sbeachnz



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    The biggest lies are usually the ones we tell ourselves, and Steve has been telling lots of lies, especially lately. That in spite of how he can’t stop chewing his fingernails bloody, the never ending nightmares chasing him out of bed, and the way merely seeing ice sends him into a panic, he’s fine.

    But when his latest mission with The Avengers goes horribly wrong, Steve can no longer keep lying, not even to himself.

    Diagnosed with PTSD and placed on medical leave, initially Steve is resentful, stubbornly refusing the idea there’s anything that can make it better. Until Sam suggests a Service Dog, and introduces him to James Buchanan Barnes, a fellow vet and trainer who swears one of his dogs can help, if only Steve can summon enough bravery to take a leap of faith and accept a four-legged companion in his life.

    What follows is a long and winding journey of fear, doubt and self-recrimination. But also hope, acceptance and redefining what it means to be a hero, as Steve finally faces the issues that have been haunting him his entire life.

    There is also a lot of fur, conversations with dogs, and a cross-country road trip, as Steve rebuilds his life and maybe, just maybe, falls in love along the way.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    216,571
    Chapters:
    48/48
    Comments:
    4,686
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    1,685
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    08 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Steve can’t remember a time when someone’s touch had been more than perfunctory. A hand to his arm, moving him into the correct position. An arm around his shoulders, blocking him from a hit. He can’t remember the last time that someone touched him for the sake of the contact; because Steve deserved gentle things.

    In a big, bright, lonely new world, Steve finds solace in a hair salon.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,748
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    192
    Kudos:
    821
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    122
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    7,236

    19 Feb 2022

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    The tale of what happens when bakery owner Steve Rogers employs one ex-assassin, accidentally befriends two more, wins a tamagotchi war, and somehow gets upgraded from cat-sitter to boyfriend.

    AKA; The Bakery AU nobody asked for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    54,362
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    476
    Kudos:
    911
    Bookmarks:
    239
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    18,724

    09 Feb 2022

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You have never once been careful in your entire life.” Bucky huffs out a laugh. He looks away. “Maybe I’m offended you didn’t think to ask me.” He says it like a joke, but he can’t bring himself to laugh again.

    “Bucky,” Steve says, scandalized. “You’re my friend. I’m not gonna use you to experiment sexually.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    66,593
    Chapters:
    25/25
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    1,587
    Kudos:
    10,427
    Bookmarks:
    2,764
    Hits:
    197,550

    05 Feb 2022

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Steve used to have dreams of a life after war. There had been a couple in France, married resistance fighters who shared their bed and their souls with him. Maybe they could've been that life if things had turned out differently.

    But they hadn't, and Steve is starting to realize that if he wants an "after war," he's going to have to create it for himself.

    It starts with a queer bookstore and a tattoo honoring Arnie's legacy. It ends, hopefully, with Bucky Barnes and a new dream for a future.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,692
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    123
    Kudos:
    659
    Bookmarks:
    180
    Hits:
    4,703

    10 Dec 2021