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A glimpse into the life of a human woman and her alien wife, and their adventures in interstellar family planning.
Adult content only. Please read the tags!
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
21 Oct 2024
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oh my god… so good. alien and human couple and they’re wives OH MY GODDDDDD
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one girl, three insects by Anonymous
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
08 Dec 2022
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‘One jumped on his face,’ Sylvain says, empathically. ‘And the others were crawling all over him. It’s a miracle we got them all off him given how tight their grips are.’
‘He was behaving strangely afterwards,’ Dedue pitches in, much to the obvious dismay of Annette. ‘Very flushed. Out of sorts.’
Out of the corner of her eye, Mercedes sees Sylvain unfurling his index finger to a solid point, eyebrows raised to stress his innuendo. Mercedes cheeks flush scarlet, a heat stirring in her tummy that she stubbornly ignores.
Or. Mercedes sates her curiosity by getting dicked down by three facehuggers.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,504
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 2
- Kudos:
- 100
- Bookmarks:
- 11
- Hits:
- 3,523
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
08 Dec 2022
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YAAAAAAA YAAAAAA YES YES YES THIS IS IT THIS IS WHAT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR FUCK YEAHHHH
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call it hope by theroyalsavage
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
17 May 2021
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Hubert von Vestra is single-minded, unsmiling, humorless, and cold, and Ferdinand has hated him since they were children. Unfortunately, it transpires, he is an easier man to hate from afar.
A Pride and Prejudice AU.
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
04 Jul 2022
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I AM SCREAMING PRIDE AND PREJUDICE FERDIBERT
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I Wanna Take You to a Gay Bar by orphan_account
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
30 Sep 2019
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Hubert learns something new about Ferdinand and isn't sure how to bring it up.
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
28 Jun 2022
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i love this so much oh my godddd hubert gets jealous of the men ferdie is hooking up with.. my favorite flavor!!!
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Sylvain takes Dimitri to experience a sex toy shop for the very first time. Dimitri gets to try something new.
Chap 2 is rated E - can be read alone.
“Are you sure it’s OK to go in there?” The door was frosted glass, obscuring any view inside, and Dimitri felt like he was doing something extremely taboo. If they had to frost the glass and block the windows, what was going on in there?
Sylvain’s laugh was a bark, and he turned to put a hand on his shoulder. It felt warm, too warm, on Dimitri’s light t-shirt. “Of course it’s OK to go in there! I told you already, I’ve been here before, it’s great! It’s the least judgemental place on earth.”
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a loving feeling by orphan_account
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
13 May 2020
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“Hey, Dimitri,” Sylvain started, jolting Dimitri's eyes open to the source of his roommate’s voice from above him. Alarm surged through Dimitri's body at the realization that Sylvain’s face was only inches away from his. He could make out the individual freckles that dusted his nose and cheekbones, painting a pretty picture that he had already seen before.
He averted his gaze and hoped Sylvain wouldn’t notice the blood rushing to his cheeks. “Yes?”
Sylvain straightened his posture to provide much-needed distance. “You never answered Annette’s question from tonight.” A sly smile danced on his lips as he continued, “Do you even know the answer?”
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do not pass go by karasunonolibero, keysmashlesbian
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
21 Feb 2021
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Hubert takes a deep breath and composes himself. “Ferdinand. You need to understand something right now. I am not your boyfriend at this moment.” Hubert leans in. “I’m your corporate nightmare.”
~
or, the chess club plays Monopoly.
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Stede had been hoping that, when he finally caught up to the Revenge, he'd be welcomed with open arms and the chance to make a romantic declaration of love. He hadn't expected to be thrown into the brig and tried for desertion.
(Since when did they have a brig?) -
like a flower in bloom, how the ink flows over your skin by ChangeTheCircumstances
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
12 Apr 2022
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Stede finds that being a convicted felon makes job searching near impossible when the owner of a flower shop takes pity on him and gives him a job. It starts as just Stede fulfilling the requirements of his parole. He certainly didn't agree to the offer with the thought the business and the people around it would change his life.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,574
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 1,049
- Kudos:
- 5,503
- Bookmarks:
- 1,095
- Hits:
- 75,575
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
05 Apr 2022
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flower shop/tattoo shop
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A Night At Blackbeards's Bar and Grill by soft_october
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
22 Mar 2022
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“Look - I don’t usually do this, but I am the food critic for The Anchor, and it’s imperative that I -”
“Oh, a food critic! Well that changes things.”
“Does it?”
“Sure. What was that name again?”
“Stede Bonnet. Food Critic, Stede Bonnet.”
“Right. Well, fuck off, Food Critic Stede Bonnet. Blackbeard’s Bar and Grill is all booked up.”The manager at the new restaurant Stede is trying to review is being kind of a dick. A certain member of the waitstaff, however, takes a bit of a liking to him.
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To Woo Like Your Life Depended on It by EverSquirrely
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
10 Mar 2022
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Hubert: I only wished to inform you that I coughed up petals.
Ferdinand: I presume you came to me for advice. If you tell me the object of your affection, perhaps we can-
Hubert: No need. It would be ridiculous for me to enlist you to help you fall in love with me.
Ferdinand: Oh! So when do you intend to woo me? I have a very full schedule, and if I recall your condition can be rather unpredictable. If you wish to woo me, you must let me know when, so that I may make myself available.
