HollyAHurricane



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    Barstool Sports Canada reports that Montreal Metros captain Shane Hollander has started learning Russian from new teammate and Russian rookie Sergei Dovonchezky.

    Ilya has some thoughts. None of them are particularly kind.

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    18 May 2026

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    Welcome to the secure chat room.
    Chatting with 10 users.
    You are user AU08

    Rozanov: I want to coordinate a mass coming out for a bunch of MLH players. If we all come out at once, no one has to be first.

    Or, after his father's funeral Ilya decides to gather all the queer hockey players for a mass coming out.

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    17 May 2026

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    “I feel really good about this kid, I think he could be great on your wing, he just needs some help settling in. Someone to show him the ropes.”

    “Yes.”

    The line went silent for a moment. Ilya wasn’t really sure why his coach felt the need to run this by him.

    “Rozanov,” his coach said at last. “I want him to live with you.”

    Ilya blinked, then nearly shouted into the phone. “What?”

    * * *

    or, Ilya stays in Boston, gets a rookie, and tries to figure out how to make a secret long distance relationship work while there's a Russian teenager in his house

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    17 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    19

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    jaden 🏒 @hollan0v
    shane hollander getting white girl wasted 🔜 ….

    ilya rozanov only fans @hockeyh8r
    please stop. shane hollander doesnt like alcohol he likes apple pie and baking cookies and his husband and thats IT

    jaden 🏒 @hollan0v
    @hockeyh8r he’s pouring one out especially for you tonight best friend

    Alternatively: Shane Hollander celebrates his hattrick against the Montréal Metros.

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    15 May 2026

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    Ilya still loves a terrible decision. Nearly ten years of exposure to Shane just mean that now, the terrible decision comes with a plan. This time it comes with bullet pointed lists, research. Fresh ideas scribbled late at night and stuck, one over the other, onto the fridge door.

    This crucial, terrible decision comes with deliberation and forethought and a twelve-step fucking plan.

    A plan that starts with ‘attend every game he can between the women’s league’s rivals-turned-wives Clara and Katya’ and ends with ‘kiss Shane on the mouth at center ice.’

    Because Icarus has nothing on Ilya fucking Rozanov. The internet is not ready. Yuna is going to have his head for this. Step one begins on Friday. He cannot fucking wait.

    --

    Half Ilya Rozanov POV and half social media fic tracking the chaos, managed and otherwise, that is unleashed as Ilya enacts his plan.

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    11 May 2026