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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “I am stuck in your orbit,” Crowley said. “I’ve no intention and no desire to go anywhere else.”

    or: after a tryst in rome, crowley and aziraphale realize their corporations aren't exactly designed to be together. that's nothing a good five thousand years of practice sex can't fix.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,280
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    132
    Kudos:
    1,984
    Bookmarks:
    496
    Hits:
    14,181

    11 Oct 2019

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Crowley laughed. “I thought you’d have realized by now. I am no ordinary king.”

    “No,” Aziraphale said. “You certainly are not.”

    or: aziraphale is sent as a gift to the southern king to smooth over trade negotiations. they both find themselves in over their heads.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    61,754
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    7
    Comments:
    468
    Kudos:
    3,268
    Bookmarks:
    875
    Hits:
    45,741

    26 Sep 2019

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    For three centuries, Crowley has been reincarnated over and over as a human with no memory of his past. Aziraphale has tried to find a way to restore him to his true self, but all he seems to do is hurt them both. This time, he only means to steal a brief moment when he walks into Crowley's flower shop. But Crowley can't let it go...

    Words:
    65,836
    Works:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    5,062

    22 Sep 2019

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Sometimes, a family is a demonic nanny, an angelic cook, and a kid who isn't actually the Antichrist.

    Or: Crowley helps Aziraphale secure a different position at the Dowling Estate.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,029
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    496
    Kudos:
    7,056
    Bookmarks:
    2,222
    Hits:
    59,820

    15 Sep 2019

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    CROWLEY: I try not to make a habit of gratitude, but I must give our appreciation to everyone out there who’s been listening and subscribing to The Ineffable Plan.
    AZIRAPHALE: Ooh, yes, we’ve become quite popular, haven’t we?
    CROWLEY: Yeah, just hit number eight on the advice charts … No advertising at all.
    AZIRAPHALE: Mm. How … miraculous.
    CROWLEY: … Aziraphale. You did not.

     

    ***

    Crowley and Aziraphale are very possibly the people least qualified, on the entire planet, to start up an advice podcast.

    But what else is there to do when the world isn’t ending anytime soon, you’re technically on indefinite sabbatical from your lifelong careers, and you need a plausible excuse to spend more time with your best friend who you’re definitely not, absolutely not, maybe just a little, actually maybe overwhelmingly in love with?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,541
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    9
    Comments:
    1,172
    Kudos:
    21,443
    Bookmarks:
    5,748
    Hits:
    138,580

    06 Sep 2019

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    He would Fall if he succumbed to this. Demonic temptation or not, Aziraphale was certain this would end him. He couldn’t consent to such an act, couldn’t willingly hand himself over to be despoiled by a fiend.

    Ah, there’s the loophole.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,017
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    361
    Kudos:
    3,342
    Bookmarks:
    687
    Hits:
    46,116

    05 Sep 2019

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    Jesus fucking Christ, he’s in love with Crowley.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,048
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    8
    Comments:
    771
    Kudos:
    11,582
    Bookmarks:
    3,139
    Hits:
    133,811

    02 Sep 2019

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "You seem very familiar to me. I can’t say why that is." As Aziraphale spoke, Crowley turned away from the fire, and Aziraphale was momentarily concerned that the spell had been broken, that he had crossed some invisible line. But Crowley smiled and brought his beer to his lips.

    "Maybe we met in a past life. Does your lot believe in that?"

    "Past lives?"

    "Yeah."

    Aziraphale smiled into his wine. He was sure Crowley was poking fun, ever so slightly, but he liked it. "Not strictly speaking. No."

    Crowley shrugged, taking another long sip of his beer. “A mystery then."

    After receiving direct instruction from God, village reverend Aziraphale leaves his countryside congregation to serve the underserved and in-need at an urban church in London, a transition made all the more complicated by the mysterious and handsome Crowley, who always seems to appear when Aziraphale least expects him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    51,968
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    8
    Comments:
    979
    Kudos:
    3,055
    Bookmarks:
    772
    Hits:
    41,846

    29 Aug 2019

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Good heavens,” Aziraphale tuts. “Carnal temptations and a vulgar mouth. Whatever will I do with you, my dear?”

