18 Bookmarks by Procrastinationpowers
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“Good heavens,” Aziraphale tuts. “Carnal temptations and a vulgar mouth. Whatever will I do with you, my dear?”
Crowley’s mouth opens, but no words come forth. “Absolutely anything you like,” he rasps at length, blinking up at Aziraphale in a wonderstruck sort of way.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,637
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 321
- Kudos:
- 3,883
- Bookmarks:
- 823
- Hits:
- 53,147
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
23 Dec 2025
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Summary
“Should call you the Ottawa Puppies,” says the Toronto centre, Svensson. As an insult it makes no sense, so Ilya ignores it, until he continues, “Hear Hollander keeps you on a short leash.”
Ilya is the captain, so if anything, he should be holding the leash. In English, you can be singular or plural, but he knows what Svensson is trying to say. He is saying Ilya Rozanov, you are Hollander’s bitch.
“Only sometimes,” Ilya replies, grinning. He wins the face off.
OR: Ilya trains himself to be a very, very good guard dog for Shane.
Series
- Part 1 of Dog
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,424
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 11
- Comments:
- 817
- Kudos:
- 24,592
- Bookmarks:
- 4,691
- Hits:
- 173,732
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
22 Dec 2025
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Summary
It started with a power play. It ended with them on their knees. Seven sins. One Sheriff. One Mayor. No saints here.
A slow descent into obsession, filth, and feelings—told one sin at a time. A story in seven parts. Some pleasures aren’t holy.Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
16 Sep 2025
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If They Haven't Learned Your Name by silentwalrus
Fandoms: Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
16 Apr 2018
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Summary
Steve gets out of the hospital in two days, but just barely. “I’m fine,” he tells Sam, Nurse Eunjung and the phalanx of doctors assigned to make sure Captain America didn’t bleed out and die and get bad PR all over their nice clean hospital. “I have an advanced healing factor. It’s fine. See? I’m standing.”
“That is not standing,” Sam tells him.
“You’re bending the IV stand,” Nurse Eunjung adds pointedly. “Let go and sit down, they don’t grow on trees.”
aka Steve and Bucky's Global Honeymoon Revenge World Tour.Podfic of this story available by the incredible quietnight!
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 237,623
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 4,791
- Kudos:
- 9,476
- Bookmarks:
- 3,197
- Hits:
- 303,789
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
13 Feb 2025
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In the (Second) Beginning by cherryfeather
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
03 Jun 2019
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Summary
As their lunch stretches on Aziraphale slowly comes to realize that Crowley is—enjoying him. Enjoying Aziraphale’s conversation, and company, far more openly than he has in most of Aziraphale’s memory. And Aziraphale knows that he himself is just chattering on, letting conversational tangents carry him along, and—it’s definitely relief, for him, knowing for the first time in a long time that they aren’t being watched, that no one is keeping score for now.
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Aziraphale realizes that Crowley's been saying something rather loudly for a week.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,661
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 681
- Kudos:
- 40,536
- Bookmarks:
- 5,738
- Hits:
- 251,225
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
11 Aug 2023
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no place like home by dirgewithoutmusic for Elennare
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
10 Jul 2015
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Summary
When Petunia Dursley refused to take Harry in she forfeited his birthright protection, so Dumbledore took the baby to the safest place he knew: Hogwarts.
The applicable staff (mostly just… not Snape) took Harry in on a rotating schedule as he grew from baby to toddler to child. They traded extra credit for babysitting among the older students, and Harry grew up knowing a few dozen different laps that were safe and warm to nap in.
This was a Harry who grew up among books, among old transient walls and learned professors. They gave Binns night duty sometimes, and let him talk young Harry to sleep. This was a Harry whose world changed, on principle, daily. The stairs moved. The walls became doors. You had to keep your eyes open–you had to pay attention. So he did.
He grew up in a school. Knowledge was power, but knowledge was also joy. This was his sanctuary. There was magic in his world from birth.
Series
- Part 3 of boy with a scar
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,193
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 56
- Comments:
- 1,239
- Kudos:
- 25,777
- Bookmarks:
- 6,587
- Hits:
- 272,819
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
24 Oct 2016
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Five Things Adam Birkholtz Learns in HDFS 332: Healthy Couple Relationships by EllyAvon
Fandoms: Check Please! (Webcomic)
23 May 2016
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Summary
I give blanket permission for podfics and inspired-by works!
HDFS 332: Healthy Couple Relationships is just the night class Holster is taking with Lardo to fulfill one of his core requirements. He doesn't expect it to drastically change his life.
OR: The Weirdest Healthy Relationships PSA Ever.
OR: Wholesome Holsom
[HDFS Stands for Human Development and Family Science-- many schools still have CDFS departments (child instead of human) though they often also teach all kinds of development classes, including gerontology, aging, etc.]
