Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Optimus loved Megatron. Don't get him wrong. He was over both of cybertron’s moons  the war is over and he's glad he is able to conjuxed to the silver mech. 

But what he never realized was that Megatron had a nasty habit.

No, not anything as serious as dark energon which he had previously had. 

The previous warlord had a habit of falling into recharge anywhere. Not like a couch or an armchair.

Optimus had just previously called enforcers over his Conjux being missing since the last recharge cycle. You're probably thinking ‘Optimus didn't realise he was missing?!’ 

Optimus had fallen asleep at his desk so no, he didn’t until the morning when he went to wake Megatron up and the berth sheets were untouched since the last recharge cycle. So like any concerned Conjux he looked around and asked if anyone had seen a large silver warlord walking around. And most bots said no and it had forced his servo into calling the enforcers and a whole search party was initiated. 

So this search party had been going on for awhile and he eventually was forced to go into a council meeting as they had insisted as rebuilding of a planet was going on and they promised to keep it short and Ratchet who had sweetly and enthusiastically encouraged him (whilst holding a wrench threatening to launch.)

In the meeting Optimus begrudgingly sat and was thinking of horrible scenarios that could’ve happened to Megatron.

‘What if he was attacked by bandits? Or space pirates?’ - no there would’ve been aware they had guards covering all rebuilt areas.

‘What if he ran away? - no, no he would’ve ran away before they got conjuxed unless he wanted to have the ceremony and celebrate only as he did joke about the time before. Although he is overly fond of chocolate covered oil cake.  No he wouldn’t have. He had left his poetry book in their habsuite and would have definitely taken it with him if given a chance.

‘What if he was kidnapped?’ - highly doubt it, he wouldn’t shut up for the life of himself and they would’ve returned him by now.

Optimus had been bouncing his pede restlessly under the table in thought and had kicked something. At first he thought he had kicked the ambassador who was sitting next to him, pede. Thankfully his battle mask was on because he had cringed at himself and gave a side eye to the ambassador who was a red mech who was still listening to the two senators arguing. 

Optimus raised an optical brow. Weird. Okay it’s fine just don't mention it. Yes, look the other way. Don’t make optic contact, don’t make optic contact.

He continued listening to the argument thinking of where his poor conjux could be and worrying until the senator who had been yelling paused and had squeaked. Okay that was an understatement. they had squealed in terror and jumped on their seat to which everyone except Optimus had verbally attacked him for.

 “What in the pits?!”

”Senator! please! This is a professional meeting!”

“The Prime is here for Primus’ sake! Get down!” 

However the senator was gasping “There’s something under the table!” 

Optimus in all curiosity looked underneath expecting anything. but not this.

His beautiful and terrifying Conjux. his Megatron under the table curled up in recharge. Recharge. 

“Megatron!” Optimus gasped as he grabbed a leg strut to pull Megatron out and ended up getting kicked weakly by the other one.

Senators were muttering amongst themselves and guards stared in bewilderment as the Primme tried to shake his Conjux awake.

After that embarrassing moment, Optimus excused himself from the meeting as Megatron wasn’t waking up. But seriously you would assume he was in a coma with how much he was sleeping. He had to take Megatron back and it wasn’t until in the early evening he got up.

Megatron rose grumbling as his optics rebooted and once he saw Optimus he began glaring at the Prime like he’d taken his first sparkling. 

Optimus however wasn’t happy either “would you like to explain yourself or should I just begin my lecture now?” 

Megatron still glared “Explain what? Am I not allowed to recharge? do I have no rights?”

Optimus wasn’t sure he could raise an optic brow higher “Under a table in the conference room in the council building?” 

“What?” Megatron looked confused but was also scowling “I was in our habsuite”

“No, you were underneath a table.”

“Orion, I think I would know where I recharged, thank you.” 

“Now Sweetspark, I had literally carried-”

“You’re upsetting me!” Megatron whined, throwing a berth pillow at Optimus who had caught it “Stop being ridiculous! I would never fall into recharge under a table!" 

Optimus just narrowed his optics. "At least I have documented evidence.” He muttered under his breath as he let Megatron win this. Yes he said 'let' he's a very gracious mech and is going to be the bigger bot in this situation.

And after that they had been out to eat dinner at a nice restaurant that had recently opened and ended up swarmed by enforcers and reporters as Optimus forgot to call the search party off and everyone wanted to know where Megatron had been.

That’s why most of dinner Megatron was silently fuming and decided to order most of the entire menu to Optimus' credit account's dismay.

‘You don't even like iron filling quiche’ Optimus muttered and had pointed out as the waiter had walked away.

‘How would you know? We had been at war for eons and things changed.’ 

‘Either way, Megatron, I am your conjux now and I swear on the matrix you only did this to be petty.’

‘You called the enforcers on me.’ Megatron sulked, crossing his arms.

‘I called them for you.’ Optimus groaned, resisting the urge to roll his optics. ‘It’s not as though I asked them to arrest you.’

‘Well it's in the past now, let's enjoy this nice evening now shall we?’ Megatron hummed as though he hadn't stressed Optimus out nearly the entire day.

Yes, of course. Easy enough for him to say, he's not the one paying.

