Chapter Text
Chapter 1 - Fear of Imprisonment
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Crunch...
Crunch...
Crunch...
Went the dry decaying leaves giving away every time her foot sunk onto new ground. Crushing the leaves and gravel beneath her feet, and marking her footprints on the terrain.
For a while, she would have made a difference. Until the wind would push the loose grains of soil over her marks, and covering them with more fallen leaves. Finally disappearing and never to be seen again.
Reminiscent of her decisions.
Clementine stared down at the passing terrain, her focus traveled beyond her feet. The sight of the forest bed below turning into nothing but blurred trails of red, yellow, and orange colors zipping by. Feeling an airy breeze once in a while that would gently rock her curls and brush her skin.
She imagined she was gliding high above the forest, letting the gentle forces of the wind carry herself across the landscape drenched in the golden light of dawn.
Just like a bird. Free and relaxed as her wings catch the wind and drift her across the earth. Staying far away from the dangerous world that roamed below.
She found comfort in letting herself get lost in fantasies like these, being a kid once again. Relishing feelings of freedom and carelessness.
Or scraping away at a clean sheet of white copy paper with crayons, or leaves. Creating renderings of fantastical worlds, or past memories. Memories like when she visited the botanical gardens once, on a school trip.
She was constantly searching for new ways of expression. Learning new skills that would help her draw more lines and shapes, attempting to capture the wildest imaginations.
But only for a short while...
No matter how hard she tried to lose herself in her those childish thoughts, inevitably it would all come crumbling down once again. Like a vicious tsunami, ripping through a prospering city.
Jolted out of her childish thoughts she felt the cold, harsh surface on the handle of the pistol she held. Pricking and marking her palms with a large rash. It's razor-sharp edges cutting into her fingers as they curled tightly around each corner of the gun.
Sweat pooled in her grip, making it harder to keep the weapon in place. The weight bearing down on her arms more and more with each step.
Gripping the gun for protection.
For dear life.
She trailed slowly behind Christa and Omid. The both of them stayed quiet as they strolled through the forest. Calmly, but laser-focused as they followed along the gravel trail. Hopefully leading to another shelter, or another place with supplies.
Omid would look back from time to time and catch the devastated expression that was engraved on Clementine's face.
Occasionally catching her eyes once in a while, and giving her a warming smile in return. Trying to assure her that everything is going to be okay.
She hoped so...
She tried to gift him one back, but the corners of her mouth were tied down permanently.
She kept her distance as they had enough to worry about when it came to finding a safe place to stay. Especially that of a child who had a tendency of getting others killed... she thought pessimistically.
So she just kept to herself.
Her eyes were bloodshot, still stinging and brimming with leftover tears. Her innocence was ever so slightly draining with every teardrop that threatened to fall. She was left feeling nothing, mind void of any thoughts or emotions.
All that was left was nothing but the empty shell of a little girl.
The faces of the dearly departed would often come back to haunt her mind. Their deaths replaying in her mind like a broken record.
She couldn't help but think if she was to blame for them.
She knew for certain about one death she was responsible for. The one 'decision' that would permanently make its mark on the world for worse.
Just then, vivid images of the past several hours rushed back into her mind. Sparking and flooding her senses with every recorded detail.
Perfectly recreating the most horrific moments of her life. Moments that would forever continue to plague her, until the day she dies.
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Several hours ago...
Clementine sat alone in a rusty bathtub. Knees curled up to her chest. Arms wrapped around her shivering legs, trying to cling onto any semblance of warmth.
It was uncomfortably cold, and eerily quiet. The claustrophobic bathroom was drenched in the deep blue light of twilight, piercing through two small cracked windows in the bathroom.
Every tile was coated with a thin layer of dust. Mold prospered in the corners of the room. Leaving a dry and musty stench that never left her nose.
Any sound she made reverberated against the bathroom walls. Amplifying it and making it ear piercingly loud against the unearthly silence that settled in the room.
Her wrist throbbed a bit from the iron grip that was held on her as she was dragged into this place. Lips bleeding from the pressing force of the stranger's arms as he blocked her screaming cries of help. Frozen with fear, and too powerless to fight back against the captor.
She grew more and more desperate with each passing second. Wanting to escape purgatory, and run back into the warm and comforting arms of her beloved guardian.
