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What if instead of blowing up his old life to move to Schitt's Creek, Patrick had signed up to be on the reality dating show Mr. Right? And what if David was that season's Mr. Right? What if Stevie was the cynical but soft producer and Ronnie the grouchy director, and all your favorite minor character hotties were living in the suitors' mansion? Surely there would be romance and humor and deception and longing and tenderness!
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David took a deep breath and announced gravely, “Patrick, you should probably know that I am good in bed.”
Patrick looked at him with a mix of confusion and maybe a touch of amusement. “Well, I suspected as much, but I was hoping to confirm it for myself.”
It's the first night at Stevie's. David is nervous and overprepared. Patrick is sweet. They work it out.
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“Now, you know the consequences, darling. Let’s go upstairs.” Henry took Alex’s hand and led him up to their bedroom. Alex followed pliantly, silently, as if in a trance.
Alex is a mess. He's overextended, overworked, and resorting to taking his law school classmate's Adderall to manage his workload.
Henry knows what he needs. Spoiler alert: it's a spanking.
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“Patrick, what’s Rachel’s last name?” Alexis had addressed invitations to all the names on the list, but she hadn’t seen one for Rachel.
Alexis assumes Rachel is invited to the wedding and stirs up some angst between David and Patrick. Good thing she's available to fix their lives.
Oh, and David is not happy about Rachel's middle name. (Rose. It's Rose.)
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The smile on your face lets me know that you need me by hollybibble
Fandoms: Schitt's Creek
08 Dec 2019
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David Rose is famous for his smile.
David is daydreaming that he’s Julia Roberts in Notting Hill again. Patrick catches him. Fluff ensues.
Recent series
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Sex Bloopers by cinnaluminum, Distractivate, hollybibble, kiranerys42, nervouscupcakeinspace, orphan_account, Point_of_no_return, reginahalliwell, sullymygoodname, thegrayness, unkindravens, WellSchitt, whetherwoman
Fandom Schitt's Creek
21 Aug 2020
- Words:
- 33,778
- Works:
- 16
- Bookmarks:
- 54
Recent bookmarks
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It arrived on a Saturday afternoon. David approached it warily, a looming presence in the corner of their new house where he had planned on a tasteful seating grouping. Having missed the spectacle of its arrival, it almost felt to David as if it had simply appeared. An ominous warning that his worst fear may well be realized: the person you marry does not stay the person you marry.
"Relax, David. It’s just a piano," Patrick says.
Or, a little bit of sentimental fluff about how Patrick learns to play the piano.
Bookmarked by hollybibble
25 Jul 2019
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Patrick, 8:25 pm: Okay, Stevie says it’s me or the lice? We really shouldn’t risk it spreading to the store.
Patrick, 8:25 pm: I just got done at the gym, I’m picking you up in twenty minutes.Shit fuck motherfucking goddamn bossy nice boys in Sears shirts.
(an AU of 3.11)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,949
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Comments:
- 294
- Kudos:
- 1,522
- Bookmarks:
- 254
- Hits:
- 21,426
Bookmarked by hollybibble
22 Jul 2019
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But Then You Found Me (And Everything Changed) by Lily_Padd_23, supernatural_mondler (starzinoureyes)
Fandoms: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
19 Jul 2019
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Henry accidentally asks a question. Alex is more than ready with the answer.
Bookmarked by hollybibble
20 Jul 2019
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David knew very little about sports, but he knew a whole lot about Patrick.
Bookmarked by hollybibble
13 Jul 2019