Chapter Text

It was a considerably hot day in the Iacon City centre. Mechs and Femmes from all different planets and all forms and sizes had all swarmed the city centre. Bannisters hung high as the sun glared down onto the crowd as the two ex leaders turned Conjuxes of two major factions stood close near the back of the stage..

“Why do you get to wear a cape?” Megatron asked as his long silver claws repositioned the clasp on Optimus’ shoulder making it straighter.

“Because I'm the Prime?” He said as though it was obvious but then murmured “I’m not sure honestly. Starscream had told me it was compulsory.” Optimus shrugged.

Megatron raised an optic brow at that. “Well now, I'm sure if he had told you to drive off a cliff you’d listen to that as well like a turbodog.” Ok he’s in a mood, Optimus noted. “But, why is he even allowed out of his cell?” Megatron muttered as he side eyed Starscream who was standing to the side talking to Windblade or well perhaps bickering.

“Bots ask me the same thing about you as well” Optimus mused as the long red cape which was quite heavy and had kept moving forward beneath his pedes and he kept trying to push it back. “Primus, i feel as though im going to overheat”

“Well I'm different that’s obvious, we had sexual tension for millenia it was obvious” Megatron muttered and glanced around “Well it's your duty Prime. As the prime of cybertron and prime to our people and prime prime blah blah blah”

“You're rude” Optimus tried to frown but it ended up turning into a small upside down smile.

“You act surprised as though you had no knowledge of this.” Megatron rolled his optics shoving his conjux lightly which resulted in Optimus wrapping a servo around his waist and pulling Megatron closer to him.

“I thought you’d be nicer to me since I am your Conjux and was previously your Amica” Optimus said.

“Well you thought wrong” Megatron said and turned his attention to the podium where starscream walked up to and tapped the mike. Seems as though the event was starting. Megatron removed Optimus servos off his waist and had instead wrapped his arm around The Prime’s arm as the Prime had decided to place his battle mask on.

Megatron looked over his shoulder to his Conjux and squinted his optics and muttered “Optimus, remove it we are at an event for pits sake not a battlefield.”

“You’re just jealous you don’t have one”

That had earned him a kick to the shin.

—-

Starscream tapped the mike with those pointed claws which had made a disturbing noise causing bots to groan “Oops” he muttered and glared at it as though that was going to fix it “One two three, one two- is this thing even on?” his screechy voice echoed through the mike. Yep, working. Starscream was going to be honest he was not having the best day. First he had gotten a second chance, some reformation which he had scoffed at but it was better than rotting in a cell and he was allowed to be closer to his conjux Skyfire.

But apparently he was assigned to do mundane tasks and one of them happened to be babysitting Knock Out’s little brat, Wildbreak. The little glitch is an exact copy of his sire from the blue paintjob to the yellow optics. No wonder Knock Out adores the brat. But apparently the little sparkling is an angel was what he was told from the red medic and oh my he couldn’t have been even more wrong. The brat wouldn’t shut up when his creators had left to go on some stupid date apparently needing time for only each other. Starscream didn’t actually mind babysitting as he’d get access to high quality wax and polish which he was in desperate need of after sitting in a cell for a while.

Anyways the little sparkling had somehow trashed the entire habsuite during the time starscream had been in the washracks sobbing whilst looking at himself in the mirror. Primus, how does he always look this good? Now whatever, he had returned and had to spend a joor cleaning and unfortunately realized he had actually had a speech to do at some event and had left the sparkling in the care of…who was it? Either one of Soundwave’s brats or Motormaster. But he couldn’t care less. He is a busy mech and Windblade kept handing him flashcards as though he was incompetent and he refused them.

—----

‘I’m hungry, ' Megatron whined, leaning against Optimus and tugging his arm..

“Okay, well what do you want me to do?” Optimus said quietly..

“Get me food?” Megatron said as though it was obvious.

“My love, Starscream's about to start speaking” Optimus sighed exasperated and was pointing it out to his conjux.

“And that matters because?....”

“Because-” Yet he was cut off as Megatron cut him off.

“Hey…Isn’t that the councilman who got into that bar fight with his Amica the other cycle?” Megatron said slowly as he was looking into the crowd at some mech.

“Oh yes, apparently one of them was hospitalised”

“Well I doubt it was him, he looks perfectly fine."

“However he does have a slight limp” Optimus pointed out.

“True”

“Why on earth did he fight his Amica again? From what I heard they were apparently just very drunk.”

Megatron tutted and shook his helm “No it was because The councilman’s amica had slept with his Conjux.”

That made Optimus gasp “What?”

“I know” Megatron sighed “Poor mech found out through his Amica’s Conjux who was devastated herself that her Conjux had cheated on her.”

“Oh my Primus”

“I know.” Megatron mused and then said abruptly after the pause. “Would you ever cheat on me?”

“No.” Optimus said without hesitation “I know you’d cut my spike off if I ever did, but I would never do that. I love you too much to do that” Megatron hummed and stared at his faceplates as though analyzing him.

“Sap” Megatron said, rolling his optics but fighting a smirk but turned his head to Starscream's direction as the seeker had begun to speak.

