’s great.”

“Shane,” Rose snaps, “I’m freaking the fuck out.”

“Oh, sorry,” he stammers. What the fuck is he supposed to say here? “How can I help?”

She sighs. “I don’t know. I just… I need someone to talk to and it’s probably better to ask Miles since he’s you know, gay, but I feel like you-”

“Wait? Miles is gay?”

“Is there a problem with that?” Rose asks coldly. 

“No, no problem,” Shane assures her. He doesn’t blame her. He knows she knows about locker room culture. “None at all. I just…. You said it like I was supposed to know already and he’s never told me that.”

“Shane,” Rose says, exacerbated. “He’s been flirting with you for like… a week.”

“He has?” Shane exclaims. “How was I supposed to know?”

“Really? All the comments about your arms, abs, and thighs didn’t tip you off?”

“I thought he was interested in my workout routine!”

“I know,” Rose says sagely. “Miles kept complaining about that.”

“Fuck you.”

“No thanks. I think I want to fuck a girl. Can we talk about that a bit?”

“Sure. I don’t think I’m the expert on fucking girls, but I’ll try to help.” And then Shane’s brain catches up with what he’s said. “Fuck.” And now he’s muttering to himself, “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck-”

“Shane,” Rose interrupts, firm but gentle. “Breathe. Alright. You’re okay here. I won’t tell anyone you’re…?”

“Gay,” he confirms, barely loud enough to be heard. 

“I won’t tell,” Rose reaffirms. “I promise. You’re safe with me. Did you know most of my ex-boyfriends have left me for other guys?”

Shane chuckles a bit. “Sorry, I shouldn’t laugh at that.”

“No, please do. It’s a little funny. Especially since I was going to flirt with you before Sveta started talking about your Lily. Wait, is Lily…?”

“My boyfriend. We’re not out. He’s not especially. It would be… it would be really bad, Rose, for him. I… I probably should stop talking about this. I… Fuck. He’s going to be pissed.”

“That’s…. I…. Sounds a little unhealthy. It was an honest mistake.”

“I know.” Shane sighs and sinks into his bed. “I might be projecting. He’ll be fine. Probably. I… I’ve been so happy with him and so worried about this secret… but whatever. Not important. So, why are you asking me and not Miles?”

“I just… I’ve known Miles for longer and you’re a lot less judgy, you know? Granted I wasn’t sure you actually have had sex, but you’re easy to talk to. You know what I mean?”

“I know. And for the record, I have had sex. Why does everyone think I’m a virgin?”

“I don’t know. Probably something to do with your golden boy persona.”

“Fuck my life.”

“Pretty sure that’s your boyfriend’s job.”

He can almost see the smirk on her face. “Can we get back to your problem, now?”

“Sure, Shane. So… I… fuck. How did you know you like men?”

Shane goes red as a certain shower comes to mind. “Well…. I’m a guy so it’s a little different for me, I think. But um….” The gym! That is safe to talk about. “Noticed how I noticed him, really. My eyes kept lingering and I kept thinking about kissing and touching him. And also, well, you know….”

“You got hard,” Rose says bluntly. “I don’t have that.”

“No, you don’t, but what about… I’m assuming there’s a specific girl you’re thinking of. What do you think when you think of- This is ridiculous, I’m not qualified. Why don’t you ask Svetlana?”

“I can’t.”

“Why not? She’ll know more about women feeling attraction than I will.”

“Because the woman is her.”

“Oh.” Fuck. “That’ll do it.” Okay, okay. He could do this. “Okay, then, what do you feel near her?”

“I want to kiss her. I think about it so much that I can’t think about anything else. I can’t stop staring at her.”

“And you’re attracted to men?”

“Yes.”

“And it’s similar to this?”

“Yes.”

“Rose. I think you might be bisexual.”

“I… I’ve never liked a girl before. At least, I don’t think so. I can’t be bisexual.”

“Sure you can. Look,” he says seriously, “I don’t know about being bisexual, but my boyfriend is… and fuck, I wasn’t supposed to say that either.”

“It’s okay, Shane. It’ll be okay.”

“I know. Look, my point was I’ve done some research on bisexuals. You don’t have to be half and half. Just one is okay. Having a preference is okay. It doesn’t make you any less bisexual.”

