1 - 20 of 23 Bookmarks by liquidnitrogen
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CROWLEY: I try not to make a habit of gratitude, but I must give our appreciation to everyone out there who’s been listening and subscribing to The Ineffable Plan.
AZIRAPHALE: Ooh, yes, we’ve become quite popular, haven’t we?
CROWLEY: Yeah, just hit number eight on the advice charts … No advertising at all.
AZIRAPHALE: Mm. How … miraculous.
CROWLEY: … Aziraphale. You did not.***
Crowley and Aziraphale are very possibly the people least qualified, on the entire planet, to start up an advice podcast.
But what else is there to do when the world isn’t ending anytime soon, you’re technically on indefinite sabbatical from your lifelong careers, and you need a plausible excuse to spend more time with your best friend who you’re definitely not, absolutely not, maybe just a little, actually maybe overwhelmingly in love with?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,541
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 9
- Comments:
- 1,184
- Kudos:
- 21,871
- Bookmarks:
- 5,839
- Hits:
- 142,173
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
09 Dec 2023
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“It’s just,” he continued, “I’ve noticed that humans—some humans, anyway—they use that word, angel, as a…well, as a sort of…endearment.”
“Do they?” said Crowley, who had invented using the word as an endearment in the 13th century AD.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,520
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 477
- Kudos:
- 9,798
- Bookmarks:
- 1,996
- Hits:
- 67,768
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
06 Dec 2023
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And They Were Streamers by ghostrat
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
04 Aug 2025
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(Human) Twitch Streamer AU, as shared on Tumblr! (ATWS / #ineffable streamers)
Aziraphale and Crowley are two polar opposite Twitch streamers who are exceedingly popular in their own ways. Besides their moderators, no one watching would ever guess that they live together. Nor that their feelings run a whole lot deeper than friendship.
(Abandoned, but includes all the draft notes for how the story ends)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 52,695
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 1,768
- Kudos:
- 4,212
- Bookmarks:
- 771
- Hits:
- 95,305
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
06 Dec 2023
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For ten years, Mary Allamby Bonnet has barely given any thought to her "late" husband Stede. She's been far too busy enjoying her life as his wealthy widow. Until the night that Stede appears at her door, badly wounded, in the arms of the most feared pirate in history.
Until that moment Mary had never truly believed the Wanted posters that claimed Stede as a "known associate" of Blackbeard's. Yet here he is, in her home, less the legendary pirate captain than simply Stede's Ed, a man terrified of losing the love of his life. He won't, though. Not if Mary has anything to say about it.
Or, Mary and Ed nurse Stede back to health and in doing so form a friendship.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,672
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 180
- Kudos:
- 1,827
- Bookmarks:
- 412
- Hits:
- 16,245
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
23 Nov 2023
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The 80s are in full swing, and the golden decade of Nintendo Gameboys’ and Sony Walkmans’ has never looked better. In the neon jungle, Stede Bonnet, a young salaryman, meets enigmatic mechanic apprentice Edward Teach, and the pair strike up an unlikely friendship via fax machine, page beepers and gifts in the mail.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 118,107
- Chapters:
- 90/?
- Comments:
- 2,685
- Kudos:
- 4,155
- Bookmarks:
- 1,134
- Hits:
- 130,762
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
21 Nov 2023
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It would be a gross understatement to say that Crowley simply didn't like Aziraphale. He was posh and stuffy and arrogant, and Crowley couldn't figure out why everyone else in the program liked him so much. It hardly mattered; they were competitors, and Crowley didn't need to make friends to become a surgeon.
It takes several unleasant encounters, the excessive use of house plants as a coping mechanism, and getting stuck in an elevator for Crowley to start reconsidering his priorities.
Or...
Crowley and Aziraphale are surgical interns with competitive streaks a mile wide each, and they really do not like each other at all.
