One

The Moira Rose Lil Theatre (formerly Elmdale Playhouse) was putting on Rocky Horror. That was like, the greatest thing ever.  David can't wait to see Patrick in his costume.  David can't wait to get Patrick out of his costume.  But when your husband is off at rehearsals, it doesn't give you a lot to do on Sundays.  Marcy had taught him how to crochet that past Thanksgiving.  Though he wasn’t really good at it, it was a way to pass the time.  So David put up a flier in the store for a stitch and bitch. 

That Sunday he stared at the tangled mess that was supposed to be a hat for Patrick before the bell at the top of the door rang. 

David looked up, and was a little shocked when Mutt walked in the door. 

“Mutt! Hi! Did we have a shipment come in today?” 

Mutt shook his head and nodded to the flier. 

“Oh, right.  Would you like to join me?” David patted the seat beside him on the little loveseat that he moved for just this occasion, and Mut sat down with an RA bag full of yarn. 

“What?” Mutt nodded to David’s project. 

David had learned in his many years, that Mutt was a man of few words. “It’s supposed to be a hat for Patrick.  Right now it looks like a tangled mess.” 

“May I?” Mutt offered open hands but did not press more. 

“Please?  I didn’t know you knew how to crochet.” 

“Mom taught me.” Mutt smiled and untangled the yarny mess with ease. 

“Jocelyn, is she helping with the play?” David guessed. 

Mutt nodded. “Patrick?” 

“Dr. Frank N. Furter, baby!” 

Mutt blushed. “Jake is Rocky!” 

David smiled wide and worked his rings. “Is he? Well good for him! Good for you!”

Mutt handed back the untangled yarn. “Just take your time.  Relax a little, and count your stitches.” 

David took a deep breath and attempted another chain. “What about you? What are you working on?” 

Mutt held up a pair of knitting needles with some aqua yarn. “Just a scarf.” 

“Mutt! You knit too? My aren't you talented? You know your cutting boards are such a big seller, that’s why I thought you had a shipment for me today!” 

Mutt blushed a little. “Tomorrow?”

“I can come to the woodshop tomorrow and pick them up. Will that work for you?” 

“I can show you some of the pizza boards I’ve been working on?” Mutt offered. 

“That would be great! Hey, how does this look?” David showed off his chain. 

“Looks great.  I work in this bump.  See here? It will leave a better look even at the end.  You try?” 

David slowly pulled his hook through, making several single crochets, and then showing them off. “I’m doing it!” he exclaimed. 

“You are.  Hey, David?” 

David looked up. “Yeah?” 

“How did you know?” Mutt asked. 

“Need a little bit more information here, Mutt.” David laughed nervously. 

“That um…Patrick was more…than a business partner?” 

David beamed. He loved telling this story. “Well, he invited me for a birthday dinner, and it took me a while even then, but then I realized it was a date.  I kissed Patrick, and we’ve been happy together ever since.” David looked at his row of single crochets. “This doesn’t look bad, does it?” 

“You’re doing great.  Now just count your stitches, turn, and go the other way.” 

“Do you ask…because of Jake? You guys have been in business what, a few months now?” 

“Since I got back.  It’s just that Jake….” 

“Is the town alley cat?” David supplied. “Look! I’m doing it.” David presented another neat row of single crochets. 

Mutt laughed and nodded. 

“You know, there’s a feral cat that lives near the cottage.  We call her midnight. We leave food out for her, and she comes around when she wants to. Patrick even built her a lil house in the back, where she can sleep, in case there’s a storm or something.  She’s always been very sweet to me, but also very wild.  She even brings me dead lizards now.  Apparently, in cat language, that’s ‘thank you.”

Mutt beamed back at David. “Thank you.” 

David tilted his head. “For what? You are the one who taught me how to crochet!” 