Despite her desperation, she wasn't even sure if he knew where she was. Even after she had tried to tell him on the walkie, but didn't get a chance to hear a response. Certain that her efforts were futile and worthless.
As far as she knew, she's stuck here. Held at the mercy of the man that led her astray. She hated the fact that she believed him. Leaving her to follow nothing but distant ghosts from the past.
She should have known that he was promising a reality too good to be true.
Her foolishness led her here, and she didn't want to wait to find out what other malicious plans the stranger had in line for her.
So she tried the only thing she could do... She tried to be strong, for Lee.
She needed to find a way to escape.
She scanned around for one. Looking back up, her eyes landed on the two windows perched high above the bathtub.
Her first option.
She raised her small shaky body to the side of the tub, and carefully climbed up onto the rim. Leaning against the wall she pushed herself all the way up on her toes to reach the window.
It was a little too far up, but too small to crawl through even for her.
Maybe she could try to squeeze through? It's possible, but she would have to break the window, and there wasn't anything in the bathroom she could use.
Well except her hands, being the only thing left at her disposal.
Fueled with determination, she stretched her left arm up to the cracked glass. Extending her hand to get as far up as she could reach, only managing to get a couple of inches above the window sill. Feeling the rough ridges and crevices scraping the tips of her fingers.
Her mind then stopped herself abruptly for a moment.
What would happen if the stranger came in and saw her like this?
No, he probably wouldn't. She hasn't heard anything outside since she was held captive. There was a small chance, but she just had to be quick.
But what if she was too loud? Would he come crashing in, and receive further consequences for doing so?
Probably... but she couldn't care less. She was desperate.
She had to get out.
She wound up her left arm back from the window sill, ready to bash. Then jumping up, and with as much force as she could muster in that single swing, she smashed the glass.
The sound was very loud, several cracks sounding at once. Feeling her hand pass successfully through the barrier.
Before claiming victory, a painful stinging rapidly devoured her left fist. She immediately reeled it back to her stomach instinctively. Whimpering as the pain began to sear and spread all throughout it.
She unsteadily raised her left fist to survey the damage, and it wasn't pretty.
Several deep gashes ran across the base of her fist and fingers. Small fragments of glass were stuck to her hand, with blood that began to ooze through the now opened tissue. Trailing down her hand and dripping into the tub. Mixing with the dust, small patches of dirt and mold that was littered throughout the tub.
Horrified with the damage she shoved her fist back against her stomach, hoping to stop the bleeding. Letting it dry and coagulate, the blood staining her shirt.
Looking back up at the window, she did make a decent-sized hole on the glass. However there were still quite a few razor-sharp pieces still stuck to the frame, but she couldn't risk cutting herself up more by ripping the rest of the shards off.
Now she had a few open wounds, and who knows how sanitary the glass was. With that knowledge the chances of getting an infection only skyrocketed.
Going out of the window was no longer an option, much to her dismay.
Her breathing became more irregular at that realization. Desperation setting in once again as she scanned around, hoping for something to catch her eyes.
Landing on a white wooden door, the main exit.
Her second option.
It didn't come to mind initially because she was certain that it was locked, and it wouldn't have been that easy. Despite that, she gathered enough strength to drag herself to the other side of the tub. Carefully stepping over it and onto the floor. Tiptoeing quietly towards the exit. Raising her right hand up to the rusty handle, she wrapped her fingers around it. Grabbing it tight and twisting it downwards.
It was unlocked.
She then pulled back away from the door and it gave way, filling her with a sliver of hope. Why hadn't she tried this in the first place? Cursing herself.
However, her hopes instantly vanished as the door stopped abruptly.
Desperation brewed once again, she kept pulling harder but it stayed in place.
Pulling again, and again, and again.
Getting rewarded each time with a growing sense of dread and ice-cold chills that rushed throughout her body.
Once again, going out this way was not an option.
She whipped her head around, panting. Eyes rapidly moving around every inch of the place, searching for something.
Anything.
Then they finally landed on something.
There was a large vent on the wall, sat above the medicine cabinet. It looked a little smaller than the vent back at the dairy farm's meat locker, which meant only one thing.
She could crawl through.
It was the third option.
Still holding her left hand against her stomach, she unsteadily shuffled over to the sink. Reaching her right arm up around the corner, and with the help of her left leg, she swung herself upwards. Getting getting on top of the sink.