Until they do.(This whole fic is pre-written and completed, and updates will usually be weekly on Saturdays!)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 84,067
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 991
- Kudos:
- 1,687
- Bookmarks:
- 425
- Hits:
- 34,335
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
30 Sep 2023
Bookmarker's Collections:
Bookmarker's Notes
the gomens au ever
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Old Vines by sevdrag (seventhe)
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
01 Mar 2021
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A.Z. Fell, one of the most respected names in wine and food blogging, has been sent on assignment with his assistant Warlock Dowling to spend six months in California Wine Country. Under direction (by his boss, Gabriel) to use this experience to double his blog followers and write a novel, Aziraphale is both excited and anxious about the opportunity.
Anthony J. Crowley is the owner and viticulturalist of Ecdyses, a winery that unexpectedly fell into his lap eleven years ago when he hit rock bottom. He may be in debt, yeah, but he’s paying off his loans — and despite pressure from his lenders and their team of inspectors, Crowley has found a kind of contentment tending his little corner of terroir and producing extraordinary wine. Crowley’s old vines are the heart of his vineyard, and he’s never let anyone in.
Crowley finds Aziraphale intriguing; Aziraphale finds Crowley enthralling. Turns out a famous wine expert and an experienced viticulturalist can still learn things from each other. The summer of 2019 unfolds.
Series
- Part 1 of Ecdyses (The Old Vines universe)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 189,706
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Collections:
- 17
- Comments:
- 3,199
- Kudos:
- 3,362
- Bookmarks:
- 1,336
- Hits:
- 119,618
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
20 Aug 2023
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Aziraphale Fell runs a successful food blog, Celestial Comestibles, where he shares mouthwatering recipes and heartwarming stories about his happy domestic life in a cottage with his husband and son. As promotion for his upcoming cookbook, his publishers run a contest: one lucky winner will get to spend Christmas with Aziraphale and his family.
What the publishers don't know is that the real Aziraphale Fell is a single city-dweller. And if he wants to keep up his happily married persona, he'll have to acquire a cottage, husband, and son before Christmas.
As it happens, his friend and neighbor Anthony Crowley has his nephew staying with him for the holidays. One fake marriage proposal later, and everything seems tickety-boo--as long as Aziraphale can keep from developing inconveniently real feelings for his pretend husband...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,030
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 11
- Comments:
- 871
- Kudos:
- 3,273
- Bookmarks:
- 734
- Hits:
- 31,462
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
19 Aug 2023
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in the study with the lead pipe by teethandblood
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
14 Sep 2022
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The year is 1845, and Aziraphale, a rare books dealer, would like to retire early. His plans are scuttled when a mysterious letter is dropped on his stoop - a threat of blackmail from one Lord Gabriel, a wealthy American living out in the English countryside. An already tense dinner with 5 other blackmail victims (one of which is the famous actor Anthony J. Crowley) takes a turn for the worse when their host reveals that they are locked in the mansion, the blackmail materials are in the mailbox outside, and the police are set to arrive in 24 hours.
The only way to truly protect your secrets is to send them to the grave. Aziraphale and Crowley must find the front door key and escape...or die trying.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,732
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 51
- Kudos:
- 182
- Bookmarks:
- 34
- Hits:
- 1,640
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
01 Aug 2023
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But Thinking Makes It So by Habie, kayzowl
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
28 Aug 2019
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“I—Um… Er.” Aziraphale looked down at the painting and up at the stranger and back again a few times helplessly. “Uhhh.”
“Well said.”
“It was an accident,” he blurted the first thing he could think.
“Oh, I can tell that ,” he removed his shoulder from the bookshelf in a way that made it look like an effort, as if he were doing the bookshelf a favor, and took a long step towards Aziraphale and his pile of glass and canvas and wood. “Now I’m just curious what your next move is going to be.”
Bookmarked by liquidnitrogen
21 Jul 2023
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Anthony Crowley sells computer systems to London businesses–and specializes in sneaking extra charges and fees into the associated contracts. It’s not his fault no one actually reads the paperwork before signing it.