Two

The 2nd week of David’s Stitch and Bitch, Stevie was the 2nd to arrive, after Mutt. “You’re home!” David got up and made the short trip to capture Stevie in his arms. She smelled like sweat and stale air. “Ew. You stink.” David scrunched his nose, and Stevie gave him a playful shove away. 

“Good to see you too.  I’ll take a shower but I wanted to see you first.” 

David beamed. “Join us?” David sat on the loveseat and patted the seat next to him. 

Stevie nodded to Mutt and sat crisscross on the couch. “Hey.” 

Mutt smiled. “Crochet?” 

“Marcy, Patrick’s mom taught us.  I’d like to learn knitting too.  I spend a lot of time traveling. Plenty of free time.” 

“David?” Mutt asked. 

“Sure, why not?” David shrugged. 

That’s how, in an hour, Stevie had a lil scarf on her lap, where David was still trying to get the hang of the knit stitch. “How are you so good at this?” 

Stevie shrugged. “It’s been a long time, but Maureen taught me when I was young.” 

David squeezed Stevie’s knee. “I’m sure she would be very proud.” 

Stevie slightly blushed and then turned to Mutt. “Whatcha working on anyway?” 

“Scarf. For Jake.” 

Stevie turned white. “Fuck.  We’re supposed to meet at the Wobbly Elm tonight.  Is that alright?” 

Mutt flushed a little but nodded his head. “Of course it is alright.  Jake is a free agent.” 

“Come with me?” Stevie’s eyes sparkled. 

“To the Wobbly Elm?” Mutt looked up. 

Stevie nodded. 

“Can I think about it?” Mutt asked and then got up. 

“Don’t think too long.” Stevie winked. 

Mutt waved goodbye.  

David nudged Stevie. “What’s that all about?” 

“Just a bit of fun.  Hey, where’s my better half?” Stevie deflected, asking for Patrick.  

David narrowed his eyes. “Somethings going on.  Who have you met?” 

Stevie blinked. “I can’t fathom what you mean.  Tell me what’s happening with you?” 

“You are setting up Jake with Mutt, right? That means you have to have someone.” David pressed. 

“How do you know?” Stevie asked, offended. 

David smiled. “That’s what I would do.  Who is it? Someone from New York.  I have spies there, you know?” 

Stevie rolled her eyes. “You have one spy there, and before you ask it is not Alexis.  She is ridiculously happy with Ted, ew!” 

David pouted. “Why won’t you tell me?” 

Stevie huffed. “Because there’s nothing to tell. It’s just a stupid crush.  I’m not sure I can do long distance.” 

David frowned and squeezed Stevie’s knee. “You should tell them, especially if you are willing to give up Jake…” 

Stevie rolled her eyes. “I’m not ‘giving Jake up.’ I’m just making sure he has someone who takes care of him.  Mutt is a good guy.” 

“Matchmaker Stevie Budd.  You know you are a catch, right? And sometimes, it’s worth it to take the risk.” David smiled.  “Tell me their name, please? Let me run a background check. This is New York we’re talking about.” 

“Her name…is Ruth….” 

Three

It’s the third week of knitting club when Mutt and Ivan come in. Mutt takes his usual seat on the extra chair and smiles softly at David. “Stevie?” he asks, motioning to the empty spot on the loveseat next to David. “She went to help with the play.  She’s only home for a few more days. She taught me a new crochet…I’m going to say pattern.” David holds up scarf 2.0 “I hope it’s okay?” 

Mutt just smiles at him. “Of course it is David. It looks great. Do you think…would it be weird if I left Stevie a ‘thank you’ cutting board?” 

David nodded. “I think she’ll love that!” David turned to Ivan. “Nice to see you, Ivan.  What are you…What are you working on?” 

“Hats for the babies.” Ivan held up a ridiculously small hat. “I try octopus too, but legs…” Ivan trailed off with a shrug. 

“Can I help?” Mutt bit his lip and nodded towards Ivan’s project. 

