Jos_has_too_many_hobbies
Fandoms
Recent works
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Songbird Versus Rattlesnake by Jos_has_too_many_hobbies
Fandoms: 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series
23 Jul 2023
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Summary
//Songbird versus rattlesnake//
A canary and a snake stand before each other in a clearing. The snake steps towards the canary and holds out his hand.
//“What is it?”//
The canary asked warily
//Eurydice was a hungry young girl//
The canary holds his stolen treasure closer as the snake takes another step.
//“Your ticket”//
The rattlesnake replied, with a smile
//And Hades gave her a choice to make//
They don’t need the others, croons the snake, as he takes another step
//A ticket to the underworld//
They could run away together, says the rattlesnake, and all songbird needs to do is prove his loyalty
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 617
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 5
- Hits:
- 49
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Summary
Mumbo has been keeping his secret pretty well, if he does say so himself. But tonight, between his splitting headache and the hunger pains wrenching his stomach, he knows he's losing control. He never wanted Grian to see him like this, but tonight, he knows that he doesn't have a choice.
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Cards Against Hermit-ity by Jos_has_too_many_hobbies for joju997
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP
18 Mar 2023
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Summary
Helsknight and Evil Xisuma are having a truly epic showdown, when their battle gets derailed by a certain Jhost with the most.
(AKA: The Helsmits play TCG)
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Summary
In which Tango has a very bad time, and Jimmy tries his best to help, even if doesn't quite know how
Recent bookmarks
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mer au :3 by Gladumf
Fandom: 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series
28 May 2025
Summary
all of the fics in my mer au!
the mer au features grian as a marine biologist and mer scar :]
- Words:
- 75,678
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 55
Bookmarked by bluish-jay (Jos_has_too_many_hobbies)
11 Nov 2025
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Summary
Twenty years ago, an attack on the royal palace in Gilded Helianthia left its rulers dead and the country in turmoil. Little Princesa Perla was never seen again, feared to have been lost to the fire like her parents. Today, her former ward Lieutenant M.J. Sausage is the only person left who believes she must still be alive out there somewhere, posting a reward to the tune of fifty thousand gold for the one who can bring her home to him.
Oli Sound is a conman and a crook - he's always looking for the next windfall to keep him fed and sheltered just a few weeks longer, and he doesn't care who he has to lie to to do it. Pearl Moon, orphan and cleaning lady, feels a similar desperation. When their paths cross in the ruins of the abandoned palace, together they hatch a plan that might just get them out of poverty for good. All Pearl has to do is convince the old guard, without believing it herself, that she's the lost princess he's looking for.
It's gonna be a difficult journey, and a hell of a lie - but Oli reckons he'll take the bait for long enough that they can split the money and run. After all, she happens to look just like her!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 34,445
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 325
- Kudos:
- 231
- Bookmarks:
- 47
- Hits:
- 2,403
Bookmarked by bluish-jay (Jos_has_too_many_hobbies)
11 Nov 2025
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Kalix's Boatem Knights Fics by hopepetal
Fandom: 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Hermitcraft SMP
29 Nov 2024
- Words:
- 70,043
- Works:
- 7
- Bookmarks:
- 148
Bookmarked by bluish-jay (Jos_has_too_many_hobbies)
11 Nov 2025
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Summary
Blade-Three, also known as Three, is the living weapon of the Watchers. Conditioned to follow orders, it is meant to use its considerable strength, combat abilities, and total loyalty to obliterate the enemies of the Watchers. Of course, the "following orders" part comes first, which is how, when Listener agent Martyn InTheLittleWood comes along with the right command words, he manages to steal it.
Now, instead of missions that make any sense, Three must navigate as Martyn and his roommate Jimmy attempt to teach it how to be human, or at least enough of a person to be itself. It would help if either Martyn or Jimmy knew how to be human either, and if they weren't falling apart at the seams after the death of an old friend.
(And of course, there's the matter of Three's original identity, a question no one thinks to ask...)
Or: in which Evo had a bad end, and five years later, the pieces that were left behind start to accidentally fall back together.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 78,482
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,210
- Kudos:
- 1,698
- Bookmarks:
- 469
- Hits:
- 26,143
Bookmarked by bluish-jay (Jos_has_too_many_hobbies)
11 Nov 2025
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too much (it was evidence that he was human) by valiant_skeleton
Fandoms: Empires SMP, Hermitcraft SMP
25 Feb 2023
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Summary
“How would you feel about goin’ back to Empires? Maybe the Rift will turn you back into… put you back how you were.”
Tap Tap.
“No? But–”
Tap Tap. No, they couldn’t make him. This was terrible but he would not go back to that. He refused to give up the right to his burning lungs. He would not let his heart turn back to cotton and his joints back to plastic and his voice to a box. He would sooner die.
“Okay, okay, Tim. Take a breath. We’re not gonna make you go back. You’re okay. It’s going to be okay.”
in which the Rift turns jimmy back into a human and abruptly gaining the ability to smell, taste, touch, and breathe goes about as well for him as one might expect.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,359
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 160
- Kudos:
- 1,248
- Bookmarks:
- 187
- Hits:
- 6,743
Bookmarked by Jos_has_too_many_hobbies
06 Jul 2025