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Wasting Away Again in the Goldilocks Zone by ckret2
Fandoms: Gravity Falls, The Book of Bill - Fandom
04 Oct 2025
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Bill jailbreaks the afterlife via reincarnation. With half his powers missing. And is immediately captured.
But neither side knows whether killing his new body will unleash a feeble human ghost or a powerful energy being and no one's risking it. No prob! Bill's sure he can befriend or escape his captors before they find a god-killing weapon; but THEY'LL never befriend HIM—
—enter Mabel Pines.
Listen, y'all know what to expect from a human Bill redemption fic. But this is the only one that's about: the dysphoria of being a triangle in an alien body; gifted kid burnout; befriending the ENTIRE town (we're talking Robbie, Mrs. Gleeful, Tyler, EVERYONE); and... Bill getting cursed to forget how doorknobs work. (Plus illustrations!!)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 137,926
- Chapters:
- 26/?
- Comments:
- 722
- Kudos:
- 1,010
- Bookmarks:
- 285
- Hits:
- 24,729
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
21 Apr 2025
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Bill Cipher is a traumatized burnout with a trust fund who looks at Ford Pines and thinks "I can make him worse". Ford is a defense attorney who looks at this walking car crash of a man and thinks "I can fix him".
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
03 Apr 2025
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Your standard "Bill gets dumped on Earth as a last resort for his rehabilitation" story. The Pines have a list of rules for Bill to follow, but little do they know he's working on a list of his own...
Despite that menacing description this will be mostly silly fluff, some angst and eventually smut.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 96,455
- Chapters:
- 38/38
- Comments:
- 962
- Kudos:
- 1,181
- Bookmarks:
- 134
- Hits:
- 29,848
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
10 Mar 2025
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When weirdness rises, Stanford Pines finds himself at the mercy of his mortal enemy, who insists on spending every moment together. Between Bill's flippant mood swings from saccharine, patronizing affection to flaming rage, and Ford's deeply buried past feelings of adoration of the triangle beginning to forcibly resurface, something is brewing between the two of them that even fellow Nightmare Realmers shudder to think of coming between.
Or: Bill's misadventures with his new pet human
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
09 Mar 2025
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Bill Cipher has not been doing well in theraprism.
In fact, he's made such little progress that The Axolotl is no longer sure if he can be redeemed.
Bill is given one last chance: return to Gravity Falls to make amends with the Pines family and prove he can change or be permanently erased from the fabric of the universe.
He jumps at the opportunity, confident he can find a way out of his agreement, but with the Pines keeping so close an eye on him, will he succeed? Or will his new human condition bring about a change of heart he hadn't anticipated?Alternatively:
The Pines try to teach a trillion year old dream demon about love and empathy.As of right now, I’m updating this every other Sunday. If you want to know about any delays, early updates, or to come interact and check out some cool fanart, you can find me here!
https://www.tumblr.com/sapphosscribe- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 554,560
- Chapters:
- 42/60
- Comments:
- 3,208
- Kudos:
- 3,752
- Bookmarks:
- 393
- Hits:
- 106,247
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
07 Mar 2025
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Summary
Why had Frills dropped him here? In Gravity Falls, sure. But why not in town or better yet, at his statue. Why the Mystery Shack of all places? Did the Axolotl expect him to approach them? Bill laughed aloud at the thought. Ax actually thought that Bill was going to go asking for help from them? His worst enemies? The ones responsible for his downfall? His DEATH? Yeah, no. Bill Cipher does not grovel. He also doesn’t know the first thing about being human, sure. But he can figure it out. All by himself. Without any magic. (Oh boy. But still.)
Bill turned his back on the Mystery Shack and walked away.
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
21 Feb 2025
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Summary
After centuries of therapy Bill has shown no signs of progress, in fact, one might say that he got worse. Prone to violent outbursts, dissociative spells and manic episodes, he has proven himself to be a challenge even to the most competent doctors in the universe. Most methods used were quite unhelpful and the conclusions Bill's hundreds of therapists reached ranged from "danger to himself and others, must be kept under observation" to "kill it with fire, i quit this job!". So as it stands, The Axolotl has two options left:
Leave Bill Cipher to perish
or
Earth Rehabilitation
What's the worst that could happen, really?