Rose sighs. “I know. I should know that. I’ve been around theater kids all my life.”

Shane chuckles. “Hey, this can be scary. I’ve been hooking up with my boyfriend since we were nineteen and I only accepted that I’m gay a month ago. Fuck. I really should just stop talking.”

“No, please don’t. This is hilarious. Nineteen? Seriously?”

Despite himself, Shane smiles. “Yeah. He’s been it for me for a long time. It’s just been hard. You know how hockey is.” She hums on the other end of the line. “I have to be a role model, perfect Golden Boy Shane Hollander. I’m Asian. I don’t get the chances white people do. One slip up and I’m done. 

“Sometimes I think that’s why… why it’s taken me so long to accept Lily’s in my life and never leaving. I’ve wanted other men, but it’s never been the same as with him. But if the world found out, god Rose, it would make the crucifixion look like a slap on the wrist. And he’d never be able to go home again.”

“Homophobic family?” she asks kindly. 

Shane laughs to himself. Homophobic family, homophobic country. “Very. He’d never be able to visit his mother’s grave again. I… I’m always scared these days. I’m happy with him, but I dread what could happen to him if anyone found out.”

“Is there anyone who knows? Completely?”

Sveta. “A mutual friend. Well, Lily’s friend first. Now my friend too.”

“Svetlana?”

“Svetlana.” He sighs. “Why do we keep talking about me? Can we talk about you now? What are you going to do about your crush on Sveta?”

Rose groans. “I don’t know. She probably doesn’t like me.”

If Rose didn’t know Sveta is bi, Shane certainly couldn’t say anything. But he also knows Sveta has been trying to flirt (only because Ilya told him Sveta likes Rose, but he’s noticed). Rose’s crush isn’t hopeless. 

“Well….” Fuck. What can he say about how Ilya flirted with him? Nothing about that CCM shower. The gym. That’s safe. And Sveta’s been doing something similar. “Look, it took a lot for me to realize Lily liked me. A lot. But, looking back on it, one thing he did was find excuses to touch me for extended periods of time. There was this one time when we were working out in a gym, he offered me his water bottle.”

“Call the horny police.”

“Honestly? Yeah, you should. He made sure to brush his fingers over mine when he passed it over and took it back. He winked at me. Has Sveta done anything like that?”

“She keeps holding my hand,” Rose murmurs. “Do you think…?”

“Maybe. Look for it. You may be surprised with what you see.”

“Okay. I will. Thanks, Shane. You’re a good friend.”

“Anytime. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to call my boyfriend and panic.”

“It’s going to be fine,” she assures him. 

“I know. I also don’t know, so… see you soon?”

“I really don’t think I should get off the line.”

“Don’t worry. Lily will know what to do.”

“For the record, I hate this.”

“Bye, Rose!”

He just catches her “Bye Shane!” before he hangs up. The adrenaline is rushing, so he calls 💖💐Lily 🌷💗 before he can talk himself out of it. 

Step Eight: make everything about you and your relationship (part one).

“Shane?” Ilya’s voice comes instantly. “What-”

“I fucked up,” Shane breathes. Now, the panic starts sinking. He trusts Rose, right? He should. She’s been nothing other than a good friend to him. Yet why can’t he just get his mind to calm down. “Ilya, I….”

“Breathe, sweetheart,” Ilya orders. “Breathe with me. In….” Shane takes a deep breath. “And out. Good. Again, in…. and out. In… and out. You are doing so well. In… and out. In… and out.” Ilya hesitates. “Better?”

“Better,” Shane breathes back. 

“What happened?”

“I told Rose I’m gay. And that Lily is my boyfriend.”

For a moment, Ilya’s silent. “She is good friend, yes?”

“Yeah.”

“And you trust her?”

“Yes.”

“Then what is issue?”

“I didn’t tell you. And… I mentioned a few things about our relationship. She might piece it together and then what?”

“Breathe, Shane. What did you say?”

“We hooked up when we were nineteen, you’re bi, you flirted with me in a gym, Sveta knows about us, Sveta was your friend first, you wouldn’t be able to go home again or visit your mom’s grave if people found out, your family is homophobic.”

“Is that it?”

“Yeah, that’s it.”

“Shane, that is nothing. You are fine, sweetheart. I could be anyone. I could be from American south.”

“Eww.”

