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Adam had first seen her when he was twelve.
He had been sitting outside the trailer, because it was very hot and stuffy inside, reading a book that his teacher had assigned, when he had seen her peek from behind a small bush. She had been a small skinny puppy with a floppy ear. Closing his book, Adam had stood up to walk over to her, but she had quickly ran away.
She had came back the next day though and like before, ran away when he had tried to walk towards her.
On the third day, he had taken a biscuit with himself when he went outside and put it on the ground near him, and she had eaten it and looked at him expectedly for more. He had apologized though he knew she couldn't understand him, but the next day, he had sneaked out some of his breakfast for her and she had barked happily. It had continued for some days, Adam sat at his usual place and never got too close so that he wouldn't spook her, but on the eight day, she had slowly approached him and sniffed his hand. At first he had thought she was looking for more snacks, but then she had pressed her snout to his hand and nudged impatiently. It was the first time he had pet a dog and he would always remember her excited bark and the warmth he had felt seeping in his chest.
After that, she came by everyday, and he would give her treats and pet her. He never gave her a name though, he knew he couldn't get attached, because he was scared she would leave soon or his dad would find out and not let Adam see her anymore, and he knew he had to leave one day without her. She was just a stray, she wasn't his pet, no matter how much he loved her.
She had helped him a lot too, on days when he had sat outside the trailer too afraid to go back inside, she would lick his salty cheeks and settle quietly in his lap, a comforting presence. He would talk to her in a low voice and it was helpful. He would tell her about his day, what new thing he learned at school or which book he was reading.
It was the first time he had loved someone so passionately, but he had lost that too.
Since he left the trailer, there had been so many things happening to truly understand her loss, but during silent nights when Ronan didn't come over to St. Agnes, Adam had found himself missing her with a sharp ache in his chest. Some nights, he had tried to give himself hope that maybe some family had taken her in, but he knew no one in the trailer park would take in a stray dog, and he never believed in false hope. Some nights, when he was already feeling miserable, his mind would fill with terrible questions: ‘What if she was getting weaker? What if she had gotten hurt? Or worse?’ Those thoughts had been painful enough to make tears escape and roll down on the pillow. He had known he would lose her one day, but he hadn't expected it to hurt so much.
Like many other things in his life, he made himself move forward with it, and didn’t let himself think about it too much.
That is, until Ronan barged into his apartment and announced that he stole her (well he couldn't technically steal her, but still).
Now he sat besides Ronan in the BMW, leg jittering, and mind running with thoughts. ‘Ronan had done this for him. Even when Adam let himself believe he would never have this. How was he so lucky to have him? And how was she? Would she be okay? Would she even remember him?
Ronan put a grounding hand on his thigh, bringing him out of his thoughts. "Excited?" he asked.
Adam nodded, taking Ronan's hand and interlocking it with his. "Thank you."
Ronan waved it off and soon they reached the barns.
Before they got down, Adam brought a hand to cup the back of Ronan’s neck and leaned their foreheads together. “Seriously though, I…” He didn't know how to articulate how thankful he was. How he never let himself hope that he might meet her again one day. How he still couldn't believe that Ronan remembered her and did this for Adam. How he loved him so much that sometimes it scared him. He kissed him deeply, hoping to convey even half of the emotions he was feeling. “Thank you so much,” he said as they pulled back, knowing it wasn't enough, nothing would be.
“Anything for you,” Ronan said, kissing him again softly. “Come on now, let's see your dog.”
As they made their way inside, Adam’s heart raced with anticipation, and jumped in his throat when he saw her sitting on the couch in the living room, with Opal who was talking to her animatedly.
She turned towards them at their footsteps and as soon as she saw Adam, she started barking excitedly and barreled towards him. Adam kneeled down and let out a surprised “Oof” as she jumped at him, licking his face and wiggling escastically. She was skinnier than he remembered but the brightness in her eyes was still the same. Adam hugged her, grinning widely even as he felt his eyes burning with tears. He had thought he would never see her again.
“Shit, I missed you so much,” he said, voice trembling with the flood of emotions.
He hadn't realised he was crying till Ronan kneeled down besides him and gently stroked a thumb below his eyes. Turning towards him, Adam wrapped his arms around Ronan’s neck tightly, careful of her still sitting on his legs, and buried his face in Ronan’s chest. “I can't believe this. I'm- Fuck- Ro, I love you so much.”
“I love you, too,” Ronan whispered, pressing his lips to his good ear. “And you better not love her more than me.”
Adam let out a wet chuckle that sounded more like a relieved sob. “Of course not.” He wiped his eyes and moved his hands to pet her again and she wagged her tail at getting the attention again. “But you do have competition now.”
Ronan opened his mouth to retort but was interrupted by a “What about me?” by Opal who had gotten up from the couch and walked over to them.
“You know I already love you more than Ronan,” Adam replied cheekily, which made her break into a grin and Ronan to cross his arms.
“Betrayed by my own boyfriend,” he huffed dramatically. Adam’s stomach fluttered at his words; he wondered if he would ever get used to being Ronan Lynch’s boyfriend and being loved so unconditionally by him. He hoped not. “Because of that, you’re putting Opal to sleep tonight,” Ronan told him.
“No lullabies tonight?” Opal asked him. Ronan would sing her irish songs before she slept and she had grown very fond of them. Adam may be a little biased because he was stupidly in love with him, but Ronan's voice really was beautiful. It was easy to get addicted to that.
“No, but you get to hear Adam's stories tonight,” Ronan told her and she cheered happily. She also really adored it when Adam read her stories, Ronan said it's because his voice was really soothing, and okay, maybe they were both biased.
Turning towards the dog still wriggling excitedly in his lap, Adam said, “You wanna hear stories too?” It brought back memories of sitting with her and reading out loud to her, making him feel nostalgic but it also brought back the heaviness that was always accompanied when he thought back to the trailer. But, looking at his family around him, he knew they would make more memories together, and he was really looking forward to that.
“So do you have a name or are we calling her Deathfang?” Ronan asked him.
Stroking her head gently, Adam thought of a person who had been one of the first people who believed in him and showed him kindness. He felt the familiar tightness that came when he thought of her, but it was getting easier. Letting out a breath, he said, “What about Perry?”
He looked up to see a soft smile on Ronan’s lips. “That sounds great.”
Later that night, after stories and a lullaby because Ronan couldn't say no to Opal, they laid in bed with Perry curled up between them, the moonlight peeking in through the window and shining down on them. As Ronan's breathing evened out and Adam assumed he was asleep, he whispered, “You're the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
He felt more than heard Ronan's breath hitch and the other boy’s eyes opened, and before Adam could decipher the numerous emotions in them, Ronan leaned forward and kissed him. It felt like the way Adam had kissed him in the car, like Ronan was saying everything that he couldn't articulate in words.
They pulled back and Ronan pressed his forehead to Adam’s, muttering a hoarse, “You’re going to be the fucking death of me, Adam.”