hellyr (gaffa)
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Summary
When Mark realizes that Helly doesn't always get a lunch, he does his best to help her out.
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‘Are you implying that “baby goats” is code for sex with Mark S.?’
‘Mhm.’
‘Wow.’
‘So... is “baby goats” code for sex with Mark S.?’
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An alternate ending to 1x05.
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But she can’t ignore it—can’t ignore the way that the blood rushes in her ears, the increase in her heart rate when he so much as grazes by her, the catch in her breath when he strokes her shoulder with his thumb, crashing her back down to reality. He repeats himself, but his voice is far off in her ears, and she’s elsewhere, grabbing at some semblance of normalcy by trying to pretend that every last thing about this place is hell. She comes up empty.
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Helly hates that she wants him so badly.
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On the first page, she just scribbles a few times. Looping, arching shapes, rambling thick lines, scratchy in the centre where she presses down onto it with her middle finger, ink staining the grooves in her skin. When there’s no more room, she tears it off, crumples it up, and tosses it back into the drawer.
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or, five times Helly was weird about a pen, and one time Mark brought it up -
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She’s been used her whole life, as a family prop, as corporate propaganda, as coerced labor, as a punching bag. Now, she’s going to use someone for once.
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Reintegration sucks.