Prompts for Schitt’s Creek Sports Fest
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These sports would normally play on ESPN 3 or other small market stations - Roller Derby, Bowling, Scrabble Tournaments, Spelling Bees, Billiards/Pool, Frisbee, hacky sack, beer pong, beer olympics, jello wrestling, competitive knitting.
Your submission for this prompt can be fully in an Alternate Universe, just canon divergent or fully canon compliant. For example:
College AU with some beer pong/hacky sack/jello wrestling shenanigans?
Meet ugly on opposite bowling teams?
The Schitt's Creek Adult Spelling Bee to Benefit the random charity of your choice?
Stevie Budd and the impressive roller derby team of the Schitt Heads road trip to Beast of the East in Montreal?
If you can count points, it's a sport!
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After Stevie discovers David's secret bowling talent, she cons him into joining her league. Enter Patrick: cocky, teasing, inconveniently attractive.
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Creekside Brewing Company: Brewed by Brewers! (“Oh my god. Please don’t put that on Instagram.”)
Canon divergence in which Patrick follows his cousins to Schitt’s Creek to help launch Creekside Brewing Co. But when he discovers that the neighbouring business is also set to open its doors soon, it will take him down a path he never expected.
Or
A story about changing your dreams, a beautiful boy, and a little bit of beer pong.
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When a dance studio moves in across the street from Patrick's Brooklyn apartment he starts second guessing, well, everything. The ballet teacher he can see dancing from his living room window definitely has nothing to do with it.
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Schitt's Creek starts up its own bowling league, and it's only a matter of time before David gets pulled in.
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A collection of miscellaneous trading cards,
An assortment of sports and games,
A sprinkling of our favourite characters.
Catch 'em all! -
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“I signed us up for a bowling league.”
David nearly dropped the slice of pizza he’d been eating as he whipped his head to the side to look at his husband, who was gazing at him expectantly, as if he thought he’d just delivered good news.
“You… what?” David lowered the slice of pizza to his plate, just to ward off any further chances of catastrophe, as he felt his entire face -- brows, nose, and mouth -- begin to pinch together into an expression of extreme confusion mixed with mild disgust. “Someone must have put some magic mushrooms on this pizza, because I could have sworn I just heard you say that you signed us up for a bowling league.”
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Every time Alexis comes back into town, Patrick wants everyone to play MarioKart together. David likes it more than he expects.
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Ballet has been at the center of Alexis’ life since she was three years old, the first time she saw New York City Ballet perform The Nutcracker. She pulled on her mother’s sleeve, much to Moira’s displeasure, pointed at the stage, and said, “Me!” It was the very first time she felt like her mother saw her. That feeling was intoxicating enough that she couldn’t help but chase it.
She’s seen some of the world's most celebrated ballerinas perform. But she’s never seen anyone dance like this girl, whose name she doesn’t know. The stage lights turn her auburn hair burning red. Her pirouettes are perfectly landed; there’s no struggle at all in the way her leg lifts behind her in attitude to tap against the tambourine she holds above her head. As she flits across the stage, her tambourine extended toward the judges like an irresistible invitation, there is something real in her smile, something seductive in her eyes.
Alexis forgets to breathe.
Ballet AU.
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There’s a tree line twenty feet up the shore, and he drags himself there to get under the shade of a tree before the sun gets strong.
Just before he passes out, he sees what looks like a building off in the distance, but before he can consider what it might be, he’s asleep.
He sleeps so deeply, he never hears the screams.
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Patrick, an accomplished hunter, heads off on an around-the-world trip in search of answers and excitement.
He gets more than he bargained for. -
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“Did — did you hear what I said,” he asks after counting to ten one more time in his head. He’s not annoyed — he’s not. It's only the second time Patrick has done this, stepping in to DM because Jocelyn and Roland are on vacation.
Patrick looks up and nods. “Yeah. I’m just waiting for you to make an actual playable move.”
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David is in color guard and may or may not have a tiny little barely-there crush on one Patrick Brewer, Cheerleader. When Patrick asks him to be his (fake) business partner for a school project AND hang out at the homecoming dance, David must figure out how to overcome his own knack for screwing everything up before he, well, screws everything up. With a halftime performance, a $100 Café Tropical gift card, and a sweet boy’s heart on the line, David can’t afford to lose this one.
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Hanging on, white knuckle grip by yourbuttervoicedbeau (kiwiana)
Fandoms: Schitt's Creek
28 Jul 2020
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David glances over at him with a quick but genuine grin, and Patrick is taken aback by how much it lights up his face.
Which is… a weird thing to think about your pole instructor. -
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David Rose needs a sixth person for ultimate (trivia) game play. Enter Patrick Brewer.
It's two smart idiots falling in love.
[Podfic of The More You Know, written by Likerealpeopledo]
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An axe throwing meet cute for two men in which one is starting a business and the other is starting his life anew in Schitt's Creek.
