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"Good evening, everyone. Joining us in the booth tonight is former Centaurs captain Ilya Rozanov."
"And there's Shane Hollander with the puck," Ilya greeted warmly. "Talented and beautiful man with incredible thighs. Married, unfortunately for the rest of you."
The broadcast camera zoomed in on Shane's face.
"That's my husband," Ilya added, just in case anyone had forgotten.
The Ottawa Centaurs are playing Montreal in the most anticipated matchup of the season. Unfortunately for everyone involved, retired Centaurs legend Ilya Rozanov has been invited to guest commentate.
Featuring: biased commentary, Montreal slander, and aggressive husband hyping.
Series
- Part 5 of This Is Why We Have Media Training
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A reporter stepped forward. "Rozanov. Thoughts on Shane's new look?"
"The wolfcut is falling perfectly," Ilya explained. "Also, Shane had very good game tonight. But I could not appreciate properly because I was too busy thinking about how pretty he is."
On Twitter: Rozanov looking at Hollander’s wolfcut like it personally saved his life is my Roman Empire 🙏
When Shane grows his hair out into a wolf cut and starts tying it into a bun, Ilya becomes distracted on the ice, and very publicly on the internet.
Featuring: a viral hair tuck, a possessive tweet, and a team rule that exists solely because Ilya cannot behave.
Series
- Part 4 of This Is Why We Have Media Training
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The woman had her hair tucked under a knit hat, and her eyes were actually kind.
"You are cold," she said.
"I'm fine," Shane said. His teeth betrayed him with a chatter.
She unwound her scarf from her own neck and wrapped it around his.
Eight-year-old Shane goes to a hockey camp in Moscow, becomes a victim to language barrier, and gets rescued by a woman who gives him her scarf and tells him snow angels are real.
Eighteen years later, Ilya finds out his mother had already met the love of his life.
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“Rozanov, back up.”
“Backing up,” Ilya said evenly, “But if he touches my husband again I will explore violence.”
Shane exhaled, resigned. "You are sitting next to me for a reason.”
“Yes,” Ilya agreed. “Leash.”
@downbadinottawa
There are FOSSILS less down than Rozanov. He is WHIPPED and PROUD of it.@montrealdefender
we are getting destroyed by a guy who just publicly admitted his husband controls him. this is the worst timeline.When Ottawa faces Montreal again, Shane keeps it professional. Ilya absolutely does not.
Featuring: one infamous Hollanov Wikipedia page and a professional athlete with a marriage kink.
Translated into Chinese
Series
- Part 3 of This Is Why We Have Media Training
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Summary
“I’ve been conducting surveillance,” Hayden said, steamrolling ahead. “Based on all available evidence, I’m ninety percent sure Lily is either a Bratva princess or some kind of supernatural hybrid who is manipulating Shane emotionally and financially.”
Jackie looked back at the building. All the lights were off.
“And as his friends,” Hayden continued, “we have a duty to protect Shane from her clutches.”
Convinced Shane’s mysterious girlfriend “Lily” is everything from a vampire to a cult leader, Hayden embarks on a spiral of wildly incorrect theories.
He is just trying to protect his best friend. Unfortunately, Lily is actually Ilya Rozanov.
Recent series
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Summary
Snapshots of the Ottawa Centaurs captain, Shane "walks my husband like a dog" Hollander and Ilya "media menace" Rozanov. Best if read chronologically but not required.
- Words:
- 16,770
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 1,144
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Knight to Remember by AutumnFoxed
Fandom 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime & Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga)
05 Feb 2026
- Words:
- 5,811
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 5
Recent bookmarks
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Apogee by OpalApparition
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
09 Mar 2026
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Summary
Shane Hollander is the youngest Commander in ISS history; straight-backed, closeted, and so tightly on his own leash that seven months in orbit with Ilya Rozanov have not produced a single crack in his composure.
Ilya Rozanov is the Russian cosmonaut who should have had his job, won’t stop bouncing a tennis ball off the walls, and is still looking for a fissure. Thankfully, a solar storm finds it for him.
or: Near-death, zero gravity, and the wrong man’s hands in exactly the right places.
A Cosmonaut!Ilya x Astronaut!Shane AU 🚀
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 50,364
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,773
- Kudos:
- 4,397
- Bookmarks:
- 1,843
- Hits:
- 76,861
Bookmarked by AutumnFoxed
12 Mar 2026
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Binding Vows by Silvershine
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga)
02 Aug 2024
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Summary
Satoru Gojo had been killed more than once in his short life... but his death at the age of twenty-nine was widely considered to be the most permanent one yet.
Over a year has passed since the fight against Sukuna and Gojo has returned, but at a great personal cost. Without his techniques and even fewer allies, Gojo struggles to understand what's left when he's no longer the most powerful sorcerer of the age.
Utahime Iori fell for Gojo once before and she already learned her lesson, but circumstances have pushed her back into the path of the man she's tried hard to forget, challenging her resolve and awakening old feelings she vowed to extinguish.
What does it mean to be strong? To be vulnerable? And if forced to choose between love and power, what will win out?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 245,146
- Chapters:
- 32/32
- Comments:
- 1,624
- Kudos:
- 4,149
- Bookmarks:
- 603
- Hits:
- 129,013
Bookmarked by AutumnFoxed
15 Jan 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
The bar is in space, and this fic put it there
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the death of peace of mind by tiddiejoon
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
13 Jul 2023
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Summary
It's shocking how well they get along when they're drunk.
Series
- Part 2 of the most twisted curse of all
Bookmarked by AutumnFoxed
15 Jan 2026
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Caesura by cielelyse for YuliceChan
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
26 Sep 2022
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Summary
The first time they meet, Suguru and Satoru do not like each other. Arrogant, cocky, insufferable, they think. Despite the smirks Shoko gives Suguru, or the sighs Yaga gives Satoru, they do not like each other.
Until a mission changes that.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 85,574
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 1,416
- Kudos:
- 11,753
- Bookmarks:
- 2,949
- Hits:
- 279,862
Bookmarked by AutumnFoxed
22 Feb 2026

