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Flabbergasted.
That was the only term that Chuuya could think of, that accurately and completely described the state of his feelings and emotions right now. Nakahara Chuuya, was in fact, absolutely flabbergasted.
Speechless.
Let's back up a little bit. For the last fifteen minutes or so, Chuuya has found himself staring at a certain figure in the water. The man looked super tall, even from a distance. He had brown hair that appeared to be really fluffy, and Chuuya couldn't see his eyes but he was willing to bet that they were really pretty too.
Unlike other male beach-goers here, this person opted to wear a one-piece swimsuit that covered his torso completely, along with his legs, down to the knees. His swimsuit had full length sleeves, but Chuuya could very well see bandages peeking out from the edges.
Because Chuuya had legal access to binoculars, naturally, he focussed them on this brunet person. Not because Chuuya was a creepy stalker or anything! There was no way he'd be anything like that. No, see, Chuuya worked as a lifeguard on this very beach. Hence, seated atop the lifeguard tower, his actions of using the binoculars were perfectly normal.
After all, it was a lifeguard's duty to keep an eye on all the people that were at the beach he was supposed to look over. It wasn't all that relevant that he merely chose to keep an eye on certain people a little more than others. Of course, by certain people, he most definitely meant that brunet bandage guy.
He must be a surfer, Chuuya decided.
After all, he did carry a super large surfboard with him as he tread upon the sand lining the water. In fact, didn't it totally make sense now? That bandage guy's dressing sense that is. Most people on the beach definitely wore revealing swimsuits, but he was just completely covered? It made sense if he was a surfer.
But, a shame, really.
Not because Chuuya would be into that or anything! It was uh, just that, he was probably feeling really hot in that outfit. It was peak summer, after all. The sun was scorching. Use sunscreen, everyone. Don't want the skin cancer gods to catch a look of you, do you?
Anyway, because this guy was a surfer, it totally made sense for Chuuya to keep a close watch on him. Weren't surfers more prone to toppling over in the water? What if Chuuya looked away for one second, and an extra large wave struck the beach, and took away the cute surfer with it? That would truly be a tragedy.
Sure, there were other surfers on the water today. And sure, there were other families playing on the beach. But see, Chuuya just very fortunately happened to have co-workers. That's right. Other lifeguards existed! They were perfectly capable of keeping an eye on everyone else on the beach. It was just Chuuya who suddenly had the very urgent need to keep his eyes glued to a certain brunet, bandaged surfer at all times.
Not that it was too sudden or anything.
Ever since summer started properly about three weeks ago, cute brunet guy has been coming to the beach practically every day. He didn't bring his surfboard very often, but he came either ways everyday. And he was alone every time.
But that wasn't as important as the fact that Chuuya had managed to make eye contact with that guy for at least seven times now! Naturally, he'd had the strong urge to squeal then and there, which he'd suppressed till the cute guy finally turned away and stopped looking at him. Once that beanpole's eyes were averted, Chuuya definitely ducked down and squealed a little, attracting friendly bullying from his co-workers every time.
That aside, the bandaged guy even waved to Chuuya a few times. And it was almost always right before he tried his hand at surfing. As expected, Chuuya's heart did funny things every time. It was very unappreciated, damn it! There was no reason for his heart to jump around in his chest, just because a certain bandaged fucker merely waved at him.
But the fact remained that the cute surfer guy waved very cutely! Squeals, Chuuya was actually in love. Even if he didn't exactly know what that guy's name was. He has just been referring to him as 'cute bandaged surfer guy' in his head all time anyway.
Still, for someone who Chuuya called a surfer in his head all the time, he hasn't really seen that guy surf all that often. Usually, whenever he did bring his surfboard with him, he'd just stay in shallow waters, doing nothing but lounging about and actually speaking to a few women.
Chuuya was a little disappointed at that, but it was insanely hilarious when some of the women smacked him before angrily stomping away. Whenever this happened, the cute surfer guy always looked over at Chuuya and pouted, as if he knew that the lifeguard had been watching the scene unfold before him.
Because Chuuya was super cool, he always merely smirked and laughed at the cute surfer, before pointedly turning away. Just so he could squeal internally without being obvious, but cute surfer didn't have to know that!