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David has strong feelings about the street hockey game in front of his house and even stronger feelings about one of the players.
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These sports require freezing temperatures or refrigerated buildings to compete in. Curling, Skiing (all varieties), snowboarding (all varieties), skating (speed and figure - individual and pairs), bobsleigh, luge, skeleton, snowball fights?
Your submission for this prompt can be fully in an Alternate Universe, just canon divergent or fully canon compliant. For example:
Patrick and Ronnie's sports feud seeps into their respective curling teams in the winter?
Alexis and David Rose - figure skaters as groomed by Moira Rose who are heading to the Olympics?
A ski trip for our Schitt's Creek friends?
Go wild with all the options available to you.
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These Sporting Events My Boyfriend Insists on Taking Me To by DoubleL27 for houdini74, FormerlyEmu, missgeevious
Fandoms: Schitt's Creek
29 Jul 2020
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“Umm, what are those and why are they assaulting my eyes at this ungodly hour?”
“Curling pants,” Patrick tells him, pressing a kiss to David’s temple, “and it’s seven-thirty.”
“Curling pants?” David asks, as he blinks at his boyfriend, who joined a league of yet another sporting event about a month ago.
“For the bonspiel, today.”
“That’s today?”
OR the Curling Sequel to the Kiss Cam AU
Series
- Part 2 of Just Play AU
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it’s right in front of me so there’s no reason to pretend by inmoonlightigetseasick
Fandoms: Schitt's Creek
27 Jul 2020
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Blades hissing against ice, beating a steady rhythm to the echoing Vivaldi track. The arena lights dancing off of pink sequinned fabric. The blur of Alexis skating past him. The rush of air in her wake. His thundering heart calmed by the composure on her face, and the twitch in his eyebrows, making sure his expression matched.
This was David’s world. It was what he knew best.
This was their final practice for the 2021 Canadian Championships, which, if they won, would mean their third national title: the final step to make their Olympic dreams come true. David wasn’t even thinking as he let his body fall into the grooves of the routine, practiced a thousand times. All they had left to go was one simultaneous double-axel, then a lift, and finally their signature move. Like clockwork, at this part David’s palms would start to sweat in anticipation. Not like, a disgusting amount, but a normal, totally reasonable amount for the amount of pressure they were under.
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David and Alexis are Canada's golden figure skating duo. When their Olympic dreams are unexpectedly halted, they have to pick up the pieces, fall apart, and grow together, and maybe find love along the way.
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David's saved a special something in his box full of hockey pucks.
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Patrick Brewer: sexy, sensitive, ski instructor. David Rose: reluctant pupil.
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Aquatics by Anonymous
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05 Jun 2020
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If it involves water, you can find it here. Swimming, Diving, Rowing, Canoeing, surfing, Sailing, water polo.
Your submission for this prompt can be fully in an Alternate Universe, just canon divergent or fully canon compliant. For example:
Ted and Mutt as rival surfers competing in a high stakes tournament?Alexis commandeering a sailboat and piloting hostages to safety?
The rowing team David Rose is on has a new coxswain who looks like he might sink the boat with his tree trunk legs?
A canoe-camping trip that somehow many people got roped in on but David just wants a parasol and to be in the middle of a park?
Or any other idea you have. So many options, so little time!
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White water rafting in Jackson Hole, Wyoming is big business. Experienced guides, ones like Patrick Brewer with several years' guide experience, swift water training, and EMT skills are in high demand.
After leaving everything he knew and everyone he loved behind in Toronto, Patrick has spent the past six years building his reputation and his skills as a white-water guide. It's easy to get lost in the landscape and high-mountain life of Jackson Hole, Wyoming.
He rarely takes guests on "floats" anymore, but when Ronnie called in sick because her head was "feeling swimmy" (there's a euphemism for got drunk and got laid if he'd ever heard one), their boss came looking for Patrick. It's now his job to float a trio of "elite guests" down the river so some hot-shot photographer can take pics of a reality television star.
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“Canoeing???” David’s voice goes up an octave.
At this point the only person left in the entry way is pale boy with auburn hair, wearing a baseball-style shirt with blue sleeves. He’s unlacing some sturdy looking mountaineering-type shoes, and looks back at David. His smile is much kinder than Stevie’s, but his eyes are just as wide.
“Yup, canoeing.” He parrots back at him.
(This is not your average high school AU.)
Series
- Part 1 of Not Your Average High School AU
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These sports are primarily played during the summer and have a seat at the summer olympics, or do not rely on it being winter to be completed (minus the aquatic ones) are found here. Equestrian, Archery, Cycling, Track and Field, Fencing, Gymnastics, Martial Art forms, trampolining, shooting, skateboarding, weightlifting and many more!
