1 - 20 of 395 Bookmarks by joolja
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Craigslist by Llewcie for AmZ (Boanerges)
Fandoms: Charlie Countryman (2013), Adam (2009), Spacedogs - Fandom, Hannibal Extended Universe - Fandom
07 Nov 2015
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Summary
Prompt: (Gen or slash) After Beth leaves Adam, he thinks about how to deal with everything on his own - selling the apartment, packing for California, communicating with people there - and decides to post an ad on Craiglist. He’s looking for someone who can “take care of things” for him - things that are “messy” and “complicated”. Nigel answers the ad, expecting to be hired as a contract killer. He ends up becoming a very odd version of Jeeves.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,477
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 367
- Kudos:
- 3,206
- Bookmarks:
- 677
- Hits:
- 40,088
Bookmarked by joolja
03 Nov 2025
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- Words:
- 101,022
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 268
Bookmarked by joolja
28 Oct 2025
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Summary
Will just wants to get through his best man duties with as little drama (and as much alcohol) as possible. Sure, the bride he's standing with is his ex, and sure, he might have made out with the other best man at the bachelorette party — but that's not the biggest problem. Will's far more concerned with the fact that his fellow Best Man might just be a killer, and that may not stop them from making out again...
OR
Dev smashed Bringing Up Baby, Arsenic and Old Lace, and a Pepé Le Pew cartoon into a fic because no one was supervising her.
Fic is complete and will update Wednesdays
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,160
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 233
- Kudos:
- 1,646
- Bookmarks:
- 403
- Hits:
- 23,768
Bookmarked by joolja
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
Will Graham has always had trouble with taste. His empathy, which easily picks up on emotions swirling around him, has tainted his tongue. Every home-cooked meal is a curse, flavored with thoughts and emotions he doesn't want. After years of trying to deal with others' cooking, Will has resigned himself to a life of anonymous fast food and frozen dinners — things that don't trigger his empathy.
But when a new doctor shows up and insists on feeding him, Will's palate will be challenged for the first time in years.
Basically: Will can taste feelings, and Hannibal's got some "crème fraîche" he'd like Will to try...
Story is complete and with updates posted Wednesdays.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 29,526
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 336
- Kudos:
- 1,597
- Bookmarks:
- 391
- Hits:
- 18,889
Bookmarked by joolja
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
He doesn't want to have children for the clan that murdered his father, or for the village that let it happen.
Neji and Sasuke discover that they are more alike than they think.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,900
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 86
- Kudos:
- 2,138
- Bookmarks:
- 526
- Hits:
- 12,961
Bookmarked by joolja
13 Oct 2025
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- Words:
- 109,470
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 1,157
Bookmarked by joolja
13 Oct 2025
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Summary
Sakura's house is declared the unofficial ANBU emergency room and so Sakura sees faceless spooks weekly, slipping into her house in the dead of night. They slip into her life just as quietly. They slip into her bed less silently and more enthusiastically.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,967
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 21
- Comments:
- 250
- Kudos:
- 6,111
- Bookmarks:
- 2,127
- Hits:
- 48,806
Bookmarked by joolja
13 Oct 2025
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Adoption by Defenestration; or, A Family Can Be A Fox Demon, Its Jinchuuriki, and Three Dozen Highly-Trained Assassins by elumish
Fandoms: Naruto
02 Sep 2018
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Summary
He will not be the ANBU who let the jinchuuriki plummet to his death out a fourth story window. Let that be another ANBU’s legacy.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,895
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 58
- Comments:
- 639
- Kudos:
- 25,660
- Bookmarks:
- 8,011
- Hits:
- 197,592
Bookmarked by joolja
12 Oct 2025
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Summary
For years, Naruto chased after Sasuke, and every time, Sasuke pushed him away. It was what he thought he wanted, but when the war ended and Naruto let him go, Sasuke found himself truly alone.
What if it wasn't what he wanted anymore?
Bookmarked by joolja
11 Oct 2025
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The Thread Of The Fates by EvanescentDreamer
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
23 May 2025
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Summary
Jaskier finds himself trapped between the world of the living and the dead, with no memories of how it happened. He has no choice but to follow his Witcher guide to Kaer Morhen, the keep of the Lord of the Dead, where Jaskier must remain until either his soul returns to his body, or he passes on.
At first, being confined to Kaer Morhen is the worst fate Jaskier can imagine, but he soon learns the Underworld, and its god, are nothing like the tales paint them. The longer he remains, the more he begins to wonder if staying would be so terrible after all.
Series
- Part 11 of Arranged By Fate, Bound By Choice
Bookmarked by joolja
19 Sep 2025
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The Minor Fall, the Major Lift by inexplicifics
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
20 Aug 2022
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Summary
After the Mountain, Jaskier has no intention of ever getting involved with a witcher again. Destiny has other plans...
Or: The one where Jaskier rescues an injured Cat and the two of them decide to work together to find their Wolves again.
