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There's No Way You're This Stupid by Coppernuggets, DragonFruitFlamb3
Fandoms: Pressure (Roblox)
05 Dec 2025
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Summary
[Written by Dragonfruitflamb3, edited from chapters 9 to 32 by CopperNuggets]
Sebastian Solace is trying the best he can to work his way out of the Hadal Blacksite while still staying sane as he has to deal with the pathetic human expendables.
Unfortunately for him, he might be two steps away from snapping, all thanks to a chatty new 'friend' who's far more lucky than he'd like. Though, he'll have his fun with how readily they listen to him.You are a nosy little newbie who Very Much So should Not be on death row, so getting an opportunity to avoid that is great! You're going to take this chance to continue your work, and maybe also find out what the heck is up with the monsters down here? Because those exist. Apparently.
They said something about escaping, making it to the end, yadda yadda. For now, there's research to collect and documents to earn.Series
- Part 1 of TNWYTS
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New Mexico, 1964.
Dell Conagher has seen and done a lot of things in his line of work. Working for Blutarch Mann — something he thought he’d never consider in his lifetime. Though considering his family’s legacy, it isn’t exactly out of the realm of possibility.
The incomprehensible mystery he finds on the side of an Interstate in the middle of his business trip, however, not so much an impossible possibility. Harboring a being that shouldn’t be, turns out to be much more than Dell ever bargained for.
This is the story of how the Engineer first met Pyro.
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MSPA Reader reflects on their current situation and unhappiness at not being able to see their old friends and quadmates again. They accept that they past they once knew them in no longer exists, but what about the present?
Aka MSPA Reader reunites with adult Mallek and there are feelings to be had.
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“What--” He stops to compulsively lick his lips. His back hits the wall-- he’d started backing up at some point and he hadn’t noticed. He can’t tear his eyes away from the man on his couch. No. The creature. “What are you?”
Martin finally looks up from his book. He looks at Jon. He doesn’t look like Prentiss. He isn’t full of gaping holes that should have killed him, he isn’t covered in squirming, shiny white worms, he doesn’t smell like a moldy, rotting corpse. He looks like a pleasant, normal man. He has freckles scattered across the bridge of his nose, his cheeks. Monsters shouldn’t have freckles, Jon thinks nonsensically.
“I’m your boyfriend,” the monster sitting on his couch says, as if this is a matter that is not up for debate, that Jon has no say in.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 82,715
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 332
- Kudos:
- 1,738
- Bookmarks:
- 520
- Hits:
- 22,985
Bookmarked by redmeat
09 Mar 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
yessss web martin yessssssss martin angst yesssssssssssssss
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Summary
“Anyway, as fun as it’s been crying like a baby twice a week, I cancelled the rest of my sessions after the next one. I don’t have insurance and I’m basically over the hump, I think.”
“You’re.” Lawrence looks around desperately as if the furniture might agree with him. “It’s been two months, Adam. You’re not ‘over the hump’ in two months.”
Adam and Lawrence both lived. Here's how they get their shit together afterwards.
Series
- Part 1 of Strip the Paint
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“A demonstration?” Jon asks, and the words come out very level, very careful. He’s still frozen in the same position, like he’s afraid he might spook off a bird that’s miraculously landed on him by moving.
Tim opens his mouth to reply, but only manages it on the second try.
“Yeah,” he says. “Hands on, you know. Let you get to see the thing for yourself.”
“And you would be tying up…” Jon says, trailing off into a silence that begs to be filled, answered.
“You,” Tim confirms, and he thinks he sees Jon shiver as he says it. “I couldn’t-- can’t tie myself up, after all.”
“But I can’t-- I don’t do that,” Jon says, as if remembering himself. He almost sounds disappointed. “I don’t-- I don’t enjoy sex. I’m very certain of that much, I made sure. I can’t--”
“Who said anything about sex?”
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Tim shows Jon the wonders of bondage.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,985
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 182
- Kudos:
- 1,609
- Bookmarks:
- 399
- Hits:
- 14,653
Bookmarked by redmeat
09 Mar 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
IT'S SO GOOD we love unordinary approaches to bdsm
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won my bride in a poker game by Prim_the_Amazing for ephemeral_lynn
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
19 Sep 2021
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Summary
He peers between the branches at the spiderweb, gently pushing some away to get a better view. He wonders what kind of spider it is, if he can catch a glimpse of it. There aren’t that many types in England, but--
Oh. He doesn’t spot the spider, but there’s something else trapped in the middle of the web. A large moth, its wings splayed helpless and immobile. As he watches, he sees its legs wriggle ineffectually in the air. It’s a surprisingly pitiful sight, making Martin’s heart unexpectedly wrench a bit for the poor thing.