“Mutt, let’s switch? I would like to learn too.” Mutt got up, and David and Mutt traded seats, and Ivan hesitantly sat down on the loveseat. 

“Body easy.  Just circle and then decrease.  Legs harder!” 

Mutt made a quick chain. “Just try let’s say 3 single crochet in every chain? Let’s see if it curls?” Mutt demonstrated. 

“I don’t think I know how to make a circle. Wait, don’t you need a circle for hats, Mutt?” 

Mutt shook his head. “Not necessarily.  You can make…like a fat scarf and gather it at one end.  I’ll show you, I promise.” 

“You can make amigurumi too with a circle. So many things.  Start with 6 stitches in one stitch.”  Ivan explained

“Three is a kind of magic in crochet,” Mutt added shyly and showed Ivan his sample octopus leg. 

“Thank you, Mutt.  Now only 7 more!” Ivan laughed. 

“I did it!” David triumphantly held up his circle. 

“Now you put two stitches in every stitch until you have 12 stitches.”  Ivan guided. 

“What got you into making octopus and hats for babies?” David wondered out loud. 

Ivan shrugged. “Something to do? I make cinnamon rolls for cafe and motel, but nights still get lonely.” 

Mutt and David both bit their lips. “What happened to your dream of a bakery?” Mutt asked gently. 

“Bob wanted to invest.  But with him and Gwen…..”

“It didn’t work out?” David guessed. “You should ask Gwen.” David teased. “You should ask Patrick! Patrick helped me start up RA!” 

“I could ask Jake.” Mutt offered. “We are business partners, and we have like zero debt.” 

Ivan smiled at Mutt. “Thank you Mutt. You good kid.  Jake and I…how do you say have had whiskey, okay?” 

Mutt flushed just a bit. “Jake’s an alley cat.  That doesn’t surprise me.” 

David raised his new slightly bigger circle. “I’m doing it! Wait! What? What did I miss?” 

Ivan just smiled at both of them. “Back in Bosnia, I was a dancer. Many dancer are queer. I came to Canada, and I escaped.  I work the quarry.  I am happy.  Just a little lonely.” 

David tilted his head and frowned. “What happened between you and Twyla?” 

“We are good friends. She wants me to make muffins for the cafe but I need help in the kitchen in the morning. It’s hard to balance.” Ivan took the circle. “Now you put one stitch in the next stitch, and two stitches in the next stitch, you do that until you have 18 stitches.” 

“You need a business partner.  Feel free to put a flier up at RA.  Ivan, have you thought about asking Ray? He has all these businesses.  What would be one more?” David pondered, thinking back to how close the two were sitting at the last open mic night. 

Ivan shook his head. “I couldn’t.  Every time I try to, I forget my English.  He’s just so kind, sweet, and so handsome!” Ivan covered his mouth with his hand. 

“Ivan…” Mutt gave a very small smile, and David beamed. “Why not just invite him to stitch and bitch next week? Mutt and I can act as a buffer!” 

“We could?” Mutt asked and then nodded when David nodded. “We could.” 

“I’ll ask.” Ivan nodded

Four

Ronnie appeared with Ray the next week.  David smiled at them both before Ronnie pulled him to sit in a chair, instead of his preferred seat on the couch. “Are you playing matchmaker now?” Ronnie’s voice is almost playful, still somewhat droll, somewhat Ronnie, but she has a small smile for him. 

David would rather stay on Ronnie’s good side.  They have a kitchen to renovate. “Is Ray remotely interested? Ronnie, you’re his best friend, right?” 

“David, I have known Ray for 20 years, and I have not known him to date.  A few times over the years, sure. But he’s mostly been interested in his businesses…” 

As the two talk, Ivan walks in. 

Ray beamed. “Ivan! I didn’t realize you knitted!” 

“Crochet…mostly.” Ivan smiled and moved his hand to offer Ray a seat.