“I know, sweetheart. That is point. You said almost nothing. Now, if you said I was sexy Russian with a better backhand-”

“Fuck you.”

“-then we might be in trouble. But you did not. She will not know. Not… not unless you want her to.”

Shane frowned. “What does that mean?”

“I talk about you to Sveta. You talk to Sveta, but maybe you want your own friend? You trust Rose, yes? Maybe we could tell her truth. It would be nice, to have more people to talk to. For you.”

“I…. You want me to tell?”

“Yes, Shane, if it would make you happy. She is friend. She is celebrity. She knows secrets and p- keeping things to yourself?”

“Privacy.”

“Yes, privacy. She understands that. Maybe, it could be okay to tell her.” Shane falls silent, thinking, and Ilya begins stammering, “Is… is just idea. We do not have to.”

“No, let’s do it,” Shane mutters. “Not right now, but… what if… what if…. Rose and Sveta will both still be in Montreal for New Years. What if I host a New Years party with the four of us? We could kiss at midnight-”

“And so could Sveta and Rose,” Ilya finishes. “Assuming Rose wants to kiss Sveta.”

“Hey,” Shane objects. “It’s a good plan! It could be fun.”

“Yes, could be. If you buy alcohol and real snacks.”

Shane rolls his eyes. “Come on. I know how to host. There will be food for the three of you and then food for me. Easy.”

“You could eat with us, Hollander.”

“I have my diet; you know that.”

“I know… but one cheat day will not kill you. Just… think about it?”

“I’ll think about it,” Shane promised. “Thanks, for talking me down.”

“You are boyfriend. Is what I am here for.” Shane can hear the wink from Boston. “And other things.”

Shane rolls his eyes, confident Ilya can hear it too. “So, how was your day?”

#

Step Nine: plan a party (ft. alcohol).

“You are panicking over chips,” Sveta informs him. 

Yes, Svetlana, thank you so much, I hadn’t fucking noticed. 

“No shit,” is what ends up coming out of his mouth. 

“Shane,” she says, placing a hand on his shoulder, “just get tortilla, jar of salsa, avocado, and some shredded cheese. Does not need to be fancy. There will only be four of us.”

“But-”

“No buts.” She grabs two bags of tortilla chips without checking the nutritional value and shoves them into their shopping cart. “Keep it simple. Is party. Not Met Gala.”

“What’s a Met Gala?”

Sveta mutters something in Russian and the only bits and pieces he makes out are the swears (Ilya’s fault. When he found out Sveta was teaching Shane Russian, he insisted on teaching him the swears for when “Sveta is being bad teacher.” Which he literally has only needed so far when Ilya is being annoying.) “Is fancy party,” she explains. “Lots of famous people and pretty clothes. You would hate.”

“Probably.” It sounds terrible. He glances at the cart. “Do we really need two bags?”

“You remember Lily is coming, right? Why are you questioning how much she will eat?”

“Not good for… her.”

“And yet.”

“And yet,” Shane agrees with a sigh. “Where are the tomatoes?”

“Tomatoes?”

“You said jar salsa and no, ew, I can make that from scratch.”

“This is starting to sound complicated again.”

“It’s literally just salsa?”

“Okay. We will make salsa homemade, but buy the rest, okay? No need to be fancy.”

“No need,” Shane echoes. “It’s going to be okay, right? Rose… she… she won’t hate me because of Lily, right?”

Sveta frowns. “She’s been good about,” Sveta lowers her voice, “Lily being a man, right?”

“Right.”

“Then what could be problem?”

“I just… I can’t help thinking about what my team would say. Lily… they hate Lily. Even if they would be okay with… what I am-”

“Who you are,” Sveta corrects. “You are not a ‘what.’”

“I don’t think they agree. Most of them,” he corrects. “Sometimes, I… it’s hard to explain. I think they see me as more of a hockey robot than a person.”

“What? I do not understand.”

“Look, Sveta, I’m really good at hockey.” She scoffs. “It’s not bragging. I am. And I’m also really good at stats and knowing players and their weaknesses. I’ve spent my life becoming a walking encyclopedia of hockey knowledge and I don’t regret that, but I think my team forgets that’s not all I am. I think they forget that I’m human too. All they see is the Golden Boy. I don’t think they want to. I think… I hear some… comments, sometimes, about me being Asian. I think what they do is deliberate. Maybe. I don’t think they want an Asian player to be better than them. And putting me on a pedestal, turning me into a ‘what’ helps.”

