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  1. Tags
    Summary

    “In fact, all I want is a conversation,” Alastor hums, as if a conversation between them is something normal. It happened once or twice, if that much, when they both were at their lowest after that TV-headed demon nearly fucked them both up, before fighting was back at the table. “I'm sure your Majesty can spare a few minutes to listen to his humble servant?”

    “Humble? Doubt it. Servant? I wish,” Lucifer grunts. “At the very least you'd respect me.”

    “Hm, who can say,” Alastor shrugs, stopping his pacing right in front of Lucifer again. “But I do have a bottle of Beelzejuice I got from contraband that I'm willing to share with you for your trouble.”

    Lucifer narrows his eyes, wondering what the fuck the Radio Demon could want, seeing the way he looks at Lucifer with his head tilted slightly, waiting for a response.

    -

    Spring comes to Hell the same way it comes to Earth, and, with it, comes the heat/rut season. Lucifer is not happy to go through it alone another year after Lilith's leaving, when the Radio Demon makes a proposition he hadn't been expecting.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,941
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    76
    Kudos:
    606
    Bookmarks:
    138
    Hits:
    7,197
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Even now he can see the zeppelin with a poor quality and blurred picture of himself climbing up to Heaven from his tower, the words ‘Don’t Miss It! The Truth: Today At 11 P.M., Sponsored by Voxtek (Radio Demon's Broadcast at 10 P.M. On The Stupid Radio, Not Sponsored)!’ shining down on him. It makes his ears flatten, and a growl leaves his lips as he watches it.

    His eyes drift to the other side of the tower, the one where he could see the apple tower from, wondering if Lucifer was even aware of it all, despite the blaring advertisement flying over the Hazbin Hotel right now. Either the little Devil was freaking out in his tower, or fully asleep or absorbed in one of his projects, continuously oblivious to the world around him.

    -

    Alastor has lived in the shadows his whole life, nothing he hasn't wanted has come out to the light about him. His performance stayed intact in life and death, and yet a slip is enough for everything to gradually come into view.
    When everything is exposed, what can he choose to keep?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    54,705
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    71
    Kudos:
    189
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    3,840
  3. Tags
    Summary

    There are many things Alastor regrets doing, and yet he's still on the fence about where he stands with the Hazbin Hotel.
    But the reason he's still on the fence with the hotel is behind the big, ornate doors he crosses, his ears twitching as the scent hits his nose. His body relaxes immediately, whatever worries he’d had during the day vanish as the smell of his pregnant Omega reaches him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,264
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    340
    Bookmarks:
    31
    Hits:
    2,797
  4. Tags
    Summary

    He should be mortified about what's happening, and what he has allowed to happen every once in a while. He should be disgusted, should use his holy light to push off the demon that soils his body the way he does— but he doesn't. He just lays there, squirming every once in a while at a sharper pain, writhing only when he allows himself to panic over choking on his own blood like he could actually die from it.

    It's a wretched sight, and yet he feels whole for the first time in millennia as the pain settles, and as his executioner and savior alike takes and takes and takes.

    -

    Lucifer's unhealthy way of coping.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,971
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    71
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    562
  5. Tags
    Summary

    He stares at the last slide, a hand-drawn image of Lucifer and Sera— he knows it's her, he'd recognize her anywhere, even if Charlie hasn't gotten better at drawing from when she was a kid to now— holding hands at the gates of Heaven, with rainbows and fireworks exploding in the background and the handwritten words “Best Plan Ever!” scribbled on top of the drawing.

    He's pretty sure he's not breathing, nor moving an inch, his stillness that of an inhuman creature as he tries to wrap his head around what Charlie is asking of him.

    -

    Lucifer goes back to Heaven as part of Charlie's plan to strengthen the bond between Heaven and Hell and to show both sides are working together. He's not prepared for it, never was, but an unexpected company proves that there's still hope, after all.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,376
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    53
    Kudos:
    308
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    3,763
  6. Tags
    Summary

    How many drinks had he had before the dreadful experience? He counts on his fingers, one, two, three…

    Must've been more than three, for sure— Alastor can hold his alcohol pretty well— he must be forgetting some drinks in between. That must be it.

    Husk would most likely know how many, although he doesn't want to go downstairs again. His room is comfortable, so is the couch he uses as a bed when he's feeling like laying down. Besides, the joke had started there.

    The Devil walks into the hotel's bar…

    -

    Alastor is at a crossroads: he has the King of Hell to himself, power at the palm of his hand, but the cost is higher than what he had been willing to pay. He finds himself dealing with just how dangerous the Devil really is, and how much one might lose control if one does not pay attention.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,460
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    39
    Kudos:
    210
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    2,482
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Such a simple fucking message, and yet it leaves Lucifer spiraling. What had changed? What had changed? What had changed?

    “You sure look glum.”

    The voice makes Lucifer jolt, his eyes widening as he raises his head to see shadows materializing into a tall nuisance with deer antlers and a curious smile. Lucifer doesn't even have time to react before Alastor is lowering himself, bending in half to be face to face with Lucifer.

    -

    It's the anniversary of Lilith's leaving, and Lucifer is tired and would rather isolate than do anything else. Alastor comes to force him into movement.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,048
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    241
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    3,016
  8. Tags
    Summary

    “An offer?”
    “Well, yes. One you should take, if you don't mind me saying,” Alastor says, his voice smooth as he turns his staff in his hand before slamming the flat tip on the ground and walking a few steps towards Lucifer. “We both know you got subdued by Vox only a week ago…”
    “Don't speak as if you didn't get fucked as well,” Lucifer mutters, watching as Alastor starts pacing around him like a predator.
    “Fucked up, your Majesty,” Alastor corrects, his voice clearly displeased as it comes from both his mouth and the radio, creating an eerie feedback that makes Lucifer's skin prickle.

