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It was a stupid fucking idea. That had already been established beyond reasonable doubt. However, Healy was not entirely opposed to stupid ideas, and often encouraged them, even passively, just to see what happened. That's how he ended up here, wasn't it?
It seemed to happen in a blur. It wasn't like there was a discernible point in which he could've thrown up his hands in disgust, or exhaustion, or- or-
“Y'like?” March was leaned up against the orange wood of his bathroom door frame, the pale backlight lighting him up like a star. “Is it convincing, at least?”
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Holland March taps into his feminine side for a case. Jackson Healy, despite himself, also really wants to tap into March's feminine side.
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Blackmail. Illegal porn. Undercover at a gay bar. The Nice Guys sure are at it again.
“Porn? I can throw a rock in this neighborhood and I’m gonna break the window of a porn store.”
March gestured anxiously, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Healy paused. “Ohhhhh. The nasty stuff. Whips and handcuffs. Girls and animals.”
“Close,” March said, grimacing. He really, really didn’t want to have to explain this. “Think more like…. Disco.”
“Disco?” Healy raised an eyebrow. “What, like the queer music? You think the back room of that store is full of porn for… For disco fans.” He nodded thoughtfully a couple of times. “And you’re an expert about this?”
For a second the whole world went white around the edges and March thought he might pass out. He was too sober for this conversation. What exactly had Healy noticed that morning, how obvious exactly had his full-body reaction to Healy’s hand on his neck been? “I was a happily married man!” March said, and as soon as it came out of his mouth he knew it was wrong. Too fast, too high-pitched, too loud.
Incriminating.
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He wanted to smell what Healy’s sweat was, especially when the man was surely extra ripe, going by the massive amount of translucent fabric under his armpits.
Holland gasped, which let Healy stuff his tongue into his mouth, and then smushed his hands into said armpits, digging the pads of his fingers harshly against the plush flesh until he felt the gritty texture of hair.
If he couldn’t smell it, he could at least try to taste it.
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established marchly w some sweat kink and some angst
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Holland March has a proven plan of attack for when he wants to get truly, thoroughly fucked by Jackson Healy. It’s simple, effective, and plays to his strengths. It goes like this:
Step one: wind him up.
Step two: watch him go.
(In other words: 5k words of smut in which March is a bit of a brat, Healy is a little mean, and they are both so into it.)
Series
- Part 2 of they're not that nice
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The Care and Keeping of One (1) Holland March by Garden_of_Nineveh
Fandoms: The Nice Guys (2016)
14 Jun 2026
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With all the Gosling propaganda circulating atm, I've been swept up.
Just three short chapters about Healy dealing and caring and loving his silly partner, in every sense of the word.
(warning: the r-word is used in the first chapter)
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The Place Beyond the P.I. by SenyoRita990
Fandoms: The Nice Guys (2016), The Place Beyond the Pines (2012), Holland/Luke, RGCU - Fandom
02 Jun 2026
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This story is set before the events of The Place Beyond the Pines and The Nice Guys.
A few months after losing everything, Holland March packs up his daughter and heads east with no destination in mind.
As father and daughter drift through small towns and quiet highways, Holland struggles to move forward from the life he left behind.
Then one evening in a sleepy town called Altamont, a chance encounter at a Motorcycle Stunt Show catches his attention.
For the first time in a long time, Holland can't seem to look away.
And for reasons he doesn't quite understand, he doesn't really want to. -
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A Jazzbar fic about getting together and what comes after
Series
- Part 3 of Ryan Gosling Cinematic Universe
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in which jackson healy beats up holland march and for some reason, march doesn't want him to ever stop
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"Oh my god!" March squeaked, suddenly sitting up straight. "Oh my god, Healy— you're hard!"
Healy wanted to disappear. Or punch March in the face. Or both.
aka: Holland March is a huge tease and has to deal with the consequences. (He doesn't mind.)
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เขาอยากให้มาร์ชเลิกบุหรี่ให้เร็วที่สุดเท่าที่จะเป็นไปได้ ดังนั้นเขาต้องหาวิธีให้อีกฝ่ายหันมาสนใจสิ่งอื่นแทนบุหรี่
" ลองหาอะไรที่เสพติดอย่างอื่นแทนบุหรี่ไหมละ ? "
" หา ??? "
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THEY'RE BACK. AND NICER THAN EVER.
The 80s are running out of steam and fellow private eyes Healy and March are no different. Struggling to catch a serial killer and with Holly on the verge of leaving California, they'll have to come face to face with what they fear the most: the future.
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“He had a sharp nose and head with full, healthy hair, and was dressed in a white button-up shirt that looked crisp and too tight on his body, with slacks hanging low on narrow hips. There was stubble along his jaw and exhaustion beneath his eyes despite the well-kept mustache and soft blue tint of his irises, but somehow neither of those things took away from him. If anything, they added something unfairly charming. He smelled faintly of cheap cologne and cigarette smoke, and something sweeter underneath that reminded Healy vaguely of oranges.
