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They were only friends.
Friends that made meals together, laughing in the kitchen as if them being in each other’s presence was the most natural thing in the world.
“Baking soda, Martyn. Not baking powder!” Scott emphasized the name difference between the two types of baking ingredients as if in annoyance, but Martyn could pick up on the hints of fondness present in his tone. “They do very different things! If you mix them up, it’s going to be all ruined. It’s almost as bad as mixing up salt and sugar, though that would be catastrophically unfortunate.”
“I’ll tell you what, Scott,” Martyn started as he picked up a nearby rag to wipe off his hands. His motions and the way he spoke were dramatic and over-exaggerated like they usually were when he was simply messing around. He threw down the rag and stomped away, resisting the urge to glance over his shoulder. “You can do all the baking you promised Lizzie you would do by yourself, mate. I’ll just go kick up my feet and maybe snooze for a few hours. Here I thought you needed me, but, eh, guess not.”
“Martyn, wait,” Scott called him back, reaching out toward him. His hand ended up resting on Martyn’s shoulder, only giving enough pressure to guide Martyn to turn around and face him.
Martyn let Scott move him, raising an eyebrow. “Waiting.”
“Please, help me.” Scott gave him a pout, and Martyn wasn’t sure if he was over-exaggerating or if he was always that adorable with everyone. “I’m way too over my head with all of this baking. I can barely concentrate; I’ve been doing it for so long. Having you here makes it more fun.”
Martyn blinked at him, unfolding his arms and letting them dangle by his sides. He hadn’t expected Scott to respond so… desperately? Perhaps he was more stressed about all the baking than he initially thought. After taking a moment to process, Martyn flashed him a grin and ruffled Scott’s curly blue hair, who promptly squealed a “hey!” as he pulled away. “Don’t worry, I gotchu. What kind of friend would I be if I let you drown in batter and frosting?”
Scott returned the grin, his shoulders visibly relaxing. “You’re the best.”
Martyn chuckled, not fully sure why. It could have been because of the praise or because of the fact Scott didn’t reprimand him further for messing with his hair when his hands were all flour-y. “I know.”
They were only friends.
Friends that spent many evenings curled up on the couch, cuddling close as they watched something on their living room’s TV or chatted about how their day went.
“Who was even in charge of the wardrobe department?” Scott wrinkled his nose at the screen as they watched a film. “They did those poor actors so wrong.”
Martyn and Scott were curled up together on the couch, Martyn’s arm around Scott’s shoulders as Scott leaned against him. Martyn wasn’t sure what the film was called, but it was some new drama he’s seen advertised around that recently came out to streaming services.
“The acting’s good, at least.” Martyn hummed, too entertained by the drama of everything to care much about the outfits. He’s never been one for fashion, but Scott was the reason he dressed somewhat presentable on a near daily basis. It’s gotten to the point Martyn wasn’t sure how he was allowed to leave the house before when looking back on old photos.
“True, but I’ve always liked Ariana Griande.” Scott name dropped the actress that played the main character of the film. “She’s been in a ton of things– she is, like, one of the few childhood actors that went on to be successful as an adult– and she made for a good celebrity crush to tell people when I was still going stealth.”
Martyn opened his mouth to respond to Scott when something in the film pulled his attention away from their idle conversation. “Oh my word-”
They were only friends.
Friends so intimate and so blissfully normal that left Martyn only wanting more, needing more.
“I’ve never actually kissed anyone before.” The confession came suddenly, weak and breathy.
Martyn hadn’t seen it coming in more ways than one. He and Scott had painted each others’ nails (Martyn has gotten fairly good at it over the years by practicing on Scott’s dominant hand), played several card games, left fleeting touches on each others’ skin that surely weren’t typical of regular friends, and were now trying to memorize lines for the play the local theater was putting on. Martyn had convinced Scott to join him (not that it was that hard) and Scott promised to try. They both landed roles, so line memorization was necessary.
“What?” Martyn asked dumbly, gaze flicking up from the words on the paper to Scott’s face.
“Nothin’. Don’t worry about it.” Scott kept his focus on his script, squinting his eyes and biting his lower lip.
