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  1. Public Bookmark 29

    Words:
    28,569
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    29

    18 Oct 2021

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    When James Moriarty (the younger) was six, he witnessed James Moriarty (the older) plan the perfect murder of a classmate bully.

    When James Moriarty (the younger) was twenty-one, he began working for MI6 in the Q-branch department.

    (Things, of course, are never really that simple, and just get more complicated from there.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    94,097
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    207
    Kudos:
    523
    Bookmarks:
    194
    Hits:
    8,055

    17 Oct 2021

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    Part I: Twenty-one days after the Double-oh programme is reinstated, James Bond returns to MI6 with his Aston Martin and without Dr Swann. This is only the beginning of Q's problems.
    COMPLETE.

    Part II: The merger of MI6 and MI5 is complete and everyone around M seems to be losing their minds. (M-centric piece for merlenhiver.)
    COMPLETE.

    Part III: Prompt fill for the 00Q Prompt Party, minion-centric.
    COMPLETE.

    Part IV: The Great Interdepartmental Prank War of 2016®. Because Q insists on a Q-centric piece and mayhem follows James wherever he goes. Also, we all want Farid and Hayden to have more screen time, don't we?

    Words:
    100,834
    Works:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    526

    14 Oct 2021

  4. Public Bookmark 77

    Summary

    Werewolves and spies and fae...oh my! Tales (or should that be tails) of the werewolves of MI6 and their associated human relations.

    A Bondlock crossover using Patricia Briggs’ style (Alpha & Omega/Mercy Thompson) werewolves. (Please note: NOT an A/B/O universe)

    Words:
    101,965
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    77

    10 Oct 2021

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    191,764
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    172

    08 Oct 2021

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The kid stilled, his eyes going sharp in a way that made James want to reach for his weapon. He remembered he didn’t have one, then remembered he was talking to a 13 year old the size of a cocker spaniel and he didn’t need a weapon anyway.

    “Give me access to MI6’s computers and I could take over the world,” the boy said softly.

    “Not exactly what we’re trying to accomplish, but an interesting option all the same,” James said, pursing his lips. “What’s your name?”

    “Why?”

    “Because, if I’m going to recruit you that’s something I’ll need to know.”
    ***

    This is the origin story of Q/James Bond's relationship had they met quite a bit sooner in their MI6 careers. It is also a continuation/expansion of Jealous Gods, but it should make sense as a stand-alone piece. It will be formatted like Jealous Gods, going back and forth between present and past. Apologies in advance for any mistakes!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    92,626
    Chapters:
    50/50
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    1,797
    Kudos:
    5,078
    Bookmarks:
    1,242
    Hits:
    134,564

    25 Sep 2021

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    MI6 employed a broad variety of people with an equally broad array of sexual proclivities - no surprise in a place that trained and equipped international spies. Despite this openminded work environment, however, assumptions were made: obviously 007 was a hypersexual womanizer and the mild-mannered Quartermaster was asexual.

    When the reality turns out to be that 007 is ace and Q is actually into submission, life is bound to get more interesting.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    181,128
    Chapters:
    31/31
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    1,092
    Kudos:
    2,667
    Bookmarks:
    725
    Hits:
    82,064

    20 Sep 2021

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    COMPLETE! Bond finds himself increasingly curious about his enigmatic Quartermaster.

    Excerpt:

    "Your prior hotel is no longer secure, I will direct you to a new location. Your luggage has already been transferred. A field agent and medic from the Diréction Générale de la Sécurité d'État will be waiting at the side entrance. I have cleared them both personally." In contrast to his crisp dry English, Q's pronunciation of the French words was fluid and flawless, the throaty tone of the fricatives sending a surprising jolt of awareness straight to Bond's cock — all the more remarkable given his degree of blood loss.

    "You're wasted on Q-branch, you have the voice for a phone-sex call-in line." The words slipped out of Bond's mouth without forethought, although he had plenty of time to think in the sudden pause that came afterward and stretched on for endless moments. Bond hadn't realized until now how Q was always there, with an immediate reply. In all their banter Q had never before been at a loss for words. Ever.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    79,986
    Chapters:
    33/33
    Collections:
    13
    Comments:
    2,892
    Kudos:
    10,905
    Bookmarks:
    2,823
    Hits:
    292,801

    19 Sep 2021

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Two minutes in, he thinks, This is not so bad.
    Four minutes in, he thinks, We have to be close to being finished, right?
    Four and a half minutes in, he thinks, Good lord, I’m going to die.