“That’s fucked up, Shane,” Sveta tells him. “That’s really fucked up.”

He shrugs. “I’ve gotten used to it. But whenever I think about telling them about Lily, I can’t help but think about that strike thing in baseball. Strike one,” He holds up a finger, “I’m Asiain. Strike two,” He holds up another finger and lowers his voice, “I’m gay. Strike three….”

Sveta holds up three fingers. “You’re dating Lily. Who they hate.”

“Every last one of them,” Shane confirms. “I don’t know how bad it would get, but I can’t imagine it ending well. I don’t trust them with this.”

“You need new team,” Sveta decides. 

Shane laughs as they come to the produce aisle. “Seriously?” He grabs the vegetables he remembers from that salsa recipe he likes. “Where would I go? In case you haven’t noticed, the entire league is homophobic.”

“Boston is not that bad,” Sveta muses. 

“Not that bad is still bad,” Shane reminds her. “What’s the locker room culture like?”

“Violent,” she admits. “Crude. Macho man.”

“So odds they’re good?”

She sighs. “Not great. They are supportive of each other’s sexual exploits.”

He rolls his eyes. “And would that extend to mine?”

“I don’t know.” She thinks about it, grabbing fresh cilantro. “I have heard them use slurs casually. I don’t think they realize they do it. Fuck.”

“The whole league is like this, Sveta,” he repeats. “You know this. No matter where I go, it won’t be good.”

“There has to be.”

“There isn’t.”

“I’ll find it,” she resolves. 

He sighs. “You do that.” He looks around. “Where’s the shredded cheese?”

#

Step Ten: make everything about you and your relationship (part two) (ft hosting a fucking good party).

January 1st fell on a Sunday, so obviously, Ilya flew into Montreal Friday night. Luckily, he didn’t have practice or a game this weekend, so he didn’t need to leave until Sunday night. Shane couldn’t be happier. He gets his boyfriend for basically two days. 

Well, a day and a half. Half of Saturday is being spent cooking, prepping, and celebrating. 

He’s very stressed. Ilya’s doing his best to calm him down with hugs and forehead kisses and being the sous chef, but he can only do so much. 

“It will be okay, sweetheart,” Ilya mutters, tilting his head up from where it’s been resting on Shane’s shoulder to kiss his jaw. “Everything is out and perfect.”

It’s true. Chips, drinks (alcohol and otherwise), a spread of vegetables, dip, salsa, and plenty of crappy sugar cookies from the grocery store that Sveta insists are a necessity. He doesn’t understand, but apparently he doesn’t get a vote since he’s never been to a high school or office party. 

“Just worried,” Shane murmurs. Ilya’s arms, which are currently wrapped around his middle, squeeze him. “I know it’s irrational. Sorry.”

Ilya kisses his jaw again. “Brain is scary place. I know this. I am here, okay? Sveta will be too. You are not alone.”

Shane turns his own head and kisses his boyfriend properly. It’s nice to be able to do this. To kiss lazily and not worry about limited time. Well, not worry as much about limited time. Or if this will be the last time they’re together. 

They’re actually dating. There will be no more post Sochis or post tuna melts. There will be a next time.

Provided no planes crash. 

Wow, I really need to try to be positive. 

Ilya pulls away and spins Shane in his arms so they’re face to face. Then Ilya rests his forehead on Shane’s. 

“Your pretty brain is being bad, yes?”

“How do you know my brain is pretty?” Shane grumbles, winding his own arms around Ilya. “You can’t see it.”

“It is part of you,” Ilya says like it’s obvious. “All parts of you are pretty. So your brain must be too. Logic, sweetheart.”

“Seems shaky, but I’ll allow it.”

“Oh, will you?” Ilya grins and leans in again for a slow, sweet kiss. “What would happen if you did not?”

“I-”

The doorbell rings. Both of their heads snap to the door. 

“Sveta?” Ilya mutters, low enough to not be heard. 

“Probably not,” Shane admits. “I kind of asked Rose here earlier, to get it out of the way without too much of an audience.”

“She was excited, yes?” 

Shane nods. Her exact texts had been: 

HELL YES I WANT TO MEET LILY ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY????? 