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Martin saves a moth from a spider. He doubts that this decision will have any sort of serious repurcussions.
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The house of cards Adam built had to fall eventually.
He just wished that Jonah wasn't underneath it all.(Or, Adam's an alternate and searching for answers during an investigation, while simultaneously trying to keep Jonah out of an alternate-infested house. It goes terribly.)
***Not on hiatus! I simply have no semblance of an upload schedule.***
Series
- Part 3 of Sleeper Agent
Bookmarked by redmeat
09 Sep 2023
Bookmarker's Notes
so happy to find a sequel to the motel fic this story is great i love watching men experience horrors
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Delinquent Basil AU
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“He won’t even fight back! Fucking pansy!”Basil quivered with anger and his own sobs as he closed in on himself. What these idiots didn’t know is that pansies were some of the most resilient flowers he’d had the pleasure to grow.
Another kick plummeted into his gut.
No matter what seemed to happen to them, they always seemed to pop back.
A punch hit his jaw, and he tried feebly to bite out at the hand that did it.
His grandmother ran over a bed of them with her car one time. All the blossoms died, but the roots remained.
The same hand roughly gripped his face, their stubby fingers digging in, clamping his mouth closed like an iron vice.Rain, snow, even hail, those stubborn flowers just never seemed to die.
His hair was being grabbed and pulled. Basil cried out in pain. Won’t they leave? They won, just go…
Those stubborn flowers just wouldn’t die.
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Engie is a big ol’ marshmallow, and Pyro wants to toast him and eat his gooey insides. It’s only kind of a metaphor.
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“A gift, an incentive to gain Zagreus’s affections, for the longer you dawdle, the greater the pain will become.”
Aphrodite gives Hypnos a ‘gift,’ which is just a fancy way of saying ‘curse.’
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 30,774
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 214
- Kudos:
- 2,220
- Bookmarks:
- 692
- Hits:
- 36,518
Bookmarked by redmeat
13 Apr 2023
Bookmarker's Notes
arhgahrhghh i love hypnos!!!! *pipebomb in your mailbox*
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“What do you want?” Bruce asked quietly though his voice always sounded threatening when he spoke to Edward. “Did your nose heal too fast? Hmm? Want me to fix that?”
Edward smiled to himself. “Bruce Wayne,” he said, sounding scandalised. “Don’t you know you’re on school grounds?”
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Edward may not be as strong as Bruce Wayne, but he sure as hell is smarter. AKA the high school AU where they hate each other's guts
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toolpack's hfjone stuff (in chronological order) by toolpack
Fandom ONE - Cheesy Hfj (Web Series)
26 Aug 2022
Summary
hi i put all of my fics in the chronological order for convenience
- Words:
- 23,539
- Works:
- 7
- Bookmarks:
- 46
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What if Johnny had not killed Edgar? How much of a difference can one person make?
Series
- Part 1 of Vargas Stories
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What would (or rather will) happen once Virga find Rylie ? Who will defend her ?
This fan fiction is an exploration of that...
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College AU. Yma wakes up somewhere unexpected... and embarrassing. Also kinda gay
Another Valentines request!
Series
- Part 8 of Gloomverse Valentines
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How did Xela know Green's name?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,255
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 12
- Kudos:
- 15
- Bookmarks:
- 2
- Hits:
- 175
Bookmarked by redmeat
17 Jan 2020
Bookmarker's Tags:
Bookmarker's Notes
very cool epic gud job :]
anyway, if YOU think you can fool me by posting this anonymously, then you are WRONG i know exactly who you are YES YOU. RIGHT THERE. YOU. also thank you.
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Madam President finds the Judge watching the rain.
Request from Yume, @slothydaydreamer on tumblr!
Series
- Part 1 of Gloomverse Valentines
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Dave’s fucking tired of hiding behind masks and shades and metaphors. He’s built his entire life on these lies, on these layers of separation, and he feels that maybe, it’s finally time to recognize how being so distant has hurt him.
(Dave and Karkat are classmates and don't even know it. Things get complicated and a bit messy.)
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Eden's workday at the lab is interrupted by the arrival of a new colleague, the mysterious Miss Spider.
There's something... off, about her."Eden," she asks, "have you ever been?"
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,779
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 10
- Kudos:
- 37
- Bookmarks:
- 6
- Hits:
- 424
Bookmarked by redmeat
21 Nov 2019
Bookmarker's Notes
me whenever my friend makes any content: talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping, spectacular, never-the-same, totally unique, completely-not-ever-done-before.