ColorMeParanoid
Fandoms
- 9-1-1 (TV) (44)
- Shadowhunters (TV) (20)
- 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020) (14)
- Teen Wolf (TV) (5)
- Interview with the Vampire (TV 2022) (4)
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Summary
And because he was so busy shamelessly ogling the poor man, it took him an embarrassingly long amount of time to catch up with the fact that it wasn’t the whole room that was lit up. It was just him, standing under a spotlight and everyone else in the room was now looking at him expectantly as the song continued to play, something about riding and ponies that had nothing to do with actual horses.
Feeling like a star in a B-tier horror movie, Alec slowly turned his head to look behind him, hoping against all hope that they were all looking at something other than him. And there, like a scene from his worst nightmares, he noticed it for the first time.
A silver pole. One made for dancing to the raunchy music that was still blaring from some hidden speaker. Perfect for a stripper that Ragnor had thought he’d poached from a nightclub as a surprise for his friend’s birthday.
Well, Alec thought as all color drained from his face, it was safe to say that when Ragnor said that he was throwing a surprise party, the last thing Alec expected was being said surprise.
Or, the one in which Alec gets mistaken for a stripper
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Buck groaned as Eddie leaned a bit too far back, pressing his body fully against Buck’s own but before he could apologize, he felt a familiar shape pressed against his lower back. “I thought you said you didn’t have your flashlight on you.”
“What are you on about? I don’t have a-“
It seemed to be attached to Buck’s belt so he just groped it for a second, trying to figure out how to get it off when Buck’s entire body went rigid and he realized that the item he was holding didn’t exactly feel like a flashlight was supposed to. It was in a similar shape, sure, and it was hard but it wasn’t metal hard and he’d certainly never in his life encountered a flashlight that twitched under his grip. Or one that felt so warm to the touch.
“That’s not my flashlight,” Buck informed him in a strangled voice and Eddie went rigid too as the realization sank in. It was Buck’s cock. He was shamelessly groping Buck’s cock.
Or, the one in which Buck and Eddie get stuck in a hole
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The front door swung open and Eddie stepped out in all of his annoyed glory. “Buck, what’s taking so- oh,” he said, his face scrunched up like he’d just smelled something bad.
“Oh,” Tommy echoed, the smile on his face freezing into a pained grimace as the dots in his mind started to connect.
“What are you doing here?” Eddie demanded, arms crossed over his chest.
“He came to check on me. See how I was doing after the whole ‘Bobby is back from the dead’ thing,” Buck was quick to explain, since Tommy’s brain was still too busy rebooting. “Isn’t that nice?”
If anything, that set Eddie off even more. “What, and he couldn’t do that over the phone?”
Or, the one in which Tommy finds out Eddie's back from Texas
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he's got a key to my heart (and my handcuffs) by ColorMeParanoid
Fandoms: Teen Wolf (TV)
23 Apr 2025
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Experimenting while single required creativity, which Stiles had in abundance. What he severely lacked in, however, was patience. And Stiles had done a lot of stupid things in his lifetime, but as he tugged uselessly at the handcuffs that kept him chained to his bed by his rapidly bruising wrist, he couldn’t deny that this had to be one of the stupidest ones to date.
Especially when there was a loud, thundering knock on his door and a deep, male voice called out the words, “Fire department!”
God, what an absolute nightmare this day had turned out to be.
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“Daniel Molloy, I presume?” Lestat said and god, even his voice was sexy. Deeper than expected and that stupid accent was doing it for him, too. Jesus. If he were a couple of decades younger and far less wise, he’d go crawling back to him, too.
But he did have some self respect left, as well as a functional, if occasionally wonky self preservation instinct so when Lestat’s amused smirk reminded him of the fact that the bastard was prying into his every thought and probably having a good ol’ laugh about this old pervert daydreaming about licking him, he locked those thoughts down the way Louis taught him and gathered his composure.
“Your eyes are very blue,” he blurted out like a besotted fucking idiot.
Well. At least he tried.
Or, the one in which Daniel calls Lestat to come get his brooding husband out of his apartment and finally meets him in the process
Recent series
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the mortifying ordeal of being known by ColorMeParanoid
Fandom Interview with the Vampire (TV 2022)
07 Dec 2024
- Words:
- 27,864
- Works:
- 2
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- Words:
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- Works:
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Recent bookmarks
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the heart is hard to translate (it has a language of its own) by pageandpetals
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
17 Mar 2026
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Summary
“Hey,” Hollander says softly, settling a hand on Ilya’s back.
