JZXR7
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Forget The Roses, Spare Me The Thorns by JZXR7
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
14 Nov 2021
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Fans all over the continent tune in each year to watch the train wreck of mass-market romance and cringeworthy behavior that is The Bachelor. They sigh over the roses, the confessions of love, the drama. This year, one Geralt of Rivia stars as the leading man in his quest to find true love...
Or so says Tissaia, who will be finding a way to keep her mess of a "show" profitable if it causes a lawsuit. Or ten. Or her own death from over caffeinating.
This disaster in the making is doomed to derail itself, as the contestants seem more interested in dating the crew than in her leading man, who in turn seems more interested in brooding while the host swoons over him.
Surely, everything will be fine. As long as one Yennefer Vengerberg stops breaking into her office and her right-hand woman can stop crushing on the contestant she's trying to recruit as her next bachelorette.
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Two's Company, Three is...A Threesome. by JZXR7
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
09 Jul 2020
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Rita swears she didn't mean to invite both Tissaia and Philippa to her home for sex at the same time. It was totally not her fault. Now, is she likely to do it again? Absolutely. She's not sorry at all.
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Sliding into Her DMs and Her Heart by JZXR7
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
22 Jun 2020
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Yennefer makes questionable choices when drunk, but she stands by this one. Tissaia de Vries is the most attractive politician the district of Aretuza has ever elected, and everyone should know it.
Tissaia isn't sure what to make of a spoiled celebrity announcing her uncontrollable attraction to Tissaia over twitter.
However, the entire fandom and most of the world's reporters are waiting with bated breath to watch the seemingly inevitable train wreck.
They're going to be disappointed. Yennefer's totally got this! She just needs to woo a woman whose reputation decides her employment prospects over social media without getting blocked first.
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i'm your sinner (and your whore) by BloodInTheFields, JZXR7
Fandoms: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
24 Mar 2020
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Due to circumstances entirely beyond Tissaia’s control (Yennefer. Due to Yennefer), she’s found herself trapped in her bedroom with a human whirlwind during a minor pandemic.
She has decided, in all her collected wisdom as Rectoress, that the girl has ten minutes to stop talking before Tissaia takes drastic measures.
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Too Close For Comfort (Why Are You In My Apartment? I'm Calling The Cops) by JZXR7
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
12 Mar 2020
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Tissaia moved out four days ago.
In those four days, her soon-to-be-ex-husband has fallen from first to second on her "People I Would Like To Murder" list.
Number one is her neighbor. Her loud, nymphomaniac neighbor. Who she is not attracted to at all!
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In a world where Renly Baratheon accidentally spent the War of Four Kings on vacation in Dorne, surviving King Stannis's small council meetings takes a clear understanding of people and politics. Luckily, he's here to provide both... or so he thinks.
[Second half finally up. Welcome to the North.]
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It all started in the summer after third year, with a phone call and a hatred of Severus Snape. Harry was yelling into the ‘fellytone’ about his greasy git of his Professor Snape, while Petunia scrubbed a perfectly clean countertop and pretended like she wasn't eavesdropping with glee.
Inspired by my Reddit prompt: https://www.reddit.com/r/HPfanfiction/comments/1lnufnv/aunt_petunia_was_looking_at_harry_with_reluctant/
Love the community on there, thank you so much to everyone who encouraged me to continue with this story <3 -
The Spy Who Loved Me (and also kidnapped my son, that bitch) by valahallalamallala for mippippippi
Fandoms: Once Upon a Time (TV)
26 Sep 2021
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For Emma Swan, Agent of G.O.D.M.O.T.H.E.R., saving the world is just another Tuesday. Her mission: to infiltrate the tiny island nation of Corazón and thwart the latest megalomaniacal scheme of its brilliant but unfortunately evil ruler. This isn't Emma's first time facing off against the twisted mind of some local tyrant, and she doubts this one will be any different from the rest.
It’s amazing how wrong she can be sometimes.
♛
“Agent... Swan, was it?” greets the queen. “Please, sit.”“Never,” she says. “Do you expect me to talk?”
“No, Miss Swan, I expect you to sit and have lunch like a civilized human being.”
Ugh, the food really does smell good. “Lunch?" Emma echoes, sitting down as uncivilizedly as she can. "It’s already two in the afternoon."
“Yes, you were behind schedule." The queen aims a judgmental stare down the length of her perfect nose. "Don’t worry, I accept your apology.”
“You're the worst,” Emma mumbles around a mouthful of salad.
“What was that?”
Emma swallows. “I said, this is a first.” She wishes more people fed her before trying to kill her.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,995
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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Bookmarked by JZXR7
20 May 2025
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you make a really good girl (as girls go) by suzukiblu for Prim_the_Amazing
Fandoms: Avatar: The Last Airbender
01 Jan 2021
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“Oh spirits,” Azula says, grinning widely. The Water Tribe is full of idiots. “You don’t want to marry Zuko, he’s useless. Also, he’s already engaged.”
“He is?” Yue blinks at her.
“Of course he is, he’s going to be the Fire Lord, he’s been engaged since he was twelve,” Azula says. A useless Fire Lord who she’s going to have to prop up, if not outright usurp, but Fire Lord all the same.
The things she does for this family, she swears.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 38,991
- Chapters:
- 4/4
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- 21
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Bookmarked by JZXR7
15 Mar 2024
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Once upon a time, there were two sisters named Sophie and Agatha. This story starts in a village beyond the Woods. Where the other was fair and blonde the other was dark and ugly.
Said the mother of the girls, after an arduous labor, “This one is not to my liking.”
The doctor, a fair woman herself, looked at the mother holding the babies, and knew which one the mother was discussing. “The younger girl could be something special. Perhaps you will love her as much as you do your older one.”
The mother mused, staring at the younger baby. The older one had already been named Sophie. “What to name her?”
The doctor, as she finished checking over the mother, named the younger daughter Agatha. And so her name was, and the mother went to the family house with two babies in her arms.
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Vanessa keeps Agatha.Series
- Part 1 of Blood Ties
Bookmarked by JZXR7
25 Oct 2022