    Alastor makes an offer, and Lucifer is reluctant to take it. A simple deal, although nothing is simple with the Radio Demon involved. Especially the feelings.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,864
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    605
    Bookmarks:
    54
    Hits:
    7,796
  9. Tags
    Summary

    He freezes as he opens the door, seeing the radio demon standing there, and his next decision is simple to make. The door slams shut before Alastor can even say a word.
    “Well, that was rude!”
    Lucifer jumps, his back hitting the door as he turns to see the radio demon behind him now. The sneaky little shit…

    OR Lucifer is drained after Vox's little trick, and Alastor comes to help him out.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,220
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    859
    Bookmarks:
    61
    Hits:
    10,169
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Missy is changing, and the Doctor wants to prove it— to her, to the others, to himself mostly— so he takes her to an adventure where she'll take the lead alongside him. It should be simple and easy, but he stumbles upon something dreadful for both of them.

    A Gallifrey rebuilt on nothing but memory, and a distress signal no one claims to have sent. It suddenly becomes a task to the Doctor as much as it is for Missy to navigate through it all.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,105
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    440
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “Isn't there anywhere we could go?” He asks, his voice quiet as he looks at the center pillar, restless and needing to leave the ship for a moment. “Anywhere he wouldn't cause trouble?”

    The TARDIS doesn't respond, mostly because it can't, although he sees his screen light up for a moment. Coordinates and a date shine on the monitor, and the Doctor's lips widen into a smile, a giddy expression on his face as he quickly navigates the ship to those coordinates and that time exactly.

    { }

    The Doctor and the Master find themselves stuck on a planet, the TARDIS having left them behind, and it's the end of the world. With one day to live, there's only so much they can do but talk, for once.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,634
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    59
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    341
  12. Tags
    Summary

    For Time Lords, friendship is not the same as it is for humans. Time, and the understanding of everything that the universe is, makes a bond between two Gallifreyans something deeper than the normal eye could see. So of course Missy questions the Doctor about why exactly he calls his companions friends.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,639
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    45
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    275
  13. Tags
    Summary

    The whole time, Dr. Smith watches him, and Harry tries not to pay attention, to ignore the other man's gaze, until it becomes too much. He glares, dark brown eyes meeting the doctor's, making the other man raise his eyebrows for a moment before approaching him.
    “Can I assume you're going to talk today?” The doctor asks, his hand gesturing for the chairs in the room, facing each other. He hates those chairs.
    “Not bloody likely,” he grunts.

    { }

    Harold Saxon is a patient at the St. Jude's Psychiatric Hospital in the countryside of England due to his unstable and aggressive behavior, even if he has no idea how he had ended up there, or who had brought him to that place. He just knows he hates it, and that he hates the doctor who keeps trying to treat him even more.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    61,614
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Comments:
    73
    Kudos:
    155
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    2,399
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Vinsmoke Sanji is chosen by Queen Sora as the rightful heir of the Germa throne on his eighth birthday. Unhappy with the choice, his father sends him to die after taking the power from his wife's hands.

    Bruised and weak, nearing death— that's how he meets Zoro, the boy-dragon who saves and helps him recover despite Sanji's lack of hope. That's how they grow together, traveling alongside each other to escape the ones who hunt for Zoro due to what he is and the ones who could figure out Sanji is still alive. It's how they build a life together.

    It's how they take back Sanji's throne.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,039
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    120
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    1,338
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Zoro just needs to unwind, and Sanji's willingness to help disguised as indifference makes him cave in to the young blonde's masked pleas. He was not ready for how inexperienced the kid actually is.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,754
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    590
    Bookmarks:
    54
    Hits:
    7,061
  16. Tags
    Summary

    The locals of that island had warned him and the other Strawhats about it, about their traditional drink for celebrations such as these. It's a psychedelic drink made with local mushrooms, used to make everyone a little looser and happier to enjoy the festivities at full.

    He's heard the drug tends to make people a little looser sexually as well.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,245
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    668
    Bookmarks:
    58
    Hits:
    7,071
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Sanji struggles in her marriage, unable to feel pleasure with her husband and afraid for her son and what his father will do if he finds out he's gay.

    That's when she meets Zoro, who helps her to feel less alone through her distress.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,741
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    267
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    3,104
  18. Tags
    Summary

    He clicks on the link. It redirects him to twitter, and Zoro goes still immediately once the post opens, his eyes widening as the pictures load. Whatever he's been expecting, it surely wasn't that.
    _
    OR Sanji is the proud owner of a femboy account and posts adult content to the internet to get by in life; Zoro just happens to like the man's smile (and content). Shenanigans ensue.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    118,233
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    852
    Kudos:
    1,960
    Bookmarks:
    351
    Hits:
    43,336
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Zoro is a mailman. Zoro also has no sense of direction. Of course he'd deliver a package to the wrong address, but at least he gets something out of it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,589
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    733
    Bookmarks:
    70
    Hits:
    6,189
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Pale, long fingers press a little against his jaw, forcing his mouth open. Zoro's lone eye leaves the cook's face to look at the cock in front of him, hard and leaking, waiting to be inside the swordsman's mouth again, despite how it feels like it just won't fit.
    _
    OR Judge-sized Sanji gets head.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,399
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    527
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    6,265

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