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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane had agreed readily. Yes, he wanted. To be hunted by a stranger with twenty dogs and a knife on his belt. To see him again. To find the source of the squirming thing in his chest and bring it to light.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,542
    Chapters:
    14/?
    Comments:
    894
    Kudos:
    944
    Bookmarks:
    316
    Hits:
    24,884

    23 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane lowers his voice. “I didn’t think you were serious about that.”

    “Yes, you did.” Rozanov has a way of talking that makes it feel like he has more teeth than a normal person. How a shark has two rows so that a second always snags you, scrapes off the perfect amount to swallow you whole just when you think you’ve survived the first. “When am I not serious about you, Hollander?”

    or: Shane wants to see exactly how they fit together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,758
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    163
    Kudos:
    1,106
    Bookmarks:
    183
    Hits:
    10,905

    03 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 75

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    Bodies are easy, warm, and solid, not hazy like memories. Ilya likes his: likes how it looks, how strong it is, how fast it can go. What he likes even more is watching it collide with others: on the ice, in the club, on rumpled sheets of nondescript hotel rooms. Like a vulture addicted to flesh, Ilya circles the periphery of danger, searching for warmth, hooking his sharp claws into anything that touches. If sometimes those things leave him ravenous, so be it. He’s never one to beg again.

    Ilya moved to Ottawa for Shane. This is him in his first real relationship.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,478
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    54
    Kudos:
    384
    Bookmarks:
    75
    Hits:
    4,760

    02 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You are…” Ilya licked his bloodied teeth and tried to remember the word. “Squeamish?”

    “No,” Hollander said. His eyes were still so wide, tracing over Ilya’s bruised face like searchlights. “Fuck. Just—”

    He stepped back, stumbling a little on socked feet, and jerked his head at the doorway. Get in.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,114
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    129
    Kudos:
    2,199
    Bookmarks:
    488
    Hits:
    14,249

    01 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    The only trick is to have no fear, and even less fear than that the more trouble one is in. Ilya cannot teach that to a man who has directed his energies into becoming, not like a saint, but like a painting of a saint, all dripping in symbolism: the way the robe drapes here, yes, that is on purpose, and the angle of the light, the patron’s face in the crowd, the instrument of the martyrdom in his hand and the fruit in the bowl on the table, all arranged except when—

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,832
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    116
    Kudos:
    1,152
    Bookmarks:
    327
    Hits:
    7,642

    31 May 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    When Shane Hollander looks into the future he sees— not a flat sheet of ice, not that, not anymore, but something equally as empty.

    His backup plan was always to go to university. He hadn't thought he'd ever need it, not really. Especially not near the end, when everything felt so certain. But his grades were good, his mom made sure of that, so when he woke up in the hospital he already knew what he was going to do next. But after?

    There's a standard path people take, he knows, that comes after school. But when he tries to picture it, slot himself into the picket fence and the corporate overhead fluorescents, it disappears. Like it was never going to be real at all.

    (Or: after ending up at a jazz bar to celebrate the end of finals season, Shane Hollander finds himself where he never thought he'd be— in the orbit of NHL superstar Ilya Rozanov.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    59,204
    Chapters:
    7/10
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2,048
    Kudos:
    4,469
    Bookmarks:
    2,264
    Hits:
    147,017

    30 May 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    1. yearning in vermont
    2. flat tires in quebec
    3. taking kitchen liberties
    4. yearning in montreal but with hockey
    5. baby's first gay bar
    6. baby's first gay bar, ambitious edition

    this is a repository for sundry one-shots and character studies

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,500
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    539
    Kudos:
    1,169
    Bookmarks:
    273
    Hits:
    21,652

    26 May 2026

  8. Public Bookmark 94

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    Summary

    He himself would agrue that it’s his self-discipline, but the best parts of Shane will always be the hard parts, the rough bits, the hockey player parts. It will always be the warm, slightly damp skin in the crook of his elbow, the bicep that Ilya’s cheek cuts into. It will always be his grip strength and the fidelity of his wrist. It will always be his red face when he yells at the ref. No one sees that, or they don’t believe it when they do, and it baffles Ilya to this day. He wants the world to notice, and he wants to feel it upon himself. But Ilya’s already succeeded in getting Shane to fight him on the ice, so he guesses what he really wants is to be spanked.