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,117
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 924
- Kudos:
- 3,593
- Bookmarks:
- 774
- Hits:
- 25,721
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
20 Jun 2016
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Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
28 May 2016
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Summary
Shitty Knight takes a post-graduation road trip. Four friends, six thousand miles, two tents, several embarrassing photos, a giant rabbit, three cops, and a bear.
Series
- Part 1 of Road & Romance
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,786
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 652
- Kudos:
- 2,370
- Bookmarks:
- 696
- Hits:
- 27,201
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
29 Mar 2016
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Stupid States of Mind by orphan_account for Procrastinationpowers
Fandoms: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
28 Mar 2016
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Summary
Summary: In which, Dan is a smoking stranger and Phil really likes the rain.
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“Want to come over to mine?” Phil asks and he sees Dan jump, his muscles tightening.
“You don’t know me,” Dan murmurs, twisting the cigarette between his long fingers and Phil can’t look away.
“I want to.”
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Summary
Forced into a traumatizing situation that neither can control, Bucky and Steve have to confront their feelings for each other. It's a long road ahead...
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WARNING: Some dub-con activities up to about chapter 6 (from an outside source; neither Steve nor Bucky are the perpetrators). *WARNING TAG FOR NON-CON IS ONLY APPLICABLE UP TO CHAPTER 6. THERE IS NO RAPE IN THIS STORY.*
*UPDATE: A 21st chapter has been added with the entire playlist for this story. :)
Series
- Part 1 of Little Lies
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 228,713
- Chapters:
- 22/22
- Comments:
- 1,141
- Kudos:
- 2,632
- Bookmarks:
- 879
- Hits:
- 158,708
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
15 Jan 2016
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Salacious by Noccalula
Fandoms: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel (Comics), Hawkeye (Comics), Black Widow (Comics)
10 Aug 2016
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Summary
Natasha Romanov, Northeast Regional Manager of Salacious Adult Novelties LLC (Property of Tony Stark).
Full Definition of SALACIOUS
1
: arousing or appealing to sexual desire or imagination : lascivious
2
: lecherous, lustful
— sa·la·cious·ly adverb - Merriam-Webster Dictionary
— sa·la·cious·ness nounNatasha loves her job - it's everything else she's not really sure about. Nearly thirty, feeling rudderless, and in an increasingly grey-fuzzy, what-exactly-are-we-doing-here relationship with Clint Barton, Nat's taking stock of the shards of what she thought was expected of her, her poly-and-plentiful love (love?) life, and the ups, downs, upside downs, on tops and from behind's of running the prize jewel in Tony Stark's string of sex shops.
Alternately: How Wanda and Natasha Became Best Friends Selling Dildos
(Head's up - this is graphically, comically, unflinchingly, gynecologically sexual)
Series
- Part 1 of The Salacious Saga
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 48,626
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 254
- Kudos:
- 692
- Bookmarks:
- 110
- Hits:
- 28,917
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
01 Nov 2015
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Summary
After the events of Halloween 1981, Sirius Black finds himself raising Harry, with the assistance of Remus, in a world where Voldemort never disappears for 11 years.
Series
- Part 4 of Maddest House
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 42,687
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Comments:
- 251
- Kudos:
- 3,631
- Bookmarks:
- 1,173
- Hits:
- 100,809
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
23 Sep 2015
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Under(the)cover(s) by eiluned
Fandoms: The Avengers (2012), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel (Movies)
31 Mar 2013
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Summary
Undercover work leads to sexual frustration. Sexual frustration leads to rash decisions. Rash decisions lead to... well, relief of sexual frustration.
Series
- Part 6 of Troika
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,420
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 20
- Kudos:
- 497
- Bookmarks:
- 96
- Hits:
- 39,770
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
02 Jul 2015
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A Long Winter by dropdeaddream, WhatAreFears
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
17 Jun 2014
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Summary
In 1945, Steve Rogers jumps from a nosediving plane and swims through miles of Arctic Ocean to a frozen shore.
In 1947, Steve Rogers marries Peggy Carter.
In 1966, the New York Times finds the lost letters of Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes.
Series
- Part 1 of Not Easily Conquered
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,754
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 32
- Comments:
- 1,326
- Kudos:
- 18,433
- Bookmarks:
- 6,050
- Hits:
- 522,289
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
30 Apr 2015
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Summary
The many 'firsts' for Pedro Donaldson and Balthazar Jones (told through randomly prompted drabbles on Tumblr!)
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
30 Mar 2015
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Summary
Or, how Tony's manwhoring was finally duly appreciated.
There are too many pairings to list here. All team members/all team members. There is very little plot, but more smexings to make up for it ;)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,906
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 19
- Kudos:
- 750
- Bookmarks:
- 160
- Hits:
- 21,433
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
06 Feb 2015
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Summary
All Dean wants is a little privacy. Cas doesn't understand.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 94,118
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 4,553
- Kudos:
- 23,268
- Bookmarks:
- 5,857
- Hits:
- 569,901
Bookmarked by Procrastinationpowers
02 Feb 2015