1 - 20 of 28 Bookmarks by Roboticallyarmed
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Geralt's Unknowing Courtship of Death by Rxel
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
07 Oct 2022
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Summary
"What the fuck do you mean I've been courting you my whole life?"
Jaskier, personification of Death, bemused and a little bit entertained, strums his lute. "You really didn't know this whole time? But I told you when we first met."
Geralt thought about it and slowly put his hand on his face. "Fuck."
--
Geralt has been having the strangest few weeks. First, he acquires a bard from a shitty tavern in Posada who spouts some nonsense at him despite it being clear that he couldn't possibly be the person he was talking about. He's certain he would have remembered meeting him in his relatively long life.
Second, the bard - Jaskier - doesn't seem like he's leaving any time soon despite Geralt trying to lose him.
Third, Jaskier keeps looking at him. He keeps touching him. He keeps... He keeps. And it's doing something strange to him. His stomach flips, and he originally thought he was sick, but as time continues to pass, he has to acknowledge the fact that may or may not be acquiring feelings for said bard.
And that horse. Why was it... green? Given, it's the lightest shade of green, but really?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 63,686
- Chapters:
- 26/?
- Collections:
- 11
- Comments:
- 872
- Kudos:
- 3,280
- Bookmarks:
- 809
- Hits:
- 67,175
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
02 Aug 2022
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“So you’re a night owl,” Trevor said, somewhere in his second week making drinks for Adrian. He set the latte in front of him and squeezed into the chair on the other side of Adrian’s usual table. “Student? Grad student? Surprisingly young professor?”
“You’re full of questions tonight,” Adrian said. He drew the ceramic bowl closer, wrapping his pale hands around it; Trevor ignored his soft sigh, the way his eyelashes fluttered at the warmth soaking into his palms.
***
When a golden-haired stranger walked into his coffee shop late one night, Trevor thought three things: he was beautiful, he had a shitty attitude, and it was a fucking terrible time for Sypha to go on her break and leave all the work to him.
Two weeks later, Trevor's view had shifted: Adrian was still irritatingly beautiful...and someone he had a hell of a lot of fun talking to.
And two weeks after that? Well. No one could ever accuse Trevor of making good decisions.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,773
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 137
- Kudos:
- 1,133
- Bookmarks:
- 263
- Hits:
- 10,778
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
28 Mar 2020
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Dungeons & Striders by Mortior
Fandoms: Homestuck, Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
13 Jul 2019
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Summary
After the royal family of Derse is murdered, Prince Dirk Strider mysteriously wakes up in his grave and embarks on a 500-year quest for revenge.
Meanwhile, Dave Strider is the last of a royal lineage that was almost wiped out 500 years ago, and now his undead ancestor has arrived in Prospit to kill their family's murderer...
If the paladin and the lich don't kill each other first.
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
06 Dec 2019
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Summary
Pirate captain Dirk Strider returns to port to restock, recruit, and to see (read: feel up) his little brother Dave, a lieutenant in the Queen's Navy. Dave is less than pleased to see him.
Pseudo-historical pirate AU, born from the sentence: "What if Dirk was like Jack Sparrow, and Dave was Norrington?"
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
06 Dec 2019
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Summary
“Go on,” he says, nudging your cheek. Your lips bump against his tip and he stretches his neck, closes his eyes. “Put that mouth to better use.”
Oh, you’ll fucking show him. You’ll make him choke on that attitude.
▬▬▬
John and Dirk dabble in BDSM
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
27 Jun 2018
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The Striders are infamous demon hunters, feared by all the demons in the land. But John Egbert knows better. He knows that together he and Dave can defy fate.
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
09 Jun 2018
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What happens when your meal starts trying to romance you?
That's basically the entire premise of this mermay fic. Jake English is a pretty, but fairly harmless merman, while Dirk Strider literally has a whole canyon to himself after he 'cleared out' all the previous inhabitants. An obviously dangerous dude, Jake's nevertheless sets his sights on befriending this carnivore nevertheless and embarks on a journey full of tentative interactions, home invasion (according to Dirk) and also some pretty graphic dinner times.
