Emmerald_Chimera
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— I surpassed him, Dazai-san.
Dazai said nothing.
— He was weak. Useless. You have to admit I’m better, — Akutagawa pressed on.
Dazai still didn’t look at the young man. Hazel eyes followed the direction Chūya had gone. A long, motionless silence stretched between them like a black gulf.
— Better? By what measure? — Dazai spoke at last. His voice was flat and colorless, as washed-out as the Yokohama sky.
Akutagawa blinked. Something in him shifted — slight, almost imperceptible.
— Because I’m stronger, — he barked, hard and sharp, as if a crack of sound could force Dazai to see him. — We fought. He’s gone. And I — I won.
Dazai turned his head at last. Slowly, as if each degree cost effort.
— I don’t see a victory here, — he said, the voice low and dull, as though traveling up through water. — You lost. You lost to the monster inside you. -
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Позади него раздались шаги. Рюноске подошёл, останавливаясь настолько близко, что Ацуши почувствовал тонкий, изысканный аромат его духов — смесь прохладного утреннего леса и ягод можжевельника.
— И в чём был смысл этого? — холодно спросил Акутагава, его голос звучал сдержанно, но с ноткой раздражения. — Ты упорствуешь, Джинко, словно у тебя действительно есть шанс изменить что-то. Почему?
Ацуши на секунду замер, но ответил спокойно, пусть и с оттенком усталости:
— Потому что верю, что в каждом есть что-то хорошее. Даже если человек сам этого не замечает.
— Твоя наивность омерзительна, — отрезал Акутагава. — Ты всё ещё не понял, что твоя вера ничего не стоит. Особенно для меня. -
Journey to the Bottom (of the Bottle) by Emmerald_Chimera
Fandoms: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs
16 Sep 2025
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— Oof… Chūya-san, please get off me… — Atsushi groaned, buried under the weight, his voice laced with flustered complaint.
— Atsushi, for fuck’s sake, get your hands off my ass! — Chūya hissed furiously, struggling to get up, his movements clumsy from the alcohol.
— I-I’m sorry, Chūya-san! — Atsushi babbled in panic. — I just wanted to find the keys and then— oh, something soft…
— That’s… that’s my!.. — Chūya choked, the words dissolving into another angry hiss. The situation was spiraling fast.
“Mori-sama… If only you knew what I’m being forced to waste my time on,” Akutagawa thought bleakly. On the scale of absurdity, this mission was climbing straight toward a ten out of ten.
or:
Akutagawa was assigned to a high-level spy mission by Mori. But eventually the things became more complicated than he ever could think about...
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— I… — Atsushi tried to say something, but Akutagawa didn't let them get a word in:
— You're a MONSTER! — he shouted, slamming his fist into the wall next to them. — You sit here, staring at me with your glazed eyes and you think I can take it!
— I... didn't want you to feel hurt… — Atsushi said quietly, looking down at the floor.
— Hurt?! — Akutagawa laughed hoarsely and angrily, but there was hysteria in his laughter, more like sobbing. — You have no idea WHAT it is!
He abruptly grabbed Atsushi by the pecs, pulling them up with a jerk:
— You're sitting there, cold, dead! — he hissed through his teeth, so close that Atsushi could feel his hot breath. — You think I can watch you PRETENDING to be alive?! -
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— Я… — Ацуши попытался что-то сказать, но Акутагава не дал ему слова:
— Ты ЧУДОВИЩЕ! — заорал он, ударяя кулаком в стену рядом. — Ты сидишь здесь, пялишься на меня своими стеклянными глазами и думаешь, что я это выдержу?!
— Я… не хотел, чтобы тебе было больно… — тихо сказал Ацуши, глядя в пол.
— Больно?! — Акутагава засмеялся хрипло и зло, но в его смехе была истерика, больше похожая на рыдание. — Да ты понятия не имеешь, ЧТО это такое!
Он резко схватил Ацуши за грудки, рывком подтянув его к себе:
— Ты сидишь тут, холодный, мертвый! — прошипел он сквозь зубы, так близко, что Ацуши чувствовал его горячее дыхание. — Ты думаешь, мне приятно смотреть, как ты ПРИКИДЫВАЕШЬСЯ живым?!
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"Isn't he the child who murdered his parents when he was a toddler?"
Atsushi couldn't distinguish which wounds were old and which one's were new. In his cemented cell, he used his never-ending blood leaving his wounds to tally the days until he lift this wretched jail. He wrote on his thin blanket sheets using his sanguine fluid to write suicide notes, poems, or play tic-tac-toe with the voices in his head—never missing how you could see what was said, even though there were dozens of layers of gore laid on top of each other.
He's been here for five thousand one hundred, and thirteen days.
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BSD Psych Ward AU || Psych Patient Nakajima Atsushi, Psych Worker Akutagawa Ryuunosuke
(Mental Anguish, Grief, Insanity, Breakdowns, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Physical and Mental Illness)
ON HIATUS.
Bookmarked by Emmerald_Chimera
21 Sep 2024