AccidentalAssassinAcquisition



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  1. Public Bookmark *

    Haunted by

    Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Superman (Movie 2025), The Batman (Movie 2022)  

    01 Aug 2025

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    "Luthor stole some Wayne Tech technology to build portals and... Sorry, but do you know there's a flying sheet behind you?"

    Bruce turned around immediately. There was a sheet suspended in mid-air, floating as if there was a breeze pushing it, even though the windows were all closed.

    He had to thank the constant half-light at the manor and the distance that did not make Gordon see well that it was not a floating sheet, but a man wrapped in a sheet, blissfully asleep and unaware of the chaos he was causing.

    Clark had warned him about some of his sleep problems.

    Bruce had to come up with a story on the fly for the commissioner, and quickly.

    "My house is haunted," Bruce quietly told the commissioner, without batting an eyelid.

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    Bookmarked by AccidentalAssassinAcquisition

    12 Oct 2025

  2. Rec *

    Mission: seducing Superman by

    Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, The Batman (Movie 2022), Superman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), DCU, DCU (Comics)  

    03 Sep 2024

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    "Let me get this straight…you, mister, I don't look anyone in the face and if you talk to me for more than five minutes I'll start crying, you want….I can't believe I'm about to say it…learn how to seduce a man."

    "Exactly," Bruce replied, as he petted one of Selina's cats.

    " Why?"

    "Who cares?" Harley broke in.

    "He finally wants to step outside his boundaries! You have my respect!"

    "It's not about going outside my boundaries. It's about planetary security."

    "Really?" Selina said, half joking.

    "Superman is powerful enough to destroy the planet. I have to find how to stop him."

    This knocked Harley over, and Pamela finally stopped pretending not to pay attention.

    Selina didn't know whether to laugh hysterically or slap him on the head.

    Language:
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    Bookmarked by AccidentalAssassinAcquisition

    12 Oct 2025

  3. Rec 6

    The Avian Adopter by

    Fandom: A Series of Unfortunate Events (TV), A Series of Unfortunate Events - Lemony Snicket, Batman - All Media Types, Batman: The Audio Adventures (Podcast)

    26 Jun 2025

    Words:
    9,873
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Bookmarked by AccidentalAssassinAcquisition

    10 Oct 2025

  4. Public Bookmark 62

    Babygirl by

    Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics), The Batman (Movie 2022)  

    06 Sep 2025

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    "Father, why did Superman call you babygirl?"
    His father stopped mid-belt-fastening. Richard chuckled from the backseat and swore he'd said "he got you, old man."

    He frowned at the disrespect, but his father showed no sign of hearing. In fact, he didn't seem very present.

    He spoke again, "Father, I asked..."

    "I heard you," his father said, interrupting him, his cheeks slightly red, probably from the heat of the evening's patrol. "You...when did you hear us talking?"

    "Before the car arrived. You were murmuring among yourselves. The alien was unusually close, way too close," he said, pouting, not understanding why he felt this way. "And he muttered things. Babygirl is the only thing I understood. So, what it means? It's an insult?"

     

    (Bruce regrets all his life choices, while Dick is just enjoying his father's humiliation.)

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    08 Oct 2025

  5. Rec 34

    Special training by

    Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), The Batman (Movie 2022), Superman (Movie 2025)  

    27 Sep 2025

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    Summary

    "Why did you want to do it?" Superman asked, looking around at the new training room, the equipment and the mats that reminded him all too much of those used when he used to take Lois to yoga.

     

    "I’ve seen some videos of you and your team," Batman pursed his lips (cute!) as he said it. He was like Kendra; she would always refuse to use the name Justice Gang, finding it ridiculous. "You’re strong…"

    "Oh well, thanks…"

    "But you don’t know how to fight."

     

    (Clark thought he knew how to fight. He also thought he was 100% straight. Batman proves him wrong for both of them.)

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    08 Oct 2025