    Or: Ilya Rozanov learns to ask nicely.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,710
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    59
    Kudos:
    670
    Bookmarks:
    94
    Hits:
    7,002

    21 May 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Ilya, what are we gonna do?” Shane says.

    Ilya finishes whatever he has been doing on his phone, and tosses it gently to the bed beside him. He crosses the room to Shane, stands in front of him, squeezes into his shoulders with his big hands, rubbing them like he means to warm them up.

    “Looks like we will have a little vacation,” he says, with a big obnoxious grin.

     


     

    Boston and Montreal are sent to Paris to play against each other in an exhibition series in January 2017. Ilya and Shane decide to stay in Paris for one more night. Just one more night, so they can talk. Maybe finally understand each other.

    They aren't expecting a volcano to erupt in Iceland and close all the airspace in Europe, leaving them stranded there. Together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    127,267
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Comments:
    4,336
    Kudos:
    15,194
    Bookmarks:
    6,568
    Hits:
    467,818

    12 May 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Following a forced and early retirement from the NHL, Shane Hollander finds himself spending his days working at the local Omega Shelter where he can still make a difference with his life.

    One evening in early autumn, a bloody and bruised Ilya Rozanov walks into his arms and changes the projection of his life forever.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,716
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    633
    Kudos:
    1,535
    Bookmarks:
    477
    Hits:
    41,906

    30 Apr 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    That thought settles into his brain dangerously. Ilya’s been with everyone. Girls. Guys. Others. What's another person on the list?

    If Shane wants experience…

    If he wants to stop feeling behind…

    Why not Ilya?

    Yes, he was a complete asshole that Shane wished he could choke to death sometimes and his brother's childhood bestfriend, but it wouldn’t mean anything. It's for the experience, the education of it all.

    For hockey.

    Obviously.

    Or: Ilya Rozanov has always been Shane Hollander’s older brother’s best friend. He was never supposed to become Shane’s first everything.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    65,916
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    1,587
    Kudos:
    11,822
    Bookmarks:
    3,751
    Hits:
    312,326

    30 Apr 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    At some point their relationship got fucked up enough that Ilya helps wax Shane’s pubes when they’re in town together, instead of doing normal couple things like watching Iron Chef or having brunch. Ilya thinks it started happening around, after the time he had to beg Shane not to bleach his asshole but before they both started peeing while taking showers together. “I just want a clean slate,” he tells Ilya very seriously, but they come to a compromise that he should keep something short and trimmed above his dick. Ilya, on the other hand, is under strict instruction to never touch any of his pubic hair, lest Shane have nothing to hold on to when he’s working the head with the back of his throat, so it’s kind of a shock when he says, “We should wax your ass too.”

    Or: Ilya Rozanov gets fisted.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,647
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    194
    Kudos:
    2,420
    Bookmarks:
    559
    Hits:
    26,937

    22 Apr 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya rubbed at his face with both hands, trying to knead the heaviness away. It didn’t budge.

    Probably just caught something from the kids, he thought to himself. Some kind of virus.

    Except he'd been feeling like this for weeks now. Maybe longer. It was hard to tell. The days blurred when you were tired, and he’d been tired for longer than he wanted to admit.

    Maybe it was something still lingering in his system. That happened sometimes, right? Viruses could hang around. He'd read that somewhere. Post-viral fatigue.

    Yeah. That was probably it.

    Some dormant virus still working its way out of him.

    Or,

    Ilya and Shane are married with kids, living the life they fought for. But Ilya's depression is rearing its ugly head again.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,084
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    200
    Kudos:
    2,718
    Bookmarks:
    307
    Hits:
    30,991

    09 Apr 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    It’s maybe a little unhinged, a tiny bit irrational… but Shane is officially at war with Ilya’s jeans.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,564
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    117
    Kudos:
    2,055
    Bookmarks:
    232
    Hits:
    10,977

    07 Apr 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Turns out Shane was always a chatterbox, he just needed the right motivation. Have you heard the good word about our lord and saviour Ilya Rozanov?