Standing up cautiously, propping herself against the wall with her right hand as the dusty porcelain sink-top was rather slippery. Sliding the hand up onto the vent, eyeing it closely.
Four flathead screws sat on each corner on the vent cover.
With no tools at her disposal, she had to rely on her hands again, or rather her right hand.
She curled her fingers around the screw to twist it out of place.
It was on tight and it didn't budge, as expected. But she tried harder, shuffling her body into a comfortable position to gain more leverage. Moving her right foot to the corner of the sink.
However, that proved to be a fatal mistake.
Her foot slipped off the porcelain sink-top, throwing her body backward and tripping over the rim of the sink. She crashed down onto the incredibly hard, cold, and rigid tile floors. Smacking her head against it, and landing on her left side.
Stunning the left shoulder entirely, ribs absorbing most of the impact. Feeling the stiff bones rattling and compressing her organs as they rocked downwards toward the floor. Pain devoured her entire skull, due to the massive whiplash. Crying out in pain.
She laid there on the floor, whimpering. Teeth gritting and biting down hard on her tongue. Each shaky breath sucking in the musty bathroom air in a desperate attempt to try to diminish the pain the best she could with all the strength she had left.
Pain...
Pain...
Pain...
She couldn't think of the past, or the future.
She was stuck in the present moment. Hyperaware of every detail picked up from her senses.
Her body begging to remedy the situation, but there wasn't anything that could be done in the moment. She had to wait for it to pass.
Unable to move her head or eyes, she reached around with her right hand, feeling the icy tiles for any hole or cracks on the floor that maybe lead to a sign of escaping.
A fourth option.
But there was nothing.
She was imprisoned.
All of her decisions mounted up to this point.
Trapped, with no way out.
Eyes burning with painful tears, limbs shaking from the lack of warmth.
She was powerless to do anything.
Racking her brain for anything to keep her going, any semblance of comfort.
Wishing that it all was a bad dream, that she would wake up and be right back home with her friends and family again.
But nothing came up.
She couldn't take it, she broke.
Her heart shattered. Crumbling into millions of pieces, and scattering into a vast and empty void.
She was alone, with nothing but misery keeping her company.
And misery loves company...
She started crying uncontrollably, exhausting herself as she lied on the floor. Weak and powerless. Unable to control and muffle her agonizing sobs. The sounds echoed back to her, like a copy cat child, mocking her pain.
Everything hurt. Her agonizing cries drained the life from her soul.
She couldn't stay strong anymore.
She was terrified of never seeing Lee again.
Terrified of what would happen next, what other plans the stranger had for her.
Why did she run away, she was still perfectly safe.
She had a roof over her head, food to eat, and a bed to sleep in.
Best of all she also had friends with her.
Or did...
Carley lied on the side of the road with a gaping bullet hole in her forehead.
Lily, being the murderer, was left behind to rot.
Duck succumbed from the bite he got back from the motor inn raid.
Katjaa killed herself because she couldn't come to terms with Duck's inevitable death.
Ben was dropped to his death during the escape from Crawford.
And everyone else, she left behind.
Christa, Omid, Kenny, and Lee...
Lee was nowhere to be found.
Maybe he died too.
Maybe they all died, trying to find her.
She was foolish enough to open up and talk to a stranger on her walkie-talkie. Venting to him about everything that happened. Everything about the motor inn, her friends, and Lee.
Worst of all, the stranger then held a promise that he had her parents.
And she believed him.
When Lee silently told her there was no time to search for them, she couldn't take it and ran away. Thinking she could take matters into her own hands. Little did she know it was a perfect opportunity to get kidnapped.
She just wanted to go back home.
She wanted to go back home and see her friends again.
She wanted to go back home and see her parents again.
Most of all, she wanted to go back, and be with Lee again.
Out of the ashes of pain, regret, loneliness, betrayal, and sadness. A memory of him surfaced without warning.
She clung on to it, letting it take over her senses. Drifting her away into the past, letting it become her reality.
Even if it was for a short while.
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The night sky glistened beautifully with the endless constellations of stars that were peppered throughout the vastness of space.
The moon bloomed brilliantly in the night sky. Reflecting dim sunlight off the lunar surface and back to earth. Draping a blanket of deep, blue light that illuminated the landscape. Revealing vast cornfields and grassy hills that rolled off into the night.