Series
- Part 1 of Composing Hallelujah
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 51,438
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 1,135
- Kudos:
- 8,096
- Bookmarks:
- 1,503
- Hits:
- 125,998
Bookmarked by joolja
20 Aug 2025
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- Words:
- 33,810
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 2,371
Bookmarked by joolja
13 Aug 2025
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close your eyes to the light of daybreak (your heartbeat lulls me to sleep) by Excalis
Fandoms: Naruto
01 Apr 2023
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Summary
“Were you seducing me with our naps?” Sakura asked incredulously.
"Tried and true Nara clan courting technique," Shikamaru affirmed.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,834
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 123
- Kudos:
- 4,281
- Bookmarks:
- 1,327
- Hits:
- 29,073
Bookmarked by joolja
10 Aug 2025
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Summary
The Wave Mission is a failure. Team Seven is captured. Sasuke is gone. Kakashi is next.
Sakura has no choice but to be a hero.
Revised and added to on 29/11/2013. Original version available on my LJ and DW accounts.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,346
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 389
- Kudos:
- 7,503
- Bookmarks:
- 3,402
- Hits:
- 100,536
Bookmarked by joolja
03 Aug 2025
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- Words:
- 37,982
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 32
Bookmarked by joolja
23 Jul 2025
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Summary
Sakura’s finally got her hands on a Bingo Book. There’s no way she could possibly memorize all the information in one go, even though memorization is admittedly what she does best -
So when the page flips to show a face with striking resemblance to Sasuke’s, when the name reads Uchiha Itachi and the status reads missing-nin, when the picture clearly shows her own fucking soulmate tattoo on his cheek and jaw and neck, she’ll remember it in crystal clarity for the rest of her life.
In black and white, ink and paper, Sakura reads the writing on the wall.
Oh shit. My life’s going to suck.
AKA Ever wanted to see an all-stars brawl between every member of Akatsuki and the five kage? Me too ✧٩(ˊωˋ*)و✧ ＊
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,099
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 334
- Kudos:
- 1,837
- Bookmarks:
- 401
- Hits:
- 27,445
Bookmarked by joolja
18 Jul 2025
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Summary
Helping Senju Tobirama through a surprise heat without losing his head and ending up fathering a litter on the Uchiha clan's most lethal enemy had been torture. A test of willpower the likes of which Madara never wants to go through again. Juggling his little brother's furious storm of look-at-me-I-hate-you hadn't helped.
The fallout should have been easier by comparison! Just tell the Elders to butt out of his sex life, let Izuna find them a lover that could hold a candle to that bleached bastard,
not feel guilty that Tobirama's own marriage prospects were now ruined,plot behind everyone's backs with the clan leader of their most terrible enemy, not alienate his lovely, paranoid, adorably pining little brother by babying him too much, tell the Elders to butt out of his sex life --Easy.
Meanwhile Izuna despairs of making his brother ever see reason and Tobirama goes dutifully on to his solitary end. See? Easy.
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Sequel to "blood rare and sweet as cherry wine".Series
- Part 2 of cherry wine
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 101,992
- Chapters:
- 10/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,143
- Kudos:
- 2,801
- Bookmarks:
- 644
- Hits:
- 71,256
Bookmarked by joolja
17 Jul 2025
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Summary
"Oh," Izuna said -- delicately, while studiously reading his folder, "I'm afraid we need someone with a ... strong personality for Naohime."
"Why's that?" Hashirama replied, just as painfully polite.
The daimyo's mediator kept watching them and scratching little pointy words in his notebook.
"Because if your man doesn't prove that he's dangerous and has the personality to use it on her if she pushes him, it's going to turn abusive," Madara drawled.
Hashirama stared at him for a blank second. The daimyo's envoy stopped writing; even his stone-faced Aburame bodyguard arched her eyebrows over her darkened spectacles.
Tobirama stretched out across the table without another word to take back one of the folders Izuna had spread around him.
--
The daimyo is over the whole Uchiha/Senju war. They're going to become one people if they know what's good for them.
Madara hates it enough without having to marry a woman too.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,914
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 180
- Kudos:
- 6,514
- Bookmarks:
- 1,633
- Hits:
- 38,876
Bookmarked by joolja
15 Jul 2025
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For this her loveliness was curved (--And carved as silver is:) by llamallamaduck
Fandoms: Naruto
01 Mar 2022
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Summary
It all started a month back, when Itachi forgot that he was a gentle child, moments away from dissolving into masochistic rituals of repentance.
Series
- Part 3 of Set in Naruto-verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,015
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Collections:
- 14
- Comments:
- 430
- Kudos:
- 3,138
- Bookmarks:
- 1,014
- Hits:
- 44,593
Bookmarked by joolja
15 Jul 2025
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Tags
Summary
Karin's life seems to be on a trajectory where she simply cannot have normal problems. Most lab accidents are things like "set the bunsen burner too high," but Karin's lab accident time-travels a Hokage into an out-of-use Oto hideout.
[Karin/Minato, crackship treated seriously with some humor, adventure, and a lot of talking about feelings, ugh.]
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,537
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 133
- Kudos:
- 694
- Bookmarks:
- 292
- Hits:
- 7,229
Bookmarked by joolja
14 Jul 2025