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  1. Public Bookmark 24

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    They’ve just turned onto I-89 when Svetlana turns to him and asks, “Have you ever thought about Shane?”

    Truthfully he doesn’t remember the first time he thought about Shane like that. He shrugs, takes a sip of his Dunkalatte, avoids Svetlana’s piercing gaze. “Sometimes. Nothing serious.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,496
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    178
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    1,424

    28 Jun 2026

  2. Rec *

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    “It just feels like such a nothing story," Shane says. "But my mom’s so fucking... worked up about it.” 

    Ilya watches him. “I think,” he says carefully, “that your mom is also the parent of a teenage boy who played on that hockey team. And not just the manager of a person who is being asked for comment on a bad story. Yes?”  

    ...

    (Shane was fifteen years old when he moved to Sarnia.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,094
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    81
    Kudos:
    947
    Bookmarks:
    175
    Hits:
    4,531

    26 Jun 2026

  3. Rec *

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    Summary

    Cliff would probably remember if he was there when Ilya met a woman so earth-shattering that he would chase after her for nearly a decade. Probably. Cliff thinks he would probably notice something as life-altering as a meeting like that. Who on earth is this woman and how did they find each other? Did Cliff watch Ilya’s life change before his eyes and not even realize what was happening?

     

    In the fall of 2017, Cliff Marlow notices evidence of Jane all over Ilya’s apartment. He decides to investigate.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    53,271
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    1,175
    Kudos:
    6,870
    Bookmarks:
    1,831
    Hits:
    99,248

    25 Jun 2026

  4. Rec *

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    Summary

    He’s just about ready to doze off—his ritualistic pre-dinner, thirty-minute nap—when, suddenly, Ilya says, “Huh. Interesting.”

    Shane cracks one eye open. “Hmm?”

    “Oh, nothing, малыш,” he replies, though his brows are furrowed when he says it. Shane’s even more curious now.

    “No, really, what is it?”

    Ilya must lose some internal debate; a deep sigh leaves his body before, wordlessly, he turns his phone to Shane.

    The bright light makes him squint, still not used to Ilya and his affinity for both using the light-mode feature and turning the brightness in his phone to a maximum. He forgoes scolding him when, after his eyes have adjusted, he reads: Metros acquires Fil-Canadian Rivera; second Asian player in franchise history after Hollander.

    At first he thinks, oh, that’s my name. Shane hasn’t seen his name mentioned remotely near the words ‘Montreal Metros’ ever since he transferred to Ottawa three years ago. Then, and this is when it finally dawns on him, Shane thinks: second?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,610
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    182
    Kudos:
    1,602
    Bookmarks:
    374
    Hits:
    12,704

    23 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    assimilation as violence; assimilation as survival.

  5. Rec *

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    Summary

    “I don’t really think about stuff like that,” Shane replies in interviews, his lips wooden at the words.

    ---

    Shane and being haafu, 2nd gen, and Asian.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,860
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    116
    Kudos:
    987
    Bookmarks:
    197
    Hits:
    6,089

    22 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    How could Shane explain it to Ilya, being barely Asian, essentially white, but not fully white, slowly forgetting what made you Japanese before you knew it, and then, what, your boyfriend decides to learn the damn language, ask your mom about it, without even asking you? Asking if you’re still Japanese enough for the effort to be worth it?

    this fic broke my heart in the best way. i teared up in multiple places, just hurting for shane and relating all too well, even if none of it was written to be a complete tearjerker... promise one day i'll get therapy to deal with these hangups too, but like shane, it's easier to just be and not think about it.

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Shane says when he walks into Station 24 for the first time.

    “Hollander,” says none other than Ilya goddamn Rozanov, “Are you lost?”

    (or: a literal heated rivalry)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,152
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    76
    Kudos:
    721
    Bookmarks:
    146
    Hits:
    4,398

    22 Jun 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Mmm. You want it bad,” Ilya purrs, teeth grazing the column of his throat.

    “Yeah,” Shane whines, hating how petulant it sounds. A fresh flare of determination rises up in response. “Just give it to me. Ilya. I can—just go hard. Just make it fit.”

    Ilya laughs quietly, incredulously. It’s hot against Shane’s ear. “Make it fit."

    -

    Or: in the midst of a stressful season, Shane's a little... out of practice. He's not gonna let that stop him getting what he wants.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,548
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    231
    Kudos:
    2,843
    Bookmarks:
    672
    Hits:
    28,340

    22 Jun 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Post-S1. Shane wants to come without anyone touching him. Ilya wants to help.