He thinks mild-mannered bookshop owner Aziraphale Fell will be an easy mark; surely no one that old-fashioned and dotty will spot a few carefully-worded technical clauses in his contract.
And then Aziraphale comes back with some very polite, very pointed questions – and Crowley decides that maybe pulling off the sale isn’t his first priority anymore…
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i'll be your man if you got love to get done by mygalfriday (BrinneyFriday)
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
13 Aug 2019
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Tucking his sunglasses into the neck of his black t-shirt, he scans the crowded space for the man Anathema had described. Blond, she’d said. A bit old-fashioned. Crowley had taken that to mean no shagging until the third date but his eyes land on a man who looks like he just returned from tea in the Victorian era and he just knows he’s found his date. Ezra Fell.
Series
- Part 1 of the blind date au
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All This (and Heaven Too) by GaryOldman
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
11 Oct 2019
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Summary
"By the time first class had ended, Crowley had learnt two things. The first: Philosophy and Ancient Religion managed to tread the line between being a doss-subject and totally impossible to wrap your head around. The second: Aziraphale remembered him. "
Crowley's first day at a new college brings with it someone he never thought he'd see again.
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Highschool AU Ineffable Husbands
Now including a bonus chapter! -
Texts from an Unknown Number by GaryOldman
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
30 Apr 2020
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The human wrong number AU I have been craving.
Trapped at a boring Halloween party, Aziraphale tries to get in touch with Gabriel but his text ends up in the wrong place.
GorillazGal86 and Literarion have done a pod fic of this one, which you can listen to here! https://archiveofourown.org/works/29542161/
Series
- Part 1 of Wrong Number AU
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Strawberry Wine by GaryOldman
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
07 May 2020
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Summary
Human AU Ineffable Husbands one shot.
"You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you." - Richard Siken
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How to Win a Lifetime Achievement Award for Services to Television (and how not to) by GaryOldman for cellsinterlinked
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
03 Mar 2021
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Crowley hosts a late night comedy talk show. Aziraphale hosts a feel good morning talk show.
When Crowley is asked to present Aziraphale with a lifetime achievement award, everything goes a bit skew-whiff.
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Normally when I don’t get something that everyone else seems to be mad on my first point of call is the wonderful world of the internet, but we’ve had a falling out you see, the internet and I. Despite my many years as late night show host meets investigative journalist meets comic genius meets veritable sex god (though Wikipedia only acknowledges the first of these accomplishments, despite my many attempts at editing the listing) they have turned on me.
I’m a gif. And a meme.
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The Eden Literature Festival by GaryOldman
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
30 Sep 2021
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Summary
“Temptation has been on several of the bestseller lists. Have you read it?” and really, he couldn’t be blamed for brushing it off with a sharp no, which of course, made the headline and the bulk of the write up. A. Z. Fell calls Temptation ‘populist rubbish’. Full interview on page 34. He was almost certain he hadn’t called it rubbish… he’d been trying very hard to avoid that.
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Anthony Crowley and A Z Fell are rival authors who have nothing but terrible things to say about one another's work.
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The Road Not Taken (Leads to Home) by GaryOldman
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
02 Dec 2021
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Summary
Festive angst! A definite happy ending though, because IT’S CHRISTMAS.
Returning to his childhood home for the holidays, Aziraphale seeks out the only person he wants to see: his Christmas Eve booty-call he happens to be in love with.
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Aziraphale stares at the house as the cab pulls over. This is the part he’s expected to get out, tip generously, festive wishes all around and seasons greetings to everyone inside. The imported Jeep in the drive tells him that Gabe at least is already here. He should want to go in. This is why he’s here.“On second thoughts, could you take me to this address?”
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Crowley worked in Sales. He had never intended to work in Sales. It had just sort of happened. One moment, there he’d been, a newly minted university graduate off to change the world, exquisitely useless Philosophy degree in hand, and now here he was, having sauntered vaguely downwards into a Hell that consisted mainly of cold-calling new customers and sucking up to existing ones.
AU based on The Office.