It was the perfect temperature outside. Not too cold, and not too hot. It was just right.
A soft breeze glided through once in a while, tenderly brushing over the blades of grass sprouting from the soil.
Clementine lay curled up on her makeshift bed. Listening quietly to the subtle sounds of wind funneling through the crevices of the barn's wooden walls, and the rustling of grass dancing outside in the wind.
No crickets were chirping this night.
It was incredibly peaceful.
Lee was next to her in the barn, eyes open, staring into the ceiling where the night sky poked through some of the planks of wood sitting above.
He didn't look tired. Instead, he looked almost distant, deep in thought. Clementine still didn't know too much about him, but despite that she felt very comfortable being in his company.
The both of them taking refuge in Hershel's farm, after escaping the death ridden suburbs of Atlanta.
It was a welcomed change in scenery. It felt normal again, quiet and peaceful compared to the past few days. The serenity of the night lulling her to sleep. She felt her eyelids wanting to close together like two magnets, growing closer due to the force of attraction.
It got stronger the longer she resisted, but she just wanted to hold them open for longer so she can cherish the moment.
"My mom played the tuba." - Lee said. Pulling Clementine out of her thoughts.
"Really?" - she said.
"Yeah" - he answered, chuckling at the thought.
"It was strange... She was a really small lady." - He couldn't help the grin that began to grow on his face as he began recalling a memory.
She could agree on it too, imagining a small woman with a tuba. Dwarfed in comparison by the size of a massive brass instrument. How was she even able to hold it?
"This one time my brother thought it would be funny to fill her tuba full of flour on April Fool's Day... And that same day, she thought it'd be funny to wake me up for school by playing it right in my face."
"What happened?" - she questioned, though she could see where it was going.
"Just about what you'd expect." - Lee finished.
She couldn't help but giggle at the scene that her mind painted.
A teenage Lee sitting upright in bed, drenched with flour. Wearing a frown on his face. His sheets powdered with nothing but a blanket of white. His mom on the side of his bed with her tuba, laughing, and seeing his young brother peering into his room with a smirk on his face.
"That's funny." - she commented.
"Yeah... I don't know why I remembered that." - He quietly spoke. A smile plastered on his face.
A smile.
Even back then when she didn't know much about him it warmed her heart, he was so kind, and had an aroua of security that surrounded him. She wondered if he had any kids.
He reminded her a lot about her dad.
Her dad.
The last memory she had of her parents appeared in her mind.
Driving away in the car, waving their hands' goodbye as she stood on the driveway next to her babysitter Sandra.
It stung her heart.
The only thing they left behind was a hat, marked with a logo of their favorite baseball team. Every time she saw it reminded her about her parents, and she wore it with pride.
It was their mark on her world.
She had been alone for a few days, surviving on her own, but she constantly held on to the hope that just someday, they would come back home.
"I miss my mom and dad..." - Clementine softly spoke.
Lee turned his head to her, immediately concerned with the sudden change in tone. He watched her expression slowly drop the further she fell into thoughts about her own family.
Then he thought quietly about what she said. Instinctively turning his head back up towards heavens as he too, began to fall deep in thought.
He hasn't seen his family in months. After the incident, he wasn't allowed to talk to them.
Even if the circumstances were vastly different compared to her own, he couldn't help but feel the same as her.
"Me too..." - Lee solemnly spoke.
Clementine did a double-take on what he said.
Not expecting to ever hear something like that from a man like him, but it wasn't really all that strange the more she thought about it.
Seeing the carnage in her neighborhood, knowing that many families and kids would be split apart from each other. Either by fleeing with no line of contact with each other, or worse... Literally being torn apart by monsters.
She doubted that would apply to her parents. They were smart and they would know what to do, but she couldn't help but wished they haven't gone to Savannah.
Thinking about the city, she realized that she didn't know too much about it. She visited many years ago when she was much younger but couldn't remember how far it was.
"How far is Savannah?" - Clementine wondered.
"Pretty far." - Lee answered.
"Oh..." - she said.
Stinging her a bit as it dawned on her that it would be a longer journey than she thought.
Lee picked up on her solemn response and turned to look at her. Seeing a sad expression dawning on her face.
"I won't leave you alone." - Lee said, with a smile once again.
She looked up and stared back into his warm and comforting eyes.
