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“If you wanted to see me that bad, you could’ve just asked me out.”
There’s a choked sound from the chair. A muffled laugh, quickly swallowed.
Buck’s eyes flick, just once, toward the chair, and then he flushes so fast it’s equal parts alarming and endearing.
“I’m fine,” he says, each word coming with its own zip code.
He always does that. It’s their routine, their little dance. He tries to bolt, she gives him a reason not to, without calling him out. He acts like it doesn’t hurt, she pretends she doesn’t notice the way his jaw tightens, the tremor in his hands.
This time, though, it doesn’t get that far.
“What you are is stubborn,” the guy in the chair says. If there’s meant to be an edge to it, Sam can’t find one. “You took a pretty bad hit to the head, Buck. The helmet came off. You should let them check you out.”
Buck rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t argue. Doesn’t even try.
That’s new.
Sam studies him for half a second, then gestures. “Okay, chin down.”or, Buck and Eddie being perceived by an ER nurse for a decade
Series
- Part 5 of buddie nde fest
- Part 3 of mathematically inevitable
Bookmarked by berocium
28 Mar 2026
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“I don’t know what you want from me anymore,” Eddie says through the door, his voice worn thin at the edges. There’s a soft thud against the wood, and Buck doesn’t need to see it to know – Eddie’s forehead resting there. “Talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to say,” Buck replies. The words come out flat.
“How about when you said you don’t need me?”
Buck exhales, slow and heavy.
Because that’s it. The lie he wants to believe because believing it would make everything hurt less. The one that keeps failing him – failed him today, almost got him killed, almost pulled him down into the pit because for one terrifying moment he was sure Eddie was gone.
One bad call, one broken dam, and suddenly Buck and Eddie aren't pretending anymore.
Series
- Part 2 of buddie nde fest
Bookmarked by berocium
28 Mar 2026
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“This is the most thought that anyone, of all time, ever, has put into adjusting a driver’s seat, Eddie.”
“Buck—”
“I’m serious. That rearview mirror has lived through so many angles and lives in the past six minutes that it’s about to start recounting its first-hand experience on the Titanic.”
Just for that, Eddie reaches up between them and tweaks the mirror again. A ray of sunlight hits it and bounces across Buck’s eyeline. Buck’s face scrunches up as he rushes to shield his forehead with one hand. It does not remind Eddie whatsoever of a small, bashful dog hiding behind its soft paw, because that would be deranged. He twists the mirror back into position.
“The Titanic probably would have gotten us to Nashville better than this truck.”
Buck’s indignant squawk rings out in time with the turnover of the engine as Eddie hits the ignition.
or
Gay Thoughts: A New (Nissan) Frontier
Bookmarked by berocium
28 Mar 2026
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i know it’s not very sexy when somebody loves you this much and knows you this well by fleetinghearts for greencreekwolf
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
29 Jul 2025
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Summary
“I mean,” Eddie backtracks hastily, “that I probably don’t—uh, that I don’t want a hook up. Just the single, uh, kiss. For research.”
“Right,” Buck nods. “For research.”
They turn back to the TV, sipping beers and spooning dessert, room quiet save for the telenovela playing. Buck, gun to his head, could not tell you who or what is on the screen right now. The brave, strong part of his brain has surrendered shamefully, white flag hoisted while the rest of his brain—stupid, stupid—hosts a skillfully imagined supercut of his best friend kissing men. It’s surprisingly new subject matter for him. What’s unsurprising is his distaste for every conjured scenario, discarding each indistinguishable stranger until the reel buffers on something more… familiar.
“Well—”
Eddie waits a patient minute for Buck to continue before asking, “Well, what?”
“I just mean—if it’s just a kiss, right.” Buck pauses. “You could, uh. You could try it with me.”
or, buck thinks kissing men and women feels pretty much the same. eddie’s not buying it. sometimes settling a bet requires kissing your best friend, a lot, for research
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,773
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 194
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- 4,061
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Bookmarked by berocium
28 Mar 2026
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One day, Buck will tell an interviewer that he would be happy to make movies with Eddie Diaz until the day he dies.
But first, years before that, he sees Eddie for the first time on the set of Chimney’s fifth movie.