The two men awkwardly sat on the loveseat. “My mother had so much yarn. I just thought…you know it would be better put to use.  Though I have no idea how.” 

Ivan looked at David and Ronnie, and they both nodded. “I make hats, and octopus for the  N-I-C-U.” 

“Oh, Ivan, that’s kind.  Could you teach me?” 

Ronnie got up, possibly to leave, but Mutt smiled up at Ronnie. “You too, Ronnie.” 

Ronnie rolled her eyes. “Hand me some yarn and needles.” 

“Hook.” David gently corrected and handed over the supplies. 

Finally, everyone filed out except for Ivan. 

“David, Thank you.” Ivan beamed. 

“Anything or the greatest Elms hottest new bakery.  Um…Ivan?” 

“Yes, David?” 

“If you want a bakery, you should just you know tell people.  If you want Ray’s help in Real Estate, I’m sure he’s all in….When Patrick and I got together, there was just a lot of miscommunication…”

Ivan smiled. “I get what you are saying.  Thank you, David.” 

 Five

The fifth week of Stitch and bitch, Ollie arrived first.  She ran the flower shop in Elm Glenn and was part of the greater Elm County Small Business Association. “Olivia! It’s been too long!” David patted the place beside him, first come first serve, right? 

“I’m going by Ollie now.  Is that okay?” 

David took it in stride. “Of course! I use he/they pronouns. This is somewhat kismet. Can I talk to you about the opening night of Rocky Horror?” 

“Of course David you know you guys are one of my favorite vendors.  Let me get my tablet?” 

Ollie went to get her tablet and in walked Ronnie. 

“David, I don’t know how you did it.  I don’t know how you did it?” 

David shrugged. “I have no idea what you mean.  My knitting is coming along at a sloth’s pace.  But look, I’ve made an octopus! Well working on an octopus.” 

Ronnie got a bag out and handed David what seemed to be a reversible octopus. “These things are addictive.  I never thought I would be the type of girl to make something soft, but these things are kind of fun.  They don’t take much time either.” 

In again walked Ollie.  “Ronnie! I didn’t know you knitted!” 

Ronnie looked Ollie up and down. “I didn’t know you knitted either.  You are sure looking fine today!” 

Ollie sat down next to Ronnie. “I heard this was the place to learn crochet.  Always love to learn new crafts.  Helps keep the mind sharp!” 

Ronnie nodded along. “Is that right? Well, you’ve come to the right place.  David can teach you, can’t you David?”

“I have no qualifications for teaching anyone.  You do it, Ronnie?” David smiled his best customer smile.  “I’d like to check on something.” 

David got up to make a call.  Normally, Mutt didn’t cross his mind.  But Mutt had been at every stitch and bitch, so far.  He called the only number that he had. 

“Jutt Woodworking, Jake speaking.” 

“Jake, hey, sorry for the call, um, have you spoken to Mutt today?” 

“Tiger, hey.  Wait, isn’t Mutt with you? He told me that he was enjoying your knitting circle.” 

David rolled his eyes. “Please don’t call me that.  Yeah, I’ve enjoyed having him too. It’s just he’s usually here, and he’s not here, and this is the only number I had for him.  So I wanted to make sure he was okay.” 

“I can go check on him,” Jake said easily.  “I’m barely needed in the play anyway.” 

“Oh, fuck!  I forgot you were in the play.  Could you? It’s just I have stitchers here.” David took a look at Ronnie and Ollie and knew it was just a very lame ass excuse. 

“No worries.  David, do you want me to stop calling you ‘tiger?” Jake asked just as easily. 

“No, not really but like you would have to get Patrick on board for all of that…” David stammered. 

“Got it, loud and clear.” Jake hung up the phone, and David turned to Ronnie and Ollie. 

He set up an order for Ollie for all the cast members of Rocky Horror; one for Stevie for when she came home for the season; one for Ivan, one for Ray, and one for Mutt, just in case. 