Healy frowned when he noticed that the man’s blond hair was exactly the same shade of June’s usual beehive hairdo.”
Or
Four times Jackson Healy thought about kissing Holland March, and one time Holland March kissed him. (Plus one bonus chapter at the end)
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Tonight, too, is a repeat. Jacob sometimes wonders if God has already smited him and this is his personal circle of hell—one where he is made to commit sin upon sin, made to succumb to lust and homosexuality until he finds the strength to walk away.
Thus, he whispers not a prayer for protection, but a plea for forgiveness—for the scriptures have ridden the tides of history and translations and adaptations and yet there are only two absolutes: that Eve will always take a bite of the forbidden fruit, and that Jacob Palmer will always fall into Sebastian Wilder's bed.
Or: Jacob Palmer has an extreme case of religious guilt. This does not stop him from sleeping with Sebastian Wilder.
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“Do you really want that? For me to, uh, hit you?” He whispered the last part, keeping the scene calm. March was really starting to enjoy the feeling of his hand on his pant leg, against his thigh. It was so warm. Warmer than the coil in his gut from his bubbling arousal. He could barely speak. He lit up another cigarette, puffing with the only full breath he could conjure in the moment. Chest heaving and falling.
Fuck it.
Holland March drunkenly confesses that he wants Jackson Healy to hit him.
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If March had a nickel for every time Healy had walked in on him with his pants down, he'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it's happened twice.
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“Maybe ‘cause I’m a fuckup, and I’m- I’m a bad fucking detective, and a bad fucking dad, and a shitty person, okay, Healy? And-”
Healy’s hand was at his throat, now, just barely applying the faintest hint of pressure with his thumb pressed into his Adam's apple. March’s eyelashes fluttered.
Healy’s eyes were serious, genuine- “Jus’ start by being good for me, okay?”
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understand that it's the truth (i'd give it up for you) by Anonymous
Fandoms: The Nice Guys (2016)
28 May 2026
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"It’s gonna hurt. Just get to it.”
And that really brings Healy up short. Because once again, something has happened in March’s mind that he can’t understand. Or, at least, Healy hopes he doesn’t understand. Because if he does that’s somehow even worse.
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March hasn't had the best experiences with sex in the past. Healy sets out to change his mind.
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Holland March isn't in denial. He knows he likes men, okay? And he's fine with it, really, he is. Even if he doesn't exactly act on it that often.
But being attracted to Jackson fucking Healy? His business partner, housemate, and—let's face it—best friend, who's nearly two decades older than him? The ex-bruiser who was already kind of fat before he went and broke his leg and gained like thirty more pounds on top of it?
And what does it say about March that he wants Healy even more now?
Yeah, he thinks it's understandable to have a bit of a crisis about that.
(In other words: Holland "I didn't know I was into that" March learns several things about himself when he accepts that he wants to fuck that old man.)
Series
- Part 1 of they're not that nice
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you might be thinking too much about it, ever think about that? by Anonymous
Fandoms: The Nice Guys (2016)
25 May 2026
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But anyway the point is that the rest of his life blew up with his house. Their families came out to the funeral and, well, they didn't really get it. It wasn't simple to them. What could be more simple than Emma's name carved into stone, Holland isn't too sure, but it is what it is. They tried to get Holland sent to some hospital for queers and tried to take Holly from him and neither of those things happened, but he's never going to see his parents again or his brothers.
But now there's Healy.
Now, March has never felt this way about a man before and he got in his head about it for a while until he saw Healy knock out their client's soon-to-be ex-husband with one punch and then throw March over his shoulder like he was a half-empty sack of potatoes and his dormant and grieving libido woke up and went, "Okay, this one! It's this one! Gender is a social construct, as you very well know, and you want this one to rail you into next Sunday, please and thank you!"
so march has a vagina and everyone always makes that so complicated. he and his wife thought it was pretty simple, all things considered. maybe healy will too?
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Jackson turns away for a second to grab the collar out the box “Come here puppy, you gonna be a good boy? Speak.” March crawls forward, making a show of wiggling his hips as if he were wagging his tail “Ruff!” He approaches Healy who’s still sitting at the bar stool, he kneels back and places his hands on Healy’s knees, looking up at him through his lashes.
“Such a pretty puppy.” Healy praises and the words shoot straight to March’s pelvis, causing an involuntary twitch up. “Stay still, there you go.” He feels the weight of the leather collar fall across his neck, velvet soft and silky against the sensitive skin there. There’s a heavy click as it’s fastened in place, it hugs his throat perfectly, the pressure and weight grounding. The silver loop falls right at the base of his neck, cold and sending goosebumps across his chest. He hums contentedly, enjoying the feeling of being collared, his mind growing fuzzy.
Series
- Part 2 of Puppy!Holland March