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or, the actors au
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 130,340
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 714
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- 4,619
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- 2,054
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- 113,513
Bookmarked by berocium
28 Mar 2026
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“I’m not trying to keep tabs on you,” Eddie adds, like he knows exactly what Buck was about to accuse him of. “You don’t have to tell me everything. Just… don’t disappear on me, alright?”
Eddie lingers for another second, and can feel the Eddie wants to say more but he nods once and steps out of the locker room, leaving Buck alone.
Buck stands there for a moment, one hand braced against the open locker, breathing slower now but not calmer, because Eddie’s words stick in his head.
Don’t disappear on me.
OR
After the kidnapping, Buck says he’s fine.
Everyone lets him.
That works, right up until it doesn’t.Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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It has been a year since Bobby’s death, and Buck has never been the same. Grief eats at him in quiet ways the rest of the 118 can’t quite reach, so when he announces he’s taking a break and heading abroad, everyone tells themselves he deserves the space. A week later, he disappears. Weeks turn into months, and the people he left behind are forced to believe the unthinkable—that Buck walked away for good. Until the headlines change, and the word “presumed dead” settles over them like ash.
What none of them know is that Buck’s story didn’t end there. His grief, his secrets, and the dangerous truth he’s been carrying all lead back to a past no one at the 118 ever imagined. And when the pieces finally surface, the loss they thought they understood becomes something else entirely.
How will the 118 deal with losing people they love, only to find out later that it was all a lie?
OR
Buck disappeared, and the truth might destroy what’s left of the family they built.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 104,402
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Comments:
- 204
- Kudos:
- 391
- Bookmarks:
- 153
- Hits:
- 17,353
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Across the room, Chim groaned, leaning on his pool cue like Buck’s whining had physically worn him down. “For the love of God, just go on a date already! Eddie, take him out. Maybe then he’ll stop talking about it.”
Eddie blinked, caught off guard. “Excuse me?”
Hen snorted, immediately catching on. “Not the worst idea.”
OR
It started as a joke—Eddie needing to take Buck on a date. We all know what happens next.
Series
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Buck saw a man at a fire scene. Just standing there. Watching him.
Days later, Buck and Eddie vanish.
What connects them is a face, a car, and an armband tattoo found in more than a dozen cold cases.
OR
That tattoo wasn’t just a pattern. The victims weren’t just missing. And Buck was always going to be the last one.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 70,276
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Comments:
- 124
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- 647
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- 195
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- 15,053
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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“He told me he loved me.” Buck’s voice was quiet, fragile. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the sting that came with the memory. “I didn’t say it back.”
He let out a shaky breath, rubbing his face with both hands, his chest heaving. The pain, the grief—it had never left him, but now it was raw, it was real, and it was breaking through everything he had tried to hold back.
“I didn’t say it, Eddie,” he whispered, voice cracking. “I didn’t… I didn’t even say it. And now he’s gone.”
OR
After a rescue mission ends in collapse, Buck and Eddie find themselves trapped with no radio, no way out, and too much unsaid between them. In the quiet between disasters, they’ll finally face what’s always been there. Post-8x17.
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Eddie makes his way to one side of the table and Maddie sits down on the other side and they both sip their coffee in silence. They’ve never been alone in a room together. The thought hits Eddie like a flash-bang. How is that possible? They’ve known each other for almost a decade now. They share a person. Well, they share a lot of people, but especially one person.
“He looks better today,” Maddie says, and Eddie is relieved. He feels sick when he thinks about Buck, but thinking about Buck is the only thing he feels capable of doing.
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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"No, no, no. Eddie please, don't do this to me," he begs. There's tears now flowing down his face, he's sure of it. He gets onto his knees, palms joined together. "Please, Eddie. It was, I don't know, fuck, it was a mistake, okay? I–I'm in so much pain still, okay? I'm in pain and–and the doctors don't care. They don't care that I wake up every day in pain, they just want to c-call me an addict. And I'm not, Eddie, please, please, Eddie—"
"Stop," Eddie warns. "Buck, please stop talking. This. Fuck, this is bad, Buck. I–I have to report you."
or, a 9x15 coda but also like if eddie found buck in the ambulance and no alarm went off
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Summary
Buck tries to apologize to Eddie. Eddie tries to apologize to Buck.
In the end, it's all just another word for love.
Series
- Part 30 of hearth & home (rain's 9-1-1 drabbles)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,238
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 36
- Kudos:
- 292
- Bookmarks:
- 40
- Hits:
- 1,700
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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“Eddie.” Maddie’s voice is soft as she pads into the room, slippers sinking into the fluffy rug. “I’ve got him whilst he’s sleeping, if you want to go home?”