    In which Q thinks that if M wanted him to tender his resignation, there must be easier ways to do so than requiring him to meet MI6’s mandatory physical fitness requirements. Particularly when M sees fit to assign James Bond as his personal trainer.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,810
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    52
    Kudos:
    662
    Bookmarks:
    123
    Hits:
    5,686

    18 Sep 2021

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It's common knowledge that angels make good weapons and terrible soldiers. They're hard to kill, hard to catch, and leave a swathe of destruction wherever they go. That's why MI6 likes them.

    James Bond, Agent 007, is one of the most devastating weapons MI6 will admit to having. Explosions follow his every whim and he's nearly impossible to kill, despite the best efforts of terrorists worldwide. He's second only to the weapons MI6 pretends don't exist- archangels are only a theory, after all.

    Aren't they?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    78,403
    Chapters:
    41/41
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    328
    Kudos:
    2,314
    Bookmarks:
    705
    Hits:
    46,294

    14 Sep 2021

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Mycroft's first big break comes with a price, a price that will change the lives of all three Holmes brothers forever.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    63,139
    Chapters:
    40/40
    Comments:
    139
    Kudos:
    910
    Bookmarks:
    266
    Hits:
    25,520

    13 Sep 2021

  12. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    78,741
    Works:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    251

    10 Sep 2021

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary


    "What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?"

    Harry gives him a slightly bewildered look and furrows his brow.

    "A porcupine has the pricks on the outside," Eggsy finishes.

    ~

    AU: Eggsy is a mechanic working in a garage owned by Dean.

    Harry Hart is Galahad, Dean is forever an asshole, and Lee Unwin and his death have no connection to Kingsman. In terms of setting, the Lancelot trials are over (Roxy won the spot) but the Valentine investigation is ongoing.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    69,562
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    343
    Kudos:
    3,110
    Bookmarks:
    1,070
    Hits:
    56,640

    02 Sep 2021

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ad left 10h ago in section male - male
     

    HHeart:
    Looking for someone to accompany a middle-aged man to a social outing in the country NEXT weekend. I only wish to make my homophobic mother squirm non-stop for sixty hours and nothing more. Successful applicant will be rewarded handsomely. Cash bonus on offer if you are one or several of the following: young (must be eighteen or over - no practical joke is above the law), working class, someone with an extreme aversion to received pronunciation or in possession of a strong regional accent/dialect.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    92,600
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Comments:
    462
    Kudos:
    2,483
    Bookmarks:
    504
    Hits:
    39,000

    02 Sep 2021

  15. Public Bookmark 69

    Tags
    Summary

    Harry Hart is the enigmatic and wealthy head of the Kingsman Group, a financial behemoth with long-reaching arms. Logan Davis is a former F1 driver turned casual mechanic, known to most as Merlin, a nickname from his racing days. It takes Harry about 10 seconds to realize that he wants to know everything about Merlin, but Merlin’s lived the fame and fortune life already and isn’t easily courted. Fortunately for Harry, he’s got two dedicated life advisers to keep him from putting his foot in his mouth too much.

    AKA: Everyone is a hopeless nerd and I wanted an excuse to make Harry the awkward one this time.

    NOTE: THIS STORY IS NOW COMPLETE!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    56,900
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    172
    Kudos:
    342
    Bookmarks:
    69
    Hits:
    5,425

    01 Sep 2021

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It is a truth universally acknowledged that every good story has its Lazarus.

    (or; the one where harry hart dies, and then lives again)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,816
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    121
    Kudos:
    717
    Bookmarks:
    209
    Hits:
    10,806

    31 Aug 2021

  17. Public Bookmark 27

    Summary

    This is the story of the agents Percival and Lancelot. The story takes place through their first meeting after James won the position of Lancelot in 1997 until the pivotal meeting with Gazelle in 2015. There is a canon and a fix-it ending for these two, allowing the reader to decide which to choose.

    Besides that, there will more than likely be several one-shots that did not make it into the final story that I will publish later on.

    Words:
    105,142
    Works:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    27

    30 Aug 2021

  18. This has been deleted, sorry!

    25 Aug 2021

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    My 2019 Fandom Trumps Hate offering. The winner asked for a story where Eggsy comes to Kingsman, NOT as an agent but in some sort of support capacity.

    Eggsy's driving gets him into trouble with the filth but thankfully he remembers the medal around his neck. One phone call as an act of desperation changes his life...and leads him to saving the world.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    52,333
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    275
    Kudos:
    1,266
    Bookmarks:
    346
    Hits:
    15,029

    18 Aug 2021

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    175,916
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    524

    13 May 2021

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