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
21 Feb 2025
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Summary
The deal? Bill gets to live out a specific amount of time only known to the Axolotl (described as the time needed for him to be ready for rehabilitation, which good luck with that because he is living forever in that case) as a fleshy semi-human. Sounds pretty good so far. He gets some basic powers like fire, healing, levitation, ect.
And in exchange he has to be Stanford Pines' Personal Guardian "Angel".
It would have been a particularly cruel joke if the Axolotl hadn't looked so serious with its adorable puppy dog-esque mouth. Strange paw-hand pushed up near its approximation of a temple in a grimace while it waited for Bill to stop laughing.
"This is your last chance, Bill. I'll give you time to think about it." And then it was gone.
Series
- Part 1 of Guardian Angle
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
15 Feb 2025
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Summary
Bill comes back two years later in human form. Sent by the Axolotl after he hit a road block in the 'prism.
Ford's just like 'this might as well happen'
Stan's unenthusiastic but old.
That's it ig.
Mental illness abound ♡
Series
- Part 1 of To love me is to suffer me
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
15 Feb 2025
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don’t feel bad for the suicidal cats ( gotta kill themselves nine times before they get it right ) by orphan_account
Fandoms: Gravity Falls
27 Jan 2025
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a once all knowing being ,
reduced to minimum wage employee .Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
14 Feb 2025
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One way to absolve his crime—
A different form, a different time.Those were the agreed upon terms. Bill’s been in the Theraprism for thirty years now, and the Axolotl has decided he’s ready for rehabilitation. In a pre-owned body Bill hardly understands with rules and conditions he must adhere to, he has been given one simple task before he is declared stable: build his moral compass from the ground up. Bill must rely on human kindness, forgiveness, and himself to solve a seemingly impossible moral dilemma posed to him by the Axolotl. But will an old rekindled flame help or hinder his progress?
⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂☆
Handyman Bill AU where Bill gradually earns the trust of those around him and also has medusa hair. Billford secret dating, occasional smut (smut chapters are labeled!).- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 262,076
- Chapters:
- 21/26
- Comments:
- 1,039
- Kudos:
- 1,235
- Bookmarks:
- 130
- Hits:
- 34,647
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
10 Feb 2025
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For millennia, Bill Cipher tried to build a portal between the Nightmare Realm and another dimension, with little to no success. One day, he meets a young human scientist and things start to change.
Too bad that also applies to him.Prequel to There's something queer about Grunkle Ford!.
You don't need to read the sequel to understand this story.Series
- Part 3 of That Queer Grunkle AU
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
04 Feb 2025
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Summary
"Stanford Pines was nothing if not prepared. But he definitely wasn't prepared to what Bill Cipher had in store"
In which Bill Cipher is not a powerful nightmare realm demon, but instead a demon of a different kind— a succubus*. Ford (Ever the opportunist) strikes a deal with Bill, one in which he will let the demon feed off him as long as he leaves the townsfolk alone.
Together they will navigate through the mess they both are, trying to deal with their own emotions and acknowledging their flawed attitudes.
Or alternatively;
What originally started as a joke between me and my friend, became a whole fanfic.*DISCLAIMER: I'm aware succubus is the female version of an incubus but I used succubus instead because it's more well known and I feel fits Bill better.
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
02 Feb 2025
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Trust is a matter that affects us both. by Tristan_Quincy_Felicitas
Fandoms: Gravity Falls
05 Mar 2025
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Summary
Bill is sent to Gravity Falls as a human and ends up distraught and frightened by his own inadequacy on Ford's doorstep.
Or in other words: Both freaks need therapy
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 119,485
- Chapters:
- 50/50
- Comments:
- 443
- Kudos:
- 428
- Bookmarks:
- 34
- Hits:
- 11,507
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
27 Jan 2025
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Summary
The twins Dipper and Mabel Pines are sent for the summer to Gravity Falls, Oregon. There, they meet their "grunkles" and the other people working in the Mystery Shack, Grunkle Stan's tourist trap: Wendy the shop clerk, Soos the handyman, and William the research assistant. Everything seems normal, but where's Grunkle Ford? And why does it feel like he's hiding a dark secret?