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
15 Mar 2022
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HOLY SHITTT THIS IS SO GOOD😭😭😭😭
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It feels intrusive, too intimate, and a little spike of shame pinches at Sylvain’s chest. “Do you want me to leave you alone? I can go, uh...sit in the bathtub or something.”
“If you need to go,” Dimitri says, his voice far away. “I...certainly wouldn’t blame you.”
“Most stubborn guy I know, really.” Sylvain steps forward, kneels at the bedside to look at him. “What do you need? Do you need me to go?”
To his surprise, Dimitri relents and shakes his head. “No. Stay, please.” His voice is winded now, and he’s pressing his thighs together in a weak attempt to stave off what Sylvain knows is coming. “You know what happens. You can...talk me through it.”
[Dimitri gets sex-pollened by some devious village girls. Luckily, Sylvain is there to help watch over him.]
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Incandescent by LeddyMirth
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
04 Feb 2022
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Hubert had accepted that he would spend the rest of his life in that small cottage deep in the Aegir forest, carving out a poor man's life, in hiding from his past and the church. He did not desire nor thought he deserved happiness. That was, until Ferdinand.
A folklore fantasy AU where Hubert faces his past and learns to love, and Ferdinand faces his future and learns to live.
“Allow me to introduce myself. I am the new lord of the territory, Ferdinand von Aegir.”
“It’s good to finally meet you,” Hubert replied, yet his pleasantries withered under the weight of suspicion, “but something tells me you didn’t come all this way in such a ferocious storm simply to introduce yourself.”
Ferdinand shifted, squeezing his sodden hat tighter. “You are correct. I have a request if you would hear it.”
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
09 Jan 2022
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AMAZING INCREDIBLE JAW DROPPING hubert is a mage in a land where magic is banned by the church and ferdinand is cursed how can this be even more up my alley i dont know its SO GOOD
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grasp by cybernekokaito
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
12 Sep 2019
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shortly after the holy kingdom's army & the leicester alliance form a truce, however temporary, claude pays a visit to the cathedral hoping to see a familiar face. what was originally an attempt to push the alliance leader away turns into... something else entirely.
takes place during the blue lions route.
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All of You by tinylightning
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
30 Apr 2022
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Summary
Exchanging gifts was one thing. Naming this unknowable thing between them... That was something else entirely.
The war was over, yet it hadn't gone unnoticed by Ferdinand that Hubert was disappearing for weeks on end, reluctant to tell him where he was going and why.
That is until Ferdinand and Hubert are abducted, locked away in a mysterious stronghold, and Hubert is forced to tell Ferdinand everything about their cruel captors. The deplorable history of Those Who Slither In the Dark.
Imprisoned together and facing their imminent deaths, what walls remain between them crumble, and for the first time in their lives Hubert and Ferdinand find themselves fighting for more than just the Empire.
"You cannot possibly grasp the importance of what I am doing. You would understand, fully, if you were in possession of all of the facts.”
Ferdinand sighed and sat down on the chair opposite him. “And the fact that I am not, whose fault is that?”
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 123,293
- Chapters:
- 22/22
- Comments:
- 296
- Kudos:
- 493
- Bookmarks:
- 86
- Hits:
- 11,261
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
30 Nov 2021
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THIS IS SO SO SO GOOD Ferdibert captured by TWSITD and escape!!!!!
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If Yunlan is going to learn how to make actual food that requires more effort than just boiling water and putting hot water into stuff, he’s going to have to take all the notes.
“Right,” he says to himself. “How hard can it be?”
He watches all twenty-two minutes and fourteen seconds of Chef Shen's video without fast-forwarding. When it comes to an end, he clicks on the replay button.
He ends up taking zero notes, and the only thing he manages to learn from the whole exercise is that Chef Shen -Shen Wei- is really fucking beautiful when he smiles.
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Spin Recovery by syailendra for yuureisen
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
11 Aug 2021
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Summary
Hubert’s expression of neutral displeasure curdles into a real frown. “I wasn’t aware taxpayers paid you to take creative writing classes.”
“These are real things you’ve said to my aides, Hubert,” Ferdinand says patiently. “I have a list. It’s printed out on very nice stationery, the thick kind, back in my office. On my desk. Do you want me to get it and read it out to you, so you can pick how you’d like to punish me for tarnishing Adrestia’s image?”
Minister Aegir finds himself in the middle of a PR disaster. Somehow, this ends up working in his favor.
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Spin Recovery by syailendra for yuureisen
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
11 Aug 2021
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Summary
Hubert’s expression of neutral displeasure curdles into a real frown. “I wasn’t aware taxpayers paid you to take creative writing classes.”
“These are real things you’ve said to my aides, Hubert,” Ferdinand says patiently. “I have a list. It’s printed out on very nice stationery, the thick kind, back in my office. On my desk. Do you want me to get it and read it out to you, so you can pick how you’d like to punish me for tarnishing Adrestia’s image?”
Minister Aegir finds himself in the middle of a PR disaster. Somehow, this ends up working in his favor.
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Hisoka is bored, of sex and everything else. Chrollo is a short, sleepy-looking museum curator who also happens to be a seasoned dom. They mess each other up.
Bookmarked by CaptainButts
26 May 2021
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wow wow WOW WOW THIS IS SO FUCKING GOOD
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a heavy heart to carry by unraelated
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
03 Jan 2020
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Dimiclaude week, day two: "Modern"
Six months after a mental breakdown, Dimitri meets Claude in his therapist's waiting room.