It was considering all this, that Chuuya was so genuinely shocked to his core today.
See, today, that bandaged guy actually went deeper into the water, as if he was seriously trying to surf today. Chuuya was quick to notice that he wasn't alone today. Well, not entirely, that is. There was a group of surfers dressed like him nearby. They didn't interact with cute surfer guy much, but they very often paused their conversations to look at him, as if assessing his surfing attempts.
Attempts was exactly the word for it. That guy kept wading towards the higher waves, and trying to climb upon his surfboard; but he failed every single time. No, seriously. He'd try to stand up straight on the surfboard, but he always fell right over, plunging into the water, choking and grasping at air for a few seconds before realising that the water wasn't all that deep, and standing upon the sand once again.
Hence why Chuuya was just staring at him, completely flabbergasted.
Hell, Chuuya was sure that he could surf better than cue surfer guy. Even if he has never learnt surfing. What the fuck? But anyway, it was endearing, at least. The bandaged guy looked so completely exasperated every time he fell into the water, as if he was about to start whining and throwing a tantrum any moment now.
Chuuya had a feeling that he was in love with a very annoying guy.
But well anyway, he was still fondly staring at the miserably-failing-to-surf surfer, when his two co-workers sneaked up behind him. One of them nudged him suggestively, "His name is Dazai."
Chuuya wasn't all that startled when he turned to face her, "Yosano-san. What are you talking about?"
Yosano, who happened to be the paramedic lifeguard, nodded towards the bandaged surfer guy, "That guy. The one you have been crushing on."
The other co-worker, named Gin, nodded this time, "Yeah, him. His name is Dazai."
Chuuya gaped at them for about three seconds, "Okay, I don't have a crush on him."
Gin sighed dramatically, "Please say that after you've seen the super gross expression you make when you look at him."
Chuuya shook his head, a smirk hinting at his face, "That's not what I meant. I don't have a crush on him, because I'm quite positive that I'm in love with that guy."
Yosano wrinkled her nose at once, "Eww! Gay people! So gross!"
Chuuya rolled his eyes, "Shut the fuck up, you bisexual bitch. You're the one who flirts with literally anything that breathes."
Yosano gasped in offense, "How rude, Chuuya-kun! I do not! Gin, tell him I don't."
Gin laughed, "Didn't you just flirt with that white-haired surfer kid to get Dazai's name for Chuuya-san?"
That got Chuuya's attention real fast, "Wait, yeah. How did you find out his name anyway?"
Gin pointed over at the group of surfers that Chuuya had noticed before, "Yosano talked to them. Turns out Dazai is with them; they're a surfing team. Like a real one."
Chuuya turned to face Yosano, "You bully me so much, but don't you just looove me? I can't believe you actually went to talk to them."
Yosano raised both her hands to flip him off exclusively, "Shut the fuck up. I'm just sick of watching you pine over him. Go talk to him already, pussy."
Before Chuuya could say anything, however, Gin tapped at his shoulder urgently, "You need to go. I think he's drowning."
Naturally, Chuuya whipped around to look at the water, "What? Who's drowning?"
That's when his eyes fell upon the brunet surfer boy that he adored so much. The one who was apparently named Dazai. Sure enough, he was drowning. The sea had taken him too far in, or maybe it was him ho had waded in a little too deep, in his attempts at catching a wave. But either way, he was quite far from the beach, and certainly appeared to be drowning.
For a fraction of a second, all Chuuya could hear was white noise. He felt a sliver of intense panic for a brief second, before his adrenaline and extensive lifeguard training kicked in. He was a trained professional after all.
Within seconds, he had leaped over the lifeguard tower and onto the ground, taking off his tank top as he ran towards the water head-on. It didn't take very long till he was already swimming towards where Dazai seemed to be fumbling, trying his best to hold on to his surfboard to remain afloat.
But he could only hold out for that long. From the corner of his eye, while continuing to swim frantically, Chuuya caught a glimpse of Dazai's head going underwater, his hands dropping down from the surfboard.
Fortunately for the both of them, Chuuya reached him within a second, diving underwater, his hands finding bandaged ones as he pulled the brunet up and put him over the surfboard. Dazai was still conscious, fortunately, coughing as he struggled to get the water out of his windpipe.