    Or: Ilya tries to take on Shane's tendency to deprive himself by using ancient Chinese military strategy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,545
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    323
    Kudos:
    2,284
    Bookmarks:
    371
    Hits:
    13,984

    21 Jun 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane Hollander learns there are both pros and cons to accidentally adopting a kitten with your situationship.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,236
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    525
    Kudos:
    4,136
    Bookmarks:
    1,040
    Hits:
    30,551

    21 Jun 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The world did not work like this, with him under Rozanov, with Rozanov fucking him for the first time in his life and then again and again and again. It did not work like hiding his whole life, the important parts of it, from his parents. But also, it did. And fuck if Shane was going to give it all up because he was scared.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,519
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    64
    Kudos:
    428
    Bookmarks:
    124
    Hits:
    3,446

    22 Jun 2026

  11. Public Bookmark 68

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    Summary

    Why are you here; why are we here? Ilya kisses the girl in front of him. The kiss lasts seventeen seconds, Shane counts, what are we doing? Ilya is dragging the tender, ugly parts of them out here for everyone to see. Seventeen seconds, or at least until Rose leans in and Shane insistently presses his mouth on hers to remind himself of what he wants.

    The kiss breaks. Shane has to leave, his body lurching. When he meets Ilya's eyes, he sees the gesture for what it really is: a reminder of his place.

    or; Shane tries. He really does.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,040
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    308
    Bookmarks:
    68
    Hits:
    2,701

    21 Jun 2026

  12. Public Bookmark 60

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    Summary

    Ilya learns Japanese to understand Shane better. Shane does not speak Japanese.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,321
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    51
    Kudos:
    426
    Bookmarks:
    59
    Hits:
    3,698

    21 Jun 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Regina to Edmonton was nine hours by bus if the weather was decent; it took a bit longer if — for example — your bus lost power on Highway 11 just past Dundurn, Saskatchewan.

    Team buses, night drives, and one way things might have started differently.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,060
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    182
    Kudos:
    2,848
    Bookmarks:
    676
    Hits:
    16,867

    21 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    thought i already had this bookmarked! rectifying now

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    So what is the plan now, Mr. Spreadsheet?

    “Honestly I was kind of hoping your consciousness would just click back into your body once I touched you.” Shane scratches the back of his head.

    You treat me like slap bracelet, Ilya complains.

    After a bad hit knocks Ilya’s consciousness out of his body — literally — Shane finds himself sheltering the soul of his decade-long situationship in the back of his head. Turns out it’s a lot harder to keep secrets when you share a body.

    (They definitely still try, though.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,974
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    779
    Kudos:
    5,528
    Bookmarks:
    1,627
    Hits:
    67,099

    20 Jun 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Even before he played his first NHL game, Ilya expected his career would involve bearing the brunt of some dislike. Hockey was entertainment, a spectacle; somebody had to play the heel. He didn’t mind that. He didn’t expect people to dislike Hollander.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,241
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    51
    Kudos:
    459
    Bookmarks:
    100
    Hits:
    2,251

    21 Jun 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Someone posts a photo of Shane looking very in love with Ilya after the first term of the Irina Foundation's hockey camp.

    Ilya’s grinning, his head bowed towards Shane’s, his hand gripping the back of Shane’s neck. They’re in their kit on the ice.

    Ilya's a little blurry, in motion, but Shane's not. It’s Shane’s face. It’s what his face is doing, it has to be. He’s ducked his head, but it’s still visible. He’s looking at Ilya. Shane’s never seen that look on his own face. He didn’t know it could do that. It’s soft and hungry. His eyes are hot. He’s melting under Ilya’s hand. It’s a smoking fucking gun. There’s a fragment of his love on his face, on Twitter.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,762
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    102
    Kudos:
    1,869
    Bookmarks:
    323
    Hits:
    16,696

    20 Jun 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane had been up for hours already. He'd showered and shaved, then came back to bed and tucked himself under the covers, arranged them to look like he'd never left. His eyes were big and dark and too fucking awake for 6AM on a day they had nothing to do and nowhere to be.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,948
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    144
    Kudos:
    1,338
    Bookmarks:
    259
    Hits:
    9,317

    20 Jun 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Everyone hates All-Stars. If anyone asks, Shane does, too.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,143
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    177
    Kudos:
    866
    Bookmarks:
    153
    Hits:
    5,902

    20 Jun 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The question isn’t what Ilya would do to protect that love, but instead what wouldn’t Ilya do to protect that love? Ilya would do bad, bad things for Shane Hollander, in many different regards. Ilya would also undoubtedly wither away and out of existence, if he ever did something that ended up scaring Shane away from him permanently.

    All of these questions are pointless. There’s only one, actual question that needs to be asked: is it better to speak or to die?

    Ilya would argue in favor of death, every time.

    Three months after the incident and nothing has changed. Ilya is charged with taking care of Shane after his wisdom teeth are taken out. It goes about as well as you’d expect.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,975
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    103
    Kudos:
    523
    Bookmarks:
    115
    Hits:
    8,720

    19 Jun 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Statement from Boston Raiders General Manager Rick Doughty:

    We are aware of a video circulating online from earlier this summer of the locker room celebration proceeding Game 6 of the Stanley Cup Final. This was a personal recording of an adrenaline-fueled moment inside our private facilities and was not intended to be seen by the public.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,858
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    122
    Kudos:
    1,412
    Bookmarks:
    134
    Hits:
    10,933

    19 Jun 2026

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