I WILL BE HTERE! 

*THERE!!!!

SO FUCKING PUMPED!!! 

“Breathe, Shane. Will be fine.”

“I might believe that once we’re on the other side of it,” he murmurs back. He takes Ilya’s hand and squeezes it. “Wish us luck.”

Ilya grins and releases Shane. He walks over to the door and opens it. Rose is there, grinning. She throws her arms around him instantly, trying to engulf him in a hug. It doesn’t work since he’s so much bigger than her, but she’s trying. 

It’s appreciated. 

“Good to see you,” Shane says, wrapping his arms around her for a quick hug before pulling away. “Glad you could make it.”

She grins wider. “Same. Now move. I’ve been dying to meet Lily.”

Shane steps aside, letting her enter the apartment. She quickly takes off her shoes and hangs up her coat before almost running to the living room. 

Shane follows and watches as she stops dead in her tracks at the sight of Ilya Rozanov casually lounging on the sofa as if he doesn’t have a care in the world (and as if Shane doesn’t know he literally started sitting like this to seem calm and nonchalant). Ilya sits up properly and waves at her. 

“Hello, Rose Landry,” he says as if he also isn’t a bundle of nerves. “Welcome.”

Rose marches right up and sticks out her hand. “Hello. It’s so good to finally meet you.” Ilya shakes her hand, slightly stunned, and Rose turns to Shane. “I see what you mean when you say this would be worse than the crucifixion.”

Ilya’s eyebrows narrow suspiciously and he stands. “What did you say, Hollander?” He folds his arms, putting on a show of pouting. 

Rose hits him gently. “Oh, calm down. Shane was just saying that if your relationship got out, it would… and I believe the exact words were make the crucifixion look like a slap on the wrist.”

“Am I wrong?” Shane mutters. 

Rose shakes her head. “Not at all. You’re basically like Hockey Jesus and he,” She jerks her head in Ilya’s direction, “is the Hockey Devil. If it came out that you were dating…” She whistles. “Social media would, well, crucify you.”

“Which is why it needs to stay secret, Rose,” Shane reminds her. 

She only smiles and mimes zipping her lips and throwing away the key. “I won’t say, promise. Congrats, Shane, on managing to date hockey itself and on bagging an absolute hottie.” She winks, then turns to Ilya. “And you, Mr. Rozanov. I can’t wait to get to know you better. All Shane’s told me is that you make him very happy, and while that’s cute as hell, it’s not exactly informative.”

“Aw, Shane,” Ilya coos, beaming. “You have crush on me? How embarrassing.”

Shane rolls his own eyes. “I regret everything already.”

He’s lying of course. Ilya and Rose get along like chocolate and raspberries, according to Rose. Shane thinks the phrase like a house on fire is more accurate to the situation, but what does he know? It’s just his new best friend and his boyfriend. 

Sveta arrives not long after Rose. The evening devolves into a mess of board games, card games, and laughter. 

Rose dominates Uno, but Ilya waxes poetic about betrayal coming from those closest to you when Shane gives him a +4 (Shane, on the other hand, just tells him to suck it). Ilya retaliates when they play Bullshit. He is never wrong when someone is bluffing. It’s slightly concerning. Sveta wins all their rounds of Old Maid and Ilya teases her relentlessly for the name. And when they finally break out Cards Against Humanity, Shane braces himself for the all the dirty jokes Ilya’s about to throw his way (Ilya does not disappoint). 

To Rose and Sveta’s surprise, this is the one Shane wins, which he thinks is more important. Ilya just smirks, unsurprised. 

They’re all having fun. Ilya force feeds him some of those stupid sugar cookies and gets the icing all over his face, which he proceeds to lick off while the girls yell for them to get a room and stop being gross (with love, obviously). 

They put on a movie towards the end and Sveta throws popcorn at Ilya’s head when he won’t stop the sarcastic comments and rating the actor’s abs. 

Rose does her best to needle out information on Shane and Ilya’s relationship. Shane lets Ilya say a lot, but shuts down private details with a look (there is no way) he is letting Rose learn about the CCM shower. Or Vegas. He does not know her well enough. 

Sveta shares stories from hers and Ilya’s childhood. Shane likes the one where Ilya climbed a tree to pet a baby bird. He can totally see adult Ilya doing the exact same thing. 