After ensuring that they were safe for now, Chuuya rubbed his back, "Take it easy, shitty Dazai. God, you're unbelievable."
As Chuuya pushed the surfboard, with a mackerel sprawled all over it, back towards the beach, Dazai offered him a small smile, "Are you trying to be my little mermaid, little chibi?"
Finally reaching the beach, Chuuya snorted, "Please save that bullshit for later."
As expected, Gin and Yosano were already waiting for them on the beach, armed with first aid kits and towels. Gin wrapped a big, fluffy towel around the surfer immediately, while Yosano immediately got to checking his vitals, making sure that he wasn't going to choke and die right in front of their eyes.
After a few seconds, she nodded at the duo, "I think he's fine. He probably drank too much saltwater, but that's not gonna cause any harm."
Gin handed him a bottle of drinking water, "Drink some regular water, just in case."
Dazai looked at all three of the lifeguards in amusement, but he obliged anyway. Drinking the water, pulling the towel a little tighter, and most importantly, leaning into the redhead lifeguard's touch, resting against him completely.
Yosano apparently noticed that all too quickly, because she just rolled her eyes and smirked, "We're gonna leave you guys to it then."
As the two of them walked away, Gin took the opportunity to offer one last piece of advice, "Chuuya-san, don't make a move too fast! Don't want him to die, do you?"
Ignoring his co-workers expertly, and waiting till they had left, Chuuya turned to the surfer, "Are you okay, shitty Dazai?"
The brunet smiled, eyes twinkling, "I'm fine! But how do you know my name?"
Chuuya waved his hands in dismissal, "Yosano, that's the paramedic lifeguard, asked your surf team over there. More importantly, how the fuck did you almost drown?!"
Dazai pouted immediately, "I was just trying to catch a big wave!"
Chuuya sighed in exasperation, "Why didn't you just swim back to the surface when you noticed you were to far out?! Do they not teach you this shit in your surf team!"
Dazai gaped at him for a few seconds, before innocently declaring, "They did say that. But you see, little chibi, I can't swim!"
Chuuya scowled at him at once, "Stop calling me a little chibi! Wait. Did you just say you can't fucking swim?! You're a surfer, but you can't swim?!"
The brunet pressed a finger to his lips secretively, "My team doesn't know that. Don't tell them, okay?"
The lifeguard frowned, "Dazai, that is so dangerous. I definitely have to tell your team about-"
Dazai threw his arms around the other at once, "Chuuya, you can't!"
The other narrowed his eyes immediately, "How do you know my name?"
The surfer cocked his head, as if he was really so innocent, "Oh that? I asked the person named Gin-chan! Quite a while ago, actually. Right after I first saw you three weeks ago, actually. You were just too cute to not ask about."
Chuuya muttered, "I'm going to fucking kill her. And seriously, Gin-chan?!"
Dazai grinned, "Don't be so jealous, Chuuya! I only have eyes for you, after all. My cute little mermaid saviour!"
Chuuya growled, "Who the fuck is your mermaid! Fuck you! You're just a shitty bastard. I should've known, damn it. I like one person in my whole life, and he turns out to be a shitty pet fish. One who can't even swim!"
Dazai beamed positively, "Ehhh, so Chuuya likes me too, ne? Doesn't that exclusively make you my cute little mermaid?"
The lifeguard deadpanned, "It literally does not. There is no such thing, shitty bastard."
The surfer huffed, "But you said you like me!"
Shamelessly, the redhead corrected him, "Nope. I'm in love with you. There's a difference."
The other clapped his hands in glee, "That's even better! Doesn't that mean you're my boyfriend now? And by extension, my personal swimming trainer?"
Chuuya's jaw dropped rather comedically, "Your boyfriend?! At least ask me out properly!"
"Fine! Nakahara Chuuya-kun, won't you pretty please be my boyfriend?"
Chuuya couldn't help but laugh this time. Reaching his hands up to pinch his crush's cheeks, he spoke, "Take me on a date today for a whole day and ask me tomorrow. I'll say yes."
Dazai stared at him suspiciously, "Is that a promise?"
Chuuya grinned, before poking him in the cheek, "It is."