“Scott, it’s not nothing if you’re mentioning it.” Martyn frowned, setting the script aside and rearranging his limbs to properly sit up. “What do you mean you’ve never kissed anyone?”
“I just, mm,” Scott tried to start, but the proper words didn’t come to him fast enough. He groaned, rubbing at his face in an attempt to hide his embarrassment. “I was raised religious, remember?”
“Yeah, so was I.” Martyn nodded slowly, not sure what that had to do with anything. One of the things they bonded over was their religious trauma, even if their born-into religions were not associated with each other whatsoever.
“Yours was more of a cult than a religion.” Scott didn’t dwell on the comment, for he’s said it a multitude of times. Martyn didn’t think of Evo as a cult, but he also didn’t try to think of his life from then on. Granted, he did have to
escape
from Evo in order to leave, so maybe it was one. Martyn tossed those thoughts into a figurative box to probably not be examined again later. “But, uh, PDA wasn’t allowed. More than not allowed. It was very strict, lots of things about purity. Divorce wasn’t allowed and, without marriage blessed by the gods, we were led to believe that each touch and kiss would slowly eat away at a soul, and, once a soul was tainted or even destroyed…”
He trailed off his words, tears pooling in his eyes. A single tear started to make its way down Scott’s cheek, but Martyn cupped Scott’s face and used his thumb to wipe it away. “And your role in the play requires you to stage kiss someone, and that scares you, yeah?”
“Yeah,” Scott admitted so quietly that Martyn could barely hear it. He leaned into Martyn’s touch, closing his eyes and allowing the silent tears to flow. “I don’t know, I just always thought it would be special when it happened. Not just with someone I barely know the name of.”
They hadn’t done anything that night, but it had given Martyn an idea; he was determined to give Scott the most beautiful and special first kiss he could, if he would let him.
Based on Scott’s confession and other details he’s noticed from before, Martyn hoped he wasn’t being too full of himself to believe Scott would say yes. They’ve been best friends for years now, and, even if Scott didn’t have any affections for him beyond platonic ones, Martyn was sure Scott would rather he be his first. Hopefully. This whole thing would be awkward if not.
The innocence of a “first kiss” was overrated and pushed by this whole concept of “purity” that only existed to shame people, but, if it was important to Scott, it was important to Martyn. Besides, Martyn was doing all of this out of care and love for his friend, not at all because he found himself thinking about what it would be like on the rare occasion.
Well, “rare occasion” wouldn’t be the correct words considering the frequency of the thoughts, but that was purely semantics.
They were only friends; the kiss didn’t have to mean anything! Scott could decline and have his first be with Ren, the one he would be stage kissing, or he could accept.
Martyn hoped he would accept.
“Martyn, I think I’m ready to retire for the night. I’m almost done with that book I’ve been reading and I think I can finish it before I need to sleep if we get back to the apartment soon.” Scott stretched his arms over his head, joints in his shoulders popping. He let out a faint groan as he brought his arms back down. “Ready to head back?”
“Yeah, we can,” Martyn’s words sped up to ensure he said all he wanted to before he lost his confidence, “but there’s one more thing I want to do first.”
Scott raised an eyebrow at him, curiosity encapsulating his stare. “Oh? What is it?”
“You’ll see.” Martyn stayed vague as he opened the door for Scott, who gave him a look but didn’t question it.
“Martyn, what more could there be?” Scott eyed him, suspicious now, as Martyn climbed into the driver’s seat and started the car. “We’ve already been out all afternoon.”
“I wanted to treat you.” Martyn shrugged as he glanced over his shoulder to check behind him as he started to pull out of his parking spot. “It’s as simple as that, ya know?”
“No, I don’t know! You’ve treated me plenty, Martyn!” Scott exclaimed with a sense of bafflement, eyebrows furrowing. “I don’t understand it. And you won’t even let me pay for anything! You took me shopping, you bought me clothes, we painted pottery, you took me to my favorite pastry place
and
my favorite restaurant; it's been a fairly full afternoon!”
“Ay, why not?” Martyn scrunched his nose briefly, but he kept his eyes on the road. He wasn’t going to end their night with a car crash, thank you very much. “Am I not allowed to treat my, uh, my best friend?”