Your submission for this prompt can be fully in an Alternate Universe, just canon divergent or fully canon compliant. For example:
David faces off against his fiercest fencing competition yet?
Twyla's amazing skill as a markswoman?
Alexis's adventures with equestrian categories at the Olympics?
Ted and his NOT LITTLE benching ability?
Stevie as a world champion skateboarder at the X Games?
Let your imagination run wild!
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"When you said your sister would be here I thought she'd be a spectator like us, not a competitor."
or Alexis is an Olympic rhythmic gymnast and Stevie is very gay
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The postcard was sitting on the corner of the desk under a paper products catalog for a few days before David noticed it.
“Elmdale Valley Entrepreneurs Golf Outing” David said quietly to himself as he flipped the card over in his hand.
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David & Patrick discover new things about each other and themselves thanks to a charity golf match. ⛳ -
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Patrick suggests a little friendly competition to alleviate some pandemic stress.
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These sports have massive national and global reach, with huge followings and major airtime across television networks as well as companies clamoring for spokespeople from these sports: Football(Soccer), Cricket, Rugby, Boxing, Hockey (ice and field), MotorSports, Baseball, Tennis, Basketball, American Football.
Your submission for this prompt can be fully in an Alternate Universe, just canon divergent or fully canon compliant. For example:
That time Alexis had to win a Formula 1 race to escape a drug cartel?
Patrick Brewer, pro-hockey star?
Ronnie Lee's athletic park restored for intramural tennis games?
The continued war between Cafe Tropical and Bob's Garage?
Meet Cute at a Toronto Raptors game?
The world is your oyster.
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1 anonymous claimants
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David knew it was going to happen, one day he would have to meet Patrick's parents, but it still takes him by surprise when it does, when they insist on getting to know David. What really shocks him, is how well it all goes.
Snipe: A sweet shot that beats the goalie.
Or hockey bfs, but the one where David meets the Brewers
Series
- Part 4 of Score
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So if Patrick wanted to spend time with him watching a baseball game, David would happily cheer on the players in a game he knew nothing about. If it would make Patrick smile, if it would allow them to spend time together outside of work, he would do it without question.
Patrick has a baseball viewing party, and David has a lot of feelings.
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David loves the fall. Snuggling into his favorite sweaters against the crisp morning air. The warm sunlight slanting though the windows of the store in the afternoon. Hot chocolate in the evenings.
However, he wasn’t thrilled with Patrick’s new addition to this fall.
Patrick started a fantasy (American) football league, which was turning fall into spreadsheets and statistics and a whole new roster of names and sports terms. Not to mention spending Sundays watching football, when there were many, many more fun things they could be doing on their day off.
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there’s a lot of us, i think we’re all all right by ships_to_sail
Fandoms: Schitt's Creek
28 Jul 2020
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“I’m Stevie Budd,” she steps closer and Twyla catches the soft smell of baby powder, lavender, sweat and cut grass. It’s delicious, and for a split second Twyla wants to ask her how she smells so good after all that practice, but before she can, Stevie asks, “you can’t read, can you?”
And Twyla’s officially been found out. She presses her lips together and nods and it’s nothing, but it’s enough that Twyla doesn’t miss the ripple of noise that passes through the crowd of girls sitting on the ground, standing in the red dirt along the foul line. She doesn’t miss the way Stevie cuts the crowd a look, the way the noise seems to lessen slightly, but it doesn’t stop the tears from welling to the brims of her eyelids, her nose warm and itchy as she forces herself to stare at the ground.
“Hey, hey,” Stevie says, and she puts a hand on Twyla’s shoulder, it’s warm weight a welcome sensation to the cool flush Twyla feels, even in the midafternoon sun. “It’s alright. We just need to…” she trails off and starts to drag a finger down the list, making it about two-thirds of the way down before her finger stops on one of the lines of letters. “Here. This is you. ‘Twyla Sands’. You made it, you’re a Peach like me.”
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David considered Patrick a calm, rational, level-headed guy, but when it came to the baseball, Patrick kept trying to prove him wrong.
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Ronnie is determined to have amazing footage of Cafe Tropical and Patrick Brewer's awesome defeat once she realizes that David Rose is their substitution for Twyla. Ray has a business idea.
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You know what's really great? Having a boyfriend at summer camp. You know what's not great? Trying to play sports in front of him. Especially when you HATE SPORTS like David Rose hates sports.
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David and Patrick go to a Leafs game while in Toronto for the weekend.
(Title is from All or Nothing by Theory of a Deadman)
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Here is a short little fic about cricket. Don’t worry, you don’t actually need to know anything about cricket to read it. Or so I’m told.
Written for the prompt: Ray explains cricket to Patrick, but Patrick still prefers Baseball, and Ray has feelings about that.
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Artwork: Cardstock cutout baseball card of Patrick Brewer
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