    Crowley’s mouth opens, but no words come forth. “Absolutely anything you like,” he rasps at length, blinking up at Aziraphale in a wonderstruck sort of way.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,637
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    319
    Kudos:
    3,834
    Bookmarks:
    821
    Hits:
    52,028

    27 Aug 2019

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    They confessed their love to each other after the world didn't end, but they haven't been physical at all. Crowley's perfectly content with this, overjoyed at anything and everything he gets from Aziraphale, but Aziraphale admits that he'd been getting over Heaven's touch-starved environment, and he wants very badly to touch Crowley. A lot of fluff and romance ensues, as well as a lot of touching. Service top Aziraphale, mouthy bottom Crowley, light spanking and hairpulling, and so much ineffable love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,800
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    47
    Kudos:
    1,660
    Bookmarks:
    205
    Hits:
    20,263

    16 Aug 2019

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Aziraphale identifies as a gay male, if a human is asking, as it’s the truest approximation of his general preferences. But of course though he’s gotten rather accustomed to a male gender, he only bothers with a physical sex when he and Crowley are interested in making use of it, and though his brief dalliances with humans, unlike Crowley, have extended only to those who identify as male, ultimately, his sexuality is firmly, helplessly, exclusively Crowley.

    She’s a woman less and less often these days, and Aziraphale understands without asking that it’s because humanity got far worse about womanhood a few thousand years ago, the danger a pressing thing. She does it for tempting, and when she feels safe enough to do it without a hassle, and when she wants it, when they’re alone.

    Like tonight.

    "no matter what you do, no matter the way you let the light of this earth hit you, I am so in love with you.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,674
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    52
    Kudos:
    1,108
    Bookmarks:
    200
    Hits:
    8,554

    16 Aug 2019

  12. This has been deleted, sorry!

    16 Aug 2019

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Crowley sleeps for five days, eats pancakes, and is brave enough for both of them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,339
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    277
    Kudos:
    4,265
    Bookmarks:
    986
    Hits:
    36,242

    15 Aug 2019

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    After the crêpes, Crowley helps Aziraphale get his clothing back. Then he helps a bit more.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,097
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    209
    Kudos:
    4,498
    Bookmarks:
    1,007
    Hits:
    42,984

    12 Aug 2019

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Crowley lets slip that he knows a certain something about Aziraphale. He seems to think it's important; Aziraphale doesn't understand why. Until he does.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,325
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    259
    Kudos:
    8,141
    Bookmarks:
    1,005
    Hits:
    75,992

    08 Aug 2019

  16. This has been deleted, sorry!

    08 Aug 2019

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    After they get together Aziraphale has some lingering Ideas about his brief stint in the Bastille; Crowley is happy to help him explore them. Hijinks, as they say, ensue.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,252
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    295
    Kudos:
    3,170
    Bookmarks:
    721
    Hits:
    31,918

    07 Aug 2019

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "Yes, exactly. Retire." Aziraphale reaches for the last remaining tartlet brimming with summer berries. "Somewhere along the south coast, perhaps."

    Or: Crowley and Aziraphale learn to move in tandem.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,113
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    709
    Kudos:
    5,888
    Bookmarks:
    1,883
    Hits:
    48,992

    31 Jul 2019

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    He hadn’t expected a sudden lapful of angel.

    “Very sorry about this,” Aziraphale said, and kissed him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,400
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,115
    Kudos:
    31,585
    Bookmarks:
    7,258
    Hits:
    318,038

    29 Jul 2019

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Weakly, Crowley’s eyes flickered down, and he saw the angel blushing, as if now, suddenly, of all things, he had succumbed to reticence. He was sat back on his knees, and the soft accordion folds of him were dewy with sweat and moonlight.

    Or: as in all things, Aziraphale indulges.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,947
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    390
    Kudos:
    3,305
    Bookmarks:
    700
    Hits:
    48,260

    28 Jul 2019

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