Scott went quiet for a moment, quiet enough for Martyn to get concerned and risk a glance at him. Scott’s cheeks were flushed and his eyes were slightly squinted as he thought. “I appreciate it a lot, Martyn. You know I do, and I can’t say I haven’t enjoyed being spoiled, but I can’t help but think you’re trying to soften a blow of some sort. What happened? What do you know that I don’t?”
Martyn sucked in his lips, gaze glued to the road in front of him. He didn’t want to see how Scott was looking at him now. Besides, they were almost to the spot he had planned out. “It’s nothing bad, promise. We’ll have our little chinwag, maybe look around, and then head home. Don’t stress.”
“You know that only makes me stress more,” Scott replied very pointedly.
“Do you trust me?” Martyn asked, near instantly regretting it as Scott barked a laugh.
“Okay, Aladdin.” Scott teased, putting a hand over his mouth to hide part of his smile. It faded as his head audibly leaned against the headrest. “Yes, Martyn. I trust you, but I still don’t like it.”
“You will,” Martyn promised, before correcting the overconfident statement, “I hope.”
“Wow, you’re so good at reassurances,” Scott murmured sarcastically before sighing deeply. “How much longer until we get to this place?”
“Patience, mate! But no need to worry; we’re here.” Martyn smirked as he parked the car, somewhat pleased that Scott hadn’t been paying attention to their surroundings. Scott unbuckled his seat belt and went to open his door, but Martyn put a stop to that. “Uh, uh, uh, nope. Close your eyes.”
“Why?” Scott questioned, but he obeyed anyway, closing his eyes and letting his hand drop to his lap. “What’s out here? It’s not my birthday any time soon, so I don’t understand-”
“Relax, Scott,” Martyn ordered as he unbuckled his seatbelt and climbed out of the car to hurry around to retrieve Scott. Scott huffed as a response, holding out his hand for Martyn to take once the door opened. “Just relax.”
“I am relaxed.” Scott said that, but his tone was flat and exasperated. Without his sight, he moved a bit like a newborn fawn, careful and not very balanced. He was forced to trust Martyn, clinging to his hand (and, soon after, his arm as well) as Martyn led him down a trail.
Martyn decided not to annoy Scott, even if it was something he found amusing to do in lighthearted ways, because this was supposed to be a day all about Scott. Or, afternoon, rather. The whole day would be a bit much, considering their typical schedules, and the fact Scott was up late last night and needed to sleep in.
The place Martyn led Scott was fairly secluded, but not too far off the main path. Martyn stopped moving, but he didn’t say a word as he tried to work up his courage. He had made it this far and he wasn’t going to back down now. This was simply a friend helping out a friend, even if his silly crush had lasted a lot longer than he thought it would.
“Are we here?” Scott questioned, still not opening his eyes for Martyn hadn’t instructed him to yet. “I can hear water. You’re not going to drown me, are you? I’ll have you know, I am a fantastic swimmer and I am very good at holding my breath for long periods of time.”
“I’m aware.” Martyn held back an amused snort, knowing full well of Scott’s time on a competitive swim team. He didn’t let go of Scott’s hand, even though he knew he probably should. “And, yes, you can open your eyes.”
Scott’s eyes fluttered open, taking their time to adjust to being able to see again. His eyes widened slightly and his mouth went ajar as he soaked in the landscape around them. Even while turning, Scott never pulled away from Martyn’s grip.
The centerpoint was a creek with gently flowing water and giant rocks big enough to travel on if one desired. Sunlight peered through the leaves of the trees above, but it was otherwise fairly shady and cool. Foliage was plentiful, but their path wasn’t intruded by it for it was well worn. A soft breeze whistled around them, pushing Scott’s dyed cyan curls around. Martyn’s hair was held back enough with his emotional support headband that it didn’t get in his eyes, but he could feel the blonde locks shifting their position against his neck.
“Beautiful,” Scott breathed out, a smile growing on his lips. He didn’t say anything else, simply taking everything in.
“Just like you,” Martyn responded, perhaps too eagerly.
“Flatterer,” Scott accused lightheartedly, but the comment did pull him out of his trance. “Why are we-?”