Series
- Part 1 of That Queer Grunkle AU
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
22 Jan 2025
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Summary
As punishment for Bill Cipher's wicked deeds, he is sent to work 50 years at the Mystery Shack. "This is easy! I'm a trillion years old! 50 years is nothing on me!” He tells himself, but little does he know about the trauma and embarrassment he is about to go through. Especially since it's summer.
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
22 Jan 2025
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Summary
"Stan was alone, the portal his only companion, he had been like this for a while now. Hunger was consuming him, unable to bring himself to eat anything at all. He could feel the strength leaving him as he cried, lamenting the absence of his brother. It was his fault, it always was. He didn't know what to do, what this portal was, and he was alone, completely alone. He just needed someone to help him. Someone who actually knew what to do."
His pleas were heard and that's when Fiddleford comes into the picture.
In which Fiddleford goes to “have a word” with Ford (he is so going to erase his memories) some months after the portal incident but finds instead a barely alive Stanley Pines in the basement. Fiddleford will now be forced to face all his wrong doings and become a better person. All while trying to bring back Ford along with Stan, having to earn his trust and maybe something more along the way.
Will contain lots of hurt but also comfort. And also, most importantly, Stan being happy (eventually).
Or alternatively
I need some Fiddleford acting his age and being the jerk he is. The man can be a little shit, as a treat.FINISHED, CONTAINS SOME ART.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 128,787
- Chapters:
- 48/48
- Comments:
- 1,269
- Kudos:
- 1,171
- Bookmarks:
- 122
- Hits:
- 25,103
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
19 Jan 2025
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Summary
Are we our intentions? Our thoughts? Our deeds?
Or are we our memories?
When an amnesiac man arrives at the Mystery Shack’s doorstep, the only thing familiar to him is a name: Bill. Stanford takes the strange young man, whom they have dubbed ‘William’, in under the assumption he is another one of Cipher’s victims, tortured, discarded, and left a shell of his former self. However, this ‘former self’ may be more complicated than any of the Pines anticipated…
Series
- Part 1 of Outside Stars
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 203,702
- Chapters:
- 55/55
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 2,567
- Kudos:
- 2,750
- Bookmarks:
- 246
- Hits:
- 73,001
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
18 Jan 2025
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*On hiatus due to author babying their injured corgi and injuring themselves in the process*
There are very few things in the multiverse that can truly scare Bill Cipher. He’s been around far longer than nearly all the inhabitants of it, and he’s so powerful the mere concept of him as a being would make the more inferior one’s brains implode. So, there’s not much that can put the fear of Axolotl in him.
Today, however, he found one of the exceptions.
Because today, Stanford Filbrick Pines had a brain aneurism rupture.
And Bill isn’t entirely certain he’s ever going to wake up again.
And that fucking terrifies Bill.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 51,937
- Chapters:
- 14/20
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 116
- Kudos:
- 300
- Bookmarks:
- 28
- Hits:
- 5,892
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
12 Jan 2025
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Summary
Stan and Ford are getting ready for the kids' return when Bill shows up at their door, human and covered in blood. They decide to keep his return from the kids.
Bill wants to gain back his power, freedom and his Fordsy. Stan is willing to kill him to keep the kids safe and unaware. Ford finds the worst Bill can do is flirt with him, so with the low potential risk, he tells a few white lies and studies Bill in secret.
Dipper can tell right away something is going on, but has no clue what. Mabel senses a love story waiting to happen and takes matters into her own hands.
TL/DR: Bill just wants to have fun, and fucking his ex-devotee while he tries to regain his power is very fun. Everyone is either hiding something or trying to put the pieces together.
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TW: Self Harm, Gore, Mentions of Suicidal Intent
Bookmarked by Irisrubyyouknowwho
08 Jan 2025