PurplePatchwork
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This is the story of a man named the Narrator.
The Narrator was succesful at his job and perfectly content to go about life alone.
And then one day, something very peculiar happened.
Something that would forever change the Narrator.
The Narrator met a man named Stanley.
Series
- Part 12 of Love in audio
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When Kevin Price started university, there were three things he was absolutely certain about:
1. He'd get his degree in Economics and get a well-paying job in Sales, so he could buy a nice big house and settle down.
2. After university he'd find himself a wife to go live in said house and start a family with.
3. Kevin knows his place in the world.After getting roped into a Shakespeare play by his best friend and two overly enthusiastic theater kids, there are three things that Kevin is not certain about in the slightest:
1. Is becoming a Salesman just because his dad always told him he's good at telling people what they want to hear really the only way forward?
2. Why is he so sure he'd suddenly become interested in girls when he never was before?
3. Kevin knows jack-shit about fuck-all. He's a boy playing a girl playing a boy, who is starting to have feelings for another boy, and who might be a little more comfortable with the whole "gender is performance" thing than he ever thought possible. -
Kiss me under the... aloe vera? by PurplePatchwork
Fandoms: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
23 Nov 2025
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“Whose idea was it to hang up mistletoe?” Kevin asks, squinting up at the small bundle of greenery hanging in the doorway.
“Technically it’s aloe vera, not mistletoe.”
“Okay,” Kevin agrees, “whose idea was it to hang up aloe vera and have it function as mistletoe?”
They're celebrating Christmas, and there's aloe vera strung up all around the mission hut. Kevin thinks it's the perfect opportunity to try and steal a kiss from a certain district leader. The other elders think it's the perfect opportunity to try and steal a kiss from Kevin.
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meet me in the closet by PurplePatchwork
Fandoms: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
17 Nov 2025
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Kevin didn't mean to kiss Elder McKinley. It happened completely by accident. But now that he has, he thinks he'd like to do it again.
Or: the infamous lean-in, now turned lean-into, with spicy results.
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Connor is smiling. “Kevin Price, I have decided we are going to be good friends.”
Kevin smiles back. “Oh if you decided then I guess it’s just gonna have to be that way.”
Connor laughs, before swirling his chair around and returning to his journal.
Yes, good friends. And nothing more than that.
Connor's new roommate is exactly his type, and a fellow ex-Mormon to boot! Too bad he's straight. Connor has promised himself never to fall for another straight guy.
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The Size of Orlando, Florida by greerian
Fandoms: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
20 Nov 2015
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“What are you keeping from me?” Elder McKinley asks. “I’m supposed to be your district leader, Ke- Elder, and I have to say you’re making it darn near impossible. I try to ask how you’re doing, I try to show you I’m there for you, I try to make sure you feel valued and supported by m- us, and you just… run away! Every single time, Elder! I’ve had enough of it! I will not let you leave this room until you feel cared for.”
Kevin Price has everything under control... except for his inappropriate reaction to his district leader.
Series
- Part 1 of The Size of Orlando, Florida
Bookmarked by PurplePatchwork
25 Sep 2025
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“Now this may come as a shock to you, but there are whole religions built on stories. Can you imagine it, Stanley? My work—er, any person’s work becoming so integral, so monumental, that others can’t help but worship it? Live their very lives by it?” He gave a giddy sigh, and it seemed to envelop Stanley.
Sounds fake, but okay.
(Stanley tries to understand the Pink Room. The Narrator tells the story of a woman named Eve.)
Bookmarked by PurplePatchwork
04 Sep 2025
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Ask an Exec: How to Navigate Cultish Colleagues, Soul-Stealing Bosses, and the End of the World at Work by shinyopals
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
02 May 2023
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I've recently been unexpectedly promoted to lead a department in my organisation, wrote the anonymous emailer.
As there was no one working here when I arrived, my manager, who is head of the organisation, had promised me the choice of my own assistants. However, without warning, he simply presented me with an additional assistant. This new assistant’s first act on his first day was to let a dog into the office. It took several hours to catch and clean up after this dog and it has only been downhill from there. I admit I'm not entirely sure what to do with this assistant now I'm stuck with him. I'm hoping you have some advice?
Kind regards,
New ManagerAbigail Bailey runs a successful management advice blog. One frequent contributor is from a workplace with some... issues.
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Bookmarked by PurplePatchwork
21 Jul 2025
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After a century or so of swapping from body to body as circumstances demand, Jonah likes to think he’s ironed out the kinks in the process. But even he has to admit that this one has been something of a botch job.
Or: Jonah Magnus' Terrible-No-Good-Very-Bad-Day
Bookmarked by PurplePatchwork
04 Jul 2025
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Beholding the GDPR: How the Magnus Institute Updated Its Privacy Policy for the Twenty-First Century And Only Caused One Nervous Breakdown In The Process by shinyopals
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
18 May 2020
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I'm sure given your position you already know about the advent of the General Data Protection Regulation next year, wrote Peter Lukas, to Elias Bouchard. However, the Lukas family wishes to be crystal clear that our continued investment is contingent upon the Institute taking its responsibilities with regards to privacy and confidentiality seriously.
The Magnus Institute hires a Data Protection Officer. He sets about diligently booking in meetings, writing policy documents, and training all the staff in the importance of confidentiality. Now if only he could get hold of the Head Archivist, who seems to have vanished again...
(Jon is only trying to save the world, but apparently some people think he should still be doing his day job.)
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Bookmarked by PurplePatchwork
02 Jul 2025