Finally, midnight approaches. 

Ilya pulls him in against his side and kisses the top of his head. “You did well,” he murmurs. “It is good party.”

Shane hums happily and snuggles in. “Good.”

In the background, Rose mutters, “They’re disgustingly sweet. Like skittles.”

Sveta barks out a laugh. 

They all end up counting together, screaming the numbers at the top of their lungs. 

“Ten!”

He really has done well. 

“Nine!”

This is a good group, he thinks. 

“Eight!”

Good friends. 

“Seven!”

Shane can’t remember the last time he was this at ease in a group. 

“Six!”

This happy. 

“Five!”

He turns to Ilya.

“Four!”

His boyfriend is beaming, brighter than the sun. 

“Three!”

Shane wants to live in this moment forever. 

“Two!”

It’s perfect.

“One!”

Ilya kisses him, not even bothering to say happy new year first. Shane can’t complain when Ilya’s hands are on his waist, slipping into his shirt. He’s just pulling him closer. 

When they break apart, they rest their foreheads together. 

“Happy new year,” Ilya mutters. 

“Happy new year,” Shane echoes in Russian. 

“You know Russian?” Ilya chokes out, eyes wide. 

Shane shrugs. “A little. Sveta’s been teaching me.” He looks his boyfriend in the eyes and grins. “All the useful phrases.”

Ilya’s expression turns into something halfway between intrigued and horny. He raises his eyebrows. “Oh?”

Shane nods. “Yeah.”

“Like what?”

“I love you.”

Ilya’s eyes instantly begin to water. “No fair, Hollander. You are trying to make me cry.”

Shane only continues to grin and presses a quick kiss to his boyfriend’s mouth. “I love you, Ilya. Happy new year.”

“I love you too, sweetheart,” Ilya murmurs back. “I love you so much. Happy new year.” Ilya says something else, but Shane’s Russian is not nearly good enough to make it out. 

“Sorry,” he replies. “I didn’t catch that last part. After happy new year.”

Ilya grins. “Then it will be my secret.”

“He said ‘I can’t believe I get to spend the rest of the year with you. You make me the luckiest man on earth,’” Sveta yells. 

“Why are you paying attention to them?” Rose pouts. 

Shane turns to see the two of them clearly fresh off their own new year’s kiss. Sveta’s hands are on Rose’s waist and Rose’s are thrown over her shoulders. Sveta quickly kisses her. 

“Sorry, my flower,” she apologizes. “I will ignore the stupid hockey boys now.”

“Good,” Rose kisses her again, slightly more drawn out this time. “Because I have plans for this evening.”

Svetlana gasps, with mock horror. “Scandalous. Without buying me dinner?”

Rose grins. “Dinner first then. Any plans tomorrow?”

Sveta grins. “None.”

Shane turns to Ilya and smiles. Ilya smiles back. 

The party has been a success. 

#

Step Eleven: Profit.

They all help with the clean up and as Ilya and Sveta put dishes away, Shane catches Rose scrolling through her phone. 

“What is it?” he asks. 

“I was just thinking.” She sighs and turns to him, very serious. “Look, I know things are complicated with you and Ilya and you can’t consider coming out right now, but…. It makes me sad that you have to pretend to hate each other in public, so… what if you didn’t have to?”

“Explain,” Shane breathes out. 

“Look.”

She hands him her phone, open to the camera roll. He scrolls. There are images from the night, of the four of them laughing, joking, looking like friends. 

“I….”

“We don’t have to,” Rose hastily goes on. “But I could make a post, just the most platonic of the photos and we can start to tell the narrative that you and Ilya are friends. Maybe. Like you connected through Sveta and she forced you to get along, or something like that. I don’t know… it could be good, give you an excuse to be seen together.”

“Ilya!” Shane yells. 

“Coming!” Ilya calls back. “And I heard!” Ilya hurries over, Sveta at his side. “I like plan. Shane?”

“I….” He looks at Ilya. He wants to say no, but Ilya’s expression halts him in his tracks. It’s so hopeful. How can Shane deny this? “Okay, let’s do it.”

Rose grins. “Awesome, come on, group shot!”

“You already have group shots,” Shane grumbles. 

“But a deliberate one makes it seem less spontaneous. Now move!”