“Can I kiss you?” Martyn blurted out unceremoniously, surprising both himself and Scott. He had a whole speech prepared, but the words seemed to have hid away with all he could think about was how it may feel to have Scott’s lips on his. “You, uh, you said you never kissed anyone before, and since you have to soon, I figured I-”
“You wanted to make it special,” Scott finished the gist of what he was trying to say, forming an understanding. A dusty pink graced his cheeks, perfectly complimenting the rest of his features. “That is… very sweet. Honestly, I should have guessed, you were acting differently since then, I- You’re such a gentleman.”
“I can when I want to be.” Martyn grinned, relaxing now that Scott was (he assumed) taking it well. Deciding to be bold, Martyn pulled Scott closer to him so their faces were intimately close. He used his free hand to cup Scott’s face, still not letting go of his hand, which Scott essentially melted into.
Martyn brushed his thumb against Scott’s lower lip, and it was promptly followed by a hitch in Scott’s breathing and a soft whine in his throat. Scott finally broke their hand-holding to clench the fabric over Martyn’s hips. He didn’t only catch fabric, however, with his fingers digging into flesh, but Martyn relished in the neediness behind Scott’s actions.
“If you want me to kiss you,” Martyn leaned forward to murmur in Scott’s ear at an octave lower than normal, “you have to use your words.”
“Please, kiss me,” Scott pleaded, resting his forehead against Martyn’s shoulder. His touch snaked under Martyn’s shirt and curved toward his back, gaining enough leverage to pull their bodies flush together.
“Look at me,” Martyn ordered, finding great pleasure in how Scott unfolded for him. They often shared quips, dirty jokes, and innuendos, but the moment it became real, Scott was a mess. Martyn wondered if it was the first time jitters or if he would be like this every time. Void, Martyn wanted to find out. “Can’t do anything with your face buried in my shoulder, ya know. Plus, you can beg better than that.”
“Kinky motherfucker,” Scott accused, gaining some of his typical charming confidence that Martyn was familiar with back. Still, Scott did as he was told, pulling away just enough so they were facing each other again. “Kiss me, or I will bite you.”
“That’s not much of a threat, now is it?” Martyn smirked, tucking some of Scott’s curls behind his ear before continuing until his hand was entangled in his hair. “Maybe I’m into that.”
“We can always discover that another time.” Scott ran his tongue against the bottoms of his teeth with a slight tilt of his head. “Perhaps someplace a bit more private.”
Patience was never a virtue Martyn clung on to very strongly, so the fact he held out this long was truly an accomplishment. Instead of a verbal response, Martyn captured Scott’s lips in a hungry kiss.
He tried to keep the kisses slow to ease Scott into it, considering this was his first, but Scott surprised him with an intense amount of passion only after a few moments to catch his bearings. Martyn had no issue in allowing such a kiss, for he had wanted this for so long. A part of him felt guilty, as if he were using Scott to play out some fantasy, but Scott was clearly consenting.
Based on the comfortable rhythm they fell into and the risque touches that sent pleasure down their spines, Martyn suspected that Scott may also feel similarly to him. How he never noticed before, he had no idea, but he hoped he wasn’t reading too far into it or misinterpreting the sides. He wanted so badly. He wanted Scott. Scott, his best friend and, hopefully, life partner.
The sun was noticeably starting to set by the time they parted for the last time, both of their chests heaving to catch up on the air they neglected to adequately give their lungs. Scott looked stupidly pleased and Martyn knew he looked the same.
“I love you, Martyn,” Scott admitted, genuinely and earnestly. His ocean blue eyes shined like the sun reflecting off the water’s surface, and Martyn knew he could easily get lost in his depths. “I’ve loved you for a while.”
Martyn needed a moment to process what Scott had said, not sure if this was a dream, but Scott gave him time. “You- you do?”
“Yes, Martyn.” Scott laughed, light and airy. He peppered a few brief kisses on Martyn’s face to punctuate each word, “I love you. I’ve loved you for a long time. I don’t see a time where I could ever stop loving you.”
His chest swelled with pleasure and he felt a bit dazed, but Martyn wasn’t sure if that was from the poor air circulation or the fact such a handsome, wonderful man declared his love so openly. “I love you too.”