    Part one is a series of scenes wherein David Hollander demonstrates his superior emotional intelligence, Rose Landry collects besties like shiny marbles, Hayden Pike does his best (bless him), Yuna Hollander is everyone's momager, and Svetlana Vetrova commands the will of men.

    Part two features Shane learning to extend his newfound communication skills to the bedroom, courtesy of some helpful coaching from Ilya.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,382
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    298
    Kudos:
    3,229
    Bookmarks:
    1,010
    Hits:
    33,120

    06 Apr 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane Hollander is worried about everyone and everything.

    Ilya is mostly just sick of air travel.

    Or:
    Shane and Ilya are having trouble balancing their very private relationship and their very public lives.

    A slice of life.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    85,532
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    1,174
    Kudos:
    14,239
    Bookmarks:
    5,594
    Hits:
    360,018

    04 Apr 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "We are actually so fucking washed," Shane bitches. "I'm never getting better and you are stuck on a losing team that sucks. Everyone is going to forget about us."

    "Don't make me trip you," Ilya says, calmly. "Let's do another lap."

    "No," Shane barks. Ilya raises his eyebrows.

    Shane refuses to accept this. This perpetual cycle of suck. When he invited Ilya to his cottage almost four years ago now, he didn't expect their relationship to turn into their fucking burial ground.

    Shane finds himself grounded in Ottawa for the foreseeable future. With his newfound free time, he hangs out with his family, eats Costco Rotisserie chicken, and whips Ilya Rozanov back into a champion.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,683
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    475
    Kudos:
    3,191
    Bookmarks:
    754
    Hits:
    37,846

    02 Apr 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    cens interacted x3 | lau @laullipop

    yall ilya rozanov is in the er with me rn holy shit 

     

    cens interacted x3 | lau @laullipop

        hollander is here too !!! theyre so cute, hollander is wearing a bears tshirt

     

    cens interacted x3 | lau @laullipop

        rozanov is apologising profusely but hollander keeps waving him off, looks like he has some kind of ?? face?? injury??

     

    cens interacted x3 | lau @laullipop

        every time rozanov speaks, hollander replies over text it seems… that or hes ignoring him LMFAOOO

     

    lexi loves ! 💕@lexlance

        girl…. lets use some critical thinking here, should we be live-tweeting the emergency room ??

    or: Shane would like one day to pass where he doesn’t go viral on twitter.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,137
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    263
    Kudos:
    11,226
    Bookmarks:
    1,237
    Hits:
    52,110

    30 Mar 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    They’d had it planned out for at least two months. Well, Shane had, at least. His plan made the most sense: His parents were in Ottawa. They could drive, they had room in the house, and they loved Ilya. 

    Ilya had pushed back. He could drive. He had a big, empty house near the surgery. And he loved David and Yuna, but he could take care of himself. 

    They had argued back and forth for two full weeks, neither willing to admit defeat. But the dentist had been pretty fucking clear that the anaesthetic would be strong, so Ilya wouldn’t be able to drive himself anywhere, or even look after himself, for at least a day. Two days, in some cases, and he’d have pain and swelling for up to two weeks. 

    Ilya has his wisdom teeth removed. The sedatives have some unexpected effects, and Yuna feels like a mom again.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,897
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    126
    Kudos:
    7,366
    Bookmarks:
    938
    Hits:
    68,385

    30 Mar 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya laughs. He finds that once he starts, he can't stop. He laughs at the fact that he's in France with Shane Hollander. He laughs at the fact he's Shane Hollander's boyfriend. He laughs at the fact that he gave up Moscow for a better life, only to end up in fucking Ottawa. 

    Ilya's dick stops working one month before he's supposed to leave for the South of France. 

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,053
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    706
    Kudos:
    8,379
    Bookmarks:
    2,850
    Hits:
    181,232

    29 Mar 2026

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