Her hand settles on his shoulder, gently squeezing the tense muscle. Eddie shakes his head, digging his fingers harder into his legs.
“No,” he says, the word cracking in his throat. “No, um, I think I’ll stay.”
He can’t let Buck out of his sight. He just– He can’t.
Every time he looks away all he can see is Buck’s panicked eyes, the yellow pill bottle, Buck hunched over the toilet as tremors wracked through his body, chest spasming.
Buck looked so scared. He looked so scared.
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Summary
Maddie’s eyebrows rise, and she looks past Buck to Eddie, the corners of her mouth curling upwards. “My kisses don’t work on Uncle Eddie,” she says, and if she thinks Buck misses the way she says it—Uncle Eddie—she’s sorely mistaken. He knows exactly what she’s doing.
And he realizes too late that that means he should probably be afraid.
Jee gasps, eyes going wide. “What?” She asks breathlessly. “Then how will his ouchies get better?”
Maddie hums thoughtfully—performatively—before her eyes slowly slide over to Buck. He starts to shake his head, unsure exactly what she’s about to do but deeply aware that he’s not going to like it. “I have heard,” she says, leaning into her like she has a secret, “That best friend kisses are just as good as mommy kisses.” She tosses her hair over her shoulder and looks at Chimney. “And almost as strong as daddy kisses, too.”
--
or, Buck kisses Eddie's ouchie
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Summary
He could fall asleep like this, maybe, leaning on Eddie. He's comfortable, slowly warming where they do touch, and he can even ignore the way his neck is going to get a cramp as long as neither of them move a muscle and nobody turns the big light on and the nausea doesn't surge up again and his head doesn't start splitting in two. Maybe he could get a half-hour's sleep in, even. A cat basking in the sun, Buck could shut his eyes and stay right here forever.
or: Buck's withdrawal leaves him freezing. Eddie keeps him warm.
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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And here’s the thing. If Buck was paying just a little more attention, he probably would’ve clocked what the pain in his middle meant a lot sooner. It wouldn’t change the outcome, sure, but he’d at least be ahead of the curve.
The worst part is that it’s all rather obvious in retrospect, because the signs are all there. The flickering lights. The gymnasium air rippling and warping like heat off pavement. The dark patches on everyone’s suits and dresses.
He should’ve seen it.
But all he sees is Eddie. Everything else is just white noise and set dressing.
—
Or: Buck's never been to prom.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,126
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 92
- Kudos:
- 707
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- 189
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- 10,868
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Buck is staring at his ceiling, flickering city lights breathing through the window above his bed. He's been crying a lot lately. Over wet dishes, over sunlight hitting his furniture at pretty angles, over nothing at all. It’s how it always starts.
He gets emotional; then he gets numb. He never manages to settle on which one is worse.
This is the part where Buck realises, quite matter-of-factly, that he’s probably going to try to kill himself.
Or: Buck keeps it together until he can't. Luckily, he's got Eddie—and he'll be damned if he lets his best friend slip through the cracks. It takes two.
Series
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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“Oh my God, I’m fine.” Buck says, sounding exasperated. “Will you—will you stop acting like you’re my fucking boyfriend?” he snaps.
Eddie shakes his head, “Acting like... What is that supposed to mean?” he narrows his eyes.
Buck huffs, “You know what it means, Eddie. I can’t—You’re not.”
“Bullshit.”
(Or, after coming back from New México, Buck is going through a lot, and he keeps pretending he’s not. Luckily, Eddie sees him.)
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026
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Summary
He feels like shit when he's hungry, and he plays better when he's empty. The cold air doesn't touch him as much. The floodlights turn silvery-soft.
And he likes eating. Keeps his hands busy, mouth busy, mind busy. Something to chew through, putty in the ears.
Go until he can't anymore. Cycle it back out. Be ready.--
OR: Buck's had on-again, off-again bulimia since he was 14.
--
Title from Psychic Friend's "We Do Not Belong".
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 442,043
- Chapters:
- 40/40
- Comments:
- 2,106
- Kudos:
- 1,881
- Bookmarks:
- 688
- Hits:
- 113,006
Bookmarked by berocium
27 Mar 2026