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"I don't leave my meals half finished," says Goro with the frigid, steely sort of resolution Akira's only ever heard in action movies. "I'm going to rend your flesh to shreds. Then, once I've slaughtered you and drunk every last drop of your blood, I'll mount your desiccated husk over the mantel to display to my houseguests."
"Awfully forward for the first date," says Akira, and cracks open a second sports drink.
Vampire AU PWP—does exactly what it says on the tin. Merry fucking Christmas
Bookmarked by boffffmen
18 May 2026
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“I won’t back down,” Goro nods, more to himself than Akira. “But first, a warning: I’m not like you. Or like the other… people,” he spits out, like “people” is in quotation marks, “you dally with. There’s a high probability I won’t enjoy this at all.”
Yes, of course, you’re very special and different and you’re the toppiest top to ever top, Akira doesn’t say.
“Get on the mattress, Goro.”
Bookmarked by boffffmen
17 May 2026
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Goro thought he knew what he and Joker were—they were rivals. They pushed each other, they balanced each other, they fought in battles of the mind, the body, for their morals and ideals. Thesis and antithesis. They were like Robin Hood and the Sheriff. Bond and Blofeld. Holmes and Moriarty.
But James Moriarty never wanted to fuck Sherlock Holmes.
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“In case you've forgotten, this falls under my area of expertise.” Alhaitham starts walking into the kitchen, empty bowl in hand. “I’d worry more about whether you can meet the standard you’ve set.”
The nerve!
“You haven’t won anything yet,” Kaveh calls out.
Alhaitham turns the faucet on. “I didn’t say I did. But if that motivates you to produce a result, you’re free to interpret it that way.”
Kaveh glares at his back, crossing his arms tightly. “Oh, I’ll produce a result. Just you wait.”
It’s on, Alhaitham.
Kaveh and Alhaitham on the constraints of language.
Bookmarked by boffffmen
14 May 2026
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Akechi doesn't care about omegas - nothing thrills him quite like the fight for dominance that comes from clashing with another alpha. So he uses a hookup app to find other alphas who want the same thing.
Of course, his anonymous hookup is none other than the leader of the Phantom Thieves.
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“Fancy running into you here,” Ren tells him in a lazy attempt at a joke. Neither of them laugh.“Did you know?” Akechi hisses back, tries not to think of how this could ruin him, of how Ren somehow has the upper hand here, again, because Akechi has a reputation, a face in the media, and if it gets out that he’s using fancy love hotels to -
“No. Of course not.”
Bookmarked by boffffmen
21 Apr 2026
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kaveh receives four divine revelations from the universe and attempts to bankrupt himself a second time by relationshipcrimes
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
28 Apr 2024
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Or, Kaveh has a dream about a life he could have lived.
Bookmarked by boffffmen
20 Apr 2026
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And then he opens the door, and then he jumps at least one meter back and smacks his head against the closet door with a yelp, because sitting on the edge of Ren's unmade bed holding a mug from Ren's kitchen that says #1 Murder Victim, is Akechi Goro.
"I was invited to supervise your first blowjob on a man," he says, monotonous and unmoved. He sips at his drink before adding, "And, no, Sakamoto, I don't know why I said yes, either."
It's Saturday at Ren's place. Ryuji cannot stress enough how much he was expecting just Ren.
Bookmarked by boffffmen
20 Apr 2026
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Kaveh held back his sarcasm. This guy was already getting on his nerves, and it didn't help that this was his eighth appointment of the day. “Tell me what you’re looking for in a relationship.”
“Companionship," Alhaitham replied. "Someone to go home to. A second opinion when I would like to discuss something. Casual company. Someone to get to know on an intimate level. Someone to be physically comfortable with. Someone who understands me.”
Bookmarked by boffffmen
09 Apr 2026
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“The nurse told me to watch you.”
Akechi’s eyebrow twitches. “I’m perfectly capable of looking after myself,” he says with false cheer. “This isn’t my first concussion.”
When Akira still doesn’t turn around and leave, Akechi’s pleasant mask flickers, revealing a frustrated exhaustion beneath, and Akira realizes he must feel truly terrible. Normally, he wouldn’t let Akira that close to his true feelings.
“Suit yourself,” he mutters. But he doesn’t demand that Akira go away, when he knows that, if he puts his foot down, Akira will listen, so Akira is going to take that as begrudging permission.
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“Time is 22:40. Begin audio notes for case SK-2217—Japanese male, between the ages of 18 and 22, found via anonymous tip. Time of death approximately 24 hours before exam. Mangled ID badge in pants pocket provided the name Akechi Goro, but no matching records have been found yet. Investigation currently underway.”
Akira clicks the button again to pause the recording and sets the manila folder containing the paltry amount of information they have on their newest guest aside. Talking to himself like this still feels a bit strange, especially tonight, when the oppressive silence and emptiness of the coroner's office makes every sound echo like thunder, but Sojiro will be checking his work when he arrives tomorrow morning, and he's determined not to mess up his first solo post-mortem.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,795
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 9
- Kudos:
- 153
- Bookmarks:
- 20
- Hits:
- 1,252
Bookmarked by boffffmen
18 Mar 2026
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be the thing that buries me by MistressEast
Fandoms: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
27 Sep 2020
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Disgusted, Maki braces her elbows on her knees. “So you and whoever are both fucked, then.”
“Not yet.”
Maki snaps her focus to Kokichi. “What do you mean.”
Kokichi shrugs. He’d look unbothered if it weren’t for the undercurrent of tension Maki can sense in every movement. “We’re only fucked if they know. And they don’t. I just have to keep it a secret until it’s too late.” He grins brightly. “That’s why I need your help.”