“Fellow Cybertronians! Today-”

Megatron tuned it out and just stared ahead pretending to listen. Primus, this is boring. He wants to go home. Optimus wasn’t paying him any attention. He looked up slightly at his conjux who was indeed listening to the speech. Wow rude, now his processor was running. Would Optimus love him if he was a turbofrog? He had to, he said he loves him. Would he cheat? No, the Prime loved him too much, even in the war he always believed Megatron would change his ways and he had said he wouldn’t.. Whatever- PRIMUS DID STARSCREAM JUST GET SHOT?!?

—-
Starscream had innocently been doing his speech and quite amazingly he said so himself. Everything had been going well until well…he saw IT. And by ‘it’ he meant Knock Out who had probably driven fast even to burn his tires had transformed at the edge of the crowd and was making a beeline towards the stage, a navy blue military truck followed slowly behind and had transformed into a large blue mech.

“STARSCREAM!” Knock Out’s voice yelled as he climbed the stage. “You little glitching pit born monkey wrench! I am going to cut you open and rip your insides apart!”
—-
Optimus and Megatron’s helms snapped to the drama after both had almost been dozing off. They looked at the screaming and then each other and then how Knock Out was getting closer to Starscream then they looked at each other. Optimus being the noble mech he stepped forward however Megatron whose arms were wrapped around the Prime’s pulled him back. “No, don't, this is the most interesting thing that’s happened all day.

—-

“Knock Out?!” Starscream sputtered out moving back, optics widened. He knows what he's done but he'd hoped Knock Out wouldn’t have realized this fast!

“You left my baby with Motormaster?!?” the medic roared and lunged at the seeker.

Starscream yelped and screeched “Well I didn’t wanna babysit him!”

“You glitch! My baby’s yellow now and it’s all your fault!”

And as Knock Out tried to claw at his face he saw him. Him. Wildbreak was carried by his Sire and instead of adorning a navy blue paintjob it was replaced with a ghastly neon yellow. Yep and it did not suit him.

Knock Out shook him and was screaming. Starscream was also screaming or well you could call it screeching because in his defense Knock Out pulled the saw blades out.

—-

“Stop laughing!-” Optimus hissed as he grabbed his Conjux’s waist turning him around so his back was facing the crowd and his faceplates shoved in Optimus’ shoulderplates. Megatron was laughing hysterically.

“Oh my primus- stop it - i can’t” Megatron snickered and swore he could feel coolant in his optics. “I know you're laughing too!”

“And I‘m wearing my mask and at least I'm not cackling”

Just as he said that Megatron looked over his shoulder and wheezed and shoved his faceplates into Optimus' shoulderplates laughing and gasping for air
—-

“Security!” Starscream screeched and kicked Knock Out’s arm away slightly as the buzzsaw buzzed fast.

—---

Breakdown, who was holding Wildbreak and Skyfire stood at the edge of the stage. Skyfire looked terrified and as though he was contemplating going to help his boyfriend whereas Breakdown was just cockblocked by his older brother calling and complaining about babysitting Wildbreak and of course Knock Out -whose panel’s were opened and valve was glistening and ready as his pedes were hooked around Breakdown’s helm- panicked and shut his panel and stormed up and out of the hotel screaming into the comms that Starscream was meant to be babysitting.

And they went back to their habsuite and found it trashed with Motormaster sat there and Wildbreak there too. Oh wildbreak gave his creators a spark attack. His entire frame was yellow. Not blue but yellow. Breakdown could’ve sworn he saw Knock Out’s life flash before his optics. Cue more yelling as Knock Out started on Motormaster who just shrugged and yelled back saying he was already like that and was alone when he came here. He claimed Starscream called him and said there are some dirty holo-movies waiting for him if he agreed and that the sparkling was already asleep.

“So Starscream huh?” Breakdown decided to start a conversation with the shuttle.

“Yeah- oh my primus is that your Conjux?”

“Who? Oh Red? Yeah that’s my Conjux Knock Out. We've been together since before the war. Even have a sparkling.” He said holding Wilbreak up who was chirping angrily.

“I can’t handle this anymore” Skyfire mumbled and stepped forward but Breakdown stopped him.

“Yeah buddy just by looking at you I can tell you're not going to survive that and I’m not letting you lay a servo on my Conjux” He passed over Wildbreak to Skyfire who blinked at the sparkling who was tiny and pouting and terrifying in his arms “Hold him for a minute would ya? thanks “ And Breakdown stormed the stage to the medic and seeker wrestling on the floor. “Oh scrap! Knock Out not the prod!-”

—---

“Do you have anything to say for yourselves?” Optimus’ voice bellowed as the Prime gave a hard look to Knock Out and Starscream who were standing on the other side of the table and Megatron was sat beside him but was his chair facing the two as he kept giggling into his servos with his helm down.

“Yes, that Starscream needs to go rot in the pits”

Starscream made an offended squawk at his wings flaring “Why you!” he growled “You dirty pit scavenger!”

Megatron wheezed and snickered into his palm as Optimus rolled his optics as the tow kept bickering but put his servo on the silver mech's backstrut wondering when this was going to be over with..