Like, seriously graphic.
So if that ain't your jam, you might want to be careful treading forwards. Otherwise, enjoy the sea of shenanigans ahead!
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
08 Jun 2018
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Summary
You've determined the hobbies of the monarch you serve are as follows:
1. Ill-timed pranks.
2. Cooking.
3. Subconsciously pulling elaborate political schemes off perfectly, ad infinitum, every one of which inches his mind closer to some ineffable dark chasm you're curious to find the depth of.Anyway, he makes damn good lasagna.
(although part of a series, this fic is a standalone. feel free to read this first!)
Series
- Part 3 of Catacombs
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 156,428
- Chapters:
- 34/34
- Comments:
- 816
- Kudos:
- 968
- Bookmarks:
- 208
- Hits:
- 22,341
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
07 Jun 2018
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Summary
How the hell do you handle the first month of school when you had drunken phone sex with one of your students over the summer?
Turns out, not very well.
Series
- Part 2 of bad decisions
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
07 Jun 2018
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Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
07 Jun 2018
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Summary
Dave and Dirk are finally leaving home for university. They are going to enjoy their new freedom.
Series
- Part 2 of Striderverse
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
07 Jun 2018
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- Words:
- 18,722
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 12
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
07 Jun 2018
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- Words:
- 26,437
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 57
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
07 Jun 2018
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Summary
Based on the song Hurricane by Halsey.
Jake is so 'graciously' given the gift of one night with a prostitute for his birthday. He's reluctant at first, but shocked to find that love at first sight does in fact exist. Or rather, love at first fuck. Whatever the case, he's got it bad for this blond and he'll do just about anything to free him from the services of one notorious Bro Strider.
There's a storm you're starting nowBookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
07 Jun 2018
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Summary
AKA the series in which John, Jake, Dave, and Dirk are all boyfriends and have all kinds of fun sexy shenanigans
- Words:
- 19,969
- Works:
- 8
- Bookmarks:
- 23
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
03 Dec 2017
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Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
02 Dec 2017
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Summary
Everything was going great. Itch nicely scratched, attractive guy on his arm, a wild night of sex to show for it.. and a new bite mark that leaves a lot to be explained by a presumptuous vampire with a thirst for something hot blooded.
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
02 Dec 2017
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Summary
It is not often that Dave Strider, sunglass-wearing stoic teenager and definitive psychopath, shows any hint of positive emotion.
And it's all because of that infuriating teen with his perfect looks and charm. It drove Dave crazy.He just wanted John by his side.
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
02 Dec 2017
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Summary
When Fate speaks, it is not often with a whisper but with a shout. In Dave's case, it shouted that his destined spouse was the boogeyman of a mage who skulked about his village each season, Ambrose, rumored by many to be more monster than man. With that declaration it decided his path and set the wheels of his future into motion in a direction he never could have dreamed of. With magic now invading his life from every angle, the son of a farmer is going to have a lot of adjusting to do if he hopes to figure out why Fate decided to pair him off with such a man, or why the man has such a reputation of being a monster in disguise.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 69,215
- Chapters:
- 10/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 59
- Kudos:
- 210
- Bookmarks:
- 28
- Hits:
- 2,964
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
02 Dec 2017
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Summary
Karkat has had a shitty life and has had to bust his ass for everything he has. He has no patience for spoiled, delusional, lazy people and this is exactly what he thinks Dave Strider is. They get paired up together for a project in their college English class and when Karkat accidently learns that Dave is fighting to keep custody of his younger brother Dirk, he learns that he may have been completely wrong about Dave and shouldn't have judged a book by it's cover. A story of two damaged boys coming to each others rescue and growing as people. <3
Series
- Part 1 of Covers
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 136,612
- Chapters:
- 28/28
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,027
- Kudos:
- 2,476
- Bookmarks:
- 446
- Hits:
- 48,697
Bookmarked by Roboticallyarmed
02 Dec 2017