He didn't waver, he held his ground because he wanted to assure her.
She could tell that he meant it, and couldn't help but let the corners of her mouth move up. Revealing a grateful smile.
Knowing at that moment, he would there for her.
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The door suddenly shook violently, and Clementine immediately bolted backward in fear.
Shuffling back away from the door until she hit the bathtub. Fear flooded her system and she quickly shielded herself, burying her head behind her shaking legs. Preparing for the inevitable wrath of the stranger, she closed her eyes and kept sobbing quietly. The pain still present.
She heard the door creak open and stop, followed by a menacing silence.
She didn't have enough strength to raise her head to see the captor, she stayed where she was and continued sobbing.
"Hey, honey..."
Her blood ran ice-cold.
The voice was uncomfortably steady, and calm. It was the same voice on the radio, the same voice that lied to her.
She couldn't respond, gripping herself much harder as she heard every little rustle from his clothes. He walked quietly towards her and keeled down slowly. Stopping at a distance.
Staring quietly at her.
"I'm not... going to hurt you" - He spoke. His speech was very stilted and slow. It was really uncomfortable so she just continued to ignore him.
"I promise." - He said.
'I promise.'
Promised.
Like he promised her, about her parents.
He lied.
He fucking lied.
But why?
He sighed at the lack of a response from her, sensing her subtle hostility.
"I'm not a bad man... I'm just a... Dad." - He spoke quietly.
She slowly raised her tear brimming eyes and scanned the man kneeling in front of her from a distance.
He had pale skin, scruffy brown hair, and was pretty slender. Despite his lacking frame he towered over her, even from a distance. His most striking feature was his eyes.
Pale blue eyes that showed no sign of emotion. Making it difficult for her to gauge how much danger he posed.
"I can take care of you... We can have a family." - He spoke.
She froze, realizing the intentions behind those words. Not noticing more pain settling in the same spot she was digging her nails into, to the point that she was certain that blood was seeping out.
She never felt so much regret at that moment. She told him everything over the walkie-talkie. Especially about Lee, and she could tell that he didn't like him.
The stories she had told the stranger only acted as timber to the fire. Fueling it as it raged behind those ice-cold eyes. Seeing that Lee was nothing but a dangerous man.
Despite that, there was one thing the stranger never saw...
Even if Lee was in the wrong, he always managed to pull through to keep her safe. To keep everyone safe.
He tried his absolute hardest to save everyone, but the world would always push him to make difficult choices, and she can't blame him for that.
No one can.
The stranger gave up and stood up slowly. His full height becoming clear. He turned around slowly and walked out of the bathroom. Stopping at the door frame, turning his head to look at her.
Remorse flickered behind his pale blue eyes as he was met with the sight before him.
Clementine was sitting by the bathtub. Curled up, knees up to her chest, and shaking uncontrollably. Her right hand gripping her left shoulder, still holding her bloody left hand against her stomach.
Her head was raised slightly, staring back at him. She looked a bit pale, and her cheeks were wet with fresh streams of tears that kept flowing down her face. Her glassy amber-colored eyes, shinning red with devastation, and biting back at the captor's eyes.
He then turned around and finally left.
Closing the door with starling force. Fiddling with the doorknob for a bit until it stopped, followed with muffled footsteps that faded away until they vanished.
She was left alone, again.
Left with nothing but her sounds of unsteady breathing, and menacing silence following in-between each breath.
She felt a slight pinch against her waist.
Reaching down with her right hand she felt for the location of the pinch. Forgetting that the source of it was in her pocket.
She reached in and felt it's a smooth surface, grabbing it and pulling it out carefully, feeling the rough edges on one side of it.
She moved it out and brought it into view.
It was a photo.
A photo of Lee, from the pharmacy.
Just him, torn away from the rest of his family photograph.
Just like how he was torn away from his real family, before the apocalypse.
Just like many families were too.
It burned her eyes the longer she looked at the photo.
Brimming with tears as she reached out with her fingers.
Hoping to feel his comfort again, but only felt the smooth surface of the photograph.
She missed him.
She wanted to be with him again.
She wanted to be wrapped around his arms again.
She wanted him to tell her everything is going to be alright.
She felt the world splitting in two again, and cried.
Squeezing the cherished photo of Lee close to her heart.
Silently promising herself.
She would never leave him again.
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