Dazai sighed, "Fine then. I guess I can take my mermaid out on a date. Would you like to go to the aquarium, Ariel-chan?"
Chuuya snorted, "Why must you do those disgusting names, shitty Dazai. But yeah, I guess the aquarium sounds nice."
"In that case, would you prefer Chuuya-chan?"
"The fuck?! Hell no! Just Chuuya is fine."
Dazai nodded sagely, "I see. Very good to know, Chuuya-chan."
Disregarding serious trauma like almost being drowned, Chuuya smacked his partner in the arm, "Shut the fuck you, bastard. Don't call me that. I'll kill you, I swear."
Dazai shook his head, "You see, I'm always open to the concept of being killed. But I think I'll stick around just a little longer."
The lifeguard frowned, "Hey. Don't say things like that. It's not funny."
For a change, Dazai looked genuinely taken aback. As if he'd never been told that suicide jokes weren't funny. As if nobody had cared enough to do so. Chuuya came to the realisation quick enough, and honestly, it didn't feel very good. Dazai was so cute, after all. He deserved to be cared for, ne?
Chuuya leaned forward to press a kiss to the other's lips, "You taste like salt."
Dazai choked out a laugh, clearly ignoring all the heavy stuff for now, "Gee, I wonder why."
Chuuya just rolled his eyes, "Go home, shitty Dazai. Take a shower and rest up. You don't want to feel like shit for our date, do you?"
A decision had been made by the lifeguard, see. He might have liked, and even fallen in love with this shitty bastard without knowing much about him. But he was positive that he was totally, completely, head-over-heels in love with this bastard. Chuuya was going to care for him forever, damn it!
Dazai pulled him out of his thoughts with a pat to his head, "Alright, alright. I'll go now. You already have my number. Text me, okay, little mermaid?"
Now, Chuuya would scream about being called a little mermaid once again. He really would, but he was a little occupied with actually checking his phone to see if he really had that bastard's number. Sure enough, he did.
How the fuck was that even possible?!
Chuuya glared at the cute surfer guy, "Oi, Dazai! When the fuck did you put your number in my phone, damn it?!"
As expected, Dazai completely ignored the question, instead choosing to just wave at him, "Don't forget I love you so much, Chuuya!"
And with that, he disappeared behind one of the many shacks at the beach, leaving Chuuya dumbfounded behind him. As he still continued to just sit there and gape at his phone, once again, one of his co-workers crept up behind him.
Gin nudged him, "I take it that you two got your shit together?"
Chuuya stared up at her, "I think so? I have his number apparently?! How long have I had it, the fuck? And you! Gin-chan. You've spoken to him before?"
Gin shrugged, a smile hinting on her face, "He asked me about you the very first day we saw him. And he gave me his number too, asking me to put it in your phone if I could. So, I did exactly that."
Chuuya gaped at her, "I've had his number for three fucking weeks?!"
Gin nodded proudly, "It's even saved as 'Dazai Osamu' in your phone."
Chuuya sighed deeply, "I hate you. I actually hate you."
Gin just laughed some more, "No you don't. Anyway, congrats, I guess. You finally got your guy. I'm gonna go talk shit about you and Dazai with Yosano."
That was all she said before walking away. Chuuya knew her well enough to know that she would most definitely be going to find Yosano, just for the purpose for talking shit about him and his new boyfriend. Boyfriend. Or well, something like that, at the very least.
Chuuya was just going to settle on referring to that shitty guy as his boyfriend.
It was much cuter than calling him 'cute surfer guy' anyway.
-
headcanon omakes
Eventually, Chuuya has Dazai saved in his phone as 'Shitty Boyfriend.'
Dazai, on the other hand, has Chuuya saved as 'my chibi mermaid', just for the sake of pissing him off, of course.
And as expected, Chuuya did end up giving Dazai a bunch of swimming lessons. He didn't want his newly found boyfriend to actually drown and die anytime soon, right?
At the aquarium date, Chuuya most definitely spotted a mackerel fish and pointed to it, insisting that it was definitely named Dazai.
Dazai's favourite part of the aquarium was the dolphin petting zoo. He got Chuuya a dolphin pendant, which he wears all the time, and Yosano and Gin bully him for it.