Plus One

Ruth was the first one on her feet at the end of Rocky Horror.  She wore a Rocky Horror shirt and a pair of bell-bottom pants.  She reminded David of all the good things about New York: multicultural people, loud and proud, and obnoxious, but like in a good way. Ruth whisted when Stevie came on stage, even though she was just part of the Ensemble, and David found his feet. “That’s my friend!” he called over the roar.  

Then Patrick took center stage, and everything else just blurred away.  Patrick bowed and looked straight at him.  David blew as many kisses as he could.  When Stevie handed him the bouquet of Roses, he felt fucking proud because those were the Roses he ordered.  Patrick smiled and blew his kiss to David, and because David was a sentimental fool he caught it. 

Jake walked out on the stage to take his bow.  He was all gold and beardless, he looked fucking good.  On the other side of him, Mutt struggled up.  He had broken his foot last month, which sucked, for sure.  But at least it wasn’t life-threatening. At least now Mutt could go back to Stitch and Bitch. Mutt could finally teach him how to do a treble crochet, whatever that was. 

Couples filed out of the theater, and David felt so proud.  There was Ronnie and Ollie with their green carnations on.  Jake who was acting as a crutch for Mutt.  Stevie and Ruth gushing over each other’s outfits. Ivan and Ray, who excited shoulder to shoulder with their commentary about the play.  Evan Alexis and Ted were in attendance! So Okay, maybe he had very little to do with his sister being here, but that’s not how he would spin it. 

Then there was his husband.  His brave, sexy, killer-voice husband did the time warp like he was made for it. 

“Hey!” Patrick called.  He still had a wig cap on, all his makeup, and then that ridiculous green scrub dress…thing. 

“Dr. Dr. I need your care.  Fuck.  I was hoping I would catch you with your lil costume on.” 

Patrick flushed.  It amazed David after everything, that he could still turn his husband that shade of red.  I mean, Patrick had just performed for the greater Elm County in fishnets! 

“Thanks for the flowers, David.” Patrick pulled David down for a proper kiss and got lipstick all over him.

“Ollie gave me a killer deal.  I helped her get together with Ronnie, you know?” 

Patrick chuckled and squeezed David’s waist. “Someone has been busy!” 

David perked up. “Oh, that reminds me! Let’s stop by RA before we head home!” 

They walked back to RA hand in hand.  David let them both in and rummaged through his ball of mostly started projects. “I made this for you!” 

David handed Patrick the little octopus that he had spent weeks on. 

“Oh, David! Thank you! What is it?”  Patrick winced as soon as the words flew out of his mouth. 

“Um! Rude! Anyone can see, it’s a lil octopus! For that, no Dr. play tonight!” he scolded and tugged the octopus back, and held it close to him.  David petted the octopus and felt that familiar bristle of anxiety, like this lil guy he had worked so hard on, wasn’t good enough. 

“David, David, I’m sorry.  Of course, it’s an octopus, I just meant what is its purpose?” 

David shrugged. “Sometimes, things don’t have a purpose, and that’s okay? Like what is the purpose of Rocky Horror really? It just exists to make people happy.  Making it made me happy because I had friends who came to RA to spend some of their Sundays just to make things with me.  Maybe it’s stupid, maybe it’s cheesy, but I think happiness spreads. I’ve seen it spread. So its purpose is nothing, and everything I think.” 

Patrick whistled low and that action always made David shiver. “Philosopher David Rose.” Patrick gently took the octopus and held it tight. “In that case, I will treasure it always.” 

David pursed out his lip. “I’m still mad at you.” 

Patrick batted his mascara-covered eyelashes. “Let me make it up to you, baby? I still have my corset and my fishnets underneath this dress.  I was hoping you could give me a real pearl necklace.” 

David raised his eyebrows to the heavens. “Really? Well um…we’ll see.  We’ll discuss your punishment at home!