Bookmarked by boffffmen
18 Mar 2026
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The Virgin Demon Slayer and the Chad Toy Seller by praecipitanter
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
31 Oct 2022
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His first night back in Liyue, Childe is roped into dinner with Zhongli and the mysterious Adeptus Xiao. A brief spar with the Conqueror of Demons leaves Childe with a hunger for more.
Series
- Part 1 of The Ascendance of a Fuckboy
Bookmarked by boffffmen
17 Mar 2026
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The list of places Goro can safely go in Tokyo without running into Kurusu Akira continues to incur great losses. This time, it's his 777 of choice, which is nowhere near his new apartment complex for this express purpose, and yet. Ineffable Joker will always find a fucking way. And if he can't, he'll circle like a bird of prey until a way opens up.
Twelve years later, nothing is conventional and everything is deliberate.
Bookmarked by boffffmen
12 Mar 2026
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It’s not Shane’s fault, really. The being hard and begging Ilya for it in a dirty public bathroom thing.
If he had a nickel for every time it happened, he would now have two.
Or: Guard dog Ilya punches a Metro, Shane gets to live his dream of licking Ilya’s blood, and Ilya finally gets his dick stepped on as god intended.
Bookmarked by boffffmen
09 Mar 2026
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sandcastles (all the pleasure, none of the burden) by prettyshadow (theaujasmin)
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)
21 Feb 2026
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“H’rder,” Shane whines into his mouth, not even trying to interrupt the kiss but speaking pathetically muffled and slurred around Ilya’s tongue.
Ilya knocks their foreheads together, smiles.
“Nooooo Ilya, not before the game, Ilya,” he whines, a sweetly mocking imitation of Shane, “and now look at you, mhm? Why should I ever listen to your complaining, baby, when you’re gonna be such an easy, perfect slut for it anyways?”
Or: Shane plays four-dimensional chess to get Ilya to fuck him even when he tells him no, for Shane-typical control freak reasons, in Shane-typical convoluted ways, with Shane-typical unawareness of this being a sex freak thing. Ilya provides, of course.
Series
- Part 1 of quantum mechanics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,423
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 476
- Kudos:
- 9,445
- Bookmarks:
- 2,361
- Hits:
- 102,343
Bookmarked by boffffmen
01 Mar 2026
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Kaveh’s eyes widen when he sees Alhaitham hovering over him with a dark look. “You said you wanted me, didn’t you?” Alhaitham says, pinning his arms above his head. “Why would you ever leave? You said it yourself, Kaveh. You can’t focus on anything that isn’t me, can you? How could you ever hope to work again in these conditions? You’d just end up right back on the streets, begging for someone to pick you up like a stray dog.” He says mockingly.
“Stop it…” Kaveh whispers, turning his head away and wringing in his grip. “Please—“
“Tell me, do you still want me?” Alhaitham whispers against Kaveh’s ear, nipping it gently. “Don’t lie to me, Kaveh.”
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Or, how to train your roommate into becoming a pliant housewife: a tutorial by Alhaitham.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,347
- Chapters:
- 2/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 114
- Kudos:
- 838
- Bookmarks:
- 156
- Hits:
- 22,856
Bookmarked by boffffmen
28 Feb 2026
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Alhaitham has apparently decided to go about seducing Kaveh in the stupidest manner possible. And yet, that absurdity pales in comparison to Kaveh’s own stupidity—because somehow, against all reason, his roommate’s idiotic attempts to seduce him are working.
Kaveh turns to glare at Alhaitham, and Alhaitham stares back at him levelly—which only makes indignation boil hotter in Kaveh’s gut, even as his eyes drift to Alhaitham’s infuriating lips and start replaying that memory from this morning.
He knows what he saw. He’d watched as Alhaitham rounded his lips, took that banana far into his throat, and slowly dragged his mouth up the length, flicking his tongue at the tip. He’d seen Alhaitham start to repeat the motion, pausing with his eyes locked onto Kaveh’s—and then, with a half-lidded stare, he’d casually taken a bite and walked out of the room, brushing against Kaveh as he left.
Kaveh had been completely awake. And whatever the fuck Alhaitham was doing, it had been completely intentional.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 30,286
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 292
- Kudos:
- 1,399
- Bookmarks:
- 171
- Hits:
- 21,416
Bookmarked by boffffmen
25 Feb 2026
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Summary
series of fics about ilya & shane discovering & engaging in dom/sub dynamics.
should be read in chronological order, but can be read as standalones.warnings: references to homophobia, physical abuse and suicidal ideation,
- Words:
- 51,781
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 689
Bookmarked by boffffmen
07 Feb 2026
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The morals I’m holding, you know they’re gone by HappyBulbasaur for ArcaneStardust
Fandoms: 崩坏：星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)
25 Jan 2026
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“I found the execution uncharacteristically sloppy for your standards,” Ratio admits. “The chip was indeed the variable that troubled me.”
Aventurine laughs, bright and amused, the sound brushing against Ratio’s ear like silk. “So you came to me for answers. As you always do, dear Detective.”
As a detective, Ratio’s life revolves around questions he can’t resist solving. But to someone like him, certain problems risk becoming all-consuming fixations, pulling him into the orbit of someone who has captured his attention more than any case could.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,044
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 47
- Kudos:
- 289
- Bookmarks:
- 46
- Hits:
- 2,487
Bookmarked by boffffmen
06 Feb 2026
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your word is tomorrow, today and yesterday by moonshineflowers (f1uffycl0ud)
Fandoms: Persona 5
02 Feb 2026
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But the problem is that February 2nd does not stay down.
It claws at him from behind. In some sort of panic-sneak attack, it’s there in the clink of dishes, the coffee he makes for himself. It’s in the way the sky darkens and the chill.
feburary 2nd through the years and how fate shapes our choices no matter how subtle.