Ilya turns away and fixes his gaze on a spot of chipped paint on the wall, trying to will the moisture trailing down his cheeks back into his tear ducts. “Sorry,” he whispers, shaking his head.
He can’t actually remember the last time he felt so utterly mortified. This is not at all what he’d envisioned happening when Hollander asked for his room number. He’d guessed that a conversation was on the horizon; Ilya had just imagined it happening after he reminded Hollander exactly what he’d been missing while he was off being Rose Landry’s boyfriend. But no, Hollander always wants to clear the air, always needs to fucking talk, even though Ilya never has the right words for him.
“Hey,” Hollander says again, somehow even more tenderly.
The bed shifts, and suddenly Hollander is crawling into Ilya’s lap and cradling Ilya’s face in his hands and kissing him.
—
(or, filling in the blanks between Ilya crying in Shane's arms and the bed being absolutely wrecked in the last shot of that scene)
Series
- Part 3 of hr/gc hollanov fics
Bookmarked by ColorMeParanoid
13 Apr 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
the heart is hard to translate (it has a language of its own) by pageandpetals
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loving you's my only house by probablylily for fiend-for-culture (caspian)
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
02 Feb 2026
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Summary
"Always like this." Ilya doesn't know the best way to put this. English words clunky on his tongue. "Pretty eyes fill up with tears for me."
Shane's lips part in surprise. Ilya wants to push a finger between them, watch his cheeks hollow out around it, but Shane recovers quickly, mouth flattening before Ilya has a chance.
"It's—it's a normal response," he says, defensive. "Sometimes peoples' eyes water because of, because of the stimulation." Shane winces. "Or… you know what I mean."
"Oh, yes." Ilya grins. "The stimulation makes all parts of you wet."
"Oh, god, Rozanov. That's gross."
———
Ilya's obsessed with seeing Shane cry.Bookmarked by ColorMeParanoid
31 Mar 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
loving you's my only house by probablylily
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The Favourite Everything by khaleesiofalicante
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
05 Mar 2026
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Summary
“You are not broken, Ilya,” Terry says, sounding a little stern now. “I told you to keep an eye on the side effects. How long have you been experiencing this?”
“Since last night.”
“What?”
“Since last night,” Ilya repeats. “Or afternoon, technically.”
And Terry…Terry fucking laughs.
Ilya is going to die, and Shane will be sad forever and Terry fucking laughs.
“It hasn’t even been a day?” Terry clarifies, still chuckling. “Well, this could have nothing to do with the medication. It could just be an off day—”
“Off day?” Ilya repeats incredulously. “Have you seen my husband? There are no off days with an ass like that.”
OR: Ilya starts taking antidepressants only to realise it's fucking up his sex life. And, he acts totally very chill about it.
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Bookmarked by ColorMeParanoid
29 Mar 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
The Favourite Everything by khaleesiofalicante
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something you can fix by some1_around
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
27 Dec 2025
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Summary
Maybe if the video ended there, Shane thought, it would be okay. Okayish. Still incriminating. Still a fucking disaster. Still embarrassing, to have his breakup with this beautiful actress filmed and disseminated on Reddit of all fucking places, but not a nail in his coffin, burying him alive. But the video didn’t end there.
“Can I ask if you’ve ever been with another guy?” she had to ask.
And he, tears visible in his eyes, had to nod.
Just once. Just a single nod.
Why did he have to nod?
“Have you ever told anyone that before?” He shook his head. “Was it different? With a guy?”
“Of course.”
Of course.
“Was it better?”
“Yes.”
+++
Shane’s conversation with Rose is secretly recorded. Months later, after the All-Star game and Ilya’s confession in Russian, the video gets leaked online. Shane is outed to the world while Ilya is in Russia, and must now finish the 2016-2017 season with the entire world in on his secret.
Series
- Part 1 of something you can fix
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Dying Is an Art (I Do It Exceptionally Well) by cawthraven for trevino
Fandoms: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
17 Dec 2022
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Summary
After Buffy crawls out of her grave, she finds a familiar place to rest. It's quiet and safe, and the vampire who lives there can take care of her.
Bookmarked by ColorMeParanoid
28 Jul 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Dying Is an Art (I Do It Exceptionally Well) by cawthraven