Rose directs them then and proceeds to take five different photos at different angles. Shane thinks it’s overkill, but who is he to deny her?

She and Sveta leave soon after. 

Shane and Ilya curl up on the couch. Ilya kisses him again. “It will be okay, Hollander,” he reminds him. 

Shane closes his eyes. “I know. Just hold me for a bit, okay?”

Ilya’s arms wrap around him. “I will never let go.”

#

Rose Landry🌹@RoseLandryOffical

[First photo: Rose in the front with Shane, Svetlana, and Ilya in a line. Sveta has her arms around both boys’ shoulders and their hands go around her middle but don’t link on the other side. It is possible they’re holding hands behind her back. They’re all grinning. 

Second photo: Svetlana throwing popcorn at Ilya’s head.

Third photo: Sveta and Shane throwing popcorn at Ilya’s head. Ilya’s hands are up to block it. He’s grinning. 

Fourth photo: Shane holding Sveta’s plate as she loads it with celery. 

Fifth photo: Shane smirking as he puts down a +4 Uno card. Ilya is pretending to faint dramatically. 

Sixth photo: Ilya talking animatedly while showing Svetlana and Shane something on his phone. They’re both leaning in to look. They’re both very confused.

Seventh photo: A few seconds later, Ilya’s still talking and Shane and Sveta look at each other with matching ‘WTF’ expressions.

Eighth photo: a selfie of Rose and Svetlana with Ilya and Shane playing rock, paper, scissors for some reason in the background

Ninth photo: Svetlana giving Ilya’ the middle finger. They’re playing Old Maid.

Tenth photo: The three others examining their cards for Cards Against Humanity. Shane very clearly has the most black cards]

Happy New Year from me and my friends! Best party ever!

❤️ by ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer, IlyaRozanov81, SvetlanaVetrova<3, and 1,842 others

Ilya Rozanov @IlyaRozanov81 

Ah. Good night with old and new friends. Send photos!

Rose Landry🌹@RoseLandryOffical

You got it!

Janet @JanetsLeftEyebrow

Hello? Mr. Rozanov, sir? WTF? WHY ARE YOU WITH THE ENEMY?

818 more replies

Shane Hollander @ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer

Thanks for coming Rose!

Rose Landry🌹@RoseLandryOffical

Anytime! 😉

Adam @AdamLuvsMetros

SHANE? WHY ARE YOU WITH THE RUSSIAN MENACE?

422 more replies

Sveta V @SvetlanaVetrova<3 

We should do this again!

Rose Landry🌹@RoseLandryOffical

YES! @ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer @IlyaRozanov81 What do you think?

Silly Billy @Metros4Life

No! Don’t do it!

Tod with the Bod @RaidersonTop

For once we can agree on something @Metros4Life

Silly Billy @Metros4Life

A Raiders fan? Eww 🤢🤮

418 more replies

#

Dad 📰

4:21 AM

Hey, kiddo! I saw Rose’s post. Your mother is going to kill you for hard launching a friendship with Rozanov without telling her in the morning, FYI. 

Anyway, I wanted to say that I love you so much and nothing will ever change that. Not even being friends with Rozanov. 

Wait, that sounds wrong.

I just mean that you have great taste and always befriend good people so if he’s your friend, I trust you and I want to meet him. I’m sure your mother will say the same once she calms down. 

We both love you so much and when you’re ready, we’d love to meet him. No pressure, just saying when you want to. And if you never want to, that’s also okay. We just love you, alright?

Happy new year, Shane. 

You are the best thing in my life. Talk soon!

#

Shane looks across the scrimmage line to Ilya, smiling. Rose is in the stands, wearing a Hollander jersey over a Boston Raiders shirt. Sveta is up there as well in a Rozanov jersey and a Metros shirt. Shane’s sure the fans are having a field day. They’ll be screaming for both of them and waiting after the game to drag them out to a club. Shane’s not sure he’ll like it, but he promised he’d try before Rose’s filming wraps up. 

But his favorite people will be there, so he’s sure it’ll be fine. And Ilya’s going home with him at the end of the night, so win or lose, the night will be ending well for him.

Ilya grins. “Ready to lose, Hollander?”

“Funny,” Shane quips back. “I was about to say the same thing to you.”

The puck drops. 

Game on. 

Truly, it’s a wonderful start to the year.